A.N: Hello my fantastic readers! I hope you are all safe and well. It's time for another chapter… another long chapter, throwing characters new and old into the mix. The title may give you a clue. Anyway as always if you have any constructive feedback please feel free to leave a review. I appreciate it.
Chapter 20 – A Man Of Learning, A Lady In Red
Hyrule Castle Main Library – 202 days A.G
"Oh, what lovely weather." Link mumbled sarcastically, glancing up from his book, as another gust of wind slammed a fresh wave of water against the massive stained-glass windows.
It was his second week at the library and his mission of learning politics had already made the transition from blind optimism to teeth grinding frustration and was now well on the way to disillusioned boredom. He'd come to this impressive two store monument to writing and history with high hopes that, somewhere amongst its numerous shelves and immeasurable volumes, there lay a title along the lines of "a beginner's guide to court politics". Any such hopes had been brutally crushed in an avalanche of irrelevant or indecipherable tomes on every aspect of Hyrule's court, its history and, least interestingly, its laws. By the time he eventually stumbled upon a book he thought to be vaguely promising, a voice of doubt was muttering in the back of his skull. The one thing keeping him going was the possibility, no matter how remote, he could help Zelda if he succeeded. In truth though, he hadn't a clue what he was looking for.
He hadn't seen or heard from the princess since the stable incident and his punishment was still a mystery, weighing on his mind and sapping his concentration. The book before him seemed reluctant to give away its secrets, its text employing such impenetrable language that the book could probably be better used as a shield. Heck, that appeared to be its only useful purpose, as he could barely understand the bloody thing! Yet, this baffling book was the best he could find and he was sure he was getting somewhere… very slowly.
Thoughtless fingers drummed a pattern on the desk, mirroring the pounding rain as he stared at a particularly enigmatic stretch of text, willing it to give up its secrets for him. The words, however remained uncooperative and with a frustrated sigh he cast his eyes round the room once more.
Nothing of any real interest lay behind him, just rows and rows of bookcases and shelves stretching to the back of the cavernous two storey chamber. The back and side walls were lined with volumes from the floor all the way up to the highly elaborate coffered ceiling of red plaster and gold leaf ornamentations, but the ceiling's beauty was now so well known to him that the novelty had worn off.
On a clear day he would have chosen a table close to the towering windows, to enjoy the spectacular view of the roofs of castle town and beyond it, the rolling green of Hyrule fields, but today the weather had drowned such sights in wind-swept waves, obscuring anything beyond the castle grounds. His one hope for salvation from his boredom lay in his choice of a table, in a shadowy alcove towards the rear of the reading area, which allowed him to casually spy on all his fellow library goers, some whom he recognised, either from his guard duties or his prior visits. He would hardly brand himself a voyeur, but there was no denying the subtle pleasure in watching the fully spectrum of castle society, from servants up to lords, so thoroughly engrossed in some tome or engaged in some chatter with their neighbours. He found amusement in the many eccentric gestures and expressions of those lost in the words they were reading. It was an area were all walks of life were truly equal. Be they courtier or nobleman, they all had the same propensity for sticking their tongue out or knitting their brows together.
Chatting, to his surprise, was not frowned upon here, unless it reached "inappropriate" volumes. Where the tolerance threshold ended appeared to be entirely down to who was there at the time.
Having surveyed the smattering of individuals, including a couple of library regulars, and found absolutely nothing warranting particular intrigue, Link shifted in his seat to try and catch a glance at the second-floor balcony only to receive a stab of protest from his ankle. As Zelda had suspected, his drunken falls had taken their toll on the poor limb, likely setting him back a week in terms of his recovery. Goddesses above, he had been such an idiot that day, drunk just as much on his freedom as the brandy! He'd embarrassed himself, almost sparked another political catastrophe and sentenced himself to further punishment, both literally and figuratively.
Another pulse of pain issued forth from the injured limb, calling his gaze to sink beneath the table to check whether there was any way of adjusting his improvised footstool. He'd had to arrive early to get it prepared and just hoped the custodians of the library continued to demonstrate the same professional lack of attention he had come to expect from them. He certainly doubted they'd appreciate discovering his unconventional use of their prized tomes. Then again, he'd deliberately chosen some particularly dull volumes no one in their right mind would find remotely interesting.
Concluding there was no practical way to adjust the leaning tower of dullness, he was about to try and penetrate the blasted book again when he caught the plod of approaching footfalls. He turned to the source and blinked in surprise at the identity of the individual.
"Shad? Is it really you?"
It really was, though his appearance was markedly dissimilar and arguably incompatible with the shy, babbling bookworm who'd helped him on his adventures. The young scholar's awkward expression made it clear he was painfully aware of that fact. Shad had not shaken his familiar baby-faced visage despite his best efforts at facial hair, which amounted to little more than a wispy goatee and a rather sorry attempt at a moustache. Other than that, his hair was just as curly, his ears just as pointy and his circular spectacles just as flimsy.
It was his attire which stood out, like taking ten thousand rupees to a Malo Mart. Standing completely at odds with both his personality and prior unassuming dress code of brown jacket, small black string tie and equally drab brown breeches, Shad instead sported an incandescent bright blue slitted doublet, complete with gold bejewelled accents while his neck was almost entirely consumed by a crisp high collar and an overbearingly frilly cravat. The look was finished off with breeches of a similar style to those Link had been subjected to for his audience with the princess, puffy to a degree that one would think could only be achieved via inflation by blacksmiths bellows. Mercifully for shad, his breeches were a far more palatable and subdued cream colour, unlike Link's banana yellow monstrosities.
Shad's reply cut short any ponderings on the reason for this dramatic metamorphosis. "Oh, Thank Nayru, Farore and Din you didn't address me as Lord Shad." The spectacled scholar groaned before giving Link a rueful smile "Please pardon my rudeness, Link, that's hardly the way to greet an old friend. How are you?"
"I'm alright. Bored but alright. How about you?"
"That's rather a long story."
"Well, I've got plenty of time."
"Aren't you reading. I'd hate to interrupt you. I know how it feels when you're riveted by a compelling Legend or a fascinating codex and then some oaf blunders in and starts blustering on…"
Oh dear, he was already starting to babble. "Shad." Link said, politely attempting to decapitate the fast stretching word snake before it throttled all intelligible dialogue.
The babbling continued unabated. "… about dull nonsense and asking your opinion on things that aren't your business, like who makes the best pie or what is…"
"Shad! Shad! It's fine. Now sit down… and slow down. Some of our brains don't work at the speed of summer lightning."
"Sorry…" Shad slid wearily into the seat next to him. "Funny you say that though. There's actually a theory positing the energy in lightning as being the same responsible for powering your thoughts. It's really a most intriguing concept, which revolves around the…"
"I'm sure it is intriguing Shad but it also a concept that I'm as likely to understand as Ashei is to grasp an ounce of tact." Link jibed wryly, cocking his head with a crooked smile.
