Chapter 30

Great Expectations

Emma Nelson made the walk to the next table, Sean sipped her drink and then went back to his Sprite, it was too strong. He needed a drink though but he wasn't sure just how expensive they could be. Perhaps it would help him sleep better. She couldn't help but wonder how he saw her before she saw him. Perhaps he and Darcy had been at the bar before they drank. The rules with Darcy's house was Spinner couldn't drink or do drugs in the household, but outside as long as he kept drinks to the minimum he was fine. He seemed to be happy. She accidentally though, managed to interrupt a tender moment between the pair as she came to their table offering her congratulations and kind words.

She knew that they ended up as amicable as possible considering the obvious, but she didn't think she'd see him again. A feeling of nerves waved over her as she coughed subtly to make her presence known, "Spinner."

Spinner let go of Darcy's hand, and pulled Emma into a hug, he lingered there for a second before pulling away. He smelled the same, even while being in the presence of his new girlfriend. She offered him an awkward closed-mouth smile, "Hello, didn't expect to see you here. Where have you been?"

"Around." He answered, "Here, there, nowhere and then Darcy found me."

"You were homeless?" Emma asked quietly narrowing her eyes, her stomach pained her a bit, but still not to attract attention to them she kept the question quiet.

"Yes." He answered, softly after a pause, he then added, "I went through a rough patch. I got into alcohol and things but that's over now and I'm clean now," He lifted his glass, "But not completely sober it's a special occasion. It's not everyday I could take my girl out for a nice dinner. I got a job with her father, I'm for his law firm."

"I knew you were good at things." Emma beamed with sincerity, "I'm really happy for you."

"I just wanted to extend a friendly wink, that uh it seems everyone is where they have to be." Spinner mentioned kindly.

Emma was charmed by that, it was true after everything it was nice to know that on both sides both people can come to an agreement that all was fine. Emma didn't hate Spinner, she hated some of the things he did and Spinner didn't hate Emma, he simply wasn't ready to let go of his issues and apprehension about trust. Now Spinner sees he has to trust or he would be in some sort of rut where he'd be constantly unhappy if he didn't let down his walls just once. Ultimately with the timing of their short lived marriage, they have reached this level of calm. When she first walked up was this drink a trick and he still harbored contempt. He glanced over at her table, when standing he could see Sean sitting there, twiddling his thumbs waiting for Emma or the waiter to come back around.

Spinner glanced back to Emma's table and then back to Emma, "So you're with him now, huh?"

"Yep." Emma replied, unable to contain with Sean on her mind, "You two should all meet. In fact when he first came by he was asking for you."

"Does he know?" He asked quietly.

Emma nodded, "I felt like it was right to tell him. What's done is done, it's good to talk about things. Evidently it was something we never really did together. Which is why I think things got the way they were." She sighed, "I am sorry about how things ended up, I didn't mean to hurt you. We couldn't stay. I'm glad things look up for you though. It's all we could really ask for."

"I don't know how we got by for what? The first six months felt like cake and then we fell apart."

"We did try." Emma offered, "We really did do our best, we were so young."

"Yes we did, I'm happy for you. You seem much happier." Spinner remarked looking at her, she looked more positive and radiant her skin the color was infused into them and she just appeared calm and happy. When they were together by the end she was severely run down, pale and depressed and here she was the vibrant girl he married but never really knew. He never was able to get inside of her head, understand her and her strange tastes in food, film, hobbies and more. There is such a thing as been so opposite that they cannot see eye to eye at all. That was them, daily arguments, slammed doors, nights going to bed angry, nights on the couch and lastly him leaving. Perhaps he simply wasn't the guy for her, they believe that and it was true. They wanted to make it work, he would come home with flowers, she'd get him his favorite spray cheese but then they'd find another thing wrong when all the while it was them. They were wrong because Emma was deep down repressing her feelings for Sean claiming that would never be considering their distance and Spinner wanting it to work, and not blow up in his face like it did with Jane.

"So do you."

"I am, I'm also going to be a father."

"Wow, congrats!" Emma's eyes opened wide, "I didn't want to be rude, but I can tell. How far along?"

