Authors Note - I know, I know it's been a long time. I wanted to take this time to thank everyone for their kind words and reviews. A lot has gone on since my last update and I wanted to let everyone know I didn't forget this story. So with that, enjoy the next chapter and hopefully there won't be a year and some change since the next update. Keep the reviews coming, thanks for everything I'm super flattered.

Chapter 31

My Best friend

Lonely Alex stared at the phone ringing but she didn't answer it. How could she? Not when she was faced with two vials of cocaine and a mirror but she choked and didn't snort it. She just stared them, to answer or to not answer but to do drugs but to not do drugs. She was at a crossroads with a catch 22. She was scared. She didn't want to succumb to her addiction but she didn't want to be alone either. Jay was with Manny, Emma with Sean everyone was paired up and off doing their own stuff and she wanted that too but she was alone. She hated being alone especially now because that's when the loneliness hits and that's when most of all she wants a fix. She finally picked up the phone and dials Jay back as mascara slids down her cheeks in tears, she tries to disguise her sadness by swallowing, finally he answers.

"Alex! I've been trying to reach you." He asked, "Is everything okay? Why didn't you pick up?"

"Jay I'm scared." She felt herself reduced to a child like they used to be like old times when they were only children, when they'd look out for one another, when she loved him and he loved her. A time that feels like a lifetime away. It's when Alex realized she needs Jay. It was that familiar tone she took, when she used to fear her mothers deadbeat boyfriend Chad. This time it was different.

Flashback to the warm nights of the summer of '97. It was raining and Jay comforted Alex for most of the summer between her parents arguing and eventually splitting up. Alex was then faced with the unfortunate reality that they were to be moving to a new school and new friends. She just wanted Jay though, he was her best friend and he could never be replaced. They met at their spot, the spot they'd both meet at when things got to be too much at home and elsewhere.

He remembered that all-too-familiar tone in her voice, when she didn't want to admit she can't take care of whatever was going on alone, "What's going on, Lex?"

"I need you here, I-I don't want to be alone right now."

He sighed, because he knew that there was clearly more to the story, "Is Sean home?"

She shook her head, "He's out with Emma, I thought I could handle being home alone but . . . I guess it all became too real."

"Try to breathe, I'm going to try and catch a flight then."

"Hurry, please."

"I will, I just have to tell Manny now."

He emerged from the other room and Manny pulled him close from the edge of the bed, "Is she alright?"

"I think she's getting temptation."

"I've had to deal with this with friends . . . a friend in the past." Not wanting to answer a name, "She's brave you know, for calling you."

"Lexxi has always been so brave. So you're okay with me leaving tonight?"

"I wish I were okay with it," Manny started to say, "however I understand that she needs you and it seems like an emergency and besides I know you'll be back. I love you."

"And I love you." He leaned down to kiss her and then he walked out the front door. Manny threw herself back onto the bed and sighed, she didn't think her time with Jay would end so soon. She also knew that she told him he could go but she didn't think he'd actually go but life goes on for her and she's strong enough to deal with the loneliness but little does she know it might come back sooner than she thinks.

- x - x -

Jay Hogart walked through the door of his house to find Alex on the couch asleep in the fetal position all scrunched up in a ball, he observed that she had held up her end of the bargain and she didn't do what she feared she would with the evidence on the table.

He decided to plop himself down on the couch carefully so he wouldn't wake her and turned on the tv. He was bombarded with reports about his fiance. He turned off the tv immediately and Alex began to stir in her sleep and eventually jerked herself awake. She sits up and pulls him into a hug, in his chest she tiredly stated, "I'm sorry I ruined your weekend."

"You're sorry?" He pulled back in question, shaking his head, "No, I should've known leaving you here would've been a bad idea knowing about your drug problem. I should be. I was so wrapped up with Manny and the whole Craig thing that I wasn't paying much attention to you."

"It doesn't matter, you're here now." Alex beamed, "and I resisted temptation."

"Have you uh- ever considered counceling?" He pointed out curiously.

"Jay . . . you know I don't have the money for it."

"I think it could help you. Think of everything you went through when we were kids, sure it probably left some scars."

Her eyes widened, "You'd do that for me?"

"Lexxi you know I'd do anything for you to be okay. Even if it doesn't work."

Alex addressed him, "Thanks for the concern. If it'll help, I'll do it I just don't want to take your money."

"I don't look at it like that, I just I don't know; think of it as an investment in your future."

"You're the best friend in the world, but I'm sure you knew that already." Alex declared aloud as she mentally warmed up to the idea.

Her life is living proof she needs therapy, especially after the traumatic few years of being out on her own.

"You just need to relax, you are safe now." He reluctantly ran his fingers through her raven locks, she for the first time looked up

into his eyes but shook her head, he snapped out of it as soon as it started. He repeated, "You're safe now."

She side-stepped the obvious, "Okay. It's a deal. I'll go to therapy and I'll get a job too to take ."

"I love you, Lex."

"I know." She replied, "but we're not seventeen anymore."

Alex sat up onto the couch, and he continued to sit beside her. He pulled his cigarettes out of his pocket and offered her one which she took.

He lit her smoke, and she inhaled blowing some smoke, "So how's Manny?"

"She's doing alright." He beamed, "we're back together you know?"

"Oh I know it." She stuck her tongue out, "I know you better than anyone in the world."

"Oh not what you think." Jay shook his head, "I'm not seventeen anymore."

"So you hadn't seen her and you guys didn't bump some uglies?"

"We talked things out like adults."

"So I guess next time."

He took her by surprise when he proposed, "Come to LA with Manny and I. I don't want to live bicoastally."

She asked in surprise, "Really now?"

"Uh yeah. You can work, go therapy there and live with us. Manny said she'd love to have you. C'mon, please?"

"Are you sure?"

"Sure as we'll ever be."

"When do we move?"

"Whenever we want. Preferbly as soon as humanly possible."

"Alright, we'll go."

"Yes!" He exclaimed joyously.