Something You Stole

by ChronicallyEclectic

Link's adventures through the Twilight realm had taught him to expect the unexpected. Unfortunately even that didn't prepare him for the shock of being accused of apparently stealing one of the Princess's most precious possessions! What did he steal? He doesn't know and she wont say. Romance/Drama/Humour. Cover image by Janus3003 on Deviantart

28. Carriagous Convictions

A.N: Hello again, my fabulous readers! Hope you're all safe and well. Here is another long chapter for your reading pleasure. I wanted to release it yesterday but as usual, being the perfectionist I am, there are bits that I wasn't happy with. I'm still not entirely happy with them but I couldn't think of any other way of doing them so here you are.

As always thanks to those who left reviews or feedback. It's always appreciated so please if you have something to say about the story feel free to leave a comment. It helps spur me on!

Now without further ado… on with the story!

Chapter 27 – Carriagous Convictions

Kakariko Village – 279 days A.G

Link huffed and rubbed his calloused fingers across his furrowed brow. Rarely had a day in his memory succeeded in so illuminating and yet simultaneously so dull! It seemed a contradiction yet today had managed it. As the raucous crowd of royal entourage and accompanying nobility trudged down the shadowy gully of Kakariko's main street, back towards the line of waiting coaches preparing to deliver them to Leguna Mansion, there was little for a hero to do but reminisce on today's events.

He'd risen with the dawn for the planned early departure for Kakariko, however said plans were scuppered with the arrival of the two dozen nobles "obligated" to accompany the royal entourage. Within minutes a carnival of confusion and bickering had ignited among these emblems of the civilised social elite. The cause of this commotion? No one could agree whose carriage was whose as everyone was after the ones closest to her highness's or, even better, nab the one free seat in the carriage of her beautiful ladies-in-waiting, the three T's, a prospect that had whipped every eligible bachelor among them into a frenzy.

The bickering was only resolved - albeit with much resentful grumbling – when the, by then, thoroughly peeved princess "suggested" they draw lots for the seating, the results of which proved to be marvellous success, providing equal dissatisfaction for all. The "heartbreak" of the bachelors' dashed hopes of time alone with the Three T's, was only matched by the thinly disguised disgust of the one who "beat them to it". It happened to be none other than a certain newly knighted swordmaiden, who'd bemoaned the prospect of spending the next four hours with "the frills and fancy words brigade!" Given Ashei's unwitting reveal at the library however, he'd predicted she may enjoy their company more than she'd admit. Judging by her poorly concealed smile upon disembarking at Kakariko, he'd say he was right. It was all but proven by her not jumping on the princess's generous offer of a redraw for the journey to Leguna Mansion to anyone unhappy with the seating arrangements, which was just about everyone. Of course, he wasn't about to risk starting off this "vacation" with a vengeful Ashei, so he'd kept quiet, merely giving a sly smirk while she did her best theatrical grumbling to preserve her image.

Vacation huh? He thought about all the word entailed and had to begrudgingly accept Zelda's wisdom being vindicated once again. She'd said a change of scenery would help calm him and after just two hours following the convoy of carriages and coaches at a leisurely canter along the familiar roads towards Kakariko, the persistent vice on his chest loosened and the turmoil of his mind mellowed. Just the sights, scents and sounds of nature… that was enough. He was a country boy at heart and this trip reminded him just how much he'd missed it. These pleasant reminders may have been polluted by the rattling of many wheels, the clopping of many hooves, and regular bursts of bickering drifting up from the noble's carriages but the evocative memories conjured by the vibrant oranges, yellows and reds of autumn; the calls of nuthatch, robin and song thrush; and the smells of damp grass, oak and musk of deer easily drove these disturbances to the back of his mind. How long had it been since he'd ventured outside the hustle and bustle of castle town? Six months? Well, whatever the number it had clearly been far too long.

Was there a twinge of homesickness? He couldn't say. Regardless, Ilia had told him to stay away. Plus, he couldn't simply abandon the princess and bringing her to Ordon definitely wouldn't help heal his old friend's wounds. On the subject of old friends, the stallion he'd borrowed for the trip, while perfectly adequate for the journey and arguable better tempered, could not compare to the company of his hot-headed, yet ever faithful stead. Unfortunately, it was that fiery temperament and picky taste in people which had led to her being left at the castle, as much as it felt like a betrayal. The fact remained, there was no guarantee she'd have approved of any of Leguna Estates stable staff and, while it hadn't happened yet, there was a possibility of him being requested in the royal carriage, meaning Epona would have faced the prospect of a rider other than himself. That wouldn't have ended well.

Old friends may have been left out but he did have a few new friends to pass the four-hour trip with; Borri, Zorran and a dozen more casual acquaintances among the regiment which escorted the convoy. That said, Zorran remained as detached from reality as always and Borri, while a lot more talkative, was also distracted and distant.

Despite the freedom of escape from the castle walls, boredom had set in by the time they reached their destination. A jubilant welcome awaited the princess as the convoy pulled up beside Eldin spring… almost two hours later than planned! There was little sign of this delay dampening the spirits of the crowd of over a hundred that eagerly greeted them. The crowd included all the expected faces; Renado, Luda and Barnes, but also Malo and a sizable number of Gorons.

Once the fanfare of the welcome party died, along with his initial surprise at such an unexpectedly substantial throng for such a small settlement, he had a chance to take in the village itself and all became clear. When Zelda had talked of an expansion project, he hadn't comprehended the staggering metamorphosis which had evidently occurred.

Up the length of the ravine, which formed the focal point of the village, he spied probably twenty to thirty new buildings, some squeezed haphazardly in whatever gaps could be found between existing buildings, others peppering the steep craggy cliffs like barnacles, supported by wooden platforms or in some cases burrowed deep into rock – clearly the handiwork of the Gorons.

It was undeniably impressive, however he couldn't help but feel that, for all that had been gained, much had been lost, namely character and light, the shadows of the new buildings rendering the street below in perpetual gloom. Was this the price of progress?

It turned out he had the next four hours to ponder that question as, after a much belated celebratory feast, criticised be the nobles for not being hot and freshly cooked – flaws for which they themselves were responsible for, with the morning's delays – he had precious little else to occupy him as he traipsed after the royal entourage and assorted nobles on an extensive tour.

Four hours of seemingly endlessly repeating discussions of logistics, economics and social implications of every change, major or minor, that the once quaint village had undergone, the only point he'd really caught was the deliberation of whether it should be reclassified as a town. Others could escape this mind-numbing experience, which the nobles did in droves, however his duty required he stay.

"Yooohooo, Hyrule calling the Royal Shiiiieeeeelddd!" Sang a loud female voice with an unmistakable twang. He rounded on the noise and was met with a familiar violet gaze of mild disapproval. "Sheesh Link! I called you like five times. Quit your daydreaming. You've got work to do. Bet you were dreaming about the Three T's weren't ya, like all those other drooling boys." Was that disgust or… jealousy he could hear pinching at her words? It was hard to tell, particularly given how often Ashei's emotions seemed to intermingle. Either way he wasn't about to rise to it.

"No that wasn't even close to my mind. For your information, I was thinking back on the mind-numbing four-hour tour that I've just had to endure, unlike you."

"Yeah well, that's one of the perks of being just a knight, ya know. You can do what you want."

"So, what did you do while I was having my brain melted down for mortar for the new buildings?"

"Funny you should ask Link. I've been with the gorons who told me all sort of wild stories 'bout you beating them in wrestling, so I thought "why not give it a go?" I mean if a guy of your stature could do it, oh um, no offence but, it couldn't be that hard!..."

Link had to suppress a grin. He knew where this was going. "And?" he asked innocently.

"And?! And?! It wasn't even a contest! They thrashed me every time! Every bloody time! Seriously Link, what's the secret? What's the trick?"

"Trick?! There is no trick. I just overcame it through my sheer unbridled manliness."

"Ha ha… very funny, now ya gonna spill the beans or not?"

"Sorry Ashei, I am sworn to secrecy."

"Grrr…" The swordmaiden glared at him.

He met it with a smile but said nothing

"Come on, spill it!"

"So, what's this work you mentioned?"

"Fiiinnneee, but I will find out sooner or later." She growled, before abruptly stepping back and giving her best - though still rather graceless - attempt at a curtsey "Her Royal Highness requests your presence." She crooned in her best plummy accent, but quickly reverting to her normal voice to mutter "That means I'll be taking your horse. He better be better behaved than Epona or we're gonna have some problems, yeah."

"Hey, don't you go badmouthing my faithful stead!" Link retorted in feigned indignation.

