Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot.
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It was the third of July today, and there were so many sales going on. Carol had accepted Daryl's offer of looking for furnishings, and they began the date at his place to have breakfast. Carol offered to buy them breakfast in town, but he didn't want to deal with people this early in the morning. She teased him and reminded him he'd still have to deal with people once they were done, and he agreed, but it wouldn't be as early. Also he had unlimited coffee here, and he was picky about coffee. Carol had noticed, but she didn't say anything about it. It was what it was, and he seemed content with it, so she'd let it be. There were other conversations to be had.
Daryl focused on his coffee instead of the woman at his table, pulling out muffins she'd made late last night for them, and he could only nod as his mouth dried out. He scolded himself and tried to not look at her exposes legs, because it was perfectly normal for someone to wear shorts in this heat. And it was normal for them to couple those shorts with a loose t-shirt with a low V-neck and that was barely tucked into the front of those shorts. She wanted to cool off when the sun came out in full force. That was all. She wasn't doing this for him. He needed to stop.
Do you want banana nut or chocolate chip? Carol motioned between the two muffins. There's more of each flavor in the bag, too.
"I ain't picky." He pushed off the counter and grabbed the chocolate chip, biting into it. Holy shit, those were delicious. They were moist and fluffy. Jesus.
She smiled at his expression. Do you like them?
He nodded to avoid talking with his mouth full. Like them? Hell, I'd stalk your fucking house to steal them while they cooled off. That he kept to himself, because who the hell would want to hear that statement.
Good. She picked up the banana and bit into it.
They ate their breakfast of muffins and bacon—since Spike was left out, and Carol guilted him into making just a couple pieces for him—and they headed out. Spike wanted to come with them, but Daryl couldn't leave him in the hot car all day. That'd be brutal. He promised to take him next time, and he stomped back upstairs, not looking back at them. Carol giggled, and he was ready for whatever hell he'd walk back into tonight.
They went to the local furniture store to check out what they had, Daryl was prepared to have to go into the city to really get anything good, but Carol was optimistic. He went with it and followed her through the store to find items for the newly finished sun room, and he spotted a couple people watching them. He tried not to let it bother hi, but his skin began to itch, and he sank down onto one of the display sets to avoid seeing them.
How about this one? Carol stood behind a dark wicker love seat with a white and brown pattern on the cushion. It's cute. It'll go well with the stained glass. It's lowkey, and it'll make the glass stand out. What do you think about it?
"It's all right. I was thinkin' since it curved, I'd just secure some wicker benches against the walls, maybe leave space for plants or somethin'." He shrugged a shoulder while Carol seemed to love the idea, and he tried not to smile, because he'd look at sun room ideas online to try and impress her for today. It was worth it. He really didn't care, but he did how it looked. "You like that idea?"
It's perfect! We should get a coffee table and maybe a love seat for the all between the two entrances? Or do you want to put something there? Like a window? Or wardrobe?
"Huh, a window wouldn't be bad. It'd bring in more light." He thought about it. "And I know a guy. A big oval window would work. Could built into the walls to make an designed archway for the entrances instead of doors."
That sounds...really cool. How would you do that?
"I know a guy who works with wood. He could come out and see if we'll have to build onto it or just use what's there. I mean, you know patterns, right? Some leaves, maybe? A couple flowers? It does overlook into the woods."
That's perfect. I can't wait to see the finished product. She beamed at him. You're really good at this. Has anybody ever told you that?
"No, it's just me till I moved here and got a dog." He walked over to the bench. "But I appreciate that."
Expect more of that, because I think you're brilliant. You're nothing like how I thought you'd be, and that's a compliment. Truly. I hope you can teach me some of eye of yours. My cottage needs a couple touch ups.
"If you want, I could come and take a look at it."
Her heart skipped a beat. She hadn't let any man into her cottage since she purchased it. If they had sex or dinner at home, it would be at their place. The cottage was a safe place hidden in the woods where nobody would stumble upon it. It had an alarm system and extra locks and dead bolts. It was a haven for her in the middle of a have of a town. She wasn't sure she was ready for that.
She attempted a smile. Maybe one day.
"All right." He nodded. "Why don't we move onto the living room? That couch comes with me, so it needs some stuff."
True. I have a couple ideas in mind, but please offer your opinion. It's your house to sell, and honestly, I want to know what you want.
He chuckled. No, you do not want to know what I want, he thought to himself, checking the price tag to the wicker love seat and tacking it from the total in his account. He saved with the best of this, but this would cost a pretty penny when they were done. He'd get it back in the sell, but damn, it almost physically hurt him. Growing up poor and spending over a ten dollars on something felt a mortal wound. He would never get used to it.
Carol found a nice-looking and reasonably priced living room set, though he did have to get a different color. Carol asked why, and he mentioned how it clashed with the paint, and he also was no fan of this shade of red. It reminded him too much of blood, but he didn't mention this to her. She did eye him when he looked away from it, and she set a hand on his arm. He felt more eyes than affection from the gesture, and he moved on to pick out a better kitchen table since he wasn't so sturdy after Spike and his climbing adventures.
Carol went through and told the saleswoman what he wanted, she nodded and tried to talk to Daryl about it, but he was distracted. Carol handled the sale and insurance on the items, and Daryl dug his card out to pay.
"Would you like to set up a payment plan?" She accepted his card and had more paperwork ready for yes. She had been told the verbiage of this stupid sale all week, so she knew it by heart.
