Second Chances

by Peetabreaddd

FULLY UPDATED! What happens when Katniss can't live without Peeta anymore after they won the war? Feeling lonely, Katniss does something tragic to make it all stop, but is given a second chance to make everything right. STORY HAS BEEN COMPLETELY REDONE

1. Chapter 1

Hey everyone. I've taken this story and I've edited the whole thing and added waaaaay more. I've combined chapters and just rewrote everything. I gave up right after I started writing this because of a lot of negative comments on it being a 'waste of a chapter' and how there were boring parts. And then of course there's the horrible…'they're' 'their' and 'there' issue. When I was younger, I was really bad about that. I'm sure it happens in different chapters, but I've fixed them. I'm realizing so much of this is from Peeta's point of view.

When I don't like a story, I'm never negative to the writer. I simply just stop reading. Please don't put negativity on here. This is therapeutic for me, to drown out the world and have fun, and I hope when you all read this, you feel the same way! Happy reading!

Katniss had been home in District 12 now for...actually, she didn't know how long she had been home. Each day since Haymitch brought her home, she had become more and more withdrawn. Greasy Sae would come to her house in the Victor's Village to take care of her. Cook her meals, clean her house, make sure she took a shower and changed her clothes. Haymitch even came over every day to check up on her. But the more time passed, the more withdrawn she became. Bit by bit, Katniss was losing herself. Losing any reason to go on living.

It started out as small things. Not taking a shower for a day or two. Or staying in bed till lunch time. Or even not talking when Sae came by and made her dinner. But as each day passed, it became worse. Katniss stopped speaking all together. She stopped eating. She stopped showering. She would stay in bed all day, and if she did decide to get up, she would sit in the rocking chair, staring at the wall. Sae couldn't get through to her, and as hard as he tried, Haymitch couldn't get through to her.

He wanted to call Dr. Aurelius, but he knew what would happen. They would take her away, put her in a hospital. Maybe in another district, or worse, take her back to the Capitol. He couldn't do that to her. Haymitch knew the only one who could ever get through to her, would be Peeta.

But he knew what was happening to Peeta. He wasn't getting much better himself. He wasn't the same. Snow had made sure of that. Haymitch tried talking to Katniss, telling her that he would be back. But Katniss was gone. She was lost somewhere inside her own mind, and she wasn't coming out.

Katniss had lost everything. Everyone that was dear to her. Not literally everyone, but all their deaths left a heavy weight on her chest. She mourned each loss greatly. And losing Peeta and Prim, that was just the straw the broke the camel's back.

Katniss wanted out. She wanted out of her life. Out of this world. She would stare out into her house all day, only to go to sleep to dream of fire, mutts, blood, and her family and friends screaming for her to help. She just wanted this to end. She missed Peeta. She couldn't ever let herself think about him because her heart would ache for him. Her boy with the bread. Her dandelion of hope. He was gone. He was never coming back.

She didn't mean to fall in love with him, but she did. She tried to remember that exact moment she fell in love. Ever since her father had died, and she swore to herself that she would never fall in love, get married and start a family. She had imbedded that so far into her brain, that she didn't know she was in love until it was too late, and Peeta was gone. Was it in the second arena, when she realized that she needed him? Or on the Victory tour, when the only peaceful night sleep she got, was when he would hold her in his arms? Or was it when she first kissed him in the caves? No. It was when he threw her the bread. But she was too young to notice.

Then, by the time the Hunger Games happened, she was so stubborn, she never saw it. Love. She loved him. And she ruined it. She pushed him away. She left him to get captured, and tortured, and in the end, she lost him. She didn't deserve to live. She deserved to die.

"It's good to see you boy," Haymitch said, as Peeta got off the train, and hugged him. He loved Peeta. Like a son. And a best friend. He couldn't be happier to have him home. "Welcome home," he said. Peeta pulled back and looked at him.

"It's good to be back Haymitch," Peeta said. He looked around a little, as Haymitch started walking with him. Patting him on the back. He knew what Peeta was looking for. Or who he was looking for.

"She didn't come," Peeta said.

"I'm afraid not. But don't take it personal. She's not doing too well. She's been on her own for five months now. You know she doesn't know how to take care of herself," Haymitch said. Peeta looked at him, like he was trying to figure out exactly what he has just said.

"But she knows how to hunt. She can feed herself. She was taking care of her sister and mom after her dad died. Right?" Peeta asked. Haymitch didn't know how to answer that. Peeta had his memories so warped, that he questioned everything.

"She did. But Katniss isn't the same since she came back. I want you to be prepared. She hasn't talked in almost three months, she stopped eating a month ago. I've gotten her to drink, but that's not easy anymore. She lays in bed all day," Haymitch said.

He didn't want to sugar coat anything or hide anything from him. He deserved better. He deserved to always be told the truth. He deserved to be treated like a man. He didn't deserve what he got. His whole identity, stolen from him.

"Well, I can help. We can do this," Peeta said. Haymitch nodded, and they started walking towards the Victor's Village. Haymitch purposely took the longer way, not wanting Peeta to see where his families Bakery used to be. He knew he wasn't ready for that. They got to Katniss' house, and Haymitch stopped on the steps.

"You go on in there. Let her see you. I hope you can help her. I can't keep talking to Aurelius for her. He wants to talk to her, and if she doesn't answer, he's gonna come and see her. He'll take her away if she doesn't snap out of this. If he takes her..." Haymitch trailed off.

"If he takes her, she'll never get better," Peeta said. Haymitch nodded. Peeta turned on his feet and opened the door. He could see Katniss sitting in the rocking chair. He had waited five months to see her again. He knew he loved her. He thought about nothing but her the whole time he was in the Capitol, being pumped full of every drug known to man, trying to heal his mind. He knew somewhere in his mind that he loved her. And he was fighting trying to always hold onto that feeling, and actually feel love.

"I'm so sorry Peeta," Katniss cried. Peeta was startled from hearing her voice. She couldn't have known he was here. "Please forgive me," she cried and slumped a little. He heard her drop something. He walked carefully into the room, and what he saw, would haunt him forever. He closed his eyes. Not another flashback.

"HAYMITCH!" Peeta screamed. What he saw couldn't be real. Haymitch burst in, and Peeta looked at him. Focus on Katniss. He looked back over, and ran over to her, just in time to catch her as she fell out of the chair. "NOOOO!" Peeta screamed.

Katniss had slit her wrists with a pair of scissors that he vaguely remembered her mother keeping in a drawer.

"No Katniss please look at me," Peeta cried, slapping her face. He was already covered in her blood. He closed his eyes, trying to shake any shiny thoughts away from him. Katniss needed him. She wasn't a mutt. She was just Katniss. Haymitch ran for towels to put them over her wrists to try and stop the bleeding. But they were soon soaked with blood. He knew this wasn't going to help.

"Please Katniss wake up. Keep your eyes open," Peeta cried. Katniss was thin, and pale in his arms. She opened her eyes and looked right up at him. "Why did you do this?" Peeta cried.

"Because I can't...live without you," she whispered. She couldn't live without him? Him? But she didn't love him like that. She was in love with Gale.

"But I'm right here," Peeta cried.

"Don't you dare die on me Katniss. I have fought too hard to keep you alive damn it!" Haymitch yelled, squeezing her wrists tighter.

"I need Prim," Katniss whispered. Peeta cried harder. "She was on fire...she needs me...I need to save her," Katniss whispered.

"No Katniss please. She's gone Katniss. She's not in pain anymore. But I'm here. And I need you. I can't live without you," Peeta said. After all they went through. Shiny memories or not, he knew he loved her, even if he couldn't feel it. But he was crying now, wasn't he? He must feel something. Katniss stared at him, like she just now realized he was there.

"Peeta?" she asked. Peeta sobbed louder.

"I'm right here Katniss. Just hold on please. Don't let go," Peeta said. He felt Katniss starting to shake, and her eyes were closing, and then...there was nothing. "Katniss!" Peeta yelled and shook her. But he knew. He just knew. She was dead.

Katniss Everdeen was a survivor. She had survived starvation, two Hunger Games, and a war. But now she was dead, in his arms.

Katniss gasped for air. Where was she? She looked all around. How the hell did she get into the woods?

"Hello Katniss," someone said. Katniss stopped in her tracks. She knew that voice. She turned around and saw her father. More handsome than ever, in his hunting clothes.

She had really done it. She really did end her life. And now she was reunited with her father. Katniss ran to him and threw her arms around his neck and sobbed. Boy did she sob. She let go every tear she never shed for her father dying.

For everything she could imagine. Every single moment of pain since her father died. For every single time she was starving. For every single person that got hurt. For all of her friends and family that she lost. For the Hunger Games, the war. Every moment of her life that she truly didn't shed tears for, she cried them all out now. She wouldn't have to feel that pain anymore. She didn't have to be sad. She was gone. And she'd be ok now. No more pain. No more sadness. No more sorrow.

"It's alright now Katniss," her father soothed. She hadn't felt his arms around her since she was a young girl. A time when she could depend on someone. That she could lean on. A place where she felt safe.

"I'm not the only man in your life who's held you like this, and you've felt safe," her father said. She hadn't voiced that out loud. "I know what you're thinking. And you felt like this with Peeta. But you got so used to building that wall up around you, that you never let yourself feel safe. Feel loved," he said. Katniss pulled back and looked at him.

"Am I really seeing you? Are you really here?" Katniss asked. Her father smiled.

"Yes, you're really seeing me. And yes, I'm really here," he said, smiling at her, holding her cheek. Katniss looked around.

"Where's Prim? I have to see her. And Finnick and Cinna. Rue. Oh God, Boggs and Mags. Where are they?" Katniss asked. He placed his hands on her shoulders.

"They're not here anymore Katniss. But you'll see them again. I promise. You're going to be with them again, I just had to see you one last time, in person," her father said.

"Why aren't they here? I did this so I could see them again. To say how sorry I am," Katniss cried.

"Katniss calm down. You will see them again. I promise. Now just come sit down and talk to me. We don't have much time," he said and led her to a log to sit on. They were sitting in front of the lake. She instantly wished she could bring Peeta here.

"You'll get that chance Katniss, I promise," he told her. He smiled at her and touched her cheek again. "You are one of the three most beautiful girls in the entire world," he told her. Katniss knew she was one of three. Her mother and Prim.

"I am so sorry that I left you. But I am so proud of the woman you became," he said. Katniss let out a strangled cry.

"Proud? How can you be proud of me? I got Prim killed. I couldn't take care of our family. I lost Peeta. He lost his leg because of me. He doesn't even remember who he is. Cinna and Finnick died because of me. So many people died because I pulled those berries out and embarrassed that Capitol. Because I couldn't be in love with Peeta. So many people lost their lives," Katniss cried.

"Katniss, what happened to you, wasn't your fault. I died in an explosion. And your mother was depressed and couldn't care for you. None of that was your fault. You stepped up and took care of her and Prim the only way you knew how. The way I taught you. You kept them alive. That's not something I'm ashamed of. That's something I'm proud of. You brought your mother back from her depression. You kept her going, and you made Prim strong. You should be proud of that," her father told her. Katniss wouldn't believe that.

