Chapter 21 - Of the Past: The Journey

"The day my bodyguard crashed through the roof of my church was the day it began," said Aerith quietly.

Redman snorted. "Him to?"

Aerith smiled bitterly. "Yeah, I met both of them that way. He had gotten knocked off of a reactor walkway or something when he was trying to blow it up."

Redman hesitated. "How... likely is it that he's going to become a terrorist again? Blowing a reactor..."

Aerith waved a hand. "All of the groundwork for it is gone. The original AVALANCHE never occurred. Sephiroth is not going to go insane. Hojo won't get his filthy hands on my bodyguard a second time."

Redman closed her eyes, a frustrated exhale escaping her nose. "Why is it always Hojo?"

A sharp laugh escaped Aerith. "I don't know, I... I really don't..."

She shook her head, trying to stop the urge to cry at that. "Honestly, he's more likely going to end up working for Shinra than not. His dream was to be a SOLDIER, like Sephiroth, but didn't make the cut."

She gave a derisive snort. "Because Shinra is a bunch of idiots with rigid guidelines for what they want. I don't know what in particular made them fail him out of the cadet program, but, it was foolish. There was always more to him that met the eye. Even if the one I knew wasn't the real him."

"What... does that mean?" asked Redman.

"Hojo," spat Aerith, "Screwed up his head so badly and experimented on him. That insane freak was trying to replace Sephiroth, not even days after he died for the first time, Hojo started trying to replace him."

The look of disgust on Redman's face only helped her anger cool a little. "Jenova is... an insidious monster, I don't think I've said it enough. It manipulates and controls people its in, either directly, or subtly. Memory manipulation is one of its powers. My Bodyguard... didn't know who he was for the entire time I knew him. He..."

Her anger evaporated into grief. "He thought he was someone else. He... absorbed some of Zack's memories... and thought he was a EX-SOLDIER 1st Class."

"There is no such thing as an EX-SOLDIER, at least, not for long," said Redman wearily before she gave Aerith a look of sadness. "You saw much of Zack in him then, didn't you?"

Aerith nodded, swallowing heavily. "The first time I saw him spin his sword overhead, that same ridiculous victory pose Zack used to show off with, I thought my heart stopped. He was more quiet and introverted than Zack was, sometimes cold," she giggled a little, "Not to mention he could be simple and awkward, those were part of his original personality in that memory mix. But... there were so many little things that just screamed Zack to me about him."

She shook her head. "Then there were the Planet's whispers, and my own observations. It... didn't take me that long to realize he hid behind a mask he didn't even know about. I told him once I wanted to meet the real him. That's the closest I ever got to telling him the truth about himself. I felt guilty about it, never telling him, I imagine that Ti... that uh... Fists, felt guilty to."

"Fists?" asked Redman.

"Either Fists or a really rude name," said Aerith, holding back a giggle, "And I like her to much to be mean."

Redman raised an eyebrow.

Aerith just shook her head. "She had a, 'feature', that I might have been a bit jealous of."

Redman blinked once and then started laughing, Aerith let her giggles out at that. It wasn't hard to guess.

Aerith sighed. "Well, when he crashed through the roof, one of the Turks showed up a few minutes later, but... they didn't have that same atmosphere they usually do when they approached me. I didn't know if they were there for me or him. I was... scared they were going to take me back, so, I convinced my bodyguard to be my bodyguard."

She smiled a little sheepishly. "Offered him a date as payment."

"A date."

"What can I say? I was channeling my inner Zack," answered Aerith, blushing a little.

Redman laughed. "Bad influence, that one."

"Well, at least I wasn't flirting with everything that moves," mused Aerith before shaking her head, "We got away from the Turk, and my bodyguard laid low for like... less than twenty-four hours before trying to ditch me. Honestly, I had supernatural senses, I could feel it when he left his room and walked downstairs. I just let him get away with it because I was honestly impressed he avoided the squeaky floorboard. Course, then I showed up in front of him later because I knew the slums way better than he did."

"How'd he react to that?"

"Regular macho man, 'I'm a big tough guy, I can handle this you shouldn't get involved', yada yada nonesense," said Aerith, waving her hand, "I ran on ahead of him and he had to catch up."

Redman snorted in amusement.

Aerith frowned. "I was trying to help him find his way back to AVALANCHE's hideout in another sector, but... we caught sight of Ti... of Miss Fists on the back of one of Don Corneo's pleasure coaches."

Redman wrinkled her nose. "Why?"

"That's what we were trying to figure out, so i came up with the idea of sneaking us in," said Aerith in cheer, "I got him to crossdress and introduced us as potential 'workers'."

Redman just shook her head. "I don't know if I should be impressed, amused, or horrified."

"All three?" Aerith suggested, "Impressed by our bravery, amused that I got him to crossdress, and horrified that out of the three of us, Don Corneo chose my Bodyguard as his nightly 'lady'."

Redman started choking with laughter.

"I know right?" giggled out Aerith, "He was so awkward, but anyway, Fists had revealed she needed to squeeze Don Corneo for information. So we did."

She grinned slyly, "I've never threatened to rip a guys dick off before."

She wrinkled her nose. "Though on second thought, I don't think I would have wanted to see his, let alone touch them. Yuck."

"I don't normally advocate for murder, but, please tell me one of you killed him," pleaded Redman.

Aerith shook her head. "He bit it eventually, but not then."

She looked away for a long moment. "He revealed that Shinra was going to blow up the support pillar and drop the plate down on the Sector Seven slums."

Redman paled. "What?"

Aerith nodded then scowled. "He had a trap door that he triggered to drop us into the sewer systems. Had to waste time fighting a giant sewer monster, no I'm not kidding, its probably still down there. Then we had to get through the sewers, through the train graveyard, and to the Sector 7 pillar."

She trailed off for a moment and grew quiet. "The pillar is where Jessie died. She gave her life trying to stop a massacre."

Redman's face shuttered closed. "Shinra killed my daughter in what you saw."

"Yes," there was no easy way to say it.

Redman closed her eyes. "If you don't mind. I think I need to end the session for today and hit the nearest bar."

Aerith really didn't get a chance to say yes or no (she would have said okay anyway), before Redman had her coat on and was out the door...

"So... how are you doing today Miss Redman?"

The therapist snorts. "Pretty sure that's my line miss Gainsborough."

Aerith smiled a little. "Stealing it for today."

Redman huffed a little before sighing. "Well, a week long vacation to get my mind in order was what the doctor ordered. I'm sure you enjoyed being spared my prodding."

"Your words, not mine," said Aerith with mock innocence.

"So, I believe we were at Shinra being a colossal disaster of a company and dropping the Sector 7 pillar?"

Aerith sighed. "Yeah, we were."