"No, just pay in full."
She gaped. "I—in full?"
Daryl, that's a lot of money. Carol couldn't mask the panic on her face. How out of it was he? He couldn't seriously afford to pay in full right now, could he?
"I know. I worked the price out when we were getting it." He looked from the saleswoman to Carol. "Just ship it to the address Carol gave you by the fifth, please."
"All right." The saleswoman pulled out a large smile and made the largest sale of the season thus far.
Daryl and Carol went next door to get some ice cream to beat the heat, Carol paid for it, despite Daryl already having his card out, and they stepped outside to continue their shopping. Carol was nervous about spending any more money, and Daryl frowned at how thick his milkshake was. He'd have to wait for it melt some.
"You know I sold a house before I bought this one, right?" Daryl studied Carol as they walked down the street. "I sold it for three times its worth."
She nodded, her stomach actually upset from his previous transaction.
"And I've worked at Dales for two years. I save most of my check." Nadia and Dale feed him more often than not, so all he has to do is pay the bills for the house. He rarely uses a lot of gas, so that was mostly it. The power bill didn't get very high, and he only used two rooms in the whole house. Three, if he wanted to watch TV, but he mostly read or went for walks with Spike.
She stopped walking and handed her waffle cone bowl over so she could talk, and he accepted it. I do know that, but that was a lot of money. You didn't even flinch. How can that not bother you?
"I'll get it back once I sell the place, remember?"
She'd forgotten, actually. It made being around him easier, believing that house was his, and she would drop by at any time to hang out with him and her favorite furry friend. It was starting to ache, knowing he would actually be leaving once they were done. And they only had the dining room and the bed rooms left. He would leave those unfurnished, maybe add some nightstands or something like that for effect. She said she'd fill them with something, but he said it was fine. Most people liked to make their rooms their own, and that just cut more time off their time together.
"Besides that wasn't even the most I've spent on furniture." He sat down on a bench, sitting his milkshake beside him and holding up her waffle cone bowl. "This looks good. You should eat it before it melts."
She dropped beside him and accepted it, sucking air in through her nose and peering at him before pulling out a smile and resting the bowl on her knees. The house will look amazing when you're done.
"I hope. Makes sellin' it easier." He squinted at the light in his eyes and turned on the bench to face her, so one of his eyes would be spared the glare. "Speakin' of, do you wanna help me sell it?"
She'd just taken a bit of her ice cream, so she poked herself with her finger.
"Yeah. You know these people, and if they won't buy it, I can sell it in the city. People love a good summer home."
Her smile dried up, but she numbly nodded her head in agreement.
"Think I'll go back to the country," he murmured to himself. "Never liked the city myself."
Oh, so you're a country boy? She teased and smirked at him. That explains the accent and plaid.
He ducked his head and chuckled. "Guess so."
She touched his arm lightly to his his attention, and he raised his head. Where do you plan to go then? Some place South? Or do you have a hometown you'll head back to?
"No, no hometown for me. I...uh, dunno, just gonna go where I go."
Will you ever come back here? To visit? Or see how the house is being treated? She scooped out more ice cream, catching a strawberry slice and chocolate sauce, turning back to him.
He recalled instantly what Dale had asked him back at the shop weeks ago, and he stammered before offering a shrug. "Who can say where I'll end up."
Well, I hope you make it back here one day. It'd be great to see how you again. She couldn't explain the stone resting in her gut, but she tried her damnedest to not let it show. He didn't need to know how she felt about his leaving, and she was the one who walked into this friendship, knowing he'd have to leave one day. She had no one to blame but herself.
He grabbed his shake and tried again to drink it, finding the heat had melted it enough to taste. He was grateful, because it offered up the perfect excuse to not speak. He used it to his advantage as she devoured her ice cream, and even as they moved on to pick out some art for the kitchen, hallways and living room. He had no opinion to offer other than slightly mocking, and Carol told him to hush. She was teasing and laughing again, and he smiled at the sight of it. He liked when she was happy. It made him happy. He'd never known that before. His emotions being tied to another person's, but in rare moments it was...kind of cool. It certainly perked up his own mood.
This is so pretty. Carol stopped by a storefront displaying a piece of artwork from a new up and coming local artist. I like it.
Daryl snorted. "It looks like a dog sat in paint and wiped its ass everywhere." He scoffed at the price. "Spike could make this, and it'd cost less."
She smirked at him. It does not.
"Yeah, keep tellin' yourself that." He shook his head and walked away.
She lingered for a moment before catching up to him, and he offered to cook her dinner. She accepted, and they headed back to his truck. He had to stop by the store for food, and they spent the thirty-minute drive out of town to the super center talking. Carol wanted to know why he flipped houses, and he had no real answer. He was good with his hands, and it involved hardly any people. He liked to be alone, and Carol called bullshit. He could only snort a laugh and roll his eyes, and she made it known that he wasn't alone anymore. And he knew she didn't mean Spike. He tried to seem unphased by this announcement, but the tender smile wasn't a simple battle. Especially when her full smile came out, and he told her to stop.
He picked out a couple steaks to grill for dinner, Carol would prepare the sides and picked out some healthy greens, and he asked if she wanted to get some wine. He hadn't a big wine drinker, but he was an asshole on anything heavier, and he spotted that smirk back on her lips.
"What now?" He stopped the shopping cart and turned to her.
