Author's Notes: Thanks to Theo and the various transcript people for helping me write this part. This chapter touches on season 3 Charmed eps "Wrestling With Demons", and "Bride And Gloom".
---
Chapter Ten
Previously on Second Life...
Halliwell Manor, San Francisco, California.
Early February, 2002
Xander Harris lay in bed, thinking.
His shift at P3 was over, and he was glad to now be able to get a little relaxation time. It seemed that things had been pretty hectic lately.
Recently he had been talking with Prue and Piper, and the topic of the sisters' little trip to the future back in the year 2000 had cropped up. Thus, Harris had learned that Future Leo had mentioned to the two Charmed Ones how Buffy had been shot and killed in her own backyard in a few months time, and that Willow had gone completely insane and butchered her killer afterwards.
Needless to say, that had not made him a happy camper. Xander had thus asked Leo to quickly orb him to the Hellmouth, to inform the others of the situation.
The former Zeppo had found out that some low-level pest named Warren something-or-another had been up to certain nefarious activities. Petty and not-so-petty theft, stalking, attempted mind control, and just generally annoying the hell out of the resident Chosen One. He was obviously no Angelus or the Mayor, but the problem was Warren had somehow acquired a partner; a possibly-gay individual named Andrew Wells who was not without his own skill in summoning demon minions.
Now normally, Xander wouldn't have worried that Buffy would eventually take care of business. But after observing the way Spike was acting, it had dawned on him that the chipped wonder might know more than he was letting on about the Duo of Dorkness. Thus, a quick phone call to LA to summon Kennedy and Angel had seemed to be in order, as the bleached-blond menace somehow seemed to have pulled the wool over everyone else's eyes in Sunnydale.
Well, apart from his old pal Jesse of course, but he didn't really count. As the whitelighter wasn't always around, and even when he was it was just to interact with Tara.
Later, Xander had to admit that he had gotten a kick out of watching Soul Boy and the Chosen One threaten Billy Idol that way. Not to mention how his brunette Slayer pal had tracked down the enemy lair in almost no time, and kicked the ass of one of Warren's sex-bots. It was just too bad no one in the Scooby gang had wanted to believe that Spike had known nothing about their activities...
Oh, well. At least Warren and Andrew had been clinked for the next ten years, after the Sunnydale cops had found all those stolen goods at their hideout. Not to mention how the sex-bot was now just a heap of scrap, and the British vampire was a lot less cocky about his untouchability factor - after Kennedy had staked him just below the heart as a warning to behave. So hopefully, all in all, crisis averted.
Xander hadn't spent long in the former hometown after that, apart from a quick conversation with Jonathan Levinson; who had confided to Cordelia's boyfriend that he was thinking of asking Anya to marry him. Harris had just sighed and simply advised Jonathan to think about it very carefully - as marriage was supposed to be forever once you said, "I do".
And the bartender had also advised the short geek to ask if his girlfriend was willing to convert to Judaism. As Xander rather doubted that the Levinson clan would unthinkingly accept any weird demonic rituals from Anya's side of the family during the ceremony. Not to mention any strange-looking demon guests.
The only other thing of interest from his trip down south had been the astonishing news that Deadboy had somehow become a father. Even though it was supposed to be impossible, last year Angel and Darla had produced a human son named Connor, who was apparently as cute as a button at three months of age. Xander hadn't been quite sure how to react upon hearing that from Kennedy, to be honest; on the one hand, Harris supposed Angel was to be congratulated upon entering the blessed realm of fatherhood even though Darla was no longer in the picture.
But on the other hand, the presence of a 'miracle child' in this world made the cynic in Xander suspect that this story somehow wouldn't have a happy ending.
Well, what the hell. Connor had two Slayers, two Watchers, a seer, a physicist, an axe-wielding demon fighter and the former Scourge of Europe in his corner. And if things ever got too hairy San Francisco was only a phone call away. Hopefully, the kid would be all right.
Suddenly Xander was distracted from his thoughts as Cordelia entered their bedroom. And after a short conversation, Doctor Love was in da house...
---
Halliwell Manor Kitchen, San Francisco, California.
Not long afterwards
"Hello!" Prue said as she saw the item on the dolly.
"You like it?" Cordelia asked gleefully. "It just arrived. And apparently, Xander just had to have one."
"Why?" her older sister asked. "For whenever you're not home?"
"Oh, ewww!" Cordelia said in distaste to that. "Make me yak from that visual!"
Prue came over and looked at the life-sized statue of Cordelia's game character, Sophia Croft. "You know...could that top possibly emphasize your cleavage any more than it already does?"
Cordelia looked at her likeness's chest. "Well," she shrugged. "Male fan boys. Big shock...but they like huge breasts!"
"You don't say?" Prue commented sarcastically, faking no knowledge on the subject. "Pray tell me, oh wise one...what else do these fan boys like?"
"Well, according to the Internet polls," Cordelia replied innocently. "Me posing in Playboy."
"Really?" Prue asked, surprised.
"Yep," Cordelia said with a smirk. "Hey, maybe we should all pose in a 'Charmed Ones' pictorial?"
"Hell, no!" Prue responded to that. "I'd never be able to work as a serious photographer again!"
"How about if I ask nicely?" Xander joked as he came back into the kitchen.
"Sorry Xand," Prue told him. "But never going to happen."
"Right. Well, a guy can dream..." Xander said with a knowing grin as he took the dolly's handle. "Cordy, you want to get the basement door?"
"You're putting it in the basement?" the oldest Charmed One asked in surprise.
Xander nodded. "Wouldn't mind having it up here, but let's be serious. A fiberglass statue like this won't last long with all the demons we constantly have popping in."
---
Unknown location, the Underworld.
A few days later
"Yikes," Cordelia said as the two extremely large wrestlers got into the ring. "You sure about this?"
"We don't have a choice," Prue replied, as she took a fighting stance. She and Cordelia were doing this to try to save the life and soul of a former boyfriend, after all.
"Come on, guys!" Piper said from her spot at ringside. "You can take these demons!"
"Xander didn't have to come, huh?" Cordelia asked her sister archly as the bell rang.
Prue didn't lose her stance. "Well, in my defence I didn't think we would have to actually wrestle demons for our souls!"
One of the human-looking demon wrestlers looked ticked off. "You look at this face! This is the face of pain, and I'm the bringer of pain! And I'm gonna destroy you! You can cry for mercy, but I don't know the meaning of the word!"
"Never thought I'd ever be glad Xander made me watch wrestling, after the way he fell in love with Wrestle Mania 17 back then," Cordelia said, as she dodged a punch and put the nearest wrestler into a hold.
"Ow!" she then yelled as the bulky demon easily threw her over his shoulder onto the mat, hard. "Okay, no more mister nice guy..."
---
Halliwell Manor Kitchen
Later that night
"We've gone through a lot ever since we got our powers. But that was the most stupid thing I've seen yet," Piper said as she sat at the table. "Wrestling for your soul..."
"Wonder if we rated a demon pay per view at least?" Cordelia wondered innocently, as she looked through the massive piles of junk that had showed up after her little 'Find Lost Things' spell. "Huh. I think this is the 'My Little Pony' I had when I was five..."
"Well, at least we found Mom's wedding ring," Prue said, as she saw something sticking out of a pile. "Whoa. This looks expensive..."
"OH MY GOD!" Cordelia yelled, as she ran over and grabbed the burnt necklace from her sister. "I don't believe it!"
"I take it that's yours?" Prue asked, amused.
Cordelia nodded quickly. "This is the locket Xander gave me for Valentine's Day during junior year! I always wanted to get this back..."
"Is this the thing Xander used for that infamous love spell, which went horribly wrong?" Piper asked, coming over. "Guess that explains the burn marks."
"Yeah, and y'know - this year's Valentine's Day isn't that far off either," Cordelia said as she examined the gold locket. "Wonder what else that spell found?"
---
Santa Cruz, California.
The same time
The blond teenager stumbled down the sidewalk in total confusion. "Where am I? And how the hell did I get here?" the 18-year-old girl asked herself, as she tried to look around for anything familiar to her.
Spotting a blue newspaper machine, she ran over to it as fast as her Prada heels could carry her. And the female's eyes instantly went wide as she saw the title of the local rag.
"Santa Cruz?" she demanded. "That can't be right..." She was then about to try to find a phone booth to call her parents, when something else on the newspaper behind the glass caught her eye. "February 10th, 2002!"
The now fully alive Harmony Kendall looked like she was going to faint. "What the hell is going on here? One moment I'm at Graduation with that big demon snake, and the next...I'm here, three years into the future? Someone's got a lot of explaining to do..."
---
Office of USAF Major Bill Peltzer, Arlington, Virginia.
Monday, February 11th 2002
11:03 am
"What's the status of the Steveston project?"
The man in the suit from the main NID office replied, "Slow going. About three-fourths of the townspeople have been taken as hosts by the cloned Goa'uld symbiotes. Estimates are that the ship they're building could be finished by mid- to late November."
