Trixie smiled and closed her eyes as she folded the letter from Mom Racer back up. The Racer matriarch had definitely not gone out of her way to tell her what she thought or how she felt but she understood why Trixie had felt the need to leave. She also felt grateful to Torie for the offer of sending letters and anything else that they wanted to send.

'At least she didn't get harsh,' Trixie thought as she reached for Speed's letter. 'She could have and she'd have every right to. Especially after the way I hurt Speed that day.'

Slowly, she opened the final letter, her hands shaking slightly. This was it. This would be the letter that would let her know just how Speed truly felt. She knew from Rex's letter that Speed and Torie had grown close and that Taylor had been hounding Torie for Trixie's whereabouts. Sparky and Janine's letters also had mentioned Taylor harassing Speed and how they were getting annoyed with it. But one theme had rang true through every letter from her family and friends. They missed her and they wished her well on her journey. With a couple of flips, her eyes fell on the words that Speed had written to her.

Dear Trixie,

I'm hoping that this letter finds you in good spirits once again. I'm glad that your trip to California had been a blast and, no, I'm not offended that you thought I was uptight about driving. I have to admit that I was but then I was a professional racer and I took a lot of things seriously. Maybe a little too seriously. But I'm getting better about it.

Anyway, I'd like to say not much is going on around here but that'd be a lie. There's plenty going on with physical therapy and Little Ryan (I've been helping Torie with him). The doctors say I'll be driving soon but it's a bittersweet victory that I've gained. I'll be able to drive but never race again. It doesn't bother me as bad as I thought it would. I know it's going to devastate Pops when I tell him but, if there's one thing I've learned from Torie and her friends, there are always other possibilities out there. I just have to be open about them and go wherever life takes me. I'm actually very excited about the possibilities. I've taken a couple of tests and I've applied at the University of Pennsylvania in Philadelphia. I'll be starting after the first of the year and Torie's been nice enough to let me move in with her so I don't have to stay in the dorms. I don't know exactly what I'm going to do but I know that, no matter what, the experience will be well worth it, especially when I get to see you again.

Take care of yourself and live a little, Trixie. Don't be afraid of what the day brings. There's always a light at the end of the tunnel . . . or so James says. I'm not sure where Torie finds these people but they're fun.

Love,

Speed

PS I still love you, Trixie. I always will. Nothing will ever change that. Find what you need to find. I'll still be here.

Trixie smiled softly as she folded the letter. Not one word about Taylor in his letter. For some reason, it struck her as odd that he hadn't complained once about Taylor pestering him. Trixie stretched out on the bed, her eyes falling on the pictures Torie had sent her.

'Maybe he just doesn't want me to worry, even though I'm always going to worry about him. Nothing will ever change that. Still, I think he'll make a good father. I just hope he doesn't get too attached to Little Ryan should Torie find someone new.'

Trixie turned onto her back, her eyes studying the ceiling. The tiles were white, plain. Blank, one could say.

'Just like my future. But I'll tackle it. Head on,' her smile grew wider.

"Hey Killer?"

"Yeah, bird?"

"Where's our next destination?"

"Haven't decided yet, bird. Why?"

"Oh, I was just wondering."

"Why?" He stood and moved towards her.

"I was just wondering, okay?"

"No . . ." He sat next to her. "You sound like you're anxious to move on to the next place."

"Well," she chuckled. "I guess I am."

They fell silent and she could tell that he was studying her face.

"You have a sparkle in your eyes. Penny for your thoughts?"

"Speed's going back to school after the first of the year . . ."

"And?" he prompted.

"He told me to live a little . . ."

"Haven't you been?" Killer inquired, drawing his knees up to his chest.

"I thought I had . . . but his letter has me thinking . . . Maybe I haven't been. I mean, he's probably received the worst news he could ever receive yet it's not upsetting him as much as he thought it would. His future has become a blank slate, he doesn't know what he wants to do, but he's looking forward to what the future will bring."

"Living with Torie tends to do that to people and she doesn't even realize it," he nodded.

"You know then?"

"She told me in her letter that he and Jack were living there now. Has been since we left California."

"That must be what Pops is upset about," Trixie commented idly. "I thought he seemed that way in his letter."

"It's Speed's life. He can't live with them forever," Killer pointed out.

"I know but Philadelphia is quite a leap."

"True but Torie won't care if Speed calls them every day. So long as he doesn't tie up the line all day, that is."

Trixie giggled some.

"So he's going back to school, huh?"

"Yeah," she nodded.

"That's good. He'll have a better chance of finding something that'll suit him."

"Uh huh."

"In answer to your question, Trixie, I was planning on leaving in two weeks. I wasn't going to say anything right away because I wasn't sure as to how you felt about leaving right away."

"We've been here for a month."

"I know. The longest I've been in Japan but there's something happening in China in the next couple of weeks and I want to be there for that. After that . . . I don't know."

"We'll figure something out," Trixie assured him. "This is our little journey, isn't it? We can go wherever the wind takes us."