Joy Cometh in the Morning

by doc100

This is my idea for the finale of JAG. This final “episode” would have allowed us to see into the future life of the Rabb family with all of its ups and downs and in betweens. The 10th season is preserved through 'The Four Percent Solution.'

19. Chapter 14b

Part 14b of two parts—(PLEASE NOTE: Read Part 14a first)

The atmosphere, in the Rabb house, settled down over the next few days. Sophie delighted in each new 'big girl' activity that her parents devised. There were no further accidents and she relinquished the sippy cup in favor of a 'big girl' glass, although she still refused milk, preferring juice instead. However each night as Harm bathed Sammy, Sophie climbed into her mama's lap and requested to cuddle and nurse. Harm wandered through the family room shaking his head, while Mac ducked from his gaze, enjoying the newfound bond with her daughter.

After a week of nightly nursings, Harm decided it was time to broach the subject with his wife. As he pulled her into his arms in bed, he ran his fingers through her hair. "Sweetheart, you're going to have to break Sophie of her new habit."

"I know," she whispered.

He pulled her face to his gaze, "Mac?"

"I know, Harm," she sighed. "It's just that…never mind, you don't understand."

He cupped her cheek, "I do understand, sweetheart…there's a closeness that you and Sophie missed out on before…but she's not a baby, anymore. You were supposed to squelch a curiosity, not start a new habit. You know how hard it was to break her of the habit of sleeping in our bed; she can't breastfeed until she goes to kindergarten."

A tear escaped her eye, "I'll work on it."

"Alright," he leaned down to place a kiss on her lips. "Goodnight, sweetheart."

Mac stared into the dark unable to sleep. She was still awake a few hours later when Sammy woke up to be feed.

xxxxx

The following evening, before dinner, Sophie found her mother in the nursery feeding Sammy. Mac was gently rocking the baby as she softly sang a Farsi lullaby. Sophie stared at the pair for several minutes before sullenly returning to her room. Harm found her there, 20 minutes later, curled up with Maggie on the floor. He sat down next to her and rubbed her back. "Hey Princess, it's almost time for dinner…are you hungry." Sophie shook her head and buried her face in Maggie's fur. Harm laid down next to her, still rubbing her back, "Sweetie, what's wrong?"

Sophie whispered, "Nofing."

"Are you sick?" Sophie again shook her head. He pulled her into his arms, and she nuzzled her face into his neck. "Come on Princess…let's go downstairs. Maybe you just need to go to bed early."

Dinner turned out to be a quiet affair without Sophie's animated narrations. Harm and Mac shrugged their shoulders not sure what the problem was or how to fix it. As Harm gave Sammy his bath, Sophie once again curled into her mother's lap and began to feed. After about 5 minutes, she pulled away and looked into her mother's face, "Mama will you sing me my swong?"

Mac looked puzzled, "Which song, Bunny?"

"MY swong…da Fasi swong."

Mac smiled, "You mean the lullaby?"

Sophie nodded and went back to nursing as Mac sang. When the song was finished, Sophie again pulled back, "Sing it again." Mac smiled and nodded. "Mama, you onwy sing it for me…it MY swong, not Sammy's."

Mac sighed with understanding, "Did you hear me singing to Sammy?" Sophie nodded and stroked her hand down Mac's face. "Should we find Sammy a new song?"

"Yeez and a new book…da bunny book is mine."

Mac puzzled about the book, "You mean 'The Velveteen Rabbit'?" Sophie again nodded, moving her fingers to her mama's mouth for a kiss. Mac picked up her hand and placed a kiss on her palm. "Sophie is that why you wanted to cuddle and nurse, because Mama was singing your song to Sammy while he ate?"

Sophie ducked her face back to Mac's breast and whispered, "Yeez," before she began to suckle again.

Mac pondered that thought for a moment, "Sophie can you stop and look at Mama?" When the little girl didn't look up, Mac removed her from the breast and stroked her cheek. "Sweetie, Mama will still sing you the lullaby if you don't nurse. We can just cuddle and sing. Would you like that?" Sophie nodded and Mac began to close her blouse.