"What about our people?" the Major inquired.
"One hundred percent ready," the other man said. "Ready to go in on a moment's notice to take the ship and the hosts."
"Good," Peltzer replied shortly to that. "Now, what about the so-called 'Charmed' project?"
The man shifted in his seat ever so slightly. "Our sources tell me the Charmed Ones are still active." He then sighed. "Although our man in that witch-hunter group says they're not yet ready to strike at the Halliwell home."
Peltzer rolled his eyes. "That group would take a goddamn year just to pick what they wanted for lunch!"
The man agreed but also said, "Well, they're a religious cult. We can't urge them forward too much without getting the brass suspicious."
"I've got half a mind just to have our own black ops team go in and capture those witches, you know," the Major said in annoyance.
"With all due respect," the man replied, "that would be a big mistake. We still don't know the limits of what they can do, and that sort of thing might provoke a bloodbath that we could never satisfactorily cover up. Besides, we saw how well the military handled the supernatural over there in Sunnydale."
"You can relax about that part of it," Peltzer said to that. "I don't intend to shove those behavior modifying chips into the Charmed Ones' heads. I'm sure we can recruit them without that. They're American citizens, so when asked to serve their country I think they won't object too strenuously."
"Well, I don't think we'll be 'asking' them, if you know what I mean," the NID man replied. "But from my reports, they have their own battles to fight. And apparently, such things take priority."
"No," Peltzer shook his head. "Stopping a HST every few weeks or so pales in comparison to stopping an all-out Goa'uld attack!"
"I still don't see what real effect they can generate against the snakes, to be honest," the NID man said.
"Are you kidding?" Peltzer demanded, as he looked at an open folder on his desk. "Listen to these powers. The oldest can move things with her mind, a thousand times better than any of those old programs they tried to develop during the Cold War. The middle one can literally freeze enemy soldiers at will, or disintegrate them. And the youngest is reported to get visions of the future."
"But how can they use these abilities, say, against a fleet of Goa'uld Death Gliders?" the other man asked.
"Well, that's what our testing is for," Peltzer replied. "Only this time, we don't put in charge a female megalomaniac who wants to build a personal army of demon zombies!"
---
And now...
Halliwell Manor Sitting Room
Tuesday, February 12th 2002
8:55 pm
Cordelia was dressed in rumpled old sweat pants and a T-shirt while curled up on the couch watching a DVD. Xander was at P3, while her sisters were off doing something else, so this was the perfect time to start munching on popcorn and watch 'Ten Things I Hate About You'.
On the screen, Kat Stratford was kissing the character called Patrick as the camera started to pull away from her car in the middle of the lot...
And then it stopped at the end of the parking lot. Next to a classic car, one that a high school kid could afford to drive only in the movies, a male form shimmered into existence.
Cordelia dropped the popcorn in shock. "Cole?"
Cole Turner, a.k.a. Belthazor, walked to the edge of the screen for her to see him better. "Cordelia, hi. And yeah, this is real. It's a little trick I learned from the demon of illusion."
"But what..." Cordy tried to say, not understanding.
"...am I doing here?" Cole finished her question. "Well, uh, I wasn't sure how you'd react. Thought this might be a safer way of letting you know I'm back...for good."
"Oh boy," Cordelia said with a great deal of inner conflict, as Cole vanished from the screen as quickly as he'd appeared.
---
P3 club, San Francisco, California.
The same time
Prue and a good-looking young man named Justin walked outside of the club at the end of their date. "So, um, I had a really good time tonight, Justin."
"Did you? I mean, really?" Justin asked her somewhat suspiciously. "Uh, the reason I ask is that you seemed kind of quiet."
Prue shook her head quickly. "I'm sorry. It's just that, you know, I've got a lot on my mind. What with Piper getting married and everything."
"Sure," he replied. "'Course, if I was the paranoid type, I'd be thinking it was because of me..." He then saw something in Prue's eyes he definitely didn't like. "Prue?"
"I'm sorry, Justin, it's not you. Really," she told him a little absently. Then she went on, "It's just - well, I was in an on-again, off-again relationship with this guy named Johnny Domino for ages-"
"The sax player at the House of Soul? I've been there," Justin interrupted.
"Yeah, it's a nice place. But see, recently we finally ended it - completely. So I guess I'm kinda gun shy right now."
Justin wisely decided to just let it go. "Right. So are we still on for lunch tomorrow?"
"Yeah," Prue told him. "Pick me up at one?"
"It's a date."
"Okay," the woman said, as they then kissed somewhat awkwardly.
"Good night," Justin said as he left his date for tonight, mentally wondering if this was even worth pursuing anymore.
"Night." Prue waved to him, before she went back inside the club. And she never even noticed the man that had been watching their conversation.
Back inside the club Prue walked over to Piper and Leo, who were sitting at the bar. The place was crowded for a week night, so the oldest Charmed One beckoned them over to their private alcove. "Hey."
Piper looked at her watch. "Gee, Prue, it's only nine and your date's already over? How very Disney of you!"
Prue waved her off. "Justin has a meeting early in the morning."
"I see," the middle sister looked pretty cynical. "So did you decide whether or not you're going to invite him to the wedding?"
"Not yet," her sibling told her. "Oh, he's a nice guy, he's sweet, but - well, he's no Johnny I'm afraid. Justin's just so predictable, you know? There's no mystery, no savoir-faire." She touched up her lipstick a little then. "You know, besides, a wedding invite definitely makes a statement."
Leo sent her a confused look. "That he can tie a bow tie?"
Prue shook her head at the typical male cluelessness. "No, that the relationship is serious, you know? That it's going somewhere. All that built-in romance, mingling with the family, hidden tensions..."
Leo looked to his fiancée, glad of this perfect opening. "All the more reason to have a nice, simple, private wedding."
Piper shook her head again at once. "Nice try, mister! Okay, the wedding planner, tomorrow at eleven. No getting out of it, no orbing out of it, no nothing. Don't even think it," the young woman told him as a warning, before she left for the bathroom.
Nearby the restrooms the man, the one that had earlier been watching Prue outside, was pretending to be on the payphone. And after the club owner went into the ladies room, the man shape-shifted into a perfect copy of Piper.
Meanwhile, Leo and Prue were still chatting in the alcove. "I don't know," the guardian angel said glumly. "I just don't want to set her up for a big disappointment, that's all. I mean, how can you possibly have a normal wedding when a ghost'll be officiating, and the groom's dead? Not to mention the fact that the bride and bridesmaids are all witches, and the best man's a future whitelighter?"
Prue gave him a pat on the back. "Leo, don't even try to figure it out, alright? It's a Cinderella complex. Every girl goes through it. I've been dreaming of this day my entire life."
Leo sent her a look. "You've been dreaming of Piper's wedding all your life?"
"No, mine!" she told him crossly. "I mean, I'm the oldest. I'm supposed to do everything first. I'm supposed to talk first and get braces and get a boyfriend and find a husband."
At that moment, the fake Piper came up to them. "Hey, Prue. Can I borrow your lipstick?"
"What?"
"Lipstick," the shape-shifter repeated. "I'm out. Do you mind?"
Prue shrugged and quickly dug the small tube out of her purse. "Sure, knock yourself out." Fake Piper took it and just walked away. "You're welcome!" Prue called after her, annoyed.
Once back in the hallway and obscured from view, the shape-shifter morphed back into his original appearance - that of a male warlock. He inspected the lipstick briefly, before blinking out of the club.
---
Unknown location, The Underworld.
The same time
The warlock, who was known as Zile reappeared in a large chamber. The sides were covered with rubble and rats, while a makeshift altar was on a stone platform. He kneeled and spoke a small summoning incantation. And only seconds later, a female demon with slightly Asian features appeared out of the ground. "Priestess Dantalian."
"Were you successful?" the demonic priestess demanded as she went around the altar.
Zile took out the lipstick, and handed it to her. "She's as beautiful as you said she'd be."
Dantalian took the small tube. "You're certain this has touched her lips?"
"Absolutely. I watched her all night," Zile declared as he watched her put things into a potions bowl. "And not to be ungrateful, but what do you get out of making Prue Halliwell my wife?"
"I'm a humble servant of the Source, Zile," the demoness said as she laid the lipstick into the bowl. "I get nothing other than the benefits we all reap whenever good is turned evil."
Zile nodded at that. "Still, for all the unions you've consecrated? It seems you should get something, especially for this one."
As she opened a box and dropped a live small scorpion into the bowl, Dantalian admitted, "There is a spoil that intrigues me." She waited a moment to observe the spell working. "The Halliwell Book of Shadows is said to be the most magical of all tomes."
"The witch's Book of Shadows?" Zile asked, surprised. "That shouldn't be too hard to get."
"It is," Dantalian told him. "Evil cannot touch it, although turning Prue evil should turn her sisters and their Book evil as well. Their magic is interconnected."
