Author's Note: Finally! Chapter 6! It was murder to word it, and I didn't know how much I wanted to give away! Please…read, review, enjoy! 3
Rating: R, for mild gore, harsh language, and innuendo.
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Chapter 6: Ambush and Emotion
An unanswered phone call to April's apartment caused further alarm amongst the four turtles, who were now making their way silently up the fire escape to her tenement. Their presence went unnoticed as they ascended, their stealth almost habit now; the only thing to betray them being their long shadows dancing along the dark walls and windows, chasing after them.
All of the turtles froze when Leonardo, who led the group, put a hand up to stop them, pointing toward the window that usually allowed them access to April's apartment. The glass gleamed desperately in the moon's oblivious glare, as if trying to get their attention, the jagged corners and points of it's broken body suggesting that foul play was involved. Quickly, the turtles crept toward the shattered window, the shards that littered the fire escape's landing hoping to catch a careless foot and alert anyone within earshot. The turtles, however, slid into the dark apartment noiselessly.
The black of night filled the apartment, the only light that could find its' way into it being that of the moon, it's beams peeking in shyly and coloring the walls. The four brothers dispersed throughout the dwelling, examining the broken furniture, debris, and to their horror, dead bodies that occupied the area in a very reckless manner. One corpse was pinned against the wall by its' head, a blood-encrusted butcher knife holding it's messy spot between the man's eyes, the ski mask that hid it's face covered in dry, flaky blood. The other was reclined rather peacefully in an armchair, its' head bent back at a disgusting angle, alluding that the neck and the spine were no longer connected, the eyes rolled back into it's lifeless head.
Slowly, Donatello slunk into the kitchen area, grimacing at splatters of drywall, fabric, and blood that adorned the countertop, and a third body propped up against the cupboard, it's masked head tucked under a kitchen chair several feet away. Plucking a bloodied steak knife from the door of the refrigerator, Donatello caught his brother Leonardo's gaze, nodding his head toward the carcass in front of him with a whisper.
"A third one."
Sighing, Leo dropped his gaze down to Michelangelo, who knelt down to pick up the shredded couch adjacent to him, uncovering a fourth body while Raphael emerged from the bedroom.
"She's not there."
With a scowl Raphael stared at one of the corpses, trying not to imagine what could have taken place in his friend's home.
"What the hell happened here?"
"I don't know…an ambush by the looks of it…"
Leonardo still whispered even though Raphael hadn't, his steady glare focused on the dead body uncovered by Michelangelo. From across the room, Donatello approached them, eyeing the same carcass.
"Why here? April had nothing to do wit—"
"Donny?!"
A muffled whine echoed from behind the door of the coat closet to their far right, a chair bolstered up against the door to keep whatever was in from getting out. Rushing the closet, Donatello hastily kicked the chair away with a flick of his foot, allowing the door to fling open from April's pressure on it.
Stifling a sob, April almost fell into Donatello and threw her arms around his neck, burying her tear-streaked face into his shoulder. Her body trembled violently in his embrace. Donatello's brothers found their way quickly to his side, comforting the weeping April, who tried weakly to string together a sentence in between sobs.
"Oh God…I-I was so scared…there were so many—they c-c-came from everywhere…I didn't want them to d-die! I couldn't help—th-they didn't let me…!"
April's small frame heaved in Donatello's arms, her eyes closed tight as she stuttered and sniffed. Giving her several more moments of comfort, the turtles led April into her bedroom, careful to keep her gaze away from the scattered corpses strewn across the floor, coaxing her out of Donatello's arms and onto her bed. They all sat in silence with the exception of small sobs that echoed through the room from April, who sat stiffly with her knees pulled into her chest. The four brothers watched her with stony expressions, worried that if they spoke up it could incite another fit of sobs.
Michelangelo, who had been hiding in the shadows near the doorway, finally approached her, taking a knee beside her place on the bed and rubbing her back with a murmur.
