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"Bloody hell," Rick murmured as they exited the cinema "Great choice of film, Vyv!"

Vyvyan followed, arms full of food stolen from the already destroyed snack bar "I didn't know it was going to be so boring! I thought it might have kicked up a bit after the bunnies came to tea-"

"Yeah! At the end of the film!" Rick interrupted.

Neil, who was in front of the two bickering young adults (if they can be called that) turned around "What are you talking about, guys? The little bunnies never came home for tea. It wasn't even in the film!"

Vyvyan shuffled the weight in his arms "Well, you see, Neil, you may not have noticed but I kicked down the wall on the right side so I could watch a different film instead. It's actually quite ingenious, two films for the price of one!"

"But… We didn't pay."

Vyvyan looked puzzled for a second but shook his head "Anyways, it was a film about a group of bunnies having to go out into the wide world and give eggs to everyone. Even with Rick watching it, I was too bored to even try to smack him one…"

"So you're not talking about Mr. Fuzzy Bunny and The Amazing Fiddle-Finding Adventure?"

"No."

"But did you see it when Mr. Fuzzy Bunny started being eaten-alive by rabbits who then went into kung fu fighting with cyberfoxes from the planet Uranus and then they had to blow up the death star and-" Neil fell to the floor as Rick punched him in the face.

"Yes, yes! We saw that bit! God, must you repeat every single thing all the time? You stupid nagging hippie!" Rick yelled, changing his usual insult 'Stupid bloody hippie'

Neil stood and brushed dirt from his shirt "Oh, so I'm a stupid nagging hippie, now, am I?"

"Yeah!" Rick stuck his fingers up in his face "You're just like my mother!"

"What, the one who died?" Vyvyan mocked and started laughing as Rick began to have a tantrum and jumping up and down.

"DON'T SAY THAT! DON'T SAY THAT! YOU BASTARDS! YOU BASTARDS! I HATE YOU, YOU BASTARDS! STUPID BASTARDS LIKE YOU SHOULD BE LOCKED AWAY INA PLACE FOR….uh…. for BASTARDS!" Rick screeched.

"Hmm, I think he's calling us bastards, Vyv." Neil noticed rather late. Vyvyan sighed in reply.

Rick slowed down and was in tears "Mummy! Mummy! Bloody rummy! I miss you so bad. Forever in my heart, you stupid old bag." He sniffed and ran a hand through his, making it rather more messy than it usually looked.

"Is everybody calm now?" Mike asked.

"Yes, Michael." Vyvyan and Rick replied glumly.

"Uh… Oh! Yeah, Mike." Neil added after being a bit slow and receiving looks.

"Right then. Look, it's Vyv's birthday-"

"Yes, so you keep saying!" Rick shouted with a sudden outburst.

"Hey! Don't interrupt me." Mike warned.

"Yeah, don't interrupt Mike, wimp." Vyvyan added.

"No jib from you either!" Mike continued "So, it's Vyv's birthday, he can what he wants. Even if it involves us, pain, violence, stupidity-"

"Money?" Vyvyan asked innocently.

Mike looked at him as if he had sprouted an extra leg "What you going on about? It may be your birthday but I'm not cashing out. Money is meant to be used on more important and worthwhile things."

Vyvyan nodded understandingly, not seemingly insulted.

"Anyway, Where to now?" Mike asked.

Vyvyan handed his armful of food to Neil, who later toppled over "Well, Michael, I'd like to kick Rick's head in and then rip out his innards and-"

"Enough!" Mike shouted. He then looked down the street for a brief second "The petshop's the closest. I don't know why you want to go there but, since it's only around the corner, let's go."

"I suppose you lot are going to ignore me as usual. Seeing how you don't think I'm very important and I don't deserve a birthday-"

"SHUT UP NEIL!" Rick shouted in his face.

"Oh yeah, shout at me!" Neil yelled back, half-heartedly "Just because I'm a hippie-" he continued.

"Neil, it's because you are you, end of story!" Mike silenced everyone.

Vyvyan sighed "I didn't even get into that argument…"

"Look, we are all cold and freezing let's just get down to the petshop so we can get this day over with!" Rick suggested while yelling at the same time.

Nobody replied. They just nodded and started walking down towards the small looking petshop.

When they entered, they were surprised at how big it really was. Birds were in large cages alongside the entrance and more towards the back. Fishtanks were built in such a way that they sat atop each other quite like aisles in a supermarket and stretched to the other end of the shop. On the right side, behind the birdcages, was a large transparent plastic pane that covered a large portion of the shop. In there were cages that held dogs, cats, rabbits, guinea pigs, hamsters, gerbils and mice. A few birds were free of their cages and flew around independently, not making a break for the door as the four students walked in. A parrot landed on a swinging perch beside Vyvyan's head and squawked loudly.

"Polly want crack!" It cried.

Vyvyan frowned "Crack? Don't you mean cracker?"

It squawked again "No, I mean crack!"

Vyvyan shook his head "Try Ajax, it's a lot better."

"Really? Sure I will. Thanks for the info spotty boy."

"Hey! I'm not spotty! It's Rick, you can see mount fugi from here!"

The parrot laughed and the two continued talking casually.

"You have any pets?" it asked.

"I did, a hamster called S.P.G but he died not too long ago." Vyvyan replied a little solemnly.

