Cure Narrative 41: Defying Fate

Season: Futari wa Precure (Max Heart)

Pairing: Honoka x Kiriya

Summary: To live, to fight, to love... what's the correct choice?

Italics: thoughts

(Kiriya's POV)

I had decided.

When I lost my sister, my only family, I decided I would choose to live.

I decided that the tears I shed then would be my first and my last.

From then on, I decided I would fight to be mighty and victorious, to be alive eternally.

I resolved to defeat the Precures with my own hands, that was why I needed to come clean with Honoka-san.

After all, she will fall sooner or later. If she still can't learn of the truth by then, it's just sad.

Besides, there's no point in keeping up my disguise anymore, is there?

There's no point in being hung up over a wish that cannot be fulfilled. Even when disguised, I cannot change who I am, I cannot change my destiny.

Even so...

Though my voice was calm now, I truly wanted to scream so that it may reach the heaven.

Rain.

Great! Rain! Pour! Pour harder! Please wash away my hesitation!

She brought her umbrella over my head, and once again I wished for nothing more but to indulge in her everlasting kindness.

But I could no longer do such a thing. It was cruel to me, and to her as well.

As such, I walked out from under the umbrella and let the cold rain soak me to the bones.

It would surely end once she heard the truth anyway.

"This can't be...! Kiriya-kun... This isn't true...!" Recognising the Prism Stone on my pendant, Honoka-san's eyes filled with alert. She let go of her umbrella in disbelief.

I explained everything to her, my mission and what I chose to do, "I will not run from my fate, even if I suffer from it."

"Kiriya-kun..."

I stared at the sky, briefly wondering whether my pain would vanish if I were to arrive up above, "Perhaps if I were to be born in this world instead, my fate could've been different."

"Fate..." she repeated. And for a few moments, we simply fell silent and stared into each other's eyes.

Until she covered them, "Kiriya-kun..." her voice was shaking. It must've been because she was drenched, there was no way she could get emotional over someone she knew for barely a month and was just revealed to be her sworn enemy.

"S-sorry..." with that, she dashed past me.

That's right... just like her umbrella, let her kindness be blown away by the storm...

Without that kindness, she wouldn't feel painful over my betrayal, right?

Heh. Who did I think I am? Why would she feel anything for a lowlife like me anyway?

I decided to give her a little time, fighting her in this state of mind would be unfair.

Although, even after two days, I still couldn't bring myself to face her.

I stopped before the front gate of her mansion, her dog bared its teeth and growled at me from a distance.

Ah well, at least someone knows who's the bad guy.

But since it's convenient, I don't mind taking the risk.

I took out a paper and wrote down what I should've said face to face. I leapt across the gate (a simple task for a non-human), the dog was about to bark but I closed its mouth, "Shh! Don't let her know I'm here."

The dog smelled my hand (I've read somewhere that dogs do this often), we seemingly reached a silent consensus.

I heaved a small sigh of relief and put my paper in front of the dog, "Listen to me. I need you to deliver my message, bring this to your young mistress, okay?"

I felt its suspicion and alert toward me.

"I promise I'll leave right after you do this."

Tentatively it picked up the paper and retreated to the mansion.

This is it. There's no turning back now. It's either me who kill them, or them who kill me.

Finally, at 4am the next day, the time had come.

I knew with absolute certainty that this fight would be the most painful one in my life, no matter how long my life may become.

But if I had the ability to deceive them for so long, why not deceive myself as well? I could convince myself to hate them, to think that I want to kill them, to blame them for taking my only family away from me. I would have no problem fighting them this way.

And so it began, the final stage brought about by our fateful encounter.

But this inner conflict, doubling with each passing moment since I delivered the first strike with my own hands, proved my pathetic failure in trying to deceive my heart.

I sought to change what I must do, what I was born to do. I sought a future with you by my side, so much so that I felt my heart was about to burst open.

Even so, there was no choice but to press onward, but to keep fighting, yelling, denying my desires, hurting the one girl who made me feel something I never had before and in turn, hurting myself.

Stop it...

Stop trying to convince me to come back to the 'good side', you two... There is no 'good side' for me to return to.

Stop calling me a friend... stop claiming that I had changed... stop saying that I had had fun with all of you... Because if you say such a thing... I feel like it might just become true...!

But it shouldn't become true! It can't! It's not meant to! It's all too late now...

Why...? Why can't you just fight me like how you fight my predecessors? Things would be simpler that way. Neither of us would have to endure all this horrible agony until the moment one of us eventually overpowers the other and end them. Why do you always have to make things so complicated!? Why do you always make my life so much harder!? And yet...

Why do you always make everything so much more wonderful? Why do you make the world so much brighter? Why does meeting you inspire my heart so much?

My mind did everything it could to stop my body from moving, but my fists still connected, time and time again, pointlessly and cruelly.

And she took it, she just took it. It was obvious that she didn't plan to stop until the entirety of her pale skin was covered in bruises, because she couldn't bring herself to hurt me.

I'm sorry... I'm sorry. I'm sorry! I'M SORRY! FORGIVE ME!

