Sorry for the long absense I only own the aliens.

Hobbes struggled as Gassendi, Palminetti, and Lock all carried him into a laboratory full of aliens in lab coats.

"Cool, a monkey with chicken pox!" One of them said.

Hobbes was just about to point out that he was a tiger when a different scientist interrupted. "Are you an idiot? That's not a monkey with chicken pox! It's a starfish with two heads."

"Not again." Gassendi groaned.

"It looks more like a dog eating a banana." Another scientist said.

"No, a dolphin with a diaper." Yet another scientist added.

"A dolphin with a diaper! Of course." The rest said.

Shocked, Hobbes turned to Lock. "These are your scientists?" He asked.

"Sadly yes." Lock replied.

"What's wrong with them?" Hobbes added.

"Nobody knows, and No one wants to know." Gassendi answered. "And everyone hopes that whatever it is isn't contagious."

"Actually, I believe the problem is just simply that the radiation of this planet's ozone layer apparently fried the brains of our minions, except for a select few. And if it were some kind of brain condition than chances are that, due to the evident stupidity of the entire crew, it is definitely contagious." Palminetti stated

"What does it take to make you shut up?" Lock asked as the three then took Hobbes to an operating table.

"Probably extreme and painful violence unsuitable for this movie." Palminetti answered as he strapped Hobbes to the operating table by the arms and legs.

"See ya later Gassendi!" Palminetti said as he exited the room and Lock crashed into the wall.

Gassendi walked to the corner of the room while a dazed Lock exited. "Charge up the Death Ray."

Hobbes suddenly screamed, "WHAT?"

"Got it!" One said as it turned on a gun like machine. "It'll be done in approximately three glotes."

"Say what?" Hobbes stated.

"Eight Earth Hours!" Gassendi told Hobbes.

"Are you gonna blast the Earth?" Hobbes asked.

"Nope. It isn't nearly powerful enough. We're blasting you." Gassendi stated.

Hobbes struggled to escape. He wasn't going out like this.

"You can't do this. THIS MOVIE IS RATED PG FOR CRY'N OUT LOUD!" Hobbes screamed.

"That is the only reason we're doing this. Dropping you off a building or shooting you in the head is too gruesome." Gassendi said. "This will leave no remnants." Gassendi turned to his scientists. "I'm going for coffee. Do not let him escape."

After Gassendi was gone, Hobbes turned to the nearest alien. "Do you have a guitar?"

"Is it the yellow thing that people eat that looks like a telephone?" The alien said.

"No! That's a banana! I mean the thing with strings that humans with drawings on their bodies use to make music." Hobbes said.

"Oh! Here!" One said as it undid the arm holds and magically pulled out an electric guitar from under Hobbes examination table.

Hobbes shook his head. How did they do that? He grabbed the guitar and began strumming the notes to a song he recognized.

"I like big tigers and I cannot lie.

You other brothers can't deny.

When a tiger walks in, big furry waste.

Orange and Black stripes in your face, you get…

Freaked-out-and-you-start-running-for-your-life!"

(Song My Town by the Cartoon Boyfriend starts)

Calvin started kicking through rubble. There had to be something useful.

This is my town

He kicked and he kicked until stumbling into something. "Pay dirt!"

Watch your step if you come around

Calvin took off the rubble to find a duffle bag filled with his stink bombs.

I don't think I know you

"Alright!" Calvin smiled as he slung the bag over his shoulder.

Well maybe its time to show you

Smiling, Calvin continued his search.

This is my home I will be standing here alone.

Soon he reached his trashed room, where he found a familiar water pistol on top of the wreckage. It was the transmogrifyer gun.

If you think your ready well come on in and ring the bell.

"Now that's what I need." Calvin said as he aimed at a random piece of rubble.

Hello Mr. Hill finally you got your hit

He watched satisfied as it changed into the familiar shape of Spaceman Spiff.

Coming from the nowheres lying across the clovers

"Hello Calvin." Spiff asked.

Hello Lady slick did you pull another trick

"Welcome to the real world." Calvin said as he shot two other pieces of rubble.

Beautiful makeover make the perfect couple.

"I'm here!" Stupendous man said as he and Tracer Bullet appeared.

Did you know things look amazing

"What happened? Who are you? Why am I asking so many questions? Is Elvis really dead?" Tracer Bullet asked. "Answer me!"

So this is my town

Calvin smiled at the sight of his three alter egos and put the transmogrifyer gun in the duffle bag. "Welcome. I've got something for you three to deal with."

Watch your step if you come around

Just name it!" Spiff replied.

I don't think I know you

Calvin searched through the garage ruins. He found a baseball bat safely in a corner.

Well maybe it is time to show you.

"Weaponry!" Calvin smiled.