"April…I know it's not gonna be easy, but we need to know what happened here. Please."
At first, he was only answered by a stifled cry, her face disappearing beneath her disheveled hair when she buried her nose into her knees. Lifting her head enough to wipes her eyes quickly, she sniffed and cleared her throat, holding Michelangelo's gaze. She could only stare blankly for a moment, seeming to have forgotten how to speak, her line of sight shifting to the floor, her lips finally parting as she spoke softly, weakly.
"…I was just about asleep when I got the call. Yin said she and her sister needed my help. I knew there was something was wrong, if they couldn't go to you guys first, but when I asked, she wouldn't say what it was. At least, not over the phone. So, I gave her directions on how to get here."
She paused when a stuttered sigh interrupted her, resting her chin on her knees.
"I was setting up my pull-out couch when I heard them knock, and, after I gave them the grand tour of my place, they settled down in the kitchen. I fixed them some soup, and we talked, we laughed…but something didn't feel right. It felt too…tense.
"Eventually they asked me about directions to the south-western part of the city, near the docks. They wouldn't say where, specifically, but I assumed they were looking for the old motel that shut down years ago. It's the only thing left down there, everything else is just boathouses. But anyway…after that, I said goodnight to each of them, and went to bed. "
Taking in a shaky breath, April glanced around at the four turtles, who listened intently, bringing her wrist up to blot her gritty eyes.
"I dunno how long I slept before I heard a knock on the door. I remember looking at the clock…it was almost eleven…I hadda get up in only five hours. The rooms were all dark; nothing was on 'cept the TV. The girls were still up, wide-awake…and they hid when I opened the front door. I was so tired…I didn't understand what was going on; nobody was there when I answered the door."
Her eyes sparkled with new tears, her gaze distant as she sniffed, rubbing her arm.
"Damnit, I'm so naïve. They knew what was going to happen. But I didn't."
April's voice cracked as a new ripple of sobs over took her. She hid her face again, her entire body tense and small, like she was trying to disappear. Michelangelo continued to rub her back, trying to coax her back into talking, cooing reassurance to her softly. After a few more sharp sobs, she lifted her head again, her voice now high-pitched as she strained to continue talking.
"It all h-happened so fast! I went to close the door, and I heard a crash, then another crash. And then screaming…I-I-I didn't know it was mine until Yom covered my mouth. Before I could do anything, I was pulled into the closet. She j-just held her finger to my lips and told me not to move. And I didn't. I couldn't move, even if I w-wanted to. So, I watched her sneak out of the c-c-closet and disappear behind the door. That was the last I saw her. All I could do was listen – listen and try to k-keep myself from crying out every time I heard something hit the door. I didn't know what to do. I-I-I don't know how long I was in h-here before I heard you g-guys come in. Oh God…I c-c-couldn't help them...!"
Dread filled Raphael's stomach as he listened to April, a million images of what could and did happen flickering across his imagination, his head beginning to spin slightly. Blinking away the dizziness with a grunt, he stepped forward, taking hold of April's shoulders and catching her fearful gaze, trying to speak with all the gentleness he could muster.
"You said they were going to the abandoned motel? Are you sure? I need to kn—"
Abruptly being pulled off balance by a firm hand on his shoulder, Raphael reeled backward. Finding his feet quickly, he jumped toward his brother, glowering, his previously gentle tone changing drastically.
"What th'hell's yer fuckin' problem, Leo!?"
Unlike him, Leonardo was calm, ignoring the obvious contempt in Raphael's question.
"You're my problem, Raph. Don't even think about going after them."
"Don't you tell me what do to, Leo! You know damn well we should go an' help th—"
"No, Raphael! No. We've already gotten too involved to begin with, and to risk even more by trying to save them could get us all killed. Taking them in is one thing, but to jeopardize our secrecy and lives to help someone who we barely know is too dangerous!"
