Chapter 6

Elizabeth groaned and stretched, sighing contentedly when she heard random snaps and cracks as sore muscles and joints popped back into place. She had slept deeply, despite the previous night, and it was after nights like these that she always had the hardest time getting up and going back to work.

"No problem there." Rodney grumbled inside her head. "Ten bucks says they won't let you go back to work."

"Oh, dammit, you're right." Elizabeth snapped and she sat up in bed. She knew that if it were someone else and not herself in this position, she wouldn't want them to go back to work. The probability that they would be able to concentrate on what they needed to do when they had another person inside their head was… unlikely.

Elizabeth sighed and glared at the far side of the room where Pride and Prejudice was still lying abandoned on the floor. What was she going to do while she waited for Zelenka and the others to figure this out? Reading was obviously out of the question. She doubted Rodney could sit quietly through a movie and besides, she didn't think she could spend all her time pretending to relax in front of a television screen. What was she going to do to keep herself—and Rodney—occupied? Like she had told him the previous night, who knew how long this could take? Hopefully only a few more days—hours seemed overly hopeful—and not much more.

"Oh, come on, Elizabeth. I'm not that bad." Rodney said and Elizabeth couldn't help but smile.

"I see someone's feeling better this morning." She said, noting the definite lift in spirits. "And yes, Rodney, you are that bad."

"Oh, ha ha. Tease the fitful sleeper."

"Only if you insist." Elizabeth smiled.

"Hmph," was Rodney's only reply.

"Okay, I have an idea." Elizabeth said after a moment's silence. "Why don't we—"

"No, no, no and no." Rodney said. "I am not going back to Heightmeyer's office. Dammit, Elizabeth, it's humiliating. The smartest man in the city and the most powerful woman going to a shrink every morning? Come on, Elizabeth. Can't we just… not go?"

"What are you, five?" Elizabeth asked with a raised eyebrow. "Rodney, she can't even hear you. Why are you being such a baby?"

"I'm not being a baby." Rodney mumbled. "I just don't want to go."

"God." Elizabeth groaned and threw back the covers. "Baby."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are t—ah! I am not starting this. Rodney, I'm going to take a shower and get dressed, then we're going to go see Kate whether you want to or not."

But suddenly Elizabeth knew that Heightmeyer was the farthest thing from Rodney's mind. She felt that familiar surge of panic and embarrassment and Elizabeth rolled her eyes.

"Rodney, I'm sorry, but I have to shower and change. I'm going to smell like a guys' locker room pretty soon if I don't. And you think seeing a shrink is bad…?"

"I know, I know." Rodney said, sounding utterly despondent. "Just… make it quick."

Elizabeth laughed as she hopped out of bed and walked towards the bathroom.

"Rodney, I'm taking a shower, not marching you to the gallows."

"Same thing." Rodney mumbled morosely.

Elizabeth rolled her eyes.

"Holy crap, I'll close my eyes. Better?"

Rodney mumbled something unintelligible and Elizabeth took it as a yes, whether he meant it to be or not. She didn't care if Rodney thought she could go a few days without bathing—as a woman, she just figured she was more sensitive to such things and she was already beginning to smell a bit ripe. Plus she hadn't really cleaned up after last night and the smell of stale vomit on her breath was, well, nauseating.

Elizabeth made a point of staying away from the bathroom mirror and tried not to look at herself as she stripped out of her clothes. It was awkward, trying to look everywhere but down at her body as she turned on the shower and hoped in. She squeezed her eyes shut as she quickly soaped and rinsed her hair and made a quick process of everything else. It was probably one of the shortest showers she had ever taken in her entire life, and the entire time she could feel her skin flushing with an embarrassment that was not her own.

Elizabeth hopped out of the shower and quickly threw a towel on. More often than not when it was early and she had nowhere to be in a hurry, she would simply stride across the room naked. She liked the feel of the chill air on her still-damp skin. It was refreshing in the morning, it woke her up faster and it wasn't like anyone could see—

"OH MY GOD!" Rodney shrieked in her mind. Elizabeth jumped—several inches off the ground—and nearly dropped her towel.

"What?" she cried, spinning around and looking around for something amiss. "Rodney, what is it?"