She looked away, uncomfortable. "I... one of Avalanche asked me to get their child out of Sector 7 while they tried to stop the pillar's destruction. I did, but, apparently my involvement with Avalanche had nixed the Turks silence on me. I was confronted, and either I turned myself in, or something happened to the child. So... I gave myself up."

She was silent for a very long moment. "And they took me back to the labs."

Redman took in a slow and deep breath. "How... bad was it?"

Aerith's lips peeled back in a sneer. "Hojo wanted to breed me with another species."

The disgust on the woman's face was palpable.

"Fortunately, my four legged friend was intelligent, and said he wasn't particularly interested in two legged things," said Aerith with tense amusement.

Redman gave her a blank look.

"Humans aren't the only intelligent sentient lifeforms on the planet," was all Aerith said before her face darkened, "But we were two completely different species, we weren't compatible in the slightest. Hojo was doing it as a punishment, a sadistic treat for him and a violating humiliation for me."

Her fists tightened enough to draw blood, her voice trembling with loathing, "I hate him. I hate him so much it feels like I'm burning inside."

"We can stop for today if..."

"No," said Aerith sharply, "No. It's... its fine. Because Red, that's the nickname we gave him, played his part, chasing me around slowly, and when my Bodyguard freed us, Red tore into Hojo. If we hadn't had to fight one of Hojo's violent experiments, Red would have killed him. As it was, I hadn't ever felt so satisfied watching Hojo get mauled around like that as I did then."

Redman nodded slowly before frowning. "This... Red, is he... I know they've been clearing out Hojo's messes from the science department..."

"No, Red would have been captured a few years from now," Aerith said softly, "He's not here, and I have no idea how being spared Hojo's madness will change him from who I remember."

It made her ache, to realize the Nanaki she had known would certainly not be like the one she may one day meet.

Aerith sighed and rubbed her eyes, her shoulder's dropping. "No one is going to be like I remember. Even Vincent isn't quite the same."

"I'm sorry."

Aerith shook her head. "No, its... its fine, because hopefully, they'll be better, less pained and damaged from life. Even if they aren't like before..."

She licked her lips. "Where did I leave off? Hojo getting mauled, right. Well, he got away while we were fighting the experiment, then we tried to get away, got caught, and imprisoned for the night. After that is when things started to steadily get worse."

She swallowed. "The following morning, our doors were open, and the hallways were slick with blood, so many people were dead. I had been desensitized and re-sensitized to death, had lived through the labs, but, Hojo was methodical, orderly in his butchery, this was the first true massacre I had ever seen. It was Sephiroth, he had come and killed the President."

"I've been given a basic rundown," murmured Redman, "This was the... insane Sephiroth?"

Aerith nodded. "Yes."

"Why didn't he just kill you all while you were in the cells?"

"We had a purpose to play in his schemes," said Aerith, "Like I said about my Bodyguard, he was an attempt to clone Sephiroth, who decided he'd use that to his advantage and try to influence him."

"Did he?"

Aerith looked away again for another long moment, feeling phantom pains of Cloud pummeling her into the ground while under Sephiroth's control after giving him the Black Materia, laying bloody and battered wondering if being murdered by someone she loved was how she would die. Her voice was dry and quiet when she answered, "Eventually."

She slowly stood up and turned for the door without a word and left.

"We had a crazy flight from Midgar after we bailed out of Shinra tower," said Aerith, shaking her head, "It was madness. You know the display vehicles in the lobby level?"

"Yeah?"

"My bodyguard took the motorcycle, we took the truck, and we drove right out of the window onto the freeway."

Redman made a choking sound of laughter. "They're fueled?!"

"Apparently," said Aerith, giggling a little, "It was a crazy motorcycle chase with Shinra trying to drive us down and ram us off the freeway, but we got away, and out of Midgar, into the world."

She fidgeted a little. "It was my first time outside of Midgar since I was a baby. The immediate wastes weren't anything special, but once we got out into the grassy plains, it was breathtaking to be among nature, to be able to hear the planet more clearly."

She smiled sadly. "Not that I had fully learned how to understand it yet at the time."

Redman nodded. "It's certainly a change of pace from the dreary metal city."

Aerith hummed in agreement, her thoughts drifting. "We... ventured across the world..."

"That's rather vague."

Aerith shrugged, bowing her head and mumbling a little. "Its... how can I describe what it was like properly? To travel with strangers who would become my treasured friends? The first I really had aside from Zack. We fought and bled together, covered eachothers backs, took turns on guard duty while others slept..."

"They looked so peacefully sleeping," she murmured, old memories grayed by age drifting across her vision, "As if the crusade we waged and the weight on our shoulders weren't so world ending important."

"Who were you particularly close with?"

"Miss Fists and Red," she said automatically, "I liked my Bodyguard, grew to love him, but... I never knew the real him. I never let it go farther than affection, the date at the Gold Saucer was as far as it went."

"What is the Gold Saucer?"

Aerith blinked. "Oh right, Shinra hasn't burnt down Old Corel has it?"

Redman closed her eyes and exhaled through her nose. "No, the mining town, last I knew of it, is fine."

"Hmm, well, with Avalanche never going to happen, Corel won't get caught in the cross-fire and destroyed, so Shinra wont cover it up by building an amusement park over it," mused Aerith, ignoring the disgusted look on Redman's face, "Which means the likely hood of Ba... of Gun-Arm ever getting one, losing his wife, and taking action slim to none."

She sighed. "Aside from his sailor-mouth, I liked him, he was funny. Acted so tough, but melted to his little girl, had a heart of gold."

"I hope he didn't use that mouth near his daughter," said Redman teasingly.

Aerith smiled sadly. "I don't think I actually ever saw them interact, mostly I heard it second hand. Miss Fists had all kinds of stories to tell."

Her eyes went distant. "Didn't live long enough to see them reunited in person."

Redman winced a little. "Ah."

Aerith took a few minutes in the following silence to considering what she should or should not talk about in the journey...

"Did you ever speak to Sephiroth? When he was insane?" asked Redman.

Aerith blinked, caught a little offguard. "No. I was always an afterthought to him until I became a threat. Then he killed me. I never actually talked to him."

She frowned a little. "I'm not sure there's anything I could have said anyway. The only time our interacting might have mattered if it had been before the Nibelheim incident."

"The Nibelheim incident?"

"It's where he went insane," answered Aerith, sighing after, "Where everything went wrong. I wont make excuses for him, but... Angeal was dead, Genesis was losing his mind, Jenova was there to pry at and mentally attack him, the lies Hojo left in the basement for him to read, his entire life up to that point. Zack tried, but he wasn't enough to keep him stable, he couldn't fill the holes."

"I had Elmyra," said Aerith quietly, "He had no one left to reach him who could when it mattered the most."

