Aaand we're back! Lots of exciting life updates got in the way of this installment, but I'm excited to say I'm here and ready to parrtaay! The "June" installment of this story is going to have multiple parts (don't ask me how many because I still can't decide) and I'm here for it! Emotionally, I knew Blaire's journey was going to be taxing, but I didn't realize just how much until writing this chapter. She's definitely lightening up and, if I'm being honest, I'm finding her story is more of a joy to work on again.

Speaking of joys to work on, I've also started drafting an original work I'll be publishing on Wattpad later this year with the help of a co-writer and one of my best friends. The story is called THE MIDNIGHT CHAPTER, and our handle is CressandLeigh. As of right now, the story is up with an introduction and a couple of character posters. Since I'm collaborating on this with someone else, I challenge you to figure out who I am: Cress, or Leigh? I'll tell you as soon as someone guesses right! (hint: it'll probably be an easy guess for you guys) I'll keep you guys updated as we add more to the story, including aesthetic boards and some fun ways to get y'all involved in the writing process!

I think this will be a cool way to start introducing you guys to my original work, dip back into Wattpad, and also make a serious move toward self-publishing. I've been doing a lot of soul-searching and I think it's the best avenue for me and my goals, but I'm nervous.

Like, crazy nervous.

Anyway, enjoy the chapter!

JUNE

Part I

THE AIR TURNED WARM AND heady under muggy ocean clouds and the summer sun. The near-constant brightness created more of a challenge to hunt during the day, but… I liked it. I enjoyed trying to overcome the obstacle of hiding, of getting to know the kind of stealth my body and mind were capable of. I found comfort in the practice and the training.

Something had changed since the night of that storm, as if I'd gone through yet another rite of passage. The rain, thunder, and blood had awakened something in me. Something that was familiar, yet foreign, like a human memory I hadn't accessed since becoming a vampire. I was afraid of it, but not too afraid to hide from it. Much like hunting during a sunny day, I learned how to navigate it.

There had also been another shift in the relationship between Jasper and I. Things didn't feel as tight between us, like we weren't constantly pulling at opposite ends of a rope. Instead, it was more relaxed. We spent more time apart.

Our days began where I slipped out of the cabin at daybreak, leaving him to one of the many books he'd brought back on his last supply run, or texting, or doing something on a computer that also came with the human things he'd deemed "necessary." I would come back when dusk overtook the ocean, like the tide as it always drew in when it rose, and Jasper would meet me, as steadfast as the cliffs around us.

We would walk along the beach, and he would talk. Mostly it was about the books he read, or stories about his time with the Cullen family – the vampiric moments, specifically, because he knew bringing up human things still rattled an ache deep inside me – or he'd teach me more about being a vampire. I didn't remember him being so talkative when I was human. It was another change that wasn't horrible at all.

"It's mostly Alice working," he said as the water washed over our bare feet, explaining the work he always did on his computer. "She tells me what stocks to buy and sell, and when. I just follow her instructions. One thing the Cullens taught me was that it doesn't hurt to have money."

"What do you do with it?" I asked. I brushed my fingers along his while we walked, as was also part of our daily routine. At some point in the day, one of us would reach out, seeking connection.

A slight touch was all we ever needed. Jasper answered quickly, entangling his fingers with mine. "Save it," he answered. "I wanted to set up for…"

He would never lie to me, but he still paused, held himself from saying something that would weigh down the lightness we'd found in each other. Normally we'd skate around the topics, but this newer version of myself was bolder. I didn't hide so much anymore. "Us," I finished. "You've been setting up something for us."

His shoulders drooped. The relief brushed across me like a breeze. "Or for you. You deserve to be taken care of. I'll always want to do that for you."

"I know." Or at least, I was starting to because Jasper gave me the space to be alone and develop my own thoughts. He was there to answer questions, and while he made no secret of his feelings, he always had a way of staying impartial.

He let me breathe. Let me think. Both things should've been so obvious – expected from whatever relationship we were supposed to have – but after James… I didn't think I was ever going to find myself again, much less have the chance.

Darkness would stretch across the ocean to meet us, and Jasper would nudge me. He would let go of my hand with a knowing sort of smile that stirred excitement within me. Then he started running, leaving behind a rush of air and the whisper, "You're it."

The game would last for hours. I knew it was a guise for training from Jasper. He would test the speed, stealth, and strategy I taught myself while hunting during the day. I used what I learned from Victoria, but made the movements entirely my own, honed by evading Jasper whenever I managed to tag him. My victories never lasted long.

The more we played, the more I questioned if his ability to read my tactics was something other than his gift or the intelligence I knew all vampires developed from the change. He was too… practiced.

One night, when Jasper won our game only seconds after I got him – by somehow encouraging the game near the cliffs where I couldn't escape him even if I wanted to – I knew this strategy was something he'd learned.

I could see it in the victory glittering in his eyes and his smug smirk as the same emotion slid over my skin. I liked it too, too much. It made my head fuzzy and sent something bouncing around my insides. I didn't know if I wanted to kiss him to wipe that grin off his face, or consume that cocky smile for myself. I wanted to claim it. Claim him.