Sophie stopped her by placing her little hand on the top of Mac's breast over her heart. "Mama…maybe tomowrow, not tonight."

Mac looked into Sophie's sullen eyes, and pulling back her blouse, allowed Sophie to resume nursing. "It's OK Bunny…we'll work on it tomorrow." Mac began to softly sing the Farsi lullaby, all the while pondering their discussion. She'd discovered the secret to the little girl's desire to breastfeed, but wasn't sure that she really wanted their nightly ritual to end. Over the next 40 minutes, with painful resolve, she devised a plan to help Sophie deal with this last hurdle. As she shifted a sleeping Sophie onto her shoulder, she rocked her a few more minutes before taking her up to bed.

xxxxx

Mac walked into the master bedroom to find Harm sitting in bed reading a novel. She went about her nightly routine then climbed in next to him. "Ah, I think I figured out a way to get Sophie to stop nursing."

Harm set the book aside, "How's that?"

Mac rubbed lotion into her hands, "Apparently she heard me singing the Farsi lullaby and reading 'The Velveteen Rabbit' to Sammy. She thinks those are hers and Sammy should have his own song and book."

"OK, what does that have to do with her breastfeeding?"

Mac pulled the covers over her legs, "I was singing and reciting the book while I nursed Sammy. Sophie thought if she breastfed then I would sing the song to her instead."

"Ah," Harm nodded, "…so what's your plan?"

"I thought Sophie and I could have a 'Girl's Day' out tomorrow. You know, leave you and Sammy at home. I thought I'd take her to lunch, see a Disney movie and then go to the bookstore." At his puzzled expression, she continued, "I thought if she picked out a new book and CD for Sammy then she wouldn't be worried about him taking hers."

Harm nodded, "Smart move, Marine. I guess the little guy and I can bond tomorrow, while my girls are out. Do you really think this will work?"

"I don't know for sure, but I did tell Sophie that we could cuddle and sing, even if she didn't nurse." Mac looked down and got quieter as she finished the last few words.

Harm pulled her down into bed and leaned over her, "Hey, I know this is hard for you, but it will be better for Sophie in the end. You're not losing your first baby; she's just growing into a beautiful, independent little girl."

She turned her face away as a tear tracked down her cheek, "I know…it's just that…" she sighed, "…never mind, I know this way is better." He turned her face back and wiped away the tear. She gave a slight smile, "We'll work on it…" she bit her lower lip, "…but would you mind if Sophie still occasionally…I mean if she's having a bad day or something…I wouldn't do it very often."

He smiled, "Not at all, you're her mother and have her best interests at heart…I'm sure you'll know what to do when the time arises." He leaned over and bumped her nose with his then kissed her lips. She ran her fingers through the hair at the back of his neck, as he deepened the kiss. As he nibbled a track down her neck, she tapped him on the shoulder, "Ah Sailor, what are you doing?"

He huffed but didn't leave his spot at the base of her neck, "What does it look like I'm doing…I'm loving my wife."

She chuckled, "I don't think so…the doctor said not until after my 6 week postpartum check-up."

He sighed and laid his forehead against her shoulder, "And when would that be?"

She rubbed the back of his head, "In a couple of weeks." He rolled back over onto his back and placed his arm across his face. She grinned back, "Sorry Flyboy." He rolled his eyes and climbed out and rounded the end of the bed. She looked up amused, "Where are you going?"

He grunted back, "To take a cold shower."

xxxxx

The following morning at breakfast, Mac broke the news to Sophie. "Hey Bunny, would you like to have a special day with Mama today?" At Sophie excited nod, Mac explained, "Mama thought we could go to lunch then see a Disney movie and maybe go shopping. Does that sound like fun?"

Sophie's eyes twinkled, "Yeez, jus Mama and Sowie? What abouw Sammy?"