"Oh yes, sorry. I'm just all politicked out and dearly wish I could discuss something more intellectually stimulating than some noble's petty problem with a tax reform for three hours."
"Hold up! Are you saying you're on the council?!"
"Well yes. I wouldn't be wearing this otherwise! I don't like to be mean and I know little of fashion but whoever dictated this to be the height of fashion seriously needs their head examined."
"So, they forced you to wear THAT?"
"Well, um… no…" Shad mumbled, hanging his head in embarrassment "The truth is… I chose to dress like this in the hopes that, by demonstrating my wealth with fancy clothes, I'd appear less of an outsider to all the nobles."
"And did it work?" Link knew the question was pretty much purely rhetorical but he asked anyway.
The spectacled scholar shook his head. "No. if anything, it just supplied them with more ammunition… though they already had plenty of objections to me regardless."
"So how did you end up on the council? It certainly isn't it a role I'd picture you choosing and you don't seem too keen on it."
"That's the long story I told you about."
"Ok. Let's hear it."
Shad released a long reluctant breath and scratched his fuzzy chin in contemplation. "Where to start… where to start…" he glanced off the window, still being lashes with gust driven waves of rain. He clicked his tongue. "In the immediate aftermath of the end of the Twilight's recession the kingdom was in disarray. Infrastructure was in shambles, basic commodities hard to come by and people in a state of panic. So, the princess ordered the founding of two groups, one run by most of the members of the resistance to keep order and the other, a collective of some of the greatest minds in Hyrule, which happened to recruit me of all people. Guess that shows just how desperately short they were, if they felt the need to choose me. Hm. Anyway, we were tasked with finding solutions to the various problems stifling Hyrule's recovery, one of which being a grave food shortage. It just so happened, by luck more than brains, that my studies of The City In The Sky inspired me to invent two machines which had the potential to double food production rates while also opening up wider access to clean water. The key to the dilemma was the filtration and controlled dissemination of concentrated…"
"Ahem" Link felt cruel for cutting him off from his deviation, particularly given the spark of enthusiasm, that had been notably absent from his own story, which Shad seemed desperate to rush through. Nevertheless, the hero knew he wouldn't understand the "science" and that the further Shad slipped into the topic the harder it would be to redirect him.
"Oh… um, yes. Sorry, got a little bit carried away. Now, where was I?"
"You'd just solved Hyrule's food problem."
"Ah yes. Well it turns out even the most miserly of nobles will pay to maintain their menu and combined with the princess's generous reward on top, I suddenly found myself so wealthy I began to rival the nobles for rupees. Turns out, however that the princess's generosity had yet to be satisfied and, for my service, both with the resistance and for my inventions, she offered me a title and an estate. Me, a Lord! With a manor… and servants! It certainly isn't where I pictured myself being but it was a most generous offer and it would be most impolite to reject a reward from royalty. Plus, the princess does seem to have a way with words. Hence, how I ended up on the council. She asked and I couldn't find… a way… to… say…" Shad trailed off and he simply stared entranced off towards the windows, his mouth slightly ajar with an unspoken word stuck on his immobile tongue.
After a moments bemusement at his friends bewitched state, Link followed his fixated gaze to see the spellcaster and instantly recognised her. On a chair beneath the besieged glass panes, perched daintily and engrossed in a book, was a beautiful blonde noblewoman with striking green eyes. Tamara. One of "The Three T's", who Link had only recently discovered were Zelda's chosen ladies in waiting. "The Three T's", also known as Tamara, Tasima and Terra were a trio of daughters of one of the members of the council and as far is the hero was currently concerned the T's translated to; Trouble, torment and terror.
The truth was, they were probably among the brightest, politest and most personable ladies of the court, lacking much of the ego, haughtiness and snobbery pervading the ranks of the upper crust. Their personalities were matched by their looks, making them the most desirable eligible ladies in the court, which was part of the problem. The other part was their alternative nickname "The Three Teases". They'd gained quite a reputation, spurning many a courtship proposal from esteemed nobleman, instead preferring to hunt down shy, retiring young men, regardless of job or social status and attempt to discover just how many shades of red their prey's face can produce.
Having been on the receiving end of such torment, he could attest to their ruthless efficiency, using flattery and "Innocent" flirtation to extract hues hot as lava from death mountain out of his cheeks. Though he was ultimately convinced they were entirely without malice in their never-ending quest to discover the reddest face in Hyrule, he had no doubt, to the utterly innocent Shad, such an experience would likely kill him. If that didn't do it then a jealous suitor might!
He wished he didn't have to do it but Link knew he had to save his oblivious friend from becoming an extra morsel on a suitor kebab, skewered by some insane beau, or worse still, be exposed to feminine wiles. First though, he had to break the enchantress's spell on the poor man.
He waved a hand in front of his spellbound friend. "Shad, Shad! Hyrule is calling!" He called trying not to raise his voice too much.
Trance broken, Shad jolted back to reality, blinking gormlessly at Link for a moment, before making a poor attempt it nonchalance. "Oh, sorry Link. I just lost my trail of thought for a second. Now, purely out of curiosity… you wouldn't happen to know the name of that striking blonde over by window, would you?" His pretence at nonchalance quickly crumbled as the question tumbled from his mouth so fast his tongue almost tripped in the mad dash to the answer.
Link sighed. Time for some tough love. "Yes and you should forget it. She's trouble."
Shad's gaze was back on the blonde beauty and he murmured "How could such beauty be trouble."
"Clearly you haven't met many women." The hero jibed drolly.
"What kind of trouble?"
Link decided to omit the lady's penchant for teasing to preserve shad's innocence along with his rose-tinted spectacles, referring instead, to a far more visceral threat. "The kind of short tempered, muscle bound trouble that would likely disembowel you if you came within 50 yards of their precious prize."
"You mean she's married?!" Shad howled despairingly, earning a few hisses and attracting half the eyes in the room, including the lady in question. On meeting her gaze, shad was briefly entranced only to break free and instantly shy away, shrinking into the chair and looking away, cheeks burning. Link caught the exchange, but also the smile playing on her lips at the scholar's reaction. She now had a new prey.
It was now even more paramount to dissuade shad from following his heart, lest the object of its infatuation cause it to stop beating. Nevertheless, he couldn't lie and say she WAS married. "No, she isn't married. she is, however, among the most desired eligible young ladies in the court and is currently being pursued by over a dozen suitors, many of whom are knights with long swords, short fuses and a penchant for duelling." He may have been overstating the danger somewhat but at least it was better than downright lies.
Shad's shoulders sagged and he stared forlornly at his fancy shoes in silence. Link didn't like seeing anyone like that but he knew it was for the best. He was glad it had worked… or so he thought.
