Freedom

Chapter 16: How It Blurs My Vision

"Through me you pass into the city of woe:
Through me you pass into eternal pain:
Through me among the people lost for aye.
Justice the founder of my fabric moved:
To rear me was the task of power divine,
Supremest wisdom, and primeval love.
Before me things create were none, save things
Eternal, and eternal I shall endure.
All hope abandon, ye who enter here."

-Dante Alighieri, The Divine Comedy

Kagome stared down at Inuyasha's mangled hands blankly, but her mind was a whirl-wind of confusion and worry. His knuckles were dislocated, his fingers were broken, but he dismissed it as if his hand wasn't threatening to fall off at all. Miroku had found her and Sango in the kitchens and had asked her to go see to her Shihitou. At first she'd been hesitant. Inuyasha's personal problems were not hers and her job was to make sure he did his job. Neither of them were really going their jobs at the moment. Despite that, she was still worried.

"What! Why? What's wrong with him?" she'd asked in alarm, dropping her knife.

Sango had snatched her hand away at the last moment, preventing a hole in said appendage. She'd glared at the knife for a moment, before glaring up at Kagome, who had thrown her an apologetic look. Miroku had interrupted them by grasping Sango's almost injured hand in both of his and staring down at it like it was the most fragile and beautiful thing in the world.

"My Lady Sango, I do hope that you are not injured. A hand as flawless as yours should not be tarnished." He'd kissed her hand and leaned forward until his face was inches from Sango's. "And your hand is not the only thing that is flawless."

Sango's face had paled then reddened when she'd felt the man's other hand, gently cupping her butt. Kagome had flinched when Sango had used her spare hand to punch Miroku in the face, forcing him to release her.

Whist Miroku was recovering Kagome'd questioned him about what was wrong with Inuyasha. What did she have to bring? Was he on the verge of bleeding to death? Is that why Touran and Karan had been acting odd that morning? Why the hell was he just laying there? Upon realizing Miroku had been knocked unconscious. Kagome shot Sango a mild annoyed look. It was ignored as Sango continued to stab the cutting board with the knife that Kagome had dropped. Muttering angrily to herself as she did so. Kagome had left and rushed to Inuyasha's chambers, expecting to find him bleeding and dying. Instead she'd found him sitting cross-legged on his cot, his back resting against the wall behind him, head tilted back and eyes closed. When she'd walked in his eyes hadn't even opened but he'd sighed and let his head fall forward. Her eyes had zeroed in on his bloody hands and she had walked forward, aiming to help him, but expecting a fight.

Instead Inuyasha remained silent as she took one of his hands and ran her fingers over his. And as she stared at him her emotions ran wild.

"How'd this happen?" she asked quietly without looking up at him.

"Like everything else always does," was his sharp and cryptic answer.

Kagome sighed and reached back for the bucket of water she had brought with her. She dipped a rag into the water and wrung it out before trying to wipe the blood away from his injuries.

"Touran was acting weird this morning."

He was silent.

"She seemed upset."

"Good. The bitch should be."

Kagome gripped Inuyasha's ring finger and with a soft crack, set the bone. The hanyou let out the first sound of pain that he had ever made since Kagome had met him and she looked up at him with angry eyes.

"What did you do?"

"I love the way you automatically assume that I did something!" Inuyasha hissed dryly. He flinched as his middle finger was set. "She's the one who--." He cut himself off with a click of his fangs and turned away from her.

Kagome's eyes narrowed. "You know…" She snapped one of his knuckles into place and he hissed in pain. "…if it weren't for Touran, Sango and I would still be in Kitanai." She snapped his thumb back into place and he gave a soft gasp as his muscles tensed and convulsed. "Or we probably would've gotten sold to some rich youkai and ended up being raped every other night."

Without even trying to be gentle, she flipped Inuyasha's hand over so that it was facing palm up and ran her fingers over his. "Can you move any of them?"

He clenched his hand into a fist and there were a number of soft cracks as all of his joints popped back into place. Kagome pulled his hand back into hers and worked on wrapping linen strips that she had brought with her over his fingers and knuckles, then his palm and wrist. Silence descended upon them and Kagome sighed before risking a peek at Inuyasha through her bangs. He was staring at her with a smoldering look, but he said nothing. The young woman took in the sweat that had beaded on Inuyasha's forehead and instantly felt guilty. The guy was obviously in pain, and she had already admitted to herself that what he and Touran did was none of her business. She'd had no right to hurt him like that.

"I'm sorry Inuyasha. I--,"

"I hardly knew him ya know."

Kagome frowned in confusion and sat back to stare at Inuyasha questionably. His eyes never left hers and Kagome couldn't look away.

"Who?"

"My father. I never knew him but I guess I must look like him or something, because all I've been hearing lately is how alike we are." The hanyou's eyes narrowed. "Touran knew him and that's the only reason I'm here. She promised the old man that she'd look after me or some shit."

