You know, when you get over here all you think about is getting back to the World. But when your time gets near, it sort of scares you because you know in your heart that you're not like the people back home. It's a funny feeling to be afraid to go home, but everyone here feels the same... There are a lot of mixed emotions- worrying about hurting the people close to you, or maybe your dreams about the States will shatter when you get home. And then there's always the way you regret leaving your buddies in this hell hole. We all joke about 'Put your time in,' but in our hearts we wish we could all go home together... -Sgt John "Butch" Hagman
Uncle Jake,
One of the choppers was shot down coming in with replacements, so we're still out here. On the way out, a couple of the choppers took our casualties out. Luckily, they made it out, but now we've been here two more days. I've only gotten a few hours sleep, no more than five. Food is starting to run out and the reinforcements didn't even come with some more C-ration cans. Problem is, we can't even walk out of here because we're in a valley surrounded by the damn gooks. We've had a few more casualties, but no more enemy probes. It's really frustrating. I just want to get out of here. We all do. We haven't shaved since we left two weeks ago, nor bathed, but rain does wash some of the dirt off. Mostly, we've been lying on our stomachs in the mud, so we're never that clean. The damned NVA has us right where they want us. If we weren't so vulnerable, chances are they wouldn't even think to attack us. Gooks aren't too big on confrontation. It's mainly the booby traps that get us, laid out by Charlie.
You know, back in the World you never think it's going to get this bad, you're never going to see action like this. Now that I'm here and I'm in this... there are times it doesn't feel real. Almost like a bad dream. And then the mortars hit a little too close and death whispers in your ear. Uncle Jake, you told me to believe and I'm been trying, I swear I have. But if I don't make it out of here, if you could continue helping my mom and Bernie out. They need you. I'd rest easier knowing you're there with them. Mom especially. Please, Uncle Jake.
Love,
John