Hi, sorry for the late update, so this chapter will start some weeks after last chapter and it will be linked with part III.
NOTE 1: For the dream and memory part, everything between [ ] it's to introduce the scene, I mean, the dream sequence will show different memories of Alison, so every time that you see [ ], that means that's a new scene, another memory… I hope it's clear…
Sonata of love part VI
*** Alison's dream – memories of the past ***
[In the DiLaurentis house]
A little Alison was slowly opening her eyes and as soon as she did it, a warm hand caressed her tiny face…
Alison mumbled with blurry vision. – "Mommy?"
Her birth mother hugged her and she didn't stop showing tears of happiness as her precious little angel was finally waking up without a fever. Between kisses and sobs, her mother held her into her arms and Alison just curled on the warm body of her mother.
Her mother said. – "Don't worry, my little angel, you will be ok… everything will be ok… I promise…"
Alison smiled, feeling safe on the arms of her mother. – "I love you mommy…"
[Alison's 8th birthday]
Someone knocked the door and Alison opened it…
A little Spencer said as she was graving a gift. – "Here! Happy birthday!" (She looked around, looking for party decorations but she found nothing)
A little Alison said as she was trying to hide the bruises. – "Spencer, I'm in the middle of a lesson, you should leave…"
Spencer. – "Whaat?! But it's your birthday! Are we not gonna celebrate it?!" (She notices the wounds on Alison's arms) "Uhm… how'd you get that welt?"
Alison looked down and said. – "I… I was in a hurry and I bumped my arms…"
Spencer. – "You really are a klutz, aren't you?"
(Screams of Jessica, calling Alison)
Jessica yelled. – "Alison! Hurry back now!"
Spencer. – "Whoa! That scared me!"
Alison looked down and sighed heavy. – "Sorry Spencer, she is calling me, let's celebrate my birthday another time; ok?"
Spencer. – "Oh… sure… okay, then, good luck!"
Alison closed the door and walked towards the studio where Jessica was waiting for her…
Jessica pointed out towards the piano and ordered. – "Sit yourself down and let's begin!"
Alison mumbled. – "I miss my mommy…"
Jessica. – "I'm your mother now, Alison… now, stop playing around and focus in the only thing that matters… this piano…"
The little Alison took a deep breath and she started playing the piano…
[Alison's 9th Birthday, in an international competition]
Jessica got mad because Alison couldn't play the way she told her to do and she started hitting Alison even in the presence of people around them…
Mary. – "Ms. DiLaurentis! What are you doing?!"
Jessica ignored Mary and she continued hitting Alison as she yelled at her. – "Just what do you call that performance?!" How many times have I told you to review the score?! You idiot!"
Mary said as she was trying to stop Jessica. – "Stop it! Stop it! You're too harsh, she's just a little girl!"
Jessica pushed Mary and said. – "Don't dare to stop me!"
Mary. – "I'm her nanna! I will not let you hurt her anymore!"
Jessica. – "If you don't like how I discipline her, then, you're fired!" (Jessica's attention was once again on Alison and she hit her for a last time and it was so strong the hit that she made her bleed) "Why can't you even play an easy piece like that? You're so worthless!"
Alison, covered with bruises and with the blood running over her face, she stared at Jessica into the eyes with a lot of anger and she threw towards Jessica the piano scores…
Jessica. – "How dare you throw that score! You should be ashamed of yourself!"
Alison. – "All I wanted was for you to make you happy because if you're happy then you promised me that I would be able to see her again, my real mom… so, even when I wanted to play with Spencer, even when you hit me… I put up with it, I put up with it and kept practicing because I want to see her… but now…" (She closed her fist and screamed with a lot of anger) "NOW I wish you would just die!"
(Gasps of shock from the entire crowd, Jessica and Mary, included)
That was the last time, Alison said anything to Jessica…
*** End of the dream ***
(Sounds of the alarm)
Alison wildly sits on her bed, sweating cold, she rubes her face with her hands. She looks up and she stares at her calendar….
Alison sighs heavy as she notices what day was today. – "Oh… so that's way I'm having those dreams these week… that 'day' is coming…"
That same day in Julliard…
Spencer says as she's staring at the window. – "Ali… the 'pervert' is looking for you…" (She chuckles as she's looking at Emily) "She reminds me when Toby's looking for his socks…"
Alison sighs. – "Don't say anything… if she finds me, it'll get noisy…"
Spencer. – "You look tired…"
Alison sighs. – "I haven't been sleeping well…"
Spencer. – "You never sleep well when your bir-…"
Alison. – "Don't! Don't say it!"
Spencer sighs with sadness. – "I wonder if this year, we'll be able to celebrate it…"
Alison. – "There's nothing to celebrate…"
Spencer.- "Ali! Why you're always so reluctant to celebrate your birthday?!"
