From the previous chapter:
Ignoring Georg's ominous demeanour and narrowed eyes, Max said cheerfully, "You're just the man we wanted to see. We have an announcement to make: I am escorting our dear Fraulein to the Ball!"
Chapter 15: Preparations
"In my study, now!" The Captain snapped furiously to Max, then turned to Maria. "You had better come too please, Fraulein" he said stiffly.
Maria's stomach lurched, remembering how he had lost his temper with Louisa. She really didn't think she could face another confrontation, not when she felt so vulnerable over her newly discovered feelings for him.
Her heart was already thudding frantically to be so close to him again. Her heightened senses were painfully aware of everything about him, from the subtle hint of a cologne and the slightly husky timbre of his voice, to the firmness of his jaw, and even the intriguing little scar on his chin. Why did he have to be so ridiculously handsome, she asked herself despairingly.
Astonishingly, Herr Detweiler seemed unconcerned by the Captain's rage despite having spent the better part of the afternoon hiding from him. Now that he had been cornered he seemed to have lost all his instincts for self-preservation. He seemed positively buoyant.
They fell back slightly as the Captain strode ahead. Although there was anger in every line of his body, Maria could not help but notice how he moved with a sleek elegance. It brought to mind the pictures of panthers she had seen in books, with their coiled, barely leashed power.
She was relieved when Herr Detweiler distracted her from her wayward thoughts.
He gave a low chuckle as he murmured wryly to Maria, "This feels like the times I was sent to the headmaster's office."
Maria shushed him, concerned that the Captain would become even more enraged if he heard.
But Herr Detweiler was unrepentant. "Now might be a good time to burst into song Fraulein," he advised jocularly. "It might turn our snarling ferocious tiger into a purring pussycat."
"Herr Detweiler, please!" Maria whispered anxiously, astounded that he seemed so unaware that he was on thin ice with the Captain.
Once inside the study, the Captain closed the door with a decisive click. With his face like thunder he turned to Max.
"So, you intend to accompany Fraulein Maria to the ball. Does this have anything to do with your plans to coerce her into singing in the Festival?"
"As a matter of fact, the ball will be the perfect opportunity to showcase her talents," Max replied as if it were the most genius of ideas and deserved congratulations.
The Captain however was having none of it. He unleashed a furious tirade. Maria winced as he flayed Herr Detweiler with words like exploitation, devious scheming, unscrupulous despicable behaviour, and manipulation.
Herr Detweiler, however, seemed remarkably unruffled, but at least he had the sense to stay silent until the Captain stopped. He spoke placatingly.
"Georg, I assure you I have no wish to exploit our dear Fraulein. I hold her in the highest esteem, you know that."
He ignored Georg's disbelieving snort and continued.
"Fraulein Maria is a very courageous, capable young woman who can rise to meet any challenge. She has an extraordinary voice. Surely she should be allowed to decide what she wants to do with it. Perhaps you should ask her what she wants to do instead of trying decide for her."
The Captain's nostrils flared and his jaw clenched, but he bit back his sharp retort.
As he turned to her, Maria immediately dropped her eyes, afraid he might see what she was probably hopeless at hiding. He spoke with rigid formality.
"Fraulein your welfare is my responsibility. I therefore find it necessary to advise you that you should not feel manipulated into doing anything you are uncomfortable with. Singing at the Festival will be a daunting endeavour that you must consider carefully before committing to it."
Maria took a deep breath, unsure of what to say. Despite his peremptory manner she was touched by his protectiveness.
"Thank you for your concern sir. I do need to think about it some more. It's all a bit overwhelming. I just don't know right now."
A sudden idea came to her. "But if I may, Captain, I would like to seek advice from the Reverend Mother. She is so wise, she always knows what to do."
The Captain nodded curtly. "If that is what you wish I can drive you there and help explain the situation."
