A/N: EDIT: Fixed a typo regarding Blake.
Sorry for the delay, Holidays are hell. This...isn't my finest chapter, and its a good bit shorter than I'd like, but it will have to do for now.
Too exhausted. T_T
In other news, my new niece -Nora!- must be protected at all costs.
Guess I have a reason to be the cool uncle now. I SWEAR if my second sister names her daughter Ruby, I'm gonna pass out...!
As ever, the "Embers" rule remains in effect for now.
If folks don't like this, POOF! Away it goes. Deleted! Reviews are the fire that keeps me writing. Without them, I cannot put pen to paper. Simple as that. I work two jobs these days, which means I'm lucky to have four hours to even write. Every bit of feedback matters, large or small~! Your voice matters! Speak up! I repeat, every bit of feedback matters...even if people think it doesn't.
Now then, onto your questions!
Q: How's your health?
A: Better after sleeping for a whole day. Guess my body needed it. I'll have some downtime soon.
And yes, the daily updates will continue. That includes holidays. Hopefully people will be around to read those...
Q: What are you updating next? We needs a schedule!
A: Lets see. Hopefully in order? Don't Judge A Book By Its Cover, The Golden Grimm, Embers, and other stuff. My muse wants to update Genshin and Arcane again, not to mention Practice Makes Perfect a SECOND TIME this month, but I'm trying to reign her in...
The heart wants what the heart wants
T_T
Q: ...Naruto knows the whole criminal underworld, doesn't he?! Does he have contacts in Mistral and Atlas, too?! Or Vacuo?!
A: I can neither confirm nor deny that.
Lets just say he knows people and leave it at that for now.
Q: Jojo references ahoy! I know you're watching Stone Ocean!
A: Ho? Is that so? Whoever told you that? I'll be having a word with them...
But sure, have your wish. I had a little tribute prepared for this chapter anyway.
Q: Naruto...is still the good guy, right?
A: Depends on your view of the word. There was a time when he and Kurama terrified the living hell out of their enemies. Now? Naruto wants to live a peaceful life now, while secretly supporting his kids from the shadows. Case in point for Weiss and Winter -the latter knows, as stated, while the former doesn't- and dear Ruby, as well as those yet to be revealed.
And remember. He said nine. So count on your fingers~! That's three confirmed, a fourth hinted at...
AND FIVE TO GO~!
This will be taking a drastically different route from "Cookies" if that wasn't obvious.
Q: Are you taking requests?
A: If they pique my interests, and if I'm well versed in said format. I've terribly little time, and I've already taken on a Madara request that needs doing...eventually. Not to mention an Ayaka one. I really don't have enough time these days.
Alright, I've kept you long enough.
As ever, I own no references, quotes, themes or memes. Not a wit or a one.
They're tribute, nothing more. That said, I Really had a blast writing this chapter. Ready? Set! Go!
"...excuse me? Harmless, you say? You think he's harmless?! That man is the ANTITHESIS of harmless!
He has befriended some of the worst monsters, villains, and criminals known to Remnant!
His body count numbers in the thousands! And you want to anger him?!"
~?
A Little Bird Told Me
"Stop blowing holes in my shop!"
In hindsight, perhaps it was too much to hope Willow and Summer wouldn't argue.
Naruto ducked, caught a vial of dust as it whistled past his head, and set it down on the table with a withering glower. Both women subsided and sank into their seats. His sole solace in this was the seclusion of his shop; in that he'd somehow managed to get both of them inside -and the wine out!- before all hell broke loose.
But really, could one blame them for fighting? Willow got to see him nearly ever week -and Naruto suspected that would soon become a daily occurrence now that Jacques had been outed- while Summer only just reconciled with him. She'd stumbled back into his life by pure chance. One had nothing to prove. The other, fifteen years to make up for. And yet for all that, they were, each of them, mothers.
Wars had been started over less.
"I was first!"
Summer's hands slammed down on the table, rattling the glasses he'd laid out for them. Fora a moment, her silver eyes almost seemed to flicker with inner flame before she brought herself back under control. Her smile was sweet, but her voice promised murder in its purest form. Even a jinchuuriki knew better than to interfere in a conflict like this.
Best to let them have it out and be done with it.
"So you were." Willow offered a languid smile as she raised a flute of wine to her lips. She took a long moment to savor it. Only then did she continue. "But you let him slip through your fingers and shatter." her head tilted a fraction of an inch, strands of white hair concealing her left eye. "It fell to me to pick up the pieces. Didn't it, dear?"
Naruto looked away and coughed into a fist. "Leave me out of this."
Summer flinched. "I made a mistake...