She shook her head. "Nibelheim is where we met Vincent Valentine in his self-imposed exile in a coffin for the last few decades."

"You don't seem to have an issue naming him."

Aerith gave her a bemused look. "One, Vincent is already here, two, he can look after himself."

"He's the moody Turk in the red cloak, correct?"

Aerith snorted. "Nice description."

"If it fits, use it."

"Yeah, that's him."

Redman hummed. "What do you think the chances are of him agreeing to these kind of sessions?"

"Slim to none," said Aerith flatly, "You have nothing to coerce him into them like you do me."

Redman scowled. "I know it was a rocky start, but, these are supposed to help."

Aerith crossed her arms and gave her a grumpy look, sidestepping her point and moving on. "We went through the mountains to Rocket Town after that."

"Rocket Town?"

Aerith blinked. "Uh... its north of Nibelheim?"

"There's no town by that name there," said Redman, "Just the launch pad for the upcoming space program."

"Oh," said Aerith, surprised, "So the Rocket hasn't failed yet."

"It fails?" said Redman, frowning.

"Yeah, something was wrong with the rocket, they had to abort the launch, and rather than fix it, Shinra abandoned the project," confirmed Aerith, "They settled a town around the failed launch pad after."

Redman shook her head. "Damn, Highwind's going to be devastated."

Aerith's eyebrows climbed. "You know Cid?"

Redman's climbed to match hers. "As a matter of fact, I do. I am invited to many of Shinra's little parties, as is Mr. Highwind. He's a dreamer that one. You should see him smile when he talks about going up into space, he lights up as if its the love of his life."

Redman squinted at her. "How do you know him? You sounded rather familiar with him."

Aerith scratched the back of her head. "Ah well..."

Ah screw it, Cid could always take care of himself. "He was the last person to join our group."

Redman's jaw dropped. "Cid Highwind became a terrorist?"

Aerith's jaw set. "Honestly, most of us except for my Bodyguard, Miss Fists, and Gunarm, never did anything you'd consider terrorism. We fought against Shinra, sure, but Shinra kind of asked for it the entire time and was a completely corrupt and tyrannical government. There wasn't a single person in our group that Shinra hadn't screwed over majorly in one way or another."

She crossed her arms and give Redman a foul look. "I sure as hell never blew up any reactor."

"Well, that's information I did not have," said Redman defensively, "You didn't exactly give me a job description."

Aerith rolled her eyes. "While I was alive, we were mostly running from Shinra and chasing after Sephiroth."

Redman shook her head. "You, your Bodyguard, 'Miss Fists', a man with a gunarm, 'Red', Vincent Valantine, and Cid Highwind, a brave group to be 'chasing' after Sephiroth."

Aerith grinned. "You're missing the Toy Cat and the Kleptomaniac."

Redman gave her an owlish look.

"What?" said Aerith, grin not leaving her face, "I said Cid was the last to join, not that there hadn't been others."

Redman huffed, smiling a little. "I'm not sure I want to know about the other two."

"The Cat was... complex," said Aerith slowly, "And in the interest of not giving who he really was away I'm going to leave it at that. Don't give me that look, there's no way you wouldn't go pester him, I'm having a hard time keeping my distance away as it is."

Redman put her hands up in mock surrender. "And the other?"

"The klepto was fun to be around," said Aerith, wistful for that childish and spunky banter she used to have with Yuffie, "Except that time she stole all of our materia. We had to chase her down and... well... it was just a mess. Honestly... I mean, we understood why, its why we let her stay with us after, we just wished she had asked instead. We would have just given her some, or offered more after Shinra and Sephiroth had been dealt with."

"That is a very forgiving outlook," said Redman, head tilting in thought.

"We weren't Shinra," Aerith answered pointedly.

Redman crossed her arms and gave her an unamused look. "My job is to help people, Aerith."

"To you maybe, to Shinra you are just a replaceable tool to keep their other tools working correctly," Aerith rebutted flatly.

"I don't particularly care what management thinks of me," said Redman, voice rising a bit, "As much as you seem to think otherwise, I am not here for the paycheck anymore than I am here for company rank or notoriety. I am here because I want to be here, because I want to help people, because I think I can make a difference."

Something ugly and nasty bubbled up, and somewhere inside Aerith knew she shouldn't have said what she said, that it was cruel and wrong; she was just so sick of these sessions, of having to dig into things she wanted to forget or prevent. "Yeah? Well you sure as hell didn't make a difference last time aside from probably dying to some SOLDIER who snapped and pushing Jessie to join AVALANCHE."

The Therapist's face closed off, eyes cold, lips went tight, hands clenched hard enough to leave marks. "..."

Aerith had a brief moment of cruel delight that felt icy and sickly but satisfying before she shoved it down, her throat bobbing as she swallowed thickly; had she really just said that? "Alberta, I didn't..."

"I think we're done here for today," said Redman in a sharp tone, "Get. Out."

Aerith bowed her head, mumbled out, "Sorry," and left.

Aerith hesitantly set down a bundle of some of her most beautiful grown flowers on Redman's desk; the therapist in question raised an eyebrow. "Whats this?"

"An apology?" said Aerith sheepishly.

Redman hummed, taking the flowers to briefly look over and smell before setting them on the side of the desk. "Sit."

Aerith did. The wooden chair by the desk wasn't nearly as comfortable as the red one she could sink into.

Redman began in a neutral tone. "I took another look over your personality profile again, from before your 'visions'. You were always noted as being extraordinarily kind and patient. In fact, there was little of anything that could be defines as negative in your entire profile."

Aerith said nothing.

"It's rare for that to actually be true," said Redman, "In my experience, normal people express both positivity and negativity in their daily lives. Those who only show one side often are hiding the other. Even if everything is going good in someone's life, its in human nature to want and crave more, to bemoan what they have even if its far more than others, and so much more. You might be half-cetra, but you are also half-human."

She gave Aerith a patient look. "You've had an extraordinary amount of negativity and pain in your life, and in what you saw in your visions. From what I've read about you, and what I've observed over our time together, is that you've never had a proper outlet to it. Teenagers already have issues with emotional control without the history you've suffered through. It builds inside, from one stressful situation to another, day by day, until it bursts. Sometimes in violence, sometimes in corrosive nasty comments."

"I'm sorry about what I said," said Aerith quietly.

"I know you are," said Redman, "But my point still stands. I believe an outlet could do you wonders. Tell me, you're turning fifteen soon, correct?"

"Uh, yeah, next week actually," answered Aerith, "Why?"

"Its quite simple really," said Redman, "Next week, the day you turn fifteen, I'm recommending you be sent out on your first mission. Nothing fancy, just the usual starting missions, its generally clear monsters out of the slums, or go deal with a pack of Kalm Fangs or two."

Aerith blinked at her.