Zile grinned. "Ah, the flaw of the Charmed Ones, turn one and the others fall." He looked back to Dantalian, "Well then, I'll get it for you myself as a 'token' of my gratitude."
Dantalian dipped her hand into the bowl as she motioned him to kneel with the other. "First things first. Getting the witch here so I can perform the ceremony? That's what this potion is for." She wiped the potion over the demon's lips. "Kiss her, and it paralyzes her. After I bind you in marriage, she'll fall into a deep sleep where the transformation to evil will occur."
---
San Francisco Memorial Hospital, San Francisco, California.
The next morning
Xander and Cordelia sat in the two chairs within the small exam room as they waited. "I hope they can figure this out."
"At least we know it's not some magical curse," Cordelia pointed out. "That's a plus."
"I almost wish it was," her boyfriend told her. "Then it could just be un-spelled already."
"You sure this hasn't shown up in your family before?" Cordelia wondered.
"My relatives only pass out after drinking too much," Harris told her. "Nothing like this."
Cordelia looked at the clock for a moment before she started. "Xander, I have to tell you something that happened last..." But she was cut off as the door opened and the female doctor came in.
"Find anything?" Xander asked the woman as she sat down.
"No," the doctor admitted. "So far, we've seen nothing in your blood tests that could cause the symptoms you're describing."
"Damn," Xander sighed.
"There's no weird disease or STD that causes this?"
"STD!" Xander asked his girlfriend. "Something you're not telling me, Cor?"
"No!" Cordelia said quickly. "I mean...I don't...I never..."
"It's nothing that I've found any reference to as of yet," the doctor said, letting Cordelia off the hook. "I'm going to talk to a few specialists that have done sleep studies."
"You think I'm sleepwalking?" Xander asked her.
"At first, I would have said no," the doctor replied. "From what you've described, in your fugue state you're still active - more than you would need to be for sleepwalking. But it pays to get an expert's opinion just in case." She took out a pad and wrote out a prescription. "This is something I want you to try. Take one before bed and try to get a full eight hours sleep. And I think you better stop driving for a while."
"Do I have to?" Xander sighed. "This isn't a small town where everything is within walking distance, ya know."
"Well, I can drive the Cuda Xander," Cordelia told him. "Or else Leo can give you a lift to work and back."
"Great..." Xander said, annoyed.
A few minutes later, the doctor was watching the young couple leave as another M.D. came over. "So that's the mystery patient?" he asked her. "Heard he's having blackouts or something."
"Well, honestly, I don't know what it is yet," she told her colleague. "He's doing fine and then boom, he finds himself somewhere else with no memory of how he got there."
"Alzheimer's?" the other doctor asked.
"He's a bit young for that."
"Yeah," the second doctor said. "But it's not unheard of either."
"True. God, I really hope it's not that," Xander's doctor sighed. "Personally, I want to rule everything else out before I give that young man a diagnosis which'll totally destroy his life."
---
Halliwell Manor
A while later
Prue, Leo and the two wedding planners were standing in the foyer as Piper walked down the stairs. "Okay, so the more traditional the better as far as I'm concerned. The wedding march starts, and I come down the stairs," the middle sister told the planners.
The female planner, Marie, checked her clipboard. "So, no flower girl?"
"Nope," Piper said. "Not this time."
Marie looked around. "Well, I think we should at least dress the banister with garlands. Maybe even carry the floral theme all the way to the altar. How many guests are you planning on?"
"Uh, let me think," Piper smiled. "Fifty, sixty?"
Leo looked at her, instantly surprised. "Sixty? Like who?"
Piper shrugged. "Well, there are all the people from P3, friends, Darryl and Dad, Mom..."
"Uh, Mom?" Prue asked her sister. "Piper, I don't really think that you can count her."
"We'll have to if she's going to eat," the male planner, Craig told them.
Prue gave him a small smile. "Oh, trust me, she won't be eating."
Marie checked her notes. "I thought your mother passed on."
Prue made a face at that slip. "Mmm-hmm."
"Right, she did," Piper said quickly. "Um, I just I meant I hope she's there in spirit."
"Oh," the female planner replied. (Sometimes, I hate this job. Geez, the weirdos you meet on occasion...)
"You're right, that doesn't count," Craig said as he crossed out the name on his pad. "Now, have you thought of what kind of hors douvres you'd like by any chance?"
"Pigs in a blanket," Leo suggested, causing Piper to laugh.
"Uh, honey," she said. "I was hoping for something a little bit more elegant."
The phone rang, and Prue decided to use it as a means to get out of this. "I'll get it!" she said, as the oldest sister headed for the kitchen.
"I like pigs in a blanket," the guardian angel then said.
Piper took Leo by the arm. "Excuse us," she told the planners as she dragged him into another room.
"We still need to place the ice sculpture!" Craig called after them.
Once they were out of earshot Piper looked to her fiancé. "What is the matter with you? Why are you doing this?"
"Because this is a disaster waiting to happen, that's why," the whitelighter answers her honestly.
"Oh!" Piper replied heatedly. "Well, keep that up and it will be!"
Leo shook his head. "Piper, I love you, and I want nothing more for you than to have your dream wedding, but you are kidding yourself with this. We don't need wedding planners. We just need us."
"You may not need wedding planners, but I do," Ms. Halliwell told him. "I don't want to have to worry about anything. And therefore, if I have to fight a demon in the morning, I know that the flowers will still be there on time."
"It's not the flowers that I'm worried about," Leo told her. "It's the guests. As in how do we explain everything to them? I mean, a whitelighter marrying a witch is hardly traditional."
"Obviously," Piper said in annoyance.
---
Halliwell Manor Kitchen
The same time
"Okay, Justin, I'll meet you there. Bye," Prue said before hanging up the phone. Before she could go back to join in the planning fun, Xander and Cordelia came home through the back door. "Hey guys, what did the doctor say?"
"They don't know," Xander grumbled. "I can figure out a demonic plot to end the world...but I can't figure out what's going on in my own head? Some days, life just sucks."
"We'll figure it out together, honey," Cordelia told him. "Now get upstairs and get some rest."
"Yeah, sure," Harris told her grouchily as he walked towards the hall.
"They don't know?" Prue asked her sister after Xander had left. "Having blackouts is something that you'd think they would know how to fix!"
"You'd think," Cordelia said with a sigh.
Prue shrugged. "You want to do the spell again to see if something is doing bad mojo on him?"
"Maybe later," Cordelia said as she went back to the door. "I have to go do something first."
"Okay, I'm on my way to meet Justin. I can help after that," Prue told her as they both went in separate directions.
Piper came over to Prue at once. "Okay, tell me the truth. Do you think I'm overdoing it with the wedding stuff?"
"Eh, guys always think women overdo stuff," Prue replied as she grabbed her jacket. "Um, okay, I have to go. Can I have my lipstick back?"
"What lipstick?" Piper asked, confused.
Prue looked at her. "The one that you borrowed last night at the club."
"No..." Piper said in confusion. "Wasn't me."
Prue rolled her eyes. "Right, I must've gotten you confused with 'another' Piper. Okay, you have fun with what's going on here, 'cause it, it looks great. Okay, bye."
---
Crest Hill Cemetery, San Francisco, California.
A while later
Cordelia looked around the old mausoleum. "Cole?" When no one replied, she went deeper down the stairs to the end before trying again. "Cole?" This time, she got an answer.
"Cordelia?" Cole asked as he came into the light. When he saw her alone, the half-breed grinned in delight. "I knew you'd know where to find me-"
Cordelia growled and lashed out with her fist. A solid right nailed the taller man in the jaw, "You son of a bitch!"
"Ah, not quite the reaction I was expecting," Cole said as he shook his head and then held his jaw. "But still..."
"Shut up," Cordelia said, deadly serious. "Are you causing Xander's blackout trouble?"
"Your pesky mortal boyfriend's ill?" Cole asked her. "Sorry, but this is news to me. I haven't really had time to look him up as of late, not that I'd want to of course."
"You're just going to stand there and tell me you're not messing with his head?" Cordelia demanded.
"I haven't done anything to that guy," Cole told her. (Not lately, anyway.) "You can believe me, or not."
"If you're lying to me, Cole, I swear you'll regret it..." the Charmed One said with venom. "And just for the record, whatever you thought was going on between us? Forget it, it's over."
"I don't believe that," Cole replied at once. "You can't deny that deep down, you felt something for me. All those looks and..." He stopped for a moment. "Cordelia. In your heart, you know that a Charmed One can't and won't last with a mortal. You and Harris live in different worlds...and you won't get the whole white picket fence deal with him, however pleasant the fantasy may be."
"And I would with a demon?" Cordelia spat back, suddenly hating herself for flirting way too much with this guy when he was the assistant DA. "Cole, if I ever see you again, I'm gonna do what I should've done a long time ago. Which is vanquish your sorry ass, once and for all!"
Cole just sighed. "Apparently, distance hasn't exactly made the heart grow fonder."
