Chapter 12: Gorilla Mindset

The days leading up to the end of term were a blur. There was a strange attitude going around the school- some weren't surprised that a Slifer lost the school duel for the Academy, while others chose to look on the bright side and commend Jaden for his effort. I couldn't be sure of how this would affect the school's reputation in the long run, but the academy's formerly spotless esteem had surely been harmed by this loss. I couldn't imagine how outside observers were reacting to the fact that Sheppard allowed a Slifer Red to even compete in such a prestigious event. And to lose...well, I'm sure the headmaster's seat was getting hotter by the second.

On the whole though, Jaden seemed unaffected by the murmurings of his peers. He didn't care. And I mean he really didn't care. People often say that they "don't care" about things to look tough, but Jaden truly was unmoved by their snide remarks. Still, a certain melancholy clung to him as the final days of the semester. Although Chazz Princeton had never been anywhere near kind to him, Jaden still seemed somewhat sad that he hadn't persuaded his rival to return to Duel Academy.

As for me, I found myself thrown off balance and struggling to realign. Chazz winning the school duel was unexpected to say the least. And that he managed to win in the same way that I defeated him….it was insulting to say the least. I sure as hell wasn't sad that he was gone, but I had to wonder how things would go for him up north. One thing is for sure; he wouldn't become the same person as he was in the anime. In that sense, my knowledge of the future had become less useful, but that was going to happen soon enough anyways. My knowledge of canon was by nature a depreciating asset. At the end of it all, I would become a "normal" person, my preternatural gifts used up.

The ferries were on their way, and we only had about eight hours to go before first semester would be officially in the books. During this time, most of the students were celebrating the end of term with the usual parties, games, and in some cases just sleeping all day.

Zane and I, on the other hand, were in the Obelisk Duel Arena, dueling for the twenty-first time that day. I was lucky I packed first thing in the morning, because I don't think I was going to have time now.

"Cyber Twin Dragon, attack his Chaos Sorcerer with twin evolution burst!" The Kaiser bellowed, his doubled-headed hydra rearing back to fire off a round of blue lasers at my monster.

"Not so fast, bud! I activate my face-down quick-play spell, Shrink! This card- ah, fuck it. You know what it does." I say with significantly less enthusiasm, fighting back a yawn.

"Well played, sir, but not well played enough! I chain my own quick-play spell, Limiter Removal! This card doubles my Cyber Twin Dragon's attack points, essentially nullifying your Shrink's effect!"

The cybernetic dragon atomized my spellcaster, lowering my life points to zero. (Zane 500/Jamie 0)

Zane smiled genuinely and brightly. "That was another well-played duel, Jamie. Playing against you is great! It's been so long since I've faced an equal, and you fit the bill with aplomb! Man, I could do this every day!"

"We have been doing this every day." I mutter, turning off my duel disk. "What does that make the score now?"

"That was the tiebreaker, I'm up 21-20 on you now…so I guess we can go get food now that I'm ahead." Zane said, our stomachs rumbling simultaneously. He was so far from his normally regal countenance- he was letting himself enjoy this moment.

I nodded wearily. Ever since the school duel, I had been dueling with Zane to keep my skills sharp. He wasn't too keen on the idea at first, but now he was in an uncharacteristically good mood. I didn't understand why he was so happy at first, but I suppose it was like he said- he was glad that he finally found an equal to spar against. For Zane, finding a sparring partner to go all out against was nearly impossible- in fact, it was the fundamental issue that defined his character arc in the series.

That problem had plagued him for most of his life- it was truly lonely at the top. Sure, Jaden had tied with him in one of the best duels in the series. Sure, Aster Phoenix defeated him in that fateful match in the pro leagues. But it wasn't until his legendary fight with Yubel, the fight that ultimately resulted in his death, that Zane had finally achieved his heart's greatest desire.

But now, the hunger was sated. I was glad beyond words that I could fulfill his desire. Perhaps now Zane wouldn't embark on the dark road he went down in canon. If the price for that was slogging through these tedious duels, then so be it. It was different, now that I was one of them. These were not characters on a screen, they were people, and friends at that. I wanted the best for them.

"You got lucky with that Limiter Removal, you know." I jibe.

"Ha! As if you haven't gotten lucky several times before. But nothing can replicate the skill with which you wield your cards. You know the most optimal plays like the back of your hand, Jamie. I never thought I could find someone who could reach my level, but somehow, you've done it. I know I seem a bit giddy, but I've been waiting for something like this for what seems like my whole life. It's literally a dream come true." Zane admitted.

"Believe me, I understand what it feels like to want something that is out of reach." I said, and I thought of my old life for the first time in a while. "People live and die trying to grasp that which eludes them. I'm glad I could help you achieve your dream."

"Yes…and yet, I still feel there are new plateaus to reach, far greater heights to which I must ascend." Zane replied as we walked to the Obelisk dining hall. "There are still duelists better than the both of us out there. We must keep improving, and find purpose in the journey, rather than the destination."

