DISCLAIMER: Listen up and Listen good, because I'm only saying this once! OC stuff, not mine. Buffy stuff, not mine.
SUMMARY: the OC/BtVS. Faith was taken from her family when she was ten. Now the Watchers Council is gone she's free to go back, but it's not that easy when over ten years have past and nothing's the same as when you left.
RATING: PG-13 for language. See Warning!
ANGEL TIMELINE: Angel, Spike, Gunn and Illyria survived the fight with Wolfram and Hart, a bunch of slayers were sent at the last moment to help them out, and have rebuilt Angel Investigations. They don't play a part in this story as such, but I had a question that I felt deserved an answer.
WARNING: This chapter hints at/ mentions issues (namely: domestic violence) which some readers may find upsetting. There's nothing at all graphic, but you've been warned.
Distant Elephants by Kiara
3- THERE WAS A BEAUTIFUL PRINCESS…
"What's wrong with Faith?" Buffy went straight to the point. She had only been in Cleveland a day, but she could see that her sister slayer wasn't her usual snarky self.
"How should I know?" Xander replied slightly sullenly.
"Well, you're avoiding her; she's avoiding you; she changes the subject whenever I ask her what's up; she zones out whenever someone mentions your name and you keep looking at each other when you think no one's looking." Buffy said, ticking off her points on her fingers. "All in all, that point's to something you should know about. You guys didn't sleep together again, did you?"
"What? No!" Xander said with a blush.
"Good, cause that would only lead to badness. Much like there is now." Buffy slopped down in the chair opposite her long time friend and looked to him waiting for an explanation.
Xander sighed. "I asked her about her family."
"And..?"
"She told me to get lost. But I can't. Something happened, I don't know what. She's not happy and I can't stand to see her like that." He sounded desperate, lost; he didn't know what to do.
Buffy nodded, but then looked up at her friend sharply. "Oh my God- you like her!"
"Of course I do, she'd my friend."
"No, you like her more than as a friend- all that stuff about how you can't bear to see her hurting, that's serious."
"I don't want to see you hurting, or Dawn or Willow." He said defensively.
Buffy smiled, looking much wiser than she usually would. "But your eyes don't light up like that when you talk about us. Face it Xander, you've been bitten by the love bug. Oh, this is so perfect!"
"This is ridiculous! And I thought you said Faith and I would only lead to badness?"
"Yeah, well that was when I thought you just boinked. But when her pain causes you pain…well, that's how I felt about Angel. How I was beginning to feel about Spike."
Xander pulled her into a hug. Losing Spike had been hard on Buffy, he'd seen that. She'd gone to Italy with Dawn to get away from all the memories, only to hear that Spike was alive, well, undead. He knew how hard it was to give someone up for dead only to have them as part of your life again. "You'll feel that way again."
Buffy shook herself out of her reverie. "Yeah. You should talk to Faith."
He shook his head. "She won't tell me anything. Can you try? Find out what happened pre-Sunnydale?"
"I don't know Xander," Buffy sighed; "I don't think she'll tell me anything. But I'll give it a go." She added, seeing his desperate look.
"Thank you." He said looking pointedly at the door which Faith had just walked through.
"Now?"
He shrugged. "There's no time like the present."
Buffy's answer was to get up and cross the room to where Faith was standing. "Hey Faith."
"Hi." She returned suspiciously. "What were you two talking about?"
"We're worried about you." Buffy said, she saw no point in lying. Faith had probably heard some of it anyway.
"You don't need to be." Faith turned her back on her friend and continued walking away, hoping to put Buffy off that way. It didn't work.
"Oh really? You're not talking to Xander; you're unusually quiet and you look like you haven't slept in days."
"That comes with the slaying gig, B, you know that." Faith attempted at normalcy, trying to shrug off her friend's worries.
"Sure, at one time you might have to stay up for a couple of nights, but not anymore. Now there are more than enough slayers to help out. What's bothering you?"
"Nothing." She ground out, for a moment sounding like the old Faith; the dangerous Faith.
"Yeah, sounds like it. Xander said you freaked when he mentioned your family. What happened with them?"
Faith walked off, but Buffy followed, refusing to be put off so easily.
"Xander's really worried about you."
