Title: perverse reverse
Rating: pg-13
Pairings/characters: Naruto, Ino, Sakura
Word count: 876
Warnings: none
Summary: Naruto is an expert when it comes to thinking up this type of thing
Dedication: Ookami. 'Cause it's her birthday present :D
Prompt: -------- jutsu 'boy style'
A/N: oh, this was so much fun for me. I loved thinking up the dialogue between Naruto and Ino. This is dialogue filled, because I really love writing conversations, so I hope nobody's really bored by that.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, even if I'd like to
Normally, Ino wouldn't have even thought about asking Naruto for help. With anything. Ever. But this was the exception. It was one of the specialties he excelled at, better then anyone else in the whole village.
He sat and stared blankly while she explained, completely focused for once. When Ino had finished describing her situation, he scratched his head and frowned a little.
"So, it's gotta be somethin' good right? To get even? I mean, this kind of thing, ya can't go at it half-assed." Naruto grinned up at her from the log he was perched on.
She smirked back. "So, you've got any ideas?"
If Naruto's grin got any wider, it'd fall off his face. He knew very well she didn't need an answer. He practically farted ideas for this kind of stuff.
"Ok, before you tell me any random possibilities, some rules, okay dork?" Ino poked Naruto's forehead protector. "One) you break any of the following rules and I'll tell forehead girl you were in on it. Two) nothing too childish. It's got to be pretty sophisticated, so put your best effort into it. And three) it's got to be totally, completely, incredibly humiliating."
"Yep, yep. Got it…. Ya know," Naruto's grin became almost predatory as he stood, the same look that would cause Kakashi to sigh in exasperation and Iruka to watch him like a hawk "I have this one thing… it's pretty useful… I bet someone's told ya about it, and all it would take are a few minor changes."
Ino put her hands on her hips and glared at him with her best 'I'm the boss, do as I say' look. "Look, just tell me already!"
"Well, you're practically shameless, right?"
Ino punched him.
"So, that's pretty much the idea." Naruto, now sporting a lovely black eye, finished whispering the devious plot into Ino's ear.
Ino thought about it for a moment. "So it'd be like the, you know-"
"'Cept in reverse. Yeah. What do you think?"
Ino stared at him for moment before promptly smacking him on the back of the head in a good-natured-sort-of-way.
"That, Naruto, may be one of the most genius ideas I've ever heard. And I'm on Shikamaru's team. Oh, and if you tell him I aid that, I'll kill you."
"Ehehheh. Yeah, well, there are still some bugs to sort out. I mean, normally it'll just plain work, but girls… well, you're more specific, right?"
Ino nodded. "Yeah, it's got to be pretty well chosen in order to work right."
"Hey! Hey! I know! You could use my image!"
"UGH! Hell, I wouldn't wish a fate like that on my worst enemy." Ino blinked "which, come to think of it, makes sense, given that I'm going up against my worst enemy."
"Yeah, yeah, ok… well, who do we know who would work?" Naruto asked.
Ino thought about it for a moment before gasping.
"What?" Naruto stared at her.
Ino started to answer then squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head, a weird sort of grin appearing on her face. Finally, after a few moments of internal debate, she leaned forward and whispered something in Naruto's ear. He made a disgusted face
"Ewwww."
"Well, I know from your perspective you'd think that. But for the jutsu, how would that work?"
Naruto recovered from the fake vomiting he'd been pantomiming since Ino had told him her idea. "Yeah… ok, it'd work. But you've got to work out the very specifics in your own! Cause I don't really… I mean… ugh…" he shuddered.
"Fine. Now, let's get to work." Ino smirked, rubbing her hands together conspiratorially.
"Ooohh, fooorrrehead girl?" Ino called out in a singsong fashion to Sakura. The pink haired Kunoichi turned to look down the some-what crowded street towards where her rival was running up to her.
"What do you want, Ino-pig?" Sakura asked, staring suspiciously at Ino. That smirk on her face wasn't exactly one that you'd see on an innocent angel.
"Weellll… the other day, you managed to completely humiliate me in front of my team. So now…" Ino spread her arms to indicate the bust road about them "I'm gonna embarrass you in front of everyone and you can make a choice. You see, I'm merciful. You can be embarrassed by demonstration. Or you can just out and admit to everyone here at the top of your lungs that you're a pervert."
Sakura shook her head. "Ino, Ino, Ino. Pig-girl. First of all, I'm not a pervert, or at very least, I'm less of one then you are. And second, on what grounds, would I ever give in to you?"
Ino's smile oozed evil. "I was so hoping you'd say of something like that. Allow me to show my new trick."
She proceeded to make the needed hand sign and calmly said the name of the jutsu, leaving Sakura about two second to blink at the familiar name and think 'what the hell?' before high blood pressure cause her nose to explode in twin geysers of blood.
Because, when faced with a boy-versioned sexy-no-jutsu with the looks of Uchiha Sasuke, there was really no chance of survival for the poor kunoichi.