AN: The characters and concepts of Fullmetal Alchemist belong to Hiromu Arakawa. This story revolves around the first anime of Fullmetal Alchemist, not the manga. Do not flame because of that small difference, I've read the manga and seen the real anime that follows it, but the first anime is what captured my heart about FMA, so this story is tribute. Enjoy the story. The lyrics are "Need Me" by Eminem ft. Pink, I do not own the lyrics to the song. - Carrie
"Some nights I want to run for the hills,
It's never easy with you.
I cannot reason with you,
But your smile is as rare as it comes.
What would I do without that,
Maybe that's why I come back?
Oh, what I wouldn't do for you,
And I'm starting to think, that maybe you need me."
"Is it safe to touch," she hears his voice, unable to pick out any emotions in the tone. Carlina nods in response. She hears him moving next to her, but refuses to look at him. Her gaze drifts to her hand sitting on her leg. Ed's ungloved automail hand slips underneath hers, the palms touching. She closes her eyes. Her fingers flex, feeling the cool metal beneath the ones that are still human. The automail under her palm is cool. As their hands sit, the metal begins to warm up. Carlina opens her eyes to see his human hand hovering over hers. "It's fine," her voice trembles.
Tears fill her eyes as Ed brushes his fingers along the back of her hand. He turns her hand over and runs his fingers along her palm. The skin tingles under his touch, she closes her eyes again. Ed traces the lines of her palm, stopping at the edge of her new automail. "How does it feel," his voice sounds deflated. She opens her eyes to look at him. Her breath hitches when she sees his eyes are set on the fingers of her hand. "It, hurts. Dull pain, as it usually is after attachment. I forgot what that felt like," she laughs, her tears finally spilling over. Ed keeps his gaze down, but lightly squeezes with his automail hand. "Why didn't you tell me sooner," he looks up at her. Before she can answer he shifts both his hands to hold her hand. His human thumb rubs her knuckles.
"I was afraid you would blame yourself. I didn't know how to say it. There's a lot involved with it," she trails off. Taking a moment, she describes the truthful details from her fight in the Laboratory. His thumb stops moving when she gets to the point before her fingers were cut off. She feels his hands twitch when she describes the event. Silence hangs for a few moments before he looks back at her again. Ed holds her hand up with his automail one, their clasped hands between their faces. "Don't hide this kind of shit. Was this the reason you passed out yesterday? I didn't know what was wrong! Al was worried about you, I was worried about you," his face flushes.
Carlina's face turns bright red. "I didn't realize," she stammers. They stare at each other for a few moments. Both gazes drift to their clasped hands. Edward starts to move his hand away, but Carlina squeezes it. "I like this," she smiles. Loosening her grip, she moves her hand in his grasp. Her fingers brush across his automail, one by one. Her expression clouds as she runs her automail across his. She lowers their hands to rest on her thigh. Shifting, she moves her automail hand to hold his hand between hers. "You know, a few weeks ago I could feel your automail. It's crazy. I never imagined I'd lose another piece of myself. Now I have more automail," she focuses on their hands, not seeing Ed frown, "But it happened. Despite any other facts it was all my fault. I froze, I didn't react soon enough. I'm paying the price for that. I just, I don't want to ever freeze like that again." She doesn't notice her hands shaking until Ed adds his human hand to the tangle.
"You won't," his hands squeeze hers. Their eyes meet, both blushing darker from being closer together. "Aren't you afraid I'll fail you, fail Al," her voice lowers. "Hey, you haven't failed us yet," Ed cracks a smile. Carlina blinks before she starts to laugh. They untangle their hands as they laugh together. She turns back to face the passing scenery, leaning her shoulder into his. He rests his automail behind her, hand flat on the cargo floor. The desert setting of Rush Valley has faded. The buildings, while closer together, show trees along the horizon line. "So, what kind of person is your teacher," she turns her head up. Ed shudders and continues staring forward. "She taught us a lot. I don't know what to expect once we reach Dublith. That is the worst part about it."