"Oh my God, I saw! I saw! Why did you have to think it? I saw! I saw you—oh, I didn't mean to! Don't hit me."

"Rodney, what on Earth are you—oh…" Elizabeth trailed off into silence when she realized what Rodney had "seen". Apparently, thoughts didn't just transmit themselves in the form of words, but in pictures as well…

Rodney was all but hyperventilating now and Elizabeth was beginning to get a bit jittery from all the emotion. It was rather strange because there was the rush of horror and embarrassment, but there was also something else there… something that felt a lot like excitement. Elizabeth almost commented on the latter, but decided not to. Rodney was a guy, after all. He couldn't very well help what he thought—at least not most of the time. Besides, it was her fault for thinking such an image. She just felt bad for poor Rodney, forced to see her walking stark naked across her living room carpet—

"God dammit, Elizabeth, STOP!" Rodney shrieked and Elizabeth winced at the reverberation inside her skull. "What are you trying to do, kill me? A man can only take so much."

"Sorry." Elizabeth said, and she really was. Rodney, for all his brashness and boorishness, was really quite a gentleman at heart. At least, that was what Elizabeth liked to believe.

"It's probably not true." Rodney pointed out sullenly. Apparently, this new line of thought was enough of a change of subject to get his blood pressure under control again because Elizabeth could finally breathe normally. "Every woman I've tried to date has ended up calling me a boar and a pig and… any number of other quaint little pet names."

Elizabeth sighed.

"Oh, Rodney, I'm sorry." She paused and raised an eyebrow. "And what about Katie Brown?"

"Who? Oh! Right… um, Katie. Yeah, well, you know, she hasn't gotten a lot of time to know me…"

"And yet you were supposed to go out on a date with her, weren't you?" Elizabeth asked calmly and she could feel Rodney's emotions flaring up again. This time, though, there was something besides the normal embarrassment. What was it? Shame? Rodney McKay, ashamed that he was going on a date? Now that definitely didn't seem right. Maybe her Rodney-emotion-radar was going a little crazy after last night's… incident.

Rodney coughed and Elizabeth could almost see him in her mind, hopping from one foot to the other and looking everywhere but at her face. It was what he did when he hit upon a particularly uncomfortable subject. But why would Katie Brown—a perfectly nice woman from what Elizabeth could tell—be an uncomfortable subject? It was about time Rodney had a love life… not that it was any of her business.

"Hmph." Rodney mumbled in her head. "No, it isn't any of your business. And why are you still in a towel? Can't you get dressed and talk at the same time?"

Elizabeth raised an eyebrow in surprise. That last question had been particularly snappish, which made Elizabeth think that Katie truly was an uncomfortable subject for Rodney to be discussing. But why on Earth—

"Just drop it, will you?" Rodney shouted. "It's not like I'm going out with her anyway. I mean, she didn't ask Elizabeth Weir to dinner."

Elizabeth was about to open her mouth to apologize, but something in Rodney's tone made her stop. She couldn't put her finger on it, but she decided to take Rodney's advice, at last, and let the matter drop. Keeping her mind purposefully blank, Elizabeth quickly dressed. She sat down on the edge of the bed to pull her shoes on and as she did so, she mused aloud—to herself and to Rodney.

"Look, I still think it's a good idea to go and talk to Kate. Maybe she can think of a way that one of us, at least, can get some work done around here. Or maybe in talking to her one of us will come up with an idea of how to reverse this whole thing. In any case, I still think we should go."

Rodney sighed.

"Fine." He mumbled churlishly. "Fine! We'll go."

Elizabeth smiled and got to her feet, pulling her jacket on as she headed for the door.

"Thank you, Rodney."

"Yeah, yeah."

"Good morning, Dr. Weir." Kate smiled as the door to her office slid open. Elizabeth smiled.

"Good morning, Kate." She said. The use of the doctor's first name, Heightmeyer knew, was to point out that this was to be an informal meeting. She nodded and the door slid closed as Elizabeth stepped in.

"And how are you… two doing this morning?"

"Better than expected, I suppose." Elizabeth said. No need to mention Rodney's nightmares. Besides, somehow she had an inkling that she already knew…

"She does not!" Rodney shouted—a little too quickly. "I don't need a shrink. I'm perfectly healthy."

