Somewhere, But How? - Disclaimer Harry Potter is not mine. Go figure.
When the sky began to glow faintly with false dawn, Lily stretched and yawned, blearily opening her eyes to look around at white walls she didn't recognize immediately. She rolled over to try and return to sleep moments before a shrill buzzing assaulted her ears, pulling her upright with a strangled cry. James rolled over and blinked up at her as she was frantically pawing the side table to try and find the alarm. Lily looked frantically around and located the alarm clock on the end table along the far wall. Angrily, she scrabbled her wand off her side-table and blasted the thing. It shut off, and reformed itself immediately afterwards. Lily blinked again, and as James shoved his glasses on, he looked between her and the clock, and chuckled faintly.
"Yeah, that's how Sirius turns it off too."
Lily glared at him, and walked over to the crib she'd pulled out for Rhiannon to check on the girl. Rhiannon was still sleeping quietly; she hadn't woken once in the night. Again, Lily wondered at this, but shrugged it off again with a yawn. The girl hadn't come about normally. It was no surprise she wasn't normal in much else, although Lily entertained the mild hope that she'd even out in good time.
Lily and James took a bit of time getting themselves awake and fed from what was in Sirius' apartment, and within the hour they had most of their stuff together except for a few things for Rhiannon, the little girl they were simply accepting beyond all reason. Lily was just gathering the few small cups of applesauce they had and placing them in the bags in Sirius' room, when she heard steps outside in the hall. Her first instinct was to ignore them, but when someone rattled at the door, she brought her head up sharply just as James darted into the bedroom with her and spelled the door shut. Lily stiffened, and mouthed 'what?' to him from her position opposite him.
James responded by stalking silently over to him, and whispering in her ear. "Ministry wizards. Probably checking to see if he might be here, maybe, or if he has anything in his possession that might be useful to take." There was still a struggle happening at the door, and James was at her side, dead still. His eyes were trained on the door to the bedroom, and he had his hand on his wand.
"Is there anything in here Sirius might not have taken with him that he wouldn't want them to have?" Lily whispered back, barely moving her lips, her breath stirring the hair over his ears.
James hesitated a moment. "He usually will leave his most precious items in his closet, in a small box. I think it has one of his wands in there as well."
"Fetch it. I'll grab Rhiannon and then we can go. But lock this door first, in case they get in." Lily hissed, before following her own advice. James set his own spell over hers, and then he eased his way over to the closet. Lily shoved the last few things into her bag, one with a magically expanded interior that looked like a regular muggle backpack. It had originally been a prank gift, but she found it very useful for a child, or as it was now, children.
Lily jumped when she heard the locking spells on Sirius' front door shatter, and then the loud clump of boots in the flat. James glanced around quickly, before muttering 'Accio Adidas shoebox' and a thump came from the back of the closet. He dove after it as Lily silently cast several more spells on the door to keep the ministry interlopers out before she dove to scoop Rhiannon, still blessedly asleep, out of her crib. Moments later, someone tried the doorknob shortly before that same someone crumpled to the ground quietly outside.
Lily rolled her eyes as James cursed from inside the closet, where he had his head stuck into the back wall from his hands and knees. He backed out quickly, smacking his head and cursing just as one of the ministry people cursed from out in the hallway. Lily stalked over to him and hissed.
"James, is that it? Can we just go now? As much as we're not fugitives, if this is the same government I last remember, we're in deep shit just by being who we are. Dead people! I somehow doubt they'll let us explain that 'oh, we're alive but we've no clue how' particularly with them presently searching Sirius' flat! That means your friend is rather under suspicion, don't you think?"
James scowled. "I noticed. I'm ready to apparate. You go on first, and then I'll follow. Remus' house, inside in the living room, kay?"
"And this because?"
"I'm hiding the trace, so they don't go investigating Remus' house immediately. It is possible to trace an apparation, Lils."
Lily rolled her eyes and stepped back. "You'd better follow damn fast. You're better at dealing with Remus than I am, dearest." Lily didn't wait for him to respond, but apparated away just as she heard one of the wizard's hex the door, making it shake in its frame.