The outside of the meat shop appears like a normal butcher's shop. Inside the Curtis house, Carlina sits between Mason and Winry. Her gloves are back on her hands. She had plans to tell Alphonse about her hand before they arrived but ran out of time. When Al claims he is too full to eat, Carlina continues to stare at the table. With dinner done, she lets the brothers talk about the journey. From time to time she feels Izumi's eyes drift to her. "What about you, Izumi, do you have children of your own," Winry asks. Carlina flinches when Mason stands, slamming his hands on the table. "Uh, sorry, I. I wanted to see some alchemy. I'm sure you boys have improved, your friend seems talented from the stories you told," he rubs the back of his head.
"Sure, let's go," Ed and Al stand to follow Mason outside. "I'll come too," Winry stands and leaves behind them. "I actually wanted to ask the Curtis' some things about the area, I'll catch up," Carlina smiles at her companions. Ed looks puzzled but shrugs, the door closing behind him. "So, where were we," she pulls her gloves off and places them in her pants pocket. "You could take off your jacket," Izumi suggests. The girl stands, pulling off her jacket. She drapes it over the back of the chair she was sitting in. Before she can sit again, Izumi clears her throat. "Could you turn? I want to see you better," she makes a twirling motion with her finger. The young alchemist nods and steps back from the table. Her hair moves around her face as she turns. She stretches out her automail arm, in full view from the tank top she wears. After doing a few rotations, she sits. She stares at the couple, in the seat where Winry sat before.
"How can you do alchemy without a circle," Izumi rests her chin on her hands. A shiver shoots down Carlina's back. Unsure of what she should say about human transmutation, she shifts in the chair. "My teacher could do alchemy without a circle, he taught me," she lies. While her teacher was able to perform alchemy without a circle, he wasn't the one who taught her. "You seem like a smart girl. It would be a shame to turn you in for performing the taboo," Izumi doesn't break her gaze. Carlina's stomach drops, her breath shortens.
Her mind flits between the times she's watched Ed perform alchemy. The more she thinks in the silence, she can never remember him using a circle. "But wait, didn't you teach," before she can finish, voices of young boys come from outside. "We aren't done," Izumi stands and leaves the room with Sig. The girl puts her cloak and gloves back on before standing in the doorway next to Sig. She watches Izumi fix the boy's train and lecture on the overuse of alchemy. As soon as the boys have left, the young girl they met earlier runs into the yard. They follow Menny back to her home, where Alphonse scares off a dog. Carlina stands off to the side while Ed scales the gutter to reach the roof. His expression changes and he claps his hands together. Pressing them against the side of the house, a stone hand appears.
Carlina's blood freezes as she watches Izumi's face change. She didn't know. Her horror turns into concern as she remembers the threat she received. If Izumi was willing to turn her in for human transmutation, would she turn the brothers in too? The thoughts end when Ed lands back on the ground. She runs over to her friends, looking at the three kittens and the cat. Her heart swells when she realizes the cat is dead. "Chico," Menny's smile fades when Izumi kneels with the cat's body in her lap.
Having offered to help Menny construct a grave for her cat, the group sits on the hillside in the sunset. As they prepare to head back to town, Izumi stops. "If you wouldn't mind, I'd like a word with my students and their friend. Some alchemist business," she smiles and waves as the rest of the group departs. Carlina stands next to Alphonse, looking at Ed on his other side. Al stares straight ahead and Ed stares at the ground. Izumi's voice snaps her out of her thoughts but she doesn't catch what she said. "Teacher, after all these years, have you ever wanted to bring someone dead back to life," Ed stares at Izumi. "That's the second time you've asked me that, Ed," her voice sounds flat, "Al, that armor is empty, isn't it? Ed, your arm and leg are automail."
Lina's fists clench, staring at Izumi's back. "How did you find out" "-the weight from when I threw you. The sound of your steps. Did you think I wouldn't notice? You fools," Izumi interrupts Ed. "Teacher," Al trails off. "On the roof, you didn't use a transmutation circle, did you? So come on, tell me Ed, did you actually see it?" Izumi turns to face them as she speaks. "Yes," Ed's voice shakes and Carlina's chest tightens. "And you, did you see it too," Izumi's gaze drifts to Carlina. Her chest aching, the girl nods in response. "How did it happen? Tell me everything," the woman's gaze burns on the girl. "I didn't want to live without my baby brother," Carlina's body shakes.
