((So, after the first 800 words or so, I was drugged off my face from dental surgery. Enjoy. xD))
"Love cures people — both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it." ~ Karl A. Menninger
Hux lay in bed and poured over the solution he promised his beloved Lucilla. As the main figurehead of both Finalizer and Starkiller with unquestioned loyalty both on and off those vessels, he had absolutely every resource at his disposal with the funds to back them. There were other implications as well as that.
Of course, he would renounce his father. He couldn't abide by someone threatening his companion and he knew it wouldn't stop at Lucilla. If their solution was successful and Lucilla became pregnant, his father would no doubt find out. More to the point; he would not tolerate anyone, let alone his father, threatening his new family. That unborn child would be a target but it would also be the most precious thing to Lucilla and that was what mattered.
The General looked to his left where the beginning of his future line lay. He had managed to coax her from the bathroom and back into bed. There had been nothing else for her to say as such. It was out in the open now what they both wanted and he would strive to give it to her. He held her and comforted her until she fell asleep and had since eased back a little to give her space but his arm still stayed around her shoulder.
He still doubted his own ability as a father. He knew nothing about bottles or nappies or babies in general. He knew they were noisy, delicate, ate often and sometimes had an unpleasant odour. Beyond that, he was ignorant. However, if Lucilla craved a child; there must have been something more to it. He (barely) remembered how his mother had doted on him before she died and he had absolutely no uncertainty that Lucilla would be exactly the same.
With that in mind, he would, of course, strive to be a better man than his father. He would attempt to be more involved with his children than Hux Senior had been; then again, that wouldn't have been difficult. Orion had been little more than the insurance policy that Lucilla had mentioned before. His own father probably expected his grandchildren to be the same. But timid and all as his Lucilla was, he knew she wouldn't allow such bullying.
When his little dove shifted in her sleep and a blissful sigh disturbed the silence around them, he watched her for a moment and stroked her arm ever so gently as a reassurance even in the depths of her slumber. He'd made her a promise and he would be hell bent on keeping it if it killed him. She had done so much for him, how could he not?
He couldn't pinpoint from where in the relationship that he knew he couldn't be apart from Lucilla. Maybe it was the few torturous days he had spent on Crucival without her and judging by her reaction upon his return, those days had been just as difficult for her. He would strive in the endeavour of keeping his promise and usually when he set his mind to something, he was usually successful.
But even if he couldn't, he decided he did want to marry her regardless and it was nothing to do with legitimacy of any children they might have. Where would he find another like her? The simple truth of it was he wouldn't. Whether she ended up a slave or a free woman, there was no way Lucilla would have been able to be anything but how she was now; sweet, kind, gentle, docile. And he adored her beyond belief for it.
But what would she say? He gazed at her and tried to imagine her face when the concept would be put to her. He couldn't imagine her saying no even with the extensive age gap and that their relationship had begun as master and (pleasure) slave. Would she remember when he kicked her awake on her first morning on Finalizer? Would she remember the horrendous circumstances under which she had lost her virginity? What about when he left her with a black eye and a split lip on Starkiller? Not to mention Kylo Ren….
The more he thought about it, the more his heart sank. He didn't deserve her and there was no maybe about it. Nevertheless, he would try. How though? What would he do? How would he do it? How does one ask someone who wields more power than they realize to be theirs forever? To be joined officially, despite the scandal it would probably cause for his father in the Academy? That was a good enough reason if none other.
Should he wake her and ask her now? No! He scolded himself internally and unable to remove his eyes from her peaceful form. She deserves better! Wait and plan it properly! Make it something she will never forget! And he would do just that. For now, he would betray nothing of his intentions. He would give himself plenty of time to concoct something she truly deserved which was plenty. But he was no good at these things.
Before his mother died, he remembered observing his parent's marriage though there wasn't much to observe. He recalled little details from when she was alive that he had missed at the time. His mother was a beautiful woman and significantly younger than his father yet he had little interest in her. She was a means to an end and that end was Orion. She had been taken from her family and shipped to Arkanis to be bred; she had one single purpose and that was to be a mother to the Commandant's sons.
Who knows what would have happened if she'd produced daughters. He didn't see his father very often before he moved to the Academy (against his wishes) but when he did, he assumed the disdain and the eye-rolling whenever she opened her mouth was normal. From his surveyed experience, marriage wasn't supposed to be enjoyable and it certainly held no other purpose than procreation. And yet, even if she stayed barren, he wanted her joined to him. To make it his life's mission to make her happy.
"I hope I didn't wake you, Lieutenant?"
"No, sir." Hux knew better from Mitaka's strained voice on the com; he hadn't even taken notice of the time. The General paced the grass outside the shuttle, unwilling to take the chance of being overheard by Lucilla. The fireflies still hummed through the darkness and providing him with enough light to watch his step since the sky had clouded over.
"In the morning, pass over your duties to Thanisson. I'm sending you back to Coruscant, I've had an idea of which I'll text com you the details."
"Yes, sir."
"I also require a meeting with the medical staff when Lucilla and I return to Finalizer in a few days time. Go back to sleep, Lieutenant."
"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir."
Noise woke the couple simultaneously the next morning. Immediately, the General sat up, pulling on his trousers and making a grab for his blaster but a pale hand stopped him. He allowed himself to be pulled back into the tangle of blankets and his companion's arms with confusion.
