Thoughts and Dreams

Chapter 4

„Are you still tired?" she asked gently as she strode over to the bed again.

"Somewhat." he replied wearily. Rika sat down on the bed and looked at the man to her right. "How is it." she hesitated. "to sleep?"

"Weird." he replied casually, not moving his eyes away from the spot he had fixated a while ago.

"Let's sleep then." she suggested and lay down. Pulling the sheets over her body she rolled onto her side. Waiting for his movements to have calmed down she closed her eyes. It was weird to have somebody lying next to her. Not only did the bed feel smaller she felt a little threatened even. If it had been for one of her brothers, then she wouldn't have minded, after all she was close to them, but Gaara, she didn't even know him.

He was like an empty book with a few scribbles inside. If you would have to describe his character, it would have been easy: calm. Though she was sure, he was boiling on the inside to be an ordinary young man and live his life that way too, just as he sees it each day when observing others. But on the outside he was just calm and cold. Like a statue. Just that he didn't let one feel this gentle and warm feeling when around a statue. Like it was caught in the perfect moment.

Eventually both fell asleep, but only to be woken up by Gaara's tossing a few hours later.

Rika, waking up from the tossing, leant over the man's body. His face puckered up every now and then and his fists clenched into the bedsheets.

Carefully she poked his side and backed away a little. Upon seeing it was no use and that he was apparently suffering from some nightmare, she started to shake him. Shake him until he was awake.

Suddenly he sat up straight, nearly bumping into the woman that had woken him up. "I am sorry." she stammered. "You must have had a nightmare."

Gaara's cheeks hinted some blushing. His hands strode through his face and his hair as though he wanted to wipe some sweat away. "Are you ok?" she inquired and lowered her head to catch a glimpse of his face. He had his head lowered, staring at his hands blankly. "It's nothing. I am ok." he retorted monotonely and laid down again. 'Should I tell her about my dream?'

Rika's hand rested in midair, unsure wheter to pat his shoulder now and stroke him, just as you would for someone that just had a bad dream in order to spend some comfort. Yet she always forgot, that he was not an ordinary human. He had different needs and needed different treatment.

Her thoughts wandered off to the meeting they had today.

(Flashback Beginning)

They strode inside, walking close to each other, yet not touching each other. The door shut, the woman on the opposite waved Hohenheim to one chair, settled himself in another and turned a gaze of acute inquiry upon his visitor. "We are glad to be here today, Tsunade." Gaara spoke.

"The pleasure is on my side." she chuckeled. "But down to more important matters." a few more men strode inside. The rest of the Kage's of the Hidden Villages. Gathering in the small room around the round table, each of them took a seat.

"We have come here to discuss the momentary situations between the villages." Tsunade folded her hands in front of her. "I am proud of the developments between Konoha and Sunakagure recently."

A few smiled at the young married couple. "I guess some goes onto their account." pointed one out. If it wasn't for him wearing this hat and the mask everyone would have seen him smile. Everybody but Tsunade and Rika and Gaara wore those robes.

'They really believe we truly love each other.'

Tsunade was about the only one, apart from their friends, who knew that there was no love in this relationship, not even affection. It was all for these two hidden villages. Rika noticed Gaara's awkward look on his face he had for a moment, when just another person believed into their love. "Oh how wonderful young love is." they would say.

(Flashback End)

"Hey Gaara." she broke the silence. "Let's make a deal."

"Hm?" he grunted.

"For every dream or thought you tell me about, I will tell you more about me." Waiting for his reply, she shut her eyes again.

'Is it that what you call trust? Is it that what she's up to? Does she want me to trust her?'

"Alright." he agreed. "If you think it's a good idea."

Beaming to herself she felt as though she took another step closer- another step closer to the cold man she would most likely have to spend her life with if nothing changed. 'It's all about gaining trust, right?'

---

(Rika POV)

It was early in the morning that I woke up. I strode over to the closet as quiet as possible and changed into my every day clothes. I would head for Konoha today. I glanced over my shoulder at the man sleeping peacefully. There was something drawing me twards him when he was sleeping like that. There was no expression on his face again. No emotion I would see. No sadness, nothing, It was as though when he slept he felt good. As thoughthis was the time of the day when all his worries were sucked away. Are you dreaming? I wonder. Once again I was tempted to stroke his cheek gently before leaving, or run my hair through his probably silky hair. The time I had been with him, made me forget about the cold man and the monster he had been a little finally. Yet I still felt this hgue distance between us. And it was us, building the bridge of trust in order to reach the other shore.

The sun hadn't quiet risen yet, so the sand would still be cool and wandering to the Hidden Leaf wouldn't wear me out too much.

---

My feet finally touched grass, green grass. No sand anymore, nothing rubbing between my sole of the foot and the shoe. Though my family would keep telling me that our bloodline was made for the sand, I couldn't imagine to see Sunakagure as my home. Sand was sand. And it didn't quiet have as many variations as the Leaf had.

