Chapter 5: After Her Rude Awakening

All you need is love, all you need is love, love…love is all you need…

I frowned. "Leo, do you mind putting that down?"

The old man shrugged, tugging his gray beard. "It's too quiet around here, man. Besides, these guys are really good."

"Yeah, good at being mushy," I dictated, holding up a dismantled part of a camera for him to see. "But I can't concentrate on this with all that noise. So would you please?"

"All right. Fine," he said, shrugging again and turning the knob of the radio off. Silence was once again restored in the small photohut.

"Thank you," I told him gratefully, returning to my work.

Although I didn't really know what I was doing, trying to fix things are actually in my list to keep my head preoccupied. But it felt like a million years trying to put the whole damn camera together, not making things any easier for me. I could've thrown the thing hours ago.

And if it wasn't after finding out the whole breakup story of Kelso and Jackie, I could've done anything else.

Ever since the breakup happened, I kinda got the feeling that I'm suddenly pushed under a magnifying glass. Jackie will start looking for answers, and I know that I'm the first one she'll be looking for. Because I'm the one stupid enough to drop hints instead of telling her the whole damn truth. I'm the one who's not supposed to give a crap about the whole situation here, right?

"Fixed!" I declared, throwing the broken camera out the window, smashing it into a million pieces. "Just tell the owner to go and not buy anything from Bargain Bob, all right?"

My voice came out unexpectedly sharp, but Leo was unmindful of it, his attention on an old issue of Playboy. "Cool. I wish I thought of that. You're done for today, man."

I was relieved. "Thanks Leo." And without waiting for his reply, I took off with my jacket and started to walk down the frosty mid-afternoon streets, collecting my thoughts.

A week had passed since Forman and Donna finally told me about what happened. It was Jackie after all, who caught Kelso and Laurie sucking their faces off each other, as Donna called it. After that, images of Jackie sulking to Donna at the porch, images of Kelso trying to win her back, images of the two topping the whole day off with a fight had been a blur to me. It was like a soap that wouldn't end. It's like everywhere I go, Kelso and Jackie's breakup headline. Forman's house, they know. School, they know. The Hub, they know. Everyone knows about everybody's business here in Point Place. And I'm getting pretty sick and tired of hearing about it.

Not to mention its making me really worried. Nauseatingly worried.

I rubbed my temples. It's the worrying part that gave me a headache. Knowing Kelso, that narrow head of his would make him forget the whole thing easily, but there was no telling how Jackie is right now. Soon I've been seeing less and less of her for the last couple of days. Only a few glimpses here and there in school, but that's about it. Talking to someone would be fairly pointless because they'll figure something completely out of the blue from me. And it's driving me crazy.

I didn't want them to break up. I wanted Kelso to suffer, but I didn't want Jackie to suffer as well. And besides, all Kelso wants is some ass, and all Jackie wants is someone to worship the ground she walked on. Didn't they just both get what they wanted?

Before I made another turn, I stopped and stood before this super-fancy five-star French restaurant. Le Papillon, it read, full of wealthy, sophisticated people spending hundreds of dollars for a piece of tasty chicken. I scowled, imagining myself throwing a big boulder through the huge pane glass window.

All of a sudden I saw someone familiar through the thick glass, talking to the hostess, carrying what looked like two doggy bags in those hands. Her hands, in fact. She was petite, brunette, beautiful…and only one person owning those qualities slammed into my mind.

Jackie. I peered through the tinted window and strained my eyes to take a closer look.

Yup, it was Jackie all right. Again I was overcome with my usual shambles of emotions whenever I see her, where I would start feeling all flushed and lightheaded accompanied with nausea. I felt my heart pounding in my throat, making me jittery. Damn, she's just so hot…

"Goddamn it…" I muttered, mentally slapping myself.

I am fucking syrupy today. And it was all her fault. I immediately scolded myself for being a little too out of control. It's only been a week of not seeing her and I'm acting as if I couldn't stand not seeing her at all.

Suddenly Jackie began heading towards the doors to exit. I snapped out of my hypnosis and began walking away calmly from the restaurant despite the panic that I felt. Even if she finally got out I don't think she'll notice me. Just a few more steps—

"Hyde? Is that you?"

Too late. I squeezed my eyes shut as I stopped dead in my tracks. Then I realized how foolish I was, trying to run away from her. So I just turned around and acted as if I was a bystander.

"Yeah, you found me," I said, my hands deep in my pockets.

"Oh my God, it is you!" she cried, beginning to run towards me. She let out small pants, her cheeks were pink from the cold, and her hair was blown away like a soft brown cloud. "Did you just happen to pass by?"

I nodded. "I was about to go home from work."

She widened her eyes. "That's exactly what I thought you would answer. Can I borrow you for a while?"

"Why?"

