Close Calls

Summary: See ch1

Disclaimer: Ten chapters in and their still not mine

A/N: Since I won't be able to post tomorrow, I'm going to give you guys two chapters tonight! If you like reading a new chapter every night, save this one for tomorrow! (Hey, it's an idea

Letting Her Go

When Olivia returned to Elliot's room she found it to be full. Although Cragen had left, Elliot's kids were now there.

When Olivia peeked her head in, it broke her heart. Elizabeth had her arms wrapped around her mother, and she was crying into her abdomen. Maureen sat in the chair that Olivia had slept in as tears silently streamed down her face. Kathleen stood on the other side of Elliot's bed, and just stared down at her father, and Dickie was sitting in a chair that was pushed against the wall, completely silent. She could tell these children were broken, and terrified that they could lose their father.

Olivia couldn't bare to see these kids looking like that. She cared so much for Elliot's kids, and felt horrible that she was the cause for their heart ache.

She quietly turned around, and headed back down the hall, but not before Kathleen had spotted her in the door way. She quickly turned and followed her out of the room and down the hall.

"Olivia, wait!" She called.

Olivia froze. She was in for it now.

"Where are you going?" Kathleen asked.

"I, uh, I." Olivia stuttered. "I was just going." She finally said.

"Why?" The girl asked. "I'm sure Daddy would want you in there."

"I didn't think you guys wanted to see me." Olivia said truthfully.

"Liv, you're like family. This is a tough thing for everyone, and we all need to lean on each other to get through this. Why wouldn't we want you there to help us?" She asked.

Olivia was touched by what the seventeen year old said. Elliot was right; she was wise beyond her years.

When Olivia didn't give and answer Kathleen simply wrapped her arm around Olivia's shoulder. "Come on, let's get back in there." She said with a weak smile.

Olivia sat with Elliot's family for a few hours before Kathy finally decided it was time for the kids to go home. Munch and Fin came to visit for a while with Casey. While they were there they forced Olivia to get home to take a shower and a clean pair of cloths.

When she got back Kathy and the kids were there again. This time she let them be alone with their father. By the time seven o'clock rolled around the room again stood empty.

Olivia re-took her seat next to Elliot.

"You really need to wake up Elliot." She whispered at his bed side. "Because I need you. I know that I like to pretend to be strong, and independent, but the truth is, I'm only strong when I'm with you." She took a deep breath, and paused for a moment. "I … I need you Elliot." She whispered, taking his limp hand in hers. "I… I love you." She finally revealed and then paused. "So… you have to get better Stabler. Because I can't do this without you."

Olivia was so focused on Elliot that she hadn't even heard the man standing in the doorway, but he had heard her.

Kevin had come, just as he told her he would to see how both she and Elliot were doing. He stood outside the door and listened when he heard Olivia speaking. To his surprise, he hadn't been entirely surprised with what he heard. Olivia had been apprehensive to the fact that he had told her he loved her, and he had noticed the way Olivia always seemed to become a little lighter when Elliot was in the room, but it didn't make the fact that the woman he loved was in love with another man, hurt any less.

He cleared his throat to let Olivia know that he was present.

Olivia's head shot up, she hadn't realized that she had an audience when she confessed her most deepest feelings to what she thought was an empty room and a comatose man.

"Kevin!" Olivia said in shock. How much had he heard?

"When… when you said that you loved him yesterday… you didn't mean as a brother, did you?" Kevin simply asked. He didn't want to dance around this.

"I…" Olivia began, releasing Elliot's hand and rising to meet Kevin.

"I just want the truth Olivia." He said gently.

Olivia hung her head for a moment, and then lifted it back to meet Kevin's gaze head on. "I'm sorry Kevin. I… I never meant for this to happen." She said.

"Can't help who you love." He said blandly. "Believe me, I know."

"I tried Kev. I really did." Olivia tried to explain as tears began falling from her eyes.

"I know you did. But he makes you happy. I just want you to be happy Liv." Kevin said, wiping at her tears. "If we were meant to be, we'd be."

"So is this it?" She asked, even though she already knew the answer.

"Yeah, I think so." Kevin answered with a sad smile. "Hey, it was good while it lasted." He offered.

"It was great while it lasted." Olivia smiled.

Kevin pulled her into a warm embrace.

"I'm prayin for him Liv." He whispered into her ear.

"Thank you." Olivia smiled as they separated.

Kevin offered one final smile before turning and leaving the room. While he was upset to be letting her go, he realized that she would never be his. Her heart belonged to the man lying comatose in that hospital bed; to the man who would have given his life to spare hers. Kevin realized that Olivia Benson and Elliot Stabler simply belonged together, and he refused to get in the way of that.

After Kevin left her room, Olivia once again sat in the chair that she was almost sure was beginning to take the shape of her butt she had been sitting in it for so long. It was beginning to get chilly in the room, so she pulled her coat over her body, and leaned back into the chair.

"You gotta get better Stabler," She whispered into the dark. "I don't know what I'm gonna do without you." She said, before once again finally succumbing to the sleep her body was so desperately craving.

It was midnight before Kathy finally got a free minute to check on Elliot. She was quiet so as to not wake Olivia. She knew that it had been a while since she had slept.

She walked over to Elliot's sleeping form, and traced the lines of his face softly with her hands.

"Hey Elliot." She said quietly. "Now, I know that we haven't exactly been on the best terms for the past couple of months, but you need to listen to me for a sec." She said before sniffling.

"You have to get better. There are way too many people in this world who still need you. The kids are going out of their minds. I don't think Lizzie has stopped crying since I told her. Kathleen refuses to eat, and Maureen hasn't slept, and is making her self physically sick over this whole thing. I think Dickie's dealing with it the toughest though El. He won't even come out of his room. At least with the girls, I can eventually fight them into talking to me, but Dickie hasn't said a word since I told them what happened." She told him.

"Then there's everyone at work. Form what I hear, Munch and Fin haven't as much as made wise cracks at each other since you were admitted, Cragen's been spending all his time at the office in case the hospital calls with good news, and then there's Casey. She's worried sick. I was talking to her boyfriend this afternoon when she came to visit. He tells me that she's having trouble sleeping too." She smiled for a moment.

"Then, there's Olivia." Kathy paused as she looked over at her for a moment; just to be sure she really was asleep. "She loves you Elliot; so much. For whatever reason, this woman has sacrificed love for so long, and you can't leave her now that she's ready to let someone in." Kathy paused again as tears began forming in her eyes.

"Then there's me." She said, barely making any noise at all. "Even though I may not love you like I did when we were kids, I'll always love you. And while I may not be able to live under the same roof as you, I'm not ready to live without you in my world at all." With that she squeezed his hand gently. "You have to get past this." She finished before leaving the room once more.

TBC... okay, tell me what you think!