Mac stooped down next to her daughter, "No boys today…just Mama and Sophie. Sammy and Daddy can stay home? Do you want to go?" Sophie nodded again, "OK, you'll need to take a nap this morning so you're not tired this afternoon."

Sophie scowled, "I don'n wanna twake a nap."

Mac brushed back her curls and tweaked her nose, "Mama doesn't want a crabby girl at the movie…so you need to lie down for a little bit."

Sophie considered her options, "Otay, but will you way don wif me?"

Mac smiled, "Sure, Mama will lay with you until you fall asleep."

By 10:00, Mac was cuddling with Sophie in her bed, "Now close your eyes Bunny and go to sleep."

Sophie pulled at her mama's blouse, undoing the buttons and slipping her hand inside. Mac rolled away from the toddler's grasp and grabbed a book from the floor. As she rolled back, Sophie again tried to open her mother's blouse. Mac pulled her little hand away and settled her close, "Why doesn't Mama read 'The Velveteen Rabbit' while you fall asleep?"

Sophie whined, "Mama wead the book while Sowie nurwse."

Mac shook her head, "No Bunny, we only do that at night before you go to bed. Big girls don't need to nurse during the day."

Sophie began to cry, "But Mama, I can'n fwall a sweep now…Pweeze."

Mac battled with herself but stuck to guns, "No Bunny, Mama will read the book until you fall asleep. Now, close those eyes."

Sophie cried louder and grabbed for the shirt again, "Pweeze Mama…Don'nit you wuv Sowie wike Sammy."

The little girl was quickly losing control as she gasped for a breath. Mac's heart broke at the sight. She couldn't take the risk of her daughter feeling rejected and finally gave in. Pulling the little girl close, she rolled them on their sides, "Oh Bunny, of course Mama loves you as much as Sammy. Now calm down and Mama will let you nurse while I read the story."

Sophie gasped and yawned. "Sing da swong instead," was whispered as the little girl began to nurse.

Mac laid back and sighed, "This may take longer than I thought…baby steps…baby steps." She softly sang the Farsi lullaby as she stroked Sophie's soft hair.

Fifteen minutes later, Mac thought Sophie had fallen asleep. She tried to move away, just as Sophie stirred. "No go Mama…I not sweepen yet."

Mac smiled and stroked her cheek, "OK Bunny, Mama will stay here." Sophie continued to contentedly nurse for another 30 minutes until she finally fell asleep.

Mac wandered back into the kitchen to find Harm making a pot of tea. He gestured, "Do you want some?" She nodded in affirmation. He motioned his head toward the stairs, "What was that all about…I heard a lot of crying."

Mac shook her head, "Don't ask, but this may take longer than we thought." Harm rolled his eyes. Mac glared back, "I'm working on it."

xxxxx

Mac and Sophie enjoyed lunch at the restaurant of Sophie's choosing, Sho Gun. They took in a matinee performance of the latest Disney film and then loaded into the car to head to Barnes & Noble. As Mac drove, she periodically glanced at Sophie through the rearview mirror. "Hey Bunny, would you like to go to the bookstore? Mama thought you might want to pick out a new book and music CD for Sammy." Sophie nodded back in the affirmative. Mac smiled at her daughter's only slightly warm response, "Would you like to pick out a new book and movie for you too?"

Sophie bounced in her car seat, "Yipee."

"I thought if you picked out a new book and song for Sammy then he wouldn't have to use yours." She glanced back to see Sophie's reaction and continued, "Did you have fun today with Mama doing big girl things?" Sophie nodded her head. "Would you like to have more Mama and Sophie special days?"

"Yeez."

Mac crossed her fingers and ploughed on, "If you want to do more big girl things then you need to act like a big girl all the time. Do you think if just Mama and Sophie went out to do more fun things together, that you could stop nursing like a big girl?" Sophie turned her head away and looked out the window. Mac sighed, "Sophie did you hear Mama?"

"I don'n wanna tawk about it."