No matter how much I apologised, her screams still clawed and wrenched at my heart every time.

I cannot hesitate! I'm fighting in order to stay alive, unlike my sister! I need to fight, I need to stay alive!

But...

Standing here above her, my arm and impulses urged me to deliver the final blow, but my everything else prevented me from it.

Cure Black shoved me aside. I skidded on the ground for a few metres before the momentum ran out, the impact of the shove should be painful to her too if it was this strong.

Just as I predicted, she fell to the ground, both of them, must be tired.

I panted. I was tired too. Really tired. So very tired.

Yes, I was physically tired. But mainly, I was mentally extremely exhausted.

Not knowing things tires me. Feeling lost tires me. Contradiction tires me. All of which were happening right now.

"Why? Why do you beat yourselves up for the creatures of the Garden of Light? It doesn't involve you two at all!" I asked. Even though I knew this wouldn't work in the long term, I wanted them to temporarily run away from their mission, so that we can at least delay this battle.

That was the stupidest idea I had ever had.

"There's no one aside from us who can protect them!" Cure Black shouted back.

They wouldn't even care when their kindness is searing their bones and flesh, what did I expect?

"No matter what happens to us, we will never hand over the Prism Stone!" Cure White collapsed right after saying this.

"White!" Cure Black caught her partner in her arms, "Honoka!"

I worried, I actually worried, worrying for her when I was the reason why she collapsed. Wasn't this laughable?

"Kiriya-kun, did you really want to see Honoka like this!? Would you be satisfied taking the Prism Stone after doing all this!?" Cure Black yelled, on the brink of crying.

Enough! My heart screamed to me.

She's right. Would I truly be satisfied if I stayed alive at the cost of their lives? Do I want to build a victory on the despair of all who live in the Garden of Rainbows and the Garden of Light? A victory at the cost of Misumi-senpai's tears and Honoka-san's pain?

I still didn't know.

But one thing was made absolutely clear to me: enough is enough.

She had fallen down right before my eyes. She had fallen down because of me, because of her kindness, because she just couldn't leave me alone.

And because I had taken advantage of that.

Enough. I don't want her to get hurt anymore...

I was born to have but one purpose — to serve the Dark King. I was never meant to be worth anything more.

But Honoka-san was different. She treated me like I was important. She tended to a tiny cut on my finger like it was a big deal. She talked with me and smiled at me like she enjoyed being next to me. She apologised to me like my feelings should be respected. She would feel hurt if she saw me crying, and she would feel satisfied if I smiled in joy... and so much more.

The one who created me never did this. My companions never did this. Not even my only family did anything like this. Honoka-san was special, more than a companion, but not exactly a family... then what was she to me?

Whatever she was to me, somehow, I felt that my own life was less significant, if it meant she would no longer need to endure this, if it meant we could end this excruciatingly pointless battle already!

When that thought occurred to me, I yielded to the treacherous voice inside of me, constantly telling me to betray my creator, my God, for a single human girl.

I tore off my Prism Stone and placed it gently in her hand, so as to show respect and admiration for their altruism, and as an atonement for the deception and betrayal I brought upon them.

I wrapped my hands around hers, and I didn't plan to let go, if I didn't feel the presence of evil and death behind my back.

As expected, really. The moment I chose this path was the moment I reached a dead end. There was no point in putting up a fight, even if I wholeheartedly wished to stay by her side forever.

Besides, I had already altered my fate, sufficient to ensure a tomorrow for her. That alone was enough, I believed in her future more than my own, more than this life which was meant to crumple apart as soon as a glimmer of light enters.

"It seems this is as far as I can run from my fate."

Turning around, I was faced with the materialisation of death himself (in my opinion).

"Farewell."

With certain steps, I headed toward the dead end in my path. Honoka-san tried to stop me, she screamed though her voice was starting to crack, and she obviously wanted to run at me and grab my hand and yank at it until I stop.

But Misumi-senpai held her back, she respected my choice and wanted Honoka-san to accept it as well.

It was difficult for her, I understood, but there was no other choice, one cannot keep on running from one's fate.

I stepped into the endless void, but I glanced back, simply one last look at her would fill me with courage to face the end.

Thank you for everything.

At this moment, I finally understood. Though I was sure I had not the vaguest idea about this concept before today, somehow it occurred to me.

This profound and mysterious bond we shared was none other than what people refer to as "love" long before either of us were born.

Servants of darkness should never know this, which means I was a defect then.

But I was thankful for this "defect".

Because of this "defect", I encountered you, we spent so much time together, you taught me many things I never knew, I experienced what it meant to be a human.

I even got to fall in love with you.

Now then, if I were allowed to hold onto this love as darkness engulfs me and robs me of my senses, it wouldn't really be so bad.

Goodbye. I hope I never see you on this side.

End of Chapter 41

A/N: Yes, I threw in a ton of references to the song Heart To Heart just because it fits and it's just so lovely and it's one of my favourite songs in the franchise I can't not do this. And also, writing this after more than two years since the publishing of my first ever fanfic makes my first fic looks absolutely naive and stupid lol.