"Where did you learn this?" I asked instead, breathless from the sudden intensity of my thoughts. I hoped he thought it was from the running.

His next smile was slight. The playful victory was gone, and nervousness prickled at the base of my neck. I asked something too heavy – something that threatened the lightness he found with me. I took a small step back, as if that could physically remove the weight that dropped between us. But it couldn't, just like it couldn't erase his scars and all the darkness he'd known before the Cullens or me. "I'm sorry –"

"There's nothing to be sorry about." He was trying to keep his voice gentle, but it grated with his stress. The emotion rubbed against my spine like sandpaper.

I brushed my fingertips against his hand. He responded fast, ensnaring my fingers the same way the hollowness in his eyes had a hold on something deep in my chest. I took a step toward the cabin. Pulled him with me. "Let's go home," I said.

It was the first time I'd called it that.

#

ANOTHER VAMPIRE WAS here.

I smelled it on the wind, but I couldn't see it. I was miles away from the cabin, the furthest I'd ever been. Clearly, venturing so far out was the worst decision I'd made in a while.

The scent was soft and sweet – like most vampires smelled – with an undercurrent of something else. Jasper had explained once vampires could have layered scents (which was why up close I could smell malt sugar and warmth from him, he'd explained) that could be tracked if a vampire practiced enough. James had practiced so well that he'd always been able to find me. That he always would've been able to. I didn't know a lot about it, how to pick apart scents like that, but I knew the smell I caught on the wind wasn't Jasper. That was enough to put me on edge, to stop running and stand still and wait.

Jasper also told me my newborn phase – while my thirstiest – was also my strongest. I would never be as physically capable as I was now. If that was the case, and this other vampire was a threat, I would handle it. I'd been able to unleash my most demonic form to kill James, and I would do it again to protect Jasper and the little home we'd created on the edge of a cliff.

I wasn't scared.

I wasn't.

Another breeze brought the scent with it, and it was stronger. But I couldn't see anything through the trees.

I shot up the closest tree to me, winding myself through the boughs, letting the pine and sap wash over me and my own scent. Surprise was on my side. The vampire was upwind. I'd take advantage of it any way I could. The branches scratched me, barely a tickle compared to what would've cut through my human skin. Once I was settled up high, I waited.

I didn't have to wait long. The scent was stronger, and it came with the faintest rustling. I tensed, curled my body forward, ready to pounce –

"Wait!"

I frowned.

The vampire finally broke out into my patch of the forest. She whirled around, practically moving in a pirouette, her short hair fluttering with her speed. Muted gold eyes were directed upward, scanning the trees. Where I was hiding. My eyes widened, I nearly slipped out of my place, as soon as I was able to take in all her delicate features. The memories hit just as fast. They consisted of knowing impish smirks, slips of fabric sailing through the air, overwhelming sympathy, words unsaid, laughing in too-tall heels, a lifesaver when I was drowning.

"Alice," I said. It sounded more like the answer to a question rather than a greeting.

She turned back around as I slipped out of the tree, landing neatly on the ground. I barely made a sound. When I straightened up, Alice's shoulders dropped. Relaxed. "I'm glad you heard me."

"What are you doing here?" At least that sounded like a question. A little abrupt, maybe rude, but… I never thought someone would make their way out to this isolated corner of the world, much less anyone from my past.

Much less anyone from Jasper's past.

She smiled, then adjusted a huge backpack on her shoulders. "To see you, of course. I come bearing gifts."

Gifts? I… didn't know what to say. "Do… I mean – we can go to the house."

If I sounded strange, she didn't comment on it. Her smile was still in place. "Okay."

But we didn't move. I frowned –

"I don't know where this place is, exactly," Alice clarified before I even had to ask. "I've never been here."

A small part of me was glad. I remembered being worried about Alice and her past with Jasper, but it didn't litter every memory I had with her. She'd never been like Tanya. Alice had been a friend, or at least she tried to be when I would let her. While I understood the relationship she and Jasper had, and that it ended long before he and I ever met, it still left me uneasy. Maybe insecure. I could admit that to myself. Call it possessive, but I wanted to have parts of Jasper for myself, parts that Alice or anyone else he'd been with before me, would never get.

Because of that possessiveness, it was hard to wrench myself around and lead her to the cabin. I wanted to keep that part of him – of us – to myself.

Alice kept pace with me, but I was also holding back from running as fast as I knew I could. I glanced at the heavy backpack bouncing against her as she ran. Maybe I should've asked for it –

"So how are you?" she asked me over the wind rushing between us.

It was a simple question that led to a complicated answer. Some days were good, filled with light and Jasper's smile. Other days I still struggled, hiding out in the woods so I could untangle my emotions alone when they became too turbulent. "I'm fine," I replied.

"Fine is good," Alice said. "Esme asked about you. She says hello."

Her chocolate chip cookies came to mind first. "I say hi back."

I didn't slow down until we broke out of the woods and onto the cliffs. Jasper was already outside the cabin, his hair ruffling in the breeze as he walked toward us. "I didn't know we'd see you out here so soon," he greeted Alice.

