Second Chances

by Peetabreaddd

FULLY UPDATED! What happens when Katniss can't live without Peeta anymore after they won the war? Feeling lonely, Katniss does something tragic to make it all stop, but is given a second chance to make everything right. STORY HAS BEEN COMPLETELY REDONE

16. Chapter 16

"So, she doesn't remember seeing Seneca Crane?" Haymitch asked. Peeta shook his head.

"She totally just blanked out. And when he walked away, she kinda did what Librae does when he thinks he's in his Games. She said a couple of things that she said back then," Peeta said, rubbing his forehead.

"Like what?" Cinna asked.

"When she was in her assessment and said thanks for your consideration…when she was telling me that she needed to get me that medicine because I couldn't walk. And something from the interview before we went home," Peeta scrubbed his face. He was so worried about her. Even more now.

"Peeta, Librae isn't that bad. Snow made it sound like he was. Something just triggers him really quick, and he thinks he's in the Games for a minute but comes right out of it. He has nightmares just like the rest of us do. But if she does that, then we should get down on our knees and thank God that that's all that happens to her," Finnick said.

"But what if that's not all that happens to her. What if she goes long periods of times thinking she's back in her Games. When she wakes up from her nightmares it's getting harder to make her realize that it's not like last time. That I'm here in 13. She said she feels like she goes back and forth. This isn't ok. She's getting worse," Peeta said, starting to raise his voice. Haymitch put his hand on his shoulder.

"Peeta calm down. She's gonna be ok. We'll get her through this," Haymitch told him.

Peeta was totally distracted that day. He kept worrying about Katniss. He was happy she at least agreed to talk with Cenia again that day. He wished she would talk to her more often. But he'd take advantage of the opportunity whenever he could. He ended up sitting down at lunch, and his brothers and dad sat with him.

"Hey. The bread's good today," Peeta told his dad.

"Well thank you. How are doing?" his dad asked him. But before he could say anything, Ryee butted in.

"Have you seen the Goddess today? She's perfection," Ryee said all dreamily. The three of them laughed at him.

"Why don't you just go and talk to her, instead of coming into my compartment every day?" Peeta asked.

"You can't just speak to a Goddess," Ryee told him, like Peeta was completely insane.

"Her name's Johanna," Katniss said dryly as she sat down next to Peeta.

"Hey," he said and leaned in and kissed her. She looked a little better. He was dying to know how her talk with Cenia went.

"A Goddess named Johanna," Ryee told them, holding his heart. Wheet just laughed at him, and Ryee whipped his head over to him.

"Why are you laughing?" Ryee asked, and then looked over at Peeta. "You know he has the hots for Thresh's sister, right?" Ryee asked. Wheet's face turned bright red and smacked Ryee.

"Mind your own damn business," Wheet snapped at him. Peeta softly chuckled and shook his head as they started bickering back and forth, with their dad trying to wrangle them up.

"So pretty much every Mellark boy falls head over heels in love with a girl, and is too afraid to talk to them?" Katniss whispered. Peeta looked at with wide eyes and a huge smile. She made a joke. He leaned forward and kissed her.

"You have the most beautiful smile. I wish I could see it more often," he told her, making her blush. "But to answer your question. Yes. We all are," Peeta joked.

When they were dumping their trays, Gale and Madge came into the cafeteria and walked over to them. "Hey. We have to talk to you about something," Gale said, looking at Katniss.

"What is it?" she asked. Gale waved at them to follow him. They followed him out into the hallway. "Coin wants us to deal with Thread and the rest of the Peacekeepers," Gale told them. Peeta had completely forgot about them. And by the look on Katniss' face, she did to.

"What does she want us to do?" Katniss asked.

"Execute the ones that need to be executed. Keep the one's locked up who need to be locked up. And then track the others with less crimes. Basically, become slaves to District 13. Working every day until we're out of here and then finally letting District 12 deal with their punishments," Gale said. Peeta put his hand on her back.

"Are you gonna be ok?" Peeta asked. Katniss had this icy look about her. That worried him.

"I'll talk to Thread. Make sure he watches all his friends get executed. Then come get me. And we know how to take care of him," Katniss told Gale, who just nodded.

"What does that mean?" Madge asked. They all looked over at her. This really wasn't her world. Why was she here? It finally dawned on him. They liked each other. Madge had a crush on Gale, and he had been so caught up in his own life, that he didn't see it. Gale must have some feelings towards her. Because he had seen them together so many times since they got to District 13. Was he finally healing from Katniss? He knew that the past year couldn't have been easy. Pretending him and Katniss were together. If he were in Gale's shoes, he would be miserable. Not fully being able to start mending his broken heart until they were in 13.