"I didn't do any of that on my own though. I almost died out in the rain," Katniss said. In the rain? What an odd thing say. It was the arena, and in the war that she almost died. Why would she mention the rain? Her father of course knew what she meant. The day she had given up hope.

"I remember that day well. I watched you. I cried for you. But I guided you to," Her father said. Katniss looked up at him. "I remember the way he would stare at you when you were kids. And I just knew one day you'd be staring back. I guided you to the bakery that day. I needed you to get some of that hope back. You had lost all your hope, but I needed you to keep going. I needed you to be strong. And you went to Peeta's house. And he threw you the bread, and the next day you saw that dandelion. He gave you hope for surviving. He gave you hope that you could keep going," her father said.

Katniss let tears fall down her face. He wiped them away. How could she leave Peeta? How could she never tell him that she loved him? How could she not have realized that day that he threw her the bread, that she was in love with him? Her father chuckled.

"You both were eleven. You didn't know what that kind of love was. Peeta only knew at the age of five, because he is a rare kind of human being that can fall in love at five years old," he joked. Katniss wiped her tears away.

"You were eleven. That's nothing to be ashamed about. You weren't ready then. You still needed to survive. Peeta gave you that hope to keep going, you just needed the skills, the knowledge of how to do it. You needed a friend in the woods again. And that's what led you to Gale. Your best friend," he said. Katniss put her head down.

"He was always just your friend Katniss. You know that now. The second you realized you loved Peeta was when all your feelings became clear," he said. There was still that fear in the back of her mind, and her father knew it.

"Even if Prim hadn't died that day. You would have gone back to the Capitol and shot the arrow at Coin. After you killed Snow. But it still would have been Peeta to save you, and you would still be right here with me. It would have taken a bit longer for it to have happened, because Prim and Gale would still be there to take care of you, but once Peeta came back, and you realized he wasn't the same, you would have still fallen into the same depression that your mother did," he told her.

Katniss hadn't realized that by her not living life, she had done the exact same thing her mother did. The guilt of how she treated her mom made her nauseous.

"Your mother was never mad at you. She was mad at herself. And she let you be angry with her because she felt it was her punishment for checking out on you. Sorta how you checked out because you felt it was your punishment," her dad said, shocking Katniss. "She didn't know how to handle it Katniss. Try and forgive her. For yourself. She loves you," he said. Katniss didn't know what to say. Her father went back to what he was originally talking about.

"You did need Gale though Katniss. He was going to help you survive. You wouldn't have been able to figure out how to do it by yourself. Little things you could, but Gale truly taught you how to survive. And he kept you from hardening your heart completely. He gave you something to smile about, to care about. You needed a friend. You needed a father, but the next best thing was a brother. Living in District 12, living in the Seam…it has a way of warping your thinking. You thought because you were friends, that you HAD to marry him. But he wasn't your soulmate. He was always going to be a big brother," Katniss covered her mouth.

"That's exactly what he's been. He was always like an older brother. It wasn't until the Games when they were forcing Peeta down my throat. They were taking away my choice. I thought maybe I was supposed to be with Gale, because they thought I needed to be with Peeta, that the Capitol couldn't be right about that. They were taking away my choice, " Katniss cried. She had never been so honest in her life. But this was her dad. She could tell him anything.

"Katniss, I know all that. It's ok. You were 16 years old. Your still only 17, almost 18. You may have grown up and had to become the adult when I died, but it still doesn't change the fact that you are a teenager. You're allowed to be confused and angry and allowed to make mistakes,"

"My mistakes cost people their lives. And my mistakes cost Peeta his sanity. It cost Peeta everything," Katniss cried. Her father took her into his arms again as she cried.

"And it still comes down to the fact that you were only a teenager, who was forced to grow up, forced to starve, forced to kill children, forced to lead a rebellion, and forced to love. Not even the most stable adult can do that and come out the other side smelling like a primrose. You were 16 years old Katniss Everdeen. You were forced. You did the best you could," he said into her ear.

"This is my punishment then. I shouldn't be able to live. I failed at everything I did," Katniss said. Her father pulled back to look at her.

"This isn't a punishment. And you will live. You get a second chance Katniss. A second chance to really change things," her father said. Katniss shook her head.

"No daddy I don't want another chance. Please just let me stay here with you and Prim. I'm so tired. I'm tired of fighting. I'm tired of feeling," Katniss cried, and tried to hug him, but her father pulled her away to look at him.

"You get another chance to fix some of these things. To make things better. You can't stay here with Prim because she's not here. I'm the only one who's staying. Prim, Finnick, Cinna...none of them are here anymore. They're waiting on you," he said.

"No, I'm not going. Daddy I died. I died in Peeta's arms. And Haymitch...I'm dead. You don't get a second chance after that," Katniss cried.

"Well, you do. So, you have to listen to me. Believe in Haymitch. Trust him. Listen to what he tells you to do, even when you don't understand it, or like it. And don't get angry when he doesn't tell you things. He knows what he's doing. He does everything he can to keep you alive. He's like a father to you. And I couldn't be happier for Haymitch to stand in for me," her dad says.

"He's a drunk." Katniss cries. Her father shook his head. She would say anything to get him to let her stay. To not feel pain anymore.

"You know that doesn't matter. He's never drunk enough not to be there for you. And he's smart. He understands you. And you hate it when he's right. So, trust him blindly. He will always protect you. And forgive your mother. She loves you so much. Your pain is her pain, and she feels everything. And let Prim grow up. Watching you in the Games changed her. Trust her with your secrets. She can handle them. Let Gale down easy, and stop being angry with him. He loves Prim like he loves Posy. He's been devastated since Prim died; he blames himself. You blame him. And it wasn't his fault. He helped with the bombing, but never would he have allowed Prim to be there. Coin used that against you. Forgive him," he said.

Katniss took a deep breath. Her baby sister. She knew deep down it wasn't Gale's fault, but she had to take it out somehow.

"And let yourself love Peeta," her father said. Katniss opened her eyes again, her breathing becoming faster.

"I know that loving him is hard because you're afraid of the future. You're afraid to get married and have children and watch them be reaped. But listen to me. Your children will never go into the Arena. The 75th Hunger Games is the last Hunger Games. I promise this Katniss. When you get scared, remember my words. Love Peeta. Don't be afraid to fall in love because you will have a happy ending. Don't be scared of this second chance. Have faith. Have patience. And be strong my beautiful Katniss," her father said. Katniss hugged him tightly.

"It won't be easy. It'll be hard. To go through this all again. But you'll have a far better life at the end of it. Trust that the people that you love will make it through. Trust that you won't lose them this time. Please trust me my beautiful, strong Katniss," It was starting to get very bright. Katniss shook her head and grabbed onto her father.

"No please daddy. Don't leave me. I love you please don't go. I need you," Katniss cried, holding on tightly.

"Everything happens for a reason. You were meant to be the change. The face of the rebellion. The Mockingjay. The Girl on Fire. Because you have goodness in you. And you are so strong. Find the strength Katniss. I promise. I promise with every fiber in my body that you'll find the strength to keep going. I love you," he said.

Katniss cried. She couldn't let him go. But she knew she had to. When she opened her eyes, she gasped and sat up.

No. She couldn't be back here. She tried to kill herself, and her father sent her back to District 12. Not only to District 12, but to the Seam. Back to her old house that they shared with their father.

She could see two lumps in her mother, and then in her sister's bed. Katniss shook her head. No this wasn't real.

She grabbed her clothes and boots and ran outside. The Seam? It wasn't burned down?

"Oh God," Katniss spun around and threw up. This wasn't happening. She wasn't back in the Seam. She had to figure out what to do. She stood up and threw her hands in the air, and let out a pathetic laugh, with tears.

"I'm going crazy. I've lost my mind. This is one of my nightmares," Katniss cried. She had to find Peeta and Haymitch. The Victor's Village was close to her. She ran to the Victor's Village and stopped in front of her house. She must have sleepwalked into the Seam. That must have been what happened.

But her old house was bombed. Nothing was left. She shook her head again. She must have just been sleep walking. She hadn't realized she was still crying. But she had felt the heat in the house when she killed herself. Her house was always so hot. And she felt the pain in her wrists. She knew she cut her wrists. And she felts her father's arms around her. She was really with her father.

"Katniss!" she heard her name being called. She turned around and saw Peeta running towards her. He was frantic.

Please don't let him hurt me.

"Peeta!" Katniss cried. She couldn't help herself. Peeta crashed into her. Hugging her, crying, and pulling her away and looking at her. Was he having a moment where he was himself again? Or would he try to kill her?

"I woke up in my bed at the Bakery. You were dead in my arms. I just got off the train and found you. You killed yourself and died in my arms. I don't get this. What happened? Are you ok?" Peeta cried. He grabbed her wrists and looked for the cuts.

"I don't know. I was just sitting in my house. I was…Oh God, it's my fault Snow captured and hijacked you. Everything's my fault and I just wanted it to end it and see Prim again, but I didn't see her. I did this so I could be with her again. Why am I back? I did it wrong," Katniss screamed. Peeta held her face trying to calm her.

"Katniss calm down please. I don't understand. Snow bombed my family's bakery. How could I wake up there?" Peeta asked.

"I don't know. I woke up in the Seam," Katniss cried. All of a sudden Haymitch's door slammed open and he came stumbling out. He charged over to them and grabbed Katniss' hands and examined them.

"You were on the ground. You were bleeding, what the hell happened?" Haymitch demanded.

"I don't know," Katniss cried. Haymitch yanked on both of them.

"Get in here," Haymitch said, and pulled them into his house. He waited till Peeta shut the door, to start talking again.

"You were bleeding on the ground. Just now! I was cleaning up the blood on the ground and trying to stand this boy up. He was having another episode. He was screaming that he was a mutt and thought he killed you! Then I open my eyes, and here I am. In my own house. And his painting isn't here," Haymitch said, pointing to an empty wall.

"Peeta painted a picture and hung it up when I brought you two home after the first Games. Where is it? Where the hell is it? And how the hell are you standing there alive?" Haymitch demanded.

"My leg," Peeta whispered. Haymitch and Katniss looked over at him. He bent down and pulled up his pant leg. Katniss gasped. His leg. His real leg was there. Katniss fell to her knees, grabbing Peeta's leg. She cried as she scratched and pulled at his leg.

"It's real. Oh my God. He told me I would get a second chance. He gave you your leg back," Katniss whispered. She cried and shook her head. "No this can't be real," she sobbed. Peeta grabbed her and pulled her to her feet. Peeta put his hands on her face to focus her and tried to get her to calm down. She was getting to wound up.

"Katniss. I need you to tell me what is going on," Peeta asked.

"I have a second chance. We have a second chance. To make things right. He gave me a second chance," Katniss cried.

"Who did? Katniss who gave you a second chance? None of this is making any sense," Peeta said.

"My dad. I saw him. He was in the woods. I said I wanted to be with Prim. He said he was giving me a second chance, and that everything would be ok. Your leg Peeta. The bakery and the Seam. They're all back," Katniss cried. Peeta and Haymitch looked at each other.