It was somewhat of a trite statement, but true all the same. "Indeed." We grabbed out food and sat down to eat. Zane was experimenting with some rare lamb chops, while I was partaking in some buttered walleye fillets with lemon. Have I mentioned the food in this place is godlike!?

"Ah, very good choice. I saw Gordon Ramsey make that one on Masterchef last night." Zane commented. I still couldn't believe he watched cooking shows, but hey, truth is stranger than fiction.

"Yeah, I can't wait to sink my teeth into it-" I said with relish, but as the fork was an inch from my mouth, I heard my phone ring. My ringtone was the 'Bill Nye the Science Guy' theme song.

"I wonder what Bastion wants." I said as I held the phone to my ear. "What's up, bro?"

"Jamie, it's urgent! I was talking an afternoon walk to study some plants, as I usually do, when suddenly I was accosted by what appeared to be a chimpanzee wearing cybernetic attachments! Furthermore, it was carrying my sweet Jasmine over its shoulder! I tried to reason with it, but it simply punched me in the stomach and ran off! How barbaric of him! We're over by the Slifer dorm! Any assistance would be greatly appreciated!" My friend shouted.

I pinched the bridge of my nose in exasperation. I knew I couldn't avoid this damn filler episode. I guess I was lucky enough to avoid the Tarzan-or-whatever-the-fuck-his-name-was debacle, but really, the universe had to throw the damn dueling monkey in my path! What a load of monkey business, eh?

"Well, I'll be right over, I guess." I grunted. Putting my hand over the speaker, I asked, "Do you want to help me find a dueling monkey with artificial intelligence, Zane? Could be fun, don't you think?"

"Meh, no thanks. I would, but I've recorded some Rachel Ray episodes I need to catch up on. I'm sure between you and Bastion's considerable intelligence, you can find some way to subdue a stray chimpanzee. Good luck!" Zane waved.

"Thanks, your support is truly inspiring." I reply sarcastically, rushing out of the dining hall with my food uneaten.

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As I got closer to the Slifer Red dorms, I heard the distinctive shrieks of an angry chimp. Either Bastion had finally snapped, or the monkey was near. As I arrived to the alabaster cliffs overlooking the southern coast, I looked down the way to see the crime scene.

Bastion had his hands on his knees, sweating profusely and out of breath from chasing down the wayward monkey. And yet still, his eyes burned with determination to save his would-be girlfriend. I had to wonder how far a distance he had been running- I walked here from the Obelisk Blue dorms and I had still managed to catch up with them. Something tells me this monkey was toying around with the poor guy.

Wheeler, the world's first dueling monkey, stood with his back to the Cliffside, with Jasmine slung over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes- or would it be bananas in this case? A mechanical vest was affixed to his chest, with a bright red visor obscuring his eyes. An academy-standard duel disk was attached to his arm- this monkey was ready for war!

I decided to hurry my pace, racing down the stretch until I had finally got within earshot. "Put Jasmine down, you blithering ape!" Bastion roared, shaking his fist. Jasmine didn't seem too optimistic about her, ahem, savior.

"Woah, what's going on here?!" I asked in mock surprise.

"Lancaster, you better hurry up and save me or I'm going to be pissed!" Jasmine nagged. Huh, she doesn't seem to like me for some reason. She was lucky Bastion was here, or I might have kept on walking. Just kidding…kind of.

"Jamie, thank you for answering my summons! The situation is most dire; I was just about to ask Jasmine to hang out over winter break when suddenly, this monkey burst out of the tree line and absconded with her in tow! We must find out why this chimpanzee is doing what it's doing, and we must rescue Jasmine!" Bastion declared heroically. Normally I would accuse him of white-knighting, but I guess milady really did need to be saved in this case.

"So, you were about to ask her on a date, huh? Shoot, I was wondering how that whole subplot- I mean situation went." I asked casually.

"Well, we won't find out unless we save her!" Bastion said urgently.

Wheeler suddenly gnashed his teeth, hearing something off in the distance. He howled, pounding his chest in anger. I remembered reading somewhere that chimpanzees were naturally aggressive animals, known for killing and eating other chimps that invaded their territory. However, they were also somewhat more intelligent and emotive than most other primates, capable of making tools and performing acts of altruism within their tribe. Of course, who knows how this technology was affecting Wheeler's behavior.

Come to think of it, technology that grants near-human intelligence to a chimpanzee should be front-page news- such a thing didn't even really exist in my timeline! Who was funding this research, and for what purpose? It was never really explained in the series, but since the lab in which Wheeler's technology was developed was on this island, of all places…I had to wonder if this wasn't Kaiba's handiwork. But why would Kaibacorp be interested in secretive testing and research? Wait, was this shit even legal?

Luckily, it looked like the two guys in suits running through the brush would be able to answer my questions. They wore sunglasses and held tranquilizer rifles in their hands, but were otherwise just the sort of nondescript goons one would expect to see in a shonen anime filler episode.