Lily appeared in Remus' living room with a loud pop. She hadn't been concentrating, so it was rather messy, but she and Rhiannon were in one piece. Upstairs, she heard a faint curse, and then a hoarse voice called down the stairs.
"Who's there?"
Lily hesitated, and then softly called back up the stairs. "Remus? Is that you?" She was still uncomfortable with her own new existence. However, even without her identifying herself, the werewolf's hearing was keen enough to identify the speaker. She could hear the choke from where she was, and a tinkle of breaking glass. Cautiously, she set Rhiannon on the couch cushion she had insisted Remus and Sirius charm so as to not let the children - little Harry- fall off. From there, she moved to the stairs in time to throw up a shield as Remus came to the top of the stairs and threw a hex down at her.
"How dare you…" Remus growled, as he advanced slowly down the stairs, his wand trained on Lily the whole time. His eyes began to overflow with tears as he moved, stiffly from his injuries, but with a deadly grace all the same. Those yellow orbs held no pity for her, but hot rage. Silently, Lily cursed James' name to Hell and back as she backed off, her tongue tied in fear. Remus didn't have the same skill as Sirius or James, but she still didn't want to trade spells with him. She had never been quick at duelling.
Of course, James, with his excellent sense of timing, apparated into the living room just as Lily had her back pressed into the far wall and Remus reached the bottom of the stairs. Remus, showing surprising ferocity, immediately hurled a cutting curse at James, who didn't duck in time. The spell lashed across the side of his throat, spilling blood across the floor. Rhiannon began to cry, and Remus paused, looking at her with a frozen face. Slowly he turned to look at the child on the couch, before he turned again to James, growling low in his throat.
"Who are you, that you dare show up wearing the faces of my friends? If you thought I might be weaker, easier to fool this soon after the full moon, you are sadly mistaken. I won't be fooled again." James paled as Remus lifted his wand once more, ready to cast. James took only a moment before suddenly he changed, sliding from the form of a man, to his Animagus form of a stag. Remus shivered, sniffed the air once, and dropped his wand, following it to the floor in short order as his knees gave way.
Lily lowered her wand from its defensive position, as the tears that had previously been on Remus' face came faster. James and her reached Remus' side at the same time, as Lily slipped down beside him.
"Remus." She whispered. She placed her hand on his shoulder and watched his face as he kept mouthing that this was impossible, ludicrous, and just how could this all happen to him? James changed back, and hugged his friend, and Remus pressed his face into his shoulder, his whispers of denial never ending even as a smile bloomed across his face.
It was another five minutes before they got Remus to stand again, and they put off all explanations until he, and James, were fully cleaned up. This process took nearly a half hour; Remus had not been nice to himself with the compounding of his grief on his normal behaviour as a werewolf. Between them, they got Remus patched up, and Rhiannon changed and fed as she woke up partway through the process, diverting Lily's attention. Finally, they all were sitting at Remus' table, an alarm set on the door and the floo to warn them of anyone's approach to his home. They settled down with Remus holding Rhiannon comfortably on his lap as she giggled, drifting in and out of sleep.
"How?" Remus choked out. "Just… how? I'd say it was impossible, but it would be pointless. You look and smell like them, everything you do and say is how I remember it. Same voice, same look, and no one can copy an Animagus form. No one. I'd question Rhiannon, but she feels… right as well. Though I've no clue why."
Lily leaned on her hand. "And we have about as good a guess as you as to how and why we're alive. None of it makes sense. We can give you no explanation. We both awoke in Godric's Hollow, with Rhiannon in a crib in the baby room, and her name in our heads. Yours as well, apparently. We hadn't told you her name yet." Remus blinked, then nodded mildly.
James chuckled. "Thus, there is our big explanation. At present, our only solid plans are funeral ones for the rat." Remus glanced over at him; then nodded before he stiffened.
"You did not just say that." Lily looked at him blandly, and James raised his eyebrow. "You… Peter? You switched without telling me?" Lily glared over at James.