"Yes, you did." Willow granted her a nod. "A mistake of your own making."
Kurama whistled in the background. "Gonna need some healing chakra for that burn...
"How long was it?" Willow's anger had ever been a cold sort; she didn't burn bright like Summer, her ire, when roused, was a frigid thing indeed. "Oh, yes. Fifteen years. Not a call, not a text, nothing." she raised a hand and conjured a glyph to her fingers, then made a show of inspecting it. "You shut him out. And for what?" a twist of her wrist warped it yet further, conjuring a pair of ghostly white figures in the palm of said hand. One vanished, leaving the other alone. "Your precious worldview, for your belief in black and white. When her fingers moved, they danced to her tune. "He gave you his heart. And you...
Her fist closed, emitting a crackling noise.
...shattered it."
Summer shook with every word. Willow showed no mercy. "He cried. Did you know that?"
Summer made a wounded noise and rounded on him. "You did...?"
"Once." Naruto injected a kernel of truth into her diatribe. "I was drunk at the time...
"Regardless, she could not live with her own failure." Willow tutted. "Where did that bring her? Back to you."
Wintry blue eyes met hers until she looked away. "That still doesn't give you the right to bully her like this. Apologize."
"I will, once I've said my peace." She huffed. "You're hardly to blame." her eyes slid back to Summer, eliciting a squeak from the slight huntress. "You hurt him so very badly. Is it any wonder he'd seek out someone who knew the same pain? Someone who would never, ever betray him?"
Summer's hands bit into the table. "We're together now."
"I don't doubt that." Willow allowed. "He always was soft. But how am I to know you won't leave him again?"
It was the straw that broke the camel's back.
Naruto saw it a moment before it happened and managed to rescue the glasses before she did something rash. "Summer, don't-
Too late. The cloaked huntress surged out of her seat with a snarl, grabbed the table separating her from Willow, and flung it away as though it weighed no more than a pack of matchsticks. It struck the door and bounced off, shredding itself apart as it skittered across the floor. Blast it. He'd like that table.
"Oho?" for her part, Willow remained seated, lips quirked into a small smile. "You're coming closer? After his warning?"
Summer cracked her knuckles. "I can't kick your ass without getting closer.
Willow spread her arms wide. "Then come as close as you like."
"Do you even know how to fight, you drunken-
A glyph swept Summer upright and upended her onto the floor. Willow hadn't budged an inch. "Care to repeat yourself?"
"Yeah," Naruto shrugged. "She's pretty much the definition of a white mage."
The phone rang, shattering the moment.
He all but dove on it.
"Sparks and 'Splosions," he plastered a smile to his face as he drawled into the receiver, "How can I help ya."
...hello again, old friend." a low Mistralian purr answered. "You seem to be in better spirits today.
His smile died an ugly death. "Again, Malachite? You already called me to express your condolences. Whaddya want?"
Willow arched a demure brow.
Summer's head hit her hands, anger momentarily forgotten. "Not another one...!"
"She isn't!" he bit out before returning his attention to the call. "Why are you calling again?"
"Come now, don't be so cold." Little Miss sounded far too pleased for her own good, which usually boded poorly for him. "I'm simply repaying a favor, from one friend to another. My girls told me a fascinating story just last night." There was a hint of something in her tone that had him bridling. "Melanie saw this fascinating bird, roosting down by the northern docks. Isn't that remarkable?"
He physically felt Summer stiffen behind him.
Wasn't hard to see through the double speak. Qrow? Not likely. Didn't sound like his usual dive. Which meant something altogether unpleasant.
His blood turned to ice...then superheated plasma. "It certainly is. And what would the name of this bashful bird be?"
"No need to beat around the bush. I know you've been looking for her. She's got a bounty on her head."
Her? Definitely not Qrow!
...I have, and she does is," he allowed. "She's being difficult."
"And whose fault is that? Maybe you taught her to hide a little too well."
He'd made many mistakes. Teaching her had been one of them. She'd been willing at the time, but she'd learned a little too well.
He had also learned Little Miss didn't give her information freely.
"What do I owe you for this?"
"Not a thing." she sounded like the cat who caught the canary and slaughtered its entire family. "Your little stunt with Junior weakened his gang and gave my Spiders a chance for a little...aggressive expansion down in South Vale. Do be nicer to your nieces next time though, won't you? They're quite cross with you for knocking them around like that.
He fought down a wince. "It was that or kill them."
...fair enough. I'll be in touch."
Naruto hung up with a heavy heart.
One mistake. One slip, and his past came crawling out of the woodwork to torment him. Damn Roman. If he didn't hate him before, he did now.