"Bah, you know what I mean. We don't get along. She's far too stubborn, hot-headed…"

"Well, you know… "Two ladies, too alike are rarely friends" as the saying goes."

"Are you comparing me to a horse?"

"No, I'm comparing you to Epona and that's a world of difference… Take it as a compliment." It was true. After all, there were few souls, horse or otherwise, who he could trust more when the chips are down and he hoped she knew that.

The raven haired swordmaiden scuffed her feet and looked away, suddenly bashful. "Yeah, yeah alright, um, no need to get all mushy on me. So anyway, your horse is that one, yeah?"

"Yes, oh but… you were in her ladies-in-waiting's carriage, not the princess's. Are you sure she requested that I actually join her in her carriage, like for the journey, not just for a word before we set off? I thought her carriage was full?"

"Not anymore. One of her advisors has generously left to join the pool and with me out of their carriage you can bet what seat all the man will be dying to snatch up." She shook her head in disapproval and clicked her tongue. "Annnnyyyyway, you got your orders and I've got a stallion to meet and a dumbass for company."

She meant Borri. "I thought he was a smartass?"

"Bah! smartass, dumbass, whatever. He drives me nuts." She scoffed dismissively but again averted her eyes. Was that a blush he spied? As usual it was hard to tell.

Suddenly there was a prickling on his neck and flicked his head to the source. Of course it was her! Zelda was watching him over the bustling nobility from the door of her carriage. She was clearly waiting for him. "Ok then… I'll leave you to your dumbass. Duty calls. See you at the mansion."

"Yeah, see ya."

With that Ashei sloped off towards the horses and Link jostled his way through the crowd to the royal carriage where the princess waited, her veil just thin enough for him to glimpse the subtle amusement playing on her lips. "So, my Royal Shield. Are you sufficiently recovered from your ordeal to join me?"

"Your Highness?" Was the tour the ordeal she was referring to or was it Ashei?

Zelda decided to keep the source of her amusement to herself, teasing an answer with the angular quirk of an eyebrow and upward twitch of her lips, before ignoring the topic entirely. "Come Sir Link, let us not vacillate at the threshold. Board so I can officially introduce you to two of my most trusted allies and friends, though I know one of whom you are already acquainted"

Despite her command, he hesitated on the brink. He'd caught a glimpse into the carriage and felt a little "uncomfortable" at the prospect. It looked like it would be rather, um, cosey, at least when it comes to the proper distance for a hero and a princess! "Er, are you sure this is wise Your Highness, me joining you like this?... you know, particularly with the whole Vanhorn situation?"

"Of course, indeed it would raise more eyebrows for us to remain apart for too long. As far as the rest of the court are concerned you are still my Royal Shield with all the duties, responsibilities and privileges that title carries, and no knowledge of any deal which may change that. I'd like to keep it that way. For the next month any changes to your position or your lack of constant attendance at my side can be explained by the transition period, however the longer we are apart the more people will begin to ask questions."

"Ok, but what about your other advisor, the one whose seat I'm taking? Is he alright with this? I mean, the other nobles haven't reacted too kindly to their choice of company. wont he be joining the draw too?"

"Oh, he will be fine. My intuition tells me his luck will be quite favourable."

What could that mean? Surely, she wasn't suggesting she'd rigged it?! No! She wouldn't do that… would she?

Regardless, he was out of excuses, so he sighed in defeat and boarded the modestly sized yet opulently furnished carriage. As the princess had stated, he'd already met one of the carriages two other occupants and the other he knew well despite never actually having been acquainted. Knowing the two men as he did may have allayed any fears of political ramifications for any faux pas which may result from his closeness to Zelda… but it magnified the awkwardness tenfold.

"Sir Link, allow me to formally introduce you to the Grand General of the army of Hyrule, the long-lost Uncle you returned to me, Alfonzo Codgins Demerara."

Alfonzo gave a hearty chuckle and, just like all those months back at Telma's bar, took Link by surprise with another enthusiastic and utterly unprompted handshake. "Ah, no need for such formality Zelly. Me and Link are already well acquainted. Link, I can't thank you enough for what you did for me agreein' to delivery my letter. If there's anythin' I can do to repay you, do not 'esitate to ask."

"Oh, that's quite alright, errr, Alf. It was nothing, really, the least I could do. I just did what anyone would do."

"Nonsense! Zelly agrees, don't you?"

"Indeed. To you Link, your actions may have seemed trivial, but their impact… their impact cannot be overstated and you… you should not underplay your exceptional capacity for kindness. It may have been as simple as delivering a letter but in doing so you returned to me long lost family and, through me, returned an honourable man to his rightful place…" While her points were technically true, it still felt wrong to him, taking credit for such major consequences of such a minor mundane action. Not to mention that, contrary to what she clearly believed, his seemingly effortless altruism actually came with a fair amount of deliberation and he'd actually considered saying no, for fear of her safety. Still, he couldn't bring himself to argue with her earnestness. Earnestness quickly became mirth however, as her twinkling gaze switched from hero to general and she gave a light cough. "Now with that being said, Uncle, I do believe our illustrious hero would like his hand back."

"Ahhahaha, yes, right. Sorry about that. I do tend to get carried away." Alfonzo chuckled again and mercifully relinquished his vice like grip from the hero's hand.

"No worries." Link tried to brush it off, even as he flexed his fingers to return feeling to the tips. For an old man, Alfonzo was certainly strong in more than just spirit.

"Now, to a man who you have not yet met but whom I have told you much…"

"Only good things I hope." Jibed the Lord reclining languidly next to Alfonzo.

"… Lord Samuel Fairclough, maverick industrialist, opinionated politician, despicable poker player, my most loyal and trusted council member… and a dear friend of both me and my father." Friend? That wasn't the impression he'd got from her tales of him. More of a surrogate father. Then again, she probably couldn't say that… or didn't want to.

Zelda wasn't the only lady to sing his praises, though the others he'd heard were of a rather different variety. Described by many a doe-eyed maid as "the smoothest man in all Hyrule", Fairclough's appearance certainly supported that title. Despite being in his early fifties, nature still gifted him a thick gold mane which, unlike a certain hero's unruly mop, cooperated with comb and the barest trace of a gel to slick it back stylishly. Add to that an absurdly sculpted nose and jawline, a pair of gleaming brown eyes, emanating vitality and wit in abundance and a tall, slender build – well slender by nobleman's standards – and it was easy to see why he had so many female admirers even at his age. Then again, the only signs of said age were a few lines and those were so ill-fitting they almost seemed artificial, as though some jealous rival had snuck in at night and painted them on in his sleep. Even Link had to admit, there was plenty to be jealous about, not least his apparently blissful marriage – a truly rare thing among nobility – to an equally age-defying beauty of a wife. With such heritage, their daughter's good looks and charm were inevitable, though as his heart reminded him, they still could not match the princess.

What sparked Link's jealousy however, along with a shot of self-consciousness, was Fairclough's immaculate hair and straight nose. He wished he still had a straight nose.

Fairclough, oblivious to such musings of envy, chuckled at Zelda's "novel" introduction and held out his hand to the hero for a more relaxed yet no less friendly handshake. "A Pleasure to finally met you in person Sir Link, I too have heard much about you…" He shot the princess a wry smirk "I have to say, my dear, your introduction had me worried for a moment. "Most loyal and trusted council member!?" Really? That's scarcely a difficult title to earn. Half of them are your enemies anyway and the other half are the sort of friends who make you prefer your enemies."

"Hm, a small exaggeration there but I cannot rightly disagree, merely state you are not the only exception to that rule."

"Of course not. Shad has proven himself. Incidentally, how…"

Fairclough stopped mid-question, as the door on Zelda's side was opened and a servant presented a scroll to her. "Ah, thank you…" She unrolled it and cast her eyes briefly over its contents before giving a hum of satisfaction. "Fine results… as to your question, yes the arrangements have all gone through. Now, the draw is complete and we should be off in a matter of minutes. Link, please take a seat."

The princess patted the plush red velvet next to her but Link hesitated. He was about to sit next to Zelda in the presence of her surrogate uncle and the man who was arguably her surrogate father figure, both of whom, according to Zelda's accounts, possessed a protective - some might say overprotective – streak lurking beneath their genial exterior. He recalled the words of Uli, the closest he ever had to a surrogate mother, lecturing him on the importance of making a good impression with a lady's family and…

At this point logic interceded into his mental debate "That's only if you're courting, you idiot!"

"Ahem, Link…" Zelda's voice quickly silenced the riveting mental battle "we will soon be off. No need to stand on ceremony or worries of court etiquette. You sitting with me will not cause a scandal."