Redman smiled a little. "One good thing about monsters is no one is going to complain if you use them to vent on."

Aerith frowned. "You... want me to kill monsters?"

"Giving yourself release would be the proper term for what I am referring to," amended Redman, "Imagine they are Hojo, imagine they are anyone you want to beat into a bloody pulp and do so. It's something SOLDIERs generally do when they are angry, to take easy missions to vent their emotions on."

Aerith swallowed thickly. "You want me to kill, and enjoy it."

"That is not what I'm saying," said Redman, raising a finger to point at her, "Don't put words in my mouth Miss Gainsborough."

Aerith went silent again.

Redman turned to type on her computer for a moment before smiling with satisfaction. "There we go, email sent."

She turned back to Aerith. "We're done for today, take the week to think on it. Get yourself into whatever nasty fit you can, then, let it out all. Now, good day Miss Gainsborough."

Aerith got up and left without a word, unease churning in her gut...

*Knock knock knock*

Alberta Redman looked up from the papers on her desk. "Enter."

The spiky black hair of one Zackery Fairy peeked through the door. "You got a minute or sixty doc? We've uh... got a little situation."

She nodded and rose to her feet. "Alright, brief me on the way."

"So...," began Zack as they walked quickly, "Every new SOLDIER gets a partner for their first mission, I got chosen to be Aerith's."

Alberta frowned. "Okay, what went wrong? It should have been something easy."

"Oh it was, went Kalm Fang hunting, was my first mission too," said Zack, before he started looking a little squeamish, "But uh... Aerith really lost it. Like, she absolutely flipped and just butchered them. Screamed a lot while she did it, then she just started bawling when she was done."

"Ah, good," said Alberta, relieved it wasn't an actual emergency, "Stress relief at last."

Zack turned his head to look back at her. "Come again?"

"She's kept her anger and grief inside for the majority of her life," answered Redman, "She needed to let it out. Its why I asked her to be sent out before she was done our sessions."

"Wait, you TOLD her to do that?" asked Zack, incredulous.

"Yes."

Zack blinked a few times and just shook his head. "Wonder which of you two is crazier."

Redman snorted as they entered the elevator and Zack hit a floor number. "You haven't been a SOLDIER that long Zackery, ask a few of the 2nds and 1sts how they let out their aggression."

"By sparring?"

Redman gave him a pitying look. "You'll figure it out one day."

Zack grumbled a little and started squatting, mid elevator ride. "If you say so."

They dinged to the chosen floor and left, making their way down the hall towards the helicopter pad. She found Aerith still strapped in, shivering, a blank and vacant look on her face, her uniform torn a bit, blood generously coating it, drying tear stains on her face. Well... she had certainly let loose. Alberta climbed in and sat down across from her.

"Aerith?"

The girl's gaze turned towards her, and Alberta couldn't help the way she reflexively tensed under it.

"How do you feel?" she asked softly.

"Tired," was all Aerith said, "Just tired."

Alberta nodded. "What were you thinking about when you were..."

"Hojo," said Aerith, giving a hollow laugh, "I'm a little surprised Jenova didn't cross my mind once."

Alberta hummed.

"I thought... I thought you said I was supposed to feel better," said Aerith quietly, eyes focusing in a bit, "I just feel like I'm burnt out inside, that killing Hojo a dozen times doesn't fix anything."

"People often make the mistake that Catharsis on its own is enough to help deal with anger and stress," explained Redman, "It helps let off steam and pressure, to be sure, but you have to understand why that pressure was there, understand the source of your anger, or it will come back, perhaps even worse than before. Tell me, did you re-live anything while you were there?"

Aerith said nothing, looking away while clenching her fists.

"Its about understanding and acknowledging where your anger comes from, why you feel it, that you have a right to feel angry, and letting it out in a way that does not harm yourself or others," explained Alberta, "Just merely acting out does nothing, if it did I'd tell you to just punch a pillow every night before you go to sleep. Some people turn their anger into fuel for their passions, or as motivation to do something, some merely learn how to let it go and move on. Its my hope you can find a way that works best for you."

She smiled sadly. "And no, killing Hojo once, let alone a dozen times, does not undo the damage he's already done. Though I imagine it would be satisfying, and would prevent him from harming anyone else."

"I already know why I'm angry," said Aerith quietly.

"You do," agreed Alberta, "But you have a habit of not wanting to confront it and locking it away. It's worked for you in the past, while you lived as a simple young flower girl, but... not anymore. Not in the high stress situations a SOLDIER will go through, and especially not if you ever confront Jenova or Hojo."

At that, Aerith's eyes sharpened completely into focus and on her. "What?"

"Hojo is a mad freak," spat Alberta, "But he is hyper intelligent and dangerous. You have to be thinking clearly and be aware of yourself and your surroundings if you ever find and go after him. Getting lost in a blood haze, shutting down in fear, or going into panic, won't help you. I imagine it would be the same for Jenova. In all honesty, for every day to day life as a SOLDIER as well. A simple lapse, an emotional response, and with your enhanced strength, you could easily kill someone."

"Accepting and mastering your emotions is crucial," said Redman, "To being a SOLDIER, and to being a better, more healthy person."

She reached over and squeezed Aerith's knee. "Take a week to yourself to spend with your mother and think on it."

With that, she got out of the helicopter and made her way across the platform, pausing to briefly watch Zack squatting again; it was one of the more odd ways she had seen someone burn stress and anxiety, but it worked she supposed, exercising was scientifically proven to do so. Just doing squats randomly was weird. "Give her a minute to herself and she'll be fine."

"Sure thing doc."

Alberta hummed to herself as she walked inside...

"Doctor Redman."

She jumped a bit, turning sharply to see a man leaning against wall next to the door. He wore a red cloak and almost blend into the doorway shadows, chin tucked down towards his neck, arms crossed, unnerving glowing red mako eyes peering at her. "Vincent Valantine I presume?"

He said nothing, merely staring at her.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

"You should be careful," said Vincent in a surprisingly soft voice, "The Planet has a vested interest in all things related to Aerith."

She frowned. "Excuse me?"

The man closed his eyes and sighed, when he opened them, they were gold, glowing and so very intense as they rooted her to the spot as a gaze unlike anything she had ever experienced rested on her. "What he means, young one, is that you are treading on dangerous grounds. The Planet feels what she feels, experiences what she experiences, such is the nature of who she is."

What in the hell? "I don't..."

"Understand, Mind Healer, that she is no ordinary individual, nor standard for one of the lifeblood siphoned calamity infected abominations this foolish little group of humans created that you tend to," said the man in a warning tone, his golden eyes glowing heavily, "She is so much more; has so little understanding of what she is capable of, what she has become, with the awakening of the Fail-Safe. That fails to consider the infusion of lifestream within her. Her merging with more of the Planet's lifeblood was not meant to happen until her time upon the mortal plane was done. Considering her past, this path she walks was unexpected. Perhaps this warning comes late, but, but be careful in how you tread with her, the tending of the mind can damage as much as it may mend; fracture her, and you doom us all."