Raphael felt the hot rage begin to bubble under his skin, his whole body buzzing with irritation at his brother's full emotional control. Gritting his teeth, he kept his hands stiffly at his sides, struggling to keep them from swinging out and socking Leonardo right in his big, self-righteous mouth.
"Your outta yer fuckin' mind! We have every reason TO go out looking for them! I can't believe what I'm hearing! You're a fuckin' coward!"
Looking into the burning eyes of his brother, Raphael knew he was starting to push some buttons – And oh, how he enjoyed it.
"Don't you dare belittle me because I refuse to go out and kill myself over some girl that gets you off! I am not going to endanger my friends and family for that…don't you ever call me a coward for doing what's right."
"What's right?! You're gonna let two girls get kidnapped cause of your fuckin' insecurity, and that's right?! Fuck you, Leo!"
"What's right is doing what is in the best interest of everybody, Raph. Not what's best for you! You have no right judging my reasoning when you lack it!"
That placid look of control on Leonardo's face was starting to fade as he made a slight advance toward Raphael. Glaring furiously at him, Raphael dared him to take another step, craving any reason to slug his brother.
"You shut your fuckin' mouth! Don't patronize me!"
"Then don't give me a reason to, by being so selfish! They are not our responsibility anymore, Raph! They made that clear when snuck out and put themselves in danger!"
"So we're just gonna turn our fuckin' backs on them, when they need us most?! Outta sight, outta mind!? You're so full of shit!"
"No, Raphael, I'm not full of shit if I can take a hint! If they really wanted our help, they would've asked before they left. They left us, alright! They obviously don't want our help! Can you not grasp that? Or are you too turned on by that damn girl?"
That's it.
Red was all that Raphael could see as he came at his brother, shoving him violently, managing to knock him back a couple steps, despite his brother's ready stance.
"Leo – Fuck you! FUCK YOU!"
Unhappy with how little the push affected his brother, Raphael lunged at him again, swinging a fist out, and when he didn't feel it connect, used the momentum of his swing to spin and snake a foot out at Leonardo's middle. Instead of meeting his plastron as planned, Raphael hit his brother's guarding arm, and was pushed away roughly. Righting himself quickly, he advanced again only to duck when Leonardo swung swiftly at him, just missing his face but prompting Raphael to swing at him in defense, missing Leonardo's head and hitting the dresser mirror with a loud crash.
A shriek from April startled Raphael; the turtle had forgotten he was not alone with his brother. Nervously, he looked at the faces of his other siblings and his friend staring at him, their expressions all of disbelief. Michelangelo had put himself between Raphael and Leonardo, a nunchuku drawn, and Donatello was holding his brother back. April had broken down into tears again.
Unable to speak, and still boiling with anger, Raphael bolted for the window, slipping out and vanishing into the darkness. He scaled the apartment building rapidly, squinting as large, loud rain droplets threw themselves at him, trying to blind him, fueling his irritation. Swearing through gritted teeth, he leapt to the ledge on the top of the building, storming toward the emergency exit toward the left corner of the roof, his tightly clenched fist creating a dent in its' steel door.
This is bullshit!
The thought of strangling his brother with his bare hands made Raphael smile sourly to himself, the thrill of seeing that pious expression of Leonardo smothered away all too appealing right now. How could Leo say those things? How is rescuing someone who desperately needs it the wrong thing? He felt like he could explode, he thought as he gruffly wiped the trickling rain from his face, he felt like he could scream his rage forever.
Dropping to his knees quickly, he punched the cement of the roof, droplets of warm rain water splashing, pain shooting up his arm like electricity. He didn't care…this pain is nothing compared to what he'll do to those who ambushed April. Those who tried to hurt his friend. Those who took them away…who stole her from him. With a throaty cry he brought down his other fist, cracking the concrete slab he was kneeling on, the now reddening puddle splashing up more and speckling his face, both fists now throbbing. Closing his eyes to try to push back the pain, he leaned forward on his palms, letting his head hang loose, listening to the loud pattering of rain pummel his shell and flesh with heavy drops.