Faith flinched visibly. She didn't want anyone to worry about her, especially him. "He…he doesn't need to be."
Buffy considered pushing the Xander-aspect a bit further, but decided not to. The last thing she wanted to do was to upset Faith or make her angry. That would only make things worse. "You told me your parents were dead, was that a lie?"
She swung around, her eyes glinting dangerously. "Don't you call those, those bastards my parents." She growled before resuming her storming off.
"Then who are they?" Buffy asked, just as they walked past Dawn who looked up in interest.
"For God's sake Buffy, just fuck off and leave me alone!" Faith strode from the room, slamming the door behind her.
"What was that all about?" Dawn asked from her seat on the sofa.
"All I did was ask her about her family and she totally went off on one! I can't believe she spoke to me like that! I'm gonna give her a piece of my mind." She decided.
"Err, Buffy that's not a good idea." Dawn said.
"And why might that be?"
"Cause Faith was crying." Dawn said quietly.
Buffy sighed, her anger disappearing in an instant. "We need Xander."
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When Buffy returned to sit with Xander he looked up sadly. "Didn't go so well huh?"
"Not at all. I think I made things worse. And I think this is something you're going to have to handle." She said softly.
Xander looked up, his eyes tired and laden with emotion. "Why me?"
Buffy grasped his hands over the table. "Because when we were talking just now I noticed something. She's scared Xander, and alone and she wouldn't let many people see that. You're the person she wants to tell the least, but I think that you're the person she needs to tell the most."
Xander sat back in his chair. He did have feelings for Faith, had for a while. But until his conversation with Buffy a few minutes before, he hadn't known how deep they ran. The thought of her hurting was tearing him up inside and all he wanted was to be able to take that hurt away from her.
"I'll do it; whatever it takes." He pledged, and he meant it one hundred percent.
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"I don't want to see anyone."
Faith spoke as soon as Xander came within five feet of her.
"So you came to the one place you knew I'd find you?" Xander said, carefully keeping all the emotion out of his voice. He wanted to see where she took this but Faith didn't say anything.
"You don't have to be the strong one all the time. You can let people help you." He said, but he didn't get a reply or even a look. She kept staring straight ahead, pretending his eyes weren't on her.
They stood like that for a while, him waiting for her to make the first move, her trying to find the words. When he'd been there for nearly ten minutes and neither had said a word, he sighed heavily and made as if to walk away.
"Xander?" She sounded so weak, so helpless. She cursed herself for sounded so pathetic, so unlike the Faith everyone was used to; but right now all she wanted was for someone to hold her and tell that everything was going to be alright. She wanted to be looked after for once rather than put on the same old front. Did anyone even buy the act anyway?
He didn't need for her to say anything more. He walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her shoulders, offering her all the comfort he could just by being there.
"You're shivering." He stated, tightening his arms around her and pulling her back to him. He was surprised when she relaxed into his embrace and when he looked down at her silent tears were washing down her cheeks. "I'm not going anywhere." He promised rubbing her bare arms in an attempt to banish the goose bumps from her skin.
She let out a sob, a strangled hiccough making its way to the surface. Faith took a few calming breaths, drawing her strength from the man behind her. It seemed to be working, and after a few minutes she felt the tears stop.
"This isn't going to go away, Faith. You've kept it a secret from us for six years." He murmured. "You can't go on pretending."
Another hiccough. "I know."
Xander waited for her to go on, but he found that he needed to prompt her. "Your name's Faith Cohen."
He felt her nod. "Yes."
"What happened to her?"
"She- I was located as a potential. I couldn't stay at home after that." Faith said dully.
"What was your home like?" He pressed gently.
"Good." She breathed, a smile dancing on her lips. "Mom was rich; I had everything I ever wanted. Dad was a lawyer; he worked in the DA office- he was one of the best, but he always made sure he was home before I went to bed so he could say goodnight. Sometimes, if he had a big case on, he even came home for a few minutes and then went back to the offices."
"They sound nice."
Faith nodded again. She hadn't spoken about her family for so long, but it felt right telling Xander and already she could feel a huge weight being lifted off her shoulders. "And Seth, he'd be…seventeen now, I wouldn't even recognise him."
"What happened?"