I don't know. Steak, wine. That's pretty romantic, don't you think? She crossed her arms and met his eyes. If you wanted to screw around, I approve of this lead in.
His eyes widened as scarlet burned across his cheeks. He hadn't meant it that way. He just thought she'd want something to drink other than water. Was this romantic? He wasn't very romantic. He just wanted to eat a steak with a potato and sit on the couch to watch the lightening bugs. That was no romance. That was sparing his AC, because it cooled off at night, and he had no cable, so the bugs were something to look at. Jesus, fuck, that was romantic, wasn't it?
She giggled at him and continued down the aisle to pick up some wine, leaving him to grumble and trail after her. They checked out, and Daryl paid this time, grabbing her wrist and spinning her around behind him. She blinked and huffed at him, trying to stop his payment, and they attracted some attention in that process. She didn't care, because she was paying, but he moved his arm to her waist and finished paying. She peered over his shoulder to see approved flashing on the screen and jabbed him lightly in the back with her card. He was too pleased with himself to care.
He drove home, the sun began to set, and they were greeted by an extremely excited Spike. Daryl had brought him a lean piece of meat to make up for leaving, but he could see Spike was fine with it. That, or he was pleased to have tackled Carol completely to the ground and using her as a cushion while he liked her face. She had tried to fight for a moment, but she submitted and let him lick her half to death before running to find his dad.
He's such a strong dog. How do you manage?
"Mostly, I don't." He unloaded the groceries and caught her laughing at him. "He's a big softie, so that helps."
I see. Well, he's lucky to have you. It speaks a lot on someone who takes care of what some might call a pet family. She put the wine and the cold items in the fridge.
"You got any pets?" He balled up the bags. "You work at the pet store, so you'd have easy access."
I want to get a pet one day, but I don't have any space right now. Probably if I ever own a pet, it'll be after I...have kids or something. She didn't to mention her plan to have a child should Shawn say yes, because that was an interesting conversation. Interesting and could be seen a pathetic. She hadn't even told Michonne about it. She figured she'd wait until she had an answer.
He flattened the bags in his hands. "You gettin' any closer to settlin' down?"
Did he talk to Shawn? Why would he ask that? She tried to play it cool and shook her head, but inside was worried he might know something. Only Shawn knew at the moment, and after him, she hoped only his parents, Michonne, and her doctor. She would let everyone else guess what how she got pregnant, because it was none of their business, and she didn't need that going around for her kid to hear one day. She didn't want anybody else involved. She'd have Shawn sign his rights away, so it was just her baby. Of course the Greenes were more than welcome to be involved. It would be their grandchild. If he said yes.
"You want a lot of kids?" He tucked the bags into a drawer to use for when he took Spike out for walks.
Just one or two would be fine. I suppose I'll have to talk it over with the father when that day comes. She didn't want this to continue, because it felt like lying, and she didn't want to lie to him. What about you? Do you want kids? I know you don't want to be in love and have a relationship, but what about kids? It could happen without marriage.
"No kids. I'm good with my nephew."
She nodded. That's a shame. I bet you'd make a good dad.
"More of your accuracy reading?" He leaned against the counter with his arms crossed.
Maybe.
"Well, I hate to disappoint, but women and me don't mix, so no kids in my future, save for my nephew."
Are you gay? She met his eyes as he gaped at her. Maybe you don't like sex? But you put yourself through it because the woman you're with wants it, and that's why the relationship fails?
"I'm not gay." He sounded defensive, and he knew he wasn't gay, but he was to quick to deny it. "And I like sex. A lot, okay? And chicks."
My bad. She held her hands up in a gesture of peace. I was just giving you options. I get relationships aren't for everyone, and that's fine. I wondered if it might be more. I didn't mean to offend you.
"You didn't—and being gay isn't offensive. It's just inaccurate in this situation." He cleared his throat. "Why are we even talking about this?"
You asked me about kids and relationships, so I asked you. That's kind of questions work. It's not all one-sided.
"Tssh, then I won't ask anymore."
How will you get to know me then? She cocked her head to the side. Do you even want to know me?
"You're here, aren't you?" He searched her eyes and whispered it, not that the volume mattered. Maybe he didn't want to hear himself say it. He was protecting himself from the truth. He had a relationship here. He liked this relationship, and it wasn't just between them. It was Dale and Nadia. It was with Tara and Denise. Rick. To anyone who came into the store and talked to him daily. He had inadvertently made a challenge out of leaving this town, and it was apparent to him now. He wished it wasn't, because he couldn't stay. He refused to stay.
She smiled lovingly at him. I am here—for you and for us. I'll start the grill for you. She clapped her hands and Spike went with her to fire up the grill.
He couldn't tell her why he couldn't just stay and be here, maybe try and be with her, because it wasn't something he liked to think about. She kept pushing every fucking day, and she didn't mean to. He knew that. She wanted to get to know him, but it was starting to work. There was something about her, and it got under his skin. Not in the annoying way of people he used to know, but in a soothing way. Like if he told her every awful thing he'd ever done or that had happened to him, she'd understand and take his side without question. She would stand by him and support him, and maybe he would overcome it, but he'd live with this for so long, how did he overcome? And just to leave this place and her?