The brunette woman just looked at him in disgust, as she turned to leave.
"Cordelia, wait. Hey!" he called out after her. "Look, I took a huge risk coming out in the open and contacting you. The least you can do is hear me out! I've been hiding this whole time, shimmering from realm to realm to keep the Source from realizing you didn't vanquish my 'sorry ass'. You're the only one who knows I'm still alive-"
"No, I'm not," Cordelia lied. "My sisters know too."
"No they don't, and neither does Leo or Harris," Cole replied, seeing through that one in an instant. "If they did, then you wouldn't be here by yourself." He looked at her with genuine emotion that Cordelia couldn't tell if it was real or not. "I've risked my life for you, Cordelia. My very soul!"
The witch briefly laughed at the soul line. "Trust me, I've seen the damage evil with a soul can do!"
"Damn it," Cole swore. "Cordelia, I've put myself in more danger coming back here than you could possibly imagine! And all because I want to try and figure out how to make this work between us."
"There is no 'us', you dimwit!" Cordelia told him harshly. "All right, I'll admit there was flirting. Probably more than there should have been - and you do have that roguishly handsome Marlboro Man thing going for you as well. But unlike some girls I know...I don't just accept demons because they have an attractive outer shell."
"At least let me try!" Cole pleaded. "I can suppress my demonic half, just like I suppressed my human half before we met. I can be good. You've seen that. And if you know I can, then why can't we be together?"
"Because I'm with someone else, the man that I'm going to marry one day," Cordelia told him bluntly. "I love Xander, not you. Now stay out of our lives! And if I hear of you killing any more innocents, don't think for a second the Power of Three won't vaporize you."
As he watched her walk up the stairs and leave, Cole wound up and threw an energy ball against the wall in sheer fury and frustration. He hated the fact that since he was trying to be good, he couldn't just kill his 'foe' for Cordy's affections. "Well, that didn't go well now, did it?" he asked himself.
---
Mario's Italian Bistro, San Francisco, California.
An hour later
Justin came into the restaurant with a grin on his face. He stopped and asked the hostess where his date was sitting, then stopped a waiter and handed him a fifty. When he reached the secluded booth Prue was in, he just stopped and stared at her. "You look lovely today."
Prue looked up from her water, surprised. "Ah, thanks. And you seem pretty relaxed for a guy who had his car die on him."
"Ah, yes," he said as he picked up her hand and kissed it. "Sorry about that. But not even that could keep me away from a woman like yourself. Plus, it's never a good idea to keep a lady waiting."
Prue looked at him strangely for a moment, wondering what was going on. "Oh, well, that's okay."
As he sat down Justin told her, "You know, I really should sell that old thing but, I don't know, I kind of like having something not so predictable in this day and age. Know what I mean?"
"Right," Prue replied, wondering what happened to the rather dull guy she'd dated last night. "So, you don't think of yourself as predictable?"
"Me?" he asked her. "Hardly."
At that moment the waiter that had been handsomely tipped came over to the booth with an old bottle of wine. "Pardon me. Beringer, private reserve?"
"Yes," Justin said with a smirk as the waiter started to pour. "Thank you."
---
Halliwell Manor Front Steps
The same time
Cordelia rounded the concert wall and headed up the steps, only to see a man waiting at the front door. "Hey, Justin."
The man turned back to her, "Oh hey."
"What are you doing here?" Cordelia asked as she reached the top step.
"Just picking up Prue for lunch," he replied.
Cordelia stopped and looked at him. "Picking her up?" When the man nodded, Cordelia quickly pulled him through the door. "Piper!"
Justin was confused by her urgency. "Is something wrong?"
"Hope not," Cordelia told him as Piper came into the foyer.
"What's up?" the middle child asked.
"Where's Prue?" Cordelia asked.
Piper took notice of Justin and got a strange look. "I don't know. At the restaurant?"
"Supposedly meeting Justin," Cordelia said with a head nod toward the guy.
Justin shook his head. "No, I told her I'd pick her up here."
Piper looked at him. "I thought you called here...she went to meet you there."
"No, no," the man told them. "I was with a client all morning so I couldn't have called."
Piper and Cordelia exchanged worried looks.
---
Mario's Italian Bistro
The same time
'Justin' handed Prue her glass of wine. "And for the lady..."
Prue quickly put her hand up. "Oh, no, no. I have to work this afternoon."
The guy just shrugged. "So your photographs are a little fuzzy. Call it avant-garde."
"Ah..." Prue started to protest but was cut off as her cell phone rang. She moved to answer it, but the fake Justin put his hand on hers, stopping her.
"How important can it be?" he asked her with a smile.
She shrugged and turned off her phone. When Prue saw a weird look on his face she asked, "What?"
"Can I ask you a favor?" he said.
"Sure."
'Justin' looked sympathetic. "Last night when we kissed goodbye, it was, I don't know, not great. That thing about your ex-boyfriend sort of killed the mood."
"Yeah," she conceded. "I guess."
"How about we try it again, see if we can do it a little better?" To convince her he prodded, "Come on. What's the worst that could happen?"
After a few more convincing words, the couple leaned in to kiss. But Prue was quickly wishing she didn't, when the kiss was broken...
And she saw that she was in a new place, dark with some kind of altar. Plus all she could do was talk. "Where the hell am I? I can't move!" Prue said hotly.
"My apologies," 'Justin' said, as he morphed back into Zile.
Dantalian came out from the shadows. After a look at Prue's still form she said to Zile, "It's true. Every bride is beautiful on her wedding day."
"Say what!" Prue demanded in shock and horror.
---
Halliwell Manor Dining Room
The same time
Cordelia had the large city map out over the table and had started scrying for her missing sister. Piper came in lugging the Book of Shadows, "Find her?"
"Not yet," Cordelia said as she held the crystal above the map.
Piper set the book down and groaned, "We're screwed."
"Not yet," her sister told her.
Piper looked up as Leo orbed in on the other side of the table. "Leo, what did you find out?"
"Nothing," her fiancé said sadly.
Cordelia grabbed the crystal and sat back, "Okay, now we're screwed."
Piper looked between the other two. "Nothing on the map, nothing in the Book. Leo, somebody must know something!"
Leo shook his head. "Well, the Elders support your shape-shifting warlock theory, but they can't get a clear read on the situation."
"Wait," Cordelia said. "So Prue's vanished from your radar and something's jamming theirs?"
"Something like that," Leo told her. "But she can't be dead. They'd be able to sense that, no matter how evil is interfering."
"Okay, then what's going on? What are we up against?" Cordelia demanded.
"Something powerful enough to keep us from finding her," Piper sighed.
"Well, you knew as your powers grew, the evils would too," Leo pointed out.
"Well, okay," Piper said. "But so powerful that we can't figure out who they are, let enough how to fight them? That sucks!"
"What we need to figure out is why a warlock wants Prue alive," Leo said as he went next to his future wife.
"Well, it can't just be for her powers," Cordelia reasoned. "I mean, they wouldn't need to keep her alive to get them."
"Unless it's an upper-level warlock, which wants..." Leo thought.
"All of our powers!" Cordelia growled.
"Well if we can't find Prue, maybe we should try the evil side of the problem?" Piper asked.
"Evil..." Cordelia repeated.
"Yeah?" Piper said as her sister got up and grabbed her jacket. "Where are you going?"
"I have a hunch on where to go for that part of it," Cordelia told them. "I'll call if it pans out, you guys keep looking here. Who knows, we might get a break."
---
Dantalian's Lair, the Underworld
A while later
Prue was now out cold and dressed in a black version of a demonic wedding dress. The evil priestess covered her face with a dark veil. She motioned for Zile to come over to the prone form of the Charmed One. "Shall we begin?"
"Of course," Zile told her. "I'm ready."
"I hope so," she told him as the demoness put a hand on each of the couple's foreheads. "In the beginning, you were damned, and through damnation, you found freedom, power, and purpose. As I unite you today, I remind you of those gifts." She moved and tied Zile's and Prue's hands together. "And in your union, may these gifts increase your powers and grow in the service of evil. So be it."
After she was done, Zile asked, "How long before her transformation is complete?"
"Sundown," he was told. "Can you wait that long?"
He just grinned. "For the power of the Charmed Ones? Yes, I can wait a few hours."
Dantalian leaned over him. "Let me be the first to congratulate you." She kissed the warlock briefly and smiled as he quickly froze up the same way Prue had.
"Why?" he demanded.
Dantalian looks at him simply. "Because I'm tired of bestowing great power on others. The Halliwell Book of Shadows is the key to unbelievable power for me. Evil will spread from this sister to the other two, from them to the Book, and once the Book is evil, it'll be mine, and I will be unstoppable!" She shoved him down to the altar next to Prue.
"But know this. I will enjoy killing you all of you," Dantalian said darkly.
---
Crest Hill Cemetery, San Francisco, California.