"Indeed, Remus. Peter was our secret-keeper." Lily drawled. "James and Sirius were convinced it was the perfect bluff, and that no one should be told, and they over-rode me when I said you should be told. Sirius had thought that you might be the traitor, as ludicrous as that is, and James didn't want to risk what they might do to you if you were the secret keeper and captured. He also had a mild suspicion of you that I never had. Although, I couldn't suspect any of you three. I just couldn't see it. You and Sirius were too dedicated, and you held your friends so dear to you, Remus, you'd never say a word against them, much less turn spy. Sirius had given up everything to be friends with James, so I couldn't suspect him. I should have known." Lily spat acidly. "I never suspected Peter only because he was so insignificant. He had no ties to anyone, so I couldn't see him having one to the dark lord. The fool I was for that, I'll never understand…" James nodded mildly.
"I never wanted to suspect you, Remus, but," James smirked bitterly. "As Lily said, I never suspected Peter because he was so insignificant. Sirius was a brother to me, so I couldn't think anything bad of him, and you… you were the only person I could see doing anything such as manoeuvring for power. You were so… smart, I could imagine you being crafty as I couldn't anyone else, and that just translated into giving a form to a phantom we had stalking us. Please forgive me, Remus. I shouldn't have thought that of you."
Remus sat, silent. His head was down, and he was plainly digesting the form of the suspicions his close friends had had. James sat for a moment, shifting awkwardly before he started to speak again, so as to break the silence.
"I shouldn't have thought that, Remus. Lily and me were very alike in our mistakes of underestimating Peter's lust for power. We should have seen it, should have taken better care, and should have told someone, anyone else! I can't believe we made such a mistake. Now we're all ripped apart, and Lily and I have to rebuild who we were, and explain something we don't even understand."
Remus cut off James' tirade with a faint quote. " 'Should have, would have, and could have, all add up to one thing: Didn't.' You couldn't have known, James, you didn't know. They're spies for a reason; you don't know who they are. You're not supposed to." Remus sighed. "I forgive you, James, Lily. In your position, I suppose you had to suspect someone. A werewolf seems a natural choice." Remus' voice was laced with disgust on his last words; a self-loathing that made Lily's neck prickle. She began to speak, but James beat her to it.
"Remus!" James roared. "Don't you dare say that, and you will never say that again!" Remus' head shot up from his hands as James began shouting. "I thought you might be the spy because you were clever, the most clever of any of the Marauders. Your lycanthropy had no factor in that, Remus, so if you dare try to say anything like that again, I will personally find someway to make you take it back. I swear it."
Remus blinked at James a moment, and glanced to meet Lily's equally angry eyes. Quietly, he looked between them and began to smile weakly. "I don't suppose I have much choice here, do I?" Lily and James both nodded firmly. Remus' smile widened. "Then I guess we have other things to move on to, then, as I think that subject has been covered and closed. Where do you want me to start?"
Lily said "The outside report of what happened that night!" just as James added his own say of "What happened to Sirius?" Lily glared at him.
"We will go from my point through to yours, thank you James." Remus smiled with amusement as James scowled, but backed down. Remus then began to speak.
"Clearly, Voldemort attacked your house –and this was two weeks ago, actually -, as he'd been told the location by your secret-keeper who was assumed to be Sirius, and the report says James fought him in the living room as Lily ran upstairs to Harry and to try and get out."
James felt a flash behind his eyes as he saw a scene play in front of his eyes.
Voldemort broke down the door as Lily ran up the stairs. James faced him with his wand already drawn, glaring into the human face with its pasty skin and burning red eyes.
"You think your mudblood wife can escape, Potter? Wormtail is an excellent servant; your emergency plans are moot now, thanks to your good friend."
A bitter taste flooded his mouth; he'd never felt so betrayed in his life. And very likely, it would one of his last feelings before death. Somehow, he found he'd have rather died in Lily's arms…
The scene changed briefly to an image of a blood soaked battlefield, where he saw himself holding Lily's head, her lower abdomen and unborn child a mess of blood and torn flesh just in front of a torn body he knew through no physical recognition was Sirius.