"Sophie, Mama wants to talk about it. If you want to do big girl things like eat-out and go to the movies then you need to eat like a big girl too. Sammy nurses because he's a baby; he can't eat big boy food yet." Sophie didn't answer. "Sweetie, do Nicki and Hailey nurse?"

"No," came the soft reply from the back seat.

"No they don't, because they're big girls. They eat from the table and drink from a glass when they're thirsty. Do you think you can do that?"

Sophie started to cry, "But I don'n do it betuz I firsty."

Mac glanced back again, "Why do you do it then, Bunny?"

"Betuz…" she chewed on her lip, "…betuz, I wike just Mama and Sowie time."

Mac pulled into the parking lot of the bookstore and turned off the car. She walked around to the backseat and climbed in next to Sophie. She cupped the little girl's chin and stroked Sophie's cheek with her thumb. "Bunny, you and Mama can have our girl time whenever you want. You don't need to nurse to spend time with Mama. We can cuddle and read books, or watch TV, or play games."

Sophie's lower lip began to quiver, "But it make me feew good when I sad."

Mac pulled her daughter out of the car seat and into her lap, "Oh Bunny, why do you feel sad?"

Sophie cuddled in close, "Betuz Sammy get mowe time."

Mac deflated at that response. She shifted Sophie up to her shoulder and held her close. Placing a kiss on her cheek, she whispered, "Bunny you'll always be Mama's first and special baby. Mama will try to spend more special time with you. If we do that, do you think you can stop nursing?"

Sophie shook her head, "But what if I sad?"

Mac pulled Sophie back to sit in her lap. "OK sweetie, Mama will make you a deal. Most of the time you just drink from a cup…no nursing…" she paused to look in Sophie's eyes, "…but if you have a really bad day and are really sad then Mama will let you nurse…OK?" When Sophie didn't answer, Mac stroked her cheek, "Sophie do you hear me? Mama promises if it's a really sad day."

Sophie threw herself into her mother's arms, "Otay I trwy."

Mac placed a kiss on her soft cheek and whispered, "That's my big girl…Mama is very proud of you."

xxxxx

Sophie managed to find several books for her and Sammy, in addition to 2 new CDs and a movie. She fell asleep, on the car ride home, from all the excitement of the day. Harm met his girls at the car and carried Sophie up to her room for a short nap before dinner.

As he and Mac puttered around the kitchen, he inquired about their day. "So how did it go…did my girls have fun?"

Mac looked back exhausted, "I think she had fun, but we had a pretty emotional discussion on the way to the bookstore."

"Any progress on the breastfeeding front?" Mac turned away and began to pull items for dinner from the refrigerator. "Sweetheart, what happened?"

She turned back with tears in her eyes, "Harm, I'm a failure as a mother."

He walked toward her, "Mac, you know that not true…where's this coming from?"

Mac blinked back the tears before they could escape, "Sophie wanted to nurse so she could have special alone time with me."

Harm nodded, "I can understand that, with the new baby she gotten her nose bumped a little. She's not the only child anymore."

Mac released a breath through pursed lips, "But that's not the only reason…the really big reason. She said she was doing it because she was sad and it made her feel good. Harm, how could I not know she was that unhappy…I'm her mother, I should notice these things."

Harm pulled his now crying wife into his arms, "Oh sweetheart, you're a great mother. Neither of us noticed that Sophie felt that sad or left out. We'll just have to make a special effort to do more individual things with our daughter. I'm sure more special Mommy-Sophie or Daddy-Sophie times will help."

Mac nodded her head, "I told her that we would do that…I also told her that she didn't need to breastfeed all the time anymore."

Harm smiled, "That's progress."

Mac bit her lip, "I also told her if she had a really sad day that she could still nurse, if it made her feel better."

"Maaaac."

"No Harm, you didn't see her face this morning or this afternoon. I can't say no if she's that upset…I tried, it broke my heart this morning."

"What happened this morning?"