"I'm not crazy. I felt him. I felt him when he hugged me," Katniss and Peeta stared at each other for a minute. Peeta didn't know what to say. Haymitch was making noise behind them. He was looking for the remote to turn on the T.V.

"Haymitch really? You wanna watch T.V. now?" Peeta asked.

"I'm not watching it for fun. I'm looking for the date," Haymitch said. He flipped a channel and stared at it. He looked slowly back at them.

"What day is it?" Peeta asked. Haymitch just stood there, mouth fallen open. "Damn it Haymitch what day is it?" Haymitch slowly looked over at him, and Peeta thought he was gonna be sick.

"It's reaping day. For the 74th Hunger Games." Haymitch whispered. They all stood still. They had really just gone back in time. Katniss started shaking her head.

"No. No way am I doing this again! This isn't real. THIS ISN'T REAL!" Katniss screamed, yanking at her hair. Peeta wondered if this was what he looked like after he was hijacked.

"Katniss let's just…we just need to figure out what…" Peeta trailed off.

"What are we gonna do?" Katniss whispered to herself. But it was loud enough for Peeta and Haymitch to hear. Peeta took her arms and led her over to the couch to sit down. He kneeled down in front of her. She was in shock.

"I don't understand what is happening. So, I need you to explain it to me. How did this happen Katniss? One minute you were dead in my arms," Peeta choked out. He took a deep breath and got his voice back. "Then we all wake up on the day that we get Reaped. You have to explain this. What is going on? Start from the beginning," Peeta asked calmly.

"I was in the woods with my dad...I opened my eyes, and my dad was there. God this doesn't make sense!" Peeta felt that she was getting more worked up and would get nowhere with her if it got worse. But Peeta held her face in his hands.

"Katniss you have to calm down, and you have to keep talking. I don't know how much time we have, so you have to tell us everything you know," Peeta said. They were all startled by the phone ringing. It rang twice and then stopped. "I thought you yanked that thing out?" Peeta said.

"Effie always sends someone to come fix it right before the Games," Haymitch said quietly, staring at where the phone is. Peeta turned his attention back to Katniss.

"Keep going," Peeta told her.

"He told me that I was getting a second chance. That I could fix some things that went wrong. He said that Prim and everyone wasn't there, but I would see them soon," Katniss cried.

"Ok you get a second chance to change things? So, what we go back in time to the day we were reaped and do what?" Peeta asked. The phone rang twice again and then stopped. Peeta ignored it.

"I don't know how he did this. But he said I would have the life I deserved, that everything would be ok," Katniss whispered. Peeta could tell she was so confused. She was so disoriented. She was screaming one minute, crying the next, and shaking right after that. The phone rang two more times and then stopped.

"Haymitch what the hell is wrong with your phone?" Peeta demanded. Haymitch was still staring at it.

"I never answer my phone for the Capitol… But they usually wake me up every year. They ring twice and hang up...they take turns till I'm awake. I know it's them because they only ring twice," Haymitch said. Peeta and Katniss looked over to the phone as it rang twice again and stopped. Peeta knew that when Haymitch said "they", he wasn't talking about the Capitol. He was talking about his friends.

"Answer it Haymitch," Peeta told him. He nudged Haymitch forward towards the phone, only moving to get up and sit next to Katniss. She was shaking, so he wrapped his arms around her, and she clung to him. Only an hour before he was trying to shake away shiny images of Katniss trying to kill him, just so he could watch her die in his arms. He tried blinking tears away. Was he dreaming all this? Did he go so far into his mind, that he was imagining this? If he was, he wanted to stay here. Katniss was alive, and in his arms. He was brought out of his thoughts, as the phone rang again.

"Pick it up," Peeta told him. Haymitch picked it up, but slowly brought it to his ear.

"Hello?" Haymitch said. His voice was shaky, and he could tell whoever was talking to Haymitch, it had shaken him. "Yeah, I'm awake." he said quietly.

"I don't know...but I have some visitors here," he told the person on the phone. Peeta could feel Katniss trembling, and pulled her closer to him. Any closer, she would be in his lap.

"I kinda have an idea, but you'll have to wait till I see you in a couple of days to explain...it's good to hear your voice again," Haymitch choked out and hung up the phone. He stared at it.

"Who was it?" Peeta asked. Haymitch looked up at him.

"Finnick," Haymitch said. Katniss sprung up and ran to him.

"Is he alive? Does he remember? Please Haymitch call him back and let me talk to him," Katniss cried, pounding on Haymitch's chest. Peeta ran to her and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her back.

"It's ok now Katniss," Peeta soothed in her ear.

"We need to get out of this house. It isn't safe to talk in here. Let's go," Haymitch said, coming out of his stupor, and walking purposefully to the door. Peeta directed Katniss to the door and followed Haymitch. It was still dark outside.

"I needed to talk to him," Katniss whispered.

"Where are we going?" Peeta asked. Where was safe?

"We're going to Katniss' house in the Seam. There are always microphones in the Victor's house, but they never listen in unless they're suspicious or bored," Haymitch said, leading Peeta and Katniss to her house.

"They have no reason to listen in on our phone calls either. The Capitol knows Finnick and Chaff and all of them call my house to wake me up. But we have to be careful. In a few hours all eyes will be on me once the cameras get here. Then they'll be on you. They'll get suspicious if they see me with you both, and then you're reaped. Me and Peeta have to be back at our houses before the sun comes back up, which should be in about three hours. So, we have three hours to figure out what the hell we're gonna do. And three hours to wake up you up girl," Haymitch said, looking back at Katniss. If it weren't for Peeta pulling her along, Katniss would sit down right here in the street and sob.

"You're going to see Prim again Katniss. She'll be alright," Peeta told her, kissing her head. He couldn't stop touching her. He felt like the last time he really saw her was when she was walking away with Johanna in the Quarter Quell. He was hijacked by the time he saw her again. God, he missed her so much.

He never was able to talk to her about what she said on the beach, about her needing him. He never had a chance to ask anyone about that moment. If it was real or was something he made up in his head. He wanted to ask Katniss about it when he got back to 12. But she killed herself. But now there was no question. Yes, that moment on the beach where she kissed him, like she had never kissed him before, it was absolutely real. But now the real question. What did that moment mean?

Was it just something she said, as a way to give him some good lasting memory about them? Did she regret saying it now? Where was Gale? Why wasn't she with him now? He shook his head. Now was not the time for that.

"You don't know that" Katniss cried. He squeezed her tighter to his chest, walking awkwardly in this position.

"Yes, I do. Because my brother Ryee slept in my room last night. And he was in there asleep when I woke up. Prim will be there to," Peeta said. Ever since Peeta turned 12, Ryee and Wheet would sleep in his room the night before the Reaping. It was how they comforted Peeta. Wheet had slept in Peeta's room, but seeing as how he was finally over 18, he let Peeta and Ryee sleep in for as long as they could, and he opened the Bakery with his father.

How had this happened? What had happened? None of this felt real. No actually, it did feel real. He hadn't had a grip on reality in so long, ever since he was hijacked. He saw a shiny image of Katniss trying to kill him, and almost wanted to laugh. It wasn't real, and he knew it. He was in control of his emotions. He hadn't had a grip on reality in so long. He felt like he was here, like he was alive. He wasn't hijacked anymore.

Wait…he wasn't hijacked anymore. The thought startled him. He felt tears in his eyes. He could feel something.

"Haymitch," he whispered and was frozen. Haymitch turned around. Peeta's eyes welled up with tears. He could feel something. "I'm not hijacked," he shakily whispered. Haymitch's face softened and then he wiped his face. Now wasn't the time, but Haymitch was frozen. Haymitch nodded his head.

"We'll celebrate that later," he choked out. He looked at Katniss, but she didn't understand.

He would focus on himself later. He had to focus on Katniss. He was scared to admit that this was real, but he could feel it. But Katniss was losing it. He knew she had lost so much when she came home. She wouldn't talk, eat, drink or move. She had lost all hope and killed herself, and then saw her father. He had seen Katniss at her weakest moments before. But she had always gotten back up.

She wasn't getting up so easily this time and was afraid that if Katniss really did see her father, a damn was broken inside of her, that she had built up so high, that now it was crashing down around her, and was so afraid that three hours wasn't long enough to get her head back in the game. It made him shudder because this was a game. A Hunger Game.

As they walked closer to Katniss' house, they could see some candles burning, letting them know that her mother was awake. They must have been watching from the window because the door swung open. Katniss could see Prim, and her whole body shook. She couldn't walk, but Peeta held her tight.

"Come on we're almost there. Don't lose it out here," Peeta told her. Prim and her mother stepped out the door, but Haymitch caught them.

"Not out here. Come on," he told them, and ushered them inside. Peeta practically dragged Katniss into the house, and no sooner had Haymitch shut the door, that the sobbing began again.

It wasn't just from Katniss though. Prim and their mother added to the sobs. Prim ran and threw her arms around Katniss, and she fell to the ground. Sobbing into Prim's hair, apologizing. Peeta and Haymitch didn't dare move her just yet. Didn't make her get up and focus. Katniss died the day her sister was murdered. This really was her second chance. She needed to cry for Prim. She needed to feel it.

Peeta and Haymitch looked at each other. Both of them were getting choked up. Watching Katniss be reunited with her sister. The reason why Katniss ended up in the arena. All to save this beautiful little girl.

Haymitch patted his shoulder and looked up at him. Haymitch was losing the battle of being the strong one here. "Are you really ok?" he whispered. Peeta was relieved.

"I really am. I feel like me again. I haven't felt like me since the Quell," he whispered. Haymitch grabbed him tight and hugged him. What surprised Peeta, was that Haymitch cried into this shoulder.

"I'm so sorry boy," he whispered. Haymitch's shoulders shook. "A day hasn't gone by that I haven't regretted losing you. I'll never forgive myself," he whispered. But Peeta shook his head.

"You kept your promise to me Haymitch. That's all I could ask for. It was never your fault," he whispered back. Haymitch pulled back and grabbed Peeta's face. Haymitch was making sure he was really here.

"I missed ya kid," he said. Peeta nodded.

The women hadn't even noticed them. They were still crying on the floor. Katniss sobbing saying she was so sorry to Prim. She was sorry to her mom. Their mother crying that she was sorry. But they couldn't deny it. One good thing finally happened to Katniss. Her sister was alive.

"Katniss it's ok. It's ok. I'm here Katniss. I'm really here." Prim tried to soothe her.

"It was all my fault. I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry Prim. I tried to save you. But you still died," Katniss cried. Katniss' mother, Emily, kissed her forehead, and Katniss turned her head to finally look at her. She wrapped her other arm around her mom and cried in her shoulder. Peeta watched Katniss cling to her mother. Peeta and Haymitch eyed each other. Her mother was shocked to.

"I'm so sorry." she said to her mother. This was a change. Peeta looked at the time. 3:15 in the morning. The sun would be up in three hours. He didn't have the heart to break them up. After a few minutes, the sobbing lessoned, and Haymitch was the one to clear his throat.

"We don't have much time. We gotta focus here," Haymitch said. Emily stood up, and Peeta jumped to help the girls up. Katniss wouldn't let go of Prim.