"Put the girl down, Wheeler! You've wandered too far off the reservation, so to speak. Well, literally too I guess." One of them said, loading the gun with extreme prejudice. In response, Wheeler grabbed Jasmine and held her directly in front of him. Although she was a small girl, there was no way the boys in black could get a clean shot off.

"Damnit, the students weren't supposed to know about this, Wilson! The project was meant to top secret! We're gonna get raked over the coals for this if they talk!" One of the suits whispered hastily. Damn, with the ways he was talking, Bastion and I were about to get hit with those tranquilizer darts after Wheeler!

"What project are you talking about?" Bastion questioned, not out of anger as I would have, but out of curiosity. Something tells me the scientific knowledge that went into this project was a little above these goons' pay grade.

"The cat's out of the bag, Jones…besides, the work we've done is rather obvious at this point." Wilson sighed. "The Wheeler project…a top-secret research and development experiment funded by Kaibacorp to instill artificial intelligence in chimpanzees. The monkeys are supposed to be trained as duelists and are eventually meant to replace Computer A.I as the best way to simulate dueling a real person. The machinery attached to Wheeler enhances all of his cognitive ability to near-human level. He duels much less predictably than a computer does, but is just as dangerous." He explained hastily.

"So, you mean to tell me that this entire operation is top-secret, yet Wheeler was eventually meant to be revealed to the public anyways? Why?" I asked.

Jones sighed heavily. "Look man, we don't know the full story, we're part-time security guards. Rumor is that the higher-ups at Kaibacorp were working to get some legislation passed in the Japanese House of Representatives that would loosen the restrictions on animal testing. We don't know how high this thing goes…Seto Kaiba has never given this project any direction from what we've seen."

So, it's highly possible whomever was in charge of this project is doing it under Kaiba's nose. It is possible that Kaiba himself would be interested in animal testing, but something like this seems like a little much for him. No, it seemed more likely that someone in upper management was getting ideas. Perhaps this person was trying to advance his position by doing the research in private. Then, when the final product was unveiled, Kaiba would be so impressed that he would have no choice but to reward the man who took the initiative. Frankly, something still wasn't adding up.

"We're gonna get to the bottom of this thing. Something isn't right here. First, we need to rescue our classmate." I said strictly.

"Sounds like a good plan, genius. Problem is, we can't get a clean shot when he's using the girl as a hostage. Looks like his self-preservation programming worked too well. So, if you and your buddy have any ideas, we'd be glad to hear them." Wilson shot back rudely.

"Well, by your own accounts, this monkey was designed with one purpose in mind…to duel. So that's what we're going to do! Wheeler, if you can understand me, I challenge you to a duel! If I emerge victorious, you will give Miss Jasmine her freedom. If you win…well, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it." Bastion said strongly, activating his duel disk. I was surprised by how willful his voice was- he was ready to take this risk, and was confident that he would succeed.

"Hey, there we go. I guess you can think of this as a practice exam, kid!" Jones laughed harshly, but was silenced by my glare.

Wheeler, for his part, seemed to be excited at the prospect of a real fight. With a toothy, feral grin, he activated his own duel disk. "Me fight guy with pointy hair!"

"It seems his speech protocols aren't finished yet." Bastion observed dryly, although he felt up his hair with his free hand self-consciously.

"Wait, Jamie should be the one to duel. He's stronger than Bastion!" Jasmine complained. I appreciated the compliment, but her tone left something to be desired.

"I have complete faith in Bastion. He has a deck for nearly every situation, and something tells me he's not gonna have any problems outsmarting a lower primate. No offense, Wheeler." I drawled, leaning back against the nearest tree. Bastion smiled, grateful for my vote of confidence. Jasmine huffed and crossed her arms, having no other options.

"None taken!' The ape barked through its voice box.

"In that case, it's time to duel!" Bastion declared, before a bemused look took him over. "Well, I don't know what sort of deck my opponent plays. After all, there's no way I could have done any research beforehand. Which of my decks should I play?" He questioned.

"Well Bastion, let's take a wild guess here. What kind of deck do you think a monkey, a beast if you will, would play? My guess is dragons." I snarked.

Flushing, Bastion scratched the back of his head. "Well, when you put it that way, it is a bit obvious. A beast deck, then. I know just what to use." Unbuttoning his yellow coat, Bastion took out a forty-card deck from his vest pocket. "My fire deck should be sufficient for this encounter."

"Man, here I'd thought I'd seen it all…this kid really is prepared for anything." Jones said in disbelief. I shook my head with a grin. They had no idea. Bastion was about to turn up the heat, so to speak.

"Let's duel!" He declared, and the game begun. (Bastion 4000/Wheeler 4000)

"So…which one of us is going first…?" Bastion questioned meekly, causing Jasmine to facepalm.

"Don't worry, Wheeler has a rock-paper-scissors algorithm, although between you and me, he always picks rock." Wilson piped up.