"Thank you for your kindness Captain," though in truth he looked anything but kind. "But I really need to speak to her on my own please. There are many things I need to tell her. And there's a bus that will be along shortly," she added hastily. She didn't think she could cope with another car ride with the Captain.
Max hid his amusement as Georg's efforts to gain control over the situation were thwarted. He saw Georg's jaw clench with frustration as Maria left them.
ooooOOOOoooo
"What is it that has brought you here my child? You look troubled."
"Oh Mother, I have so much to tell you and none of it's very good I'm afraid," Maria confessed remorsefully. She knelt and kissed the kindly woman's ring and stayed there penitently with her head bowed.
The Reverend Mother touched her hair, soothing her. "Come Maria. Sit down and tell me everything."
Maria looked up and allowed herself to sink into the infinite compassion of her beloved Mother's eyes, and then the whole story poured out.
The Reverend Mother listened mostly in silence, but occasionally shaking her head with a gentle but exasperated, "Oh Maria."
Maria could barely look into the Reverend Mother's eyes as she told her story, fearing the disappointment she would see there. When she did take a peek, she was baffled to see a benign twinkle there. She must be mistaken about that, Maria decided as she ploughed on, finally coming to an exhausted halt.
The Reverend Mother gave a deep sigh, though she didn't seem angry. In fact she seemed unsurprised that Maria's impulsiveness had once again landed her in trouble.
"You say the Captain didn't fire you, when really it would have most appropriate for him to do so over your deceit?"
"He said he was being lenient for the children's sake."
"I see." She chided Maria gently. "When I sent you out in the world it was so you could see if you have the temperament for the rigours of Abbey life. I think this latest transgression shows that your impulsiveness is going to be a very big obstacle for you to accept the life we have here."
She held her hand up as Maria tried to interrupt. "I do understand that you felt you were trying to right a wrong. I know you have a strong sense of justice and compassion, but you certainly went about it in an inappropriate way."
"Yes, Mother," Maria agreed miserably.
"You have shown remorse already but after we finish here you should have Father Wassner hear your Confession. He will decide on an appropriate penance."
"Yes, Mother."
"If the Captain is willing to let you stay on, you should finish your time there, but you must try much harder to keep out of mischief." Her tone was stern but this time Maria was sure she could see the warmth in her eyes.
Maria's hands twisted anxiously in her lap. "Mother, there's more. The Captain and Herr Detweiler are at loggerheads over me."
Concern immediately flashed in the Reverend Mother's eyes. "Has something happened? Something.." she hesitated "… untoward?"
"Oh no, nothing like that." Maria's cheeks flooded with colour. "It's just that Herr Detweiler wants me to sing in the Festival and the Captain thinks he's trying to exploit me. But Herr Detweiler has been so kind teaching me. I'm just so confused. I don't know what to do."
She went on passionately. "I do love to sing. It feels as if I am rejoicing in God's grace when I lift my voice up to the heavens. But is it vanity and hubris to sing in public?"
She looked beseechingly at the Reverend Mother, desperate for guidance. "Also, Herr Detweiler wants to take me to a grand ball before the Festival, to give me confidence to sing at the Festival. But I've never been to a ball and I couldn't imagine anything more intimidating."
The Reverend Mother went over to the window, her hands folded into her robe as she contemplated. She turned back to Maria.
"Singing is not a sin, Maria. The Lord created us to be instruments with the ability to make music and to sing. But with you, He has truly blessed you with a voice of celestial beauty. Perhaps it is His choice that you share your gifts with others. It may very well be that God has another path in mind for you other than the Abbey."
"That's the other thing Mother," Maria said painfully, tears clogging her throat. "I'm not sure the Abbey is my destiny anymore. I seemed to have failed God in so many ways."
She forced herself to continue. "I… I… have developed… feelings for the Captain." The excruciating embarrassment made the words come out in barely a whisper.