She slung her backpack off her shoulders and thrust it into him. "And the family thought we'd get a phone call from you both sooner. We know you may not come back to Forks any time soon, but we still care. Carlisle doesn't want to lose –"

"But he said he was done," the words flew out of me. Even though I saw Alice's frown, sluggish grainy memories took me back to the baseball field where I needed help and Carlisle only offered placation. "He said it didn't matter – nothing I'd been living through mattered."

Alice cringed. "I know. He knows. He was trying to avoid a fight."

"Well, he succeeded," I snapped.

"We would've fought, Blaire," Alice said. "We were going to – in that ballet studio – but then James had you –"

And then there had been fire.

Jasper's fear and anger roiled in my chest as he pulled me into his side. "So that's all this is?" he asked, voice neutral despite his emotions. "An emissary visit from the Cullens?"

Alice frowned. "You know it's not like that. I also wanted to see you both. Maybe for the last time in a while, because Forks is still kind of…"

"Kind of what?" I asked.

She sighed. "Maybe we should talk inside."

The occasional break in clouds made everyone's skin glimmer as we entered the cabin. The building only offered some cover; the massive windows couldn't keep the light out. The same could be said for the curiosity in Alice's eyes as she took a cursory glance over the house, its lack of furniture, and its massive bed in the middle of everything. She snorted. "This was definitely Rose and Em's place."

Jasper set Alice's bag on the giant island in the kitchen and unzipped it, pulling out its contents. "What's happening in Forks?" he asked.

"Nothing we can't handle," Alice replied. "But… it's tumultuous, as you know it can be. It will take a while to settle, but it'll calm down. I've seen that much."

The roar of the ocean had been dulled by shutting the cabin door, but panic still barreled through my head, blocking everything out except Alice's words. She frowned at me like she knew it too. "The high school is still reeling from Blaire and Bella, as is most of everyone. It's a big scandal for the little logging town."

"What are they saying?" I asked.

"What we expected," Alice said. "It's not charitable, but nothing damning. It hasn't affected Bella much. She told everyone she thought she could find you, but hadn't gotten anywhere close. Your father stayed in Forks until the end of May. He hasn't given up, but he hopes you'll find him when you're ready."

I thought of my dad a lot during my long hunts, hiding under the shade of trees between passing herds of deer and elk. He was yet another complication I struggled to untangle. The wound of his betrayal burned at so many of my final human memories of him. In the end, I hadn't forgiven him, but… I loved him. So I mourned him. And I empathized with him. We'd both lost so much in such a short amount of time. Including each other.

I could never seek him out again, which was both torture and relief. At least he would be safe forever.

"Good," was all I said.

"I brought a few more things," Alice said, moving on. "Jasper's list didn't seem to hold much of anything – a trait I've never been able to rid him of – so I brought you some basics."

"I got basics," Jasper said, confused.

"For males." Alice gave me a meaningful look before she rolled her eyes. I smiled. "I got more clothes, because obviously, better toiletries, and a radio. I figured brooding silence and these ocean waves can only give someone so much reprieve."

She pulled out the items in question as she spoke. I recognized leggings and sports bras – more clothes fitted truer to my size compared to the unisex T-shirts, hoodies, and basketball shorts Jasper brought home. Then there were the toiletries: luxury body washes, bath bombs, shampoo and conditioner –

"Facemasks?" I asked, picking up one of the pastel-colored pouches.

"Of course, we don't really need them," Alice said, "but they're still nice. We can have a spa day!"

Alice had been able to make things normal, or as normal as she'd been able to, when my human days were the darkest. As always, she was trying to be my friend. This time, I could let her. She smiled at me, wide and excited, because she already knew what I was going to say. "We should," I told her anyway, just to have the words be real and out in the open.

"Excellent!" she exclaimed. "Jazz, I got everything else delivered to town. Do you mind picking it up?"

"I'm on it," he replied, smiling my favorite small smile at me. "You ladies can have the whole house to yourselves. I'll be back late."

Without missing a beat, he closed the space between us, and wrapped his arm around me before kissing the top of my head. My stomach flipped at the sudden closeness, the way his soft breath fanned across my temple, his voice vibrating around me. "Alice has her phone if you need to call me."

"I'll be all right." I squeezed myself into him just before he could pull completely away.

"Try not to burn the place down," he called over his shoulder as he walked out the door. "I'm rather partial to it."

"Wouldn't dream of it!" Alice called before he tore off, nothing more than a rush of air against the windows and a few strands of flying grass.

Before I could stare in the space Jasper had taken up for too long, a pastel yellow bottle flew in front of me. I caught it and had to check my strength before nearly shattering it. It was… nail polish?

Static cut through the air next before Rhianna's voice blared throughout the tiny cabin from a Top 40 station. I turned toward Alice, who had already flitted back to the kitchen island to spread out even more of her spa-like things into neat, organized sections. She grinned at me. "Let's do this."

I could feel excitement, bright and unrestrained, manifest itself as an answering grin on my face.

V

When I tell y'all I've been pumped for Alice's return, I mean it. I've missed her so much!

As always, this update is also here as a check in. How are you? I'm so glad you're here!