Link blushed and bashfully lowered himself into the seat, maintaining a "respectable" distance - enough for a third person - by squashing himself against the window frame.

This display earnt him a chuckle from the general and a tut from the princess. "It is a two-hour trip, and that cannot be a comfortable way to sit. Relax, you are not on show."

Her words were kind but her tone held a veiled threat of "Don't make me order you." so, despite his continued reservations, he hastily closed the gap to half a man's space between them. This met with an approving nod and a smile, though he didn't miss the not-so-subtle rolling of the eyes as she turned her attention back to Lord Fairclough. "So, I take it there will be no elaborate farewell ceremony? Not that I'm complaining, as they have already shown much hospitality for my visit and I would not wish to keep them unduly from their lives and livelihoods."

"Oh, I wouldn't say there'll be no farewell ceremony, your highness." The Lord replied, donning an enigmatic smirk.

The Bugle signalling the royal convoys departure sounded and the carriages began to rattle and roll, though the ride was deceptively smooth. Not knowing the way to Leguna Mansion, it was with some surprise that the convoy turned onto Kakariko main street, parading single file along a stream of liquid gold provided by the sun peaking over the far end of the ravine. As the convoy rolled on, he glanced up to see the villagers, young and old, Human and Goron, all gathered on the parapets, silently watching their departure.

Then, without warning… they began to sing. With the shrill uneven trilling of children clashing with the gruff growling drone of the gorons it could scarcely be described as elegant. Yet the delivery was passionate and from their union came a sound encapsulating a strangely moving beauty within its imperfection, enough to raise the hairs on the back of his neck. He knew neither the tune or the words yet it carried a warm and comforting nostalgia to it. All he could do was sink back into his seat, close his eyes and absorb it.

Then he began to make out some of the lyrics and his stomach tried its best to lurch, despite the comfortable ride. It was about the princess… and her hero! Self-doubt and thoughts of unworthiness inevitably boiled up… and yet they didn't break the spell of the song. No, there was something in the way of such negativity… a small twinge of pride, a feeling so rare he couldn't be sure he was right in identifying it. Nevertheless, it remained and he found himself willing it to stay. Surely, he deserved some credit for his achievements?

He looked to Zelda who, sensing his focus, turned and gave him a warm smile. In that one simple gesture it was as though she had offered vindication, permission to accept this small but precious gift. He returned her smile with one of his own, grateful, though tainted with a faint stain of melancholia.

The music continued but the rest of their surroundings melted away. It was just him and the princess, sharing a moment of the deepest calm he could recall. he gazed into her and she gazed into him.

Time stood still…

BANG! BANG!

The moment was shattered by the sudden pounding of several heavy objects striking the roof of the carriage and the horses began whinnying in distress. As the carriage jolted, Link bolted up and went for his weapon, only for his arm to be restrained by Lord Fairclough. "Don't! They're just trouble makers. It's not worth it."

The singing continued, though the passion had faltered and through it came the sound of scuffling and shouting, mostly indecipherable but a single united chant made it through the din. "WE KNOW THE TRUTH! WE KNOW WHAT YOU DID!" An accusation, brimming with bitterness and anger, spat with venom by roughly a dozen voices.

The disruption was brief and the dissenting chant was quickly silenced but the damage had been done. The shaken hero reluctantly slumped back into his seat, his heart racing, any semblance of the brief serenity he'd glimpsed with Zelda buried in an instant. Glancing round, it looked like the assault had rattled everyone.

All the passengers remained silent until they rounded the bend, leaving Kakariko behind, at which point, pre-empting the obvious questioning, the suddenly sombre blonde noble spoke. "I'm sorry, Zelda. I had hoped to avoid such an incident."

"Who were they?" She asked, remarkably placid in the aftermath of such an attack.

"I wasn't lying when I stated that most of the refugees had settled in without issue. There is, however, a small minority… who don't believe the twilight invasion happened, that it was…"

"What?!" Link exploded incredulously. "Who the fff…" Even with his blood jumping from frozen to boiling in a matter of seconds, he was just aware enough to prevent such vulgarity escaping his lips in front of the princess. After a deep breath, he tried again, voice still shaking with anger. "who are these refugees and where did they come from?" He'd heard many mentions of refugees on the tour, but their origins were left unexplained.

Fairclough cleared his throat. "Apologies Sir Link. Given the refugees have been a long-standing matter of discussion for the council, it slipped my mind that you wouldn't know. The refugees come from "the hinterlands", a stretch of land to the north west, bordering the Gerudo desert to the south west, with the kingdoms of Moragalea and Essen to the north…"

"Aaaah, good ol' Moragalea and Essen, the worst of allies. Passing the buck since time immemorial." Alfonzo interjected drolly.

"Well technically…" Zelda jumped in "while the hinterlands are officially part of Moragalea, the territory is disputed with both Hyrule and Essen having claims on the land."

"Doesn't mean we 'ave to bail 'em out every time a crisis occurs." He countered with unexpectedly callous dismissal. There was a sudden chill in the air and Zelda's visage beheld an expression of unmistakable disappointment as she regarded her "uncle". The instant he registered her dismay, he withered with shame and remorse. "I'm terribly sorry Zelda, It's just… after the events of…"

"Do not mention that!" Zelda snapped with sudden uncharacteristic ferocity, which quickly turned to contrition of her own. She bit her lip and averted her eyes to the window. After a painful silence she finally murmured "I understand… I… understand… after what you must have gone through, I can scarcely imagine… but I ask you, please… keep it in the past."

"Of… of course Zelda… I'm sorry."

There was a heavy sigh from both sides and Fairclough hastily stepped in to move the subject on, even as Link was left trying to process the full implications of what he'd just witnessed. Clearly, whatever Alfonzo brought up was an open wound for Zelda, but what was it? Nevertheless, he kept his mouth shut as Fairclough sought to bring the conversation back to his original question of the refugees.

"Ahem, as I was saying Link, the refugees came from the Hinterlands which, as Zelda pointed out, are disputed territory. It does officially belong to Moragalea, however Hyrule does have a claim to the area and some of its population were once our citizens. Given that, along with the fact the land is of poor quality, of little strategic significance and that the cause of the crisis occurred in ourterritory, it is entirely to be expected from a dispassionate political perspective that Moragalea would "pass the buck" to us."

"Ok, but what was the crisis?"

"Contrary to popular belief, the waters of Zora spring and Lake Hylia are not sacred waters reserved for Hyrule alone, nor are they our only reliable water source. The Hinterlands, however, aren't so lucky. Being that they border the Gerudo desert, they are a hot and inhospitable land, not barren but hardly the best country for a population primarily comprised of farmers. Their only salvation, their one reliable source of water… was a tributary from Zora Spring…"

Link's blood chilled. He could already see where this was going. "Now of course, you know what happened at the Zora Spring even better than I do during the twilight invasion, so I'm sure you can piece it together already but… the freezing of the spring led to months of drought which ruined the harvest. That, however, was just the start. With the extended period of drought, the soil became so dry and hard that it no longer took in water. When Zora Spring thawed and the tributary flowed again, without the soil to dissipate it, the river burst its banks and what was once farm land was turned into a giant flood plain. Fortunately, given that such floods were not unheard of, the Hinterland's citizens built all their dwells raised on stilts so they were undamaged. The extent of the flooding though was unprecedented and the soil was so damaged that, even with the assistance of Lord Shad's revolutionary new irrigation and agricultural techniques, it could be a decade before the ground is fit to farm again…" A decade?! "Facing famine, the inhabitants had no choice but to find a new home, hence the refugee issue we found ourselves in following the end of the Twilight invasion. We simply hope that with the success of this expansion and others…"

Fairclough's words faded from his consciousness as he took in the full implications of what had just been explained to him. A decade without a true home! The expansion program may have provided a shelter but, on the tour, he'd seen them for what they were: rough and ready shacks; cramped, lifeless and providing nothing more than the most basic of necessities. What had these people left behind?

Time, on his adventures, had become an enigmatic poltergeist, often haunting and rattling him but rarely coming into focus. It had been roughly six months but what had those six months cost? If he took out all those detours, those small errands of kindness for individuals, all those times he'd stopped to indulge the urge for sleep, the "need' for food… if he took all that and cast it away, how much time would have been saved? How many lives and livelihoods would it have saved?

Would there even be a refugee crisis now if he'd just ignored his exhaustion for a few more hours each day, ignored the rumblings of his stomach and silenced his curiosity? True, curiosity had gifted him with vital discoveries and advantages on occasion! True, his exhaustion and hunger had already been sufficient to lead to more than a few uncomfortably close calls and near-death mistakes! But surely, if he truly was a divinely chosen hero, he should have been able to manage?