A while later
Cordelia quickly came down the stairs of the mausoleum. "Cole? Cole? Uh, please, if you can hear me, I..."
Cole shimmered in at once. "And here I was beginning to think I'd never see you again."
"I'm not here because of the 'us' thing," she told him firmly. "I need you to help me and just so we're clear, even if you do, it doesn't change anything between us."
Cole smirked, he couldn't help it when this young woman laid down the law like that. "Well, when you put it that way...I'm listening."
"Prue was taken," she told him. "By a warlock."
"Do you know which one?" Cole asked. "There's kind of a lot of them."
"We think he's a shape-shifter," Cordelia replied. "But the weird thing is, nobody from our side could get a read on where he's hiding her."
Cole was mildly surprised by that. "Well, that doesn't make sense. Warlocks don't have that kind of power. He must be working with somebody that does. Certain dignitaries have the power to shield their activities. Demonic judges, dark priests, anyone who needs privacy for rituals."
"Rituals," Cordelia asked. "What kind of rituals? To accomplish what?"
"It's hard to say. Could be anything," he told her. "They may want your Book. We all want your Book, even I did...well, uh, at first anyway."
Cordelia tried to stay on topic. "Well, how can we find out who wants it now?"
"I could check around, but I'd risk my enemies finding out that I was still alive," he told her. "And I'm sure someone would just love to present my scalp as a trophy in order to curry favor with the higher-ups down there."
"I want my sister back," Cordelia told him simply. "If you can help, then I want ya to do so."
"No matter what the cost?" the half-demon asked.
"I want my sister back," she repeated firmly.
Cole moved closer to her. "I'm doing this for 'you'. Know that."
The witch said nothing. As he backed away the guy added, "You might not hear back from me, someone might get lucky and I'll have to disappear."
Cordy just watched without a word as he shimmered out.
---
Halliwell Manor Living Room
A while later
Leo came over and sat next to Piper, who was looking through the Book confused. "I thought you said there was nothing in the Book."
Piper stopped flipping through the pages. "Well, now there's just a whole bunch of weirdness in it. Look."
Leo looked, and the mystical tome indeed looked darker somehow. Plus, the spell listed on the page Piper had open caused some definite alarm. "Hemlock killing spell? That doesn't belong in there."
"No," Piper agreed, "But it does have possibilities."
"Piper!" Leo looked at her sharply.
"I'm sorry," the witch said after a moment. "I-I don't know what I was..." Before she could finish her sentence, the woman vanished from the couch. As in literally.
"Piper?" Leo called out, concerned.
"In here," her voice replied from the kitchen, amused. "Somehow."
Leo quickly ran into the other room to join her. "You blinked!"
"I did not," Piper told him. "Only warlocks do that."
Leo didn't let up. "Well, Piper, you did it."
Cordelia came through the back door in a hurry. "Hey," she said as the woman saw their looks. "What's going on?"
Leo didn't waste any time. "Your sister's blinking."
Cordelia stopped in her tracks. "I-I'm, I'm sorry, what?"
"Okay, I admit it, it was definitely weird, but it was kinda fun," Piper told her younger sister. "I was in there and I was thinking about the kitchen and then suddenly, boom! Here I was."
"That is so cool," Cordelia figured.
"I know, isn't it?" Piper confirmed.
"Except that it's a warlock's power," Leo told them. "Big not good here."
Cordelia looked at him in annoyance. "So what? They're always trying to get ours, it's about time we got one of theirs!"
Piper grabbed her sister's arm. "Try it, Cordy."
"Okay, what do I do?" Cordelia asked. "Just think?"
Piper nodded, almost giddy. "Think and blink."
Leo could not believe what he was seeing as Cordelia blinked out of the room, then Piper did it again as well.
"Catch us if you can!" Piper called out to him.
It took him a moment to find them again in the sun room. And to the whitelighter's growing horror Cordelia looked like she was getting high on weed. "Have you tried it yet, Leo? It's a real head rush!"
"Do you realize how serious this is?" the guardian angel told them accusingly. "You're blinking, the Book is changing."
Piper shrugged. "Maybe we're blinking because of the Book."
"The Book is changing because of you," he told her. "It's an extension of you, all three of you."
"Huh," Piper thought about it. "I should care about that, but I don't."
Leo didn't know what to do. "This is what I was afraid of. Whoever's got Prue is somehow reaching you too!"
"Okay, Leo," Cordelia told the guy. "I can tell this is really upsetting you and all, but I gotta tell you, I really like this whole think-it-and-it-happens deal. I mean, think of the time we could save not chanting."
"Good point," her sister said to that.
"Piper, Cordelia, you have to fight this!"
At the sound of the doorbell rang, Piper looked back at it. "Or we could answer the door," she said with a grin.
Leo got in front of her. "For Prue's sake, stop."
Piper looked at him coldly. "Don't ever tell me what to do."
"Cordelia, I need your help here," thee man tried to reach the younger sister.
"I am so tired of helping people!" Cordelia replied, bad memories of Sunnydale rearing their ugly head. Especially the stuff with regard to Buffy and Willow, and how her boyfriend had always seemed to prioritize them over her during the bad old days. "It's always me, me, me with them..."
Piper opened the door to find the two wedding planners standing there. "So glad you're home. We have some new floral sketches we'd like you to see," one of them said.
"Now's not really a good time..." Leo tried but was stopped by Piper. "They're welcome to come in, Leo."
Craig opened his folder. "I revisited the dinner menu, Piper, and you are going to be thrilled. I have some dynamic choices that I-"
"I want pigs in blankets," Piper told him suddenly.
Both planners shared a look before laughing. "It's nice to see a bride who still has a sense of humour this close to the big day," Marie commented.
"No," Piper told her. "I want pigs in blankets." She waved her left hand and the male planner suddenly morphed into a live pig, covered in a blue blanket.
As the female planner screamed at the sight of the impossible, Cordelia just laughed. "She seems scared," the youngest Halliwell told her sister.
"I always had her pegged as an ice queen," Piper noted.
"Hey, being one is not that bad sometimes!" Cordelia commented. "But you know what...?"
"Way ahead of you sis," Piper said as she waved her hands and Marie froze in place...and was covered head to toe in two-inch ice. "Now there's a freezing power with kick."
"Have you guys lost your minds?" Leo demanded, as he regained his voice.
"Oh, Leo, get on board or leave the station," Cordelia told him as she rolled her eyes. "Whatever it is, this is fabulous. You can't imagine the freedom, the power..."
Leo kept trying. "Cordelia, that is evil talking. You have to fight it."
Cordy looked over to her big sister, annoyed. "What did you ever see in him anyway?"
"I don't know," Piper admitted. "He is kind of a stick in the mud, isn't he?"
Cordelia smiled. "Oooh, another great idea. May I?"
"Be my guest," Piper told her.
"Alright, think about the Power of Three-" Leo started to say but stopped as he too morphed into something else. An old bucket full of mud, with a long pole coming out from it.
"Look at all the fun we've been missing," Cordelia said, a huge megawatt smile on her face.
Piper nodded. "And this is just the beginning."
They both went into the kitchen to gossip about their new powers for a while. And when they came back to the foyer, Cordelia was holding a huge butcher's knife. She stood over the man turned pig, "Oh, you know, it's your wedding. Shouldn't the first kill be yours?"
Piper shrugged. "This is too easy. It's boring. I want to do something, I don't know...bigger."
"Well, count me in," her sister said.
"You know," Piper thought out loud. "If what's happening to us is happening to Prue..."
Cordelia got it. "The Power of Three can be truly amazing. We have to find her, the things we can do!"
"But first we need to clean house," Piper said as she waved her hand and undid the magic on the two wedding planners. Both man and woman instantly looked at the two witches in pure fear.
"You might want to run now," Cordelia told them.
The two did just that, and Piper laughed as Marie pushed Craig aside to get out the door first. After they burned rubber out of there Cordelia wondered, "What about Mr. Stick in the mud?"
Piper considered it, and then undid that magic as well.
"What happened to Craig and Marie?" Leo asked, looking around confused.
Piper grinned at him. "Oh, they flew right outta here. Scared the hell out of them."
"Right now though, priorities," Cordelia said. "Leo, we need to find Prue."
"Good, Cordelia," he said to that. "Focus on that. It'll help you resist the evil."
Cordelia gave him a sweet smile. "The only thing I'm resisting right now is the desire to rip you to pieces and throw them out in the trash!"
"But if you help us find Prue," Piper told him. "We'll leave you alone...for the moment."
"Oh, puh-lease!" Cordelia suddenly said. She had noticed, as did Piper, as Leo looked up towards the heavens the way he always did when the Elders called him.
Piper swatted his arm. "Yeah, Leo, ignore them. What do they know? They're backing the losing team!"
"Piper, you don't understand. They've revoked my assignment with all three of you," Leo told the duo sadly.
"What?" Piper asked, a little surprised. "They can't do that. We haven't even done anything wrong...yet!"