Mac wiped away her still falling tears, "When I took her up for a nap, she tried to nurse and I told her no. I even tried to divert her attention with a book…but she was so upset and crying then she asked why I loved Sammy more than her. I couldn't refuse her after that. So we came to an understanding this afternoon…I told her she could only ask on really sad days; I promised her."

He smiled and stroked her cheek, "That's reasonable…you really are a great mom, sweetheart." He gave her a gentle kiss, "Do you think I can help by running interference and diversionary tactics?"

She grinned back and nodded, "That'd be great, Daddy. She's all yours when she wants to breastfeed."

His eyes grew wide, "Ah, I didn't say that."

She shook her head and tapped him in the chest, "See you're all talk…you're not any better at this tough love stuff than I am. All she has to do is bat those big Rabb eyes at you and you fold like a Sissy."

He grabbed her hand and swung her back into his arms, "Hey, who are you calling a Sissy…I'll show you, Marine."

She bantered back, "Show me what, Sailor?"

He leaned down and planted a dazzling kiss on her lips, "That'll have to do for now." He waggled his eyebrows and pointed his index finger, "But just you wait…in 2 weeks, you're all mine, Marine."

She grinned back, "12 days, 21 hours and 33 minutes." And with that, she sauntered out of the kitchen.

xxxxx

After dinner, Sophie regaled her father with all the events of the day. She rummaged through the sacks to show him each of the new finds. "Daddee, we got Sammy 2 new books…one is abow a doggy name Carwel and one is abow a bear name Winnie Pooh. See Daddee."

Harm took the books and flipped through the pages, "I see Princess…'Good Dog Carl' and 'My First Winnie-the-Pooh'."

Sophie took the books back and pulled out the CD, "And dis is abow Pooh too." She pointed to the CD title, "What dis firs word, Daddee."

Harm looked over her shoulder, "That says Return."

Sophie nodded, "Dats wight…Return to Pooh Cornerer. I pickeded it out betuz Pooh is a bear wike Sammy Bear."

Harm tousled her hair, "Those are great choices, Sophie…You did a really good job. Why don't you show Daddy what you got."

Sophie ran back to the sack, "Otay Daddee…me got 2 books too. I got a mouse book and a pig book." She handed them to her father.

"'If You Give A Mouse A Cookie' and 'If You Give A Pig A Pancake.'" Harm frowned, "Sophie, I didn't know that mice ate cookies or pigs ate pancakes…those are funny books, sweetie."

Sophie laughed, "I got a Ewoise movie too."

Harm eyes lit up, "How about Daddy starts the movie for you to watch while I give Sammy his bath?"

Sophie jumped up and down, "Otay Daddee."

Once Sophie was ensconced in front of the TV, he sidled up to Mac and whispered, "Diversion tactic number 1. I'm going to give Sammy a quick bath and I'll be back."

Mac waggled her eyebrows, "Pretty impressive, Navy…" she smacked his six as he passed by, "…on all counts."

"Maaac, " was thrown back over his shoulder.

Harm reappeared 20 minutes later and joined Mac on the couch. He pointed toward Sophie, "She's still watching the movie…any problems?"

Mac smiled, "Not yet."

At that moment Sophie looked back at her parents, "I tirirwed of dis movie." She grabbed her book and walked over to the couch with a yawn. "Mama can I cuddle wif you?"

Mac extended her arms, "Sure sweetie, come on up with Daddy and me."

Sophie climbed into her mother's lap and reclined back in her arms. She pulled at her mother's blouse and loosened the buttons. "Mama, pweeze can I?"

Mac stroked her cheek and asked, "Remember our deal…only if you really need too…if you're really sad. Do you really need too?" Sophie thought for a minute then nodded her head. Mac looked at Harm and sighed; he rolled his eyes back. "OK Bunny, for tonight only," Mac said with disappointment. Mac pulled back her blouse and settled Sophie back to nurse.