Bile filled his throat, choking him before his eyes could refocus on Remus' face as he told of the ministry saying that the spell Voldemort had used on Harry had backfired and killed him instead.
"The house was destroyed, but Dumbledore told me that he sent Hagrid to fetch Harry out of there to take him somewhere safe until a home could be found and made safe enough for him." Remus swallowed before he could continue. "The next morning, in muggle London, Pe-Pettigrew faced down Sirius, as it was reported to the press. Pettigrew accused him of –of betraying you to Voldemort, and killing them. The street exploded, killing twelve muggles, and all they found of Pettigrew was one of his fingers. I suppose Sirius may have lost control at the accusation, and put too much power into the spell." Remus placed his head in his hands. "I don't know how… but I suppose I never expected. I'd suspected Sirius for the traitor myself, ignoring the same things in Peter you both did, and I suppose those were the same things Sirius ignored as well." Remus moaned again, louder this time. "Merlin, James, Sirius is in Azkaban now. They gave him no trial; nobody listened to a word he said. I suppose everyone thought him unhinged; he was laughing when the Aurors arrived to take him in when Pettigrew confronted him. Laughing like a madman, as he always would when something in our pranks went horribly wrong. I –I can only blame grief for me overlooking everything we knew about each other. That is all I can blame."
James and Lily were both just staring at Remus. James' face was ashen. "Sirius… They threw him in Azkaban?" Lily was too stunned to point out how silly that sounded out loud, as she was having difficulty thinking past the ringing in her ears. The concept that slipped in, of Sirius being in that horrible prison of Azkaban, was not one that helped the ringing either. Slowly, the sound faded, but it took a few more minutes before she could think straight enough to understand that the conversation had moved on as James had kept talking.
"-James, you can't expect me to know how to do that. You'd never make it yourself, and I have no Animagus form. The only time I'd possibly be able to, I can't think straight. Does that sound useful to you?"
"Then we have to find someone who can! I'm not leaving him in there, and I really doubt we'd be believed as who we are in good enough time to get him out! And Merlin's drawers, where is my son?" James shouted. Remus flinched back a moment, before whispering that he didn't know. Before James could explode again, Lily placed her hand on his arm.
"James, I'm sure we can figure this out, but can we please just take a minute to calm down, so we can think? Please?" Lily kept her voice calm, and James collapsed onto his chair after she finished.
"I just want my best friend out of the hell I put him into." He murmured. Moments after, Lily smacked him up the back of his head.
"Him going to Azkaban was all Peter's fault. You will do no good arguing the partial faults of yours and his that brought that about, thank you very much. It is also the minister's fault, and Crouch's fault, and all the idiots that let him go without a trial, it's their fault too. But until we have regained our own level of intelligence, it would be advisable to stop blaming ourselves." James looked up at her in mild wonder, and Remus chuckled.
"She has you there. And I believe I have some good butterbeer in my fridge for your pleasure, if you so desire." When James and Lily both nodded eagerly, Remus fetched it and handed a bottle to each of them. Gently, they gave a small cheer and fell to drinking, and joking, and seeking even mild relaxation for at least the moment.
As they began to wind down from the butter beer, and they'd each emptied their bottles, Lily placed hers on the table and fixed both Remus and James with her eyes.
"Gentlemen, I do believe I know how to locate Harry. And it will be really very simple. James, may I have temporary possession of your hand?"
Bewildered, James extended his arm to her, looking askance at Remus as he did so. Remus was as clueless as he was, though, and he just shrugged and watched Lily with interest as she pulled a handkerchief out of her pocket and spread it on her lap. James idly let his hand rest on her lap, but when she sliced open the side of his thumb with a spell, he yelped and tried to pull back.
"Lily, what the Hell are you doing?"
Lily didn't release her grip on his arm. "Preparing the spell, fool. Hold still, I have to get your blood on this cloth." She wrapped the handkerchief over the cut, and James could see his blood rapidly staining a large spot on the white.
"Isn't that plenty, hon? It's hurts like hell."
