Ramon's Mistake

"Ramon are you certain that this place is," Siroc started as he fought to find the proper word, "civilized?" His light brown eyes scanned the tavern that the four had just entered, and it was short of pleasant. Burly looking men crowded around small tables, toasting at random looking for a festive reason to sip their mugs. Bar maids eyed the four musketeers hungrily the moment they arrived and wasted no time in providing their services.

Siroc, and Jacque felt completely out of place when they were seated, but Ramon and d'Artagnan looked as though they did not have a care in the world. "I cannot begin to tell you how lively this place is!" Ramon said in a merry tone.

"We can see it clearly, Ramon," d'Artagnan said, lifting his legs as a body fell next to his feet. The man was then grabbed by his shirt, and a fist was slammed into his face once again. When he came to, he grabbed another mug and downed his drink laughing with his friends.

Jacque cleared her throat, uncomfortable with the environment. True, she was in disguise as a man, but her female emotions were getting the best of her. She was sure that if a man so much as brushed up against her, her hand would be flying straight to his face. Her thoughts were broken and shattered when a busty chest covered her vision of the tavern.

"What will you be having, handsome?" asked the bar maid. She shamelessly puckered her lips at Jacque.

"Um…" Jacque nearly back out of her chair when she appeared. 'How can men possibly enjoy this?' she thought. Her eyes fell on d'Artagnan who was busy complimenting a maid of his own. In his words, he was being courteous… overly courteous. "Anything strong," Jacque said in a low voice.

Siroc seemed just as fidgety as Jacque when the same woman who tended to Jacque gave him a seductive smile and giggled, brushing his bangs out of his face. His mind was usually too occupied with gadgets and formulas when a woman was in his presence. That happened mostly at the garrison, but now he had nothing to distract him.

"And you?" she asked him in a sweet voice.

His face flushed in embarrassment and ordered what he wanted. She gave him a playful wink and strutted off. "Mary…" he groaned. He buried his face in his hands. "Have they no shame?"

Ramon blew a kiss to a woman and waved her a temporary goodbye. "What was that comrade Siroc?" he asked, entranced.

"Where in the nine hells did you bring us?" Siroc asked, almost flinching when any woman walked by.

D'Artagnan was having a ball staring at anyone in a dress. "He brought us to paradise," he said dreamily.

Jacque scoffed and averted her eyes from just about everything that d'Artagnan was doing. "Aren't you afraid of what this will do to your reputation? Even for the notorious heartbreaker, the younger d'Artagnan, this must do something to the family name."

D'Artagnan waved her off, eyeing all of the beauties that passed his way. "Nonsense! All of France has a great nepotism to our family, and that even includes the king himself. A little encounter like this will be but a memory, long and forgotten," he said. He smiled when he saw her reaction. In short, Jacque's face had dropped, but she quickly covered it with a scowl.

He did not mean what he was saying, in fact, he said all he did just to get a rise out of her. Ever since he found out that Jacque was in fact a woman, he tried his hand at everything possible to agitate her. He had to admit that the annoyances he caused Jacqueline were now becoming more frequent because he loved to see her. Anytime of day or night, he just liked to see her. Even though she was mad at him a good portion of the time.

Ramon placed his chin in his hands and sighed, loving his life right now. For a moment, one could have mistaken d'Artagnan's lifestyle for Ramon's. Siroc lowered himself in his chair trying to avoid every single soul that was in the tavern. "Ramon, you surprise me."

The drinks were placed on their table, and Ramon grabbed his and gulped it down. He wrapped an arm around d'Artagnan, raising his glass signaling his order for a second drink. "Though I am not easy to give away my heart, like our friend here," he said, indicating d'Artagnan, "that does not mean that I cannot appreciate the beauty of a woman."

Siroc and Jacque slowly sipped their drinks plotting revenge against Ramon for bringing them to such an accursed place. Jacque licked her lips, tasting the alcohol burn her tongue and throat. She turned up her nose when she realized what she was drinking. "This is unbelievably strong."

Siroc glanced at her cup and quirked an eyebrow. "Smells strong too," he said. "It would be convenient to eat something to hide the smell."

