Disclaimer: I don't own this! AAAGH!
As Victoria and Butt-Face Barkis were getting married inside, the wedding crashers were standing outside the church going over the plan.
"Buttercup and Westley," Harry's Girl said. "You will need two swords for pure scare factor so the butt face will start screaming like a little girl." She tossed the swords to Buttercup and Westley.
"Should we scream like a crazy warrior while we're brandishing the swords?" Buttercup asked.
"That would be a great touch to it." Random replied. She turned to face Wallace. "Did you bring the limburger cheese bombs?"
"Yes, ma'am." Wallace replied. "And they're ready to explode."
"Victor," Naussicaa said to Victor Quartermaine. "We need you to make your gun go off so you'll get the wedding goers' attention."
"I knew your plan would involve shooting." He replied.
"It doesn't involve shooting living things, you insensitive rabbit killer." Naussicaa mumbled.
"Jack, you'll be helping Willy by throwing chocolate-rum-apple cider bombs at the wedding goers. They will make them all sticky, chaffing will result and they will be just plain uncomfortable." Harry's Girl said.
"Aye, ma'am." Jack replied. "By the way, thanks for adding the rum to the mixture."
"It was nothing, darling." She replied.
"Kiss me!" he said.
"Okay, people, enough with the lovey-dovey thing." Willy said.
"You said there would be angry mob supplies!" Mr. Caliche, a townsperson said.
"Fine…" Naussicaa said. She tossed some pitchforks and torches to the townspeople; she then turned to face Lady Tottington. "You brought your old beggar disguise so that you can knock on the door so the pastor will let us in?"
"Yes, I did." She replied, taking it out of her pocket.
"As for Fezzik, Inigo, and Gromit, you will be doing some karate kicks and other various poses." Random said.
"With pleasure," Inigo said.
"I like to do karate in my time of leisure." Fezzik said.
Gromit nodded.
"Okay," Harry's Girl said. "Let's go crash that wedding!"
Everybody cheered.
Lady Tottington, in her beggar disguise, knocked on the door and the pastor answered it while the rest of the crashers hid in the bushes.
"What is it?" Pastor Galswells inquired to Lady Tottington. "Can't you see that we're in the middle of a wedding?"
"I'm so sorry," Lady Tottington replied in the voice of an old woman. "I'm an old beggar woman in need of some shelter and I was wondering if you could let me in so I could warm up." That was the signal, so all of the wedding crashers including Lady Tottington stampeded into the church.
When Barkis was the middle of his vows, every booby trap went off and people started screaming. Fezzik, Inigo, and Gromit did their karate kicks and people ran out of the church. Buttercup and Westley brandished their swords and started doing battle cries. Barkis screamed like a bad opera singer being poked in the bottom with a pin.
Everyone was hit by the goop bombs and to make matters worse, the stink bombs went off.
All Victoria could do was watch in awe as her wedding guests coughed and sputtered. As the smoke cleared, everyone except the wedding crashers, Barkis, and Victoria were on the floor sputtering and coughing.
"We're still having a reception," Barkis said as he took Victoria and stomped out of the church.
"Drat, drat, and double drat!" Naussicaa said.
"It looks like we have a wedding reception to crash." Random and Harry's Girl said in unison.
"Hey," Victor Q. said. "How come I didn't get to shoot anything?"
"Oh, suck it up, Rabbit Killer." Naussicaa, Harry's Girl and Random said in unison.
End of chapter... sorry it was so short. Review and tell me how it was and I'll give out pin up pictures of Westley, Victor Van Dort, Willy Wonka and Captain Jack Sparrow. Happy reviewing!!!
Love Always,
Harry's Girl 01031992