I headed right for the hospital, knowing that my brother had been hospitalized again. I figured mum must have left the hospital a while ago. She worked here part time since her medical skills were quiet different but effective. Though she had always dreamt of me being a medical ninja, it wasn't quiet my thing. Though considering my brother's sickness I had to put up with for long already, I did take it into consideration. The battlefield was were I felt best, fighting was what I wanted. That's where I could still prove my medical skills right? And that's where I believed them to be best. I didn't want to be tied to one place, to a hospital. Like I would never want to become a wife that had to stay in the kitchen and cook.

I was so lost in thought, I had forgotten that I had already reached Rei's room. Knocking, I entered. Private sphere was what we all valued the most. Though it was no use knocking at his door, for him being unable to hear me. He was unconcious. They had put him to sleep for a while for his wounds to heal better. We had thought it was ok, his body had gotten stronger and he was about to live a normal life again when he got injured, but his injuries wouldn't quite heal well.

"Rei." I whispered as I entered. I stroked his cheek gently and brushed a fear lose hairstrands out of his face. He had grown his hair long, just like our father. As I stood there, thinking back about everything that had happened since ever we came to Konoha, I felt sadness arising. And I let it go, right in front of the person I cared for. He wouldn't see or hear me crying, he wouldn't be there to comfort me, but around him, I felt as though I could let it go.

To my parents, I was the strong girl. To Gaara I was a wife and the one to show him that with hard work, you could change your path. But to my brothers, I was the fragile girl on the inside I had shut away most of the time.

"What am I to do?" I sobbed as I pressed my cheek onto the white bedsheets. "I want to help Gaara, I want him to be happy. But am I really capable of doing that? What if there's no cure? What if he had already slid into darkness and the love for himself for too long? Am I just wasting my time?"

I always had confidence, and I wasn't the type of person to give up easily. But Gaara was too hard to crack. I felt like giving up. Having shed thousands of tears for somebody who left me, without twitching even, I felt as though I didn't have to be the one to change something anymore. I had enough of being the person who tried to help others. I wanted to be selfish for once too. Yet I never realized I had always been. Believing that a person who cared for me and who I cared for, to be mine and to stay at my side. Ridiculous. Would Gaara tell me to leave too, if I started caring for him to the point I would refuse to go? Would he even want somebody caring about him? Or might he just feel as though I was pitying him?

As I had cried enough and left stains on my brother's bedsheets I got to my feet and walked outside. I didn't bother to wipe my tears away, I would let others see my sadness. Right now, I wished for somebody to hug me, but there was noone around. I was alone. Gaara, how could you put up with this lonliness, if I can't even put up with it for a few hours or a day?

Secretely I admired him and I was determined to tell him. I would let him know, that there was at least one person admiring him a little.

---

I touched the sand again, annoying as it was, it gave me a feeling of being back to a place I had longed for. The time I had been around the Kazekage, made me realize that even the easiest landscape had something beautiful, even though I couldn't get used to this simple brown sand.

"Rika-san!" I heard a girl yelling for me. Running towards me and wrapping her arms around my waist I saw a few kids following behind her.

"What's the matter?"

"The Kazekage-sama." she panted. "He's injured."

My eyes widened and I felt an odd feeling in my stomach. I never thought I would care. I felt as though someone precious to me had been hurt. Did I consider him a friend already, even if it was just the beginning?

I let them lead me to where the incident had happened. Soon my eyes fell upon a man dressed in black lying on the floor. Without doubt it was Gaara.

I knealt down besides him, intentionally touching his cheek. "Gaara?" I inquired, waiting for his reply. "Are you ok?"

My hand pressed onto a wound on his stomach. I saw his face puckering up in pain. Concern filled my eyes.

"Don't move!" I yelled at him. Suddenly I felt walls of sand arising to my left and right. Somebody had thrown kunai's at me. In shock I spun around. Blood-covered hands reached for my kunai's but there were none. Whoever had attacked me, he had stolen mine. Bursting a rock close to me I threw the shattered pieces at a spot where I suspected the enemy. But reinforcements were already there taking care of the situation.

My heart racing like mad, I turned around to the wounded man again. "Gaara." I swallowed. "You protected me." I forced the tears forming in my eyes back. I wouldn't cry over him. I wouldn't show him I am touched by his actions. I wouldn't make it this easy for him.

"A Kazekage has to protect his village." he pressed through his lips in pain. "And a husband has to protect his wife."

I smiled softly at him. "You truly are one of a kind."

(Rika POV End)

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Liked the chapter? I do hope so, it took me quiet a while to write it. I know it has been a little much about Rika, but it's essential for the future storyline I believe. Once again, I'll be happy to see reviews, so don't only read, REVIEW too:)

Since I've got quiet some ideas at the moment, expect an update soon, unless something keeps me off from writing.