Just as Sophie latched on, Harm nudged her leg, "Hey Princess." Sophie pulled away to look at her father. "This is a really cool big girl book…how about you and Daddy read this book, instead?"

Sophie glanced from her mother to her father and back again. She then cocked her head and held up 5 fingers, "5 minues wif Mama den Daddy wead da book."

Harm shook his head, "Sophie my love, you are a lawyer in the making." He nodded his head, "Alright, 5 minutes with Mommy…" he raised a finger, "…for tonight only…then you read the book with Daddy. Deal?"

Sophie sat up and grinned, extending her hand to shake, "Deaw!" True to her word, she nursed for 5 minutes and then climbed into her Daddy's lap. "Otay Daddy, wead da book." Mac smiled and began to button her blouse. Sophie looked over and pointed a finger, "Mama weave it wike dat jus in case."

Harm scolded back, "Sophia Elizabeth Rabb."

Sophie looked up at her father and grinned, "Never min…I jus pwaying…I a big girwl!"

Mac started to laugh, "I don't know where we got you, Sophie."

Sophie shrugged her shoulders and raised her hands, "From da hostibital."

Harm swung a giggling Sophie up over his head and blew raspberries on her tummy. He then lowered her to kiss her cheek, "I love you, Princess…and Daddy is very proud of what a big girl you are. Now how about we read this story."

Over the next 6 months, Sophie tried very hard to be a big girl and a good big sister. She helped take care of her baby brother and only had an occasional backward slide. True to her word, she only asked to cuddle with Mama once or twice a week after a really bad day or if she didn't feel good. By 2 months time, the request became infrequent...and by 6 months, she announced 'she was a big girl and didn't need to cuddle anymore, except for hugs and kisses'.

xxxxx

22:00

Saturday, May 20th, 2006

Bethesda Naval Hospital

Antepartum Unit

Harm was awakened from his dream by a gentle shake to his arm. "Captain Rabb, you need to go home."

Harm muttered in his sleep, "That's my big girl…Daddy's very proud of you," and rolled back toward Mac.

The next sound he heard was a gruff voice, "Captain Rabb, do I need to make it an order?"

Harm turned toward the voice and squinted, "Admiral?"

"Yes Harm, it's AJ. They called me to come get you…the nurses thought you were too exhausted to drive home."

Harm scrubbed a hand over his face, "I'm fine…I just keep having these weird dreams." He shook his head, "I can't really remember them…and I don't feel very rested when I wake up. I feel like I just went 10 rounds with…" he shrugged, "…I don't know who."

AJ laughed, "Maybe you daughter?"

Harm looked puzzled, "What?"

AJ shook his head, "First you said something about her being a lawyer in the making…then you called her a big girl and said you were proud."

Harm glared back, "What are you talking about?"

AJ laughed, "You tell me…it was your dream. But if it comes true, I'd say you have your hands full." He raised his brow, "I'd say Miss Sophie is your just desserts for all the stunts you pulled on me."

Fully awake now, Harm looked on in shock, "What?"

AJ grinned, "Come on, Harm. Let's get you home."

Harm climbed out of the bed to follow AJ, "Sir, can we swing by the NICU first so I can say goodbye to Sophie?"

"Sure, I haven't seen my granddaughter today."

Harm turned back, "Just a minute." He leaned over to give Mac a kiss and whispered, "Sweet dreams, Marine…I hope yours are more restful than mine."

xxxxx

AN: Books and CD in this chapter

Good Dog Carl by Alexandra Day. Fabulous series of books about the adventures of a baby and her best friend Carl, who happens to be a rottweiler. The only words in each book are on the first and last page. The artwork is phenomenal.

My First Winnie-the Pooh by A. A. Miline

If You Give A Mouse A Cookie by Laura Numeroff. Also a great series of books. The main character animal (mouse, pig, moose) of each book always asks for something, which results in a series of other requests. By the end of the book, you're right back where you started.

If You Give A Pig A Pancake by Laura Numeroff

Return to Pooh Corner by Kenny Loggins