"She's really here Katniss. She's ok," Peeta said, kissing the back of her head. God, it felt so freaken good to touch her.

"I'm ok now Katniss," Prim said. She pulled back, and they looked at Katniss face. Her eyes rolled around, and she would have fallen had Peeta now been there. Katniss fainted in his arms.

"KATNISS!" Peeta yelled, and sat on the floor, cradling Katniss. Her mother ran to the tub of water and got a cloth to wet. She put the dampened cloth on her daughter's head.

"Katniss it's ok. Your safe now. I'm here," Peeta whispered. Katniss opened her eyes, and he could see the fear in her eyes. He was sure now, that this was real. That she really did see her father, and that all her walls were broken down. He was seeing the real Katniss, of how scared and lonely she was. Katniss was so unbearably lonely.

"He told me I was safe with you," she whispered. Peeta's heart melted if that was even possible. Her father? He told her that? He would have thought her father would have chosen Gale. But Peeta? The baker's son? He felt more tears well up in his eyes, and he touched her face.

"You are safe with me Katniss. You just have to trust me. You have to trust that you'll be safe with me," he whispered to her. He wasn't sure if the others could hear him, but he didn't care. If they could, Katniss would be so embarrassed.

He stared into her eyes. And he watched for the first time, as she let something go. That she learned to trust someone. And it was him. She was trusting him.

"I trust you," she whispered back to him. He leaned down and hugged her. He hadn't hugged her in so long. The last time he felt something for her was when he watched her walk away with Johanna in the Quarter Quell. He may have come back to her in District 13 physically. But she lost Peeta the moment she walked away from him.

"Alright love birds. I don't want to break this up, trust me. But we don't have much time," Haymitch said. Peeta could tell he meant it, that he didn't want to break it up. But he knew it had to be done. He looked over at Haymitch and could see tears in his eyes. He realized it to about Katniss. That this was a different Katniss that we were seeing.

"I want to stay on the floor. My head is spinning," Katniss whispered. Peeta nodded, and situated themselves, so that he was sitting up against the wall, and she was cradled in his arms, laying in between his legs, with her leaning back against him. She held her head in her hands. Prim sat right next to him, so Katniss could face her. She grabbed onto Katniss's hands, and then locked eyes with Peeta. He didn't realize that Prim had tears in her eyes, and Prim laughed and touched his cheek.

"I can see your eyes again Peeta. It is so good to see you're ok," Prim cried. Peeta reached around, and hugged her, still holding on to Katniss with the other arm. He adored Prim. She would always talk to him when they were neighbors, even when Katniss wouldn't. And she would visit him in the hospital, even though he yelled and screamed at her. She stayed and held onto his hand. She pulled back and wiped her tears.

"You're really ok?" she asked. He nodded his head.

"Yeah, I am. Thank you," he told her. She smiled and nodded, and curled up into his other side, holding Katniss' hands again. Haymitch and Emily had joined them with chairs.

"I don't understand what is going on. How did this happen? I woke up here...this house was bombed...and Prim is so young...you all are," Emily said, referring to Katniss and Peeta.

"It's Reaping day. The day these two got picked," Haymitch said, jerking his head to Peeta and Prim. Emily gasped.

"How did this happen? How did we get back here?" Prim asked, looking at Haymitch.

"Don't look at me for that one. That would be your sister," Haymitch said. Prim looked back to Katniss.

"I saw dad," she whispered. Prim's eye widened, and her mother gasped, covering her mouth.

"How?" Emily asked. He rubbed Katniss' shoulders, and looked the other way. By killing herself that's how.

"In a dream we guess," Peeta said, facing the window. No one questioned it, so he cleared his throat and went on.

"She was at her lowest point after the war. None of us were there except for Haymitch. And her dad appeared to her in a dream or something," Peeta told them. He didn't think Katniss would want her sister or mother to know that she killed herself. Katniss looked down at her hands, embarrassed.

"What did he say?" her mother ask quietly. He felt Katniss turn her head to her mother, and he took a deep breath, and wiped the tears fast before they could see, and turned his head back to them. Emily had tears soaking her face, as she waited for an answer.

"He said we were getting a second chance," Katniss said. Everyone was quiet for a minute.

"A second chance to really take down the Capitol," Prim said. Everyone looked at her, and she looked like a kid on Christmas day as she saw all her presents from Santa. She looked at everyone and smiled.

"A second chance to take down the Capitol, and they'll never see it coming, because they don't know how tomorrow will end, but we know two year's worth of tomorrows will end," Prim said. It was the first time that that much clarity had come out since they came back. She looked at all of them.

"Don't you get it? We remember. But Snow doesn't. Neither does anyone on his side. We can win. We can get everyone out of District 12 before he bombs the District. You can save so many people now. And we can end this war quicker," Prim said. They all fell silent a moment, before Katniss sat up.

"How do you know all this?" Katniss asked. Prim smiled.

"Because I was there Katniss. I was there in the woods when you saw daddy. And he said goodbye to me to before you appeared," Prim said. All eyes were trained on her as she smiled.

"I thought it was a dream...but it was real. He was right. Everything will be ok. We'll all be ok. We have a second chance. And we can win," she said. And she held onto Katniss' hands. "And I won't get hurt this time. We can make this right," Prim said. Peeta was stunned. They had both seen their father. Katniss turned to Haymitch.

"What do we do first Haymitch?" Katniss asked. Haymitch let out a strangled laugh.

"What you're trusting me to make the plans now?" Haymitch asked. Katniss let more tears fall.

"I'm trusting you blindly Haymitch. I'll do whatever you say," Katniss said. Haymitch stared at Katniss, then at Peeta.

"Well then. First things first," he stood up and walked over to the three of them sitting on the floor.

"Take a deep breath and stand up," Haymitch told her. Prim and Peeta helped her stand up. She faced Haymitch, and he wrapped his arms around her. Peeta knew he wanted to say something about her slitting her wrists, but wouldn't in front of Prim or her mother, but he knew that Haymitch just needed to hug her. After a moment, he pulled away and stared at her.

"Get ready. Pull yourself together and get some of that strength back. You can do this...we have some plans to make. And it starts with going back into the Hunger Games,"

"No Haymitch I can't," Katniss cried. Peeta held on to her. "I'm not going into another arena,"

"Katniss it's ok. I'll be right there with you," Peeta told her. She shook her head.

"No, I am not letting Rue die all over again. I can't do that. I'll die. I'll let her live. I won't let them kill her again. I can't please don't make me," Katniss cried as she backed away from all of them. Peeta tried to comfort her, but Haymitch was having none of it. He rushed to the other side of the room and made her straighten up and face him.

"You will not die in that arena. Your father gave you a second chance to what? Die sooner? Never have a rebellion? If you die in that arena, all hope is gone. We failed and never even tried. You'll go back in there Katniss," Haymitch said. Shaking her. Peeta knew when he said, die sooner, that he was referring to her killing herself. Just that morning in fact. Peeta stood between the two and made Haymitch let go of her.

"Fighting won't help. We don't have much more time," Peeta said.

"We have to do everything the same, because we don't know what else to do," Haymitch told her.

"Katniss it will be ok. Rue will be ok," Prim said. Katniss looked over at her.

"She'll die in my arms again. I can't live through that again. I won't watch her die again," Katniss cried. Prim went over, and grabbed Katniss' hand, and placed it on her own heart. Prim held the hand that was on Katniss' own chest.

"She will die in your arms. But trust, in here, in your heart, that everything will be ok. They'll find a way to save her. But Haymitch is right. You have to do everything the same. All of Panem is watching you, and everything you did in the arena, is what gave everyone hope. A big part of that was how you treated Rue, and how you loved her. It's not going to be easy Katniss, but trust in your heart, that she will be ok," Prim said.

Peeta couldn't believe how wise this young girl was. She was in a 12-year-old body, but she was really almost 15 years old. She had watched her sister live through two arena's and she herself went through a war. Prim was all grown up, even if the rest of the world didn't know it. What surprised him the most, was that Katniss seemed to be listening to her.

"You'll cry, and don't hide it. Your tears gave the Districts hope. That she wasn't just a little girl in their Games. She meant more than that. You'll cry, you'll be sad. But you need to be strong. Because you'll have to save Peeta all over again. You can do this Katniss," Prim said.

"How do I live through that nightmare all over again? I can't," she whispered.

"The sun will be up soon. We need to leave," Haymitch said. He turned to Emily and placed his hand on her shoulder. "I'll bring your daughter home again. I promise," he told her. She nodded, and he went over to Katniss. He placed his hands on the back of her neck and touched his forehead against hers.

"Breathe sweetheart. Me and the boy will be there every step of the way. Don't lose the faith," he said. He pulled back and looked at Peeta. "Come on," he said. Peeta shook his head.

"I can stay a little longer. The cameras won't be on me until my name is called. I'll sneak around the Seam to go back home. It won't be that noticeable if I'm around. I'm just a kid. I'm just the baker's son. I'm no one right now," Peeta told him. Haymitch nodded and he grabbed him and pulled him to his ear.

"Get her ready for this. She's not herself and hasn't been herself in a long time. She did all this because she lost you. Make sure she knows she's not gonna lose you again," he whispered and pulled away. Peeta nodded. "I'll see you in a few hours," Haymitch said, and left. Peeta looked out the window and watched him leave. The sun was just starting to show.

"Come in the other room Prim. Let's get you washed up," her mother said, and guided Prim out of the room. Peeta and Katniss faced each other.

"My mind is all clear," Peeta said. Katniss just stared at him.

"I never felt like I was really there. I couldn't figure out what was real and what was fake. It was the scariest thing in my life to not know who I was anymore," Peeta confided in her. He could see the fear in her eyes. Of what he was going to say.

"But I woke up in my childhood bed...and I know what reality really is," Peeta said, trying to find his voice. He looked down and rubbed his eyes, willing himself not to cry. God he was ok. He was in control of his mind. He was in control of himself. He took a deep breath and looked back up.

"I know everything they did to me, and I still have those images in my head, of what they tried to make me believe about you...but it's all clear to me Katniss. I know who you are. I know the difference. I can feel again. I'm myself again. I'm not hijacked anymore," he admitted. She let out a sob and threw herself into his arms. "It's ok now Katniss. I'm back,"

"I am so sorry I left you. I never should have separated from you in the arena. I should have made them get you out sooner. And I shouldn't have abandoned you when you came to 13. I am so sorry Peeta," Katniss cried. Squeezing him tightly.

"It wasn't your fault. I'm ok. I'm here now, and I'm not going anywhere, anytime soon. You're safe I promise," Peeta said. Katniss shook her head.

"I was by myself this morning. You were in the Capitol. I just want everything to stop," she whispered. He made her sit down and he knelt down in front of her.

"Katniss…I don't know what happened. I don't get how it happened. But we're here. We've started all over again. The scars that we had on our bodies aren't there anymore. My brain Katniss," he said and made her look at him.

"My brain has never. EVER. Had trackerjacker venom touch it. This body has never had trackerjacker venom inside of it. I'm ok Katniss. I'm right here. I'm right in front of you," he told her. Tears fell down her cheeks as Katniss pulled back and looked at him.