This is my home

Calvin put the bat in his duffle bag and began searching through a toolbox. He put in a hammer, a screwdriver, and a monkey wrench.

I will be standing here alone

"I'm coming Hobbes!" Calvin said to himself before he found a chainsaw in a corner.

And if you think you are ready

Smirking, Calvin looked in all directions before putting the power tool in his duffle bag. As he looked up from putting away the chainsaw, he saw the face of Stupendous Man staring down at him.

Well come on in and ring the bell.

Stupendous man reached into the bag and took back the chainsaw. "Does this look like it's PG appropriate?"

Hello shiny suit

As he trashed the power tool, Calvin cried out to his alter ego. "Spoilsport!

Hanging out in the neighbourhood

Calvin was in the middle of using the hose to fill up a water balloon.

You think your such a pro

He looked over to Tracer who was running the hose.

You know you're just a blow.

Calvin gave Tracer the thumbs up.

Tracer turned off the hose and Calvin put the balloon into his overflowing duffel bag.

Hello charming ghost

"That's it." Calvin said as he ran over to help out Spiff with his building snowballs.

Have you made your final toast?

Tracer began dragging away the hose to put in another place. Calvin met with Spiff and bent down to start making snowballs.

Everything you say is just to see what you can give

Calvin and Spiff watched as Stupendous Man used his super speed to make a six-foot wall of snow. Stupendous Man waved and went to finish off the wall.

Did you know things look amazing?

Spiff, and Tracer stood up to wait for Stupendous Man to finish his wall. The aliens were in for a hell of a time.

So this is my town

Calvin carried his duffel bag to the tree house containing the G.R.O.S.S clubhouse.

Come on in and ring the bell.

He began climbing up ladder his dad had attach due to Calvin's complaints about Hobbes not letting him up into the treehouse

Watch your step if you come around

Calvin removed the stink bombs and water balloons from his duffel bag

I don't think I know you

"Not much longer now Hobbes!" Calvin said.

So maybe its time to show you

Palminetti was showing the aliens battle strategies for.

This is my home

And not one of them had any idea what was going on. They just sat still and nodded along.

I will be standing here alone

Lock walked into his room to find a bunch of aliens tearing through his room.

"What's going on?" Lock asked.

And if you think your ready

"We're looking for those darn Bunny Slippers." One answer

Well Ballistic stranger rearrange her

"GET OUT!"

I think we're in blow-up danger

Gassendi worked intently on an unidentifiable machine.

This is my town

It would've been easier if he had some kind of assistant helping him, but he could manage without .

Watch your step if you come around,

Scar looked outside a window from inside his ship.

I don't think I know you

Soon it would all be his.

Maybe its time to show you.

Hobbes played a random song to the scientist as they clapped along.

This is my home

Hopefully he'd be able to use their stupidity against them to escape.

I will be standing here alone

Calvin looked out into the distance to see that an alien ship was hovering over the city.

And if you think your ready

His best friend was in danger, and everyone he knew was missing.

Well come on in and ring the bell

He looked around Stupendous Man, Spiff, and Tracer were all making more snowballs.

Ring the bell, ring the bell, ring the bell, ring the bell, ring the bell.

"You're done for, Scar." Calvin muttered.

Come on in, Come on in, come on in, come on in, come on in, come on in, come on in, come on in, come on in, come on in.

A bunch of alien sat bored and cramped in the King's chamber. Lock, Palminetti, Gassendi and Scar stood at the front of the room.

"Can we just get this meeting over with?" Gassendi whispered. "I don't like the idea of leaving my scientists alone!"

"What's the worst that could happen?" Palminetti asked.

Gassendi shook his head. "Once I left them alone with a hostage Klorkin, when I came back, the Klorkin had lost nineteen fingers because of an unauthorised experiment that they'd held. …And Klorkins don't even have fingers."

"Technically, I asked what the worst thing that could happen was. I didn't ask what they had already done." Palminetti said.

"SHUT UP!" Lock and Scar screamed.

"Can we leave now?" One of the aliens asked.

Scar cleared his throat. "NO! Now we are on the verge of stopping the Earth Potent. We just need you all to come with Lock to retrieve the documents so we can be given this planet. There is a chance of resistance, meaning that you may have to fight off the Potent's minions. Are there any questions?"

Scar looked as a bunch of aliens raised their hands. "Excluding questions about Lock's bunny slippers." Almost all of them lowered their hands, making Lock scream in anger. Scar pointed to one at random.

"Does Commander Lock really wear bunny slippers?" It asked.

As Lock groaned in exasperation, Scar pointed to another alien.

"Where is the punch and pie?" The alien asked.

"There isn't any!" Scar replied as he pointed to another one.