"Duly noted. Sounds like someone I know, actually…" Bastion said, looking at me meaningfully. I snickered- what can I say, he was right! I pretty much always picked rock.

"Yeah, yeah. Let's just get this show on the road. I'm very interested in the details behind this little project, but we have to save your little girlfriend first." I say impatiently, reading my phone. What can I say- filler makes me cranky.

"I'm not his girlfriend!" Jasmine protested.

"Wheeler, I choose...paper!" Bastion thrust out a flat palm.

To no one's surprise, Wheeler threw out rock at the same time. "Excellent. I'll start off, then. I summon Fire Princess (1300/1500) in attack mode!" A young woman clad in baggy red robes appeared, wielding a smoothly hewn wooden staff.

"Then, I'll set two cards face-down and end my turn."

"My turn! My turn! I summon Berserk Gorilla (2000/1000)!" As its name might suggest, a rather irate looking ape leapt onto the field, its eyes glowing red with rage.

"Attack!" Despite being programmed with speech protocols, this monkey sure didn't like to mince words. The Berserk Gorilla spewed a stream of white-hot flame towards Bastion's princess.

"Ah, not quite, my fellow simian. I activate my face-down card, Draining Shield! This negates your attack and adds the Berserk Gorilla's attack points to my life points!" A bright green barrier halted the ape's fire breath, and eventually the monster had no choice but to call off his attack. (Bastion 6000/Wheeler 4000)

"And that's not all! When Fire Princess is on the field, you take five hundred points of damage every time I gain life points! From the tip of her staff, the Fire Princess threw a fireball at Wheeler. Jasmine screamed, seemingly forgetting to the fire was merely a hologram. The monkey screeched in pain as well, causing my ears to hurt. (Bastion 6000/Wheeler 3500)

"I set two cards face down! End turn!" Wheeler responded. Bastion didn't miss a beat.

"During your end phase, I activate my other trap card, Solemn Wishes! Now, every time I draw a card or cards, I gain five hundred life points." Bastion said, cool as a cucumber.

"And since it is now my draw, I gain five hundred life points, meaning that you lose 500 life points as well." The Ra Yellow student continued. (Bastion 6500/Wheeler 3000)

"Next, I'll summon Solar Flare Dragon (1500/1000) in attack mode." A serpentine dragon slithered onto the field, its scales made of burning coals and a fiery mane wrapping around its nearly ten meter long body. "I shall set a card and end my turn, which activates my new monster's effect! During each of my end phases, you take five hundred points of damage. Has that line gotten old yet?" Bastion asked facetiously as his opponent was burned once more. (Bastion 6500/Wheeler 2500)

I looked up from my phone in interest. Turns out the world news isn't very interesting when you've already lived through this time period once. Watching Bastion pick apart this opponent of his was, though.

"You pay! You pay!" Wheeler was jumping up and down now- it looked like he was a little overwhelmed. I think Bastion only needs one more turn to put this one away.

"I draw!" Wheeler cried. "I summon Beast King Barbaros in attack mode! No tributes!" That meant its attack points would only be 1900 rather than 3000. Next to the Berserk Gorilla came a twelve-feet tall beast-warrior. Its fur was brown, but it had shock of white-blonde hair for a mane. Adorned on its humanoid body were golden armaments- in its hands were a blue shield and a spiraling red lance.

"Now, annoying Solar Flare Dragon get smashed! Berserk Gorilla attacks!" Wheeler growled.

"I activate my face-down card, Backfire. Now, each time a Fire monster I control is destroyed, you take five hundred points of damage. Ah, now even I'm tired of saying those words!" Bastion chuckled dryly. Although the attack connected, Bastion had plenty of life points to spare- his opponent, not so much. They both ended up taking five hundred each. (Bastion 6000/Wheeler 2000)

With considerable frustration, Wheeler announced, "Barbaros, attack Fire Princess!" Bastion's monster was speared, causing Bastion and Wheeler to take more damage. (Bastion 5300/Wheeler 1500)

At this point, Jones and Wilson were sitting down and eating out of a bag of sunflower seeds, seemingly forgetting the nature of their job for a while. Shrugging, I decided to walk over and join them. No words were exchanged between us, but Wilson offered me some seeds all the same. I took some and chewed on them, letting my mind go adrift again. Bastion had this one in the bag anyways.

"Alright, I need a good draw here…splendid! First, I gain five hundred points from Solemn Wishes." (Bastion 5800/Wheeler 1500)

I looked out at the sea- it was another clear blue day here, but off in the distance, a storm moved to the east. It wouldn't hit us by a long shot, but I liked to see how tall the thundercloud was. What was the scientific term for them, Cumulonimbus? Something like that.

"Next, I'll play Card of Sanctity, allowing us both to draw until we have six cards in our hands!" Since Bastion drew again, he gained an additional five hundred life points from Solemn Wishes. Contrary to popular belief, the card did not give you five hundred for each card you draw, just the five hundred per draw effect, if that makes sense.