"I never told you Peeta. I was too afraid. And I'm still afraid to say it...there's so much I want to tell you-"Katniss tried to say, but Peeta shushed her with his finger to her lip.

Was she going to say that she loved him? Don't think like that. She doesn't love you like that. She loves you, but at most, it's just a friend. Whatever it actually was, it was important to her. But it should wait.

"Tell me when we're happy. Tell me when you're not crying. If you're crying it should be happy tears. Don't say it out of fear, or regret. Say it because you mean it. We get a second chance to make everything right. Don't say anything to me out of fear, regret or obligation. Say all these things to me that you want to say, when the time is right, and because you feel safe and happy," Peeta told her. Katniss stared at him for a minute and then closed her eyes.

"Kiss me Peeta," she whispered, and then opened her eyes. "Kiss me, because the last kiss I got was when we were hiding in the Capitol, and it was to calm you down. Kiss me because the last real kiss I got from you was on the beach, and the whole world could see, and I want a real kiss from you with no one watching," she whispered.

He hadn't thought about that. All their kisses had been watched. They had never kissed when they were alone.

It was the most powerful thing she had ever said to him, and he smiled. He kissed her softly at first and pulled back. They looked at each other, and then wrapped their arms around each other to kiss again. Her lips were so soft, and salty from all her tears. He loved her. And he had missed her so much. Katniss was alive, and in his arms again.

He reached between them and used his thumb to pull her mouth open a little. He slowly slipped his tongue into her mouth and touched hers. They had never kissed like this before. He wondered if it was ok, but then felt Katniss tangle her hands in his hair, and pull him closer, never letting him go. His arms clawed at her back, and their tongues fought for dominance over the kiss.

He was back. Her Peeta was back. She was going into the Hunger Games today, for a third time, but here in this moment, she had never in her life felt safer. Peeta made her feel safe. Her father was right. She was meant to be with Peeta. She just had to trust him. Trust Haymitch and Prim. She dare say, that she even felt happy. She hadn't felt like this in so long. She hadn't felt Peeta's lips on her in so long, or his arms wrapped around her.

She felt that hunger again. That hunger she felt in the cave, and on the beach. She knew what that hunger was now. She was in love with Peeta, and she wanted to be with him. That hunger was to go further than just kissing. She knew it now. But she knew they couldn't do this now. Peeta pulled back reluctantly, out of breath, and pressed his forehead against hers. He let out a chuckle.

"I don't want to do anything in the Capitol, where cameras can see us, and microphones can hear us, but when we get back here Katniss Everdeen, I want you all to myself. I want to pick this up exactly where we left off," Peeta said huskily. Katniss felt shivers down her spine. He pulled back and made her look at him. He kissed her again. Hard on the mouth and pulled back.

"I don't want to go, but I know that I have to. Haymitch is right. We can't let anyone see us just yet. There will be cameras all around here once the sun rises," Peeta said. Katniss shook her head.

"I can't do this again. I can't go through all this all over again. I won't make it," she whispered.

"Look at me," he said gently, and she opened her eyes, letting a tear fall down her face. He smiled sadly and wiped her tear away. "You can do this. I know you can. We'll make it through this Katniss,"

"This time, when you tell me you'll see me in a few hours, you'll mean it. You'll get ready, you'll go to the Reaping, you'll volunteer for Prim, we'll say our goodbyes to our family, and we'll be on the train again. It will be ok. You can do this. I'll be with you the whole time I promise," Peeta said. Katniss nodded again, and he smiled. "So, tell me," Peeta said. Katniss cleared her throat.

"I'll see you in a few hours Peeta," Katniss said. Peeta smiled and kissed her again.

"Yes, you will," he said. He gave her another kiss, and turned around, and walked out the door. He was gone, but Katniss knew, she trusted her dad that she was really going to see him again. And she did as she was told. She got ready for the Reaping. She had the most surreal morning with Prim and her mother. She had lost Prim. The beautiful golden child that was burnt to death, was standing in front of her. Prim was practically bathing and dressing her. Her mother had left for a little bit, only to come back 30 minutes later. Katniss could smell it. She was making coffee. She thrust the cup into her hands.

"You need some caffeine. You need to wake up a bit. We'll be ok remember? That money won't matter by the time you come back. So, drink up. I bought some eggs while I was out. You need something in your stomach," her mother said.

"I can eat on the train though. Save it for you and Prim," she said. She was so used to trying to take care of them. Her mother smiled and placed her hand on her cheek. "I know you'll eat on the train. But you need something in your stomach now. To get you to the train. I don't want you fainting again," she said. Prim was out feeding Lady, leaving Katniss and her mother alone. She watched her mom start scrambling her eggs.

"I never understood why you became depressed after dad died," she said. Her mom stopped moving for a moment, but then continued stirring the eggs. "And I was so angry at you," her mom looked at her sadly.

"And now I get it," she cried softly. Her mom kissing the side of her head.

For months, her mother sat in her chair, staring off into space. Katniss was the one that took care of her and Prim. She just never got it. Until she came home after the war. She sat in the chair, staring into space.

"He told me everything happens for a reason...and I think that when you were depressed...it was to make me strong," Katniss said. Her mother looked up at her with tears.

"It taught me to survive, and it made me strong enough to survive in the Games...I'm sorry I hated you for so long. But I don't hate you anymore. I'm so sorry for pushing you away, and hurting you mom," she whispered. Katniss' mother grabbed her and hugged her tightly, letting out a sob.

"I am so sorry for not being stronger. I just loved him so much, and the grief took over. I'm so, so sorry Katniss," she cried. Katniss pulled away.

"I know how it feels...it's what happened when Peeta..." Katniss trailed off. Her mother nodded.

"You were all alone. I know Katniss, I'm so sorry. I should have gone home with you…I always just let my grief take over me. I never put you first and for that I am so ashamed, and I am so sorry," she cried. But Katniss shook her head.

"He gave us a second chance," Katniss said. Her mother nodded her head. She held Katniss' hands tightly.

"This time Katniss…your father is giving me a second chance to. I promise. I promise you; I'll be strong for you. I won't let you down," she whispered and hugged her.

Peeta had taken the long way home, trying to sneak around a few homes in the Seam. To be honest, he wasn't too familiar with the Seam, never spending too much time there. But he kept quiet, and kept his head down, and made it home. He looked at the back of the bakery. His home. It was really here. His family were alive. He had a chance to save them now. He got choked up just staring at his home.

"Thanks Mr. Mellark," he heard someone say. He knew that voice all too well. He saw Gale coming out the back door and startled when he saw Peeta. Peeta just stared at him. He was in love with Katniss. Would he try and take her away from him? God if he remembered, would he volunteer for Peeta when his name was called? He suddenly felt is whole body go ice cold.

"Why are you staring at me?" Gale demanded. Peeta continued to stare. "Can you move out of the way so I can get by?" he demanded. Peeta moved and let Gale by. Gale looked back at him once, and then kept walking, shaking his head. He was heading towards the woods. Gale had no idea. None whatsoever.

"I wondered when you'd come back," he heard his father say. He was standing in the doorway, just staring. His dad. His dad was alive. He had to make sure his family stayed alive.

"It's ok Peeta. I remember everything," his father said. Peeta's eyes widened, and he lunged forward and hugged his dad. "It's ok son. Everything will be ok," his father said.

"I'm so sorry I couldn't save you. I'm sorry I failed you and let you die. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough," Peeta cried. His father pulled back and made him look at him.

"You did nothing wrong. I have never been prouder of someone in my life," his father said. Peeta saw his brothers over his dad's shoulder, listening. They smiled at him, and he went running for them and hugged them.

"I remember this loud noise. I saw all this fire outside my window, and then nothing," his brother Ryee said. Peeta pulled back and looked at him. "We died. I know that we did. And I wake up and I'm fine. And it's the day of the Reaping all over again. How did this even happen?" Ryee asks. Peeta looks at his family.

"We were given a second chance to make everything right. So today, I'm going back into the Hunger Games," Peeta said.

"How did this happen though? How did we just go back in time? It's not even possible," Wheet said. He didn't get a chance to answer his oldest brother.

"Did that Seam boy come from this house?" he heard his mother yell. She came down the stairs and saw all four of them huddled by the door. "What on earth are you all just standing around for. It's Reaping day. That means everyone gets all happy and excited that their children aren't going to die so they celebrate and buy them treats. Bread! Move your butts and start baking," his mother said and turned around. His mother didn't remember. That was ok because he was still going to save her anyway.

"There, now you look beautiful to," her mother said. Katniss smiled at her mother. Prim walked into the room behind them. Katniss turned around and hugged Prim.

"You look beautiful to little duck," she whispered. Prim hugged her tighter.

"You'll be fine Katniss. You'll be home in a few weeks, and Rue and everyone else will be alive. Just have faith," Prim said. The knocking on the door startled them. They stared at it for a moment.

"No one came to the door last time. Who could that be?" Katniss asked frantically. She just couldn't shake this. She was never this weak. Well, that wasn't true. She was weak.

"It's alright. It's probably just Peeta," Prim said. She walked over to the door and opened it.

"Hey Prim. Is Katniss home?" she heard Gale ask. Katniss froze. Prim opened the door, and let Gale in. "Hey are you ok? You weren't in the woods," Gale said.

Katniss knew instantly that he had no idea. He had no idea that Prim and Peeta were about to be reaped, and that she would go into the Games to spare her little sister's life. He had no idea that this had already happened. He had been the reason that her sister had died. Her father's words rang in her ear. Love Peeta, trust Haymitch, let Prim grow up, forgive her mother, and forgive Gale.

"Are you ok?" Gale asked. Katniss shook her head and cleared her throat.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm sorry I had to stay with Prim," she said. Gale nodded and he looked down at her and squeezed her shoulder.

"Don't worry Prim. It's your first year. A lot of the girls have their names in it a bunch of times. One of theirs will be picked. You'll be ok. And Mr. Mellark said I could come back later and get a cupcake. It'll have your name written all over it," Gale told her. Prim leaned forward and hugged him.

"Thank you, Gale," she said, and then she walked away from them and left them alone.

"She's really worried about the Reaping," Katniss said. Gale nodded again.

"I know you are to. But like I said her names only in there one time. The chances of her name being pulled out-"

"Is high," Katniss blurted out. She didn't mean to, but it was the truth. It never matters how many times your name goes into that bowl. The odds are never in anyone's favor. They can be in there 50 times, or only once.

"She'll be fine Catnip. And I'll go hunting later. Bring her home something good. Maybe I can find her a rabbit. She loves rabbit stew. She'll be just fine," he told her. Katniss nodded. "Are you ok? You seem pretty freaked out,"

"It's her first year. It's got me spooked," Katniss said, trying to look anywhere but at him.

"I know how you feel. It's Rory's first year to," Gale said. She looked at him then. That's right, it was his little brothers first time to. "I should get going. I'll see you later though," he told her. She nodded, and she left. Prim came back out to her and held her hand.

"He'll be ok to you know Katniss," she whispered. Katniss nodded, and hugged her little sister close again. Prim pulled back after a few minutes and held her hand. Katniss was shaking. She remembered feeling like this when Cinna hugged her, and she entered the arena the first time.