He shook his head. "She's already come close to that horizon, today was a reminder of that, the Planet would not see her cross it."

He was gone with a whoosh and a flourish of his cloak before Redman could even begin to speak...

"So, where did we leave off?"

Aerith sighed and sat down in the comfy red chair. "There's not honestly that much left unless I get into the nitty-gritty daily trekking across the world and I..."

"I'd rather just move on," she said softly.

"If that is what you wish."

Aerith nodded and took a minute to gather her thoughts. "The Planet is sentient, but not in the way you and I are. It has desires, it has fears, it feels pain, but all on a colossal scale. It will also try to defend itself in such a manner. Long ago it... created a super materia I suppose you could call it. I'm still not sure even to this day if it did it on its own, or if my ancestors had something to do with the process."

"What does it do?"

She weighed revealing the information VS remaining vague on it, and decided it didn't matter. The Turks had been warned a long while ago, they should already have it, or at least be making preparations to grab it. "It's called the Black Materia, and it summons a meteor to impact the planet."

"Why would the Planet create something as monstrous as the Black Materia?" asked Redman, incredulous.

Aerith gave her a 'are you serious look'. "Jenova."

Redman's mouth snapped shut.

"The Black Materia is... special, and dangerous in a way most wouldn't realize," said Aerith, "It was designed specifically to fight Jenova. It was made because of the Calamity. The Black Materia... the meteor it summons, it leaves nothing left. It destroys body and soul, so those infected cannot taint the lifestream."

She bowed her head. "No salvation for the damned, sacrificing pieces to save the whole."

She raised her head and sighed. "Our planet is young by cosmic standards from what Minerva told me. It had nothing prepared or ready, had no concepts of the horror coming. The Black Materia is the most extreme and powerful materia on the Planet because, in its youth, it scrambled and put everything it had into it and the WEAPONs. So much power, so little finesse."

Aerith huffed. "Not that most of that got used before my ancestors put Jenova on ice."

She shook her head. "Anyway, we learned Sephiroth was after it, and went for it ourselves, eventually finding its hiding place."

And the Keystone... wait... had she ever told the Turks about the Keystones needed to enter the Temple? Or about the Temple itself? Now that she thought on it... all she had ever told them was the Black Materia existed, not where. Ah... oops? Well, they were Turks, they'd be able to investigate and piece things together. Maybe. She should probably go talk to Veld or Tseng at some point and give them a nudge to get on it...

But she was distracting herself.

Her stomach was starting to twist in discomfort.

"We... managed to retrieve it," said Aerith, mouth dry, "But Sephiroth was ready and waiting."

"He fought you for it?"

"No."

Aerith clenched her hands together in her lap. "He... mentally controlled my Bodyguard and made him hand it over."

Redman made a tsking sound. "I see."

The therapist peered at Aerith, humming. "There's more to it, isn't there?"

"He... forced my B-bodyguard to attack me," says Aerith, voice weakening.

"Oh dear," murmured Redman, "How bad was it?"

"Bad," Aerith answered.

"I know... I know he was fighting the One Winged Angel," whispered Aerith, arms curling around her stomach at the memory of pain, "I wouldn't be alive if he hadn't. My bodyguard had 1st Class Mako Enhancements closing in on what Sephiroth had, and I was just an unenhanced twig of a girl. He could have killed me with a single blow. There is no reason I should have survived the beating I got until they came and got him off me except that some part of him was holding back."

She looked down. "I should have died there, weeks before I actually did. They burned our most rare and expensive healing items on me. I'm pretty sure they shoved several elixirs down my throat. Miss Fists told me not to worry about it, said it was better to make sure the internal injuries were fully healed."

Her shoulder slumped. "I... it wasn't his fault... but I... I ran away that night. I went off on my own."

Redman gave her a look of sympathy. "It's understandable. Arguably the strongest person in your group could be mentally controlled, getting away was smart..."

She paused. "Except Sephiroth would be out there. Damned if you do damned if you don't."

"There was nothing tactical about it," said Aerith miserably, "I ran away from him, I was afraid of him, I didn't trust him."

"I whispered to his dreams," she said, drawing a confused look from the therapist, but didn't feel like explaining her powers, "I acted as if I were unaffected, I told him not to worry about it, that he should let me," she said, snorting with derision, "Handle Sephiroth, that he should take care of himself so he didn't have a breakdown. I'd chose to take my chances with Sephiroth rather than stay near him."

"I went off on my own," she continued, "Sephiroth could have killed me at any time, but he wanted to try to make my Bodyguard do it for some twisted reason. He risked his entire plan just to try to break my Bodyguard. He allowed me to go where I need to go, to do the prayers needed to counteract the Black Materia. When my Bodyguard finally caught up, Sephiroth tried again, my Bodyguard had his sword swinging down, but managed to break his control at the last second."

"I... I would have been safe if I stayed with him," she whispered, "I was scared for no reason. I... I smiled up at him, so relived, so happy, so proud of him..."

"Then I died," she whispered, the ache of the wound filling her, "Sephiroth came from above and impaled me."

She looked down at her hands. "I died, and all I could think about was how sorry I was. My death made the cracks that Sephiroth would use to shatter my Bodyguard."

Redman said nothing for a long few minutes, mulling it over. "Your Bodyguard resisted in that specific circumstance, but whose to say he would have been able to earlier? Perhaps the weeks it took between the first and second 'possessions' was what he needed to build up his will."

Aerith shrugged and murmured, feeling tired, "I don't know. Maybe the others could have intervened. Gaia knows if the others had been on the altar with me maybe one of them might have spotted Sephiroth and shoved me out of the way, had I just trusted..."

"Aerith, do you know what they say about hindsight?"

She gave the therapist a foul look. "How often do 'they' get a chance to live with knowledge of that hindsight?"

Redman hummed thoughtfully. "I think the saying still fits. You know of what 'might' have happened, but that's not going to happen anymore, is it?"

Her thoughts drifted back to some of the visions she had seen after Minerva faded away. "Not exactly, but who knows how this life might mirror the other."

"Might," said Redman, holding up a finger, "But if you let those possibilities drag you down and control you, you'll never learn to look ahead."

"If you ignore the past, you're doomed to repeat it if you can't learn from the mistakes," countered Aerith.

Redman huffed. "Is it just me, or do you love to argue?"

Aerith smiled a little. "Both?"

They shared a small laugh before Aerith sighed. "That's... it for that part I suppose. Maybe I glossed over a few parts, or skipped a lot of the minor stuff, but..."