No, no, it wasn't worth it. He had been here before, and he'd been dead wrong. The cost was high, and he couldn't go through it again. He knew Carol meant well. She was one of the best people he knew, but he would ruin her. She was happy and caring and kind, and he wasn't the type of person who deserved a woman like her. She overcame her past and her struggles and was helping others to do the same. He couldn't take that from her, but he would. Somehow, some way, he would take it. Like he seemed to take everything from the world and from himself. It was no wonder he never saw his nephew for longer than a weekend. He couldn't blame anybody for that but himself.
He dropped his eyes to the floor and exhaled slowly, but the mood had settled over his soul. It wasn't going to be lifted simply because he wanted it gone. He would stick it out and sleep until it was gone. If he couldn't sleep, he'd drink. That always made him sleep, even if the dreams weren't pleasant. It wasn't like any of his memories were anyhow.
It was around nine when they'd finally gotten to eat. Carol noticed Daryl had fallen into a dark place, even Spike couldn't draw him out of that mood, and they made dinner separately. Spike went back and forth, clearly disturbed by his dad's foul mood, and Carol offered him some cheese and told him it'd be okay. They cooked and brought their pieces of the meal together, and they sat outside with the wine and Spike and the night air. They didn't say anything as they dug in, though Daryl seemed to pick at his meal, and Carol could only be silent for so long.
Daryl jolted when knuckles touched his arm, pressing in carefully, and he looked over at Carol, frowning. "What the hell are you doing?"
She added more pressure.
"Stop." He grasped her wrist. "What is it?"
She pulled her wrist free and did it again.
"Okay, stop." He caught her wrist and moved it away from his body but still held it. "If you won't talk then stop."
Exactly, she mouthed at him.
"You can't wiggle your fingers and fix it, so I'm not going to talk about it." He dropped her hand. "You can help me fix this house up, but you can't fix me."
I know I can't fix you, only you can do that. She set her plate beside them on the porch, not worry as Spike had finished his steak and was working on the bone. I just want you to trust me. You've been willingly alone for two years, and that breaks my heart. I know you can't want that, no matter what you say. I know you have to hate being alone. I can see it in your eyes right now, because it's the same look I get when I see myself in the mirror after a bad day. But we didn't have a day. We had fun today. We laughed. We got to spend time together. I got to know you, so talk to me. Please?
"It's nothing talking can help, all right? Just drop it."
I won't drop it, because it's bothering you. Talk to me. I know I push a lot, but it's only because I care. You clearly can't work this out yourself, so trust me. I know how bad life can get—
"You don't know anything about me," he cut her off. "You know the same limited crap Dale knows. Maybe a little more, but ultimately you don't know what I've been through. You don't know my life. You can't just sit there and say it'll get better when I've been trying make it better since I was six years old. It doesn't get much better than this, and that's through all the bullshit therapy and pills I've been through. It's pointless."
If you're going in with an attitude like that, of course you won't benefit from it. You need to change your outlook and step out of your comfort zone. It can takes years—
"I don't want to change," he snapped. "I've been changin' myself since I was kid, and there's nobody to please. It's all the same shit. People are lairs. They use you. If you're lucky, you get to walk away with the same number of scars as you went in with. If you're not, it's a fucking nightmare. You might not even walk away from it all. Like my... Ugh! You just don't understand what I'm talking about. You live in this stupid little town in a bubble and nothing bad ever happens expect that you got broken up with.
"But the world isn't like this tranquil little hole. It's fucked up, full of users and abusers. Full of people who want what's best for you for them, and it's the same cycle. There is no good end of the deal. You just have to keep to yourself, because you won't get screwed over that way. It's honestly the only way." He scoffed. "People aren't worth changin' for 'cause it's never enough. And it's never for your own good. It's how they can profit off your changes or how changin' you makes them feel good about themselves. I'm not here to make someone else feel good about their shitty ass past. Never asked to be."
She stood up, Daryl lifted his head and instantly realized what he'd said, his lips parting to try and apologize at the tears in her eyes, and she glared down at him.
You think I don't know what the world is like? Really? Do you think that? she demanded, signing faster with each word, and he tried to ask her to slow down, but she was furious. Because let me tell you of the world I grew up in. My parents were okay people, but they weren't good judges of character. They left me alone with a negligent babysitter, and so many times I was left starving. They worked all the time to support our bills, so they didn't notice. Hell, my mother complimented my figure when I was fifteen. I had an eating disorder at that point, because the babysitter harassed me when I asked about eating. She used to mock my weight and said I was eating good enough as I was. It started when I was ten, and it ended when I was twenty-seven.
And I wasn't always deaf, you know. I used to be able to hear and speak just like you. I spent fifteen years in the hearing world, and now here I am. With you and your dog. Listening to you cry about the world without ever thinking other people have lived in that same world, too. You need to grow up, Daryl, because I've been in the world. I lived in it. I lost myself in it, and then I lost my hearing to it. Now... now I'm in a place where I can be happy, and you're trying to tell me all my work is bullshit? She was panting with how upset she was with him, and he hadn't said anything, only stared up at her, and she walked away.
"Hey, wait." He caught up to her in the kitchen. "Wait."
She set down the glass of water she'd made herself and eyed him. Why would I wait?
"I'm sorry. I didn't..." He sighed and stepped closer to her. "I never meant to go off on you. I know you're not like them. For the first time someone actually cares and is willing to put up with me... I just don't know how to feel about it. Or you. Or this. I'm trying. I really am."