"It'll all be ok Katniss. Just hold my hand," Prim squeezed her hand.

Peeta waited in the square to see her. He just wanted to see her, to reassure her that everything was going to be ok. He saw Gale walking with his little brother Rory. Rory looked so scared. But who wasn't? The first time was always the worst, but it got better. For some anyway. He waited a few minutes with his brother Ryee standing next to him. His parents, and his other brother Wheet, were already standing with the other families. He saw Katniss walking, with Prim holding her hand. He went to walk over to them, but Ryee held his arm.

"Just stay here. No one knows you've ever even talked before," Ryee said. Peeta nodded. It was true. Going and hugging Katniss right now would raise suspicion.

"When you get home, you'll explain how all this happened right?" Ryee asked. Peeta nodded and fought against running over to her. Katniss and Prim saw them though and nodded. He watched Prim give him a small smile, but then headed to the sign in table.

"You can do this Katniss. Just like last time," Prim whispered in her ear when Katniss hugged her. She pulled back. "I'll be alright. Just give them a little drama. Let me make it close to the stage before you run out. Just follow my lead and take a deep breath," Prim coached her.

"I should be the one comforting you, not the other way around," Katniss said.

"You did. And I made it through that day. So, let me get you through this day," Prim said. They all took their places. Katniss looked for Peeta, and she wasn't disappointed. She found him, and he gave her that reassuring smile.

"Just breath," he mouthed to her. She nodded. Something caught her eye, and she turned to see Gale. He smiled at her.

"You ok?" he moved. She nodded her head. She didn't pay attention to Effie coming out. She was eccentric as ever. It gave her some comfort watching Effie. Would she remember to? She did end up being a part of the rebellion.

Katniss wondered when Effie had changed. Or even how deep she was into all the Capitols views. Did she enjoy escorting two children around for a couple weeks every year, only to watch them be slaughtered, and never return again? Or were her and Peeta the only two that she loved? When did Effie change? She never even thought to ask. She never asked Effie about herself. But that was because Katniss was selfish.

She heard Effie say "Welcome, Welcome!" Katniss had heard this all before and watched the movie before. Heard the Mayor give the speech before. And even watched Haymitch fall off the stage before. Wait what? He was drunk?

She turned to move, but Peeta's face stopped her. He shook his head. She couldn't come to his rescue. It was a knee jerk reaction with Haymitch. Did he do that on purpose? How could he already start drinking? What had he been doing these past few hours? That drunken bastard. And her father trusted him?

When they pulled him back on stage, something weird happened. Haymitch laughed, and then bowed. He hadn't done that last time. He hadn't fallen off the stage until she was already up there. What the hell was he doing?

"I'm fine I'm fine! Nobody worry, my suit is just fine," Haymitch laughed and then he sat down, practically assaulting Effie again and trying to kiss her.

He was faking. She looked back at Peeta, and he was shaking his head in disbelief. He too couldn't believe what he had just seen. Haymitch really was about doing everything the same. He was playing out his drunken lush role to perfection. The time came for Prim's name to be called. She stared at Peeta. He was there, with a smile.

"Just breath," he mouthed to her again.

"Primrose Everdeen," Effie said. She went to jump, but Peeta shook his head.

"Keep looking at me," he mouthed slowly. Katniss just kept staring at him. She knew Prim was slowly moving. She knew she had to wait. Just wait to move. Peeta's eyes never left hers. "Now," he mouthed. Katniss walked past the other kids, everyone moving out of her way.

"Prim!" Katniss yelled. Prim looked back at her, frightened.

"I VOLUNTEER!" she screamed. Pushing the Peacekeepers away that were holding her back. "I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTE!" Katniss screamed. Katniss ignored everything around her as Prim came running up to her and cried. "Prim go find mom, " Katniss cried.

"No." Prim cried.

"Prim go find mom I'm so sorry." Katniss cried. These tears were real. Everything she felt was real. How could she live through hearing her sisters name being called twice? She heard Prim screaming as Gale pulled her away. The Peacekeepers brought her up on stage. Haymitch nodded to her. She was doing great. She barely paid any attention to Effie talking to her. But she heard Effie call his name.

"Peeta Mellark," Effie called out. She tried to see him, but he was too far away to see. She saw him being ushered up on stage but didn't look at him.

"Well HAPPY HUNGER GAMES!" Haymitch yelled as he wrapped his arm around Katniss' shoulder. "And the odds were NOT in their favor," Haymitch laughed, stumbling into the mayor. "Are those my pants?" Haymitch asked him.

They were ushered away again, and she felt Peeta wrap his finger around one of hers. He didn't want anyone to see. They were escorted into two different rooms, and she waited for her mother and Prim. As soon as she came in, Prim barreled over to her. She knew how Prim felt. This was the third time this was happening. It was too much. She felt her mother's arms go around her.

"We'll be fine Katniss. Gale will bring us game. We'll be ok here. You'll be home soon," Her mother soothed.

"I don't want to do this," she admitted softly. She couldn't control her body. It was shaking uncontrollably. Prim and her mom pulled back.

"I wish I could do this for you. I never wanted this for you…I wish I could make up for all the pain I caused you by taking your place. But please just remember, we do win in the end," her mom whispered.

There wasn't much more to say. They were taken away from her, and it broke Katniss' heart. She just got her sister back, how could she just let her go?

Peeta's father came in next. She swallowed the lump in her throat as he sat down next to her and handed her a box of cookies. "I'm sorry this happened to you. And Peeta," he said.

"He's a good man," she whispered to him. Peeta's father smiled.

"Just take care of him," he said. She nodded her head. "Thank you." he whispered to her. Katniss stared at him. Thank you? He knew. Peeta's father nodded.

"Will you eat those this time?" he asked. She let out a shaky breath. "Keep your chin up. Just like your father always did," Peeta's father said and turned to leave but she stopped him.

"She told me. Last time…Prim told me you left food for her and my mother on the front step. Thank you," she whispered. He smiled and left.

Gale came in next, and this time, she knew something was different. "How?" Gale asked. Katniss gasped.

"You remembered?" she asked. He looked around.

"I was drinking coffee. I was sitting at the table, drinking coffee, and talking to Posy. We were in District 2. Posy was telling me some story, and then...I'm standing there, watching you and him, get taken away," Gale said. Katniss sat down and looked at her hands. Had he remembered before this, there was a chance that he would have volunteered for Peeta. Would have taken his place.

"I'm so sorry Gale," she said, and looked up at him. "Haymitch is working on a plan. We just came back here ourselves. We were given a second chance to make things right," Katniss says. He storms over to her and bends down.

"Do we get a second chance to Katniss?" he asked. She knew he wanted to kiss her, so she stood up and put distance between them. She looked outside the window.

"We all get a second chance Gale. I have so many things I have to make right. And so many people I need to keep alive," she said. She turned back and looked at him. She had to set the record straight.

"I'm sorry that I ever blamed you for her death..." Katniss trailed off. Gale looked down at the floor.

"That was so cruel and unfair to put that weight on your shoulders. You never deserved that," she told him and wiped her eyes.

"You love Prim like a sister. Like you do Posy. And to think you would ever put her in harm's way...it was so wrong for me to say that you. To make you think and feel like it was your fault… I'm sorry Gale. I'm so sorry and I hope that you forgive me," she said. He looked up, and she knew he wanted to say something, but she didn't want him to.

"We do get a second chance Gale. A second chance to make our relationship right. I should have from the very beginning. But I was scared, and confused, and I should never have led you on," she said. His smile started to fade.

"I never knew I was leading you on. I was so confused. My whole life I was…We get a second chance as friends. You were meant to be with someone else Gale...just like I was meant to be with someone else. We were only meant to be friends. And you'll always be my best friend. If you let me. If you can forgive me," Katniss says.

He looked devastated. She never gets to hear his response because he's being taken away. Soon, she's in the car with Effie, as she talks on and on and on about chandeliers and platinum doorknobs. Peeta smiles at her. They just have to get passed Effie. Just get on the train, get away from her and she can breathe. They're taken to the train, and Effie continues her blathering, when Haymitch comes in. He sits down with his drink, that Katniss can tell is not alcohol, and Effie gets up. She slides the door, pulls the shades, and spins on them.

"What in the God's good name is going on?" she demands. The three of them stare at her. "It was all I could do to just stand there and pull your names out of that bowl and not cry. I cannot keep pulling your names out, I just can't. My heart can't handle that," she choked up and then spun around to Haymitch, pointing her finger at him.

"And to get assaulted twice by you? You weren't even drunk. How on earth is this all happening?" Effie cried. They all stared at her, and at each other, and started smiling. "Why are you all smiling at me? I can't keep doing this. This is very unprofessional," she cried.

All three stood up and hugged her. Laughing. Effie remembered them. "Get off of me you'll ruin my dress," she cried. They let her go but stood there.

"Guess the team really is back together," Peeta said and nudged Effie.

"Great, more gold jewelry," Haymitch grumbled.

"We get a second chance Effie," Peeta told her and smiled brightly.

They ended up having to explain a few things to Effie. She was right in the middle of Capitol gossip. If anyone was going to find out any real gossip, it would be her. She'd keep her eyes opened for them in the Capitol.

"So, what do we do now Haymitch?" Peeta asked. They all waited for him to answer.

"Right now, the only plan is, to act normal. Like you did before," Haymitch said.

"That's a terrible plan," Katniss said. Haymitch snorted.

"Well at least you're not crying anymore. You're back to your usual pleasant self," he told her. She rolled her eyes.

"That's why you threw yourself off stage? So, you can act normal?" Katniss asked. Haymitch laughed.

"Exactly. I don't know how far this has gone yet. The only people I know, who even know what is going on, is us and your mom and sister," Haymitch said, pointing to Katniss.

"My dad and brothers remember to," Peeta said. Haymitch nodded, forgetting his phone call.

"Actually, so does Finnick, Mags, Annie, and the other Victors from 4,." Haymitch said. Katniss gasped.

"How do you know Annie and Mags do? Are you sure? Did you talk to him again?" Katniss babbled. Peeta pulled her back in her seat.

"Hey it's ok Katniss," Peeta told her.

"But you only talked to him for less than a minute." Katniss cried.

"He called from the Justice building in District 4. He had been up for a little while. Me and Finnick have been speaking in code for years. We know how to get every important detail into a sentence that makes no sense to anyone else. And Mags is staying home with Annie. Finnick will be there as mentor. They keep all the other District 4 Victors home. The Capitol doesn't like old, crazy and ugly Victors. And District 4 has five of those staying put," Haymitch said. Katniss put her elbows on her knees, and her face in her hands and cried.

"Oh, thank God," Katniss cried. Peeta rubbed her back.

"Shhh. Everything's going right on plan," Peeta said. Katniss sat up.

"Plan? What plan? There is no plan except act like we did before," Katniss cried, mocking Haymitch.

"Sounds like the best plan to me," Haymitch said. Katniss narrowed her eyes at him.

"Remember, people don't let you make the plans, because your plans at suck," Haymitch joked, and took a sip of his drink. His eyes narrowed at it. He must have forgotten it was water.

"That isn't a plan. That's crap," Katniss hissed. Peeta took her hand in both of his and rubbed them back and forth.