There was a silence as Maria kept her head bowed with shame, but then she felt the comforting warmth of the Reverend Mother's hand on her shoulder.
"Does the Captain share your feelings?" she asked quietly.
"No! No! Well…, I don't know. I'm sure he doesn't, but Eliza thinks he does and there are times he lets his guard down and he looks at me in a way that I can hardly breathe. But mostly he keeps out of my way. And the Baroness has been staying for over a month…."
"Is there reason to believe that the Captain would take advantage of your feelings?"
"Oh no, Mother! You were right – he's a fine, honourable man. Anyway, he doesn't know how I feel and I'll never tell him."
"Maria, the love of a man and woman is holy too. There is no reason to be ashamed of loving someone. You haven't failed God. Indeed, to love fully and wholeheartedly is to glory in God. I do not know if this man will be able to love you in return. It may be that he will become betrothed to the Baroness, but for the moment he has not taken that step. It will require a great deal of strength to go back to his household and carry on as normal, but go back, you must."
She gently squeezed Maria's shoulder to give her courage.
"The decisions about whether to attend the ball and sing at the Festival are entirely yours, Maria. I see nothing inappropriate in either as long as you are comfortable with what will be required, and that you can trust these two gentleman to have your best interests at heart."
She finally smiled openly, and Maria basked in the wisdom and tenderness in her eyes.
"Now go with God, my child. We can talk again when you are ready. Perhaps the Lord's path for you will be clearer then."
ooooOOOOoooo
Maria found the Captain and Herr Detweiler pacing the hallway impatiently like anxious expectant fathers when she returned. It reminded her of the way the Captain had paced around her when she first met him. This time it was Herr Detweiler who was the subject of his infuriated glares.
"Well?" they both demanded when they saw her.
Maria hesitated, feeling as if she were on a precipice. Somehow, she knew that the next step would be so momentous it could either result in her soaring with exhilaration or falling into ignoble disaster. She took a deep breath.
"The Reverend Mother said it would be not be inappropriate if I attend the ball and sing at the Festival. So, I've decided that yes, I would like to do both."
She saw the Captain's chest rise slowly, filling with air, as if he was suppressing strong emotions. Although the look on his face spoke volumes of disapproval he refrained from saying anything.
He nodded abruptly to her and turned to Max. "If this turns out to be a folly for Fraulein Maria, I will have your head," he warned menacingly, before stalking off.
Herr Detweiler looked elated. "I promise you my dear, you will never regret this decision, and I will protect you fully."
Maria sighed, still not sure if she had made the right decision. But there was no going back.
Instead she asked curiously, "Herr Detweiler, why on earth do you keep provoking the Captain like that when he is already livid? Earlier you were hiding from his wrath."
He chuckled gleefully. "Ah my dear, it's because I've just realised that Georg is deeply in love again! Though of course, being Georg, he is fighting it every step of the way. Despite all those medals, this is one battle he is going to lose. It's going to be the most marvellous defeat," he gloated. "I can't help but take a fiendish delight in needling him."
Maria felt the agony twisting inside her at the thought of the Captain being in love. She swallowed hard, feeling on the verge of tears.
"Oh, I see. Of course. I.., I suppose he will be announcing his engagement to the Baroness soon." Through her despair she felt a small prickle of pride that only a hint of the desolation that was sweeping through her came out in her voice.
Herr Detweiler looked at her sympathetically for a moment but remained silent. Then he took her hand and patted it gently with his other hand. "Right, Cinderella, we need to prepare you for your ball."
ooooOOOOoooo
So it was that Maria found herself, over the next days, undergoing intensive training on how to be a lady. While learning all the tedious rules of etiquette she could only sympathise with why Louisa had been so adamant that she did not want to go a finishing school.
The children were ecstatic that their initial lessons on how to be a lady would be put to good use at a ball of all things.