She ran a hand through her hair. "That's... that's it. From Midgar to death."

Her thoughts lingered achingly on grayed memories, interactions with her friends. All the joys, the sorrows, everything she would most likely not have with them again. She'd probably meet Cloud again when he came for SOLDIER, but most of the others? She wouldn't know them as she had. She'd never see Tifa again unless she went to her friend's home. Same with Barret and Red. Yuffie... well, there was always a chance she'd bump into the girl and get her materia stolen, but even that was circumspect, with the Wutai War having petered off with the President's lack of interest in it, the whole situation over there might keep Yuffie home. Vincent was a full on Turk again. Cid would be Cid, still chasing the stars, but without AVALANCHE and Shinra to force him to move, he'd stay in his town. Though if she ever went to any public events, there were chances they might interact, but not as before. Reeve and Cait Sith were still possibilities, but she had every intention for him to work on alternative energy sources rather than directing his mechanical creation.

It was loss, another loss, like Zack, but instead of one person, it was like losing a family.

This... it would be a lot harder and she'd need a lot longer to let go of them than she had for Zack...

Sephiroth hums to himself as he spreads the census reports from Nibelheim and Corel out on his desk. He had a name and the beginnings of two other names:

Cloud.

Ti, codenamed Fists.

Ba, codenamed Gunarm.

Cloud and 'Fists' were from Nibelheim, while Gunarm was from Corel. He finally had learned enough solid information to start tracking down these people and having them observed. There was much to ponder and think about from her disclosure about the final stage of her time among the living, but he decided to first and foremost focus on this before considering other ramifications. It would hopefully be the easiest task, then, he could start considering how to acquire them as assets to the company. She implied Cloud would try to become a SOLDIER, so Sephiroth had already made a mental note to keep an eye out, and grant a little leeway if for some reason this Cloud failed the SOLDIER exams.

His eyes flickered over the reports, his lips twitching. "Well, that wasn't difficult."

Cloud Strife.

Tifa Lockheart.

The only two people that fit.

He glances over the brief profile the Turks had put together for him, one for every townsfolk made on a brief observation. Strife is listed as an obvious introvert. No observed friends, somewhat shy, bullied but not hesitant to punch said bullies in the face. Chip on his shoulder as well to prove himself, the Turk observed him telling off his little tormentors, saying he'd become a SOLDIER and be a hero. Still a little young at fourteen, so he'd have a year or so before the boy would be allowed into the cadet program.

He rubs his chin in thought. Its possible the boy's temper and introversion might have failed him. SOLDIERs could be loners, but if they had an authority problem, coupled with being unable to work alongside there peers, there was a chance whoever handled the boy's fate in the program would have turned him away. Of course there could have been other issues or incidents that could have caused expulsion as well. Anything, including mako intolerance, though if he had handled the enhancements Gainsborough implied...

Then he paused to consider it. Consider the memory issue. Consider information Gainsborough did not have. That Strife wouldn't have been the first person to dissociate because of mako enhancements, because of the Jenova Cells in them. It was why SOLDIER had become stricter in their requirements for their cadets. Why they all had to have stronger than normal wills and drives. People tend to start weaker and then grow in strength as they aged. Perhaps Strife wasn't strong enough to handle it as a child, but as he grew and struggled, he became the man Gainsborough would know? Of course, that might not be a problem this time around. Enhancement through Gainsborough's cells wasn't the same as being enhanced through Jenova's cells. There hadn't been an enhancement issue yet since the switch had occurred. He supposed he'd have to wait and see.

Lockheart, mayor's daughter. Popular, outgoing, plenty of friends, neighbor to Strife. Unlike most of the village girls, she was noted to be more rugged. Considered to be a trailblazer, served as a guide through the dangerous monster infested mountains despite her youth. Was apprenticed to a martial artist who lived in the town. Well, that certainly wasn't a bad starting resume. He could easily see her being molded into a Turk. It was a shame though, if SOLDIERs could be females...

Then his thoughts ground to a halt and he pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing. "Right in front of my face."

Aerith survived the process, whats to say that other woman couldn't using her cells?

He reached for his phone and dialed his mother.

There was the crinkling of a phone opening followed by a distracted voice, "Dr. Crescent here."

"Good afternoon Mother," he began, "I have a question for you."

Her voice instantly focused, her full attention on him in a way that always was pleasing, "Of course Sephiroth, I'm always happy to help."

"With Aerith's cells as the base instead of Jenova's, could non-Cetra woman survive the SOLDIER enhancement process?"

"I don't see why not," said Lucrecia, tone going thoughtful, "Jenova cells don't in general take well to the female body, I myself was one of the few that could tolerate it at an acceptable margin. Mako Enhancement exacerbates the problems and," she paused briefly, Sephiroth could faintly hear the sound of clicking and a mouse wheel scrolling, "Are listed to almost always cause fatality in an enhanced female within a week to a month."

"I don't want to ask how many Hojo experimented on to come to that conclusion," said Sephiroth sourly before shifting focus, "Almost always?"

There was a delay before her answer, "I don't know. He doesn't have much notes on the subject, just an addendum saying 'See DG-Project', and that's it. No clue what that is, I haven't seen any other references to it."

Sephiroth hummed, filing 'DG-Project' away as another of Hojo's probable mad side-projects. "Keep an eye out for it I suppose. When you have a chance, could you put together your thoughts and reasonings on the subject that I could present to the President? Opening up SOLDIER to the female gender could recouperate losses from the war, and strengthen our numbers should Jenova become a problem years down the line."

"Yes, that could be a good idea," mused Lucrecia, "Though, I imagine you'd need to look over regulations prior to that happening."

Sephiroth's lips twitched in amusement. "I'd look over the army and Turk's regs as a basis."

They shared a chuckle before Sephiroth brought the call to a close, "Thank you Mother."

"Of course Sephiroth, I'll have it ready by tomorrow."

He raised an eyebrow, glancing down at Lockheart's listed age of thirteen. "It's not immediately urgent, if you have another project you are in the middle of, it can wait."

"We've cleared out Hojo's projects, we're just in the middle of going through his methodology on various things and seeing if any of it can be used, and if so, retesting to see if its legitimate or deceptive. None of it is majorly important, just a backlog we have to work through."

"Very well," he answered, "Just remember to pace yourself."

"Only if you do," she teased back.

He huffed. "I know my limits mother, take care."

"You too."

*Click*

"And my limits are extraordinarily high," he finished as he set down the phone, frowning a little, "But they can be met and breached."

He shifted away from Nibelheim and looked over Corel. It wasn't difficult to find the only person whose name began with a 'Ba'. "Barret Wallace."