"Why are Palminetti and Gassendi here?" The alien asked.

"Because…" Scar said, as he looked thoughtful. "I have no idea!"

"Mind if I answer that question?" Palminetti asked.

Lock was first to answer, "Yep!"
"I am in this scene for entertainment reasons." Palminetti explained. "The writer is attempting to get in a moment where I'm struck by lightning. But that isn't going to happen. Because I'm far smarter then him…"

As Palminetti was sent flying into the crowd by a bolt of lightning, Scar pointed to another alien.

"Can I have a puppy?" It asked.

Scar glared at the alien. "This meeting is over! Get ready for a battle."

"Against who?" One of the aliens asked.

Scar screamed in anger and reached one of his tentacles to slap the offending alien in the head. "Palminetti just spent half-a-Quarit teaching you goons battle strategies. Weren't you listening?"

"Oh that was what he was doing. I thought that he was just teaching us how to play a game."

"What is wrong with this crew?" Scar yelled out

"I think I know the answer sir…" Palminetti stated as he raised his hand, despite being char-boiled.

Lock was first to react. He reached and grabbed a piece of rubble from the strike of lightning, and threw it at a charred Palminetti's head, knocking the alien unconscious.

"Good throw!" Scar said approvingly. "Meeting adjourned. Get ready for battle."

"But the most wonderful thing about tigers, there's much, much more than one!" Hobbes sang.

The scientists began applauding Hobbes as Gassendi entered.

"That does it. The first thing I do when this is done is hiring a new crew. Or at least join a new one." He moaned. "What are you idiots doing?"

"We're learning through song." One replied readily.

"Learning what?" Gassendi questioned.

"How to learn through song!" The alien answered.

"Where did you get that thing?" Gassendi said as he pointed at Hobbes guitar.

"I don't know!" A scientist replied, causing Gassendi to groan in annoyance.

"How much longer until the death ray goes off?" Gassendi asked.

"Twenty-two Yars." One answered as he checked a timer on the death ray.

"In about fifteen minutes, you will be reduced to nothingness." Gassendi told Hobbes. "And your planet will belong to us."

"Did it ever occur to you things that Calvin IS NOT the Earth Potent?" Hobbes asked.

"Sure. But why take chances and back out." Gassendi said.

"But he isn't." Hobbes replied. "So just back out before you humiliate yourself any further."

Gassendi rolled his eyes in disbelief. "Okay so if this Calvin doesn't rule the world, then who does?" He asked sarcastically.

"Hollywood."

"They're here!" Spiff said as he jumped down from the GROSS tree house.

Calvin turned to see a hundred or so ships landing just outside of the wall of snow. "Wow! Get into battle positions."

Meanwhile Lock exited his ship to see the large wall of snow surrounding the house.

"Somebody knock down this wall!" Lock ordered.

"NOT IT!" A hundred or so incompetent aliens hollered.

"Lock's it!" One of the aliens said.

Lock groaned in anger. Did he have to do everything alone?

Lock stepped backwards. He looked around and began running (don't ask me how since he has tentacles instead of legs.) at the wall. As he got near-by, he jumped in the air and slammed headfirst into the wall of snow. On impact, Lock screamed and fell onto the ground. Unfortunately, the collision that made Lock scream in pain created only a minor dent in the wall.

"Uh… Lock… You do realize that there is an entrance not too far away from you." Calvin called out from behind the wall.

"Of course I hadn't." Lock screamed as he slowly stood up. "Everybody head for the entrance immediately."

"Why?" One asked

"Because he has candy." Lock lied.

Suddenly, a crazed look came upon the alien goons. They all called out "CANDY!" and raced after the wall.

Lock watched in amazement as the goons combined their strength and ploughed down the wall, coming face to face with Calvin and his water pistol.

"Wow…" muttered Calvin. "That worked well."

Lock stood down and walked in front of all the goons.

"Give us the Earth." Lock called out. "Or prepare to fight."

In response, Calvin sprayed the commander in the face with the water pistol. "I like that second option."

Lock yelped in discomfort as water splashed in his face. The other aliens shrugged and jumped after the six year old. But before they could grab Calvin, a large bang sounded off.

Everyone paused to look at Tracer Bullet, clutching a smoking revolver. "Mind if I join in?" Tracer smiled.

Almost immediately after Tracer's appearance, part of the wall of snow blew up. The aliens once again turned to see that Spaceman Spiff had hi-jacked one of their battleships.

"I wouldn't mind getting in on this battle." Spiff stated.

"Me too!" called out Stupendous Man as he descended on the group.

"You just made a fatal mistake." Lock said. "Minions, I want you to take care of those three wackos while I take care of the Earth Potent. ATTACK!"

The fight for the city had begun.