But then he remembered something that Katniss' father said to him…

"Gale is meant to marry a lovely blonde girl. And the funny thing is, Katniss was always meant to marry a blonde herself,"

Madge! It was Madge all along. He was certain of it. He felt it his bones.

"It means Katniss is gonna say her peace to him. Thread will watch all his goons be executed. We'll all come back…and I'm going to execute him," Gale told her gravely.

"Are you sure you're ok with this?" Peeta asked. Katniss nodded her head.

"I'll be fine," Katniss said. They went downstairs to where Thread was being held. All the Peacekeepers had already been sentenced. 37 Peacekeepers were being executed. It made Peeta's stomach turn. But they were torturing people in District 12. They had to be executed. Thread was sitting in a chair, chained up and he had some contraption over his mouth.

"He can't spit on her," Gale said. Boggs brought him, Katniss, Gale and Haymitch down. No one else. They were the ones that had been affected by Thread. Sure, all of 12 had been…but this meant something different to the four of them. This man came into their territory. He tortured their people.

They entered the room, and Thread just glared at them. Katniss stepped forward and leaned down into his face.

This man. This man caused so much fear inside of her. She watched as he hurt her District. It didn't matter if she knew them or not. Had never seen them. They were her people. And of course, he whipped Gale.

"I bet you really wanna spit at me right now, don't you?" she asked. She knew that if Thread could, he would kill her right now. She stood in front of him. Her arms crossed.

"I told you. I told you right as I got onto the train…You think you've won. You think you get the last laugh because I'm going into the arena, and Snow's gonna kill me. Well think again. When you and I see each other again, it will be when you're on your knees, begging me to spare your life. I'll make you watch as each of your little minions here dies, with you knowing that you're going to be executed when they're all dead. Only, I'm not going to be the one to kill you. Gale is…Why didn't you believe me?" she asked, tilting her head.

The guys just all looked at each other.

"I told you Snow wasn't going to kill me. I practically told you that I was getting out…but you didn't believe me, did you?" she asked. She stared at him smugly. Peeta wondered what was going on her head. Katniss suddenly punched Thread in the face and his chair fell over. She just stood there, staring at him as he screamed through the thing over his mouth. Haymitch burst out laughing.

"Serves that fucker right. He beat up Ripper and put her in the stockade just for selling white liquor," Haymitch said. Peeta just looked at him.

"Really Haymitch?" Peeta said, shaking his head. Haymitch laughed as he and Gale righted his chair.

"You're going to sit there and watch all those Peacekeepers die. And then, Gale's gonna kill you. For whipping him. For whipping so many of us. For beating us. For imprisoning us. AND FOR BOMBING US!" Katniss screamed, making all four of them jump.

"Do you remember last time?" Katniss asked. He nodded his head. Trying to look smug. "Well, you can wipe that look off your face. You ended up losing after all. I won. This time District 12, won! Every, single, one of us! We all made it out," Katniss said. She bent down and got in his face again and stared at him for a moment.

"Untie him," Katniss said. Then she stood up and stepped back.

"Excuse me?" Haymitch asked.

"Untie him. Put him on his knees," Katniss said. Boggs and Gale went over to him. They untied him and forced him onto his knees, still holding him from moving. Peeta didn't like where this was going. "Take that thing off his mouth," Katniss said as she stepped further back so he couldn't spit on her. Boggs did as she asked.

"Beg me to spare your life. And I just might," Katniss said. Peeta gulped. The two of them had a standoff. Neither one wanting to be the first one to look away.

"Why should I? We both know you're going to kill me?" Thread said.

"I was supposed to kill Snow to. But instead, I killed Coin. And I'm mentally unstable. I never know what I'm going to do most of the time. So, beg for your life, and I may show you mercy," Katniss said and leaned over. "Convince me," she said, deadly. Peeta's eyes widened, and his body turned to ice. That's what Snow said to her. He was done listening to her. He stepped forward and grabbed her.

"Alright that's enough," Peeta said, making her look at him. "Stop it. Just get on with the executions and let's be done with it. Stop doing this to yourself," Peeta told her. Katniss stared at him for a moment, and then stormed out of the room. Peeta looked back at Thread.