Suddenly shad sparked into life. "Ah but just because she has plenty of suitors doesn't mean she likes them. I mean, the princess is the most eligible lady in the kingdom, and she apparently hasn't accepted a single proposal."
Zelda's been getting proposals! Link's whole body tensed and he ground his teeth. How dare they?! Who were they?! He'd… He'd… wait a moment… she's rejecting them! Woohoo! that's fantastic news!
Link's heart was busy dancing a merry jig until rationality grabbed it by the scruff of the neck and flung it back in the basement. Zelda's suitors were her business and it wasn't like he stood a chance of being a suitor himself. Here he was, trying to save Shad from his foolish heart, and his own was trying to outdo it for foolish infatuation. Get back on the topic at hand!
"Look, she may not like her suitors but it doesn't change the fact she has them or that they're all nobles and trained swordsmen,"
Shad's elation faded and he returned to stare in despondent silence at his shoes once more.
"I'm sorry Shad, but sometimes you just have to face it. The heart wants what the heart wants but sometimes you need to ignore it for your own safety."
There was a short pause and then a rueful nod. "Oh, I know, I know… Only fools rush in and I of all people should know well how to be rational. Besides who am I kidding. A guy like me… I'd never have a chance with an angel like her."
"Ah come on, enough of that. I'm simply saying it's better to save your limbs than risk them on a girl you don't even know. For all you know, she could have a terrible personality. Besides, you said earlier the nobles already dislike you. You don't want to give them more reasons, do you?"
The scholar sighed dejectedly, meeting Link's eyes from the corner of his own. "I guess you're right." His gaze then turned back to the unreachable blonde beauty and he whispered wistfully "Oh she doth teach the torches to burn bright… yet to love her is not my right."
"Shad, this ain't love, it's infatuation."
He was back to staring at his shoes, pushing his spectacles up from their precarious position. His shoulders, however had stopped sagging. "Well actually, Scholars and poets have been debating that distinction for decades and…" Shad froze, eyes fixated on something beneath the table, something appalling, judging by his expression. "Link, how could you!" he hissed.
With alarming speed, the Scholar dove beneath the table and wrenched Link's improvised footrest from under him with such unexpected force it sent the unprepared hero tumbling from his chair. With his view now restricted to the ceiling above, Link couldn't see how much attention they'd drawn but Shad didn't seem to care. "Minor miracles: The Mundanity Of Magic… A History Of Agriculture… The Botany Of Brewing. How could you treat such fantastic books this way?"
Link would have been angry were it not for the genuine consternation in the question. The hero groaned. "because I was injured and needed something to rest my foot on. Thanks for that, by the way."
Upon realisation of what he'd actually done, shad was immediately contrite and tried to help Link to his feet. "Oh gosh, I'm sorry Link, It's just… when I saw those priceless gems I was gripped by a compulsion to save them. But honestly why would you choose those? Why not some banal manual on sports or some cookery book?"
"I'll keep your recommendations in mind for next time." Link snarked, rubbing his back, more for dramatic effect than because it actually hurt. Maybe though, it would teach Shad to be more careful the next time he feels the need to pilfer a cripple's footstool.
"Sorry"
"Hey, no harm, no foul." The hero dusted himself off and straightened up, adding wryly "Did anyone ever tell you, you say sorry too much."
"Only since my promotion to Lord. Apparently, it's one of the reasons I stand out from the most of the nobles. They don't have it in their vocabulary."
"Sounds about right, not that I've met many, but the ones I have met… the boot fits."
"Oh yes, I heard about the trouble with Sir Halshaw. Is that the reason for your…?" He gestured to the injured ankle.
"Yep."
"So are you just here to pass the time till you can get back on duty…" Shad briefly perused the book Link had been struggling to decipher and adjusted his spectacles inquisitively. "… or is there more purpose to your reading?"
"Well that isn't what I would call pleasure reading."
"Then why are you reading it?"
"It's a mission."
"A mission?"
"Yeah" Link lowered his voice to a conspiratorial whisper. In truth he'd rather not tell anyone of his plan to aid Zelda but he was getting nowhere on his own and perhaps his friendly council bookworm could help. "I'm trying to learn a bit more about politics so I can support Zelda."
Shad seemed decidedly sceptical and after a moment gathering his thoughts, replied earnestly "Err, that's certainly a noble goal but HOW are you going to support her?"
This question left the noble hero flummoxed and he was left scraping round back roads of his mind trying to find a sensible answer other than admitting he hadn't got that far yet. Unfortunately, none arrived to save him. "Well, I don't currently know, as I don't know enough about politics to figure it out. Indeed, that's the very reason I'm reading. Hopefully when I understand more I can help."
"But aren't you helping as her guard?"
Link struggled to keep his voice down as he rebuffed the question, unable to fully conceal a hint of bitterness. "I'm not HER guard. I'm just A guard, one of over a hundred, whose main contribution to the kingdom and the princess seems to be nothing more than guarding empty hallways and breaking up petty squabbles. There has been nothing requiring of my talents and the only dangers the princess faces all come from court politics. I'm, supposedly, a hero and as a hero I should be protecting the princess, but I'm not. If anything, the princess has been protecting me! Well, I refuse to just stand by and watch as she battles the forces of the court alone, all the while shielding me from the consequences of my own mistakes. I have to do something!"
His scholarly friend regarded him contemplatively, stroking his wiry goatee as his eyes flicked from the hero's determined face to the book before being drawn to Tamara. After some quick calculations his attention snapped back to Link. "You certainly wont be much help to her highness reading this, unless you plan on aiding her in tax dispute tribunals…" No wonder the chapter didn't make a lick of sense! "but you seem determined to help so… I MAY be able to teach you a few things, though I can't particularly see how any of it could be relevant given you're not on the council." He clicked his tongue in hesitation and glanced away. "There is, however, something I would hope you could do in return."
"And what's that?"
Shad's gaze was once again on his blonde infatuation and for a moment he didn't answer. Link was beginning to wonder if he'd fallen into another trance when he turned back of his own accord. "Oh, it's nothing really. Let's just say, if I teach you, only if I succeed might I add, then can we say you owe me a favour?"
"Sure"
"Ok, I have to warn you, I'm not particularly experienced with the art of tutelage, especially when it comes to intricate complexities of the court, but I'll do my best. Shall we start now?"
"If that's fine with you."
"Ok, then if you'll just take a seat and I'll go and find a book which is actually relevant… Oh and I'll put THESE books back where they are safe…" He snatched up the three books which had been Links footstool. "and respected." He made a display of dusting off the books before disappearing off amongst the shelves. A few minutes later he returned with a single book that had clearly not received much respect, judging by it's tatty cover. "Well, this isn't perfect, but I'm sure there's some points of interest." He tried and failed to project a front of cheeriness but the ill-disguised groan as he sat gave away his reluctance.