Jackie smiled wryly, holding up the two doggy bags that she was carrying. "We'll have a lunch in the park. Sounds fun, right?"

My own blank look must be etched in my face right now because she suddenly grabbed me by the hand and began pulling me down the sidewalk. I wasn't really in a mood to argue, and I wasn't able to resist, maybe because her grip was too tight, or maybe because the park is only a block away, or maybe because I loved the feeling of her soft, smooth hand touching mine…

I shook the thoughts off and I asked her a question instead. "Why did you have to order it for take-out when you could just home deliver?"

She shrugged. "It's nice to eat out for a change."

"In this weather?" I said incredulously. We were now walking inside the park, where the usual color of green was replaced with brown, orange, and yellow. Leaves were everywhere on the ground, and a gust of wind scattered them, making the scenery colder than it usually is. And it seemed like were the only people there.

"You ask way too much. Here we are!" she announced, standing before an old wooden picnic table. She set the doggy bags down and began taking the food out, sitting down as well. Soon she noticed I was the only one left standing.

"Well, aren't you going to join me?" she asked.

I scowled, my feet firmly planted on the ground. "Jackie, you didn't make me say yes first—''

"Oh, quit being so stubborn, Hyde," she interrupted, opening the tin-foiled packet across her. "You honestly think I would order something you won't like?"

"How the hell do you even know what I want?" I queried sarcastically.

Steam rose from the foil, revealing a roasted whole chicken with vegetables on the side. Jackie kept looking at me, waiting.

"I'm can't eat that," I lied, despite the fact that my mouth was watering.

"But I know you want to."

I glowered at her, feeling violated.

"Look Hyde, just take it. It's only for you. It's roasted to perfection, by the way," she wheedled.

"How about you?"

Jackie took the other doggy bag and opened it, letting out a medium-sized Styrofoam bowl. "I'll be fine with my soup."

I got the feeling that Jackie wouldn't call my bluff, so I just caved in to her coaxing and sat across her, pulling the chicken in front of me. "I'll get even with you. Just you wait," I grumbled.

"Sure you will," she said cheekily, opening her soup. She arranged the napkins neatly and let out other smaller containers from the doggy bag filled with mashed potatoes, corn and carrots, and coleslaw. She found her spoon and began to eat, but the sight before me was way too strange to consider. Too much food is too much.

"What is it with all these food?" I demanded, perplexed. "You're actually planning to eat these all by yourself?"

Jackie wiped her mouth and stirred her soup. "I was actually planning to invite Donna a little later, but I saw you first. So I thought what the heck? You might be a little annoying at times, but at least I won't be bored with you."

I curled my lip with disdain. "That's a very nice thing for you to say."

"You have to at least consider yourself a lucky stiff. It's not everyday I drag guys around to have a lunch date with me."

"You actually call this a date?" I said cockily. "I've had better dates than this one."

"I was out of the playing field for quite a while now," she told me, ignoring my statement. "I've been wasting too much time taking care of that bottom feeder Michael."

She paused, looking down for a few seconds before looking up at me again. "How is Michael, anyways?"

I wanted to tell her that I've been seeing more and more of Kelso and Laurie the past days, but I found that I just can't. "I have no idea."

Jackie gave me a skeptical look.

"He isn't really hanging out in the basement much lately. So…"

"He's with Laurie, isn't he?"

"Well…yeah."

"Well, I don't really care anymore. That's fine for me. I'm glad the whole thing's over. I'm glad that he's off my life. Being single is way more fun!" she tittered, eating her soup happily.

I watched her slurp her soup, then she opened one of those small containers and began digging into the potatoes, feeling way too confused and befuddled to even say anything. I looked down at the untouched roasted chicken in front of me. It looked delicious, but it seemed to have lost my interest. Jackie's strange behavior was more on my mind now. She seemed so happy from the whole thing, so thrilled, so enthusiastic.

Too enthusiastic. Too happy. And that isn't like Jackie at all.

It was all so forced, so phony. She was being super-cheery, dripping with sweetness, I realized. She wasn't being Jackie, wasn't being herself, wasn't being the girl that I always think of all the time. And she was obviously hiding something.

"Jackie, are you all right?"

"Of course I am. Why wouldn't I be?" she said quickly, eating her soup faster.

I grabbed hold of her hand holding the spoon, making her stop. "I'm serious here, princess."

Jackie bore through my eyes for a few minutes without moving, but I wasn't about to let all my defenses down just yet. A staredown is enough to let her know that I'm serious about this. And I actually am.

Then her cheery expression clouded over as she threw the spoon on the grass. "What are you trying to prove, huh?" she said defensively. "That you have another honest opinion about this?"

"You want my honest opinion?" I repeated. "Fine. Honestly, I think what you're doing here is stupid. You're eating more than a pothead should!"