"We all knew she wouldn't spare your life," Peeta said. Peeta walked out of the room as well, not bothering to catch up to Katniss. She didn't want him to. She was angry with him now. But she was channeling something inside of her. Some type of vengeance that he knew just wasn't good for her.

The executions started an hour later, and it didn't take long before Thread was up, and Peeta walked outside. It smelled like death. He could see the blood that was on the ground. Katniss came out a moment later. She wouldn't look at him. She just stared at Thread. He needed to know what was going on inside of her head. He wish he knew. But something was… and he was afraid for her. She was only getting more mentally unstable as time went on.

Thread was just standing there. Hand in cuffs and chained, that was hooked to the ground. He couldn't run. All he could do was stand there.

"You don't get to torture District 12 anymore. You don't get to torture anyone anymore," Katniss said and turned around and went back inside. Peeta followed her, and right as the door closed, Peeta heard the gunshot. Gale killed him.

He hadn't seen Katniss the rest of the night. He had tried looking for her, but he couldn't find her. She didn't want to be found. He had a miserable time trying to sleep. Around 3:30 in the morning is when he heard the door open. He bolted up to sit on the bed to see her as she walked in.

"You're back," he said. She nodded her head and looked over at Johanna's bed. "She's out with a guy again. Where have you been? I've been looking everywhere for you?" he asked her.

She reached into her drawers and grabbed a t-shirt and walked into the bathroom without shutting the door. She came back out a moment later with the shirt on. She pulled her socks and pants off, so she was just wearing her shirt and panties, and then crawled into bed to curl up against Peeta. He hugged her tightly to him.

"Katniss talk to me, please. I need to know that you're ok," Peeta said. Katniss leaned up a little to look at him, confusion written all over her face. Oh no.

"Why wouldn't I be ok?" she asked him. Peeta gulped. She didn't remember. He knew she didn't remember what had happened today. His heart sped up again from fear. "What's wrong?" she asked. He could feel himself sweating.

"I just…you were quiet today. I thought something was wrong," he lied. She smiled softly at him.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Thank you for checking up on me," she whispered and kissed him softly on the lips.

"Why is he bringing Johanna into the videos now? Snow didn't do that last time. He only used Peeta," Cinna said. Another day of Peeta having to sit through a pointless Command meeting that got them absolutely nowhere. Peeta just scrubbed his face.

"He has different Advisors around him. All the ones that were killed las time, they fled here first. He's making some different decisions. We only have a few Advisors on our side left that he doesn't know are on our side," Plutarch told them. Thresh leaned sideways.

"Are these meetings always this dumb?" he asked. Peeta nodded his head and took his hands away from his face. It was odd seeing Thresh here. But he had just found out that morning that Thresh planned on going to the Capitol with them.

It was Plutarch's idea of course. Everyone remembered Thresh from their Games. He would always play a role in the history of the war. He let Katniss go, when he should have killed her. Killing Katniss would have resulted in Peeta dying but Thresh wouldn't have won the Games. Cato would have.

Peeta shook his head. Why think of that now? It was stupid.

"It's complete waste of time. I usually just sit here and zone out," Peeta admitted, making Thresh smile. "How's your family?"

"They're good. My grandmother feels at peace here. She's finally able to rest. She doesn't have to work. She's enjoying every minute of her newfound retirement," Thresh said. That was something good to hear. This is what Peeta had been fighting for. All the little things, like his grandmother not having to work again.

"That's awesome. I'm happy to hear that. Your grandmother and sister are so kind. I'm happy for them that they have you back," Peeta said. Thresh nodded his head. "It's nice to hear something good like that," Peeta told him. Thresh nodded in agreement

"Now me and my sister get to take care of my grandmother the way she deserves. And I have you guys to thank, for whatever brought on this miracle,"

"Don't thank me. It wasn't me. It was Katniss," Peeta told him.

"Are you two even listening?" Plutarch asked.

"No, not at all," Thresh said. Haymitch and Finnick laughed.

"Peeta, do you think Katniss would let me film her outside. Nothing crazy. Just some hunting. Sitting by the river. Walking around. We just wanna show everyone that she's alive, and she's ok," Cressida asked him.

"Of course, she'll do it. She won't have to act. She'll love it," Plutarch said. Johanna groaned.

"I swear to God, are you high on Morphling?" Johanna demanded. Peeta smiled. He already knew what was coming. He was just gonna sit back and watch the show. He heard Haymitch mumble.

"If he is, I want some," making Peeta smile again.