Man, I wonder why Jasmine doesn't seem to like me very much. Funny enough, if you took out the 's' and the 'n', we had the same name. And yet here I was, over here trying to chill out, and she kept shooting dirty looks every time our eyes met. Maybe I would ask her later.

"Time to solve your equation, Wheeler! I activate Tremendous Fire. This card deals a thousand points of damage to you and five hundred to me!" A blazing inferno suddenly overtook the field, briefly diverting my attention from the sea. In a moment, I was distracted again. (Bastion 5300/Wheeler 500)

"This is it! I summon Flame Ruler (1500/1600) in attack mode." This next monster was a bit strange in its appearance- it was a man hewn out of tiki wood, a statue come to life. Little flames and sparks danced dangerously around its body.

"Now, I attack your Beast King Barbaros with my Flame Ruler!" Bastion sent his monster to battle, even though it was weaker.

"Does not compute! Does not compute!" Wheeler clutched his head in confusion as Bastion's monster was speared by the Beast King. (Bastion 4900/Wheeler 500)

"Don't worry, this will all make sense now. Since my monster was destroyed by battle, by Backfire trap still goes off, meaning that you lose the rest of your life points, Wheeler." Bastion said clinically.

With a rather hilariously confused howl, an explosion suddenly went off in front of Wheeler, causing the monkey to fall on his little tushie. (Bastion 4900/Wheeler 0)

"You fought valiantly, but I'm afraid this conclusion was inevitable. My math is rarely incorrect." Bastion said diplomatically. He even extended a hand to help the monkey up. Wheeler took it, seeming somewhat confused at the gesture. There was rarely a place for such mercy in the wild, or in the laboratory for that matter.

"Man, that kid really gave Wheeler the business. I think our work might be incomplete." Jones said, impressed.

"Nah." I replied, the ending of the duel bringing me back to myself. "This duel was in the books as soon as I told Bastion what deck Wheeler was using. He's not your average duelist; this kid spends all hours of the day poring over formulas to create the optimal deck for any situation."

"I see that." Wilson responded. "By the way, how could you have possibly known what sort of deck Wheeler was using? How much do you know?" He asked suspiciously.

"More than you could possibly imagine." I thought. "It was honestly a wild guess. I figured it would be easier to get Wheeler to duel if he used cards that looked like him." Was what I hastily said to cover my tracks.

"Oh, so you were talking out of your ass, is that it? Man, kids these days sure are cocky." Jones laughed harshly.

"Whatever you say, pal." I muttered.

"Well, are you sufficiently impressed, Jasmine?" Bastion said cordially, helping the lady up. She had gotten out of Wheeler's path- the monkey was too shocked at the outcome of the duel to keep an eye on her. For her part, Jasmine seemed to be looking at him in a new light. I couldn't blame her- the way Bastion handled that duel was pretty impressive. Sure, he was dueling a literal monkey, but he also managed to select the optimal counter for Wheeler's deck based purely on the tertiary knowledge that it was a beast deck. He never lost control of the match once- it was more like watching the steps of a complicated math problem than it was a fight.

"Wow, that was really something. You duel like no one else…that was really smart stuff!" She said, brushing back a strand of her ginger hair. Hey, she does appreciate intelligence! What a relief.

"I owe much of my success to my friend, Jamie. He clued me in on which deck I would be facing. I imagine it was a guess, but his hypothesis appeared to be correct. After that, it was merely a point of executing the proper strategy." Bastion said matter-of-factly. Wow, slow down tiger, don't get too mushy with her! Man, I don't get why all of my friends were so unromantic. I mean I know they were high school boys, but good lord. Then again, I guess Bastion did land himself a wife (life partner?) in canon, but those were weird circumstances to say the least. Come to think of it, that business with Tania puts a whole new spin on the phrase "slow down, tiger". I cringed.

"Nonsense, this was basically all Bastion. This guy's an absolute beast, Jasmine, a real galaxy brain on this kid." I threw my arm around Bastion in a chummy fashion, causing him to stiffen.

"Look, this is your chance, just follow my lead." I whispered in Bastion's ear. With a confused expression, he nodded.

"You know Jasmine, Bastion's one of the best duelists in the school. He's even beaten me in a duel before!" I lied. Bastion looked baffled at first, but he managed to school his features soon enough.

"Yeah, right!" Jasmine scoffed.

"Erm, yes, it's true. In fact, I've developed a formula on how to completely destroy Jamie's deck. Really, defeating him was child's play." Bastion puffed.

Alright, now he was laying it on a bit thick. My grip on his shoulder tightened, even as we both still smiled like idiots.

"But that's a story for another time, my dear. We should, um, hang out together sometime. I can tell you all about it then!" Bastion said with some refreshing confidence. There you go, man!

She weighed her options for a moment, but ultimately relented. "Fine…we'll go get coffee, ok?" She suggested, seemingly against her better judgment. Hey, a win's a win!