I know you're trying, but you have no right to blow up on me. I have been through some shit, too. Her eyes burned into his face. You don't get to say fuck the world without thinking about the other people in it who have suffered, too. You are valid in your pain and your past, but you're an asshole for assuming someone who isn't miserable hasn't experienced anguish, too.
"I... I'm real sorry. I just don't know what to do with you."
Her brows knitted together. What does that mean?
"The only women in my life are either with me for something I have or...are Nadia and Tara. I don't know how to have this relationship with you. I don't think I'm doing it right."
What do you mean? How can you not do a friendship right? Aside from our relationship consisting of mostly fights. She searched his eyes and saw a conflict there. You can talk to me.
"I like you," he admitted.
I like you, too. I thought I made that apparent. She was smiling, amused, and he wasn't. She frowned then and realized what he meant. She blushed and stepped back. Oh.
"I... I didn't mean to start likin' you this way. I just did all of a sudden, and I do want to be friends. I just don't know how to do that. I'm angry, probably naturally, and I don't like people. I don't like talking. I don't like a lot of things, but I like them with you... only with you." He exhaled. "You make me happy, and I ain't ever had that before, save for my dog. But it ain't exactly the same."
She swallowed and picked up the glass of water to drink it.
"I don't want a relationship, though, so don't worry about that. I do want your help with this place still, and I want to be your friend. I just...figure out how to do that with this feelin'." He knotted his fingers together then let his hands fall to his sides. "I'm leavin' once this place is done, so you don't have to try and make me a better person. We can just fix it up, and that's that. I think it's better that way. I don't want to hurt you anymore."
She set the glass down and wiped at the moisture on her face before meeting his eyes. You don't need me to make you a better person, and you're not naturally angry. You just think you are, so you act like it. You need to learn to let go of emotions, not people. I... I'll help you with the house still, but I have one request.
"I won't act on the feelin'," he assured her. "It'll pass."
All right. That's good to know, but that wasn't my request. She smirked at him, and he narrowed his eyes. Come with me to the BBQ tomorrow. It'll be the only time you experience it, right? So come with me. I won't ask anything else from you, and it can be an apology for "hurting me".
He nodded. "All right, but I'm gonna complain the whole time."
No, you won't.
He chuckled at her confidence then set his face to ask, "How did it happen?"
I'd rather not talk about it. She shook her head. I'd say maybe one day, but...you're leaving, no matter what?
"No matter what," he confirmed.
Then...I guess you'll never know. She looked out the kitchen window. Let's take a walk. It's such a nice night.
"Yeah, that'd be great. Just gotta clean up the plates."
If Spike hasn't gotten there first, she commented.
"Right."
Luckily Spike hadn't gotten to their plates or drinks, he was still gnawing on the bone to his own steak, and Daryl took it from him as it was now a choking hazard, letting him have an actual dog bone of his teeth and breath. He settled onto the couch with it, and Daryl met Carol outside. They walked the same trial he took Spike on when he got home from work, and they didn't talk much, simply enjoyed the scents of the night and each other's company. Daryl apologized again, and Carol told him she'd forgiven him, but only one this last time. He smiled and said that'd be enough.
– – –
In the morning Carol picked up Daryl for the BBQ, he insisted Spike had to come with him, and Carol said it'd be fine. Other people brought dogs, and he groaned when that wasn't enough to get him out of this. He'd agreed, but the complaining started now. She laughed at him and drove them to Tara's. She'd offered to come early and help set up.
Unfortunately for Daryl, Carol wasn't the only one to come early and help set up. There had to be twenty people there already, and Carol was hauled off to the kitchen to assist with setting up the tables. Daryl wanted to back out, but Dale was there and spotted him. He put him to work immediately, like he was back at the store, and the morning quickly faded into afternoon. Food began to pop up on the tables outside, bug repellents were everywhere, and dogs and kids began to fill the backyard.
Daryl hung up some lights with Dale for when the sunset, Enid and Noah were playing with the animals and other kids, and he spotted Carl and Andre joining them. He saw Carol and Michonne greet each other and Rick approached to try and break the ice. He almost slipped on the ladder, and Dale told him to keep his eyes on the lights. He finished up with them and stepped off the ladder, seeing Dale's smirk, and he walked off to find a beer. Any beer.
Tara caught him and asked him to lend her a hand with the grill, and he could see Carol and Rick talking just inside the kitchen, but mostly he saw the beer Rick had brought with him. He heaved a sigh and turned to lend her his hands since he clearly could have nothing more to do here.
It took about thirty minutes with this task since Tara hadn't brought the bad boy out since last forth. Daryl told her some tips on how to take care of the damn thing, and Tara thanked him, a look in her eye telling him she already knew this and didn't need help, and he decided to ignore that. He couldn't acknowledge it, or he'd just leave, so he ignored it and finished up the task. He ditched out the moment he could to get anything to drink at this point and found Carol looking bumped in the kitchen. He was tempted to drink out of the bathroom sink, but he didn't like seeing her in this shape, so he leaned against the island once he'd closed the space between them.
"Hey, the pie's gettin' you down?"
No, I'm a little tired, is all. I didn't get much sleep last night. I had to help make a dish, and I forgot. So, by the time I got home from your place, it was about two in the morning, and I had to bake. I... could seriously pass out right now. A sloppy, sleepy grin crossed her face, and it was adorable.
He really wanted to kiss her then, but he leaned back. "Let me make you a coffee."
