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Entry Number Two Hundred Twenty-Six:
Look. Through all these pages I've repeated several times that I want Hamtaro to return my feelings.
But look again…
Nowhere in these golden pages does it say why…
Entry Number Two Hundred Twenty-Seven:
How could I have wanted something so badly and not have known why?
That's what I'm asking myself as I run down these halls.
Entry Number Two Hundred Twenty-Eight:
People are trying to come up to me and talk to me, but I walk right past them.
Hamtaro's not chasing after me.
Good. I don't want him to.
Entry Number Two Hundred Twenty-Nine:
It's not that I don't like him because I do!
Really!
But it's just that something about his confession didn't seem right, and I have to figure out why.
Entry Number Two Hundred Thirty:
But that answer will come when I figure out why exactly I like him.
That's priority number one.
Entry Number Two Hundred Thirty-One:
So here I am, sitting by the butterfly garden that Sparkle presented.
The assembly seems like hours ago.
Entry Number Two Hundred Thirty-Two:
"Bijou! Bijou!"
Pashmina and Sandy come up to me.
"We've been looking everywhere for you!"
Entry Number Two Hundred Thirty-Three:
"Did you hear?" Sandy asks excitedly. "Sparkle's been suspended for giving you that evil cookie! Isn't that great?"
I shake my head and Pashmina seems to notice that everything isn't great.
"Is everything alright, Bijou?"
Entry Number Two Hundred Thirty-Four:
"She only went zoo school because she 'ad zoo. She is a zinger…she does not care for educashun. She will become a zucsessful pop ztar, but what will become of moi?"
The two of them gasp. "I completely forgot!" Pashmina exclaims. "What did you and Hamtaro talk about?"
"Are you two officially going out?"
I shake my head again. "I left 'im before 'e could azk."
"WHY?!!!" The two of them exclaim. Pashmina hits my arm.
"Oww! Zat 'urt!"
"Good! It was supposed to!"
"Bijou, we thought that getting Hamtaro to like you was the whole point of taking on this perfection makeover," Sandy says, looking disappointed. "He does like you, doesn't he?"
I nod. "But zoo you two remember why I liked 'im?"
Entry Number Two Hundred Thirty-Five:
"Liked? As in past tense? You don't like him anymore?" Pashmina asks.
"I zoo! Really! But I can't remember why, and zat is zee problem!"
The two of them look like they're about to fall over with shock.
"That's the reason why you walked away?" Sandy looks furious.
I hear a guitar playing somewhere…
"Yeah, I do, too," Pashmina responds. "And yes, before you ask, you did think out loud."
Entry Number Two Hundred Thirty-Six:
The three of us walk over to the other side of the garden and find…
…Jingle?
"The one and only," He responds, leaning against a tree and strumming his guitar.
"So you actually decided to make something out of your life and come to school today?" Sandy demands with her hands on her hips. "Come on guys, we're wasting time-"
"Music is my school, the melody my teacher and the notes are my comrades. I don't know about you but I couldn't possibly want to lave all that."
Sandy rolls her eyes. "As I was say-"
"The last thing you want to do is go away because she has a problem and I have advice to say," Jingle sings.
"Are you talking about Bijou?" Pashmina asks, looking from me to him.
"Yes…" He looks at me, opening his eyes and putting his guitar down. "You need help."
Entry Number Two Hundred Thirty-Seven:
"Well, she's not gonna get any help from you," Sandy explains. She and Pashmina start to walk away but I don't follow.
Instead, I lean forward and ask, "Can you 'elp me?"
"You need to forget this idea that you need a reason for everything…just lay back and follow you life's swing," he tells me.
"But zat is not good enough! I need zoo know why I like…I mean…I need zoo follow a straight path! I zhink it is part of my nature." Sandy was right. This is just a waste of time. I get up and start to leave when Jingle calls out:
"If you always have straight things, then you'll never have a bowl full if curly, delicious noodles, and everyone loves noodles!"
Entry Number Two Hundred Thirty-Eight:
Noodles? Why does that ring a bell?
Oh! I remember!
Entry Number Two Hundred Thirty-Nine:
Noodles? Do you remember when I said that?
We're walking up the stupid mountain.
It's not even a pretty mountain.
"Bijou! How could you do that?"
"Zoo what?"
"Waste fabric on her!"
I told you, I am the dictionary definition of perfect.
Maxwell can prove it to you!
Hehe Hamtaro thinks I smell nice!
"What do you say, Bijou? I'll give it to you for a kiss!"
Hmm…these sprinkles taste….bitter.
In a few minutes, I have to present the garden to the audience…
And I don't have a voice!
Entry Number Two Hundred Forty:
This is not perfect.
I suddenly find myself walking to the classroom where I just left Hamtaro as all these memories flash in my mind.
