Soleil

4. ARE YOU OKAY

Edward caught up to Jessica and Bella as they walked from their Spanish class to the cafeteria for the lunch period. Jealousy spiked in Bella to her own surprise as Edward and Jessica talked animatedly about the snow fight as they got in line to buy food. Despite herself, Bella glanced towards the table reserved for the Cullens. She froze where she stood. There were five people at the table today. Mike was back.

Jessica pulled on Bella's arm.

"Hello? Bella? What do you want?"

Bella looked down, revolted by her self-conscious state.

"What's wrong with Bella?" Edward asked Jessica. The genuine concern for once in his voice awakened Bella from her stupor.

"Nothing," she mumbled. It had not mattered to her anymore. Her focus was back on fake-nice Edward. "I'll just get a soda today." Bella was disappointed she had the audacity to skip lunch. Her appetite was not lost.

"Aren't you hungry?" Jessica asked.

"Actually, I feel a little sick," she lied despite herself. She wanted to go back to the beginning of the line and grab the burger she missed earlier because of stupid Mike's unexpected return. The sickness did turn real, though it was an internalized feeling towards her own actions and what little control she realized she had on her own life.

She waited for them to get their food, devouring each of their food trays with her eyes. She sipped her soda like a sucker, hoping it would alleviate the hunger starting to rumble in her stomach. Twice Edward asked, with 'sincerity', how Bella was feeling. Bella had hoped for each of her responses, replying it was nothing, he would read between the lines and offer her at least the darn apple from his tray. Or the bag of fritos he was halfway through chowing down on. As he munched on his food…it seemed off. Bella noted he thoroughly enjoyed each item on his food tray, a little too much for a school provided lunch. Tired of waiting for an invitation, she nabbed the red apple from the right corner of his plastic tray.

His mouth parted open in offense, but no reprimand or objection was voiced. Bella thus flaunted the apple in front of his face before licking it and taking a bite. A wicked smile enveloped her face between each bite as she savored her lunch.

"Bella, what are you staring at?" Jessica intruded on Bella's love affair with the crispy red apple half-way devoured. Bella wanted to return her question by stating the obvious, an apple.

Her voice box was in the off position and she rolled her eyes, waiting on whoever had the next speaking part. Or that is how she imagined the world around her went. At this point, she was succumbing to her craziness. Fighting it would just make her appear crazier.

"Mike Cullen is staring at you."

"He doesn't look angry, does he?" Bella cringed as she couldn't help but ask.

"No," Jessica said, sounding confused. "Should he be?"

"I don't think he likes me," Bella confided, masking her joy.

Edward soon interrupted Bella and Jessica, and it took everything within Bella to not jump up and down to thank her savior. Bella kept silent during the rest of the conversation during lunch surrounding the upcoming snowball fight extravaganza. She was dying to say something. Anything. But instead she was left counting the little flips her stomach suffered through at her growing discomfort with Mike's return.

She wanted to walk to Biology with Edward, even despite him being a likely target for snowball snipers outside. Edward kept up a string of complaints while acting as a shield to Bella on their way to class. She only wished his shielding effort, even if it stemmed from dubious reasons, could apply to their time in Biology. Instead, dread loomed within her their entire time together.

Her dread was rewarded with Mike's presence at their shared table soon after she took her own seat.

"Hello," said a quiet, musical voice. Bella did not agree with that description though. If anything, that is what Edward's voice sounded like to her. At least when he first introduced himself. Mike's was more….ordinary. Unmatching of the superior status awarded to him by the Forks High School's student body. Bella was not stunned with his speaking part, in fact, she was perturbed. His boyish face was graced with a slight smile. His eyes were careful. And Bella just did not care.

"My name is Mike Cullen," he continued, despite Bella turning away from him to face the front of the classroom. "I didn't have a chance to introduce myself last week. You must be Bella Swan."

His polite act was nauseating to Bella. She was at least used to two-faced Edward. Mike openly showed his contempt and then bothered with fake niceties? Bella was not impressed. And how she loathed herself when she stammered, "H-how do you know my name?" The stammering was the only resistance she could muster in the forced exchange.

He laughed and Bella fought off an eye role. Instead, she looked across the aisle between tables to Edward's face, keenly focused on her and Mike. He raised an eyebrow in question. Akin to when she was determined to hold her breath in demand she confront his duplicitous behavior towards her. She huffed in reply, knowing she could never share her true sentiments.

"Oh, I think-" Bella's mind tuned out Mike's response when a torn piece of lined paper was raised in the air by Edward's delicate hand. On it, the words read, "Are you okay?".

"No!" Bella cried out, tears of relief prickling the bottom line of her lashes. Was the curse broken by his acknowledgement? But then "I meant, why did you call me Bella?" poured out from her lips and she discovered that it was only a coincidence. Still, she shook her head at Edward, wondering if it even meant anything. She was sick in the head. The world was not working as it should.

Confused, Mike asked, "Do you prefer Isabella?"

And Bella was trapped in a conversation with Mike that Edward did not interrupt for a second time. Like his question and her response were a figment of her own imagination. Confirming the something is wrong with me theory of hers.