Author Note - - SO you know I read reviews on this fic and I noticed some questions - first being Emma has two dogs. Just sayin' she has a Pomeranian and another small dog with Sean. J I just wanted to clear up confusion. Also, Sean lives with Emma now. He was living at Jay's while Sean and Emma were kinda separated and fighting. Tracker still lives at Jay's house in Degrassi but will eventually (VERY SOON) get his own place. He works at Tony's Garage, which Sean is temporarily managing and also working at. I already cleared up the Sean/Jay/Emma debacle that happened at Zanzibar when Jay kissed Emma. Sean was more pissed at Jay ,(considering he initiated the kiss and Emma DID NOT KISS BACK BTW) BUT he got over it. Also Spinner doesn't know Darcy cheated on him with Craig that's true. As Manny said in Standing in the Dark even if it's wrong girls are entitled to a secret and that's hers. Darcy feels remorseful. She and Spinner are currently working on their relationship. And one more throwaway detail – Clare and her cancer yes she has cancer but a year had gone by in the story and she's doing much better but Clare isn't really that important to this story. Katie Matlin works at The Dot while she's home from college break. Fitz also works The Dot but like I said he's just kinda there~. I tried to bring in chars from later seasons in the story but they are pretty much just there for continuity purposes as in they're not gonna have a story. Peter alternates his time in Degrassi and Regina but he's not a huge role in this story. In fact I hate him so like I don't care to even give him any development. The year in the timeline is approximately late 2013-2014. The beginning is early-December 2013. I made an error in a chapter that Tracker moved to Ajax in season 3 I confused the location * forgive me for being from America and being a shitty writer * – he actually moved to Alberta. I know, I know I try my best to like be correct.

Just wanted to clear those things up. Thanks for reading. I love reviews and I'd like to finally get to the story. So without further commentary I shall begin.

Love always, Brimi xo

…

Chapter 52

All Apologies

In the days Emma was in town and with her guidance Manny went to the police and decided to get a restraining order against Craig so he could no longer contact her. It was private. It wasn't publicized only she, Emma, Craig and the proper authorities know about it. She also got one against the cab driver from the airport while she was there just in case.

Emma stayed as long as she could in LA at Manny and Jay's. Sean went home about a week later to work at Tony's and Emma eventually went back to work at The Dot. While Emma was in town, they went to the beach, sight seeing, had drinks at funky bars and spent some girl time together to make Manny feel better but eventually she had to go on home to Degrassi. Manny had fun, but deep down she still felt frightened constantly looking over her shoulder. Her new psychiatrist prescribed her some anti-anxiety medications but she hasn't given them enough time to work and she's still on edge. She even shelled out big bucks to beef up her security detail and kept a low profile. Manny still had to work; even on set she was on edge and on guard. She didn't socialize and she wasn't herself when the cameras were off she simply hid out in her trailer away from the cast and crew.

Elsewhere in another area, Craig knew that Manny gave him an out and never spoke of what happened at the premiere. The very next day he decided to visit Joey and Angela. It was there at Joey's house that they got a knock on the door and was served with the paperwork. He was highly embarrassed because Joey and Angela didn't know he was in Toronto for almost a year and basically stalking and harassing Manny. It wasn't Craig who got the papers, it was Angela and she opened them and told her father immediately. He wasn't happy.

Joey gave him the manila envelope and sighed. As Craig read everything thoroughly he wasn't even mad he accepted fault. Joey had to lay down the law if he was planning to be there to stay, "You have to stay away from her, now she's made it radically clear," Joey relented despite the fact his heart laid with Manny even if she didn't want anything to do with him. Joey had no idea about how deep Craig's feelings ran for Manny aside from they went on a few dates in junior high and dated in high school but he never knew much about their history. He put his touring on hold and like Manny kept a low profile. "Only thing I want to ask is why?"

He hesitated and then mumbled not making eye contact still holding the envelope in his hands, "I-I don't want to talk about it." He needed to speak up.

"You don't have to go into detail but I'm just concerned."

"It's a long story, Joey." Craig sighed sadly.

"I know I'm not your mother or even your father but could you give me some insight?"