"Three months." He beamed proudly.

"Ah, you don't know the sex yet?"

"We're hoping for a healthy one, that's all we got."

Emma laughed nodding, "So I guess come by our table to see Sean if you'd like and I'll see you later."

"Will do." Spinner said turning around to sit in his chair. Emma looked to Darcy, "Congratulations are definitely in order."

"For you two as well." Darcy replied, looking to Emma's promise ring.

Emma impulsively touched her ring and admired it, "It's a promise ring, we're taking things slow. It's a good pace for now." She looked back at Sean and then back to Spinner and Darcy, "See you guys. It was honestly, really nice to see you. What a small world, huh?"

"Likewise." Spinner remarked as the waiter came by with their tray of food, and Emma turned back to her respective table with Sean and the life she always wanted with the person she always wanted.

"Goodbye Emma!" Darcy called.

Emma readjusted the napkin on her lap as their bread as she sat back down at the table for two. Sean finished buttering her a few pieces of the bread and put it on her plate, "He said the appetizers will be out shortly."

"Thanks." Emma replied tearing off a piece of the bread and tasting it, "So, they were really nice."

"Well, that's good." Sean answered before tearing a piece off of his piece of fresh hot and soft bread, "Tell him I said hi?"

"Well actually, I invited them to come by our table when they were finished so he could say hi in person."

"So he's cool with me?" Sean asked curiously and a bit nervous.

"He didn't give me any reason not to be. He seemed genuinely happy for me and for you. It honestly went a lot better than I expected."

"Well that's a relief, because the last thing I'd want is for him to be upset with me, we were friends at one point and time."

"It's just one unsettling thing is, he was homeless for a bit before he hooked up with Darcy."

"Wow, how did he manage?"

Emma shrugged, "It came up he didn't go into detail. I guess he wasn't actually missing after all. I knew he wouldn't just skip town. He doesn't know about anywhere but here. He grew up here and never left."

"I think that's why you married him. You knew he wouldn't leave." Sean answered honestly, causing Emma to get uncomfortable, namely because he called her bluff. It was the truth, "You just didn't expect him to have the kind of baggage he had, with the girl who cheated on him, so he made things difficult with his distrust. You both got fed up and that's how I see it."

"I see it that way too." Emma nodded, "I got married for the wrong reasons, absolutely. Spinner and I were born to fail."

. . .

Manny was lying down on the bed looking at the window in the dark on her stomach. Jay could no longer sleep and went to the bathroom he walked in slowly and quietly. He wasn't sure if she was asleep or simply still. He grabbed the afghan off of the chair and draped it over her while looking down at her, he whispered softly before he shut out the hall light and the door, "I'm sorry."

Then he fell back onto the bed, and turned on his side. He simply just couldn't go to bed mad at her. In fact, he wasn't even mad he just wanted to work things out. He just wanted things to go back to how they used to be before the holidays. He wants Manny back, and he doesn't understand why she's so cold, distant and upset. Fortunately for them, the paparazzi has gotten the hint that Manny wants nothing to do with them and everything to do with her privacy. The next morning, would be her first day on set and it'd be an understatement that she's nervous, but more or less she's nervous about the rumors and the possible media coverage that may center around her life. She turned on her side, "Apology accepted. I might admit that . . it's not easy loving me."

"You think?" Jay asked, but he shook his head observing her by the window still facing her, she hadn't moved much, she was still on her stomach. It was dark in there, the only light they had been whatever the moon could shed. "It was easy, totally easy."

"I'm impulsive, difficult, I flip out over the tiniest little things and yet you chased me all the way out here." Manny confessed, "My worst qualities are why I'm pretty much kryptonite. And I rarely do what I'm told."

"Maybe I'm the one who needs to make the changes." He pulled her closer.

Manny wasn't ready to buy what he's selling responding, "You're perfect."

"So you don't hate me?"

"You tried to kiss my best friend when you were drunk." Manny mentioned shaking her head, "I guess I can't be too upset, we were fighting anyway. Why do I sabotage everything? Why am I so goddamn sensitive? I was only successfully pushing you away, only to realize I didn't want you gone, I couldn't stand to see you go."

