Underneath the mask
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Bi-polar by Assemblage 23 so I am not making anything off this fic except maybe an enemy or two
"words"
'Thoughts'
lyrics
Naruto woke up and glanced around his bleak and dreary room. Pushing back the blanket he pulled himself off the lousy excuse for a bed and moved to the closet. He hated wearing orange but it helped keep people from feeling threatened by his presence. Moving back into the kitchen he fixed a bowel of ramen and ate quickly so as not to be late for his team meeting. As he moved to the door he paused before opening the door.
Taking a deep breath he felt his mask slide into place as he opened the door and bound outside.
I haven't felt so alive in years
The sun is shinning down on me
My eyes are welling up with tears
Tears of joy, tears of ecstasy.
Running from roof to roof laughing and making as much noise as possible he slowly made his way to the meeting spot of team 7. Landing on the ground he took off at a dead run towards the pink haired girl standing on the bridge with the so called emo avenger. Sliding to a stop behind them he bellowed out his typical greeting of "HI, SAKURA-CHAN!!!"
She greeted him with her usual response a fist to his head then she whirled back to facing her desire. The dark haired bastard only paused in his cool posture to give his usual call of "Dobe". Naruto smiled his typical dumb smile and they were none the wiser.
Emotions I once kept concealed
Now flow freely like a river
Life's great mysteries revealed
Love's great promise delivered
Kakashi finally showed up and Sakura and Naruto yelled at his lousy excuse as they have at every other meeting. Smiling the one eyes jounnin gestured for the three preteens to follow him out into the field. Naruto knew exactly what was going to happen he just played along to keep up his dumb appearance. "Naruto I want you to work on Chakra control with Sakura who needs to work on her stamina." With that he would pull Sasuke aside and move down the field out of ear shot to teach his precious student a new jutsu.
Naruto would start working on controlling his chakra and Sakura would start to mumble about being stuck with the dobe and hoping his stupidity wouldn't rub off on her.
I hate my life I want to die
I was just pretending all this time
A mask I wear so I don't bare
My soul to the cold, harsh world out there
Try to prevail but only fail
Each time on a grander and grander scale
My life is worthless and so am I
I hate my life I want to die.
When practice is over Naruto quickly leaves the field heading for a place where he can feel at least a little complete and happy.
Flying into the restaurant he leaps up on the barstool and greets the young woman behind the counter. Smiling she sets about preparing his order. They chat as he eats his ramen not caring that others pass outside mocking him and calling him names.
When he is finished he takes off running down the street ignoring the shouts of common people hurling insults and an occasional object at his direction. He sees the break in the trees which hide a small clearing where he likes to train.
The landscape rises to meet my feet
The sky descends to fill my arms
For once I finally feel complete
For once I know I can't be harmed
However when he clears the trees the sight stops him cold.
Sasuke was training in his field with Kakashi. Kakashi turned and saw him standing there. "Naruto this is a private lesson I will not have you spying on Sasuke in hopes of undermining him."
Naruto felt his jaw drop. He didn't bother to say anything they wouldn't listen anyways turning he walked back through the bushes only to face the Sasuke fan club. The leader stepped forward and raised a fist menacingly. "How dare you try and undermine our precious Sasuke." Naruto quickly jumped into the trees running as fast as he could.
All I know is light and love
I feel that I could live forever
While others' troubles seem to grow
I have no problems whatsoever
Barely managing to outrun the crazed fan girls out for his blood he saw that it was getting dark and made his way home. However before he could get his door open he was confronted by his manager demanding this weeks rent at triple the going rate Naruto knew that the land lord was raising the rates so that in one week he spent enough that he could rent the apartment for a month, but he had no choice no other place would let him in.
Paying the land lord he finally was able to move inside and let his mask fall. He hated living here but he had no choice. Walking over to his molding couch he sat down and let his body relax. He had hoped to have enough money to afford buying some good food but the manager's greed had ruined that. Now he was stuck once more eating ramen for the week.
I hate my life I want to die
I was just pretending all this time
A mask I wear so I don't bare
My soul to the cold, harsh world out there
Try to prevail but only fail
Each time on a grander and grander scale
My life is worthless and so am I
I hate my life I want to die.
Pushing himself up he moved once more into the kitchen and made another batch of ramen. Without using the chop sticks he just swallowed the contents. He knew he couldn't talk to the hokage about this if the old man helped him out anymore than he already had there would be a riot. With nothing further to do he made his way to his bed and slipped under the covers. Staring out the window he watched the few visible stars shine.
The epiphany that came to fall
Finally helped me reconcile
What I felt wasn't joy at all
All this time it was just denial
His eyes finally grew heavy and with a sigh he fell into a deep sleep never noticing the shadow that extended itself from the wall towards him. His last thoughts before his conscious mind relinquished control was that maybe this time they would get it right and end his pain if not well he had another glorious day to look forward to.
I hate my life I want to die
I was just pretending all this time
A mask I wear so I don't bare
My soul to the cold, harsh world out there
Try to prevail but only fail
Each time on a grander and grander scale
My life is worthless and so am I
I hate my life I want to die.