"And who is that? You?" she said, her voice rising up to a shrill. "I can't believe this!"

"Why don't you just quit your Little Mary Sunshine act?" I challenged. "You come in here to bribe me with food and convince me nothing is wrong? You really think I'm that stupid? Admit it. You're obviously still moping about Kelso!"

"No, I am not!" she shrieked, trying to get her hand back. "Let go of me!"

It took her several minutes to loosen my grip before she got her hand back from me, standing up from the table and taking a few steps back while looking at her hand. I stood up as well, managing my cool expression despite the irritation that I felt. She looked horrified at the sight of her digits, which were now swollen red.

"Now look what you did!" she accused, scratching her neck. "And it's making me itch!"

I was instantly confused again. "I don't know what the hell you're talking about."

Jackie looked puzzled. She was still scratching her neck, which in turn became swollen red as well.

"Wait, why are you scratching like that?" I asked.

"I told you, I'm itchy!" she whined now, scratching her neck with both hands. "Not only that, I think my throat is clogging."

"Stop doing that. Let me see," I said, walking towards her to examine it. Her neck was beginning to swell more thickly under her sweater, bumpy on the places she'd scratched on. Patches of red began to appear on her face. "It's getting worse, whatever it is. What soup was that?"

"Shrimp soup," she answered through gritty teeth.

I was about to open my mouth to speak until I saw Jackie's right ear, red and swollen, with the connected parts of her face beginning to react as well. Like half of her face was beginning to look like Jabba the Hutt's. "Oh my God, Jackie…"

"What? What is it?" she asked, panicked.

"Y-your ear, your face…it's s-swelling up like a bitch, man," I stammered.

Jackie gasped, her panic more obvious now. She fumbled through her coat pockets and found a compact, quickly flipping it open and examined half of her face.

"No!" she yelped, falling into the ground with her hands covering her face. "What's happening to me? I look like Jabba the Hutt!"

"I think it's the shrimp," I deduced, helping her up. "I think you're having one of those food allergies. Come on, we got to get you that anti-allergy stuff."

"What?"

"Or Benadryl. I don't know. Maybe we'll just get Mrs. Forman to look at you. The hospital's just—''

"What?" she repeated disbelievingly. "You're trying to help me?"

I shifted my weight uncomfortably. Jackie was looking at me so intensely, as if trying not to believe everything that was happening around her. She knew it wasn't like me to help. Even what I said earlier seemed entirely new to me. So I just went along with it.

"What do you think?" I said in my smartass voice, enough to hide my concern.

"But…don't you think I look disgusting? Aren't you supposed to laugh at me?"

She had a point. It looked repulsive, and if it had been anyone else I would start laughing my ass off. But it was her in front of me. At that point, all I what matters to me now is to get her better, fast. And at that point, I didn't really care if she finally saw the concern and worry now spreading on my face.

"Should I?" I replied gently.

Jackie gave me that look again.

"Why? Can't I help you?"

There was a heavy pause. That look froze in her face, its intensity boring into me. And even though I was wearing my dark shades, I made sure the softness in my eyes stayed. Still, I had to let her know that her stubbornness wouldn't sway me a bit.

Until tears began to form in her eyes.

"No," she retorted in a wobbly voice. "You can't."

I was speechless, but inside I was pained. It sucked to see her cry.

"Jackie, I—''

"I'm sorry…" she whimpered.

Without looking at me she completely turned away and began running towards the park's exit. I thought of chasing after her, but who knows where she'll be going. A few minutes later she was gone and I was the only one left, my mouth agape. Another gust of wind blew, but I was mindless of the cold. My mind was somewhere else.

I sat on the picnic table and leaned against it, stunned. It was a huge mistake to open my mouth without consideration. She went out with this horny idiotic guy, went on a couple of months not knowing that he's going sideways, caught him cheating with a skank, and endured a horrible breakup with what she thought was a perfect relationship. Isn't sympathy the last thing she needs?

"Goddamn it…" I muttered again. I am such an idiot.

Even though it is only thought of as a feeling, is love what everyone really needed?

Sighing, I stood up from the table and surveyed the still-open gourmet foods. One by one, I closed every open container I saw and re-wrapped the foiled ones, including the chicken. I returned each of them in their doggy bags, carried it in each of my hands, then I began to walk to the park's exit, my direction headed for home. I thought of the possible people I could share this with. Forman would love it for sure, and Donna will always be available. I would find Fez anywhere, but sure as hell I won't share any of this with Kelso.

An unknown feeling began to brew at the pit of my stomach, a bad, bad feeling that made me feel generally weak. But in my usual zen fashion, I squashed it down with all my might and ignored it, my chin held defiantly up in the air. After what had happened, the last thing I want was to look weak in front of anybody.

I sighed again. Maybe there's still some pot left.

……

God, I hate that I did that:p

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