Thinking back, he remembered what his brother said, about the twins. The girls left them…they went out on their own, without even a call, or a letter, or anything. They left, and didn't even ask for any help.
Pursing his lips and swallowing hard, Raphael slowly opened his eyes, watching the black rain dribble down his arms. He felt other droplets drizzle off his head and on to the cement, the night around him unable to mask the bloody puddle his hands lay in.
Leo was right…as much as he hated to admit it, he was. They left him. She left him.
A sharp ache in Raphael's chest caused him to reel forward slightly, a hand pressed to his plastron, over his heart. What is this…heartache? He took in a deep breath, looking down at his chest, as he felt the painful lump move to his throat. No…he wasn't going to cry over this! He deserves this, he pushed her away…she didn't belong to him, anyway. She had every right to leave. Even if he didn't get to have her. Even if he still wanted her.
His eyes squeezed closed again, trying to hold those hot, bitter tears back. He found someone who saw right past his red mask, his green skin, someone who wasn't intimated by his cold exterior…and he drove her away. Leaning back into a slouched, kneeling position, he stared down at his cut and bleeding knuckles, imagining his hands cradling her white, silky wrist…his hands holding her to his body. He recalled her porcelain face framed by those violet eyes, those full red lips, how she was only a breath away, a kiss away…and how he never allowed his lips the luxury of her taste. Hunching back as the sobs finally broke through his weakening defenses with a violent shudder, he hung his head, his hands cupping his face. Raphael's palms pressed into his burning eyes, trying to rub away the tears that began to mix with the large rain droplets, stuttering softly.
He lost. He lost everything he'd gained in the past weeks.
He'd been so worried about what would happen, or should happen, that he missed one of the better opportunities to see what could happen in his life. He lost his happiness…he lost her. All he had now was his bitter regret.
Covering his wet face with his hands, he stammered another sob, anger slowly melting into sorrow. God-damnit all…why did this hurt so bad? Why couldn't this be someone else's problem…someone else's fault. Stammering a quiet cry, he wiped his eyes with his forearm, weakly shifting his weight so he could lean against the cool wall of the door's hut in the roof, his padded elbows resting on his bent knees, staring blankly at the ground. Raphael couldn't get his eyes to focus. He felt like all the energy and life had just been sucked from him. Uttering a small, defeated sigh, he closed his eyes, letting whatever tears that entered his eyes fall, joining the dance of rain drops that fell carelessly to the rooftop.
It wasn't long before Raphael heard the door to his left open. His red brow dropping sharply, he growled out venomously, refusing to open his eyes.
"I'm NOT in mood, Leo."
Feeling the tiny prickles of anger on his skin again, he waited for a response, hoping just maybe he'd be given an excuse to let his brother have a nice shiner.
"…He knows."
His eyes opened wide when he was answered by a female voice, seeing Aprils' figure step out from the door, outfitted in a large, gray sweatshirt, washed-out jeans, and huge umbrella. Immediately he regretted his tone from moments ago, searching Aprils' face in hope that she wasn't offended. She seemed to read his mind.
"It's okay, Raph. Really. Could I…join you?"
Looking down, his first thought was 'no'. He was brooding right now, and to top that off, crying as well…but when he looked back at April, noticing the dark circles under her swollen, glossy eyes and her ghostly white face, he realized he wasn't the only one who's upset about all that's happened. Company couldn't hurt. He knew misery loved it.
He nodded shortly.
Taking a seat beside him and crossing her legs under her, April scooted over next to Raphael, leaning up against him and the wall, setting up the umbrella behind them so they could share it. He was wide however, being a muscular, shelled mutant and all, so the umbrella only sheltered his head and one shoulder. April brought her knees up to her chest, leaning in closer to him with a shiver. Giving her a sideways glance, he smiled inwardly, enjoying the warmth of her body and the comfortable atmosphere she emitted. She sighed.