Alison sighs and stands up. – "You know what, I better go, I don't want to snap against you or Emily…"
Spencer. – "Is that the reason why you're avoiding her?" she know your birthday is this week?"
The blonde doesn't reply, she just leaves and walks towards the pool, it was already very late and at that hour of the day, there was no one in there and that's why she chose to be there…
Alison. – "Finally, some peace and quiet…" (Deep breath) "I've been spending more time around other people than I thought was possible. I'm exhausted… it's exhausted…"
The blonde is so lost on her own thoughts that she doesn't pay attention on the floor, she trips with something and falls on the pool…
Alison's thoughts as she's falling into the bottom of the pool. – "It's totally dark at the bottom… I can't hear a sound… I can't feel a thing…." (Sighs) "It's nice to don't feel… don't feel pain… don't feel sorrow of the past… don't feel the emptiness…"
The blonde doesn't swim up, she does nothing and she just left her own body being dragged to the bottom of the pool. She recalls in her mind Spencer's question: "Why you're always so reluctant to celebrate your birthday?!"
Alison mumbles. – "Why?" (Sighs of absence of oxygen) "Because it reminds me of my mom…"
*** Alison's mind: Flashback***
A little Alison of 5 years old was happily sleeping in the floor, hugging her teddy bear as she was happily falling asleep, hearing her mom playing the piano for her…
Alison's mother. – "Falling asleep under the piano again?" (Smile) "You're going to catch a cold…"
The little blonde rolls on the floor and with sleepy eyes, she stares at her mother who was playing for her 'Love's sorrow of Rachmaninoff's. She always played it for her as a lullaby…
Alison's mother. – "You've gotten heavy, haven't you, my angel?"
The little girl smiles and her smile gets bigger when she's hold on her mother's arms…
Hermother kisses her head and says. – "Happy birthday, my angel…"
*** End of the flashback ***
As old memories hit her mind, it's getting heavy to breath; she looks up at the pool and she can see a strong light above her…
Alison's thoughts. – "Is it because it's a pool? Is it because the moon's out?"
The blonde starts closing her eyes and she notices that someone gets in the pool and starts swimming very fast towards her. This person stretches her arms and grabs the blonde, swimming both of them at the top were the light was brighter…
Alison's thoughts. – "Maybe… just maybe, the light can reach even the bottom of a dark ocean…"
The blonde is dragged back to reality and she wildly open her eyes as someone else is screaming her name and shaking her body…
Emily. – "ALI! ALI! ALI! Wake up! Please! PLEESSSEEE!"
The blonde coughs the water out of her system and sits on the floor; she looks up at the broken brunette in front of her…
Emily says with watery-eyes. – "How could you…?"
Alison gulps. – "Emily…"
Emily cries. – "How could you drown in such a shallow pool?!
Alison pleads. – "Don't cry…"
Emily cries a lot and the blonde hugs her, trying to calm down the crying of the brunette…
Alison. – "Don't cry…" (She looks up at the sky and says) "Look…."
Both girls look up at the starry sky…
Emily. – "The stars are so beautiful. It's like the stars are speaking to us…" (She turns her head in direction of the blonde and she gulps when she notices a tear, rolling over Alison's cheek) "Ali…?"
Alison takes a deep breath and sings as she's staring at the sky. – "Twinkle, twinkle, little star, how I wonder what you're…"
Emily clears Alison's tear and she starts singing too as she hugs the blonde very tight…
Emily sings. – "Up above the world so high, like a diamond in the sky…"
Both girls sing at the unison. – "Twinkle, twinkle, little star, how I wonder what you're…"
*** Alison's narrative: A meaningless lullaby… even so, the reason I remember it so well is probably because you're still in my heart… ***
That next day in Julliard…
Alison sighs heavy as her professor drops in front of her; her next assignment…
Erza. – "Rachmaninoff's Love's Sorrow…."
Alison. – "Do I've to play this piece for the gala concert?"
Erza. – "Is there a problem?"
She grips on the music scores, pressing her lips together, refusing to speak out her truth.
Erza. – "Miss. DiLaurentis?"
Alison. – "For a gala concert, we should be playing something more glamorous…"
Erza. – "Don't worry, don't worry, if you play it, it'll sound glamorous enough…" (He notices something off in the girl and says) "Miss DiLaurentis…?"
The blonde leaves the room and she skips classes for the rest of the day.
(In the mall)
Cece was in her lunch break and notices someone familiar, spacing out, sitting alone in a bench…
Cece asks with concern. – "Alison? Don't you have classes?"
The blonde doesn't reply and Cece gets worried, she decides to sit beside her until she decides to open up and share what's in her mind…
Alison mumbles. – "Love's sorrow…"
Cece. – "Sorry, what…?"