Bastion smiled widely. "That sounds wonderful, Jasmine. Now then, why don't we all-"

He was cut off by the sound of a tranquilizer gun firing, a loud pop that caused Jasmine to shriek and hold onto Bastion's arm. All three of us turned around to find that Wheeler had keeled over, fast asleep from the dart in his leg. I can't believe I had nearly forgotten about this shady research project!

"So, where do you gentlemen think you're off too?" I ask, causing the two suits to pause.

"We were just gonna bring Wheeler back to the lab and pretend like none of this ever happened. You should do the same." Jones said coldly.

"I take objection with your suggestion, sirs. Before you do anything, I would like to know the extent of these experiments you're conducting, as well as their legality!" Bastion contended.

This seemed to be an uncomfortable question for the two men, judging by the way they halted in their tracks as though someone just pressed pause on the remote control. Wheeler, strangely enough, seemed rather docile in the face of defeat. It was as though he was leaving his fate up to the "alphas", so to speak.

"I don't even want to know the extent of these experiments. The secretive nature of the laboratory and the hasty nature of this escape are evidence enough." I said, still waiting for their response.

"Look, this is above our pay grade- we weren't told the exact nature of the experiments when we took this job, we were only hired to keep watch of personnel coming in and out of the lab. Look, if you want us to contact mister Kaiba about this, then we can." Wilson capitulated, knowing that a few wrong words could turn this incident into a media shitstorm for Kaibacorp.

The three of us nodded, and Jones started dialing, looking increasingly nervous as he did so. As the phone began to ring, he put it on speaker so that each of us could hear what Kaiba would say. This seemed strange- these guys were supposedly low on the totem pole, and yet they had access to Seto Kaiba's phone number? How strange.

After about five rings, I was sure that Kaiba wouldn't pick up, but on the sixth ring, I heard a voice. Suddenly, I was filled with anticipation- was I really going to speak to Seto Kaiba himself?

"Hello?" A distinctly feminine, sweet voice picked up. Okay, what the frig?

"Umm, is this the right number? We're trying to speak with Seto Kaiba." Jones said uncertainly.

"Mister Kaiba cannot come to the phone right now, he's a little, ah, tied up at the moment." The sultry voice replied, causing Jones to tug at his collar nervously.

"Okay, we'll just call back later then." He muttered.

"No, no, no." I cut in impatiently. "We need to talk to mister Kaiba now. This is a sensitive matter that is of great interest to his company's standing." Bastion and Jasmine tried to shush me, but perhaps foolishly I ignored them.

"Hmm…well, I'll see what I can do." She responded, somewhat taken aback from my aggressive tone. Over the phone, we heard the telltale frantic sounds of someone getting ready to meet an unexpected visitor.

"Where in the hell is this call coming from?" Came a frazzled voice. Not the first words I would have expected to hear from Seto Kaiba in this world, but beggars can't be choosers. I couldn't believe I was really speaking to this man, especially because of a dueling monkey. The absurdity of life never fails to make me laugh.

Shaking in his boots, Jones answered, "Um, uh, sir, we're the security guards for the Wheeler Project, we were just hoping to talk to you about-"

"Wait a minute, you guys are Kaibacorp employees? How did you get this number? This is my burner phone!" Kaiba barked.

"Um, sir, this is the number on all of our official paperwork! Hasn't anyone called you from the laboratory before?" Jones hastily questioned.

"Oh, that was a mistake…um, I mean that was a calculated move! Anyways, why are you calling? I only told your superiors to call me when there was an issue…what happened?" Kaiba asked testily.

"Umm, well, nothing major really, just ah…. how do I put this…? Wheeler broke out of the lab and kidnapped a student."

"WHAT?!"

"But luckily, the situation has been completely resolved. The student has been rescued with no injuries to her person, and we have successfully subdued Wheeler." Wilson jumped in with the save.

"So why are you calling me? I was in a very important meeting with a reporter from the Daily Duelist." In the background, I vaguely heard the woman from earlier pouring wine.

"Well sir, in all honesty, two other students in the area helped us find Wheeler in the first place. One of them even beat Wheeler in a duel, which gave us an opening to sedate the monkey. The students were really hoping to speak with you-" Again, Jones found himself interrupted as I snatched the phone out of his hand.

"Hello Mister Kaiba, I'm so sorry to barge in in your interview, it sounds most productive. My name is Jamie Lancaster, I am an Obelisk Blue freshman at Central Duel Academy." I greeted.

"Obelisk Blue, eh? Good man. I take it you were the duelist that took down Wheeler?" Kaiba asked casually.

"No, that honor goes to my friend and former roommate, a Ra Yellow by the name of Bastion Misawa." I replied.

"Hello, mister Kaiba. I regret having to meet under such strange circumstances." The mathematician said humbly.

"Yeah, yeah. So, what's your question?" Kaiba said shortly, evidently no longer in the mood for pleasantries.