The woman's cold expression turns to Ed. "Teacher. I, we, we transmuted our mother," Ed speaks and looks up from the ground. Izumi kicks Ed in the face, sending him flying into a tree. Alphonse turns toward his brother, but she grabs his arm and flips him on the ground. Carlina bolts between Izumi and Ed. The woman grabs her by the front of her jacket and throws her. She sails horizontally over Ed's head into the tree. Carlina lands on her stomach, gasping for air. The back of her body aches. Lina pushes herself up in time to see Izumi punching Ed a few more times. For the next few minutes, Carlina keeps trying to intervene but gets thrown away over and over again. Ed and Al don't seem to resist the beatings at all.
The brothers kneel in front of their teacher. Carlina scrambles to her feet and stands in front of them with her arms stretched. Her eyes burn into Izumi's, her jaw set. The woman steps forward and places both hands on Carlina's shoulders. "I've decided to trust you," she nods while looking the girl in the eye. The teen collapses to her knees, exhausted, breathing heavy. Izumi walks past her to the brothers as Ed gets to his feet. Izumi bends down and wraps one arm around each brother. Alphonse starts crying as Ed closes his eyes. Carlina smiles and walks away to give them some space. At the bottom of the hill she stops and clenches her fists. She looks down at her gloved hands. The grip loosens and she falls to her knees. "Teacher, I miss you," she mutters, staring up at the sunset.
On the bank of the small island, the teens stare out at the water. Ed and Carlina stand with their jackets slung over their shoulders. "So wait, no alchemy? Like, this is how you guys trained with her before? And now she's making me do it with you," Carlina raises an eyebrow and turns to the brothers. "Oh no, teacher wasn't with us the last time. Otherwise it's the same concept," Al nods his head. Carlina looks between the two before looking at Al. "I have something I need to tell you," she trails off. Without relaying the personal moments, she repeats the train conversation to Al. She pulls her gloves off and extends her hands for him to see. The younger Elric touches her repaired hand, "How does it feel?"
Carlina bends and flexes the fingers, "It feels better than it did before." Hands clamp on her shoulders from behind and she tenses up. "It's good they feel better, but you have to tell us if something comes up. I'm willing to break the rules if we need to take measures to keep you safe," Ed's voice is stern as he looks her in the eye. The girl shifts and nods her head, noting how close they are. A few seconds go by before he releases her. Ed clears his throat and rubs the back of his head, "Uh. We should start looking around y'know?" Carlina stifles a smile behind her hand as they walk away.
The group travels along the shoreline of the island. "We could always escape," Ed smiles devilishly and wiggles his eyebrows. A shiver shoots down her spine when she thinks of the consequences Izumi would have for them if they left. "Brother, I can't swim," Al sighs. "You're right, neither can I. Man, we have changed since the last time we were here." Ed looks at their reflection in the water as he speaks. His eyes drift to Carlina, "Plus we have a guest with us." She looks at their reflection, puzzled. Bending down, her fingers brush the water's surface, creating ripples. "You guys can't swim," she questions, tilting her head up at them. The brothers look at each other for a few moments before looking at her. "Well, yeah, you shouldn't be able to swim either," Al blinks at her shocked expression.
"I'll have you know I am a very capable swimmer. It's been a while but there's no reason that would've changed," she fumes, beginning to unbuckle her pants. Carlina lets them fall to the ground as the boys cover their faces. Ed's cheeks match his cloak as he shouts, "What are you doing!?" She starts laughing, kicking her pants to the side and pulling on the sides of her shorts she had underneath. Without responding, she pulls off her black tank top, wearing a bandeau underneath. Folding the clothes and her cloak, she slips her boots and socks off. Carlina lets out a whistle as the cold water touches her feet, "Aw man, this is brutal." Ed peeks from between his fingers, still blushing.
His relief that Carlina hasn't stripped naked is short lived. She starts taking a few more steps into the water. "What are you doing now," he starts taking his boots off on the shore. She turns around, almost waist deep, a few feet out. "I'm going for a swim? What else would I be out here for," she laughs, dipping her fingers in the water. "Carlina you can't swim. That isn't Al being insulting, you'll sink," Ed tosses his shirt off next to his boots. He begins wading out to her as she looks at them. "Sink," she echoes, confused. "The automail is too heavy to swim with," Al calls out from the shore. "What," Carlina's next thought cuts off with a shout. The lake bed shifts under her feet, flailing, she falls backward.