Elizabeth sighed and Kate raised an eyebrow.

"Rodney?" she asked and Elizabeth nodded. Kate smiled slightly and motioned for Elizabeth to sit. "I thought so. You tend to get a mildly detached look on your face whenever he seems to be talking to you."

"I do?" Elizabeth asked at the same time as Rodney asked, "She does?"

Kate nodded.

"But tell me, what brings you here this morning? I don't know what else I can do to help you…"

"Told you!" Rodney shouted. "Now let's go get something to eat—"

"Rodney…" Elizabeth said warningly and Rodney immediately lapsed into a grumbling silence like he usually did when she used that tone. She looked at Heightmeyer and smiled apologetically. "Sorry."

"No problem." Kate said. "Now, why…?"

"Well, I was hoping that maybe last night you may have gotten some sort of incite on how to deal with this… er… situation a little better. I just realized that neither Rodney nor I are fit to return to work, so we are going to have to figure out a way to spend our time without driving each other…"

"Crazy is the word you're looking for, I think." Rodney told her grumpily. Elizabeth sighed and nodded. When Kate didn't respond, Elizabeth blushed.

"Oh. Right. Um, crazy." She said out loud. It was hard to remember that no one else could hear Rodney when his voice was so clear inside her head. Kate nodded in understanding.

"I see. I imagine that when the two most important people in Atlantis aren't allowed to go back to work, it would get a little irritating. Well…" Kate frowned a moment before brightening with a look that said she had suddenly been struck by an idea. "Why don't the two of you try experimenting?"

"Excuse me?" Rodney yelped, his voice rising to his panic-shriek. Elizabeth didn't blame him, though she managed to keep calm. She raised an eyebrow and repeated Rodney's question.

"Um… excuse me?"

"Sorry." Heightmeyer apologized. "I suppose I could have worded that better."

"Yes, you could have." Rodney snapped.

"What I meant was… there are two working minds inside your body, Elizabeth. Two separate minds. But perhaps Rodney has as much control over your body as you do. Have you tried to see?"

"I don't like where this is going…" Rodney said glumly. Elizabeth raised an eyebrow.

"You mean, have we tried to see if Rodney can take over my mind?"

"No. That's not what I meant at all." Kate was quick to reassure. "What I meant was… well, Rodney may be trapped inside your mind for a while. If he has equal control over your body… well, for example, maybe he would be able to eat citrus. You're not allergic to it. Things like that. I know this is also going to sound wrong, but you should play. Have fun. Make this a good thing, not a challenge. Understand?"

Elizabeth was nodding—she liked the idea. It would defiantly give them something to distract each other with. But Rodney did not seem at all pleased with the idea.

"No! Elizabeth, no. This is a bad, bad, bad idea."

"Oh, come on, Rodney. What's the worst that could happen?"

"Elizabeth, you aren't a robot that you can just download a subconscious into! You are a human being, a person. I'm not going to take over your body. It's too "The Body Snatchers" for me. Besides, I wouldn't want to… hurt you."

Elizabeth raised an eyebrow. She had never heard him talk like this with anyone. Nor had she heard him ever balk so much. Normally, in a situation like this, she would have expected Rodney to be the first one to come up with this idea—

Elizabeth's eyes flew open with sudden realization.

"Rodney! You knew about this, didn't you?"

"Well, I didn't know." Rodney said slowly. "But I… figured."

"Well, then let's try it!"

"Why are you so excited about this?" Rodney asked. "I'd be taking over your body. Don't you know what that means? You'd have no control! I could do whatever I want… not that I would, of course."

"Of course." Elizabeth said gently. "Rodney, I trust you. I know you won't hurt me. Please? Just as a distraction, if nothing else. You're the scientist, after all. How can you pass up a chance like this?"

"Easier than you'd think." Rodney grumbled. "Fine. But I'm telling you right now—you made me do it. Remember that."

"I will, Rodney." Elizabeth said softly and smiled. "I promise."

Rodney sighed and took a deep breath, as if preparing to jump of the high-dive.

"Okay… here we go."