Alison. – "Love's sorrow, the companion piece to Love's Joy by Kreisler, was written for the violin. There's a piano version of this song arranged by Rachmaninoff…"
Cece smiles as she's recalling the melody in her mind. – "It's a lovely melody…"
Alison mumbles. – "My mother used to play that all the time…"
Cece gulps hard and her eyes get bigger of shock…
Alison sighs. - "She used to play it a lot as a lullaby…" (She breathes deeply and says) "This piece just reeks too much of my mom… at least of the 'mom' I know it was really my mom…" (Sighs) "So raw… so vivid… it closes in on me… all those memories that I erased… all those sweet bitter memories that I recall in my dreams and I just can't stop dreaming about it…"
(Awkward silence)
Cece gulps hard and presses her lips together…
Alison. – "My mother must've had despised me, right?"
Cece. – "Why you say that?! No mother on earth despises her own child…"
Alison turns her head in direction of Cece and they stares at each other in silence until Alison says…
Alison. – "My real mom… do you think she'll forgive me?"
Cece gulps. – "What do you mean?"
Alison says with a tear and pain in her voice. – "For running away of those memories… for trying so hard to forget all about her…"
Cece gulps. – "Ali…"
Alison. – "I can't remember her face, I can't remember her voice… is it ok for me to play this piece which is so important for us?"
Cece takes a deep breath and says. – "If that's how you feel… if there's something holding you back then try to hear your heart's voice… listen to your heart and don't get brooding over matters of the past… close your eyes, cover your ears and play as you feel for now… you've the technical ability to pull that off; you're not bound by sounds, you sense the notes suffused with your desires and emotions. You've the ability to trace the sounds within you, the sounds you imagine… I'm sure that's a gift…"
They stay in silence for a moment and then Alison realized something; a tiny smile appeared in her face and Cece smiles too, looking at Alison's smile.
Alison stands up and says. – "Thank you…"
Cece. – "What have you decided? Are you playing another song?"
Alison. – "I'm not changing the song. This is a supreme directive from the shrew… these gala is all about standing out, so, I'm going to prove it… just how great musician I'm… I'm gonna play with conviction and embrace this melody as well as those memories that my mom left me…"
The blonde leaves and Cece stays there, sitting in the bench, with the gaze settle far away until a colleague of work approaches…
Co-worker. – "Cece… are you ok…?"
Cece takes a deep breath and says with a tear. – "It's a little sad, you know, to see your kid grow away from you…"
Co-worker. – "I didn't know you've kids…"
Cece chuckles with sadness, she clears her tears and walks back to work…
(In the park)
Still lost on her thoughts, the blonde is walking in the city without a destination, just letting her body being dragged by her steps. She was walking with a gaze settle far away until something else catches her attention…
Alison says with shock. – "Emily?!"
Pepe. – "Woof! Woof!"
The little puppy jumps into the arms of the blonde as the sleepy brunette who was sleeping in the bench starts waking up. Emily jumps of surprise when she notices that Alison is staring at her….
Emily says with a trembling voice. – "H-h-hi Ali…."
Alison notices the bags around the bench. – "Did you spend the night here?" (She gulps when the brunette stays in silence) "Why?"
Pepe jumps into the bench and he licks Emily's fingers, the brunette chuckles with the touch of the dog and she puts him in her lap. She glues her eyes on the dog as she's caressing it…
Emily mumbles. – "They kick me out of the dorms…"
Alison.- "WHAT?! WHY?!"
Emily. – "I'm not supposed to have animals and I couldn't let Pepe in the streets again…"
Alison. – "He's in the streets right now…"
Emily mumbles. – "But at least he's not alone…"
Alison sighs and she shakes her head; Emily is too embarrassed to look at her into the eyes but she's forced to look up when she notices Alison grabbing her bags…
Emily. – "What are you doing?"
Alison. – "I'm not leaving you in the streets either…" (Sighs) "I'm taking these bags, you take the boxes…."
Emily. – "Ali, you don't have to…"
Alison cuts her off and says with a mandatory voice. – "Emily! I'm not asking you, I'm telling you to grab those boxes and follow me!"
Emily. – "Yes sir!"
The brunette grabs the boxes and follows the blonde…
(In the gala concert)
The entire auditorium was full, people stay in silence as soon as Alison emerges on scene, taking a sit on the piano. Locked in her own word, Alison stares at her hands, shaking and she bares her teeth and closes her fists…
Alison's self-talk in her mind. – "Keep it together Alison! Look at your audience! You've to prove it! How incredible you're!"