"Joey," He started to say sadly. Even though Craig lived with Joey was a father figure and Joey tried his best to be a good father figure in his life after the loss of his parents and after Albert's abuse they never really discussed things about how Craig sees him. Joey really cares about Craig and tends to feel guilty or even like he's failed him despite his best efforts. "I see you as. . . fuck it you are my father. You've shown me what it's like to have a father and I don't deserve it. I-Iuh . .. anyway I always wanted to thank you for everything even know. As for Manny I loved her more than anyone. I realized it too late. She moved on with her life and I wanted to be with her. I've ruined everything. I just wanna die." He hides his face with shame nearing tears, "I didn't think it'd get this bad."

Angela is now much older and understanding than she was as a child, that's pretty obvious. She was listening from the cook of the door, it was her who retrieved the notice from the mail she read it but Joey was the one who decided to speak on it. "Did you like stop taking your medication?"

Angela looked more like Craig's mother every day. He hated that he was setting a bad example for his sister who he loved. He didn't care that she asked he'd be lying if he told her he had continued but instead he had fallen off the path of recovery.

"Ang . . ." Joey closed his eyes with exasperation knowing from experience that Craig absolutely hates that question.

"No no, Joey it's okay. Angela come here." The curly haired girl nodded and sat across from Craig on the couch. Joey was almost afraid to admit that Joey had violent tendencies but his heart was usually in the right place.

Angela was in her mid-teens about the same age that Craig was when he was cheating on Ashley with Manny. Joey is fortunate that Angela is a good kid and always was. Craig grimaced and then whispered quietly, "I need to be more honest."

"Please Craig, don't be mad." Angela pled with him, "me and dad are just concerned."

"When I was fourteen, I was really stupid." Craig started out thoughtfully.

"Well duh." Angela remarked shaking her head lightening the situation, "but you weren't. You were young."

Angela was mature beyond her years. Growing up without a mother and growing up with Craig was complicated. She witnessed Craig violently standing over Joey and the blows with his fists. She remembered Caitlin holding her trying to shield her eyes as they screamed at them or when Craig ran away.

"I didn't realize the gravity of the situation. Manny was all in. She really was the one for me and I squandered it. And then I tried to make things right the best way I could. I just didn't realize how big her feelings were until they were gone. I took her for granted. I made a lot of mistakes, I even told her to her face she was a big mistake once because . . . lets just say we did it really young and – we, I didn't take it well when she got um pregnant and then she got rid of it – her and then we got back together years later and I didn't handle it right I just peaced for university in Vancouver. And then I had her you know still and we'd do the long distance thing and then I was stupid I chose my addiction over her and I let her go and she flew away and flourished and I so didn't deserve her affections. I never did. And then this time around I almost had her, I was all in and now I know exactly how she felt. Every time I'd . . go away or choose Ashley or whatever I did to hurt her. She said it hurt too much; we'd been through too much. We couldn't work. She had already in her heart let me go. Do I blame her now? Not at all. I still love her I have nothing but love for that girl. Yeah sure, I was angry. I was hurt. I promise you never meant to hurt her. I just wanted to die. I want to die. So I had to get her alone, one last ditch effort to make her see and she stuck to her guns and she refused to but she was killing me," Craig mused on, leaning a little closer to Angela with a saddened expression on his face affectionately, "so I'm telling this for a reason Ang if there's ever someone who'd do anything for you don't please please whatever you do don't make the same mistakes I did. Remember what I tell you. I should've chosen her every day, every time. It'll be the biggest regret of my life. Trust me, it is the biggest regret of my life."

"That's a lot to process. She was pregnant with your baby? When did this happen?!" Angela gasped and begged for answers, Joey was surprised but silently listened evaluating Craig with his eyes, "What exactly happened when you got her alone? Did you rape her? "

"No nothing like that, I didn't hurt her honest!" Craig protested, "I just I basically tried to you know let her know how I felt for the umpteenth time. I wanted her to listen and hear me out. I tried to win her over but I realize it was far too late. I just couldn't live without her. I wasn't nice though, I was forceful. I was mean. I hadn't been sleeping in weeks. I'd been drinking and yes Angela, I went off my medication that was probably the first thing that I was making this weird decent into madness. I thought if she just . . . killed me it would make everything right I gave her a gun and I begged her." He looked down with shame and heartbreak his eyes welling up with tears his eyes were red from tearing up and being stressed out about the potential consequences of what he had done, "I'd never hurt you guys intentionally. I'd never hurt her intentionally I'm sorry I've messed up. I need help. I need family. You guys are all I have."