I've had three cups. It's not working. She gestured to the new pot brewing. I used a huge ass cup with a lot of sugar and cream. I'm dying.
"Nah, I meant a Dixon coffee. You'll never sleep again." He moved her aside, she laughed at his fingers brushing her ribs, and she sat down at the island. "Just try and stay awake till I'm done."
She tapped her hands on the island when he turned his back to her, and he looked over his shoulder. How do you even know Tara has the ingredients?
"Have you seen this kitchen?" He gestured to all the dishes steadily covering every surface. "She has everythin' in here for this cook out. I think we're good to go."
She smiled. Continue, please.
He threw it together without giving anything away as Carol watched him closely, moving from coffee maker to blender, tossing in seemingly randoms ingredients. She was tempted to get off the stool and see what the hell he was going to make her drink, and he used his broad shoulders to keep her eyes off the almost finished product. She was growing impatient and almost climbed over the counter to see what was going on when he dropped a cup in front of her.
It's cold? She iced the coffee-colored drink, drizzled with chocolate and topped in whipped cream.
"It's hot as the devil's arm pit with that oven on, so yeah." He helped himself to the leftovers. "Cheers."
Carol reached over and caught his glass before he could drink it and held a finger up.
"What?"
Is this thing even safe? Do you honestly know?
He laughed. "Carol, it's coffee, milk, Oreos and whipped cream. I think it's fine."
That's all? That's a milkshake. She sucked down half of it through the straw. It was really good, but there was a strong after taste that kind of killed it. She licked whipped cream from her lip and met his eyes.
"Also some espresso powder I sold Tara last week." He grinned at her and drank his.
Once the espresso kicked in, Carol was like road runner, and Tara had to ask her to sit down, but she was too hyped up. The cookout bad begun about an hour ago, and she as just blazing through it, cleaning messes and playing with the kids. Daryl sat on the deck and chuckled under his breath at her, and Michonne tried to calm her down, but it didn't do anything. She was like a fast, lean, cleaning machine, and the kids had a blast playing with her. Even the dogs loved it. Spike especially, but he was half in love with the woman already, so it was no surprise.
Then about two hours in the Dixon coffee wore off, and Carol crashed hard. Michonne sat down with her and tried to ask what the hell happened, but her hands were shaking from the crash. She just curled up in the living room in the corner and possibly fell asleep. She hadn't moved in a good ten minutes, and Daryl would let her sleep if she needed it.
Daryl had avoided people for the first couple of hours but Denise pulled him off the deck to meet some people. Some people turned into every fucking human at the party, and he tried to escape with an actual excuse of checking on Carol, but Denise ditched him to do it. He didn't want this at all, and he wished he had someone to check on him, but he decided to tough it out. They weren't so terrible, and it was kinda nice to talk to someone else. He liked Carol in many ways, but there was only so much they could talk about.
Daryl hung out with a guy name Shawn, and Spike hung around with them. Daryl liked the man. He was interested in business and crops, and Daryl had a feeling this was Hershel's boy, but he didn't want to ask and ruin the conversation. He made that mistake once, and he left standing alone. He didn't care then, but Shawn held an interesting conversation, so he kept it to himself. He'd ask Carol later, but for now, he cracked open his second beer and asked Shawn about the farm he worked on.
The kids lined up to fill their plates, Daryl figured it was time to look in on Carol himself, and he found her rousing in the corner with a cup of tea on the floor beside her. He moved the cup and plopped down between her and the couch, leaving her slouched against the wall. He inhaled deeply and closed his eyes, seeing how this could be cozy. He just needed a pillow, a chiropractor for in the morning, and it'd be perfect.
Carol gripped her head, moaning softly and looking around in front of her. She saw people walking in and out through a backdoor, and she frowned, knowing Daryl's house didn't look like this, neither did her cottage. She could smell food cooking and remembered the cookout. She pulled her legs in tighter and groaned, a pulsing in the back of her head and eyes, and she wanted to crawl into a hole and die. She didn't have the energy to go out there and talk to people. She felt almost hungover. If she saw Daryl, he was going to be slapped.
"Hey." Daryl nudged her side with his elbow, holding out the cup of tea Denise likely left her.
She raised her head and glared at him. Don't talk to me.
He couldn't help the small smile. "Here. It'll help with the headache."
She accepted the tea and gripped the handle, moving her hand to his upraised knees and tracing out: Evil.
"It wasn't that bad." He snickered. "You just gotta get used to the crash."
NO, she spelled out and brought cup to her lips to drink.
He rubbed his jaw and sat with her while she recovered, sipping the tea and rubbing the head of her head. He shifted uneasily when she moaned softly at rubbing a spot on her head, and she seemed to notice, because she dropped her hand and downed the rest of the tea. She stood up and put it back in the sink, and he walked outside with her.
Most everyone was eating and chatting, so Carol and Daryl made themselves some plates and sat in the grass in the shade. There were places inside, but Carol wanted to be outside with her friends and family, and Daryl wasn't going to stranded alone with people he didn't want to talk to. Although he did need to talk to Tara and Rick before he went home. There was a high probability of running into them tomorrow on his shift, but he'd rather do it now.
Denise brought out some chairs for Carol and Daryl to join them at the table, and Carol took off like a shot for a chair by Shawn and Annette. Daryl would have stayed, but Denise put effort into having them join the rest of the group and sat down beside Hershel, offering a nod as a way of greeting.