Bracing herself for hitting the water, she holds her breath. Her body jerks upward the moment her chest submerges. Something pulls on her, she releases her breath and stares at Ed. His arms lock around her back. He breathes heavily from running into the water. She shifts to regain her footing. Her body heats up as she feels their skin touching, averting her gaze from his shirtless torso. "Are you done trying to kill yourself," Ed tries to joke, sounding worn out. Carlina laughs and nods, the two making their way back to the bank of the island.
"Winry didn't tell you that automail is too dense for you to swim? That was one of the first things she and Granny told me," he raises an eyebrow as they change. Carlina buttons her pants, shrugging as she slips her boots back on. "I mean, I'm pretty sure she didn't. It's been years though, so I could be remembering wrong," she rubs the back of her head as the brothers sigh in unison. "I would sometimes sneak out, planning to go or a swim. I never actually got in the water though, I guess that was a good thing. Being in Risembool for so many years changed things. I got a bit too comfortable and I didn't realize it." She stuffs her tank top into the pocket of her jacket, tying the cloak around her waist. Ed pulls his shirt on and stretches. Carlina begins to walk in the direction they were heading before. Al's snickering causes her to turn around. Ed averts his gaze from her, his face red again. "You might catch a cold if you don't get your shirt back on," he clears his throat.
The blush on his face darkens when she starts giggling. "What's so funny?" "If I put my shirt back on, you'll only be pale. You have to gain color somehow," Carlina winks at him and walks away. Alphonse snickers, stopping when his brother glares at him. Ed takes the lead after a few minutes, using his pocket knife to cut the plants as they go. Hours pass and they devise a plan for food. Al walks out of the water. "So, any luck Al," Ed asks as Carlina sharpens a few sticks with the knife. Alphonse opens his chest plate and four fish spill out. "Awesome, food," Carlina grins, the teens traveling inward to make camp.
Ed and Carlina stand in front of a large tree, having left Al alone with the fish. "See, this is where we marked our days when teacher left us here," he points at the tally marks in the wood. Carlina runs her hand over the marks. "You two," Al's voice echoes behind them. "What's up," Ed asks as he turns around. They wince in unison as Al grabs them both by their ears. "Hey," Lina whines. "Come with me," Al pulls them back toward the fire they made earlier. All the fish lay in the middle of the extinguished fire, bites taken from each one. "What happened here," Ed looks at his brother. "What do you mean 'what happened'? You ate them before dinner," Al's tone accuses him.
Lina shakes her head, "He didn't. I was with him the whole time." "But, that's Ed's handprint," Al points at the print in the sand. "Look at it, it's a right hand. See," Ed makes a print with his automail that is different, "It was someone else. Like Carlina!" The brothers spin toward her. Rolling her eyes, she bends down and makes a print with her right hand. The human part of her hand looks similar, but the automail fingers are a giveaway. "Yeah I'm exempt," she chuckles a bit, ignoring the uneasy pit in her stomach. "Well it looks like Teacher thinks we didn't have enough last time. Come on Al, time to go find the masked man and put an end to this," the brothers stand. "Masked man," Carlina furrows her brow and walks between the Elrics.
During their walk, they fill her in on their last journey to the island. The masked man, eating bad mushrooms, the fox that bit Ed's right arm. Carlina nods along as they tell their stories, looking sympathetic. "So you think this is the masked man here again? I don't understand why he would appear. There isn't another good explanation. We should search around," they enter a denser part of the forest. Ed climbs up into the trees. Alphonse wades through the bushes. Carlina crawls lower to look for tracks. "Brother, look what I found," she hears Al's voice. The girl crawls underneath the brush toward the voices. "But if that wasn't you, who was it," Al's voice comes from close above her. "I don't know, could've been Carlina," Ed's voice is closer than his brother's. She pokes herself up through the bushes next to Al, "Was the hair pink?" Ed shrieks and falls off the branch he was hanging on to. "Huh, yeah, the hair wasn't bright like yours," Al looks thoughtful.