"Aw, I'm sorry for your loss."

"Hey! Look, Mike! Vyvyan's found someone of his own intelligence to talk with!" rick bellowed proud he had thought up something witty. Mike didn't turn around "Uh… Mike?" Rick tapped him on the shoulder. He still didn't turn "Did you hear what I said? The smart witty comment about Vyvyan and that parrot? Hello? Hello?" he growled loudly "Oh lordy lordy! It's like trying to communicate with… Something really difficult to communicate with…" Rick shook his head "MIKE!"

"What?" Mike turned around.

Rick jumped from Mike's loudness "Uh… Did you hear what I said about Vyv and the parrot?"

"No, he's not getting a parrot."

"No! I mean did you hear the witty smart comment I made about it?"

"I told you, no more lip. If you're going to comment on something at least make it suttle and not tell me!"

Rick rubbed his temples "Okay, look, just forget it. I hate getting into these conversations with you, Mike, there is just no winning."

"Finally you realize something that's been so blaringly obvious."

Neil was over looking at the tortoises and handling one, talking to it. Probably boring it to death "You're like me, I guess. Slow, but always hard-working. People ignore you because you seem so small when really you are one of the smartest things ever met. And there aren't many like us, is there? Only a few million worldwide-"

"Get up Neil! Stop trying to kill that tortoise!" Rick shouted.

"I'm not killing it…" He looked back at it. Yep, it was dead "Oh," he put it back and scratched his head "It was moving before." He shrugged and started talking to another unfortunate victim.

Mike wondered into the plastic paned room and looked at the animals inside. Suddenly, a large male Doberman trotted around the corner from a small storage cuboard. Mike walked up to it and started stroking it "You're a gorgeous fella, aren't you? Too bad you aren't as good-looking as me. I bet all the lady dogs are after you. Oh wait," Mike corrected himself "They're after me. Sorry mate, I don't think there's a girl left for you. I think you'd better go cat-wise."

So, while Vyvyan was with a parrot, Neil with tortoises, Mike with a dog, where was Rick to go? He looked to the cats but they hissed at him and tried clawing at him. He turned to the dogs; they barked and growled, to the birds, they dropped on the bottom of their cages, playing-dead. Then, he turned to the rodents.

Rabbits weren't for him. Neither were mice, gerbils or hamsters. Ferrets squirmed away from him and then he saw the Guinea Pigs. Most ran away but one, a beautifully toffee, chocolate and coconut coloured female Guinea Pig stayed and looked up into his eyes. Rick bent down and picked her up. She was so soft and her fur was so fine.

"Hey, guys," Rick called. Vyvyan came forward, one of his stars on his forehead missing where a little hole was now with blood trickling down his face, his nose ring was missing, his clothes had been torn badly, one sleeve hanging by a thread and claw marks all over his left arm. Neil approached next, his right index finger red and throbbing and dark tortoise poo stains down his shirt. Mike came next, clothes ripped in shreds, hair completely messed up though not as bad as Rick's and deep teeth marks in his arm. Clearing his throat, dismissing the state of his fellow students and cradled the guinea pig in his arms "I think I've found someone. The one for me." The guinea pig's blue and black eyes blinked and she rose on her back legs, wiping her faces with her paws.

Vyvyan, Mike and Neil looked at each other and counted simultaneously though Vyvyan was in the double-digits "3……….2………….1……."

"Huh?" Rick inquired but his curiosity fled when he felt the warm trickle of guinea pig pee trickle up his shirtsleeves, down his chest and all over his hands. There was a lot of it too "EGUH!" he yelled. He, despite being covered in pee, put the guinea pig back down in her cage along with her friends gently. She seemed to smirk as she trotted off in a funny way into a little hut where the rest of the rodents resided.

Rick pulled at his shirt "That's disgusting!"

"Yeah but funny!" Vyvyan laughed but then wincing and clutching his forehead.

"Come on," Mike said with some difficulty "I said we'd have Vyvyan's birthday, despite pain. Let's stay true to our word."

Vyvyan sighed "It's been great so far! The pain has been a brilliant added bonus!"

Neil moaned "Look, guys, I'm covered in tortoise feces and I'd rather not be so can we just, like, y'know, go home to clean up?"

Rick's eyes widened and he pointed to him self, his peed-covered self "Oh my heart bleeds!"

"That's a good idea, Neil. Wow, twice in one lifetime." Mike said as he made his way to the door in an awkward manner.

"What do you mean twice in one lifetime?" Neil questioned.

The four students limped, lumbered and shuffled onto the street and started to walk painfully up hill.

"Remember that time you said we should watch TV?" Rick asked Neil, answering for Mike.

"Yeah."

"Well it was a really good idea!" Rick said being honest. The unbelievable had happened and it was so unbearable Neil was actually quiet for the rest of the way, thinking over what was said and how it was possible to receive a compliment from Rick.

Sorry again for lateness. --" it's so annoying, I'm sorry. The guinea pig in this was called Toffee. Her full-name is Toffe Choclate Coconut cake because of her colours and it was all in one. I decided there should be some fun-loving way to remember her. She passed away while I was on holiday and I found out a month and a bit ago. I'm still very sad but she wouldn't want that so I try and remain hyper and happy.