"Yes you did," he told her. "You gave into evil. You've relinquished your right to a whitelighter. I'm sorry."
"What about Xander? Is he, like, still on your list?" Cordelia instantly asked, shifting her head upwards and staring in the direction of her bedroom.
Leo looked up to his bosses again. Then he looked back at the sisters, "Yes. He's not been affected by what's happened to you guys, so my orders from the Elders are to get him out of here-"
Piper instantly blasted her betrothed with all the power at her command, from both witch and warlock sources - which caused Leo Wyatt to burst into a brilliant collection of blue-white lights.
After the lights had slowly vanished into oblivion, Piper went from sad to happy in an instant. "Oh, too bad, he's gone. But silver lining, we're free!"
"Yes!" Cordelia said, very happy as well.
"No more obeying the rules, considering the consequences, none of that crap!" Piper grinned.
"Time to find Prue and go for broke," Cordelia said excitedly, as she moved for the stairs.
"Now where are you going?" Piper demanded.
Cordelia stopped and waved her hand over her outfit. "Well, I can't wreak havoc dressed like this now, can I?"
"Oh," Piper said with a frown, as she looked over her own outfit. "Good point."
---
Cordelia and Xander's bedroom
A few minutes later
Consciousness came back slowly to Xander Harris. He groggily became aware of a few things. First, he was completely naked, and second some sort of magically floating light gave the room a romantic mood setting. Lastly, he saw that his girlfriend was dressed in a matching set of black and pink bra and panties, as she straddled his groin.
"Wakey-wakey, Xander," Cordelia cooed. "Guess what? I want to play."
"Cordy?" Harris asked, as he got up on his elbows. "Uh, not that I'm complaining here...I mean trust me, I'm not..."
"I can tell!" Cordelia giggled as she looked down.
"But, I took that pill that the doc prescribed and my head is-"
"Oh!" she said. "I forgot about that." She waved her hand over his head, and Xander's sluggishness cleared immediately. "How's that?"
"Good," Xander replied with a mix of gratitude and confusion. "Great, actually. But I thought we didn't have any 'play' time scheduled for today?"
"No big," Cordy waved him off. "I have some time before we go find Prue."
"Prue?" Xander asked at once in concern. "She's missing?"
"Oh, that's so cute!" Cordelia told him with a feral grin. "You want to help. But don't you worry your pretty little head about her, she'll be fine." She leaned in, giving the young man very close-up look at her cleavage. "And right now, I want to have me some fun."
So saying, the former good witch pushed Harris down and started to make out heavily with him. It took all Xander's willpower to get her off of him and say, "Cordy, what's happened to you? You're telling me that Prue's missing, possibly captured by someone evil, and you want to have sex?"
"Like you don't want to!" Cordy griped. "You always want me to do this and that..." She frowned. "But when I get in the mood for a quickie it's all 'no, no, we have to find Prue'. Honestly, Xander!" She pushed him down with one hand. "Piper is looking into where she is...so, we have some time."
"Cordy!"
She sat up, getting upset and mean. "God, what is your problem? Normally by now you'd be raring to go, have me over halfway to Happy Town, but you're acting just like Leo...boring as hell!" Cordelia Halliwell thought for a moment, before a big grin came over her beautiful face. "Oh, wait just a minute. I have the perfect idea how to get you back into the mood for some fun stuff!"
"You do..." Xander trailed off, as his head suddenly felt like a ton of bricks. The man could vaguely see Cordelia's giddy face looking down at him, but then his mind became a lot more...primal in thought and nature.
When his eyes flashed yellow and he got a very big grin to match hers, the woman clapped in joy. "Alright, Hyena Boy is back!"
Xander laughed, a creepy sound that Buffy and Willow would have recognized at once. The one-time Chase woman then leaned back in and started to make out with the re-possessed guy, having unleashing the remnants of something that had been locked away for nearly five years.
Xander went with it, as his hands started tearing at Cordelia's clothing - and fairly soon, the hyena had her as naked as the day she was born. Just as he was about to mount her and claim his territory though, the animalistic version of Xander stopped. Much to Cordy's obvious chagrin.
"Mate," Harris growled, his eyes reflecting desire and yet also confusion. This was the creature he had bonded with, and wanted to impregnate with his seed to bear his pups, but right now she smelled...wrong.
"That's righ - ow!" Cordelia yelled as he bit her lip. She slapped him, and instantly Xander growled at her. "Hey! Good dogs don't bite, Xander!"
She snapped her fingers, and a collar with a chain to the headboard appeared around his neck. As Xander struggled against it with no luck, Cordelia made a small horse riding crop appear in her hand.
"It looks like my little doggy will need some obedience training tonight," the nude brunette said with a very serious look. "And just so you know, baby, I'm sure I'm going to have you doing tricks in no time..."
---
Restfield Cemetery, Sunnydale, California
The same time
The Scooby gang was on patrol tonight, a group outing for once as everyone had some free time.
Things had been quiet lately, ever since Angel and Kennedy had left town. And Spike had dropped off the white hats' radar, having gotten completely fed up with having to scavenge about for his food this way. He wasn't quite ready to quit Sunnydale once and for all, due to his friendship with Dawn and Joyce, but Buffy's continuous and contemptuous rejection of his affections had worn his patience damned thin ever since last year.
Buffy, Giles, and Willow ran towards the sudden sounds of fighting. Then they heard what sounded like gunfire. When they finally got to the far wall of the cemetery, they all stopped dead in their tracks.
"My word," Giles said stunned at the sight.
"Uh, do you have a taller...and more bustier sister, Buffy?" Willow asked her friend, confused.
"Not that I know...hey!" Buffy exclaimed in annoyance.
"Buffy, not now," Giles said as he watched the new woman fighting several vampires and a demon on her own.
She was about six feet tall with blond hair, in a long braid down the back. A tied-up belly shirt was showing a lot of cleavage and there was a leather bomber jacket as well. Buffy was about to go help when the mystery woman threw a vampire away from her with ease, and then whipped out a sawed-off shotgun and blew a hole in the chest of the demon.
The last two vampires tried to gang up on her, but she easily avoided their attacks and staked one in the back. She grabbed the other one by the neck, and twisted it with in human strength. It made a sickening sound as it cracked, and the woman quickly decapitated the enemy with a large K-Bar knife.
"Eww," Buffy said as she saw that. "Demon?" she asked her Watcher.
"I'm honestly not sure..." Giles started, before the woman moved with superhuman speed and had the shotgun level with his face.
"Who the bloody hell are you?" the woman demanded of Giles with a British accent.
"Ah..." Giles stammered. "Rupert Giles," he got out
The woman looked him in the eyes, before she lowered the weapon. "The Watcher."
"You have me at a disadvantage, young lady," Giles said when he was sure the gun was swung back around the woman's back.
"Yeah, who are you?" Buffy demanded as she held her stake ready.
The woman looked at Buffy for a moment, then turned back to Giles. "A stake? That's all she has for a weapon? Damn the Watchers Council and their inability to come out of the Middle Ages..." the femme said as she started to leave.
"Hey!" Buffy called as she grabbed her arm. "You come into my town and don't want to introduce yourself? Some people would call that rude."
"If you bloody well insist on it," the woman sighed, as she easily freed herself. She looked to Giles. "I'm Elsa Bloodstone."
"Bloodstone?" Giles asked, shocked. "Yes...I've heard you've taken over your father's work, but I didn't expect to ever see you on the Hellmouth though."
She looked at him funny. "Please, Mr. Giles. Where else would a demon hunter like me go?"
"Point," Giles conceded. He looked to the choker around her neck. "I take it that, that's the..."
"The Bloodstone," Elsa told him. "Yes it is, and no, I won't let you handle it. I've not met a Watcher yet who plays fair with regard to powerful magical items."
"Giles isn't like the other Watchers we've met in the past!" Willow said, defending him. "He's nice."
"You're the low-power witch?" Elsa asked her casually.
"Low-power?" Willow shrieked. "I have loads of power, lady!"
Elsa nodded to Giles, "Is he doing double duty as your whitelighter as well then?"
"Well, no..." Willow admitted.
"Then I rest my case."
"May I ask why you've come to the Hellmouth at this time?" Giles asked her.
"Shax," Elsa told him. "He was seen here, barely two days ago."
"Shax?" Buffy asked Giles.
"An upper-level demon that works for the Source of All Evil," the shopkeeper told his charge.
"What does he look like?" Buffy asked. "I might have killed him already."
Elsa laughed outright at her. "Trust me. If you had fought Shax, and by some act of God lived, you would know it."
Buffy looked at her, annoyed. "I can slay any vamp or demon I come across-"
"Whatever you say, shrimp," Elsa said disinterestedly before she walked away.
"Shrimp?" Buffy called after her. "Hey! Who the hell are you calling a shrimp?"
---
Cordelia and Xander's bedroom, Halliwell Manor, San Francisco.