The fire illuminates their faces in the night. Carlina sits with her tank top and cloak back on, staring into the flames. "It was a mistake to try to bring mom back, we learned that the hard way. The cycle of life only goes one direction. Not even alchemy can change that," Ed places his hand on his automail shoulder. "I agree, but I also disagree," Carlina sits across the fire from the brothers. They wait for her to continue as she stares at her hands. "I agree that the grand laws of the universe are unchangeable. We've seen the homunculi though, something that shouldn't exist. I'm not saying their existence is right, but some laws get bent. Our taboo, human transmutation, another piece of the cycle. Mistakes have to happen to continue the cycle of knowledge. The same with the cycle of life," she moves her automail fingers. Al nods, "Teacher brought us here to remind us of that, and to give us time to think about the consequences."
Izumi stands with her arms crossed in front of the kneeling teens, "Well, did you remember?" "Yes," they answer together. "And did you realize," she trails off, waiting for an answer. "Teacher, we know what you're trying to tell us," Al looks at their teacher. "It's true that we all went against the laws of alchemy. We tried to bring our relatives back," Carlina's muscles tighten as she speaks. "What you see before you is our punishment for that," Ed glances at Carlina for a moment before looking at the ground. "But we want to regain the bodies we lost when we made that mistake," Al shifts. "Are you trying to regain something you lost from a mistake, by making another one," Izumi's voice grows colder.
"No," Carlina looks Izumi in the eye. Ed and Al's heads turn to face her, looking surprised. The woman raises an eyebrow but nods for her to continue. "I'm not trying to regain anything. I already failed to bring my brother back, I accepted my arm was out of reach to restore. If I could get it back, I would, but I won't be looking for a way myself. I'm here because I like the Elrics alive, and I want to keep it that way," her voice stays firm but her hands shake in her lap. "We know it's not what you taught us, but we have to try dammit. We can't give up. Even though we couldn't bring mom back, we're still alive," Ed turns his gaze forward again. "So, you're determined," Izumi sighs, "So be it." She looks up toward the tree line, confused. "Is there someone out there," she looks past the teens into the woods.
Standing up, the hairs on the back of Carlina's neck prickle. "What are you talking about? Of course there is. Somebody was on the island when we were kids too," Ed smiles a little when he says it. "We figured it was the same guy in the mask from back then," Al looks at his brother. "Impossible, since it was me in the mask back then," Mason raises his hand and grins. Carlina blocks out the conversation, turning to stare back at the woods. A figure rises from the bushes on the edge of the clearing. Izumi notices it as well, "It looks like we don't have time to discuss this right now." The kid stands in a plain shirt and pants, grinning from ear to ear. His long brown hair hangs down his back in wild tangles. Carlina takes a step to the side, closer to Ed.
"You don't know who this is," Al turns back toward Mason. "Trust me, if we were going to send someone here with you, it wouldn't be a kid. I would've come to look after you myself, like last time. I was doing my job, Izumi told me to toughen you up," Mason shakes his head as he talks. "He's a child. He probably drifted here in someone's boat and his parents must be worring. I'll find out," Izumi cuts off as blood trickles out of her mouth, she takes a knee. Carlina's eyes widen. The brothers told her little pieces about Izumi's mysterious illness. Seeing the blood pooling out of their teacher's mouth brings a new reality to it. Blue light shines from where the kid is, and Ed rushes over, "That kid's an alchemist!" "Ed, wait," Carlina runs over as he tackles the boy to the ground.
The boy's left hand is inside a layer of stone. "He transmuted his hand? But how," Ed's question ends as he blocks a few punches from the kid. A blue light flashes again and the kid's clothes disappear. Leaves flutter around and settle on the ground. His hand returns to normal, and a rock slides off it. A few moments of silence pass before Ed climbs off of him, "What the hell? What happened to his clothes?" As the boy lies on the ground crying, Carlina squints down at him. Before she can get a good look at him, the woman pushes her aside. "What are you doing? He's only a kid," Izumi steps forward and covers the boy with her jacket. She wraps him up and takes the kid into her lap. Carlina stands next to Ed, her stomach dropping. "I don't like this," she mutters. Movement catches her attention. She looks at Ed, who glances at the kid before nodding, agreeing with her distrust.
AN: A mystery child? Who could it be? Big thanks to takarifan01 for the review on the last chapter! As always, let me know what you think, publicly or privately. Hoping to keep the ball rolling with weekly or biweekly updates, whatever life allows! -Carrie.