"Almost." Lily seemed to be completely ignoring his discomfort. "There." Lily released his hand, idly casting a spell to heal the cut before she moved to cut into her own hand. She pressed the cloth to it until the fabric was soaked before she laid it on the coffee table with a murmured apology and healed her own cut.
James gave her a look with a raised eyebrow that needed no clarification. Remus' expression was quite similar.
"Now I just need to set up the incantation and we'll have our answer, boys. 'Ostendo mihi parvulus illae cruor. Ostendo sum suus locus.'" Her words were spoken among silence as they watched, and moments after, the blood shone golden before fading back into white. Lily leaned over, watching intently as the cloth faded into a light blue. There were a few spots of white, where the blood hadn't gone, but there was plenty of space with which to view.
The light blue gradually faded into a view of a small, black haired child's face, his eyes shut tight as he seemed to be sleeping. Lily touched the edge of the scarf and the image rippled as though it were a bowl of water. A whispered spell expanded the image, pulling away from the face of the boy - of Harry- to show more of a tiny room. James eyed it warily.
"That looks... It reminds me of a closet. That's not a bedroom. What's he doing in a closet?" James spat.
Lily hushed him as light spilled across Harry's form, and James hissed between clenched teeth as he found small bruises on his son's arms, and a gaunt belly with his ribs in stark relief. There was no noise, but the small face pinched into a tight expression usually associated with crying. He was dragged out of the small room into light, and a bony, horse-faced woman picked him up none-too-gently to walk up the stairs above the cupboard he'd been sleeping in. Remus stood to force James to remain seated as he watched this, and Lily pulled her teeth out of her lip to spit out 'ostendo sum suus locus' once more, and the scene shifted to show a neat, white house with a manicured lawn, and a shiny number four in prominence on the mailbox. Once Lily saw the image, she immediately clapped her hands together over the image, and spat 'Finite!', and the image faded away into the dark shade of dried blood.
"Well." Lily said; her teeth bared in a parody of a smile. "Harry is with my sister. Number 4, Privet Dr, Little Whinging, Surrey. When will you boys be able to join me in the Inquisition?"
Remus started. "Your sister? Why would she - doesn't she- She hates you! That's all you'll ever say about her, but how could she transfer that to a child?"
"Imagine Voldemort's attitude towards muggles flipped into a hatred of magic, Remus." James drawled, his face and voice too casual to be normal.
Remus took a moment to look at his two friends, and he quickly reassessed their reactions. He'd thought them to be angry, and affronted at the treatment he'd seen of their child, but his had been a deep underestimate. James and Lily were furious. As quickly as Remus noted this, he came to accept it. It was their child that had been injured. Looking at Rhiannon, seated now on her father's lap, he found that he understood their reaction. Shock had suppressed his own reaction, but now as he evaluated it, he found a simmering rage barely suppressed in himself, fuelled by the werewolf within him, raging at a woman who mistreated a precious cub.
"If you need to go get Harry, I'll take Rhiannon to the nearest store and buy a few more supplies for them. We'll probably need them." Remus stated. James and Lily nodded briskly and stood up, James handing Rhiannon to Remus. Remus held out his hand to stall their leaving. "Please … if you must do something illegal, take care not to get caught."
James grinned widely. "That's why I led the Marauders, Remus, and why I'm such an excellent auror. I know how to cover my tail. Thanks for the sentiment though. We should be back shortly."
Remus smiled lightly. "You know where everything is in my house James, and you're welcome to use any of it. Except for my potions supplies;" Remus clarified at the considering expressions they both got as he said that. "You're not to try making any poisons or explosives." Each exclusion cleared their faces. James looked flouted, and annoyed; Lily just looked disappointed.
"I'd always hoped to poison my sister though." Lily complained. "Maybe Sirius had some. Pity his apartment got routed. I suppose I could do my own work though."
James smiled and grinned at Remus. "We'll be back in one piece with Harry soon enough. We'll be seeing you. Take good care of Rhiannon." James waved, and Remus waved back before they both apparated away.