"I thought if anyone knew rain, it would be you." She teased him with sleepy amusement and when he looked, the tiny windows were indeed spatteredwith the little drops he hadn't seen since he left Arkanis. The metal of the shuttle pinged relentlessly with seemingly every individual teardrop and only intensified when the storm strengthened.
"Forgive me if I get a little defensive." Her General murmured as he settled fully beside her and slowly started to inch her into his arms. Naturally, she didn't protest and went willingly. She even went so far as to drape her leg across his waist. "But I couldn't bear the thought of anything happening to you."
"I'm not going to drown in the rain in here." She assured him gently with a comforting hand laid on his chest; out of habit, he took it within his own and kissed it. "And nothing is going to happen to me with you watching over me. Besides, you know what this means."
"Do I, little dove?"
"Mmm. It means we get to spend all day in bed."
Her statement was finished with a soft giggle that was flattened into a quiet moan when her General's lips met hers for the first time that morning.
"Is the bed big enough?" He asked quietly when the lingering kiss died away though he remained close enough to revive it if he felt the need; chances were he would. He always did.
"Too big." Lucilla responded with sweet tones of impish sullenness. "I do like to be close to you. Did I kick about? As you oh so eloquently put it yesterday?"
"You did not." Her master confirmed as he amicably stroked the silk of her jawline with a single thumb; it was these small gestures of affection that had taken him longer to learn but certainly enhanced the relationship. They might even help him illustrate his feelings to Lucilla without actually saying the words, an exercise that unnerved him. "Did I snore?"
"You did not." She replied in more or less the same fashion as he had which still resonated playfulness. "But you did not have whiskey last night so I wasn't expecting you to." Lucilla paused and allowed her tender smile to falter somewhat; it hinted a change in the tone of the conversation. "I'm sorry about last night. I just got…. Overwhelmed. I think more than I should about these things and it was still fresh in my mind."
"An appointment has already been made with the medical staff on Finalizer." He assured her; unable to ignore the little twinge of heartbreak he saw when he looked at her on this particular topic. "We'll discuss options with them but the ideal situation is a biological child of both of ours. Correct?"
"Yes but I want to carry it." To Lucilla, a surrogate was a second last resort. If there was nothing left of her ovaries and the child could not be biologically her's….. That was a devastating last resort but she would take it nonetheless. Those incredible blue eyes heightened to his icier ones and while she knew she was asking the almost impossible, the ache was too sharp to ignore. She knew he'd try.
"I'll do my best, little dove. We both will. I'll make you a mother, no cost or effort will be spared; I promise you that. They'll be striking; our children. Our daughters will be stunning like their mother and our sons will be magnificent like their father-"
"I don't know about magnificent." The light-hearted comment stopped him in his tracks and naturally, he took it in the joking fashion it was intended. It seemed the conversation had become too forebodingly serious for her. A slight pressure from the heaving of his chest with small huffs of laughter reassured her he hadn't taken it to heart.
"Well, I do." He countered as his beloved companion was pulled up onto his chest where she watched him flirtatiously from beneath lowered butterfly lashes. He gazed back at her with a comfortable grimace of a smile and was reminded of paradise all over again though to look out the window, their surroundings were almost recognizable. "Imagine my father seeing you with a bump. Think of how it would grate at him; that is the ultimate revenge, little dove."
"I hope that's not the only thing driving you to our solution." Came the borderline unimpressed retort with an arched eyebrow but it was quickly replaced with adoration when he kissed her again; long and passionate.
"No, my empress." He was resolute and purposeful in both his kisses (which he stole at regular intervals as he spoke) and his affirmations. "You are. Only you. You and the little ones that will be ours and ours alone. This I promise you faithfully."
Instead of returning to Finalizer (and therefore, normality) with heavy hearts a few days later, the couple left the planet that would forever be their haven. The past few days had consisted of swimming, eating and making love on and off the shuttle. His personal favourite was when it happened on the bank of the pool. Her hand rested on his on the rebound trip; a silent gesture of encouragement, devotion and excitement for the new journey ahead.
Lucilla was escorted back to their quarters and while he would have preferred some post-Naboo time with her, his duties called to him already. On the bridge, Mitaka passed him a data-stick with a subtle nod which the General returned in an almost business like fashion. He would reward Mitaka with more than just time off for this; this little stick was essential.
The next day, Lucilla was brought to the medical bay with her arm possessively (as usual) in her master's with her hooded cloak; it seemed old habits died hard with her General. When they arrived, the medical team was waiting and spoke carefully (under Hux's watchful eye) to her and explained simply the tests that would be conducted and if there were any questions she needed to ask. There weren't, she was comfortable enough.
He had sworn he would stay with her while the tests were being conducted and for the most part he was successful. He held her hand over the side of her med bay bed and encouraged her to squeeze it when pain was involved. However, when the tests were about three quarters complete, Mitaka caught his attention from the other end of the ward through the glass.
"I'll be right back." He promised with a warm kiss to the top of her head before striding towards the Lieutenant. "What is it?" He asked with little patience of the man who looked more on edge than before.
"Sir." The Lieutenant began nervously as if the incident was his fault. "Kylo Ren has returned from Jakku. A Resistance pilot has been apprehended and is being prepped for interrogation."