"So…"
Raphael snorted a slight chuckle at her.
"…So."
He felt April hesitate.
"They're gone, ya know. They wanted to stay, to make sure I was on my way to a friends', but I told them to go home. They asked me to tell you to come home, too."
Shaking his head, Raphael didn't respond. He didn't want to go back to the den. If he went back, he'd be forever plagued by what could and did happened in the walls of his room. April appeared to sense his tension, adjusting her legs awkwardly.
"…That's not why I came out here, Raph. I know I don't need to tell you to come home…and I know that right now, you probably don't want to. I know you, Raphael. I know you so well. I know…that you'll want this, right now."
Reaching into the pocket that curved across the belly of her sweatshirt, she pulled out something that wasn't bigger than the palm of her hand. It glimmered in the early moonlight, and instantly he knew what it was, April dropping it into his hand.
"The vile."
As he examined the vile, April returned her hand into her pocket, withdrawing something else. Handing it to him, Raphael froze, staring at a small folded piece of paper. It had his name on it, written in Japanese.
It's from her.
"She gave these to me before I went to bed. She wanted me to give the vile to the authorities…and that to you."
Swallowing hard, Raphael gingerly set the vile down between him and April, bringing a shaky hand up to unfold the crisp piece of paper. Forcing his gritty eyes to focus, he began reading the finely written words flowing across the width of the paper:
'Raphael,
'I apologize for leaving your home without proper notice, but Yom
and I have no time to spare. I'll explain:
'Yom has found Big Brother. He contacted her from his post here in
New York. He is to meet us at the motel by the docks, and we're all to go
to the American authorities and give them the vile, so we can finally
be free of the organization and our life on the run. I don't trust transporting
the vile out in the open, so I asked April to bring it to the police
station at noon, when all three of us will meet her there, and turn
ourselves in.
'I am sorry, Raphael. I wish I did not have to leave like this. I wish
I did not have to leave you. I'd like you to know I will not forget
you and your families generosity. Although I did not make the best
impression on you…I will always remember you. I hope you'll
forgive my impulsive behavior. My intention was not to offend you.
'I may not be entirely human, or familiar with emotion, but I am
beginning to understand some of the concepts. I think I understand
what it means to love. I understand that love is not sacred to humans only,
and that many believe love conquers all. I have heard that
to say it to someone whom you've only known for a short while is
foolish…so I guess that means that I am a fool.
'I love you, Raphael.
'Please take care of yourself,
'Yin'
Raphael's eyes lingered on the signature at the bottom, tracing the loops and ridges, struggling to understand why she would say such things. She actually feels sorry for what she did? A sob caught in his throat, and he made a noise like he wanted to cough. He felt April's eyes on him, and thanked whatever higher power there was that she didn't hear that sob, sharply turning his head to catch her gaze. She broke the eye contact quickly, not wanting to spark any of his suspicion.
"I didn't read it, Raphael. You know I wouldn't."
Drawing his eye line slowly back to the small paper, he nodded, closing his eyes and folding the paper back up.
"I know…"
Silence fell between the two of them, the rain finally deciding to stop its' wild tantrum and calming to a light sprinkle, dusting the letter held tightly in Raphael's grip with a light mist. He stared blankly at it, his thoughts chattering away with a million emotions, and ideas, unable to decide what to do. She honestly thought she offended him? How? Why? How could she think something like that?
Wait. He knew how.
Gritting his teeth, Raphael felt a stab of guilt as he thought back, recalling how coldly he had turned her down, how unwanted he must have made her feel. God-damnit! Why the hell did he do that? He was an impulsive person. He knew it, he wasn't too stubborn to deny it. But the one thing he put any real thought into was one of the worst things he regretted. And he was going to live with that for the rest of his life.
"What are you going to do?"
