Disclaimer: I don't own G.I. Joe or Murphy's Laws...
Opening Author's Notes: Thanks to Tirya King for letting me use her idea of shorts based on Murphy's Laws. If you're a Transformers fan or just a military fan, you should read "The Grunt's Guide to Warfare".
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A Greenshirt's Guide To G.I. Joe Life
By J.T. Magnus, Turbo
Part one: Reville
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"You can't do this to me... we're family."
"And as a soldier I have exactly two minutes in rank longer than you do... It's your mission."
Blaze looked at Havoc with a namesake fire in his eyes, "And he outranks both of us, I ain't doing it."
Fix-It looked up from his magazine, "Don't even think about telling me to do it, Sergeants or not Sergeants, I pulled this duty LAST time."
Beachhead groaned and shook his head, "I don't care WHO does it as long as someone does it!"
"Well," Blaze retorted, "Why don't YOU do it?"
"Let me rephrase that, 'I don't care who does it as long as someone BESIDES ME does it.'"
If it hadn't been a dangerous situation, Sci-Fi wouldn't have been able to control the humor in it, "We've got almost a century's worth of military experience here," he gestured to the younger Frontliners, "Plus these skilled kids, we should be able to handle it."
"Like that one nest of Vipers handled it?"
"Damn... you're right. Isn't there ANYBODY we can give the assignment to?"
As if contrived by some higher power, an occasional observer to the team entered the room.
"Some mission on the horizon?"
If Conrad 'Duke' Hauser had been paying attention, he would have noticed the predatory looks that came over the members of the Frontline team.
"Yes, you could say that," Ghostrider said, "Since you're standing, there's an important requirement for the mission in room C-2, would you mind retrieving it?"
Duke's thoughts involved comments about lazy soldiers not having all the needed equipment ready on time, but all he said was, "On it."
After he walked out of the room, Beachhead looked at Ghostrider and shuddered, "You're evil, Colonel."
"I know... four... three... two..."
"'PREPARE FOR TERMINATION!'" echoed through the corridors of the Pit
"Think we should have told him that the Major sleeps with a machete under his mattress and hates being woke up?"
"What? And ruin the surprise?"
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Murphy's Law of Warfare: Decisions made by someone over your head will seldom be in your best interest.