20

It was late in the afternoon when Nick and P.J. finally arrived at
the hospital. The sun was still warm, and it would become a gorgeous
evening, just perfect for a BBQ and a nice cold glass of wine.
P.J., however, was completely unaware of any of this. All he knew
was that the woman he loved had been hurt. Maggie, his Mags, was
hurt – and P.J. was terrified. Fear was eating away at him, his
imagination playing all sorts of evil tricks on him. She would be in
a coma, battered, at death's door, she would be –

And there was Ben, standing at the entrance to the hospital, staring
up into the sky, his left wrist wrapped in a bandage, and a few
bruises visible around his face.

There was Ben, standing, alive, and where was Maggie? In pain,
goodness knows where – and having goodness knows what done to her.
And it was all Ben's fault.

P.J. was out of the car in a heartbeat.

"You bastard, Stewart! What the hell happened? How could you let
this happen to her?" raged P.J., his hands tight around Ben's shirt,
almost throttling Ben. "If anything – "

"P.J.!" Nick yelled, "Let go, mate! Let him go!"

"Nick, he hurt her! If anything's happened to her – " and then he
lost his fire, "Oh, god, if anything, Mags…" he said, his hands
falling to his sides as Nick wrapped an arm around him, "Nick, I – "

"Come on mate, " Nick said gently, " Maggie needs you now. You can
leave this until later. Come on, let's go and find her, ok?"

P.J. hung his head, before taking a deep breath and going into the
hospital. "Ok."

Nick followed him, with Ben bringing up the rear. Quietly, so that
P.J. couldn't hear him, Ben moved over to Nick.

"It wasn't my fault, Nick. We were rammed from behind. The old woman
in the car behind had a heart attack and her foot slipped onto the
accelerator. It was an accident, Nick. An accident. "

"Yeah, well, I can understand that. But P.J., he – "

"He's in love with Maggie, isn't he?" Ben said, stopping and waiting
for an answer from Nick. "Isn't he?"

Nick sighed, staring ahead of him, seeing the slump of P.J.'s
shoulders as he waited for the lift to arrive.

"Yeah, he is. Very much so."

"Well, he's not got a monopoly on that, " said Ben defiantly. " I
care about her too"

Nick's eyes widened as he stared at Ben, and then he looked back at
P.J. "You love her? You're crazy, painfully in love with her? You
smile every time you think about her, let alone see her? You want
her to be happy, to smile everyday just because she can? You want
what he wants for her?" he asked, gesturing towards P.J. "Cos that's
how he feels about her, Ben. That's how P.J. feels about Maggie."
And he moved forward, as the lift arrived, ready to support his
friend, ready to be there when P.J. needed him.

Ben stood there, watching them, knowing that he'd just been warned,
and not wanting to hear it. P.J. did not have the sole right to be
in love with Maggie Doyle. I care about her too, he thought. I care
too.

Care.

No, I love her.

But, try as he might, he couldn't match the emotion he'd seen in
P.J., the anguish, the raw fear – and the love that had poured from
P.J. as he thought about Maggie. Sure he cared about her, but love
her? Like P.J. did?

Ben wasn't so sure.

Looking up, he realised that Nick had held the lift for him, and Ben
hurried over and the three of them stood silently as the lift
climbed to the third floor. With a soft ping, the doors opened, and
Ben led them out and over to the nurses station.

21

Tom Croydon stared at the telephone, willing it to ring. And then,
in the same heartbeat, he prayed that it stayed silent. He needed to
know she was all right, but he didn't think he could cope with any
other news. Maggie Doyle was – is, he told himself – is like a
daughter to me. So proud and determined when she first arrived here,
with a single minded determination to be the best copper she could.

And she hadn't failed in that respect. She was one of the best
coppers Tom had ever worked with. She'd found that curious knack of
being able to follow the regulations, and to also bend them to suit
the occasion.

Ring, damnit!