"Look, I appreciate the offer but if you don't want to do it then I'll just read the book myself. No need to put yourself out for me."
"No, no I'll teach you… because I predict you'll need it. Not that I'm suggesting you're unintelligent Link, only that some of this stuff is blood…" Shad winced "err, very complicated. Pardon my Language Link, I've just been stuck with bickering nobles for three hours and this isn't exactly what I would consider pleasurable reading either." He thumbed through the pages, scanning for a suitable starting point, mumbling under his breath "Where to start, hmm where to start, no… hmm, definitely not… Aha! This looks promising. We can begin here."
Link's first lesson was interrupted before it even started by the arrival of a man clad in what could best be described as the aftermath of a firework display in a paint shop. The baggy foreign garment was so loud, exploding in eyepopping reds, yellows and greens, he half expected the man to be thrown out for disturbing the peace.
While this mystery man attracted a fair few glances along with a couple of raised eyebrows, he remained unobstructed as he made a beeline for their table. "Ah grittings Lord Schad, a man of lorning I see." The man spoke with a thick foreign accent, the sort which plays bingo with the vowels and rolls its r's like a horde of purring cats. This could take some translating!
"Educating the pisants I sea, a noble and shroud endivor. A contry unvilling to do so is une clarly too… too foulish to do so." Link may have struggled to fully decode the strident cart-wreck of a sentence but he got the gist of it. Who are you calling peasant?!
He opened his mouth to speak but Shad jumped in just in time. "Oh, uh Sir Tywin, greetings. This is actually, um, let me introduce Sir Link, the Hero of Hyrule."
"Aye, my apolergies Sir Link. I simply thot from your git up… I'd hard you com from homble stoke but I wood have thot the cort wood reword you with bitter attear. I am Sir Tywin Bonamis Pelimis the second, Grond Dook of Landringall at your sirvice." He bowed.
Link rose from his seat and returned an awkward bow, partly as a result of his ankle but mostly out of distrust of Tywin. It wasn't the man's foreignness that left the hero on edge but his "Nobleness" as perfectly encapsulated by his clothes, his manner and, most tellingly of all, his astonishingly immaculate walnut moustache, the ends of which had been teased into spirals tapering to ends so sharp they could probable poke your eyes out. Then again, the Grand Duke had offered an apology, so that set him apart from the rest at least, although he couldn't dismiss Halshaw's apparently genuine apology. Those bottles of brandy had been the real deal and had been greatly appreciated by their new owners. Perhaps he should work on reserving judgement.
"I have com, sucking insporation to help woe your fair and bootiful royal highniss…" Ok, no need to reserve judgement. The man was a bastard! Not to mention that he was at least fifteen years the princess's senior. How arrogant could he be to think he deserve her?! "… My mind is perforated with thots of soch janius… "
"What, like a sieve?" Link quipped dryly. It was a low blow to mock a foreigner for a poor grasp of another language, but frankly the Grand Duke deserved a little mockery… and it absolutely wasn't jealousy! His brain had mercifully reached the point now where he could translate the Duke into sensible sentences.
"No, they cannot be contained. They must be expressed, Sprinkled into her highness's keen…" The Duke proclaimed stridently, blissfully unaware of Link's little jibe at his expense.
"Exactly. Like a sieve."
"No, a siff keeps things in."
Ok, so his translation skills clearly weren't perfect! "Er, what?"
It was at this point that a thoroughly uncomfortable shad whispered in the hero's ear "I think he meant safe."
"Safe what?"
"As in a safe, a strong metal cabinet with a lock."
"I know what a safe is. What's that got to do with this?"
"Because he thought you said safe rather than sieve." Oh, of course. It was obvious when you thought about it. Link rolled his eyes and turned back to a bemused but, nevertheless, entirely unoffended duke and gave a forced smile. "My apologies. I was lost in translation."
The duke didn't bat an eye as he replied "Do not mention it, dear friend…" Dear friend?! They weren't friends. They'd just met and if they were going to be anything, it would be rivals… both basking in delusions of grandeur that either of them stood a chance with her. "… it is to be expected of one with your upbringing." Link would have interpreted that as a bare faced insult, If not for Tywin's apparent obliviousness and strident earnestness. With rationality finally reining in his stupid infatuation and his only response to such a line being an insult, he decided to remain silent and just let the comment slide into the ether, to be forgotten.
Shad took over trying to restore some sense of civility to proceedings. "So, Sir Tywin. As… undeniably grateful as we are for your gracing us with your presence, is there any service we can render for you, or was this purely a… social call?"
"Hmm, yes there is. Being a man of learning, I guessed you might know the structuring of this great library and may be able to direct me towards the poetry of your people."
Shad scratched his long ear in bemusement. "Um, ok I think so but it depends what sort of poetry you're after."
"Oh, just some of your great romantic poetry. I am seeking further inspiration for a verse I am writing in honour of my betrothed, her royal highness."
"Betrothed! You mean you're engaged?!" Link blurted, managing to supress the volume though not the words themselves.
"No, not yet, but given such a choice as me it is but all guaran… guaran…"
"Guaranteed?" Link drawled. Farore, what an ego!
"That's word. My grasp of your language is imperfect but I promise this. By the time I am king I will master it. So, Lord Schad, can you assist…" The Grand Duke had been surveying the library when his gaze fell upon Tamara, who was entirely absorbed in her reading, blissfully unaware of his ogling. Tywin smacked his lips and Link caught him murmur "Ahoi, hoi" under his breath. "Would either of you happen to be acquainted with that fine young lady over there in the corner?"
Link struggled to keep anger from his voice as he snapped. "No. Besides aren't you soon to be engaged to her royal highness?"
"Soon but not yet. All the more reason to sample the of your kingdom before I commit to the same meal for the rest of my life. Oh well, I guess I will have to introduce myself." With a quick tug of his colourful robe and producing his best "charming" smile to show off his inhumanly pearly whites, he turned on his heel in a surprisingly effeminate manner and strode off towards the damsel, soon to be in distress, utterly oblivious to the united glares searing his back.
The lovesick Scholar glared at a romantic rival to a lady he could never hope to be with anyway, while the lovelorn hero simmered at the blaggards flagrant disregard for his princess. Link soothed his ire with the prediction that the "Grand Dook" may soon be served a slice of humble pie, if the rumours of the Three T's tastes in men were true. Shad, unaware of those rumours and thus denied their comfort, balled his hands into fists, though his hung head and sagging shoulders gave away despondent resignation.
After a moment watching his friend sink ever lower in his seat, Link stepped in the only way he could think of. "Hey, cheer up mate. For all we know she may not like him."