The all too familiar dagger of shame and regret pierced his gut. He thought he'd be used to its searing sting by now but with each new victim he discovered it renewed itself with a deeper slice, and he'd just discovered a whole community of them. To think that a few minutes ago that very community had been literally singing his praises and what's more… he'd been selfish enough to accept them with pride! Some hero he was! Some relaxing vacation this was turning…

"Link?" There was a gentle hand on his should and, raising his gaze from the floor, he met his princess's sapphire blues brimming with compassion and concern. Her tone was questioning yet somehow with just her eyes he could practically hear her unspoken appeal "Do not blame yourself…" How could she know? Well, his hung head may have been a clue but still… her ability to read him was as disconcerting as it could be comforting. Or perhaps he was the one reading too much in an expression. Regardless, the appeal, whether real or imagined spoke of a notion he'd struggled to accept ever since his first chance to reflect on his adventures and her eyes, no matter how "appealing" weren't about to break the stalemate in his mind. Whether he took the blame or not… that was down to him alone.

Nevertheless, from the silence and the three people all gazing at him with bemusement or concern, it would seem his private ruminations had stirred the public attention of all his travel companions. Time to change that. "I'm fine, I'm fine. Sorry, something you said just got me thinking and I lost track. So, err, what did I miss?"

Arched brows screamed the princess hadn't bought his "I'm fine" act in the slightest but she mercifully chose not to pursue it… at least not with their current company. "Ahem, well this will probably be of little interest to you but we had just begun discussing the economic implications of the expansion."

"Wait, what? What about those troublemakers?"

The princess's attention returned to Lord Fairclough. "I must admit, your attempts to sidestep the matter did not go unnoticed by me either…" she remarked pensively "Is this really such a vexatious issue that you would keep it from me, of all people?"

"No, my dear. I just didn't want to upset you."

"Please, I am not the fragile girl I once was. Besides, from your hesitation I suspect I already know the reason. They blame me, do they not?"

What!? How could they possibly blame her? Link ground his teeth, sympathy and guilt quickly waning in the face of rising resentment.

"Well, not you specifically but yes. They believe we deliberately engineered the drought and subsequent flood to devalue the land, in preparation for a future land grab. Ironically our willingness to help only compounds their suspicion, particularly Shad's new irrigation and agricultural methods to accelerate land recovery. To them, it seems all too convenient for us to know and freely offer such knowledge in the wake of their plight."

His jaw unclenched. He could sort of see their viewpoint but understanding did not extinguish his anger, merely dampen it.

Zelda was solemn but otherwise unphased. "Hmm, a regrettable outcome but not an unforeseen one. What has been their impact?"

"Apart from the display you witnessed earlier? A few altercations, mostly minor, particularly with the Gorons. The main effect has been to exacerbate the strain these recent events have taken on the relations between the two communities. The Gorons are a proud people with a deep reverence for their dead. The denial of the twilight invasion is seen as a great insult to those they lost to it."

"Indeed. We can but pray matters do not escalate. Do you have any solutions?"

The blonde noble suddenly appeared conflicted, an answer seemingly hanging on the tip of his tongue, which was glimpsed but never voiced, as his lips repeated parted only to reluctantly perse once more. Eventually, after much deliberation and displaying great reticence he replied with surprising formality. "None you would deem acceptable, your highness."

Tension seeped into the air as the conversation promptly snapped and the only sounds left were rattling wheels and clattering hooves. Both sides clearly possessed words they were conflicted on expressing, instead exchanging a long meaningful stare. Such words however would remain an enigma to Link, as Zelda finally broke the silence to blatantly change the subject. "Ahem, so you were about to apprise me of the projects economic situation, were you not?"

Fairclough barely batted an eye, dropping into breezy nonchalance as though the last conversation and subsequent silence never occurred. "Oh, of course, my dear. With regards to the financial…"

What had just happened? He could understand Zelda being upset at being unfairly blamed for something beyond her control, but that had barely scratched her composure. It was something in the prospect of a solution which had cracked it and, judging by her hasty retreat from the matter, pierced deep into something… painful… or angry. But what? From Fairclough's cautious, considered response and his immediate, unquestioning concession to her change of subject, it was clear he knew the answer and obviously sympathised with her. It was also obvious, however, that for all his sympathy, he didn't agree with her reasoning and his concession was born purely out of respect – or "fatherly" love – for her.

So, what had been those "unacceptable" solutions that caused such reticence and tension? Only two solutions sprung to mind, both severe but, to him at least, not uncalled for… if things got worse. They could arrest them or expel them. Zelda may be a beacon of compassion but even she didn't display any objection to the castle town guards arresting troublemakers, so how would this be any different? As for expulsion, well, if these people were going to spit in the faces of those trying to help them, then, harsh as it sounded… why not kick them out? These people may believe Hyrule was to blame for their hardship – and on some level, he might be – but that's no reason to spread their suffering to everyone else. He could fully understand Zelda preferring a more pacifist approach of talking them down, but in this case, it sounded extraordinarily unlikely any such appeal would succeed. Some people just can't be talked down. Surely Zelda understood this? Surely…

He was pulled from his ponderings by a not-so-subtle gesture head jab in his direction from the blonde noble, busy continuing his conversation with Zelda, words laced with wry amusement. "… Of course, the likes of Vanhorn and Reefa will put the blame on his influence for your ignorance of the financial implications of such an event…" Ok, what had he missed?! "Indeed, given the commemoration will inevitably feature many celebrations of his heroic achievements, I can see them going so far as to fan the rumours that the princess is "unduly" infatuated with her chosen hero." Infatuated?! Ok, now was the worst time to enter the conversation!

"Infatuated?!" he blurted gormlessly. His three companions all rounded on him and his face burst into flame. His companions in turn promptly burst out laughing, blasting away the tension that had pervaded their recent conversations. He could almost consider his blunder a beneficial one just to hear the princess's laugh and see her unveiled smile. It was just a pity it cost his self-respect to witness it.

"Um, er, um, sorry, I could… could have sworn you were talking about economics. Um, er, what did I miss?" he stammered, desperately trying to retrieve some scrap of dignity. This didn't help matters much.

"Boy, you sure picked a moment to wake up 'ero." Alfonzo chortled, cheeks rosy with mirth, unlike the hero's soul-searing embarrassment.

Zelda dabbed her eyes with a handkerchief and endeavoured to compose herself. "I am sorry Link. I know too well the … anaesthetic effects economics can have on the uni… uninitiated. Sam and… Ahem, Lord Fairclough and I were just discussing the anniversary commemorations of the end of the twilight invasion and the council's "reservations" on account of the expenses involved. As you are aware, certain members of the council like to undermine any "unwise" decisions I make with claims that I am being "inappropriately influenced". Fortunately, they either lack Fairclough's sense of humour or have learnt from Lord Halshaw the foolishness in attempting to legitimise rumours of our "mutual infatuation". Pure nonsense of course, fuelled purely by bard's tales and people's desire for fairy tale endings."

"Ouch!" Winced Link's heart. 'Shut up!" snapped his head. "Hhahaha" chuckled his mouth… awkwardly. "Yeah, ridiculous."

Fairclough came to the rescue with a warning wag of his finger to the princess. "Be careful not to tempt fate Zelda. The council may not necessarily pay for baseless rumours about your "illicit romantic associations" but they'll certainly try to use your real romantic prospects to foot the bill and secure "the kingdom's" coffers. With your recent spate of "unwise decisions" they'll be even more intent on ensuring a hasty union with one of your suitors: the illustrious Grand Duke Tywin being top of their list; purely because he's the perfect match to your intellect, wit and conscience, of course; and absolutely not motivated by the significant financial investment, trade agreement opportunities and political leverage they would receive as a result…" As usual the mention of suitors set a simmering broth of ire in his stomach – it absolutely wasn't jealousy! – but it wasn't enough to distract him from the conversation. "… Coincidentally, who's been granted the pleasure of the Duke's inimitable presence for this fine journey?"

"Why not take a look for yourself. I believe you will find several of the results quite… amusing." Zelda handed Fairclough the scroll and it took very little time perusing its contents before the chuckling began. Alfonzo leant across and soon joined the mirth, while Zelda simply smiled a sweet innocent smile, which didn't quite match her twinkling eyes.

"hmhmhm, oh the Hargreaves with the Bastaphorns… the Brookleafs and the Colberts… Ah and Tywin has the pleasure of… the Halshaws, sans Julius, the Vanhorns and the Greenes… a frightful combination. My dear, is there any among your court you haven't stitched up?"

