Authoress: I need more comedy

Zoe: That's the last thing you need!

Authoress: And this is my last resort

Jareth: That reminds me of that Papa Roach song

Authoress: Yeah, that was a good song

Zoe: CAN WE PLEASE GET ON WITH THE FIC?!

Authoress: Ok, push the button!

Disclaimer: I don't own Labyrinth, but I do own it about all the happy house friends!

Full House Beats All

Guests Left Guessing

Three empty ice cream cartons, a torn up tissue box, and five incense packets later the group was asleep in living room. Almost all the movies were watch and the groceries were almost all eaten. If it wasn't for Shane everything would probably be gone.

Suddenly, they were all awoken by a click. Don't ask me how they were woken by that. The front door was opening. The girls huddled together and Jareth looked up questionably.

"Somebody is trying to break in!" Brittany whined.

"Alright, girls, attack position alpha," Shane whispered. The girls spread out. Shane stood behind the front door. "Ready?" the others nodded, and Jareth looked oblivious. Shane opened the door quickly and a figure fell into the house. "ATTACK!"

The girls tackled the intruder. They tied him up and put duct tape over his mouth. Somebody finally flipped on a light. In the chair was Sarah's father, Richard.

"Mr. Williams? You're a burglar?!" Kori asked. The duct tape was kind of invading his speech.

"I KNEW IT!" Torrance said and glared at Leah. Leah grumbled and got out her wallet. She handed Torrance a five dollar bill and mumbled a few choice words. The girls looked to Jareth, who was at the moment sitting on the couch reading a book entitled How to Win Over Your Girlfriend's Dad written by I.R. Idiot.

"Jareth, a little help please," Kelli said.

"What do you want from me?" he asked, putting down the book.

"For starters, help us decide what to do with this guy," Shane said. Meanwhile a guy was sneaking in through the back, this was a real burglar.

"Maybe you should take the tape off his mouth," Jareth suggested. Torrance tore the duct tape off of Richard mouth.

"OW!!" he yelled. The burglar, surprised by this slipped and fell on the kitchen floor. Richard, when he was done cursing and Brittany stopped writing down every word he had said, told them he was just over to check on them. The house was awfully dark and that unusual for that house.

"I was just checking to make sure you guys were ok," he said.

"Ok, thank you Mr. Williams, but you have to leave now," Shane said. The girls picked up the chair.

"Oh wait! What are you doing?!" he asked.

"Come back again!" Leah said and they tossed him out the front door.

"AHH!"

The burglar, dazed form his fall got up and rubbed his head. He then began to prowl for stuff. Shane walked into the kitchen to get more ice cream. The burglar hid in the pantry. When Shane's back was turn he was about to strike. Then she opened the freezer. It hit the man in the face and he fell backwards.

"Hey any of you guys want anything?" Shane yelled out to the others. Some yelled to her. The burglar got up to strike again, but was then yet again hit in the face by the freezer door.

Shane brought out the ice cream and tossed some to the others. The burglar tried to stop his bleeding nose while getting some paper towels. He wobbled into the dinning room. He then heard a low growl and a hiss. Looking down he saw a very pissed off cat and his foot on it's tail.

"AHHH," the burglar's screaming was covered up by the horror movie the girls were watching. He ran back and forth with the cat clawing at his head.

"Hey Brittany did you remember to feed the cat?" Virginia asked.

"No, I forgot," she said and started eating more popcorn.

"AHHH!"

-An Hour Later-

He finally got the cat off his head and out the window. He snuck past the girls to the stairs. Suddenly the TV clicked off.

"ALRIGHT GIRLS! BEDTIME!" Shane yelled. The man heard stampeding feet and was then trampled by the girls running upstairs. Jareth walked past, not noticing the man.

The burglar, thinking he had finally got a break, stood up to leave. Then he tripped on the stairs.

"OO, OW, OH, OW," he went tumbling down the stairs and blacked out when he hit the tile at the bottom.

-The Next Morning-

"Who the hell is this?" Torrance asked as she stepped over the heap at the bottom of the stairs.

"Who knows, who cares," Leah said and stepped on him, then continued to the kitchen.

"Maybe he's our new babysitter," Brittany said as she also stepped on and over the man.

"No, we have Jareth, why would we get a new babysitter?" Kelli asked as she stepped around the burglar.

"Please don't remind me of that," Jareth grumbled as he kicked the man out of the way.

"Maybe he's from the talent agency," Virginia said as she went downstairs.

"You wish," Shane said and went halfway down the stairs. "KORI! What did I tell you about bringing home drunk salesmen?!" she yelled up the stairs.

"I didn't! And that was one time! Tequila was involved, shut up," Kori yelled back. Shane shrugged and motioned for Virginia to help her.

Her and Virginia picked the unconscious man up and threw him out the front door. He landed in the front yard with a loud thud.

He woke up about five minutes later. Before he could celebrate being out of the house he heard a growl. Looking over he spotted a very pissed off cat and some of his friends.

"AHHH!"

-Inside the Insane House-

"So what are we going to do today?" Jareth asked he hesitated to try some cereal.

"Well, we have to try Kelli's dimensional travel machine," Shane said. Jareth nodded.

"But first we have to end this chapter, it's getting to long," Leah pointed out.

"Wait, we haven't introduced my band yet!" Virginia whined. Then the doorbell rang. The other girls groaned. Virginia ran to the door and opened it. "Courtney, Mandy, and Tara!" she yelled and hugged her band mates.

"Can we please end it now?" Shane asked looking to the sky.

--------------------------------------

Authoress: Yesh!

Zoe: You're insane you know that right?

Authoress: (smiles evilly) That's just the beginning! We are going to travel the dimensions. So reviewers! Tell me where you want these guys to go!

Jareth: Oh crap…

Authoress: I already have some things planned!

All: SO REVIEW!!