"But I am not hungry," Jacque said, taking another sip.

"Something small then," then the wheels in Siroc's head began turning. "Perhaps, a pill of some sort."

"That is easily swallowed," Jacque said, finishing her glass.

"And gives off a minty scent," Siroc's eyebrows creased together as he thought of countless possibilities for a new creation. "I wonder," and his words were drowned out in his glass. He was never a huge drinker, but right now he decided that he appreciated the comfort only a glass of alcohol could give.

Ramon downed yet another drink while romancing the women of the tavern. He wooed them with his soft and elegant words and enticed them with his dramatic body language. He and d'Artagnan eventually placed a bet to see how many women they could allure given their different strategies of seduction. They rose from the table and set off for their amorous adventure.

Jacque began drinking a bit more heavily when she saw d'Artagnan flirting shamelessly with anyone in a low cut dress. The simple act of drinking from a glass started becoming more violent as she roughly swallowed every drop in her cup. A light pink color tinged her cheeks, and she could feel the headache beginning.

Siroc picked up his drinking as well thinking of the ways he could invent this new pill that could stop bad breath. He too asked for another drink when he could see the bottom of his glass. He never thought that drinking would help him relax and organize his thoughts. He jumped when he heard Jacque slam her glass down on the table. He gave her an empathetic pat on the back. "You shouldn't feel that way."

Jacque turned to him wondering what point he was trying to make. "What do you mean?" She was sure that her jealousy had not taken a huge influence in her actions. She would never admit it in the open, but yes, she was jealous. She wished that she was the one that d'Artagnan now held in his arms, taking a short waltz around the tavern. 'Wait… does Siroc know?' she thought in a panic.

"D'Artagnan is the one who always has women flocking to him like mad," Siroc said. "You shouldn't be jealous. You can just as easily have an admirer or two."

Jacque understood and let out a nervous laugh. "Oh! Me? Jealous of d'Artagnan? Pshh!" she pursed her lips together. The alcohol was taking its toll on her. She could have sworn she heard a hiccup or two from Siroc.

Ramon felt alive whenever he entered this safe haven. It was not as relishing as Rhapsody Night in Café Noveau, but this particular tavern sufficed in its place. It is not often that one would find lifted spirits and energetic souls in one place at a time even though most of them were drunk. By now, Ramon had finished more than four drinks, but more importantly, he had been kissed on the cheek by six women. d'Artagnan and he had tied for the night.

D'Artagnan half embraced Ramon, the two men leaning on each other for support from the alcohol. "Ramoooon, my friend, I bow to yuuuu in the utmost reshpect," d'Artagnan said slurring his words.

"For you, d'Atagna," Ramon said just as drunk. "I will ashept any shallenge!" His eyes set on a creature that took his breath away. She possessed more pulchritude and grace than any woman he had seen in his life. He danced over to her, leaving d'Artagnan to his hunting, and clutched her hand in his own. She seemed surprised when he knelt on one knee next to her.

"My lady, your eyes have captured my soul, luring it with your gentle gaze. Your hair flows like the soothing wind," he said in his most seductive tone. Somehow, the slur he had endured earlier was completely gone. He touch one of her bangs that fell from their hold, but she backed away instinctively.

Siroc tapped Ramon on the shoulder. "Um…Ramon?"

But the passionate poet ignored him and continued. "Your elegance holds me captive and your beauty stills my heart. Please angel, bestow upon me but one gentle kiss…" he closed his eyes. Instead of a kiss, he was punched right in the jaw. Ramon fell to the ground, blacked out and unconscious. The woman stood and stormed across the tavern.

D'Artagnan came waltzing by and almost tripped on his friend who was sprawled out on the floor. "What happened to him?" he asked Siroc realizing that it was Ramon beneath him.

Siroc had to take a second to take in what he had just witnessed. He hoped that everything will have been forgotten by tomorrow. "He asked for a kiss."

"What's wrong with that?" d'Artagnan asked, trying to help Ramon back up.

"You two must have had more wine than your wit would allow. That woman that he was trying to court?" Siroc began.

"What about her?"

"...that was Jacque."