The blonde hit the keys really hard; setting a strong tempo on her performance…
Mary mumbles from her seat as she grips her lap. – "The song that you loved it… the song that was your lullaby, so you've been facing it alone all this time… but…. Is this the 'Love's Sorrow' that you've always known?"
Alison's self-talk in her mind. – "Just watch… just watch… I'm incredible… I'm more than incredible!"
Emily mumbles with concern from her seat. – "She looks pissed…"
Erza sighs and tilts his head down. – "What a disappointment… she's only venting her anger… she's confusing crudeness with ferocity… this grates on my ears…"
The melody was rough and the blonde knew it..."
Alison's self-talk in her mind. – "Huh? I'm pounding the keys that hard? My whole body is taut… this won't do at all… this piece isn't… this isn't how she played it, right? The song that I always listened to was… this song was my lullaby… I don't understand… I can hear the sound of those notes inside me…"
As the blonde is locked in her own world, she recalls in her mind her previous talk with Cece and for one reason she can't understand, an old memory hit her mind…
*** Alison's memory ***
[A little Alison (4 years old) in the lap of her mom, her mom is sitting on the floor; both were with a happy smile as the little Alison was putting her tiny fingers over a piano's kid]
Alison giggles as she hits the keyboard with a lot of force, just hitting hard the keys…
Alison's mom. – "Ali, don't…" (Chuckles and kisses on the head of the little girl) "Look, you have to do it like this…" (She softly puts her fingers in the toy) "Are you listening, Ali? You mustn't play so violently… the piano is you… if you touch it gently, it will smile; if you pound it with force, it will become enraged. Touch it like you're caressing your teddy bear…"
The little Alison follows the instruction and she gently puts her fingers on the keyboard…
Her mom smiles. – "That's it Ali! Just like that!" (She fills Alison's face with kisses and then she says as she grabs Alison's hands, guiding them to slide over the keyboard) "Play it gently… play it like you're embracing him…"
*** END of the memory ***
Alison's eyes starts showing tears and the audience gasp…
Emily mumbles with concern from her seat as she's staring at the blonde with tears. – "Ali…"
Still locked in her own world, Alison tilts her head back and she stares at the lights that are above her; she can feel the tears dropping from her eyes and she takes a deep breath as she closes her eyes and says….
Alison. – "Mom… this song… if it were you… would you've played it like this?"
The tempo of the song changes; the blonde stop pounding the piano with force, she starts gliding her fingers lightly over the keys and the melody becomes sweet… soft… just like the touch of love…
Erza drops his jaw open and mumbles. – "Her playing style just changed… the sound is changing…"
Emily smiles. – "Ali…"
Alison's self-talk in her mind. – "Ahh…. I can't help thinking about her… after all… this song has my mother's scent… will it reach her? I hope it reaches her…"
The entire audience is overwhelmed by the sweet melody; tears start to fall, especially from a young blonde woman from the crowd…
Cece mumbles with tears. – "Ali… I'm so sorry… I'm so sorry… I've no business being by your side… I couldn't take care of you in the past… I just brought you pain and suffering and yet…" (Tears) "You playing this piece… with so much love…." (More tears) "Means the world to me…"
The song ends and everyone stands up, applauding for the exquisite performance…
(Backstage)
Alison falls down, kneeling on the floor and mumbles. – "My knees are shaking…. Guess I'm exhausted…"
Emily rushes towards Alison. – "Ali!" (She kneels in front of her and says) "Ali… are you ok?" (The blonde doesn't reply and Emily says) "Ali…?"
Alison says with a trembling voice. – "She's always been by my side…"
Emily. – "Huh?!"
Alison continues. – "The way I touch the keys, the way I move my fingers, my habit of squeezing the pedals, my tastes, the order that I eat…" (She stares at her shaking hands and says) "Mom's in every little gesture of mine… even if I don't remember her face… even if I don't remember her voice…." (Tears and a heart-breaking voice) "We're… mom and I are connected…"
Emily touches Alison's arm and says with a soft voice. – "Ali…"
Alison looks up and says with tears as she's looking at Emily into the eyes. – "Emily, do you think it reached my mom?" (Tears and sobs) "The way I played my very best… do you think it reached mom?"
Emily hugs her and she hugs her tight as the blonde cries, burring her head on Emily's chest. Sobs and crying were the only thing that was heard in that backstage until someone emerged into the scene…
Cece says with tears. – "It reached her…"
Both girls look up towards the blonde and look confused of what is happening…
Cece chuckles with tears. – "It reached her…. It reached her, my little angel…"
**** Alison's narrative ***
We're all connected. Just like the notes are intermittently connected. It's shared by us all. Through music… with the people you know, with the people you don't know, with all the people in the world. Just like with her, I'm connected to Mom, too. I'm moving forward because of music… because of a sonata of love…