"Stitched up? I can assure you they are all they are all simply the unfortunate victims of fate."

"Come on Zelly, ya really expect us to buy all these match ups as mere bad luck? I mean, The 'argreaves and the Bastaphorns? After the two milks incident ya can't seriously…"

"The "two milks" incident?" Princess and surrogate father questioned in unison before the latter seemingly had an epiphany "Ah, I'm assuming you mean the one with the cat impressions and the… you know… the…" He made a vague yet suggestive gesture with his hands and Alfonzo nodded. "… ahem, no wonder you didn't know, My dear. It was rather before your time and, frankly, not for the ears of a princess."

This, of course, only exacerbated the princess's curiosity. "What?! But I want to know."

"No, It's too depraved…"

"But Saaaam…" Zelda whined, summoning forth a face and tone Link had never witnessed before, nor ever imagined he'd witness from the princess. She delivered an utterly devastating puppy-dog pout which would have broken him immediately were he the target.

Sam, however, had clearly developed an immunity to such displays and remaining stoically adamant. "No. Trust me, you are better off not knowing."

"Ah come on Samuel, it ain't that bad and Zelly's all grown up now… Plus, you gotta admit, it's quite the tale, 'e'e'e." Alfonzo chimed in, waggling his wiry grey brows.

"No, you know I'm no prude but that is too far… and don't you go telling her either!"

"Ok, sure." Alfonzo drawled before giving Zelda a sly wink which she returned.

"Don't you dare!"

"What?" Princess and surrogate uncle replied in unified "innocence".

"I saw that wink." Samuel snapped sternly, though the groan which followed seemed to signal underlying resignation, as if he knew his warnings were ultimately in vain.

Link didn't pitch in, preferring to silently marvel at the blatant family dynamic on display, proving all his suspicions about them; The supportive but protective father vs the mischievous uncle.

"Anyway, I can still count a dozen reasons the 'argreaves and Bastaphorns go about as well together as cats and dogs, such as…" With Alfonzo launching into a list of events about people he barely knew, only for the three to all share in memories and jokes he neither knew nor understood, Link felt himself being wrenched from the group. The distance between himself and his princess began to stretch with each term or reminiscence they passed so easily yet escaped his understanding. This distance was certainly not deliberate, as demonstrated by the many lifelines they threw him to try and save him from his floundering engagement. Such efforts proved less than fruitless, only serving to draw attention to the gulf in their experiences and knowledge.

In the end, to avoid the escalating feelings of being a burden on the conversation, he signed his surrender by asking to look at the scroll "er, mind if I take a look?" he mumbled.

"Oh, of course." Fairclough passed him the scroll and he finally felt relief at having the excuse to leave the conversation. Nevertheless, he briefly caught a glance from Zelda that could have been a look of apology. It wasn't her fault though. If anything, it was his. Had he been a dutiful student during her political and court related lectures he may have been able to follow it.

Oh well, time to gaze at a bunch of names of people, most of whom he'd never met and possessed knowledge ranging from sketchy at best to non-existent at worst. He unrolled the scroll and cast his eyes across it. The names were laid out by coach and row from the front of the convey down the parchment to the back where the royal carriage languished somewhere off the bottom of the page. Not that it needed to be included as it wasn't part of the seating draw but it got him pondering again why the royal entourage was at the back. Surely it should be at the front? Then again it was probably safer at the back.

He took in the names for what little they meant. There were the Hargreaves; Lord Sigi Hargreaves, Lady Patricia Hargreaves and Sir Valious, presumably their son. Opposite them the Bastaphorns, numbering five, followed; by assorted Reefa family, Lord and Lady Herkle and on and on…

The only things which caught his interest as his gaze raked down the parchment were the names of several of Zelda's suitors, all of which Link could miraculously recall –and that had absolutely nothing to do with jealousy! – and the fact that Lord Julius Halshaw was indeed separate from his wife and son. Was this the luck of the draw… or was it deliberate? Most of the other families were all together.

All that was left was to see who'd been chosen as the three T's lucky companion/unlucky victim. There they were at the bottom; Terra, Tasmin, Tamara and… and…

Link's eyes almost popped clean out of their sockets and his face turned whiter than the scroll as he read the name just one more time to make sure he hadn't imagined it. He hadn't!

He bolted upright and flung the door open, accompanied by a gasp of shock from behind and sudden rush of cool early-evening breeze. One leg swung out into the open air, preparing to alight from the still moving carriage, when Zelda's gloved hand grasped his shoulder. "Link, what are you doing!?"

"I have to rescue Shad!" he blurted.

"Rescue Shad? From what?" Came her confused reply. He whirled round to stare at her incredulously. From what?! Surely the answer was obvious. She'd seen the scroll! She knew how Shad was and whose company he'd been trapped with for the last, goddess knows how long! They were her ladies-in-waiting, after all. Surely she wasn't completely oblivious to their "depraved" tastes and what they were capable of! Then again, she hadn't batted an eye on seeing the scroll and the results so perhaps she truly didn't know about their penchant for "teasing" the shy and the innocent. Bad as that was by itself, Shad's situation was infinitely more dire. Despite repeated warnings, Shad's infatuation with Tamara still burned strong even though he had mercifully heeded Link's advice to stay away. Now all those efforts were in vain as he was now trapped not only with three vivacious beauties but one of them being his heart's captor. With a set up like that, there were just two ways his journey could possibly end; heart break or heart attack!

He was about to explain – at least the teasing part - when Samuel butted in, seemingly just as confused as Zelda. "Rescue Shad? What in Hyrule could he possibly need to be…" Suddenly his eyes narrowed ominously. "Link, I trust you are not suggesting anything, ahem, "improper" about my daughters?" He rumbled darkly.

Shit! If Fairclough was protective of his surrogate daughter, what wrath awaited if he insulted his blood daughters? A level of tact was clearly required here. "Oh, um, err, not at all. It's simply that, well, I'm sure you know Shad's a shy guy, um, particularly around beautiful girls, and your daughters are beautiful and, um, err, energetic…" The father's mouth twitched and not in an approving way. "… That is to say, um, bubbly, err, friendly to a… a degree a shy guy like Shad could find, um, overwhelming." The fathers mouth softened. It looked like he'd successfully talked himself out of witnessing a father's protective wrath.

Unfortunately, he hadn't talked Shad out of experiencing the "wrath" of the three flirtatious daughters. "Overwhelming it may be but he is certainly in no need of rescue. He is a grown man and my daughters are all refined young ladies of impeccable decorum. they know where the lines are." Yes, and they like nothing more than to cross them, especially in the hunt for the reddest face in all of Hyrule. How someone as intelligent as Lord Fairclough had seemingly managed to miss the rampant rumours surrounding his daughters was frankly baffling. Perhaps his three charming offspring had him so wrapped around their finger – a surprisingly common affliction of fathers cursed with daughters - that he simply dismissed all such gossip as untrue.

The final nail in the coffin for Shad's heart was hammered by Zelda, who chimed in with an uncharacteristic compassionless reply, disregarding the plight of shy men everywhere with the manner of one dismissing trivial grumbles about light drizzle. Well Link knew one thing for damn sure: to a chronically shy guy like Shad, a trio like Tamara, Tasmin and Terra were anything but a light drizzle. They were a hurricane in a cage… or in this case a carriage he was trapped in. Not so, according to the wise and completely unbiased princess.

"Oh Link, do not exaggerate. My Ladies-In-Waiting are the smartest, sweetest, most hospitable ladies Shad could ever meet. I'm sure they give him the warmest of receptions…" Yes, and that's the problem! "… and if Shad really is as shy as you believe then all the more reason for him to share their company. After all, one can only rise above their fears by facing them. Besides I believe you underestimate Shad. A little peril may do him good." A little peril! He wasn't the one guilty of underestimation… and perhaps that wasn't the only thing she was guilty of. Perhaps Alfonzo's jibe about rigging was even more apt than he'd realised, an implication supported by the smirk that currently plastered the old man's lips, as he silently observed from the side-lines. It would be a tough enough battle were Zelda innocent but if she really had somehow conspired to engineer this nightmarish scenario – nightmarish for Shad at least – then all hope was lost. Heroic heart protested her innocence but head wasn't so convinced.

Regardless of the verdict, he inevitably conceded and slumped back into his seat, making a silent prayer to Farore that Shad receive some semblance of mercy. He doubted it would be heard though. What tortures that poor man would endure, he shuddered to think.