"Here." Shawn handed a packet of wet wipes to Carol. "You'll probably need to carry these on your own one day."
She didn't know what he meant by that but accepted them. She would need them to clean her fingers after eating Michonne's ribs and Hershel's chicken wings. They were the best part of the entire cookout. She didn't care about the steak or the burgers or anything else but these two main items. She balanced it out with veggies and a jog in the morning, but she was going to pig out. She was so hungry. She didn't even have breakfast, so her stomach was ready.
"How are things coming?" Hershel asked Daryl, passing down the salad bowl and seeing it'd been mostly ignored. He tried not to laugh, because Jeanette always made the salad and always returned with more than she brought. It was a running joke. He knew Maggie and Beth had brought bags of salad to add into the bowls when they were kids, and he'd heard them talking this morning. It was good to see some things didn't change.
"Comin'?" Daryl shook his head for bowl since his hands were covered in hot sauce.
"At the house? The one you're renovating?"
"Oh." He nodded. "Yeah, it's coming along good. Carol's been a big help, too. We're gettin' furniture in tomorrow, and I think after I replace the flooring in the upstairs, I'll be just about done."
Shawn glanced at Carol, but she wasn't watching the conversation. He knew Daryl leaving would be difficult for her. She'd been a mess when Maggie left for college, because they used to be so close, but she was happy. She was proud, but with Daryl, he was moving to run away, and they all knew it. It would just hurt her, and Shawn wished they hadn't even met. He hated to see people hurt her. She was such a good person. She deserved better.
"But I might stick around a bit longer. Spike's got some shots comin' up, and you're good with him," Daryl added. "And I still haven't looked at the shed. It's probably gonna need to be replaced entirely, but I can't say. I'll have to see."
Hershel smiled. "It's good that you're sticking around a bit. Does that mean you have a date set for when you'll leave?"
"Nah." He shook his head. "Just...probably at the end of summer, if I did."
What's at the end of summer? Carol looked from Hershel to Daryl, having missed most of the conversation while shoving food into her mouth.
Daryl was about to answer but snorted at the smear of BBQ sauce on her cheek. She looked like a little kid, so unaware and innocent. It was cute. "You got a little sauce on your face." He waved a finger over his cheek were it was on hers.
She blushed and wiped her cheek off, looking to Shawn to see if she'd gotten it off, and he offered a thumbs up before biting into his burger. She picked up her glass and waited for an answer to her earlier question.
"Spike's shots," Hershel answered before Daryl could. "But that's not something we really want to talk about. How are you two doing? You came together, didn't you?"
"Yeah." Daryl nodded. "I just didn't know where Tara lived."
I also wanted to eat myself into a food coma and have someone drive me home this year that isn't Shawn. She had so many embarrassing stories of that. If it wasn't Shawn, it was Rick, and that was too distressing to think about, so she'd chosen the safe option. Daryl would have to take her back to his place, but that was fine, too. Shawn and Rick dropped Carol off at Michonne's in the past. She'd just change and head into work from his place. She had spare clothes in the trunk of her car for a rest.
"Aww, but the memories." Shawn set a hand over his heart. "You've almost thrown up on me twice."
I thought I'd spare you the horror. She smiled sheepishly, a faint blush crossing her cheeks at all the times before. Michonne somehow was never around to see her in that state. She probably fled with Andre, who was in his own food coma.
"It wasn't horror." Shawn corrected. "It was suspense. You never knew." Then he'd hear her throwing up in the bathroom after she woke up. That was also the year of the bad chicken salad. He also threw up, but in her flower garden. She never let that go.
"Y'all are close then?" Daryl tried the other foods on his plate, not sure how he felt about the green casserole, but it had a nice kick to it. It kept drawing him back in.
"Yeah, we're close." Shawn nodded with a small smile.
Carol beamed at him. We only got close through his middle sister. We met first, and Shawn and I just kinda clicked. We've been friends for almost as long as I've lived here. I trust him more than any other man. Well, almost. There are some exceptions.
Daryl swallowed and offered a tight-lipped smile. "That's...nice."
"It is." Shawn drank from his cup. "Carol's like third sister I didn't ask for, but here we are, and I love her, so I'm SOL."
"So, y'all never dated?"
Shawn and Carol exchanged a look, Carol pointed at him as if to ask, Seriously? Me and him?, and Shawn smacked her finger. They shared an amused laughed, and Shawn assured him they weren't interested in each other like that. He loved her, but it was just like he loved Maggie and Beth. Daryl seemed to relax at the news, and Hershel noticed.
"Hey, come take a walk with me." Shawn set a hand down on Carol's hand. "Work off some dinner before dessert."
She nodded and headed out with him, tossing back at Daryl, I'll be back in a ten minutes, okay?
"Take your time." He offered a brief wave goodbye and returned to his meal, hearing Hershel chuckle beside him. "What?"
"Of all the people in town, I never thought it'd be Carol who brought you out of your shell." He could hardly contain his amusement at the situation. "I also didn't think she was your type."
Daryl glowered at the old man, though the streaks of rogue along his neck and ears told a different stores. "I got no clue what you're talkin' about, but I'm certain you're wrong."
"Daryl, I've known you since you brought Spike in for his first set of shots. You aren't foolin' me, son." He studied his face as his eyes lost their glower and fell entirely. "I don't need you to admit anything, but if you aren't going to reconsider your leaving then I'll ask you to keep your distance. Life will continue on once you leave, and Carol will move on, but only if you keep this to yourself."
He resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "And if she already knows?"
"Then...you might a crueler man than I pegged you for."
Daryl tensed as soon as the world left the older man's lips, his hand shook around the glass he was grasping, and he cut a disbelieving look at Hershel. "What?"
"If you cared about her at all, you would either stay or you wouldn't have told her how you felt, because you know it won't work out and are going to leave regardless. What, did you think telling her was a good choice? You're still leaving, likely at the end of summer." His lips drew a disapproving line. "I know you value honesty, but that wasn't the right move to make."
"You don't know shit." He stood up and walked away, calling to Spike as he entered the house. He brought them over to the couch, Tara said it'd be fine if he got onto the couch, and Daryl sat down, rubbing his head while his mind thought over what Hershel said.
Meanwhile Carol and Shawn were halfway down the block, talking about nothing special, and Shawn asked if she got to see Beth or Maggie. She mentioned the concoction Daryl hd crafted for her that knocked her on her ass at about noon, and he busted out laughing. He wished he could have seen that, and she rolled her eyes with a smile on her lips.
"Well, they definitely want to see you." He tucked his hands into his pants pockets and inhaled deeply. "Hey, Carol?"
She turned to stand in front of him. Yes?
"I've made a decision." He searched her eyes and cleared his throat. "I'll do it."
She wasn't sure what he meant for a moment then her lips parted in a gasp, and she stumbled backwards a bit. She wasn't sure how to feel about this, but it wasn't the bubbling excitement she thought she'd feel. Like the night after she'd spoken to him. It was more apprehensive now.
Are you sure?
"Yes, I'm sure. I know you, and you'll make a great mother. I know Mom will be excited to help you through the process, and I'll be there if you need me. I know you'll probably want me to sign off my rights, and that's fine with me. I just... if they ever have any questions about their dad, just feel free to come and find me. I'm still your friend, no matter what, okay?"
Yes, of course. I... Wow, Shawn, that means so much to me. Thank you. She embraced him and rested her head on his shoulder, feeling more shaken than excited. She was sure it was just shock. It'd pass. She was sure once it passed, she'd been bouncing off the walls with happiness. Wouldn't she?
They returned to the cookout, Carol found Daryl and said she wanted to go home now, and he was right there with her. He'd packed up some leftovers for them at Tara's request, and they left without speaking to anybody else or saying goodbye.
Daryl knew why he was go keen to leave, but he didn't know why she was. She had friends at that cookout, probably family to her, but she looked pale. Her hands had been shaking, and she could have sworn he saw panic in her eyes. He didn't ask her about it, because he knew she didn't want to talk about it. If she did, she would have already told him what was going on, so he just sat silently in his seat and kept his eyes out on the road.
Night was creeping down on them, Spike was snoring in the backseat, and Carol pulled over just outside Daryl's road. He studied her and straightened in his seat, seeing she was evening her breathing. He started to ask what was wrong, but she began to sign.
Last month I asked Shawn if he would have a baby with me. Her delicate fingers trembled with each movement, but she kept it up and met his eyes. Just his sperm, you know? I could do the rest on my own, and I told him to think about it. I've always want kids and a big family, but my relationships haven't gone very far, so I decided to take that desire into my own hands. I know Shawn. I trust him. He'd be a good donor for my baby, and... and I told him to take as much time as he needed to decide.
"He gave you an answer?" Daryl's mouth was bone dry.
She nodded with tears in her eyes, a faint smile on her lips growing into a full grin. He said yes. She covered her mouth with her hands and tried to calm her emotions.
He looked straight out through the windshield and recalled what Hershel told him. He gulped down his emotions and pulled out a smile. That's incredible. I'm happy for you.
She snuffled and nodded. This feels like I'm dreaming.
"No, I'm sure it does." He glanced at her. "What...uh, what did you say?"
I.. I don't remember. She laughed. I need to talk to him again and get it set up. I don't even know what all I have to do. I thought he'd need more time, or he'd say no, but he didn't, and... I can't believe it.
"Yeah, I'll bet." He undid his seat. "You should get home and think on this. Celebrate, even. Um, I'll walk the rest of the way. Get Spike's ass up."
I can drive you. I just had to tell you. I couldn't keep it in. She rubbed a knuckle under her hand.
"Nah, it's fine. I need to stretch my legs anyway, but um, I'll see you later, I guess?" He collected his bags of leftovers and Spike, who grumbled and slowly slipped out of the backseat. "Have a good night, and thanks for takin' me today."
It's no problem. I like spending time together with my favorite boy. She snapped her fingers, and Spike looked up. She waved at him and blew him a kiss, and he jumped into the front seat to lick her face. She squealed but accepted his kisses.
"C'mon, Spike, let up." Daryl was trying to rush this goodbye, and this damned dog just made it harder. He prolonged everything Daryl tried to rush. Jesus, he really needed a cat. Or a puppy to leave at home with Spike. Give him some responsibility. "Now, Spike!"
Carol felt Spike jolt and frowned when he climbed out of the car and bolted off down the road, Daryl cursed after him, and Carol wanted to ask if everything was all right, but he said good night and good luck. He closed the car door and disappeared down his road, and Carol lowered her eyes, slouching back into her seat and thinking over everything that happened today. She couldn't process it, to be honest, so she decided to just go home and take a bubble bath and try to figure out how she felt, because she was all over the spectrum.