Shad gave a hallow chuckle. "It doesn't change the fact that, regardless of his chances, mine are a million to one. I mean let's face it, Women like a man who has charm and he has far more than me. If she doesn't like him then… I stand no chance. I possess all the personal charm of a history lecture on the Flaxian plague of the third age."
"I think you're giving the grand duke too much credit on the charm front. I think the word you're actually looking for is obnoxious. Besides not all beautiful ladies have the same tastes."
"No, but it is a rather basic prerequisite that you are capable of stringing words together in their presence and on topics that they not only understand but are interested in. Besides, weren't you the one, a few minutes past, telling me how she had a horde of angry, bloodthirsty suitors just waiting to make mincemeat of any young pretender."
"Well, I may have laid that on a bit thick…" Link conceded before the duo were distracted by the loud snap of a book from across the room. Tamara had risen from her seat to the apparent puzzlement of Tywin, with whom she had conversed for all of three minutes. She gave a dignified but curt "Good day Sir Tywin", picked up the voluminous folds of her burgundy red gown and swept from the from room, so swiftly her blonde tresses billowed out behind her.
The hero restrained a smirk of satisfaction, however something of the lady's departure had left his friend thunderstruck. He was about to enquire when the cause of the commotion and irritation arrived looking somewhat perplexed.
"So how did it go?" Link asked innocently.
The grand duke gave a little cough "I'm not entirely sure. She called me a… fill… fillhand… fillhandring flopdiddle. What does that mean?"
Fillhandring flopdiddle? He'd never heard of… wait a second… fill-hand-ring… Philandering fopdoodle! Oh boy. He couldn't think of a polite way to put it but he'd rather not cause another fiasco at court. "Shad, care to explain?" He asked, hoping to pass the buck to someone far more qualified with words.
Shad, however, was still coming out of his state of shock and simply stared gormlessly at them "Wait, explain what?"
"The lady Tamara called me a fillhandring flopdiddle. What does it mean?"
"The Lady Tamara…" He whispered dreamily before snapping back to reality and snapping "Wait, why would you ask me that? I have no idea what…"
"My apologies, Grand duke, could you excuse us for just a moment" Link grabbed the bewildered shad by the arm and dragged him unceremoniously behind the nearest bookcase.
"Um, Link, what are we doing? I have no idea a what fill hand ring or whatever it was…" Shad whispered as he hastily straightened his skewed spectacles.
"She called him philandering fopdoodle." Link hissed back
"Ok and er, what does fopdoodle mean?"
"A fopdoodle is a useless vain idiot."
"Oh… Ok so if you know already, why didn't you just tell him?"
"Right. Tell a prominent foreign dignitary, a suitor of the princess, that one of her ladies in waiting just called him an unprincipled incompetent with the vanity and intelligence of a peacock?! Err, no. I'd rather not be involved in yet another diplomatic incident."
"ANOTHER incident? Just how many have you…"
"Just the one… ok technically three, but it doesn't really matter how many. I've already had my fair share and it's usually the princess who has to pick up the pieces, so… I'd like to avoid it if possible."
"I see your point… but… what do you want me to do?"
"Well, you're good with words. Perhaps you could find a more diplomatic way of saying it."
"Being an intellectual and knowing the dictionary off by heart brings you no closer to wielding words effectively."
"Shad, now is not the time to be ped… ped…"
"Pedantic? Sorry… it just I can't see what I can do."
"So, you don't have any ideas at all?"
"A diplomatic way of calling someone an unprincipled idiot?! I'm afraid not."
"Great, then we'll have to lie. Are you good at lying?"
"No, sorry."
"Me neither. Anyway, even if he believes us, there's no guarantee he wont ask someone else again later or worse, try using it himself."
"Unless…" Shad's eyebrows suddenly shot towards the ceiling as the spark of an epiphany light up his face "we find a way to tell the truth but in such a vague manner that it's susceptible to reinterpretation. After all, the best lies, even when exposed can be seen as the truth from a certain point of perspective."
On hearing it, the idea made sense… a very twisted kind of sense but sense none the less. The question was how they were going to pull it off? They couldn't wait much longer. Their little conspiracy conference was suspicious enough as it was and a glance round the bookshelf revealed the Duke still waiting by the table, arms crossed and tapping his foot impatiently.
"Alright, so how do we do that, bearing in mind Sir Tywin's already getting impatient."
"I don't know? I'm not that sort of creative mind. Give me some science dilemma or ancient mystery and I'll…"
Shad's babbling faded into obscurity as it was Link's turn to have his moment of genius. That's it! Just focus on one or two elements. The duke is clearly vain and obsessed with fashion and, it's close cousin, etiquette. Another word for fashion is style, but style has other meanings, other interpretations! A truly rare stroke of genius.
"I've got it!" he proclaimed triumphantly.
"You have?!" Shad murmured in astonishment.
"Yes, we simply say something like… "an unflattering term for your style" something like that."
Shad seemed sceptical "Um, I think there's more to it than…"
"No time for that, Sir Tywin is waiting. Trust me." Without waiting for a response Link strode out to face the duke, Shad hesitantly in tow. "Ah, Sir Tywin, Apologies for the wait. To answer your question a Fopdoodle is an… unflattering term for someone's style."
"Hmm, and the fillhandring."
"An unflattering term for someone's attitude." Shad piped up.
"So… she was insulting me?"
"Oh, well, yes, sort of…" Shad admitted only for Link to hastily interject "Only a little."
"Really?" The duke's eyes narrowed suspiciously and his brows furrowed. The intensity of the Sir Tywin's gaze gave Link the unnerving sensation that the duke was trying to scoop out his brain to examine it. Despite this, Link held his gaze placidly. He watched immaculate fingers, which had clearly never seen a day of work in their lives, reached up to tweak one spiral of the walnut moustache pulling it straight before allowing to spring back as the silent inquisition continued.
Link was starting to worry when the inquisition was suddenly relinquished and the duke simply tutted nonchalantly. "Well, there is no accounting for a lady's tastes… But then why did you head off behind the bookcase?"
"Well, um we weren't sure whether we should say. We didn't want to offend you…"
"Bah, think not in it. It was she who said, not you and what man would I be if I cared for the opinions of ladies. Now enough distractions. Please Friend Schad, point me to inspiration?"
Shad obliged, directing him to a far-off bookshelf and, with another bow, the duke departed. With danger finally averted they could relax and Shad promptly slumped into his seat, as though exhausted, taking a few long calming breaths. "Phew, so glad that's over. When you mentioned diplomatic incidents, I was suddenly reminded of the Goron blackyard rebellion and how that started. I didn't want to start a war in my first week on the council, haha, not that I ever want to start a war, I mean…" He shivered "The twilight was more than enough."