In the outer office, the silence was just as overwhelming. Dash sat
at her desk, teeth worrying her lip until it was almost sore. She
stared over at Maggie's desk. This wasn't right. It just wasn't.
Maggie should be there, trading insults with Nick, flirting with P.J.

P.J.

He'd almost fallen apart when he'd walked in on Nick telling them
about Maggie. And then I go and open my big mouth and blurt it all
out. I should have known, I should have known how he feels about
her – and I should have been more thoughtful. But then, she's
important to me too, she's like a sister to me, she's – and Adam was
shaken out of his own thoughts as he heard a sob beside him.

Moving over to Dash's desk, he wrapped her in a hug, neither of them
knowing what to say, but the physical comfort was enough.

"She'll be ok, Dash. She has to be. She's strong isn't she, she's a
fighter. Before you know it, she'll be back here, sending us out on
lost cat chases, making any excuse to talk to P.J. and - Dash,
she'll be ok," he said, trying to convince her as much as himself.

And the Station fell silent once more as each was buried in their
own anxieties.

22

Carol Wilson looked up as Ben approached the nurse's station again.

"Ben, I thought I told you to go and get some rest. I'll tell you
when there's some news."

"I know you did, and thank-you for that, but some of my colleagues
are here, and they need to see Maggie too." Ben said quietly. "I
know what you said, but - " his voice tapered off, as he glanced
back at Nick and P.J.

Carol's green eyes followed Ben's gaze. The two men behind Ben
looked as if they were only just holding themselves together
emotionally. The taller one stood stiffly, hands by his side. But it
was the other one, the other man who held Carol's attention. Misery
was etched across his face, his eyes full of fear. The woman that
Ben was looking for, this Maggie Doyle, she must mean a great deal
to this man.

She sighed, and gestured over to a row of chairs that lined the
corridor. "Ok. I'll tell you what I told Ben. Maggie is stable now,
but she took a nasty knock to the head. She's still unconscious, but
we think she's going to be fine. She's got some cuts and bruises,
and her right arm is broken, but they're all pretty minor when
compared to her head injury. But, then again, the doctors have had a
good look at her and are optimistic she'll wake up very soon."

Nick sighed with relief as her words washed over him. Maggie would
be fine. She was a bit bashed around, but she would be fine.

P.J. sat in the uncomfortable grey chair, his hands tightly wrapped
around the front of the seat. His usual stoic reserve had fast
deserted him as soon as the lift doors had opened, and his mind was
a jumble of emotions. He vaguely heard voices, but his emotions were
on overdrive. She was here, somewhere, his Maggie. Mags. The only
woman he'd ever truly loved, and the only woman he ever wanted to
love. She was here, in a hospital bed, with god knows what wrong
with her.

"P.J.? Peej? Did you hear that?" Nick's voice finally filtered
through, and from the expression on P.J.'s face, Nick knew he hadn't
heard a word of it. "She's going to be fine, mate. Bit bashed and
bruised, but she'll be fine – "

"So where is she, I want to see her" P.J. dove in.

"Mate, let me finish. She's pretty battered, but – " he paused,
knowing he had to be the one to tell P.J., but not knowing how to.
Carol moved as if she was going to talk, but Ben gently stopped her,
leading her away from Nick and P.J.

"Are you all right Ben? You don't look too happy" Carol asked,
concerned for the man in front of her. He looked as if his heart was
broken, along with being in pain from the battering he'd received
when the car had crashed into them on the crossroads.

"Yeah, I'll be all right" Ben said, his eyes straying over to his
colleagues.

"He loves her, doesn't he, that P.J.? " Carol asked. "Just like you
do."

Ben froze at her words, Nick's previous comment coming back to haunt
him. Did he love her? Did he love her like P.J. did?

And in his heart of hearts, Ben knew that he didn't, he knew deep
down that no-one loved Maggie like P.J. did, and if he really
thought about it, Ben knew that Maggie loved P.J. just as much.