"Yeah, but I shouldn't have. I mean she forgave me she knew I was having a moment." Jay replied shrugging "Maybe you're not the only impulsive one. I had to tell you so that everything was on the table."

"We all were having a moment." Manny replied calmly, letting out a yawn, "That Christmas break everyone's lives were changing, our lives were changing and it was the truthfully last thing on our minds. I always thought myself as the girl who had it all figured out, had a plan, was doing what I love to do but being so far from everyone is so tough. There's only so much a phone call can bring, only so much warmth, never enough. The feeling of your arms around me, never wanting to let me go. Hearing about things after the fact that they happened and only hearing the tail end of something. Being treated like I'm not good enough for you by your best friend. Emma being too preoccupied with Sean to see my life is a mess and I still find a way to make things worse for myself. No one ever had it figured out, least of all me and yet people depend on me. It's exhausting to be the one people depend on for a laugh, for a . . pep talk for everything. I hate being called selfish when I do for once do something for just me."

"I might look like it, but I don't have a clue. I don't know if I should've done better in school, finished all together or I'm just not ready to be an adult."

"You didn't complete school?" Manny asked inquiringly changing the subject.

"When you bully a person to death, you get expelled."

Manny thought for a moment, "What?"

"Alex, Spinner and I thought it'd be a wonderful idea to fuck with Rick's head." Jay confessed, taking a deep breath, yawning himself, "And then he brought a gun to school and rest is history."

"The paint and feathers incident, that was you?!" Manny jumped up in surprise, "How did you guys finagle that?"

"Alex was vice president that year, she had access to keys of all the classrooms. I pretty much have had sex in every classroom before I got expelled from there."

"Too much information." She rolled her eyes, "I mean I always assumed . . . I mean the rumors. Sorry but, you asked and then I thought of that and I-" She scowled, "I'm sorry."

"I guarantee in high school you wouldn't not all would you have like me very much." Jay acknowledged with a wink, "No one really did."

"Did you like me? When you saw me around?"

"Like you? I used to watch your spirit squad practices through the glass when I'd wait for Lexxi to get out of meetings or whatever. I knew I never had a real shot. When you'd get propelled into the air, flip like you were flying and land impossible stunts. I never thought in a million years you'd be in my life quite like this. I thought eventually Alex and I would get back together, and then I met you and everyone else is sub par and I'm not worried about the realty of Alex and I never could we really be together. Emma bringing you into the garage changed me forever."

"I feel like I had my mind made up about you a long time ago, that you were this bad guy." Manny started, "But you're not, you're . . actually the best guy I ever had in my life. You'd rather die than see me upset, and honestly no other guy was ever this attentive to my feelings. I thought I'd scare you away and when you didn't I didn't understand why you hadn't hurt me yet. And I want to keep you here but I don't want you to turn your back on your life back there. It's just so hard not seeing you which is why I think I . . I was lonely. I may have a house full of nice things that I paid for on my dime and people work for me but they're not friends, they're not family. Just not you, you understand?"

"You don't want to be apart." He blurted before adding, "And neither do I. So do you propose we do? Make the most of our time?"

"I thought being an actress would end the loneliness but when I'm here I'm always alone. I'm always happiest at home, but that has a lot to do with you. Not necessarily being homesick, but homesick for one person." Manny started to say, scooting up, and pulling him closer. Manny and Jay laid on the bed with the down pillows and warm comforter, "I thought it was my dream come true but maybe I should . . I've thought for a while I take some time off. No obligation to come back but if I want to I could."

"You just had a two month vacation. What about the pilot?"

"I could drop out." She shrugged, "Even if I don't want to, but if it means giving our relationship a serious take, not that we were never serious it's just we were always having problems because of me being out here."

"It could end your career." Jay answered, shaking his head, "I can't ask you do to that."

"I'm not asking." She laughed, shaking her head, "I'm saying, me."

"And go back home?" Jay sighed, "Are you sure?"

"Absolutely." She whispered, shrugging, "Maybe we could move out here, that's the alternative but I just don't want to be apart anymore."

"I'll tell you what, I will move out here. Only if Alex can come along too."