He hums in thought as he looks over the man's profile. Strange to see a man whose agreeable to Shinra setting up a Mako Reactor turn into a terrorist. Then again, the burning of one's town and the death of his wife would do that. To old to become a SOLDIER, but it wouldn't be difficult to make sure the man never became an enemy. In fact, the man's wife is listed as being ill. The town was a bit backwater, perhaps Shinra showing up with a doctor might make the man more favorable to Shinra than he already was. Yes, it would be remarkably easy to get the man's loyalty.

He scowled a little, considering the information he had learned on all of Aerith's companions. "It should have been remarkably easy to attain or keep all of their loyalty. Shinra has the poor habit of creating its own enemies either directly or indirectly."

If neither Nibelheim or Corel were destroyed, Strife, Lockheart, and Wallace would never have taken up arms. If Hojo had never gotten his hands on Valantine, the man would have remained a Turk. He wasn't quite sure exactly why Highwind turned on Shinra, it had to be more than just the Rocket failing, unless the man was well and truly obsessed with it. To that end, making sure Palmer wasn't pilfering funds and cutting corners on the Rocket project might be enough. If this 'Red' hadn't been used as an experiment he'd most likely not care, though Sephiroth was very curious on what exactly Red was if he wasn't a human.

Then there was the Kleptomaniac and the Toy Cat, the ones with the least information provided. Two he couldn't yet properly plan or fit into the equation. Though, Gainsborough had given a hint. If she was having a difficult time resisting to go see this 'Toy Cat', it implied he was close. In Midgar perhaps. Something to keep in mind. He nods to himself and gathers the census reports together to be filed away. He then begins to clean up his desk, he'll take his other observations back to his apartment rather than doing them in his office, when his shift is done of course...

Sephiroth settles onto his couch that night, setting a folder of notes and observations from his first listen through of Gainsborough's latest session. He spreads them out, along with neatly laying one recording device after another in a row for if he wanted to relisten to a particular session. He's not expecting to get much sleep tonight. That's alright though, he's gone days, even a week before, in Wutai, without sleep, one night wont phase him. Though dealing with what he learned might. The sins of his other-self already weighed heavily, this adds to them.

He knows he's supposed to be doing this to measure Gainsborough's fitness as a SOLDIER, but, there's to much here to ignore. He looks over little sticky notes wrapped around the recordings, taking the first and reading off his offhand thoughts. His note of Strife being a terrorist was quickly overshadowed by the fact that he had been put under Hojo's knife. Even worse...

He grabbed the recording and played it:

"Hojo," spat Gainsborough, "Screwed up his head so badly and experimented on him. That insane freak was trying to replace Sephiroth, not even days after he died for the first time, Hojo started trying to replace him."

All those years of Hojo pouring Sephiroth's importance down his throat. How he was so superior, unique, important, irreplaceable; the hack started to try and make another him within days of his death. That his death meant nothing in the grand scheme of things, that he was an insignificant replaceable part. His blood boiled with rage, tongue tied with such fury. How he hated that insufferable bastard.

One day he was going to find Hojo and wring his scrawny little neck.

He let out a breath and moved on. Strife inheriting Zackery's memories would have covered all the bases he missed from not actually going through the Cadet Program and training as a SOLDIER, especially if this was from an older and more experienced Zackery, a 1st Class one if he understood Aerith's implications of the phrase 'EX-SOLDIER 1st Class'. To be frank, Strife sounded more like a clone of Zackery than a clone of Sephiroth, albeit until one considers the mental connection and control.

He wrinkles his nose. Then his lips upturn at Gainsborough making the man crossdress. Its amusing, but also a hint that Strife would be willing to do whatever it took, no matter the hit to his pride, to get a job done. That was something he could always respect. Though he would still chuckle over it to himself whenever the thought crossed his mind. Though how none of the men in Cornio's residence wouldn't notice one of their 'ladies' with glowing mako eyes was beyond him to understand.

He also had a timetable, in addition to a cause and effect for why the Sector Seven Plate was dropped. AVALANCHE blew up a reactor, Shinra retaliated with the plate. Albeit, that retaliation was an extreme escalation. In turn, he supposed he had to weigh the destruction of the reactor; how much collateral damage had that cost? How much loss of life had resulted from the fallout of it and the initial explosion? Why that way instead of another? He didn't know, but both factions were easily at fault there.

He then takes careful consideration of Dr. Redman and her daughter. Of Gainsborough's later words on the matter, cruel as they were. The notion that Redman was killed by a SOLDIER who snapped was not a slim possibility, it could easily happen, had happened to others in fact. Perhaps, when he has the moment, he should go over the files of those she had been seeing before she had to change focus onto Gainsborough and making notes to have them watched more closely. There was no guarantee it was any of them and not a future patient, but he'd rather be on the practical, safe side. No need to risk and lose assets when it is preventable. No need to be creating future enemies either by the daughter looking for revenge.

He also has to consider if Redman is already lost to the company or not. That vacation she took to get her mind in order, her comments and remarks about the company since then. Its not that he isn't sympathetic to the woman's plight, but her child is still alive. As he understands it, there is little a mother wouldn't do to protect her child, and knowing that Shinra killed said child...

He doesn't think she will consider leaving until Gainsborough's sessions are done, but after that? He wouldn't be surprised if she wanted to leave and take her daughter to some backwater town far away from Midgar. Except there was one slight problem with that. Her knowledge and clearance level of extremely top secret matters related to the Jenova Project because of being read in to tend to the Cetra. People with that kind of clearance don't retire, they disappear. Its speculation at this point, its not guaranteed she will try to leave; that she might understand she can't leave. She implied she wanted this job to help people, that might keep her her, but truthfully, he didn't know.

He supposed he'd have to wait and see.

He kept reading on his notes, of when his supposedly dead self returned. To kill the President, to begin manipulating Strife. He'd be lying if he said he hadn't considered the consequences of killing President Shinra before. Of going on a killing spree through the Science Department. Only in his fantasies though, so in this, he envied his other self. But only in that. He then considers Gainsborough's escape from Shinra.

It's amusing, to say the least. He chuckles, deciding that he's going to leave the fueled display vehicles where they were and do nothing about them. Who knows, someone might need them. It will certainly be in the back of his mind as an emergency getaway if need be. If it actually ends up being used, the irony wont be lost on him.

He moves on, considering the ache and loss when she talks about her comrades. The pain of loss was a real thing, something he had seen destroy SOLDIERs before. He can recall a pair of twins, two brothers early on in the Wutai War that thought they were invincible together. Then, one of them died. The other first despaired, then grew so suicidally reckless, wanting to die and cause pain to the Wutai at the same time. He didn't last more than a week after his brother perished. Sephiroth knows not to underestimate that pain.