There was a long pause as Faith tried to get her thoughts together. "I was ten. I didn't know this at the time, but the Watchers Council had been watching me for a while- checking out my potential I suppose. They decided that if they asked Mom and Dad if they could take me for training there was a real danger that they'd say 'no'. So they just did it, grabbed me off the streets when I was walking home from school. The Council told me that when they told my family I was a potential, they didn't want me; that with the attacks that came hand in hand with slaying they decided it was too risky for Seth. I don't know if I believe that anymore, it seems a little convenient and if they wanted me to leave, why did they have to kidnap me? They loved me, I know they did."
Xander was quiet. He didn't really know what to say. But something told him that the happy family Faith had described wasn't the reason for her sadness now. "Where did they take you?"
She stiffened in his arms. "I don't want to talk about it."
"Maybe not, but I think you need to. I'm here Faith, no matter what. There's nothing you could say to make me leave." He said, putting all his emotion into his voice, hoping against hope that she'd trust him.
She was quiet for a few moments longer, but began to talk slowly and distantly as if it wasn't really her; it had been so long, especially with her forced silence, that she'd disassociated herself from the events. "Their names were Thomas and Jane. They seemed nice at first. Jane used to do a lot of housework whenever I was home from school so everything around the house was really clean and perfect looking, but we didn't talk that much.
"Thomas…was violent. I was just a kid, I couldn't stop him. And even when I could, even when I learnt enough with my watcher, I still couldn't stop him. The things he used to say, he made me feel powerless. I hate feeling that way."
Xander said nothing while she poured her heart out, telling him things she'd never told anyone, but inside he was seething. He could never understand how anyone could harm an innocent child and to realise that Faith had gone through so much left him raging. Unconsciously, he tightened his grip around her.
"…Jane knew. I could see it in her eyes, the way she looked at me. He may have hit her too, but I doubt it... she never stopped him. Just pretended we were this normal family and kept cleaning that damn house."
"Why didn't you tell anyone what he was doing?" He asked gently when she finished speaking.
"What? With the Watchers Council watching my every move? I'm pretty sure they knew anyway, I mean, how could they not have had any idea when they were watching me 24/ 7 to make sure I couldn't run away?"
"They might not have." He said, blocking out the possibility that the Watchers could have let that happen. "I'm sorry you had to go through that." He said sincerely, not knowing how to deal with what she'd told him.
Faith shrugged uncomfortably. Telling Xander her darkest secrets left her feeling vulnerable, but she was pleasantly surprised that he hadn't let go of her. He was still holding her, like nothing had changed; like she was still the same person to him and not damaged goods. It meant more to her to have his touch than she'd admit even to herself. "I guess I figured that I would hurt people before they could hurt me- otherwise I'd have gone insane."
Xander nodded. He could understand that, and it explained the way she was when she arrived in Sunnydale. "Do you know where they are now?"
"Dead." Faith answered with no sadness in her voice. "Killed by a group of vampires who found out they were working for the Watchers just after I left."
He nodded, letting go of the slayer and moving to stand next to her, trying to get his head around what he been told.
Her heart wrenched at the loss of contact. "So that makes things different, huh?" Faith whispered after a moment.
"What?"
"Now that you know. I don't want your pity, Xander. I want things to be normal between us." She said, barely audibly, her voice cracking despite her best efforts to keep it steady.
"You are one of, if not the, strongest, bravest people I've ever met." Xander said firmly, taking both of her hands in his. He leaned forward and placed a kiss on her forehead before continuing.
"You don't have to be on your own anymore, Faith. I won't let anyone hurt you, ever." Xander stopped. Should he tell her? He needed to get it off his chest. "This is probably the last thing you need to hear right about now, but I think I need to say it. I love you. I think I have for a while, but I only realised it today." He paused as Faith gaped at him. "I'm sorry; I shouldn't have loaded that on you right now. I'll go."
He backed up, running a hand through his hair, taking one last look at her before he headed back to the centre.
Faith stood there for a moment, staring at his retreating back. She hugged her arms around her, trying to ward off the chill threatening to invade her body.
"I love you too."
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Well that chapter totally ran away from me. I didn't plan for half of that to happen! This wasn't even meant to be a romantic fic. Having said that, it's not going to be easy, mwah ha ha! Please let me know what you thought; until next chapter,
Kiara xxx