"Of course, there's plenty of room here." Manny beamed, her dimples showing, "No one has ever . . put their life on the line for me before. It just has to be what you want."

Jay paused, pursing his lips giving it a second of a thought but he knew this was what he wanted. He too was tired of being away from Manny, it would only strengthen their relationship to be together on a regular basis, and he wouldn't be alone while Manny was at work because he would be able to spend time with Alex. Alex can get a fresh start, he can make a new start. It was a win, win and win situation. It was good and although it'd be hard to say goodbye to Emma and Sean for an extended period he knew it was the right thing. Besides everyone is growing up, falling in love and looking into getting married or at least settling down. Perhaps this was the change he had been looking for, he couldn't take LA away from Manny, it was her goal she's there and established just like he hoped she'd be. Staying in LA could be good for Jay yet, he could look for work with area shops or even open up a place on his own. Keep the dream alive that Sean wanted to achieve, build a custom garage make money doing what he loved to do. It's not like Emma and Sean couldn't come to visit, it would just be better for their relationship for them to live together and that's where their heart is, where Manny is Jay feels the most at home. It didn't matter where home was, it was just with her.

As Jay hugged Manny to his chest, feeling a weight lifted, feeling brand new he just knew this was the right decision. He felt safe in that decision, Manny didn't judge him when he told her his part in the shooting that haunted him for years. That perhaps initially she felt like Jay was a scummy guy, but that wasn't who he was revealed to be years later. Perhaps sometimes the person you really are meant for isn't the person you first fell in love with. Perhaps Jay believes Manny did hold a torch to her unrequited romance with Craig but that didn't mean she loved Jay any less. Sometimes you just have to find out who you aren't meant for, to find out who you are. Love will keep them together, being close in proximity keeps them grounded and at their best and they couldn't be more excited about the future.

Jay pulled away, unable to wipe the smile off of his face, "I have to call Alex."

"Do it to it." Manny answered, not moving from the comfort of the bed.

He took out his cell phone and slid down off of the bed, hearing the ring of the phone as Alex picked up from the house, no answer, straight to the answering machine. He hung up the phone and looked back at Manny, and then it dawned on him, "No answer."

"She might be with Emma and Sean." Manny offered sympathetically, "Maybe she's asleep."

"No." He tiredly remarked, "I just feel like a bad feeling about that she usually doesn't go anywhere."

"What are you thinking then?" Manny asked worriedly, "I would hope everything is just fine, but you know her better than me."

"I have to call Emma and Sean to find out." Jay managed frantically cupping his head in his hands.

"Wait! Before you do that," Manny sighed, "Earlier I saw Sean posted on Facebook that he's having a date night with Emma."

"Oh, yeah. I wouldn't want to interrupt. They of all people would know where she'd be, they're in town." However, Jay once again called Alex, and the same thing happened phone rung for a while and then went straight to the answering machine. Suddenly a really bad feeling washed over him, what if she's back on the wagon with drugs? He hadn't exactly been supportive of her in her sobriety or paying much attention given the whole debacle. He turned to Manny in horror, "What if she's back on the drugs? And she's alone so no one is telling her no. I am a shitty friend."

"You and I both know that's true, and besides it shouldn't be your fault. It's not easy for her either. I feel guilty about this as much as you do. She must think I don't think much of her either when I left as soon as she moved in and then you follow me out there, we all did a shit job. Let's take it one step at a time though, calm down."

"I could never forgive myself if that's the truth."

Manny shrugged uncomfortably, "I guess you could be right, it's possible which is why I think the move could be good for her too."

"Aren't drugs everywhere here?"

"Drugs are everywhere, let's be real for a second. She at least knows where to go at home. But here? She won't have any connects."

"Didn't think about that." Jay admitted, letting out a sigh, "I just hope she calls back."

Jay gave up after a few minutes of silence, and called once more and left a message, "Lexxi, it's Jay just touching base. It's around 12:30 afternoon my time so if you're out give me a call when you get back in. Love you." After he hung up he put his phone back on the bedside table and re positioned himself back into the bed with Manny with a mind riddled in thought.