"Trust me sweetheart. I got this," he told her. Katniss closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Trust Haymitch blindly. Her father's words echoed inside her head.

"Now eat something will ya? Put some meat back on those bones. You'll need it for the Games," he ordered her.

Katniss shook her head and buried her face in her hands and leaned her elbows on her knees. This wasn't really happening. She was going to open her eyes, and she'd still be sitting in front of her fireplace. Prim would still be dead. And Peeta would still be hijacked.

Haymitch was right though. With everything he said. But Katniss would never admit it. Effie let the train crew back in, and they were served lunch. One thing that Katniss could never deny, the food was amazing. She ate as much as she could, but only until she felt her stomach physically hurt, did she stop.

Katniss found it very odd that Haymitch pretended to be drunk. She saw him drink some alcohol, but not his usual amount. He had a glass of water right there with him. She had to admit though. If Haymitch was going for normal, he needed to be drunk!

Katniss didn't offer any conversation. She wanted this all to be over. It was finally over, and now she was reliving it all again. She had to go through two arenas again and a war? How could anyone ask her to do this all over again? How could her father do this to her?

She was being punished. She killed herself, and now she was reliving this all over again. And every time, it would end more horrible than the last time. It was her punishment to always lose Peeta and Prim.

Peeta lightly placed his hand on her shoulder. "Katniss," he whispered, and she jumped out of her chair and backed into the wall. Almost knocking an Avox down.

"YOU'RE A MUTT LEAVE ME ALONE!" Katniss screamed. Peeta's eyes widened. Effie gasped and Haymitch was the one that pushed the Avox out of the dining cart. Peeta stood up slowly.

"Katniss you're ok. It's just me," Peeta whispered. She started crying and shook her head.

"Sweetheart it's ok. He's not a mutt," Haymitch whispered to her. She covered her face with her hands and cried. Peeta, Haymitch and Effie all just stared at each other. What were they going to do?

Katniss slid down the wall and cried into her hands, bringing her knees up to her chin. Peeta bent down and placed his hand softly on hers.

"Katniss it's me. I won't hurt you," Peeta whispered to her. She slowly picked her head up to look up at him. "It's me. It's really me. I'm not hijacked," he reminded her. She leaned forward and wrapped her arms around his waist.

It absolutely broke his heart to hear her call him a mutt. For her to be scared that he was going to hurt her. He would have nightmares for the rest of his life of when he tried to kill her. The sound of her voice when she was afraid of him. He'd never get that sound out of his head.

"What are we going to do about her?" Effie whispered to Haymitch. He stared at her for a moment.

"I'll get back to you on that," he said and put his hand under one of her elbows. "Come on. Let Peeta take you to your room," Haymitch told her as he and Peeta pulled her to stand up. He gently turned her towards the hallway.

Peeta walked with Katniss down to her room and shut the door behind them. They were alone. It was the first time they had been alone. Was it only this morning that she had seen him again? She hadn't seen this boy in months, and the last time...was in the Capitol.

"What are you thinking?" he asked her. Katniss sat down on the bed, and he sat next to her.

"I was sitting in the rocking chair, staring at the wall only this morning," she said flatly. Staring at the wall again. "I just wanna go back to staring at the wall. I didn't have to feel anything," she admitted. He gulped.

Just a few hours ago his whole world ended. Katniss died in his arms. Her depression took over her body, and her depression won. It rotted her for months, and then it killed her.

"When did you come back?" she asked. Peeta knew what she meant. When did he come back to District 12.

"Just this morning. I just got off the train. Haymitch met me, and we walked to your house," he said quietly. Katniss nodded. "There's a lot to talk about Katniss." he said.

She turned and looked at him. "We never had a chance to resolve anything from the 75th Games. We were separated, and they captured me," he said but stopped. She closed her eyes. He knew she didn't want to remember this.

"And I was never the same when I came back to you in 13...and when I was in the Capitol for five months, I come back and you're on the ground..." he choked out. He scrubbed his face with his hands. "We have so much to talk about Katniss. I want to know what happened. Why you tuned out the world. I know losing Prim was too much...but you said you couldn't live without me," he said.

Katniss let tears fall down her face as she started to cry. Peeta looked up and pulled her to him. "It's ok Katniss. I'm right here," he told her.

"I didn't know you were coming back. I thought I'd never see you again. And it was all my fault. I never should have separated from you in the Quarter Quell. He hurt you because of me. Everything you went through was my fault," she cried. He pulled her back to look at him.

"It wasn't your fault. You have to let that guilt go. I'm right here. I'm sitting right in front of you. And I'm alive. And I'm ok. I'm not hijacked anymore," he said, and then leaned in and kissed her. She let out a sob and pulled back. He pulled her back into a hug.

"You're exhausted Katniss. When was the last time you slept?" he asked.

"I don't know. I hate going to sleep. I'm so afraid of the nightmares," she said.

"Well then. Let's go to sleep now. I'm right here. I'll keep your nightmares away," he said. He helped maneuver her into the bed, and under the covers. They were both still in their clothes, but neither of them cared. She curled her body around him, burying her face in his neck.

"We have so much to talk about Katniss. And we will. When we come back home. We'll have all the time in the world. But you're safe now Katniss. Go to sleep. I'll be right here the whole time," he said, and kissed her forehead. And for the first time, since the nights before the Quell, when he would hold her while she slept, she finally fell asleep, without nightmares.

"Time to get up. We have a BIG, BIG day!" he heard Effie through the door. He felt Katniss start to stir, and she slowly opened her eyes. Peeta smiled down at her.

"Good morning," he whispered. Katniss looked at her surroundings, and her eyes widened in fear. Her breathing became very rapid as she started to freak out. "Hey, hey, hey, it's alright Katniss," Peeta said trying to grab her and calm her. Katniss started to scream a little, but Peeta pulled her to his chest.

"Katniss you're safe. I'm right here it's ok...It's ok Katniss," he soothed her. She started slowing down her struggling against him. "I know this is scary. You just woke up. We're on the train again. It isn't a dream. We're fixing everything. We get a second chance. It's alright," Peeta soothed. Katniss grabbed at him and held on tight. He kissed the top of her head.

"It's alright I got you. I'm right here. You're safe with me," Peeta said.

"We're not safe. We're going back into the Games. No one's safe in the Capitol," she whispered. He kissed her head again and rocked her.

"But like Prim said, they don't know what will happen tomorrow, but we know what two years worth of tomorrows are. Everything will be alright Katniss," Peeta told her and kissed her head again. He couldn't stop kissing her and touching. This was the most he had ever been with her like this. And she wanted him to keep touching her and kissing her. This was what he always wanted.

He would just hold onto this feeling. Because once they were back in District 12…he was going to lose her to Gale again. He just had that horrible feeling. Because she never did choose between them.

"We just have to get passed this next month. We can do this. You can do this. You're strong. You got this Katniss," he said. She looked up at him.

"I could live a hundred lifetimes and never deserve you," she whispered. Peeta let out a frustrated sigh.

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard you say," Peeta said. Katniss looked down.

"Haymitch told me that the night they announced the Quarter Quell," she said. His mouth dropped open.

"That's the most horrible thing I've ever heard. It explains why it's so stupid then. What is wrong with you two? You have the weirdest relationship," he said. Katniss looked up at him and smiled at that. He smiled back at her and leaned in and kissed her.

"Let's concentrate on one day at a time. It's going to be crazy. We're almost to the Capitol again. We greet the fans, and we'll be with our stylists. They'll get us ready, we'll have lunch, and then it will be the Tribute parade at the City Circle, and then we're back at the Tribute Center. Just get through today Katniss, and we'll worry about tomorrow, tomorrow," he told her. Katniss nodded, and they went to breakfast.

"How are you feeling? I didn't have the heart to wake you up last night dear. You were in such a deep sleep. I had brought you dinner, but only Peeta was awake to eat it," Effie said. Katniss looked at him and he smiled.

"Why didn't you just eat dinner here? You didn't have to stay with me the whole night," she asked. He knew she felt bad for making him stay in her room the whole day. But he shook his head.

"I promised I would be there the whole night. I didn't want you to be alone if you had a nightmare. Haymitch stayed with you when I had to use the bathroom. You needed sleep Katniss," Peeta told her. They were served breakfast, and Haymitch threw the crew out. Talking about strategy, and he couldn't let them overhear. Peeta knew what Haymitch was going to say. They had talked last night while Katniss was asleep.

"How do you think she's going to react when she sees them. Cato and Clove. She's gone hunting and freaked out because she thought she shot Marvel again. How is she going to handle it when she gets off the elevator, and she just sees them all standing around with their escorts and mentors and stylists? They're supposed to be dead," Peeta said. Haymitch scrubbed his face with his hands and let out a long sigh.

"What about when she sees Cinna? And Finnick? Rue?" he said.

"How are you gonna be when you see Portia?" Haymitch asked. Peeta looked down at his hands.

"I'm scared to see her. I have nightmares of her being executed in front of me, and my team. But I'm going to be ok. I'm prepared to see them. Even the other tributes. I'll be ok Haymitch," he said. Haymitch nodded his head and leaned back into the chair.

"Yeah, I know you will. It's just her. She won't handle it. She's just not herself. She hasn't been herself in so long," Haymitch admitted.

"You barely told me what happened when I was in the Capitol." Peeta said. Haymitch scratched his face.

"I had to feed her. She wouldn't do it herself. I used to be able to get her to open her mouth, but even after that she stopped. I couldn't force her to swallow. I got a syringe and just shot water down her throat, so at least she didn't dehydrate. Sae started taking her to the bathroom to take a shower, but she's older. If Sae fell, I would have to go in there and do it. Katniss would never forgive me if I saw her naked. She would never forgive me if I was the one bathing her. She was dying in front of me. That's why I called you every day. And I called Aurelius every day. I urged him to bring you home. I thought if I could just keep her alive till you got home..." Haymitch trailed off. It broke his heart to know she had given up like that.

"How are we going to stop her? From freaking out, from screaming, fainting, having panic attacks? How are we going to stop it?" Peeta asked. Haymitch looked at him for a while.

"I have a few ideas," Haymitch said, taking a sip of his drink.

"I don't know if Cinna or Portia remember anything. It isn't till now that I meet either of them. It's their first time in the Games. But you can't run and jump into their arms when you see them," Haymitch told them. He looked at the both of them.

"I know both of you watched them die. And it was horrific. But if they don't remember, then you don't want to scare them off. They're both apart of the Rebellion, but that doesn't mean we want to scare them into it. And if they do remember, we don't want the Capitol to be suspicious. The Capitol listens to everything that goes on. They can be listening at any time. Like I said, if they're suspicious or just bored. So, act natural, the both of you," he warned them.

Peeta knew that he was including Peeta in that, because he didn't want Katniss to feel like this was all riding on her. It was, but they didn't want her to feel any more pressure than she needed. It was impossible to avoid, but they could at least spare her something. Or try to!

"Then the Tribute parade. Hold hands. Catch flowers and blow kisses. Wave to the audience. These are your sponsors remember. And I can't send you any medicine without them. Or food, or the sleeping syrup," Haymitch said. Katniss shook her head.