Fairclough, seemingly happy the matter was settled, turned back to the princess and cleared his throat. "Now My Dear, speaking of doing one good, given your unceasing selfless service in these most gruelling of times, it would be grossly negligent as your host not to offer you as many diversions as possible. My estate, grounds and staff are all at your service… What do you wish? Oh, and know that if you refuse to take a single one, I will take it as a grievous personal insult." He finished with feigned haughtiness.

She gave a rueful smile. "Thank you… I, however, am not the only one requires diversion. I have a few ideas in mind but I believe, particularly given that his role as royal shield will require he accompany me on said diversions, the hero deserves a say too."

"Naturally…" The Lord agreed and turned expectantly to the hero, who was still somewhat preoccupied with the fate of a certain friend in peril. "Link, any suggestions?"

Link blinked. Any suggestions? "Um, I don't know. I've never been to your estate."

"Of course! how inconsiderate of me. You strike me as an outdoors' man and my estates have substantial grounds with expansive fields, woodlands, a modest river, good for boating or fishing… oh, and a natural hot spring…" the mention of fishing briefly caught his attention however the natural hot spring quickly stole it, in the worst way possible. Having spent the last few minutes dwelling on what torturous indecencies Shad was surely suffering at the hands of those three sirens, his mind was not in a suitable frame for such steamy topics as hot springs… especially when his heart reminded him "of course, whatever you choose, you'll be sharing with Zelda."

He may never have seen Zelda naked – and never will – but that didn't stop the mere thought of it almost had him producing steam of his own. Before that filthy dank corner of his brain had the chance to delve any deeper into such shameful material, he hastily chivvied the conversation along to distract himself. "Ahem, well yeah, I'd be interested in exploring and, um, I do like a bit of fishing but, er, um, I'm guessing you had more in mind for diversion than simply exploring?"

"Certainly. The woods are prime hunting grounds…" at the mention of hunting grounds Zelda clicked her tongue sharply, her nose wrinkling in disgust "and the fields are perfect for a variety of activities and sports; ride, archery, fencing, jousting, gameball, stoolball and many others. Who knows, perhaps there is a traditional Ordonian game you would like to share. In the event of poor weather or If you simply desire a more sedate pace the estate also has an extensive library and, of course, games such as cards or, a personal favourite of Zelda's, chess."

The princess's eyes gleamed. "Indeed. Link, would you care for a game some time?"

How many times had his cheeks stained some shade of red on this trip? "Um, sure." He mumbled rubbing his neck awkwardly.

"Well, that should be a game for the ages. The sharp stalwart hero versus the wise indefatigable princess. You'll be one of the few opponents to give her a run for her rupees."

Really? This "sharp stalwart hero" was sceptical. "What makes you say that?"

"Well, as the hero of Hyrule, given the breadth and scale of your accomplishments you must possess not just physical prowess but a great strategic mind."

He couldn't really agree with that but regardless... "You do know that good real-world strategy doesn't translate to being good at chess, right?"

"Aye, and don't I know it." Alfonzo quipped drolly.

Fairclough chuckled "Indeed, indeed, though frankly my friend it boggles the mind the level of disparity between the two in your case. Anyway, Link, I doubt you'll wish to spend the whole week playing chess, so what would you like?"

"Um, well… some riding… fishing… archery… perhaps a little time just exploring?"

"And what about her royal highness?"

"I will leave the fishing to you gentlemen, but the rest would be a delightful change of pace. How about we start with some horse riding, perhaps a race or two and while riding, Link can get acquainted with the estate grounds."

"Splendid, I will the arrangements for tomorrow. Do you…" A bugle blared a fanfare and the carriages rocked to a halt. "Ah, we've arrived."

Link's eyes shot to the far window, only now realising he'd barely spared a glance outside their lavish wooden box since they left Kakariko. It appeared they had pulled up next to a grand three-story mansion of white stone and though the window only offered a glimpse, it was clear the building was impressive in both size and sophistication. Looking out the window on his side revealed the idyllic surroundings. A long, carefully manicured grassy field, flanked by trees, climbed up a slowly tapering valley towards woodland, behind which a dramatic rocky escarpment ascended to the sky where it hid the setting sun, whose deep orange light formed a halo on its peak. From the high cliff several small waterfalls skipped down the steep craggy slope and disappeared behind the treeline. As the carriage door was opened, despite the creaking and slamming of many coach doors, the chatter of many voices and the crunch of feet and hooves on gravel, he could still catch, carried on the evening breeze, the dusk chorus of many birds, the rustle of trees and the exuberant burble of a nearby river or stream.

Fairclough rose to his feet and gave a bow. "Welcome back to the Leguna Estate, your highness…" He stepped down from the carriage, turned and held out his hand.

"Oh thank you, Lord Fairclough, however I wish to take a moment to discuss a personal matter with Sir Link."

The noble nodded, dropping his hand and giving a wry smile. "Very well, your highness. Then I'll leave you in his care. Grand General Alfonzo, welcome back once again, It hasn't been the same without you. Sir Link, this may be your first time but I hope you settle quickly and enjoy your stay. Now if you'll excuse me, as host, it is my forced obliga… oh I mean pleasure to greet this carnival of court clowns… oh, I mean esteemed guests."

As he slipped away, Alfonzo rose from his seat and gave a bow of his own, rather less refined and reverent but holding an impish warmth. "Well then Zelly, if you've somethin' to discuss with 'ero boy 'ere, I wont keep you, but I just wanted to say…" Wait, was that a tear in the old uncle's eye? He suddenly reached a hand out to clasp one of hers. "It's so so good to be 'ere again… with you… it'll be just like old times… just like old times…" Zelda squeezed his hand but her smile faltered, suddenly tainted with melancholy.

"Well not quiet like old times but I pray they will prove just as joyful and exciting." She replied gently.

The general turned to 'ero boy and grasped his hand in another of his familiarly overzealous handshakes. "Thanks again Sir Link. I will never be able to repay you for all you've done for me… and for Zelly…" He leant in and whispered "Now you take good care of her, ya 'ear me."

With that he bowed once more and alighted from the carriage. It was just the hero and the princess now.

"He really has changed…" Came a soft murmur from the princess, barely audible above the bustling cacophony outside.

"Hmmm?"

"Oh, oh nothing, nothing… Link, could you close the door please." Zelda whispered, suddenly slightly on edge.

"Of course." Link hurriedly obliged and the princess seemed to relax.

That didn't stop her from leaning in rather closer than propriety, or the hero's nerves, deemed appropriate and talking in a low conspiratorial whisper. "I have something special planned for tomorrow, which will mean we will spend most of the day together. Now, back to our earlier discussion regarding Vanhorn's deal, while we can certainly exploit your transition period, we will still need to be careful not to overexploit it. We cannot risk provoking him, at least not until we possess a sufficiently political bombshell of our own. Therefore, I think it best that, outside of official orders, we do not associate ourselves further until tomorrow. We may have some room to manoeuvre but prudence is key."

"Ok, I understand that but there are a couple of things. Firstly, if we're waiting for a political bombshell, why didn't you just ask Alfonzo during the ride here?"

"Because I wish to handle this discretely and that means involving as few people as possible. I will ask him but in private."

"But I thought you trusted Samuel?"

"Oh, I do, implicitly, however if he were to hear of this he would doubtless worry terribly and inevitably feel compelled to lecture me on my recklessness and make me promise to be more careful. I hate breaking my promises… especially to him."

He knew exactly how that felt! Then again, this made her something of hypocrite, forcing him into similar promises he couldn't keep. He wasn't about to start an argument over it though. "Alright, I get that, but if you're trying to be discrete, was it wise to discuss even half the stuff we did on the journey, let alone in such a casual manner. I mean, surely if someone heard us…"

"Link, are you forgetting this?" Zelda miraculously produced a keepsake, out of goddesses' knew where – It wasn't as if her dress had pockets.

Ok, that made sense… but… "but then why the need to shut the door?"

"Because it would draw attention, us clearly visibly talking with nothing to block the sound and yet our voices are not heard. Some of the court already suspect I use some kind of magic to keep them from eavesdropping but I do not believe any has ever been able to confirm it. I would prefer to keep it that way…" Again, a logical answer but then, if she has the keepsake, did she really need to get so close and whisper? His heart was having a fit. "… Now, I think it prudent to vacate the carriage lest we attract suspicion. Besides, I am sure you wish to check Shad is not traumatised by the horror of sharing a carriage with three beautiful ladies."

Link rolled his eyes. For a lady of such renowned compassion and empathy, she sure spared precious little for the plight of shy men. Oh well, time to go. After a mutual exchange of bows and nods, he hopped down from the carriage and was about to set off for to find Shad when something stopped him. Lord Fairclough had offered Zelda a hand. Was this standard etiquette for a man to offer his hand to a lady to help her out of her carriage? He glanced down the line of coaches and saw several nobles doing so for their wives… but they were married or, at the very least, courting. On the other hand, Fairclough certainly wasn't courting the princess and yet he did it. Then again, perhaps that was a rule as the host. What was the rule for a royal shield and his princess? Oh, he wished he knew.