The scholars tone told Link all he needed to know. As much as it could sabotage his earlier efforts to protect him, Shad clearly needed something else to take his mind off such dour topics and from his own infatuation, he knew just how potent a distraction it could be. He just hoped he could rein it in. "So, when Tamara left, what was it that left you looking like you'd just glimpsed her garters?"
Shad's head caught fire from his cheeks to the tips of his ears and Link half expected jets of steam to burst forth. He whirled round with such force as to almost dislodge his glasses from his head, spluttering "I.I.I.I.I didn't see, I mean um, nothing untoward happened."
"I never suggested it had. You just seemed pretty flabbergasted at whatever it was."
"Oh, yes." Shad mumbled, now even more embarrassed turning to stare at the table and replacing his spectacles. "It was the book she was reading."
Not quite what Link had expected, but considering this was Shad, he shouldn't have been surprised. Nevertheless… "The book?"
"Yes, meditations on myth: forgotten histories! Of all the books she could have chosen, it had to be that! Why? Why?"
"It's a bad book?"
"It's one of my favourites!... Have you ever felt like fate was tormenting you, showing you perfection knowing all too well you couldn't possibly be worthy of it?"
Oh, Link knew the feeling only too well but he wasn't going to openly admit it. He was struck by a pang of guilt for warding his friend off but given Shad's extreme embarrassment at his little joke, he knew it was nevertheless the right call. Even so, it wasn't Shad's worthiness that was the issue and he didn't like seeing any friend beat themselves up over such things. The hero did enough for everyone. "Don't put yourself down. It's not your worthiness that's the problem, it's the rest of her fan club. Besides, no one's perfect…"
"Except Zelda!" Link's infatuation hastily corrected. Oh, do shut up! "… No one, not even her."
The chatter of other library goers and the lashing of the rain briefly took centre stage, while the scholar seemed to contemplate his words. The response was unexpected. A wry laugh and a nod.
"What?"
"Oh nothing, nothing. Now, I recall offering to teach you something about politics. How about we get the ball rolling." He slid the open book in front of Link.
Link read the chapter title with scepticism. "Anatomy of artist… aristocracy and hier…archy? Are you sure about this?"
"No, but I figured its probably best to begin with basic principles, particularly as you need to know what you're dealing with and, frankly, I need inspiration on possible directions to take you. I haven't a clue whether this will assist you with your goal to protect the princess, but it's the best I can think of. So, get reading and we'll see where this goes."
Link sighed reluctantly and began reading. The first couple of pages gave him a burst of confidence, as he understood pretty much every word. However, as he delved deeper into the dense literary forest he soon realised the author had played a cruel trick on him and found himself encountering vines of contradiction, conceptual quagmires or long vicious, brain-squeezing, words in ever increasing frequency. Shad, eminent scholar that he was, made many a concerted rescue attempt but he proved only semi-competent as a guide, sometimes lacking the lateral thinking required to put his directions in plain simpleton, occasionally striking off too far ahead and, on one occasion, falling into a quagmire Link had actually managed to avoid. The key to that one had been not to overthink it.
The chapters stretched on, trees and trees of pages and the minutes dragged by until after an hour of struggle the courageous, if foolhardy duo finally extricated themselves from its prickly vegetation and slumped back in their chairs, exhausted from the effort. They'd managed two chapters and Link hadn't managed to grasp all of it, despite shad's best attempts to teach him.
"I still don't get the point of the stratified… whatever it is."
"Well, I'm afraid there's no other way I can think to explain it. I'm sorry Link, but it looks like I'm not the teacher for you."
Link groaned "Grrrr. Why does everything in politics have to be so needlessly complicated?!"
Shad was about to reply when a sudden raucous laugh from just behind them almost had him falling from his chair in shock. "HAHAHAHA, Link, only a guy like you could possibly be surprised by that." Ashei's mirthful twang faltered slightly as every single eye in the room rounded on her and they hissed in unison. "Oh come on, I wasn't that loud!"
By the time the audience of glaring gazes had returned to their books and conversations, Shad had managed to retrieve his composure and glasses, both of which had vacated his cranium in the commotion. "Not that I'm not pleased to see you, Ashei, but would it kill you to announce yourself."
"Announce myself?! Watch it, Shad, sounds like your title's going to your head. Clearly their fashion sense has already rubbed off on you…" She chuckled before turning surprisingly earnest for just a second. "Congratulations by the way, you deserve it yeah… Plus you aren't the stupidest I've seen in that style" her violet orbs flicked briefly to Link, accompanied by a sly smirk, to which the hero just snorted and rolled his eyes.
"Well, thank you Ashei. I must admit I'm shocked to see you here, in a place reserved for bookworms such as myself. Are you now a reading convert or did you just come to scare me?"
"Hey, I never said all books were bad, just the sort you insist on reading…" As Ashei protested, Link noticed two objects tucked under her arm, which caught his attention. A parchment peaked out from behind a book but not just any book… the title Shields and hearts of gold was emblazoned in fine gold lettering over a bright red cover. The title and bright red cover screamed romance novel. Well, well, well Ashei!
"Got some light reading there, Ashei?" Link drawled slyly
Ashei's face suddenly bore the expression of someone waking from one of those dreams where you walk into the mess with no clothes on. Instinctively, she clutched the book to her chest to preserve her image… by doing her best to conceal the title. From his gaze though the swordmaiden knew he'd seen the it. Her initial terror turned quickly to an air of cool casual nonchalance. "What, this?! Pfff don't be stupid. As if I'd go for this soppy nonsense. Can't stand the stuff. Can't see the appeal myself but a friend asked me to get it for them. Yeah… yeah"
"A friend?"
"Yeah, Neela. Neela apparently loves this kind of stuff. This is the second in some series and she's been going on and on about it for weeks but she was always too busy to come to the library so she begged me to…"
"Hi Ashei!" Came the chirpy tones of a certain short, sandy haired handmaiden, bobbing towards them. This was clearly a figment of their collective imaginations as the real Neela was FAR too busy to come to the library.
Ashei nevertheless hailed this illusion, struggling to maintain her cool. "Oh um, hi Neela. I'm SURPRISED to see you here." She gave Neela a "meaningful" look.
"Really?! Why would you say…" The bubbly "apparition" missed the look but spotted the book in the swordmaiden's tight clutches and gasped. "Oh my goddesses, you're on the second book already, trust me, you'll love it even more than the first…" Ashei's cheeks spontaneously ignited with embarrassment, anger or a mix of the two. With Ashei one rarely came without the other. Regardless of combination it seemed to have robbed her of her tongue as her imaginary friend continued to babble excitedly. "Oh, I can't wait to hear what you think of Caspian and Geneviene in the next book, and the introduction of…"
"Neela, Neela this isn't for me. YOU asked ME to get this for YOU." Ashei tried again with an even more meaningful look than the last. Link had to admire her persistence in attempting to salvage her cover story, even if it was all in vain, shattered by her boisterous buddy's exuberant entrance.