He also knows that is why his other self went after Strife the way he did. Even madness couldn't fully destroy his ability to analyze and hunt for a weakness. Though the obsessive level it went to was a bit much when he could have just flat out killed them all. If his other self has succeeded in forcing Strife to kill Gainsborough... it would have been over. Of that, he's fairly certain. It wouldn't have taken multiple resurrections to win. The stupidity of that though, of being so blind, arrogant, and obsessed, ruffled him.

He shook his head, moving to another recording:

"The Nibelheim incident?"

"It's where he went insane," answered Gainsborough, sighing after, "Where everything went wrong. I wont make excuses for him, but... Angeal was dead, Genesis was losing his mind, Jenova was there to pry at and mentally attack him, the lies Hojo left in the basement for him to read, his entire life up to that point. Zack tried, but he wasn't enough to keep him stable, he couldn't fill the holes."

He rubbed at his face tiredly. "So, is that truly what it takes to destroy me then?"

He weighs it in his mind. The pain of losing his friends, his only true friends. Being mentally attacked... he wondered what it was like? How could one defend against such a thing? Was it possible to strengthen one's mind to withstand assault? Hes not sure, hes not even certain of the concept exists to others. There are trainings and techniques to resist interrogation, he considers carefully if such things could be applied. It's something he'll think about at a later time.

He considers, once again, his youth under Hojo's 'care'. Its not a good foundation, he knows this. He'd like to consider himself beyond it, that it wouldn't affect him anymore, but... evidently it was another crack that he couldn't leave unsealed. The thought of seeking Redman's aid is a sour notion, its also not the first time he's considered it. He toys with the thought for a long minute before decided to shelve it again, but with a timetable this time.

He wants to see if it actually helps Gainsborough, then, and only then, will he bother with it himself.

He moves on, considering Gainsborough's outburst against Redman. He is not honestly that surprised. He could see it building within her when passing her in the halls, especially when she made for the sessions. He was only surprised that it took so long. She certainly was able to shape her words like a weapon if she so chose, that particularly had to hurt Redman. Redman's response to boot her out, and then send her to release her frustration and anger on a mission isn't surprising either.

Though considering Gainsborough is not by nature the type of person who would derive satisfaction from such a thing, he questions how successful it was. He unfortunately has no recording or knowledge of their talk in the helicopter, but considering she was more balanced when she left it according to Zackery's ramblings, he supposed whatever was said helped.

He moves onto the meat of this section, perhaps the most important part. The Black Materia was a materia of such dangerous power. What foolish notion could have consumed his other self to desire such a thing? It could not safely be used, the collateral and catastrophic damage would be immense. Madness was a truly terrifying prospect. That materia should either be destroyed, or kept safely secure in the event they lose and need to take Jenova down with them. Considering the notion of resurrection, of coming back from the dead, the Black Materia sounds like one of the ways his other self could actually be killed.

He shakes his head and reaches for another recording, fast forwarding it to the section he wants:

"He... forced my B-bodyguard to attack me," says Gainsborough, voice weakening.

"Oh dear," murmured Redman, "How bad was it?"

"Bad," Aerith answered.

"I know... I know he was fighting the One Winged Angel," whispered Aerith, arms curling around her stomach at the memory of pain, "I wouldn't be alive if he hadn't. My bodyguard had 1st Class Mako Enhancements closing in on what Sephiroth had, and I was just an unenhanced twig of a girl. He could have killed me with a single blow. There is no reason I should have survived the beating I got until they came and got him off me except that some part of him was holding back."

She looked down. "I should have died there, weeks before I actually did. They burned our most rare and expensive healing items on me. I'm pretty sure they shoved several elixirs down my throat. Miss Fists told me not to worry about it, said it was better to make sure the internal injuries were fully healed."

Her shoulder slumped. "I... it wasn't his fault... but I... I ran away that night. I went off on my own."

This, is what he is technically supposed to be doing. The impact of this on her. He wondered if she had considered how she might react to meeting Strife. If any of this would linger and affect her interactions with him, might make it difficult for them to work together on missions. It is also a revelation of how she perceives betrayal, forced or otherwise. The loss of trust, betrayal deeply shakes her. How she acted afterwards, to flee away from her group of allies was unwise, a panicked and emotional response. An understandable one though, especially for someone not trained with military discipline. Its not damning so long as she's actually learned from it.

The notion of whispering to someone's dreams is... confusing, and not something he'll learn about unless he wants to risk Gainsborough asking why he's bringing up that topic and how he even knows of it. He shelves it as unimportant in the grand scheme of things.

He reaches for the last recording and plays it:

"I went off on my own," she continued, "Sephiroth could have killed me at any time, but he wanted to try to make my Bodyguard do it for some twisted reason. He risked his entire plan just to try to break my Bodyguard. He allowed me to go where I need to go, to do the prayers needed to counteract the Black Materia. When my Bodyguard finally caught up, Sephiroth tried again, my Bodyguard had his sword swinging down, but managed to break his control at the last second."

"I... I would have been safe if I stayed with him," she whispered, "I was scared for no reason. I... I smiled up at him, so relived, so happy, so proud of him..."

"Then I died," she whispered, the ache of the wound filling her, "Sephiroth came from above and impaled me."

She looked down at her hands. "I died, and I'll I could think was how sorry I was. My death made the cracks that Sephiroth would use to shatter my Bodyguard."

His other self killed her on the alter, after trying to force Strife to do the crime for him. Sephiroth has never been particularly fond of other's doing his work for him. Sharing the load, yes. Assigning assets to missions when he is busy elsewhere, yes. But when there is something to be done that requires dirtying his own hands, he will do that himself. He's no saint, not after Wutai, but this... disgusts him on many levels. Especially with what Gainsborough said.

His other self let his enemy potentially ruin his plan just for some mad twisted scheme? Foolish and stupid. Its beyond aggravating that any incarnation of himself would commit to such an idiotic methodology. His other self had weeks to kill Gainsborough when she was on her own, and this was his path instead. He exhales through his nose and shakes his head.

He sets down the recording and mulls over it all. He's curious how this all ended. Does she know the details? How things transpired after she died? How much was she aware of after death? He supposes he will have to wait and see...

Author's Notes:

Guest: I'm sorry _ , I hate grammar.

UnLike Us: He already had the name Cloud and knew he was enhanced, and linked it with a few hints here, and the Bodyguard being the only enhanced one of the group aside from Vincent. IDK if this was as indepth as it could be, there's a lot of stuff to cover, and it has been ages since I played FF7, not to mention Aerith's trying not to give their identities away. Mayhaps I missed some of the more lively minor stuff, but here it is.

Azure Shine: Letting go as in not letting it consume her, not obsessing over Zack. If their relationship were to start up again anyway, she'd go for it, but she's not going to cling to Zack and try to force it.

Everyone else: Thanks for the comments.