If this was only for courting couples and he did it, he risked creating gossip or far worse antagonising the court, but if is an expected sign of respect to all ladies then he risked being branded as disrespectful to his ward and sovereign, not a good start for a freshly minted royal shield.

Then in a stunning turn of events his heart chipped in with a not entirely awful argument. "Hey, you know your duty is to aid her right, and that's a pretty long drop." Well, he supposed there could be a…

"My, Sir Link, you really are a gentleman." Zelda's dulcet chime stirred him from his deliberations only to discover that, while his mind was still conflicted, his body had already chosen. His hand was presented and the princess beheld her classic veiled smile. She sounded happy and, on the surface, she appeared pleased, but the veil could hide many things.

Oh well, at least he had the excuse of saving her from the high step…

A flash of red whipped round the corner and ducked beneath his protruding limb. "I'm dreadfully sorry, your highness, I didn't know when… you… were…" Stammered the anxious servant, depositing a stool beneath the step before faltering, seemingly in a state of shock as his gaze bounced back and forth between the hero and the princess. It certainly wasn't the reaction of a man witnessing normal expected courtly etiquette. He knew it! His heart had damned him yet again!

His alibi was gone. Abort now!

He tried to relinquish his hand but it was too late. Zelda's delicate satin clad fingertips brushed his open palm and he braced himself for the inevitable lightning strike. The heart stopping zap he expected, however, never arrived. Instead, a gentle warming tingle danced up his arm, a welcome relief from the cold autumn evening air. By the time the princess had descended from on high, her dainty digits had been willingly embraced by his own work-worn fingers. That was until her soft shoes crunched on the gravel, waking him to the realisation of his improper actions. His limb instantly turned limp as a stone stunned salmon and fell to his side.

Zelda barely batted an eye, merely offering a reverent subtle nod and a polite "Until tomorrow, Sir Link." before floating away towards the mansion. Link just stood, mouth slightly agape in confusion, watching her ever-elegant form departing the cool coachway for the inviting glow of the mansion. He wasn't the only one struggling with befuddlement. The servant was still gawping at him.

"What?! What are you staring at?" He snapped.

"Oh nothing, a thousand apologies sir." The servant squeaked, retrieving the stool before giving a quick bow and bidding an equally hasty retreat. Hang on, that accent… strange, meandering and vaguely incomprehensible… why did it ring a bell, not an alarm bell but just a ring of familiarity. Who did that remind him of and why? He scowled perplexedly at the servants retreating figure. Why did the accent inspire… no, apprehension was the wrong word for it… a gnawing irritation best described it?

"Excuse me, Sir… Sir… You need to get up Sir. The coaches are about to be retired for the even… ing, err, Sir are you alright." Another servant brought him from his ponderings and whirled around. The servant wasn't addressing him though, but someone still sitting in the carriage in front… it had to be Shad and from the servants increasingly distressed appeals for response it would seem his worst fears had been realised.

He dashed to the open carriage so fast he startled the already near panicked servant, who almost tumbled from the step. Looking past him into the carriage, he was somewhat relieved to find that his friend was miraculously still alive, as was made blatantly obviously by the heavy breathing and a heart pounding faster than Epona in full gallop. It was still a "chilling" scene. Shad was frozen in his seat, spine and neck craned backwards into the corner of the wooden box in an obvious but vain attempt to escape whatever horror had ruffled his cravat, skewed his spectacles and left him in a state of catatonic… um, ok that didn't look like terror. Ummmm, more like his mind was lost somewhere between limbo, euphoria and the sacred realm.

There was also a red smear on his cheek that wasn't a blush… and another on his lips. It couldn't have been lipstick though as if the three T's kissed anyone, they made sure the mark was obvious and they never, ever, ever kissed anyone on the lips. For all their teasing, they did grant that one small mercy. Just what had happened? If it wasn't a kiss mark than… wait, was it a slap mark?! It would explain the skewed spectacles and the daze… except then why would he look happy?

He needed to revive his friend and get to the bottom of this, preferrable without destroying too much of the Scholar-turned-Lord's self-respect. That certainly couldn't be done with the servant watching, so… "Alright, I'll take it from here."

"But Sir?!"

"Trust me. He's a friend of mine and I know how to handle this."

The servant was clearly sceptical but nevertheless did as instructed and shuffled off, while Link climbed up into the carriage interior, which grew darker by the second as the sun descended completely behind the far-off peak. He'd have to be quick. The coach and stable hands will no doubt be getting impatient to finish their duties for the day. He'd told the servant he knew how to handle this. Well, he had some experience with traumatised soldiers but he couldn't guarantee the same methods applied to… whatever "trauma" Shad had suffered.

"Shad, hey Shad!" Simple name calling didn't work, not that he'd expected it to after the servant's attempts. He then tried gently shaking him. This got a response of vaguely batting his hands away but as soon as he stopped the scholar instantly reverted back to his comatose state. This was serious. If Shad didn't snap out of it soon, he'd be forced to take drastic measures.

Hmm, Zorran had certain words, certain "triggers" which could sometimes break him from his dazes. Perhaps the same was true of Shad? They were probably super complicated words, subjects he was passionate about. Now, he wished he'd paid more attention to his scholarly ramblings. Wait a minute, he didn't something he was passionate about but he did know someone! This could either break whatever spell he was under or break his mind completely. Was he sure about this?... No… Was it worth a try? Possibly… The results could be… dramatic!

Here goes nothing "Tamara…"

It certainly didn't produce the explosive reaction he'd predicted. At first, he thought it hadn't worked at all. Then, slowly but surely, the stunned scholar stirred from his stupor, blinking and mumbling. His blurry eyes fell on Link. "Mmmm, ohh Link, hello… hello, to what… to what do I owe this pleasure? Where is… where is she?"

"She's not here. She must have been gone at least five minutes."

"Really?! No, no I could have sworn she was here just a moment ago…"

"Shad, you've been practically comatose for the last five minutes!"

"Surely not! I was just… I was just trying to recall a poem from… from… from that Bill Stirlance play."

"Dude, you were completely out of it. The servants have been trying to get you out of the carriage so they can retire for the night. You just sat there in shock and barely responded to anything. It was only me mentioning her name that woke you up."

His eyes briefly threatened to glaze over again at the thought of Her but the dopey smile was quickly replaced with chagrin. "I did?! I mean, I was?! Oh dear, I'm dreadfully sorry."

"Don't apologise. Let's just get out of here. Here, looks like you need a hand."

"Oh no. I've caused you quite enough trouble for you already Link. Besides I can assure you I'm abso… absolu… absolutely fine." Shad waved away his concerns, as he staggered to his feet, his spectacles still skewed and his frame swaying an unbalanced pendulum. To restore equilibrium, he casually leant against the nearest surface, which happened to be the door. In the face of the sudden pressure, the door promptly obliged its duty and swung open, permitting the scholar the quick exit he clearly desired. It was only Link's quick reactions, grabbing his collar, that saved his face from an imminent date with the gravel outside. "Oh, I'm sooo sorry…" He moaned in embarrassment as he was pulled back into the carriage. "I just… just don't want to be any more of a burden."

"Ah, knock it off…" Link brushed it off as he helped his friend down from the carriage the correct way: feet first as opposed to on his head. "Besides…" he diverted as he slung one arm over his shoulder to steady the poor guy's wobbly walk "… what I want to know is how you got in that state. What did they do to you? What Happened?"

"Well, um, I would say but, er… there appears to be something wrong with my vision. It's rather distracting, not to mention more than a little disconcerting."

"Shad… your glasses aren't straight."

"Oh, ahem, ahaha, yes, would you look at that. Now, where were we?"

Seriously? Just how delirious was he? It had been less than a minute and he's already lost the plot. "Errrr, you were about to tell me just how you ended up comatose."

"Oh, yes, of course. Well, you see, that could prove a little hard to explain, as it's rather a long story and I'm not really sure how…"

Shad was suddenly cut off by the crowing of a certain triumphant swordmaiden. "Wohoho, Lord Shad, I never expected you to be one for downing the bottle. Things must have really changed after our reunion at Telma's."

"Oh, um, hi Ashei…"

"Ashei, any chance you could set aside your amusement for a moment and lend a hand?"