Some time later
Xander was laying under the covers unconscious, with the dog collar still tight around his neck. Cordelia was just finishing putting on her robe when Cole shimmered in. And as he took in the sight, the half-human frowned. "So this is what you do for fun now?"
Cordelia didn't even get upset at his showing up, much to Cole's hidden concern. "What can I say, I just felt like playing with my little pet for a while."
"Your pet?" Cole asked in disbelief as he saw the riding crop on the bed. "Well, you're just full of surprises today..."
"What did you find out?" Cordelia asked him in a no-nonsense tone as she went behind the changing screen and started to disrobe.
Cole didn't know what to make of this as he saw the shadow figure take off the robe, "The search for Prue's on the back burner now?"
"Cole," Cordelia said over the screen. "Piper's working on it. Now what did you find out?"
"Well," the half-demon muttered as Cordelia reached out and pulled a pair of jeans off a chair. "If what I've learned is true, then Prue's in serious trouble. She's been forced to marry a warlock."
Cordelia laughed. "Figures that bitch would steal Piper's thunder!"
Cole decided to give up trying to understand this for now. "No, no, you don't understand. A high-level demon priestess named Dantalian is rumoured to have married them." He watched as Cordy pulled on a top and finally came out. "She's got the power to turn Prue evil, and turn you evil too. Which...is what I'm guessing has happened here?" he finally got it with a grimace.
The evil witch came out with a very tight V-neck top, one that showed an indecent amount of cleavage. She came over to him and cupped his face, as Cole stared at that oh-so-tempting face and body. "So? Isn't that the way you want me?"
Cole backed up at once. "No, that is not how I want you. It's not how I want 'us' to be. Cordelia, this isn't the real you. The real Cordelia Halliwell, the woman I love, is a good person. And that's who I want to spend my life with!"
"Oh, the humanity. And love is love, Cole," Cordelia said lazily, as he leaned down and seemed to scratch the sleeping Xander behind the ear.
Despite the weird fetish thing that was going on, Cole was jealous at the sight of Cordy petting that twerp. "There's no such thing as evil love, Cordelia. It's just gratification, lust."
"Well, lust can be fun," Cordelia said with a smirk. "And hey, I learned just how much fun only a few minutes ago!"
"Yeah, well, just my opinion but I think you've had enough fun for today," Cole told her, trying to keep a tight rein on his admittedly short temper.
She looked at the half-demon, amused. "What's the matter, Cole? Upset that you didn't come sooner to play with me and my little doggy?"
"Who, Xander? Well, I don't think he would have liked me present to...play along," the former lawyer said to that. (Hmm. Maybe if I can wake him up and get him alone, somehow manage to explain...we can work together to try to cure Cordelia of this?)
"Oh, come on! That's not even a consideration now that he's housebroken. Trust me, Xander's going to do I whatever I tell him to do from this point on," Cordelia said sexily. Then she got an odd look on her face. "Maybe I can get Oz as a pet as well, to keep him company whenever I'm bored?"
"Cordelia?" Piper said, as she called through the bedroom door. "Are you okay in there?"
Cole instantly got worried. "Dantalian's coming for your Book. You'd better be ready when she does," the guy told her before he shimmered out.
Piper opened the door a moment later. "What's going on in here?"
"Nothing at the moment," Cordelia told her, indicating the unconscious Xander. "The fun's over."
Piper looked at her strangely. "I heard voices."
"Oh, Xander just fell asleep," Cordelia lied to her. "Um, but, I had a premonition!" She ushered her sister out of the room. "We gotta go. This priestess-looking bitch that has Prue, I saw her showing up here..."
---
Halliwell Manor Attic
Twenty minutes later
Dantalian appeared in the darkened room. She looked around, before carefully reaching down to pick up the Book of Shadows. It glowed briefly for a moment, but then stopped and let her pick it up. "That was easy."
"Too easy, bitch," Piper said as she blinked into the center of the room. At the same time Cordelia blinked behind the priestess, and kicked her hard to the floor.
Piper held out a large knife. "Now...where is our sister?"
Dantalian looked up at them, mad that she'd gotten caught. "I can help you. I can teach you evil. You're new at it. You don't know how to realise its full potential."
"I don't know," Piper said. "I think we're getting the hang of it."
Cordelia took the knife from her sister and put it to the demonic woman's neck. "Wanna see?"
"Where's Prue?" Piper demanded again.
Dantalian pushed her threat away. "Kill me and you'll never see her again."
Piper shrugged at her reply. "Hmm, so maybe we should just torture you instead?" She waved her hand and the woman's right arm and hand got turned to ice and stuck to the floor. Dantalian screamed in pain.
When she said nothing coherent though, Cordelia told Piper, "Why don't you just shatter her hand and see what happens?"
Piper grabbed a metal candlestick holder off the table, and held it over the frozen arm. "Last chance," she warned. But again the demoness said nothing.
"Fine." Piper slammed down the metal object and shattered the ice into thousands of pieces.
"YEAGHHHHHH!" Dantalian screamed in mortal agony.
It was music to Cordelia's ears. "You know," she told the demon. "I think we should do the other arm before the legs. What do you think?"
Piper answered the question, "Actually, we could work up, piece by piece all the way to her head."
Cordelia kicked the demon woman. "Where is Prue?"
However, the two evil witches were distracted as Leo orbed into the attic. "Piper, I can't believe you did that! Let me help you, I know we can overcome this..."
Dantalian took the offered opportunity and grabbed the Book with her intact hand, disappearing out of the attic.
"Damn it!" Cordelia yelled at once.
"What's going on?" Leo asked, unsure.
"Well, you just helped her escape, that's what's going on!" Cordelia raged impotently. "God, if only I had some darklighter poison handy!"
Piper was equally pissed off, so next best thing - she turned the whitelighter into a block of ice. "Will you just smash him already?"
"With pleasure," Cordelia growled as she did a powerful kick and smashed Leo into a million pieces. She looked down at the remains and spit on them. "Bastard!"
---
Dantalian's Lair, the Underworld.
A few moments later
The demon priestess was flipping though the Book of Shadows quickly with one hand. "Death alone will not suffice, my dear bride. Not anymore, not after this!" she said coldly to Prue's form.
"Yes!" she called out after she found an appropriate spell. "Welcome to my hell," Dantalian said bitterly.
---
Halliwell Manor, San Francisco, California.
The same time
Piper and Cordelia were storming down the stairs. "So what are we supposed to do now?" the middle sister demanded.
Cordelia frowned. "I don't know. Kill innocents? It's the one of the old standards. Besides, I can't be bothered going back upstairs to screw Xander's brains out right now. I might later, though."
"No," Piper said in annoyance. "I meant about Prue. How are we supposed to find her without the Book?"
The youngest sister smirked at her. "Shouldn't you be mourning the loss of your beloved Leo?"
Piper grabbed her. "I'm serious. That was one pissed-off priestess. And if she kills Prue, she takes the evil Power of Three along with her, and we won't stand a chance."
Cordelia had to agree. "Good point. We have to find Prue." She thought about it. "Wait a minute, we're warlocks now right? We should be able to blink wherever we want."
Piper shook her head. "But we don't know where to blink to."
Cordelia smiled. "We don't have to know where, just 'who'. To Prue. I mean, isn't that how Leo's orbing power worked?"
"Yeah, but his power was jammed," Piper reminded her. "He couldn't find her."
"That's because he was good," Cordelia told her. "And we're evil."
---
Dantalian's Lair, the Underworld.
A moment later
The one-armed priestess was chanting from the Book. "Through this book, weave this spell, create the pain of heaven to hell; may she suffer..." She stopped when Piper and Cordelia suddenly blinked into the room.
"Whoa," Piper said as she steadied herself.
"Are we there yet?" Cordelia demanded a moment before she saw... "Prue!"
"Too late, witches!" Dantalian taunted them. "I've got the Book!"
Piper looked across the room. "How about I just freeze your head and shatter it?"
Dantalian glared at her. "I may not be powerful enough to fight you yet, but they are." And right on cue, Prue and Zile awoke and got up.
"Whoa, Prue, hey, hi," Piper said quickly. "You don't look so good."
"Oh, but that's a great dress..." Cordelia tried. "Oh, who am I kidding? That sucks worse than something that even Cher would wear!"
Dantalian looked to the two newly-awakened beings. "Zile, Prue. Eliminate them."
Piper tried reason. "Prue, ignore her. Come on, come with us. We're your sisters."
"I'm his 'wife', not your sister," Prue replied before she used her powers to send Piper crashing into a stone wall.
"Alright," Piper said as she climbed back up. "I'll take that as a no."
"Okay, we have to figure out a way to get Prue on our side and fast!" Cordelia hissed at her.
Piper smirked, "How about we get her a divorce?"
Zile instantly shape-shifted into a perfect copy of Prue. They both blinked out and then reappeared in different places, confusing the younger Charmed Ones.
"Don't want to shatter the wrong sister, now, do you?" Dantalian laughed.