She rarely saw the Captain, which was probably just as well since his bad temper was back with a vengeance. She occasionally saw him glowering from a distance. There had been one further altercation between the three of them. It was over what Maria should sing at the Ball. The Captain had forcefully rejected the idea that she should sing the Austrian national anthem Sie gesegnet ohne Ende [Blessed Without End].
"I forbid it Fraulein. There may be Nazi sympathisers attending the ball who would see it as an act of defiance against the coming new order. It would put you in danger in the future."
Maria however, had been quietly determined. "Captain, you of all people know that there are times when we are called upon to show our devotion and loyalty."
She had not forgotten his commitment to defend Austria against the Third Reich. Once the Festival was over she would do everything in her power to convince him to leave with the children instead.
"I'm a trained soldier Fraulein, it's completely different for me."
"I love Austria too, Captain. What kind of country do we live in where even singing our national anthem is an act of defiance?"
She recalled the sparring they had enjoyed since she arrived at the villa. "Since you find the ancient Greeks so wise you would know that Plato once said: "The price of apathy towards public affairs is to be ruled by evil men.""
Frustrated at her stubbornness he said tersely, "This is not an intellectual game, Fraulein. Naivety can be fatal in these difficult times. We will discuss this further later."
Despite his brusqueness Maria was sure she had seen a grudging admiration in his eyes and it warmed her.
Two days before the ball, Maria walked carefully across the children's room, for the hundredth time. She felt ridiculous with three books perched precariously on her head to curb her naturally exuberant stride. The children were cheering excitedly as the books wobbled but didn't fall. Herr Detweiler watched with complacent pride.
The two little ones were bouncing jubilantly.
Marta twirled joyfully. "Just imagine Fraulein Maria, you might dance with the Prince of Ru… Ru…. of somewhere! It's just like the Cinderella story!"
The books teetered and crashed to the floor as Maria looked aghast at Herr Detweiler.
"What? Royalty? You didn't tell me that Herr Detweiler!"
"Oh didn't I mention it? I thought I did," Max said breezily. "There's nothing to be intimidated about Fraulein. The trick with royalty is to realise they are just human beings. The protocol requires you to curtsey low, don't look them in the eye, don't walk in front of them and only speak when spoken to. That's all there is to it. In any case I doubt any of us will be engaging with the Rumanian Queen and the Crown Prince."
Maria was horrified. Even those simple rules might be hard to remember. She could envisage every possible disaster befalling her in their presence.
"Hallo Father," Liesl said, seeing him at the door. "You've met royalty before haven't you Father? When you were decorated by the Emperor."
The children eagerly asked him to tell them again, though they had heard the story countless times before.
Their father smiled. Although these days he treated Maria with cool detachment and Max with barely restrained annoyance, his warmth to the children was undiminished.
"That was a very, very long time ago."
As the children pleaded with him again, he continued wryly. "The ceremony took place in Schoenbrunn Palace. I walked up to Emperor Franz Josef in the Imperial Hall. Despite his age, he was a very dignified, majestic Emperor. It seemed like a very long walk and I was worried the whole time I would trip over my sword in front of the entire Court."
Right on cue the children giggled as they always did, hanging on his every word.
"I knelt before him as he anointed me with his sword while he said some kind words about serving our Empire. Then he pinned the medal on my uniform, and that was that. I did dance with some princesses at the Ball afterwards, but I only had eyes for the beauty and grace of your mother."
The story always made the children glow with pride and happiness.
He motioned to the children. "Right, I came to tell you that cook has made strudel for your afternoon tea."
The children raced out. Max went too, not one to miss out on one of his favourite things.
The Captain looked at Maria. After being in a nasty temper for days, there was a teasing light in his eyes. He advised her dryly.
"Er, about meeting royalty, Fraulein; you might want to avoid sharing your story with the Queen, the one about your day at the Races, cheering that horse – what was its name – Dover, wasn't it?"
"Thank you Captain, I'll bear that in mind." Maria replied with dignity, but inside she was leaping with delight to glimpse a more light-hearted Captain again.