"I see you've tried my cookies. A lot of people think they taste simply amazing. In fact, you could say that they leave you speechless."
"Please don't say anything until I finish."
Okay…no problem there.
I thought out loud even when I didn't have a voice!
"Zat if I forgot it, zhen it wazn't important enough zoo remember."
"Fine, take your three dollarz. I zon't even know what you are going to zoo with them, anyway. And zid you even take notez?"
Doesn't he know I try to be perfect just for him!
"Perfect for who?"
Feels. So Tight. Can't breathe.
I thought out loud again, didn't I?
"Yup."
"You've really got to get over that habit."
I hate this accent!
Swell? Are we living in the 50s?
"I am going to take zat as a 'yes'. Zee zhis picture of me? Say 'perfect'!"
"Ookwee."
"No, 'perfect'!"
My name is Bijou.
I am a nice person.
I am a Ham-Human girl.
…No, really, I am…
I love my friends so much…
It's just that I have to be perfect, and it's not easy to be perfect.
Entry Number Two Hundred Forty-One:
I run into the classroom and thank my lucky stars that Hamtaro is still there.
He's sitting on a desk and his head was down until he looked up at me.
"Bijou-"
But I interrupt.
"I'm a nice person…No, really, I am…It'z juzt zat I zhought I 'ad zoo be perfect, and it'z not eazee zoo zhink zat you 'ave zoo be perfect…"
Hamtaro looks at me curiously. "So that was your diary I found…" (1)
Entry Number Two Hundred Forty-Two:
"And I zhought zat I was starting zoo zhink zat perfection isn't a necezzity, remember? I made zat speech in front of you earlier. But I guess I 'ave a long way zoo go because despite everyzhing, I still zhought zat I needed zoo like you for a reason. Zat is trying to make zense of everyzhing even when it does not need explaining, and zat means I was trying zoo make zee situashon perfect."
Hamtaro smiles at me. "So you don't think we need a bunch of reasons to get together?"
Isn't that what I just said?
"Yes…" I pause. "You're naïve. Really naïve. You zid not get my hints about liking you for all zhese years. You're so zilly! But I guess it looks cute on you…mostly because you're zo nice az well-"
"Bijou! You keep giving me reasons why you like me!"
"I zoo?" Wait… "I zoo!!!"
Entry Number Two Hundred Forty-Three:
"I'd love zoo 'ave a relashunship with you, 'amtaro, if you will forgive me?"
"Are you kidding me? You broke my heart and you think that I'll just sweep you up into my arms and tell you that that's okay?"
I lower my head. I should have expected this.
Suddenly, I feel warmth around me.
I look up and see Hamtaro hugging me.
"…because if you want me to, I will…" he tells me.
Entry Number Two Hundred Forty-Four:
As we look at each other, our faces are getting closer…
Cats! This is it!
Here it goes!
Entry Number Two Hundred Forty-Five:
"Wait," Hamtaro says.
He goes to the classroom door and opens it, only to find Pashmina, Sandy, Maxwell, Stan, Oxnard, Boss, Jingle, Panda, the cheerleaders and virtually everyone else in the school fall over.
"Maxwell, you are such a liar! You told us that there would be free food in here!" Stan exclaims.
"What? I did not. It was your bright idea to come here and eavesdrop!" Maxwell shouts back.
Entry Number Two Hundred Forty-Six:
"Perfect, guyz," I say as Hamtaro takes my hand and steps over the pile of Ham-Humans on the floor.
Entry Number Two Hundred Forty-Seven:
I am a nice person.
At least, I'm pretty sure I am.
It's just that I had this crazy idea that I had to change to be perfect, and now I realize that I don't.
Entry Number Two Hundred Forty-Eight:
Wait…that sounded cocky.
I guess I need more time to get this non-perfect thing down.
Entry Number Two Hundred Forty-Nine:
But right now, Hamtaro's taking me to the ice cream parlor.
That doesn't sound cocky.
Entry Number Two Hundred Fifty:
That sounds perfect.
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"So that was your diary I found…" Is a reference to "The Ribbon that Laced the Diary" which is the oneshot sister fic to this story. For those of you that haven't read it, in it, Hamtaro finds Bijou's diary and reads the first entry which is "I am a nice person, no really I am, etc." It's the first thing you read in this fic.
So yeah, that was the end. I'm sorry if the ending was corny! That's the way I had it planned since the beginning!
I was surprised when a whole lot of you sent me Private Messages asking if Hamtaro and Bijou were going to get together. I guess a lot of you weren't expecting that I would make Bijou apologize to Hamtaro.
Well, now all I have to do is update Chuujitsu, and after that, Petals comes out! Yay! I can't wait!
-CN