"Why didn't you tell us this before?" Joey asked sternly, "we could've been more supportive."

"I know. I'm sorry." Joey pulled Craig into a hug. Angela slowly got up off the chair and hugged Craig and her father as they just spent the rest of the day as a family.

"Are you going to jail?" Angela quaked with concern again as they broke from the group hug.

"No. They just said I couldn't be near her. It's a warning." Craig remarked matter of factly with flat sadness to his voice.

"What is your plan?" Joey wondered aloud with a lot of fatherly seriousness to him.

"I'm going to listen. I'm not gonna be near her. I'm gonna try and forget about her and focus on myself. I plan on writing music. I'm gonna call my therapist and my psychiatrist. I might check myself into treatment if I need to or go to meetings for NA and AA." Craig told them honestly, "I just need you guys to know I haven't had a single drug or a sip of alcohol since I've been here. I've really got to get back to the straight and narrow."

"We'll be there for you." They both told him.

…

Tracker Cameron walked into The Dot in the early hours of the morning. While att he counter he managed to observe a woman about his brothers age slumped over a counter a latte next to her. She was sleeping silently her one hand on the counter propping up her head a once hot and now cold drink beside her she looked disheveled her auburn hair down and a mess lying beside her arm.

She still had a little black dress from the night before on her legs spread even though he wasn't looking but you could see her black lace panties. He tapped the woman's' shoulder but she didn't wake up. He sat at the bar beside her as a girl with dark hair and blunt cut bangs just looked at him and put her fingers to her lips shushed him remarking rather flatly, "That's just Ellie the drunk. She'll be up in a second."

He observed her little seemed like she had a night out and she wound up there tried to sober up with a coffee and dozed off. "So you just leave her there?" He asked with furrowed brow searching with his eyes for her name tag and muttering, "Katie."

She was kind of lowkey charmed by this older guy but she was much too young and not his type, "Where can I get a coffee?"

Katie slipped behind the counter and slapped a menu in front of him.

"Just a black coffee." Tracker happened to order thinking Katie was a waitress.

"I'm just the hostess, my boss was supposed to be here hours ago."

The auburn haired figure mumbled something inaudible and then fluttered her eyes open not moving from the spot and saw Tracker there. She quickly adjusted her legs and blushed. Tracker never met her before but he simply uttered, "You okay?"

Embarrassed she nodded but added avoiding his blue eyes, "I'm fine."

"Could I get you anything?"

"Black coffee and water."

"I'm just a guy," He took a cue from Katie, "I don't work here."

Katie rolled her eyes and straightened up while impatiently waiting for this lovefest to end and cleaning green with envy glaring at them as she cleaned up tables. Somehow despite the fact Ellie had been passed out embarrassingly enough he was rather smitten.

"Sorry I'm late getting in. Where's Fitz?" Emma ran in to Katie, noticing that they had customers and no waiter.

"Fitzy never showed up." Katie had been trying to get a promotion of sorts ever since Fitz has been slacking.

"Then wait on them consider it a promotion." Emma muttered only saw the pair from behind looking rather chummy and cozy. She knew Ellie crashes and burns but she's usually not there but she knows them unbeknownst to her. She went straight back to the office as Katie took their orders.

In the years after high school Ellie has taken a liking to alcohol. She's sort of a party girl. She works hard, she's successful and sometimes she parties a little too hard. She's single, unmarried and she likes her independence but she loves to flirt. She never thought back before that she'd be one of those girls who winds up in a coffee shop passed out from the night before but here she was. Ellie lived in the same high rise her friend Jimmy lived in during high school alone with her cat Andie named after her favorite romantic comedy Pretty in Pink. She's a journalist working for Asher Shostak a complete slime ball who has connection from her ex Jesse from university who she hasn't seen in years who helped get her the job. She's rebuffed Asher more times than she could count. He's not above sleeping his way to the top or having people sleep with him to get higher positions. Ellie is not into that. She may be single but she's not desperate. She's hungry but she has strong convictions. She's smart and practical and works hard. Katie brings them their coffees and they spend the afternoon together talking and Ellie slips Tracker her number. "I have to get ready to go to work but, call me?"