"Sure…" She took the scholar's other arm and together they began to aid him towards the entrance hall. "Soooooo, what was it? A secret bottle o' whiskey? Brandy in a hip flask? Welcome to the daring drinker's club, ya old Pecksniffian, I'm so proud!"

"Ashei, he's not drunk!" Well, he may have been drunk on something but it wasn't alcohol.

"Huh? Sure looks that way to me."

"Link is quite right. I am not drunk and, um, by the way, I don't think Pecksniffian means what you think it means." Even when delirious the man still found the brainpower to be pedantic! Though to be fair his delirium did appear to be lifting.

"But then why…" The swordmaiden began but was interrupted by a snap from the hero. "That's what I'd just asked when you arrived."

"And I was just explaining that it's rather a long story and difficult to explain fully because, um, well… I'm not entirely clear on all the details myself."

"Are you sure you're not drunk?" Ashei quizzed debiously.

"Honest! I didn't touch a drop."

"Ok, Shad just… start at the beginning."

"The start? Ok, well, um, I was… I was rather nervous, well very nervous actually, meeting Tamara…" at the mere mention of her name, his voice turned wistful and his gaze dreamy. Fortunately, it didn't prompt a recession as after a brief freeze he hastily continued. "… oh and her sisters, of course. I'm not particularly good at first impressions, especially with beautiful ladies and they, equally, aren't usually impressed by the shy scholarly type like me and rarely make any show of hiding that fact. Tamara and her sisters, however were very um, very um… very friendly… and charming… and beautiful… not to mention clearly highly intellectually minded. I can't rightly say whether that made things harder or easier but after the introductions we got to talking and… it was amazing…" He was going all wistful and gooey eyed again which, for his swordmaiden friend, looked to be inflicting almost physical discomfort. "Never before have I met three ladies so erudite or so passionate about the pursuit of knowledge, oh apart from her highness of course, haha. It's easy to see why she chose them as her Ladies-in-waiting…"

"Aren't we getting a little distracted?" Ashei grumbled.

"Oh yes, sorry. Well, we talked about so many things; my discoveries and inventions, the history of Hyrule in the third and fourth era, Science… Tasmin shared a fascinating theory on a way to conduct lightning energy and Tamara… Tamara is the only other person I've ever met who knows the etymology behind so many of our most famous mythical creatures, for example, did you know that…"

"Shaaaddd" Link warned, trying to maintain patience in the face of growing frustration.

"Ahem, sorry. Where were we?"

"You'd just been talking with the three most amaaazing girls for what seemed like a million years." Ashei drawled irritably.

"I wouldn't put it quite like that."

"Shad!" Link barked.

It was lucky the nobles were all inside because Shad's condition would have definitely attracted attention and their conversation would have set a flock of eyebrows flying. As it was, a couple of the coach and stable hands glanced their way in bemusement. Realising the potential danger to Shad's reputation of entering in such a state or being overheard, he pulled the trio away from the entrance to hide behind the immense pillars which supported the grand arch in front of the grand doorway.

The scholar however was oblivious to such details. "Oh, of course. Ahem, well, the thing was… you see, the thing was… throughout our conversations I began to get this feeling… that she was… that she was flirting with me."

Hold up?! that didn't sound right. "Don't you mean they?"

"Oh no, only Tamara. Tasmin and Terra were friendly and flattering but no, Tamara was the only one…" That was odd! The Three T's usually hunted as a pack. "It's ridiculous I know. I told myself it was just my heart playing tricks on me. I tried to keep it in but she was being so sweet and charming and I'm frankly not used to being complimented by a lady and…" He gulped. "Well, I accidently let slip that I thought she was beautiful and then I tried to hide it by saying she had a beautiful mind and then I got in a right mess, until I finally decided to be honest and I told her how amazing her knowledge and passion for learning was and telling her to never give it up and then, and then, and then… Then her reaction… I thought perhaps she felt insulted, patronised and I was about to apologise when… when…" Another wave of dreamy wistfulness, the strongest yet crept up his features, and Link suddenly found himself almost being strangled as Shad absent-mindedly attempted to stroke a red smeared cheek, oblivious to his arm being hooked round the hero's neck. "She kissed me… on the…"

"Arggghhhh" Link wheezed like old broken bellows and Shad instantly stopped.

"Oh sorry, sorry… um, she kissed me on the cheek…" Ok, that went some way to explaining things but when one of the Three T's kissed anyone, they made sure the mark was crystal clear and that still didn't explain the red on his mouth. "It was all so sudden; so stunning, so incredible and then I gazed at her and she gazed at me. She was so close and, I don't know, there was just something in the way she was looking at me…" Shad's speech was rapidly accelerating. "It produced some sort of irresistible madness and couldn't stop myself and I.I.I kissed her on the lips…" What?! He'd kissed Her!?

Clearly Shad had noticed his incredulous gawping face as he hastily clarified. "Oh, don't get me wrong. it was just peck… Oh, but it was absolutely exhilarating… But then the madness lifted and I realised what I'd done. I was raised to be a gentleman, to be polite, courteous and considerate of others and yet I'd tainted the purity of her lips. I had to apologise. I tried desperately but before I could she… she, um… she, um… she, um… she, um…" As quickly as the flood of babbling had set in, it evaporated, seemingly taking much of the scholar's vocabulary with it. His eyes were glazing over again.

"She what?!" Link snapped, shaking the man, both to cajole an answer but more importantly to save his friend from slipping back into delirium.

"She, um… well, I'm not really sure how to categorise it."

"Categorise?! Shad, this ain't no bloody botany lecture. Just spit it out." The swordmaiden barked impatiently.

"Well, er ahem…" Of all the emotions witnessed flashing across Shad's visage during this ordeal, the one Link had expected most, namely burning embarrassment, had been conspicuously rare… until now. This gave him pause.

"On second thought, this is private. We've already pried too much. If you don't want to answer…"

"Speak for yourself. I wanna hear it!" Ashei barged into his own attempted apology like a blunt axe.

"But…"

Shockingly, Shad sided with the swordmaiden. "Oh no! no! It's fine! In fact, it's almost exciting to tell you. My hesitance is just because…" he lowered his already quiet voice to a urgent whisper, as though he was about to divulge a dangerous secret that could destroy the entire kingdom if uttered. He even pulled them both in closer to complete the effect. "I have a question… it's a… well, you know… one of those sorts of questions, if you'll pardon my Goronese. You see… the thing is… well, she…"

Alright then, If you're really going to spit it out… just SPIT! IT! OUT!

"… is it still classified as a kiss if she sticks her tongue in your mouth?"

Link's jaw promptly crashed to the floor. Well, that certain wasn't something he ever expected to hear from Shad!

Ashei, meanwhile, proceeded to swallow her own tongue. Coughing and hacking, she cast off Shad's arm and stalked off. "That's it! Too much. I need a stiff drink. See you clowns around." Hold up! Was she… angry? She'd been the one determined to hear the answer and it wasn't like such a question was even close to the crudest thing she'd heard or even said herself.

She stormed through the door and the only sounds that remained were the rustling leaves and babbling river, the coaches, stable hands and horses all having already retired for the evening.

…

"Um, did I say something wrong? What was that?" Shad asked in befuddlement.

"Hey, don't ask me? I don't think even she knows what's going through that head of hers half the time."

Shad, finally confident in his own legs, extricated his arm from Link's shoulder and began to pace nervously. "So, to my question… um…"

Link shuffled awkwardly. He wished Ashei had stuck around to explain. "Oh, er yes… it is a kiss. It's called a Gerudo kiss."

"So, um, does that mean she likes me?"

Seriously, a lady flirts with him, probably incessantly, kisses him on the cheek and then to cap it all off, sticks her tongue in his mouth and he's still not sure? Shad may be a fountain of intellectual understanding but in terms of basic knowledge of life and love, he was greener than the hero's tunic! Most man would dream of having such blatant signals from the "fairer" sex "Do you really have to ask?!"

"Well, I've heard sometimes ladies say one thing and mean another. I just don't want to get my hopes up."

"They may say one thing and mean another but that doesn't include sticking their tongue down the throat of someone they don't like."

"So, she likes me?"

"I think so."

"Really?"

"Look, I can't absolutely guarantee it but I would say it certainly looks like it."

Shad stopped pacing. "She likes me…" he whispered incredulously. "She likes me…" he said uncertainly.

…

Then finally, in the fading glow of twilight, realisation dawned… "Holy mother of Hylia… SHE LIKES ME!" he shrieked. Without another intelligible word, the quiet retiring scholar suddenly dashed into the mansion emitting an ear-piercing cross between a whoop of excitement and a scream of sheer terror.

Oh no! What had he just unleashed?