He was jolted back to reality by the sound of April's whisper, glancing up at her when she pulled her knees in tighter to her chest, her eyes intense and unsure. She was afraid of his answer, what ever it was. He didn't even know. Gazing at his friend with an emotionless expression, he touched her cheek, brushing away wisps of her wild bangs, contemplating. He could go home, tell his brother off, and live with this…or he could go out and try to make it right. The choice seemed obvious, but how to go about it was the difficult part. It was always the difficult part.
"…You're gonna go after her?"
April's question wasn't really a question at all; she had read his expression. Raphael dropped the hand toying with her bangs and hunched his shoulders, rubbing his face roughly. His eyes were burning and gritty, he knew he was tired. Sleeping, however, wasn't part of his plan. If you could call it a plan. Looking down at the small letter between his big fingers, he laughed softly to himself, speaking quietly.
"Why'd you say 'her'? Don't you mean 'them'?"
Turning his head slightly, he watched her stare intently at him, pondering her words carefully, her mouth and nose hidden behind her knees. Raphael knew she didn't want to say anything to offend him, and frankly, he didn't feel he could be, right now. He trusted her enough to hear her opinion, and know it wasn't to insult him.
"I saw the way she looked at you. She…she wanted you. It was in her tone of voice, in her body language, in her eyes. And…I saw it in you, too."
Instantly, he scowled reflexively, masking the want he thought she saw, but dropped his head, knowing there was no point in hiding it. Frowning, he looked away, the fresh wound April had peeked at still seriously hurting. A gentle hand on his cheek brought his face back toward April, however, her fingers guiding him to look at her, her expression not one of judgment.
"Raph, you shouldn't be ashamed of your feelings, or how you show them. I'm really not the one to give advice…but I think that if you keep all those feeling bottled up…you'll lose yourself in them."
"But April, I don—"
A shake if her head and a finger to his lips stopped his interruption. He could only stare solemnly into her eyes as she cupped his cheeks, still holding to his gaze. He knew she must be tired, she looked it. No, not tired; exhausted. April smiled weakly.
"I'm your friend. I'm not here to argue. I'll support whatever you do. I just want you happy. And if that means going out after them – after her – is going to make you happy, I'll still support you."
Raphael sat silently, slowly absorbing what his friend had said, his rain-soaked face still held gingerly between her hands. Drawing a steady hand up to cover her cool fingers, he tried his best to smile, unable to display his gratitude. His eyes widen, however, as he watched her lean into him slowly, her warm lips meeting his in a soft kiss.
…What?
Frozen, he awkwardly puckered his lips and kisses back, feeling a hot breath come out through her nose, watching April lazily pull her face away, her eyes still closed as a distant smile played on her lips. Her eyes opening halfway, she shrugged her shoulders with a casual smile, turning back and wrapping her arms around her knees, gazing out at the lightly falling rain.
"What should I tell your brothers?"
Still looking at her with mild confusion, Raphael touched a finger to his lips, licking them to get a quick taste of her, not sure if he should have enjoyed that. Blinking, he glanced at the letter, and then at the vile, still sitting between them, considering her question.
"Tell 'em…I'm out for the night. If they're not satisfied, send 'em to the docks. I'm sure they'll figure out what to do."
Glancing at him with a nod, she rested her chin on her knees, watching him duck to avoid the umbrella as he stood up, walking back into the warm rain. Reaching down to her, Raphael handed her the letter, and the vile.
"Give the vile to the police. But…hold onto the letter, okay?"
April nodded again, safely tucking both back into her pocket. Initially, Raphael turned to leave, but again, his curiosity got the better of him, making him look back.
"April?"
"Yea?"
"Why'd you do that? I mean, I'm not mad, or anything. But…I really, uh—I dunno. I don't understand…"
Grinning, April shook her head, chuckling lightly despite her exhaustion.
"I don't know. I guess…it was curiosity. I wanted to know what she had to look forward to."
Raphael echoed her chuckle, feeling a blush warm his cheeks. Spinning on his heels, he waved to her over his shoulder, jogging across the rooftop to the ledge, disappearing into the night.