"And ah, Fraulein, do try to avoid any more half-baked accents, won't you?
"Thank you, Captain, you're full of good advice."
She saw his mouth twitch.
They both turned, startled, as there was a huge commotion downstairs at the front door, with a woman shrieking indignantly.
"You just get your 'ands offa my coat! I ain't moving 'til I see the Cap'n and Maria. They're good friends of mine, they are!"
The Captain turned back to Maria, amused. "I believe you have a visitor, Fraulein."
"Eliza!" Maria clapped her hands together happily and raced downstairs while the Captain followed slowly.
Eliza was engaged in an unseemly tussle with Franz over her bag and coat. For once, the usually unflappable Franz looked flustered and more than a little outraged.
"Captain, this woman had the audacity to use the front door instead of the servants' entrance and she claims she knows you. I've told her that we are not looking for more maids right now and I'm trying to send her on her way."
"That won't be necessary, Franz. I do know this young lady and she is a guest. Please escort her and Fraulein Maria to the drawing room and serve them tea."
For a moment Franz was so taken aback he just stared at the Captain, as if he had gone insane. Then his professional mask slipped over his face once more and he said stiffly, "Very good, sir."
Maria wanted to laugh as Franz escorted them with affronted dignity.
Eliza said in a disdainful whisper to Maria, "That butler is so stuck up, 'e should be the one marrying the Baroness."
Maria hushed Eliza, but it was obvious from the way that Franz stiffened even more that he had heard.
When he left them Maria said, "Oh Eliza, it's so lovely to see you. How is the new job?"
"I can't stay long 'cos I got to get back to me work. Frau Meyer is ever so kind and she don't mind the way I talk, an' all. The thing is, I wanted to encourage you some more to sing at the Festival. I got me first pay and it's so much. I wanted to give it to you so you could buy a pretty frock for the Festival."
"That is so sweet of you. You're such a dear." Maria's eyes filled with tears, she was so touched. "But it's not necessary. I've already decided to sing, and Herr Detweiler is having a dress made for me. I haven't seen it yet."
Eliza hugged her delightedly. "That's wonderful! You'll knock them all dead, you will."
She looked around to make sure they were alone and whispered, "What about the Cap'n? I 'ope 'e 'as declared 'imself to you."
"No, Eliza, you were wrong about that. The Captain doesn't have any feelings for me except exasperation. He's been in a terrible mood for days," Maria whispered back. She could feel the permanent lump of grief in her chest. "I'm expecting he will announce his engagement to the Baroness soon."
"I don't believe it!" Eliza said indignantly. "That can't be!"
"Ah well." Maria smiled sadly, bravely.
Franz came back. Despite his stoic face, Maria was sure he was grinding his teeth as he served them tea. She was amused again as Eliza stuck her little finger out as she sipped her tea from the expensive china.
Then she nearly choked when Eliza said haughtily, as if she were the lady of the manor, "That will be all Franz, you may go now."
Maria kept a straight face until Franz left. He was tight-lipped with fury and offence. "Eliza, really! You're terrible!" she said, laughing.
"Well 'e was so rude to me. Telling me to get out and calling me a dirty girl! But I washed me 'ands and face before I came, I did." Eliza said, crossly.
She put down her cup. "But I best get on me way. As long as you're sure about the money, I might use it to see if I can get me a ticket to the Festival. I'll be the one cheering the loudest."
"Thank you, Eliza, I can't tell you how much your kindness and confidence mean to me." Maria hugged her tightly again and saw her to the door.
She shut the door and leaned back against it, holding her stomach because it was cramping with anxiety at the thought of the ball and the Festival.
Why on earth had she agreed to such things? It would be a calamity.
ooooOOOOoooo
A/N Thank you for the very kind words. They are a real gift.
I'd love to know your thoughts.
I do not own TSOM or MFL.