"We were simply going to inquire into the legality of these experiments your men have been conducting on the island. The amount of secrecy here seems troubling." Bastion asked.

I could practically hear Kaiba pinching the bridge of his nose. For a while, no one said anything, waiting on Kaiba's seemingly forthcoming response. When one came, I contributed, "It's not legal, is it mister Kaiba?'

"Oh, very well. I suppose you three will be wanting your bribes, then. Tell you what, I have a few options for you- I have this nice washer-dryer combo, a brand new box of the latest card pack, a summer internship at Kaibacorp, or a mystery item. Take your pick!" Kaiba said lazily.

"Honestly mister Kaiba, I'm not sure this is necessary. I think we would all be pleased if you could simply release these monkeys and shut down this clearly unethical operation. That would be reward enough." Bastion replied humbly.

"Speak for yourself!" I grab the phone out of Wilson's hand, an unnecessary move since we were on speaker. "What was that about a summer internship at Kaibacorp again?" I questioned hastily.

"It practically secures starting level positions in our accounting, R&D, and Information Systems positions, along with good starting wages during the internship itself. Academy students also receive a monthly stipend to pay for room and board." Kaiba explained quickly.

"Wow, that sounds perfect! What's the catch?" I asked.

"The catch is that I'm not stupid enough to bargain with literal children like yourselves. If the monkey could be beaten by an academy freshman, clearly the costs of this project outweigh the benefits. I thought this could revolutionize the field of artificial intelligence, but it seems we are still a few years off from the optimal technology being released. For now, I'll be shutting down the Wheeler project and that will be the end of this farce." Kaiba responded coldly.

I felt the sinking feeling of disappointment that comes from being played. Kaiba could have this entire project put away before the press could get a whiff anything strange was going on. In hindsight, to think that I could make demands of him was reckless at best, stupid at worst. This man was a master at handling people.

Giving a weary chuckle, I shook my head. "Fair enough, I suppose." At Bastion and Jasmine's shocked expressions, I hurriedly stammered, "What? I was gonna ask him to free Wheeler too."

"Sure you were." Jasmine said sarcastically.

At this, Kaiba barked out a laugh. "Don't take it personally, kid. I probably would've tried to make the same demands in your shoes. Besides, I should be thanking the three of you for providing some impromptu testing for Wheeler. It's good to know that this idea was fruitless sooner rather than later. What did you say your names were again?"

In bemused fashion, the three of us answered him. "Very well. Keep at your studies, then. If you keep good grades and apply for the internship in the spring, I will have no choice but the hire the best candidates for the job. Miss Jasmine, I apologize for any inconvenience caused by your captivity." Kaiba said smoothly.

"Uh, it's fine…" Jasmine murmured, not knowing what to say to the famous CEO.

"As for Misawa and Lancaster…I will remember your names. As I said, keep your grades up. There may be future opportunities down the road if you do." Kaiba said.

"Awesome. Hey man, sorry about earlier. Felt like a once in a lifetime opportunity, you know?" I said casually.

"Jamie, you can't just talk to Seto Kaiba like that! Do you have any idea how powerful he is?" Bastion worried.

"Don't worry, even I'm not sure how powerful I am…" Kaiba sneered. "Jones and Wilson, you and the rest of the people on this project will be reassigned to central R&D, they've been needing some extra manpower for a while. Tell your directors to call me later. I should probably get some sleep…you can get out of here now, Jessica."

"Aww…" the unknown woman pouted. We heard the sound of clothes hastily being donned before the door opened and closed.

"Any questions?" Kaiba asked groggily.

"Who was that girl in the room with you?" Jasmine asked suspiciously.

"No more questions!" Kaiba snapped before hanging up on us with an audible click.

"Man…that conversation did not go how I thought it would." Jones said with raised eyebrows.

"Yes, how bizarre. It seems we caught him at a bad time…but at this time in the afternoon? Uh, well, anyways, it is good to know that Seto Kaiba himself knows our names, although the way he met us was less than ideal…" Bastion sniffed distastefully.

"He's probably in a different time zone. But anyways, I thought that little discussion went extremely well. I think he liked me!" I say brightly.

"Your unbridled arrogance probably reminds him of himself when he was younger." Jasmine cut in.

"My arrogance is perfectly bridled, thank you very much! And what the hell is your problem with me, anyways? You've done nothing but give me lip since the moment I got here! I don't even think I've exchanged two words with you until today!" I finally explode, growing tired of her passive-aggressiveness.

She turned her head and crossed her arms, not deigning to answer my question. Bastion looked between us with concern, his loyalties torn.

"Well, we'll leave you to your teen drama. Wilson and I have to get ready to relocate, I guess." Jones grumbled.

"All I know is that it's going to be nice to be close to the wife again. Domino City should be a welcome sight. It's been nearly a year since we've been home. I wonder if that old nightclub's still there?" Wilson commented, much more optimistic about the situation.