A harsh crack behind him told him Summer and Willow had resumed their hostilities with a vengeance.
"This is just not my day...
(.0.0.0.)
Today was definitely her day!
Ruby skipped down the street, smiling fit to burst.
She'd done it! She'd finally done it! It had taken no small part of begging cajoling, -even outright bribery on Blake's part!- to get her Team down here, but here they were. She could see the Shop in the distance, less than a block away. A few more steps now! Just a little more! Then she'd finally accomplish her mission. Even if meant Yang giving her the stink eye.
"You're doing it again."
She hummed a little. "Doing what?"
Weiss absolutely hissed. "That! Stop smiling!"
Ruby bounded forward, laughing as a glyph hurtled by.
Blake saw the chance for what it was and took it.
She frowned at her."You're up to something."
Ruby only hummed. "Nope!"
She certainly was.
(.0.0.0.)
"Are ya done?"
Naruto danged Willow and Summer in the air by the back of their necks, holding them as one might a pair of naughty kittens. That, or two grown women covered in dust and dirt. They didn't look much pleased with him at the moment. Fitting, because he was none too happy with them himself.
"I think you're done." he snarled. "I just cleaned this place up and now you've-
The bell above the door chimed, heralding a new arrival.
He rounded on with a snarl. "We're closed!
In the same moment, someone spoke.
"I'd like a full magazine of dust, please."
"Oi! I just said we were...!" Naruto looked up, and froze. "I already heard ya Blake...wait."
Now that he looked at Blake, really looked at her without anyone in the way, he noticed something. She looked just like Kali had when she was younger. Paler perhaps, without an impish gleam in her eye but...No. No, there was just no bloody way. He had all of half a second to see a shock of blond hair behind her before the door opened again as Weiss charged in behind her.
"Kali?"
"Excuse me?" young Belladona frowned and the image in his mind's eye shattered at once. "Why do you know my mother's name?"
She saw Willow danging from his fist. Froze, looked like she'd bitten into a lemon. "Mother? What's the meaning of this?!"
Willow offered a demure smile. "Hello, dear. You really do have impeccable timing."
Ruby poked her head around Weiss with a happy chirrup.
"Sooo? Do I have the best timing or what?"
Everyone exhaled as one.
"Ruby, why...?"
A/N: RUBY WHY YOU DO THIS?!
As ever, the "Embers" rule remains in effect for now.
If folks don't like this, POOF! Away it goes. Deleted! Reviews are the fire that keeps me writing. Without them, I cannot put pen to paper. Simple as that. Every bit of feedback matters, large or small~! Your voice matters! Speak up! I repeat, every bit of feedback matters...even if people think it doesn't. And there we have it.
And yes, I might write a story with Naruto as the author for "Ninja's of Love" one of these days, if only for the sheer hilarity of it.
Bit of a gentle chapter...though the next one won't be. Now, then:
So in the immortal words of Atlas...
...Review, Would you Kindly?
Here, have a preview!
(Preview)
Cinder poked her head around the corner. "Is that monster gone?"
Naruto tutted softly "Don't call Summer that. She's trying to be a good grandmother.
"She is not my grandmother.
"Tell that to her!"
...what do you want, Tyrian?"
"How cruel!" the grinning Faunus vaulted down from the rafters and landed behind him. "Can I not check in on an old friend?"
"Don't be so cold!" an arm looped around his shoulder, drawing him close." We used to wreak such havoc together, you and I!" he swung an arm up toward the ceiling with a grandiose laugh. "And now look at you!"
Kurama snorted. "Those were the days."
Naruto shook himself free and glared at him. "Those days are done."
"Are they?" Tyrian called at his back. "I hear a certain candlewick has you rather hot under the collar.
...Torchwick." he corrected, then realized he'd jumped on it. "What do you know?"
"Now, now, my knowledge comes with a price...
He was making a deal with the devil. He just knew it. "Name it."
"These children of yours," his old partner rubbed his hand together, "I'd like to meet them. I've never been an uncle."
Naruto pinched his nose, feeling a migraine coming on. "Tyrian, no. Out of the question.
"Tyrian, yes! If they're anything like you, we'll get along swimmingly!
"They're not killers. Not like us."
He tittered. "Nothing a little push can't solve-ow! Not the tail!"
"Are...are we all related?! HOW?!"
Ruby toppled back onto the bed, legs kicking gleefully. "Sweet~!"
Salem sighed. "I'm surrounded by idiots...
EDIT: Well, you made it! Hope you enjoyed the previews! By all means, tell me what you think! Looking forward to chatting with you~!
R&R~!