"Please don't make me give that to him again. He won't come after me," Katniss protested. But Haymitch held his hand up.

"You'll be gone too long. He was fine sleeping. Next time he wakes up, he'll be good as new. No need to keep him awake to have him worry and be sick. It's better that he sleeps it off," Haymitch said. Peeta grabbed Katniss' hand and she looked at him.

"Haymitch is right. It's better this way," Peeta said.

"Act normal. Do everything the same. That's a terrible idea. That's not even a plan," Katniss said and leaned her elbows on the table, her head in her hands. She just couldn't get over that. He wished he could do something to make this better for her. Easier for her. But he knew there was absolutely nothing he could do.

"We'll talk about all that later. Gain the Capitol's love just like you did last time. You were perfect, the both of you. Do it again. Then let's just get upstairs. Don't stare at the other tributes, it will only freak you out. I'll have a better idea of who remembers what by tonight. I'll be able to start formulating a plan," Haymitch said. They both nodded, and he stared at Katniss.

"You need to pull yourself together sweetheart," he said gently. Katniss looked up, and she had tears in her eyes.

"I don't know what's wrong with me. I've never felt like this before. I can't stop crying...I've never been this weak. What if I can't pull this off?" she cried. Effie started tearing up and gave Katniss her napkin. Peeta wrapped his arm around her.

Peeta knew what was wrong with her. Haymitch told him the night before.

"Katniss…you were just staring at the wall yesterday," Peeta said gently. "You've been doing that for months. You're depressed and…" he trailed off, not baring to think about Katniss killing herself, let alone speak about it.

"I need you to think of something. Something in the future, after this is all over. I don't care what it is. Prim getting married," Haymitch said, offering her a suggestion. "Finnick seeing his son being born," Haymitch said again. These things were important to Katniss.

"Mags watching Finnick and Annie get married. Rue reuniting with her family," Peeta told her. He saw hope in Katniss' eyes.

"This boy right here with a clear mind," Haymitch said. Katniss locked eyes with Peeta. "You hold onto those things sweetheart. You close your eyes, wherever you are, and you think of these things. Anything you want in the future, and you hold onto them. When you think your weak, you remember what you're fighting for. This will get done. You can do this, and we'll all be there every step of the way," Haymitch told her. Katniss nodded. Peeta watched as she closed her eyes and took deep breaths. She opened her eyes again, and she nodded.

"I can do this," she said. Peeta and Haymitch smiled, and Effie clapped her hands. But there was something in her voice that sadly, made him doubt that. He knew Haymitch was convinced or anyone at the table…and he knew even Katniss wasn't convincesd herself. But they would not even for a second hesite in letting her know that they belived her. They had to encourage her. Because if they let on that they doubted her…they would fail.

"I have no doubt about it sweetheart. Just get through today. I will come up with a plan. I promise you!" Haymitch promised her.

After breakfast, Katniss and Peeta sat in his room. They were waiting for their fate. To wind up in the Capitol again. A place she swore she'd never see again. "He took you from me here," Katniss whispered. Peeta leaned forward to look at her. She was staring straight ahead.

"He finally figured out how to hurt me. He finally figured out how I felt about you. He took one of the most precious things to me…and he broke it," she whispered. Peeta was devastated. She was heartbroken. He never knew how heartbroken she was…about him. Her words surprised him. He was precious to her.

He had a feeling on the beach when she said she needed him, and then the way she kissed him. It was the first time she had ever kissed him like that before. They finally shared a real kiss, and he wanted nothing more than to take her out of the arena, and finally be together. To make love to her…

But then he opened his eyes. He was in the arena. And they weren't getting out together. He finally felt like she chose him…and it was too late. It was right there for them. Their moment.

But it wasn't in the moment anymore. They were getting this second chance.

He felt like she chose him, but then he got to District 13, and realized he was wrong. That maybe she lied. He thought in that moment that she loved him. But did she really? He had no idea. He doubted it the second he came back to 13. Even with the hijacking. Once he started separating his real memories from his fake ones, he doubted it the moment on the beach.

He pushed off the bed and got on his knees and in between Katniss' legs. He held her face in his hands.

"I know Katniss. I know what he did to you. I know what he did to me…but when your father gave us this second chance…" he trailed off, trying to find his voice again. "He gave me a second chance to be normal again," he whispered. He felt a tear roll down his cheek.

"It just isn't right that we had no time to process this. Or anything. We've never had a moment to just catch our breath. But we have to go back there. We have to go back into the arena. But Katniss I'm right here. My mind is clear. I'm me. It's me Katniss. It's really me," he whispered. She started crying and hugged him tightly.

"I never thought you'd be ok again. I thought I'd never see the real you again. I lost you that day in the jungle. I finally had you, and I lost you," she cried. He kissed her neck. It was short and soft, but it was something he never had done before. He saw the goosebumps that appeared.

"I know how you feel," he told her and pulled back. "When we get home Katniss. We'll talk about everything," he said and held her hands between his.

"Katniss I'm right here. Lean on me. I can get you through this," he told her, pushing some of her hair back.

They arrived at The Capitol, and Katniss' body started shaking. Peeta hugged her tightly.

"This is where we'll separate. But Haymitch will take you to your prep team. Trust him. While you're getting plucked and burned and whatever the heck they do, he'll be working on what to do. Just close your eyes and do like Haymitch said. Think of things that will happen once we keep everyone alive," he encouraged her. He just wanted her to distract himself.

"You'll be with Cinna, and I have no doubt that he'll remember. He'll protect you until your back with me again. I'll hold your hand the whole time on the chariot. You got this Katniss. Just make it through the next few hours," he told her.

Katniss pulled away and nodded. He smiled and kissed her. Really kissed her. It felt so good to be able to kiss her like this, with no one watching. Kissing her, for them.

It would be a few hours before he saw her again. They stepped off the train, and Haymitch held her hand. Peeta knew that he couldn't. Not now. They were whisked away to the Training Center, and he watched Haymitch take her away with him. He gulped.

"It's fine dear. Everyone separates at this point. You're going to get beautiful for the camera and meet your stylist. She's absolutely a doll. You're so lucky to have Portia," Effie said, pulling him along. He was grateful for Effie Trinkett!

They had made the decision the night before, that one of them would always be with Katniss, so she didn't do anything alone. As much as she could be. They had hoped Cinna would remember, because if he did, it was another person to help Katniss. To stand with her and remind her of what she was fighting for. And to be honest, to be with her to stop her from having an episode, fainting…or worse.

They headed to the elevators, when he realized someone was standing next to the door, leaning against the wall. Finnick Odair. Peeta's breath caught in his mouth. He gulped. Finnick saved him so many times in the arena, and in the Capitol. He never had the chance to thank him.

"Finnick darling. How are you?" Effie asked loudly, hugging Finnick. He smiled and hugged her back. He watched as they hugged each other tightly. He even head the small crack in her voice. She was emotional by seeing Finnick again!

Finnick got very close to Peeta, as they waited for the elevator. "It's good to see you Peeta," he whispered. He clasped him on the shoulder. He smiled.

"Thank you for saving me. And taking care of me. Of her," he whispered back, choking a little. Finnick smiled and pulled back. Peeta looked up at the top of the elevator, watching for when it would arrive down to their floor.

"You're too good for any of this Mr. Mellark. And I am so glad that you're ok. It's good to see the real Peeta again. I didn't get too much time with him. Any honest time with him," Finnick told him. Peeta smiled. Peeta was himself in the arena, but they couldn't be real friends then.

"I can't wait to dance at your wedding one day," Finnick said. They looked at each other and smiled. Peeta did nothing but hope for that with Katniss. "And the cake at my wedding was amazing. When we do it again, I hope for something even better," he joked. The elevator buzzed and the doors opened.

"I'll see you both later then," Finnick said, and walked away. Effie ushered Peeta onto the elevator. He was bombarded by his prep team. He liked them, but they were nowhere near as entertaining as Katniss' prep team. They weren't as happy as her team was.

He was plucked and waxed for a few hours, until the moment came when he waited for Portia. He felt annoyed last time he had to lay here, naked, waiting for her. Who honestly needed to meet a 16-year-old boy for the first time, naked? He put his robe on and waited for her. Portia had seen enough of his body. Katniss hadn't even seen him completely naked before. He shook his head. None of those thoughts. He waited impatiently for Portia.

When the door opened, his breath caught in his mouth. He willed himself not to think of her being executed in front of him. It haunted his nightmares. Portia came in and looked at him. She eyed his robe, and then smiled.

"I guess you wearing a robe doesn't surprise me. I've seen it all already," she said with a wink. He smiled. Portia! She leaned in and gave him a hug. "I've missed you my baker boy," she whispered. He nodded his head. He was at a loss for words. He held onto her tightly.

"Don't worry about me. Keep it together for that crazy girl you love so much," she said. He laughed and pulled away. Wiping a few tears away from him. If Portia remembered, then that meant Cinna did.

Peeta covered his face with his hand while she rubbed his shoulder. He loved Portia so much. And she was murdered right in front of him. All because, she cared about him! He finally understood why Katniss felt so guilty. Why she saw their friends and family dying was her fault. Because Portia's death was his fault.

"I know Peeta. It's ok. I'm ok now," she whispered. He hugged her tightly again. If he was getting this emotional, what was Katniss going to do?

Katniss was a wreck. Haymitch had to leave her. She knew he had to. He had to start formulating a plan. And it was the first time she was alone. He told her to keep breathing. To think of all the good things the future held for them.

She tried to listen to him. She tried to keep breathing, but having hair ripped from your whole body kinda distracted her from the breathing part. She couldn't believe how fast time had gone, until she was by herself in a room waiting for Cinna. She put her robe on. He had seen her already. Or had he? She just had to hold onto hope.

She heard the door open, but squeezed her eyes shut. She didn't want to be here. She didn't want to be sitting on this table, waiting for him. They could kill her at any moment. If Snow remembered, he would easily murder her. No one knew her yet; it would be easy. She stopped as she felt warm hands on her shoulders. She opened her eyes and was face to face with Cinna. She felt the sob forming in her throat.

"Don't cry, Girl on Fire. I'm right here. And you need to be strong," Cinna told her. She felt her body shaking, and he hugged her. She held on so tight. "Just don't cry. Keep it together Katniss," he whispered. But she couldn't. She couldn't keep it together.

He was real. And he was here. He was alive. Her beautiful Cinna. "I know what you saw when they beat me. I know it was horrible, and you were sent right into the Games, and they did that to scare you. But you can do this. I'll be behind you the whole time. And don't feel guilty. It was never your fault. I chose the rebellion, and I knew the price. I'm just sorry I had to pay it in front of you," Cinna whispered.

She held on tighter, but he started to pull away, and he smiled at her. "Let's eat some lunch. We'll sit together, and you can hold my hand. But don't keep crying. Wait till tonight and you're in your room to let it all out. Be strong right now. Because were both alive. And we get a second chance," he told her.

He knew. He knew she killed herself. Haymitch told him. Cinna knew what she was thinking and nodded his head. She hadn't spoken yet. She was at such a loss for words. Where would she even find the words?