Kagome opened her mouth to ask what that had to do with anything but stopped herself. Inuyasha was an enigma. One moment he was silent and withdrawn but now it seemed like he wanted to talk to someone. She might have been taking advantage of the situation, but at that moment she didn't really care. The puzzle that was Inuyasha would have a few more pieces by the end of this, of that Kagome was sure.

"I didn't know the bastard and I'm damn sure I don't want to be compared to him for my whole life."

"You don't have to be," Kagome found herself saying soothingly.

The hanyou snorted and quickly uncurled himself, before getting to his feet. He began to pace around the small room as Kagome watched him from her kneeling position by the bed. He muttered angrily to himself as he did so. Kagome couldn't hear exactly what he was saying, but she saw his eyes turn dark molten amber. A frigid blankness so cold it was hot bled into his gaze and he suddenly stopped moving. He stared down at the ground before he suddenly threw his untreated fist into the wall. When he pulled his fist away a bright smear of fresh blood was left behind on the rough green stone.

"Inuyasha! What--?"

He cut her off with a sharp snarl and his gaze snapped up to bore into hers. Kagome took a step back in fear before she managed to catch herself and stopped.

"Leave!" he hissed sharply.

"I'm not going anywhere. You're hurt."

"I'm not in the mood, girl!"

"I could care less. I don't know why you're so angry and miserable and sad all the time. Why are you like this? I haven't done anything to you but try to help you." Her voice had started out sharp but by the time she had stopped it had become soft, almost a whisper.

The hanyou glared at her, his eyes a hellfire of emotion. He looked older than anyone she had ever met at that moment, and so unbelievably sad. "I don't need help. I don't need anything from anyone. Not you, and especially not her," he growled sharply, turning away from her. Kagome frowned in confusion.

"Who do you mean?" She remembered Inuyasha's venom towards the information about Touran's upset and her frown deepened. "You mean Touran?"

He eyed her angrily and his upper lip curled back into a snarl. "Get the fuck out of here!" He yelled, causing Kagome to take another step back.

She scowled and stilled again, her arms crossed. Her expression settled into one of complete and utter defiance and stubbornness. It was clear that she had no intention of going anywhere. The hanyou's face flushed and his damaged hands clenched at his sides. Kagome's eyes flicked to said hands, before resting on his face once more.

"Leave!"

"No."

"Fine! You fucking stay here! I'll leave!"

He moved to walk past her and violently slammed the door open only to almost walk into Karan. The hyou youkai stared at him impassively in face of his anger and he snarled at her as he tried to walk past her as well. His eyes narrowed in slits when she sidestepped into his path.

"Move," he hissed angrily.

"Is that a command my Lord?" she asked dryly. She saw Kagome's eyebrows rise from over Inuyasha's shoulder and gave the young woman a little smile. Kagome stared back at her with narrowed eyes, suspicious.

At Karan's words Inuyasha stilled, his face draining of all color. "Don't call me that."

"Why not? Are you afraid of what your father left for you? Is that why you reacted the way you did? Is that why you vented your frustrations on my forest?"

Inuyasha remained silent and Karan's expression soured. Her body shook and her right forefinger began to rap furiously against her upper arm. Inuyasha could taste the anger as it rolled off of her and it only served to fuel his own. Who was she to think those things? Who were they to think he wanted this responsibility?

"Who are you?" asked the girl from behind him and he turned glared at her over his shoulder.

"Are you stupid girl?"

"An interesting question," Karan drawled, returning Inuyasha's attention to her. "Who are you indeed, Inuyasha? Are you one to allow the sacrifice of Lord Hoseki and your mother to be in vain? Or will you avenge your family and take back what is yours?"

He heard Kagome gasp behind him but didn't break the glaring gaze that Karan had fixed on him.

"Lord Hoseki? But that means that you would be--,"

"I'm not anything!" he screamed furiously, turning on her so fast that she hadn't even seen him move. Kagome stepped back in alarm. But Inuyasha only glared at her before he spun around. He pushed Karan out of his way and walked down the hallway, before turning a corner and disappearing from their sight.

Karan nursed her bruised shoulder detachedly as she stared at the place he had disappeared and only looked up when Kagome cleared her throat. The young woman was staring at Karan intently, her arms crossed over her chest, and her face pensive. After a moment she shook her head with a sigh and looked away.

"So he is the son of the Mae no Kokuo." The way she said it made it seem like she had known all along and Karan blinked at her in amazement. "I knew there was something you were keeping from him. You didn't try very hard to hide it did you?" she asked suspiciously.

"The goal was to let him know about it. So, no I didn't, Touran however, did," Karan answered with a shrug and a smile.

"I understand why he's upset. What you're doing is cruel," Kagome snapped with a nasty glare as she began to walk in the direction that Inuyasha had disappeared in. "The least you could do is leave him alone for awhile instead of coming to provoke him."