The Handmaiden noticed the new look but obviously was having trouble translating it. "But why would I do that? I've already got…"
A blood vessel throbbed just below Ashei's temples. "Excuse us, just a sec." She hissed, grabbing a thoroughly bemused Neela by the arm and disappearing behind the same bookcase Link had used earlier for cover.
The hero and the scholar exchanged amused glances but waited in silence for the two ladies to re-emerge, which they did a minute later.
"Oh, thank you for your thoughtful gift, Ashei. It completely slipped my mind."
"Don't MENTION it. Yeah. Now, I'll see ya around. I've got to have a word or two with these two gentlemen and, um… Neela… why are you following me?"
"Well I need to speak to Link too. It's the very reason I came. To deliver a message from the princess." The news almost sent the hero springing from his seat.
"Ah, err, fine." Ashei mumbled awkwardly
The cheery handmaiden skipped round to the front of the table to face Link and pulled out a scroll. "Greetings Sir Link, I'm so sorry but I have to do this…" She unrolled the yellow parchment and began to read in her best attempt at grand and authoritative. "Ahem, her royal highness formally requests the attendance of Sir Link, the Hero of Hyrule, on the 14th day of the month of May at 5:00pm. He will await her highness's summons in the waiting area outside the royal wing where, upon his summoning, he will receive his punishment as decreed by the crown. Failure to attend will result in forfeit of privileges and position and possible incarceration at her highnesses pleasure. Missive recorded by Mr Basil, blah, blah, blah, frowny sour bread the Fifth, on the word of her highness Princess Zelda Melania Bosphoramus the Third of Hyrule." Message complete she closed the scroll and waited expectantly for the hero's response
Well that all sounded rather ominous… apart from the frowny sour bread bit. Whatever this punishment was, he was set to find out tomorrow afternoon. "Ok, tomorrow afternoon. I've got that but Neela, you wouldn't happen to know what this punishment is?"
"Sorry Link, the princess has sworn me to secrecy and as dashing and gentlemanly as you are, I could never betray her. Between you and me though, It's not as bad as the message makes it sound. Cheerio hero and…" she lent in to whisper "good luck with Ashei." With that she dashed off and moments later Link felt and heard a gauntleted hand grasp the back of his chair, a similar clunk striking the back of shad's and the raven-haired swordmaiden's unnerving leer slid into view between the two.
"Now gentlemen, speaking of punishments…" She began menacingly.
"Excuse me, good warrior lady. I wish to speak to Sir Link." Ah, the Grand duke had returned with exquisite timing.
"Oh, of course. The hero is open for business!" Ashei huffed, throwing her hands up in frustration.
"Thank you, good lady. Now Sir Link, I couldn't help but overhear you have been summoned tomorrow to be punished by the princess…" Err, he could be pretty certain the princess wouldn't be the one punishing him personally! "… I am not interested to hear your crime or judge you. I simply think there's a way we can help each other. If you were to deliver my masterful poem to her highness tomorrow, I'm sure her heart would swell so from such a romantic verse from her favourite suitor she would be compelled to grant mercy to the one who presented it." Link's jaw dropped. Was this man for real?! "Do you not agree?"
"Well, uuuummmm…"
"Overcome with my genius I see. Not surprising." He slipped a sheet of paper into the gobsmacked hero's frozen hand. "No need to thank me. Now I must leave you. Sir Link, Lord Schad, Dear Lady I bid you all good day." He bowed low and departed, leaving his masterwork in the hero's hands, purely on the absurd assumption of Link's inevitable agreement to deliver it. Link was in half a mind to jump after him in protest but he didn't want to cause a scene. He could only stare dumbfounded at the folded sheet lodged precariously between his loose fingers.
"Who was that foreign tit? Could barely understand a word he said." Ashei grumbled in mild irritation, though not as much as the hero expected. Something had piqued her interest.
"Grand Duke Tywin Bonamis Pelimis the second of Landringall, One of her highness's suitors."
"Really now?" The swordmaiden shivered "The things the princess has to endure for her kingdom. Now on the important stuff yeah."
Link finally escaped his stunned stupor "You mean our punishment?" He had a pretty good idea what it was about. When he rounded on Ashei however, he got a distinctly different impression as he saw her fixated gaze, the same magpie stare she'd shown to his letter from Zelda.
"That can wait. I want to see this grand duke's masterwork for myself!" With her warrior reflexes she snatched the paper from Link's casual grip and opened it, much to Shad's dismay.
"You can't do that! It's for the princess and as… irritating as the grand duke can be, he deserves the basic courtesy of privacy as…"
"Oh relax, Lord spoilsport. It's not like he's going to find out and… oh… oh my…" The swordmaiden started toying with one of her pigtails and biting her lip as she continued reading.
Wait a second?! Was she… "You do realise, it isn't written for you."
"I know that!" She snapped before her voice softened "I have to say though, for a man who can't speak straight, he sure has a way with words."
"Really?!" Shad blurted in surprise. Surprise quickly turned to suspicion. "Hmm, let me see it."
"Hey, I haven't finished yet!... oh… hmmhmm."
"Ashei, you're making noises." Link asked with a smirk.
Ashei's cheeks were set ablaze again. "Making… making noises! Oh, um, perhaps you should have it Shad." The swordmaiden was suddenly all too eager to get rid of it.
Seeing her reaction, the ever-merciful hero couldn't resist toying with his flustered friend. "So, when you had the book which, of course, absolutely wasn't for yourself, I spied a piece of parchment with it. A love poem of your own?"
"Absolutely not!" The swordmaiden was indignant, but her tone quickly acquired a faint note of worry as she explained. "Actually, it was one of three more posters criticising the princess, which have been cropping up across Castle Town in the last week." The news effectively punctured Link's amusement and it must have shown on his face as she immediately tried to reassure him. "Oh, not to worry Link. We'll catch the culprits. I've already ordered an increase in night patrols in castle town starting tonight. It seems to be when they operate and sooner or later we'll catch them. They can't hide forever."
He tried his best to look reassured, repeating to himself that whatever these posters claimed they were just words, but he couldn't suppress his anger and unease at the thought of mysterious street thugs slandering the princess's good name. He was about to reply when a sudden and most uncharacteristic snigger to his left caught both of them off guard. Both hero and swordmaiden turned to their scholarly friend in amazement as the snigger grew to a hearty guffaw. Whatever the amusement was, it had rendered Shad oblivious to the many stares drawn his way. It seemed to be something about the poem.
"Err, Shad. Care to share?"
"Mmmm? Oh, sorry Link. I was just marvelling. Marvelling at the sheer cheek of it all. My goodness it's truly magnificent!" Shad's voice jumped a full octave and he appeared to be on the verge of hysterics, tears welling in his eyes.