"I love you," one Prue said to the other.
"Me too," the other replied, as a dagger appeared in the hands of both Prue's.
"Welcome to Planet Narcissus," Piper said, not amused.
Cordelia looked up. "Wait a minute. Cole said that evil can't love."
Piper looked at her sharply. "Cole?"
"Uh, never mind that right now," Cordelia told her hurriedly. "The point is she didn't say, "I love you too"." As the two Prue's advanced, Cordelia pointed to the second Prue. "Uh, she's the warlock. Freeze her!"
Piper complied and the Prue on the right turned into ice just like Leo had.
"No! Zile!" Dantalian shouted, instantly worried.
Piper kicked the frozen Prue and easily shattered her. And as the warlock died, the spell over the magical trio was broken.
Prue looked at her outfit and then her siblings in utter confusion. "What's going on?"
"I think we're back," Cordelia spoke up, looking at her clothes for a moment. "All of us."
Out of the corner of her eye, Piper caught Dantalian making a run for it. With a wave of her hands she froze the demoness in place, and this time there was no ice. "I think the Book is back too."
"The let's go do something good with it," Prue proclaimed, as they walked over to the Book. Piper turned to a vanquishing spell, and they all chanted as one, "Powers of light, magic of right, cast this blight into forever's night."
Dantalian unfroze and screamed, as she got vanquished in a small fireball. Good riddance to her, too.
"Well," Prue said with a sigh, her memories having cleared up. "That was certainly a wedding from hell." She nudged Piper. "Although, I guess I was the first to get married after all, hmm?"
Piper's face fell as the memories came back to her too. "Oh, no. Leo."
"What?" Prue asked, concerned.
"We killed him," Cordelia told her, full of disbelief. Then her face momentarily took on an expression of complete horror, as she recalled all the things she had done to her own man whilst under the influence of evil.
---
Halliwell Manor Attic
A while later
The three women ran into the attic with Piper at the lead. As soon as she saw the spot where Leo had been shattered, the poor woman broke down and started to sob. Nothing was left of the icy remains, for either him or the demoness's arm. "Oh, Leo. I'm sooo sorry!"
Prue and Cordelia heard the sound of orbing, and looked around as a fully intact Leo Wyatt appeared whole and hale. Cordelia grabbed Piper by the shoulder and turned her around to see him.
Piper instantly got up and ran to him. "Oh, thank God you're okay!" the woman said as she held her beloved tightly and cried.
Leo comforted her before he explained, "Actually, it had more to do with what you guys did. Vanquishing Zile broke the bond, and reversed all the evil you had done."
"I just hope the wedding planners don't remember what we did to them," Cordelia muttered, a bit nervous.
"Unfortunately, they will," Leo told her. "But I doubt they'll believe what happened. The state of denial isn't exclusive to Sunnydale, after all."
Piper looked up to him. "But unfortunately, that doesn't extend to you."
Cordelia cringed. "Oh, yeah, Leo, sorry we...killed you."
"It's okay, Cordelia," Leo replied calmly. "That wasn't the real you. Or you, Piper."
"Wasn't it?" Prue asked him. "I mean, on some level it was me. I felt it. They didn't just plant evil inside of me, or us, for that matter. There had to be something there for them to turn to begin with."
"That doesn't make you evil, Prue," their guardian counseled her. "You have to choose to be evil voluntarily."
"Well, I gotta admit it, it was kind of fun."
Piper rolled her eyes. "Cordelia!"
"Well, it was fun for a while!" the youngest Halliwell said. "I mean to be able to do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted, with no consequences."
Piper stopped her at once. "My fiancé getting blown up and also being shattered into a gazillion pieces is kind of a consequence."
"I kinda understand what Cordelia's saying," Prue said.
"Wait, you do?" Cordy asked her oldest sister.
Prue thought about it as she crossed her arms, "All I'm saying is if evil weren't enticing, why would there be any? I mean, you know, to pretend that we're never attracted to it, it's like pretending that it just doesn't exist." She sighed. "Although after all this, I have to admit Justin is kind of boring."
"Well, scratch one name off of the wedding guest list," Leo said trying to keep things light for the moment.
"Actually, scratch 'em all," Piper said, getting a look from Leo. "I cave. Our lives are just way too bizarre to have any sort of normal wedding. I don't know what I was thinking."
Leo kissed the top of her head. "Well, whatever you want. And I think this is one little adventure that Xander will be happy that he missed out on."
Prue shook her head. "He just slept through all this?"
"Ah, not exactly..." Cordelia blushed beet-red. "I...I better go check on him," she mumbled before she ran up the stairs.
---
Cordelia and Xander's bedroom
A few moments later
Xander was still out cold, when the young witch ran into their room.
"Oh, God..." Cordelia muttered. She then quickly yanked off the dog collar in dismay. (Is he ever gonna forgive me for this? God, I hope so!) "Xander? Wake up!"
She slapped him lightly, and instantly Harris was awake and aware of what was going on around him. The pain from the riding crop was still present, but that something more to be ignored than contemplated for the moment.
Because unfortunately, Cordelia had completely forgotten that her boyfriend was still possessed by that Primal hyena spirit, and she let out a small yelp when Xander dragged her underneath him on the bed. "Hey!"
"Mate," the male specimen said, sniffing his girlfriend intensely. And this time, she smelled right to his heightened senses.
"Uh, yeah, but Xander honey..." Cordelia tried to be diplomatic about this, as his naked body pressed down upon hers and she realized her error.
"Breed," Harris said in a no-nonsense tone, focusing on his own priorities. "Now."
(Okay, I don't wanna hurt your feelings here but this is 'so' not the time!) "Xander, just calm down and I'll reverse the-"
"Ready," Hyena Boy said, holding her down and again sniffing at her. Cordelia was instantly stunned to see that Xander really meant it too, from the huge bulge pressing against her crotch. "Fertile. Mate become mother," the former Slayerette then promised her simply.
Now this was unexpected, as Xander's lips found hers and Harris started trying to remove her pants. Cordy was in shock both from his intended actions, and the fact that Xander's hang-ups about being a father one day were obviously missing in action here.
(Am I ready to become a mom, though?) Cordelia thought vaguely to herself, as they writhed together on the bed. (I haven't even finished college yet...and Xander isn't even in his right mind at the moment!)
So she finally pushed him off with an unexpected burst of strength, "Xander, no! Don't!"
The animalistic young man just stared at her. Luckily for all concerned, the hyena had learned from past mistakes and wasn't interested in rape; in his mind, if the mate didn't want to breed with him right now there were other things to occupy his time.
"Feed," Xander said simply, turning around to stare at the bedroom door that led downstairs.
"Let the beast return from whence it came, here and now and in this case. And let my love return to his truer form, plus his prior state of grace," Cordelia chanted the moment Harris was distracted.
Instantly, Xander collapsed on top of the Charmed One as his eyes flashed yellow for an instant. Cordy just groaned and started to move the dead weight off of herself, anticipating quite a lot of groveling to make up for this particular bump in their relationship.
(I just hope he doesn't leave me again for a few months, like he did the last time...)
---
P3 club, San Francisco, California.
Saturday, February 16th 2002
While Xander was behind the bar, the girls were sitting in their little alcove area. "So, please tell me you finally burned that bridal outfit, Prue?" Cordelia asked. "On account of that thing looked terrible on you."
"A demon picked it!" Prue said, defending herself.
"No more demon talk tonight," Piper told them firmly. "I want just one trouble-free evening, comprende?"
"Well, you've just jinxed us completely now, you know," Cordelia told her. "You don't say the D-word if you don't want them to show up like that."
Piper was going to reply but she stopped, when she saw the top of one of Cordelia's shopping bags. "Sexy Slave Girl Costume?" she asked, before the engaged woman pulled out a pair of handcuffs.
"No peeking!" Cordelia quickly demanded as she jumped up, grabbed the cuffs and shoved them back into the bag.
Prue looked at her, very amused, while Piper looked serious. "So, does this have anything to do what you did to Xander while we were evil?"
"What happened?" Prue asked, enjoying the look on Cordelia's face.
"Well, she told me Xander had just fallen back asleep when I went to get her that night," Piper told Prue. "But he was very sore the next day..."
Both sisters looked at Cordelia. "Xander and I are fine now," Cordelia said firmly. "Some things took place during that evening that no power on earth will ever make me talk about, but we're all good here after Xander and I talked last night. In fact, hopefully, our relationship is now even stronger than ever before."
"So, does this mean you guys are finally gonna set a date for the big occasion? Or you'll just skip all the preliminaries, and simply make it a double wedding with Leo and Piper?" Prue wanted to know.
The young woman blushed beet-red just like that night a few days ago, and quickly beat a hasty retreat to the bar - leaving her sisters laughing.
"Guess one good thing came out of the evil time," Prue laughed.
"Oh yeah," Piper giggled. "And we can milk this one for all it's worth, hopefully for at least the next two weeks!"
TBC...