Karan's smile was still warm as she ignored the chilling look Kagome was throwing her. "And I suppose what you were doing is not provoking?"

Kagome's eyes narrowed and her face flushed in anger and indignation. "I had no idea what was wrong with him. I wanted to help."

"Then don't allow me to stop you," Karan said with a dramatic sweep of her arm.

Kagome blinked in confusion and searched the hyou youkai's face for a sign that she was being sincere. She seemed to find it and continued down the hallway, turning the same corner that Inuyasha had turned. Karan sighed as she watched the young Enjo disappear down the hallway.

He stared at the reflection of himself and wondered what he was seeing. Was he his father? And if he was, who was his father? He could barely remember his face, or his scent. The sound of his voice had nearly been completely fogged by time. Who was this man who he looked like, acted like, sounded like? Who was he to run his life even if he was dead?

Inuyasha scowled and slashed at his reflection in the stream. He had overreacted. He knew it, but he was loathe to admit it. The interest in him was taxing however, and he would have loved to disappear from this place without looking back. He knew what Touran and Karan planned for him to do and he was obligated to return what had been taken from his family, in this case, a nation. The hanyou sighed and fell onto his back, staring up at the sky with troubled eyes. He heard someone moving in the forest towards him and frowned in annoyance, knowing who it was.

She stopped a few yards away and he felt her eyes on him as she examined his prone form.

"What is it?" he snapped in irritation.

She sighed and walked over. She sat down next to him but kept her eyes on the setting sun. "Some day huh?"

He narrowed his eyes in confusion but humored her with a grunt of agreement.

"So what's it like being royalty?" Kagome asked carefully.

Her Shihitou's amber eyes narrowed and he gave her a nasty look. "I'm not royalty," he mumbled with a frown.

Kagome glanced at him out of the corner of her eye and shrugged. "Okay. What's it like learning more about your family?"

"Hell."

Kagome sighed and turned to him fully. "I don't understand how you might feel right now. But I know that it must be hard. Think about it this way. Now you know more about your father than you knew before and you can form any opinion of him you want and be totally justified if you hate his guts."

Inuyasha blinked at her before snorting in amusement and shaking his head. "That's sure a way to look at it."

"'Course it is. I won't pretend to understand your situation. I think there are very few people that could, but I'm here if you need to yell at somebody." Inuyasha was silent and Kagome turned back to the darkening sky. "I mean, I hardly knew my father. He died when I was little. That woman we met at Fukuju was my late uncle's wife. I remember her but I had no idea she was a demon."

Inuyasha grunted.

"But what I mean to say is that, even if my father turned out to be some kind of all important person, I would still want to know about it, instead of being in the dark for my whole life. And no one can make you fight for the throne if you don't want to. Not really anyway."

Inuyasha hummed an affirmative.

"You don't have to be King if you don't want to and I think Touran and Karan and Shunran and Shuuran are cruel people if they think they can make you."

He hummed again but it sounded more like a snore than anything else.

Kagome hesitated and didn't look at him as she continued. "I'd like to think, we can get along a little better. There's really no reason for us to fight and all I want to do it help in anyway I can. How about that? Truce?"

She turned and looked down at Inuyasha only to deadpan as she realized that the hanyou had fallen asleep sometime during her little speech. She glared at him as he continued to snore softly before turning back to the now star filled sky. The clearing that she had found Inuyasha in was pleasant and she had no urge to leave quite yet. She glanced back down at Inuyasha and gave a soft smile. Some day indeed.

Translations:

Mae no Kokuo:Last of Kings ( Lord Hoseki aka Inuyasha's daddy)

(AN): Two chapters? Yes I said two chapters. Happy? Satisfied? Of course you are. Next chapter is going to be a leap of 14 months. They're not very important and I feel the plot needs to start itself or I'll go crazy.

Umm…I'm not one to do this—

(Muse: Listen! She's being serious (sits down on couch and begins to shovel popcorn into her mouth))

(glares) I'm not one to do this but…do you guys like this story? I mean I have a lot of other snippets floating around my computer that I could post instead.

A few of you guys are great about reviewing, but…(smacks herself) I gotta ask for at least 3 reviews for each chapter I just posted (3+3 equals fish…six!)

So I need six reviews or I'll stop focusing on this story and try another one. I really hate to do this. I don't want it to seem like I'm making you guys pay me in reviews to write. But I need to make sure enough people want me to write it. I know how everything turns out in the end. You guys don't. So let me know you want to.

Am I horrible?

(Muse: Yes)

Shut the freak up! What's wrong with you! You're so mean!

Read and Review. (PLEASE!) No I don't own Inuyasha. (Is this necessary? It is? Fine then) Fish Heads, Fish Heads. Rolly Polly Fish Heads. Fish Heads, Fish Heads. Eat them up UMMM!