"Err, what cheek?"
"The poem! Oh gosh, The poem! The poem! It is a monument… to sheer unadulterated plagiarism. A chaotic gallimaufry of lines pilfered from ten of Hyrule's greatest romantic poems, mashed together with no consideration of meaning. I mean he's actually picked two lines describing her hair and I assume he is supposed to be describing the princess, yet one of the lines says she possesses raven locks and the other a waterfall of golden honey, neither of which of course fit. But it gets better. Oh, it gets better because one of the poems he plagiarised… as actually about a man. Clearly he didn't know the meanings of sonorous or sinewy but surely the rest of the poem must have given a clue to the context."
"Well, to be fair I know the meanings of neither." Ashei scoffed in annoyance, folding her arms.
Shad peered at her incredulously for a second before continuing with a shake of his head. "Never mind that. The most absurd part is he's actually included lines from a poem about… about, well… you know what I mean…" The wheels of fate had turned once more and now it was Shad's turn to burn with embarrassment.
Ashei saw a chance at revenge. "About?" she enquired with false innocence.
The spectacled scholar lent in reluctantly and after a pregnant pause whispered "SEX!" instantly hanging his head in shame at his utterance of such a dirty word.
Ashei rolled her eyes. "Well, even I picked up on those! Most of them were pretty tame if you ask me."
Shad's blush deepened. "It didn't stop the poem from being banned for almost a century… at least among high society."
"Really?! Over that! I hear lewder stuff from some of the guards on a weekly basis. The nobility seems as wet as a Zora's tail."
"Maybe now it wouldn't be considered so bad but at the time the whole poem was considered racy. It was, however one particular euphemism, which led to its notoriety."
"Straight Hyrule please."
"Um, well the last two lines eluded to both the man and woman, um…"
"Holding hands?"
"No"
"Kissing?"
"No"
"Oh, does it begin with a C?"
"Yes"
"Ah, cuddling."
Fearing Shad's head literally bursting into flames, Link finally intervened "Enough of that Ashei. You know what he meant."
"Spoilsport, I was just getting a little revenge. Speaking of which, let's get back to where we left off before Sir Grand Duke interrupted us." Her hands returned to the backs of their chairs and she leaned in, trying her best to look imposing. "Being my friends, I'm sure neither of you would believe such an idea, much less do such a thing but… If I ever hear catch anyone spreading ridiculous rumours about me READING ROMANCE NOVELS!" Ashei mocked a gag of disgust "then they will suffer a fate worse than those poster planting creeps in Castle town. Do I make myself clear? Yeah."
Shad gulped but Link was unintimidated by her display. He knew Ashei well enough to realise the emptiness of her threat. Though she'd tried to hide it, he'd long suspected that she had a far softer centre than her prickly exterior implied and todays revelation all but proved him right. Nevertheless, he wasn't going to antagonise a friend to prove a point, so he nodded. "Of course. We'd never believe such a ridiculous notion."
"Thank you. Nice to know you have friends you can depend on." Having run the gambit of expressions from embarrassment to anger to annoyance and back throughout their conversations, the swordmaiden's visage finally returned to the grin she had been wearing when she'd announced her presence. "So, Link how's the ankle? Reckon you'll be back to sparring soon?"
"It's still hurting so not for a while yet."
"Ah come on. It's getting so boring without you. Hey Shad, perhaps you should come down sometime."
"Er, I don't think that's really the place for me."
"You'll need to toughen up at some point, bookworm. Anyway, I hope we can meet up sometime. I want to hear wear what the great Lord Shad makes of his new position. Perhaps we three grab a drink at Telma's bar next week."
"I don't really drink."
"Hey, neither did Link before he joined the guard. Now he's going out and buying premium brandy."
"That was only as a gift." Link hastily interjected.
"And a fine gift it was. Look, I'm not suggesting we go and get plastered. Just a casual drink and a catch up. Telma will no doubt be happy to see you as well and it will be the first time I've been there since my ban was lifted."
This was news to Link. "Hold up, you were banned? I never heard."
"Drinking contest, long story. Important thing is I won. Anyway, how about it. Next Friday, midday?"
"Alright"
Shad conceded with a nervous tug of his frilly cravat. "Sure. I guess I'll give it a go. It would also be nice to see Telma again."
"That's the spirit. Now, much as I'd love to stay and chat. I've got duties. See ya around."
With that they bid the swordmaiden farewell and shad rose from his chair. "Link, my friend, it's been a pleasure meeting you again. Sorry I couldn't be more help with your "secret mission" but I may know someone else who could help." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a gold engraved watch. Wow, he really had embraced the noble lifestyle! One glance at the ornate timepiece however was enough to turn the scholar white. "Gosh, is that really the time?! Sorry Link, I've got to run. I'm late!" Practically throwing the grand duke's poem at his friend, he turned and dashed pell-mell for the door, holding his spectacles on his head with one hand.
Link was alone once more, free to contemplate this library sessions "extraordinary" events. He had learnt much and yet accomplished absolutely nothing of what he'd set out to do. His "secret mission" had barely progressed beyond its starting point and he struggled to remember what little Shad had tried to teach him. Who was this mystery individual who Shad thought may be able to help him?
It was fair to say his appearance had been unexpected but not unwelcome. The scholar may not be fond of his new position but it was a comfort to Link knowing Zelda now had another ally in the council. Still, the news of more slanderous posters disturbed him and he felt compelled to do a little night hunting in Castle Town. His ankle was still complaining though and it would be highly unlikely he'd be able to catch the culprits when he couldn't run.
Then there was his punishment. He now had a date and time but the nature of his torment remained a mystery.
Last and by all means least important was this plagiarised poem he was expected to deliver to HIS princess, from a man who looked and sounded like a drunk peacock squawking through a beak full of sticky treacle pudding. This foreign fopdoodle thought he could marry Zelda! No chance! Not if he could help it.
He flicked the paper between his fingers and pondered its fate. He had no curiosity or desire to read it. Shad had made it clear what it was. Should he deliver it? If he didn't and Tywin found out he could end up in hot water, however if he did he set himself up to be seen as an errand boy. The bloody nerve of the man! And his sickening arrogance that the princess's heart was all but his. Was it all blind confidence or did he have reason to be so assured about his prospects? Surely, Zelda was far too smart to fall for a blaggard like him?
Grrr! He had to resist the compulsion to crush the poem. He wouldn't decide now. He'd wait until tomorrow. One thing he could be sure of was that his indecision had nothing to do with jealousy… Absolutely not!
As his gaze turned to high windows, still rattling under an endless onslaught of rain and wind, he couldn't shake the feel that something bad was on the horizon. Was it his impending punishment or something else entirely?
Only time would tell.