AN: This is an alternate scene from Pink Haired Auror, I decided it was too comedic for the chapter but that some of you might get a laugh out of this.

Ministry of Magic, London, 1/10/1996, 09:30

Cornelius Fudge was having a very good morning, currently his undersecretary was under his desk taking care of his more personal needs while he sipped his morning tea.

"That's it, Dolores, you've earned yourself a cream-filled Fudgesicle," Cornelius groaned a second before the door was thrown open and Weatherby barged in.

"Sir, we have an emergency!" Percy exclaimed frantically.

"What *oh my" is it, Weatherby?" Fudge demanded.

"The sacred twenty-eight families are in an uproar after the Quibbler's article this morning," Percy exclaimed.

Careful Fudge set his cup on the desk, trying to concentrate over Dolores' ministrations.

"Ex-explain," Fudge demanded.

"They did an entire issue on Madam Umbridge, her parentage and everything," Percy Weasley said talking very fast.

THUMP*

Fudge jumped when there was a loud bang on the underside of his desk and he saw a ripple in his tea follow a muffled, "ow."

"What all does the article say?" Fudge asked able to think straighter now that Dolores had stopped.

"It says she's a half-blood and has a muggle mother, it was written by Rita Skeeter, sir," Percy said nervously.

"Bugger a goblin with a beater's bat!" Fudge exclaimed angrily as he jumped to his feet, intent on pouring himself a glass of brandy.

"It also accuses the ministry of-

Percy trailed off when the minister stepped around his desk revealing he wasn't wearing... trousers.

Before Percy could comment the door was thrown open as Amelia barged into the office, only to freeze in horror.

"Good heavens, I'm glad they're all not that small," Amelia muttered to herself.

"Amelia, what are you doing here?" Fudge asked oblivious to his state of undress.

"I have been asked to detain Madam Umbridge for accusations of line theft and falsifying birth records," Amelia said.

"Well, you see...

" Cornelius, if you know where she is you had better tell me," Amelia said cutting him off.

"She's under my umh desk," Fudge said, looking very flustered and glancing at his shoes only to shriek in horror when he realised he wasn't wearing trousers and dash for his robes hanging on a hook by the door.

"Better late than never, I suppose," Amelia muttered as she drew her wand.

"Come out Dolores, you have been requested by the Wizengamot, so step out from under the desk cast a breath freshening charm and come with me," Amelia instructed.