"Yeah, you're right. Moving's gonna be a pain in the ass, but it will be nice to be home." Jones conceded. "I guess I should be thanking you lot for getting us out of here!" he said with a laugh. The strange thing about Jones and Wilson were that they were normal- utterly lacking in any quirks or oddities like the rest of the cast. They were just two guys at work. They no doubt thought of this little adventure as an ordeal, a pointless waste of time. It was interesting to compare them to someone like Jaden or Erin, who surely would have got a kick out of this if they were here right now.

"Your attitudes are admirable. Best of luck in your future endeavors." Bastion said with impeccable politeness.

Jasmine and I took a break from glaring at each other to give the two suits a friendly wave. Despite their rudeness, i bore no ill will towards them. "Take care, fellas!" I say. "Farewell! Thank you for trying to help me!" Jasmine added. We then returned to the glaring.

Hilariously, Wilson was forced to sling the unconscious Wheeler as they walked into the tree line once again. Part of me wanted to ask after them about the location of the lab, but it didn't really matter if the place was going to be quietly demolished soon.

"Man, what a bizarre little chapter in our lives. Anyways, I believe we were at the part where you explained why you're pissed at me." I say, getting things back on track.

"Don't play dumb, Lancaster! You should know that you're not a good influence on Alexis! She never used to go to parties and play online poker like this until you came along!" She accused.

"Uh, sounds to me like she's just getting out of her shell a bit. Besides, she only plays poker against me, without any stakes, so…" I counter.

She shook her head with exasperation. "You really don't see it, do you?"

Oh, shit. Ok, calm down, Jamie. I'm sure there's some sort of misunderstanding here, that's all. I'm not a harem protagonist, damn it! Is it a harem if it's only two girls? Aw, geez! I thought I was supposed to be above such things!

"If you still don't know what's really going on, just head down to the pier. Alexis and Erin are going to duel there. That might make things clearer for you." Jasmine said before walking off, dragging poor Bastion by the arm.

"Erm, Jasmine, aren't we going to go on our date?" Bastion asked as slid along the grass.

"Hey, the ships are going to be here soon, you guys. Not to be a wet blanket, but there's not enough time for a proper date." I said.

"That's right. I suppose we'll have to settle for getting some coffee for now. You better show me a good time, Misawa!" Jasmine said.

"I'll try!" Bastion chuckled nervously. "See you later, Jamie! Not for nothing, but I'm glad I'm not you right now."

"Likewise." I waved him off. Something told me he was going to have his hands full pleasing that girl. I had no idea that Jasmine was so protective of Alexis, especially since Alexis didn't seem to want or need such protection. She and Erin really were similar, two strong and willful people who are still trying to find their place in the world. And yet they had their differences as well. Erin was warm, competitive, often full of hot air. Alexis, on the other hand, was reserved and distant, yet her heart was far heavier than Erin's with regrets, things left unsaid.

This wasn't supposed to happen, she was supposed to pine after Jaden, or someone else, anyone else. But then, I shouldn't have been surprised- I'm the one who has been flirting with her, pushing her buttons almost unknowingly. This rivalry that has sprung up under my nose is my fault, in a way. Damn it, why did they have to wait until the last day of the semester to duel, though?

"Troublemakers…" I curse before I ran off towards the pier.

A/N

Hope you all enjoyed.

I was sick when I wrote the majority of this chapter, so that's why this chapter might've come out a little...weird. Then again, GX is a very weird series, so perhaps its par for the course. If I wanted to be normal, I would've written an unfinished Naruto harem fanfic and called it a day.

Anyways, this chapter introduces us to Seto Kaiba, one of the greatest anime characters of all time. I mean think about it- if you read the manga, Takahashi originally based Kaiba's characterization off this random rude guy he encountered at a card shop. Now, Kaiba is this insane mix of Vegeta and Tony Stark who has built a corporate empire centered around a card game and an amusement park. He created a boarding school about learning this card game, and he even sent trading cards into SPACE for shits and giggles essentially, incidentally creating one of the main villains of GX in the process. What a batshit crazy character, I love him. He will be returning in the future, that much is assured. Now of course, that begs the question of whether other characters from the original series will show up. It's a definite maybe!

Also, we have seen Zane's character develop in this chapter as well. What do you guys think? With Jamie around, it seems that Zane no longer has to look far for a good challenge, which was a huge part of his struggle in canon. How do you all think this will change his character arc down the road? I have some exciting plans in mind when it comes to Zane, he's a great character.

Otherwise, we see Bastion's fire deck in the chapter, which completely dominated Wheeler. I realize that this occurs later on in the timeline than it did in the show, but this chapter really isn't so much about Wheeler as it is about introducing Seto Kaiba into the plot and furthering this little Bastion/Jasmine subplot. I thought this would be a good time to give our boy some shine. It looks like things are going well with Jasmine too! Lucky him. Meanwhile, Jamie has a bit of trouble on his hands with this Alexis/Erin duel. Who do you think will win? We'll find out next chapter!