Author's Note: This one was hard to write. Staying
simulanteously canon to the manga and anime when it came to Maria Ross
was kind of tough. I couldn't mention any of that hug thing in Lab 5
because that was from the anime and so on. It's not too great. Anyway,
hopefully the brotherly part at the beginning makes up for it. Thanks
for reading..! You guys are such nice reviewers. :D
A cry, and fist slammed soundlessly on sweat soaked sheets. A blonde head wrenched back in agony, teeth clenched, hand clawing at said sheets as thought it held back the pain. His back arched a little as the pain ripped through the places where limbs once were, struggling feebly against the urge to scream until it stopped. Another cry, followed by a series of rapid breaths. Sweat beaded on a form fighting with all it had to last in "the war". He was not going to scream, because he knew Alphonse was out in the hall.
He was not going to scream because he knew his brother would get upset.
He was not going to scream because he would know he was losing "the war", and it was one he was going to win even if he had to lie like this in agonized misery until it was over—however long that was.
His chest rose and fell with the rapid breathing. Gold eyes were squeezed shut, brows furrowed. He hardly noticed when Winry changed the cool cloth on his forehead because the magnitude of the pain emanating from where his arm and leg once were was too enormous. He was starting to loathe the machine for doing its job.
After some time, the amount of which he couldn't be certain, the severity decreased. How long had it been? Minutes? Hours? Even after it had stopped—for now—he was still hurting, and his breathing didn't slow up much. He felt hot all over, and sweat had beaded over much of his body.
"There's a fever that often comes with the surgery," Pinako informed from somewhere to his left, almost as though she were capable of reading his mind. "We'll see about the nerves when you're a little better."
"Where's Al?" The voice was choked, as though it had faded from all the screaming he didn't let himself do.
"He's out in the hall still, I expect," said Pinako.
His throat tightened involuntarily at the thought of that suit of armor. "…It's my fault Al has that body… He can't eat, sleep, hurt or feel…" A shaking solitary fist grabbed at the sheets again. "He hates me! He definitely hates me!"
"That's not true," Winry tried to assure.
"Now, now," said Pinako, her voice ever consistently remaining the solid voice of reason. "Al isn't the sort of boy who would hate you. Ask him and you'll see."
"I'm afraid to," he answered, a voice more afraid of asking a question than suffering through automail surgery. "I'm too scared to ask… So I have to get him back to normal as soon as I can…" And something ran quietly down the side of his face, but not because of the pain.
There were always very distinct things Ed didn't like about the military. It wasn't the prospect of having "sold his soul" to the state, however. It was particular things like Colonel Sarcasm's bad habit of racing towards anything female, or Lieutenant Havoc's habit of smoking a meter from you so all the smoke drifted into your face. Maybe it also had something to do with the lousy color of the uniforms (which he thankfully didn't wear because of his alchemist status. There was no way he was dressing up like those ranking military dorks.).
And then there was the fact that they were all adults. He fancied himself to be one, now and then, but such dreams were promptly squashed by the looks he received from the upper military ranks. Or worse yet, the way they avoided telling him things. Edward had to wonder if anyone besides him found things to dislike about the place.
Maria Ross thought the military was great. It was her job of choice, serving the country. She could be a strong woman this way, with her hair cut short and a gun at her side. She could be of service to her country, and she wondered if anyone could dislike such a wonderful job. And then she met Edward and Alphonse.
Edward, with his adolescent disrespect of Colonel Mustang, and his impolite slouching in front of officers of higher ranks. He even palled around with Lt. Colonel Hughes. He had a somewhat slack attitude towards the state, as though it didn't fill him with pride to be helping his country, and he could care less if his friends were ranking officers or regular guys. And somehow, he still held onto his pocket watch.
…a kid like that could be a state alchemist?
And Alphonse, loyally following his brother wherever he went, no matter how far from headquarters. The armor was a tad bit baffling. Fourteen, and he was that tall? But she never really thought about it. Was there some reason that he could stand watching his brother in servitude to a military no child should be able to join? They were in this together somehow.
It didn't matter at first. Edward was some kid in the military. Her life had nothing to do with his. In time, she came to his aid more than once. What? They were orders, and she was following them. Nothing was wrong with that. After awhile it stopped being a matter of orders, and became a matter of caring. Edward was displaced and sometimes irate, and what he really needed was someone to look out for him. In any case, Maria Ross was more than happy to try.
It was raining that day.
Ed went furiously stomping down the hall after having to report back to his superior. Ross encountered Mustang just outside his office not much later.
"That kid needs to learn to control himself," Roy said with a calm voice laced only vaguely with irritation.
Maria smiled sympathetically. "He's just a boy, sir."
"No excuse," mumbled the colonel, fumbling in his pocket for his watch to check the time. "He knew what he was getting into, and I'd kick him right out on his ass if he wasn't such a good alchemist."
Ross doubted that. She couldn't picture anyone having the heart to kick Ed out of the military. To her, it was like a family. Your comrades were your brothers and sisters in the line of duty. In war, you'd die for each other, for your honor, and for your country. It was the warm embrace of the state.
"Taken a liking to Edward Elric?" asked Major Armstrong, one day as he observed the look on her face when Ed tossed her a casual 'hi' and wandered past.
"I guess you could say that," Ross said. "He just seems so—"
"I know what you mean. There's much to love about a promising boy like him."
"Yes. I heard they've never recruited someone so young. It's amazing! What do they use the state alchemists for, though?"
"No one's safe from the threat of war," Armstrong said quietly, and Lieutenant Ross realized she'd never really given much thought to the prospect of using alchemy for warfare. "Not even the young and inexperienced. And I'm afraid it's the young and inexperienced that are often cut the deepest, if you understand, whether they see the battlefield or not…"
Suddenly the military seemed like a cold place to her.