"She doesn't want to be on camera at all. She won't love anything that has to do with a camera. You've seen what she's like. Why are you forcing her to still be on camera?" Johanna asked Plutarch.

"Because she, is the face of the Rebellion," Coin said.

"She's having a fucking mental breakdown. What more do you want from her? She's trying to just make it through the God damned day," Johanna yelled and took her hand and swiped everything that was in reach of her arm. Sending papers, a couple of drinks, a tray of food, and whatever else had been in the line of fire, and then she stormed out. Peeta smiled.

"That was completely unnecessary," Coin said.

"Can you blame her?" Finnick asked Coin. "We're all just trying to get her through the day. She is the face of the Rebellion, but you have to give her some breathing room. You can't just put her on camera, just to show her off without a reason," Finnick said.

"She'll do what she needs to, when she needs to. Otherwise, just let her be," Haymitch said. Peeta got up and stormed out. He was tired of hearing Plutarch and Coin go after her. It wasn't what she needed.

The week had gone by with no real issues. Peeta asked Katniss if she wanted to let Cressida record her. Katniss said it was fine.

"You're not asking me to do anything. You can follow me, that's it," Katniss said. Cressida agreed, and actually just let Castor follow her.

Her and Gale went hunting. Katniss did scowl a lot at Castor, which just made Gale chuckle. Castor was just like Peeta. Very loud!

"You're not gonna make me take off my boots and walk around the woods in bare feet to? Are you?" Castor asked. She had made Peeta do that in their first Games.

Gale burst out laughing, and Katniss rolled her eyes.

"I don't understand why you make so much noise. Gale has bigger feet than you, and he doesn't even make a quarter of the noise you do," Katniss snapped, just making Gale and Castor laugh harder.

"He's had years of practice. I've never had a reason to walk softly," Castor said.

"Peeta's actually louder," Gale said. Katniss handed her bow to Gale, and then stomped around, imitating Peeta. It made all three of them laugh.

"I don't really think I'm that loud," Peeta said dryly.

Katniss did whatever she wanted that day. Katniss actually pushed Peeta into the stream, but he grabbed her, and they both fell in. It was easy to forget that Castor was there, following her for about an hour. Even though he was right there the whole time, Katniss would talk to him, and it wasn't a big deal. She forgot why Castor was carrying a camera.

They were friends. That's why it was easy.

They only used footage of Katniss for now.

Peeta and Katniss were also getting to know the Victors, and all the Tributes from their first Games. Clove would just glare at them and stomp away. But for the life of him, he couldn't figure out Cato, Marvel or Glimmer. Whenever they would see Peeta or Katniss, they'd all of sudden become quiet.

But Peeta especially loved the time that Katniss spent time with just the girls. Prim, Rue and Madge had all died. And now, here she was with them again. The four of them spent a lot of time together, but it wasn't just them. Johanna and Annie were right there with them. Marlah from 11 had been with them quite a few times. The week had been nice.

Peeta and Katniss always tried to find small moments that they could be together. Most of the time it didn't get passed more than kissing. Somehow, they couldn't coordinate being in the compartment without Johanna, or without someone else there. Or even if they were there at the same time.

Peeta and Katniss had just woken up and were still in bed, sitting up against the wall. Johanna had woken them up when she opened the door. They were gonna fool around that night. Katniss always slept on the outside of the bed, and Peeta by the wall. But, whenever they wanted to be intimate, Katniss laid by the wall, so Peeta could hide her if she was in a compromising position.

But Peeta got out of the shower, and she had already fallen asleep.

Johanna was changing so she could go to breakfast. "So, what's your schedule today?" Peeta asked. Johanna scanned her arm and then rolled her eyes.

"Meeting in Command. Weapons training. HA. What a joke. And then lunch, and then laundry duty for a few hours. So, I'm gonna skip the meeting and hang out with a guy, go play around with my ax and screw the other weapons. Eat my lunch and then go help with the laundry," Johanna said.

"That sounds like a good plan," Peeta said. Johanna looked at them and then rolled her eyes. She tied up her shoes and stood up.

"Have fun you two," Johanna called out as she shut the door. Peeta laughed as he threw himself on top of Katniss and pulled her down to lay on her back. Katniss burst out laughing.

"What are you doing?" she laughed. He straddled her and leaned down to kiss her, pushing his tongue in for a moment before he sat back up.

"Oh, I'm having fun!" Peeta said as he yanked off his shirt and threw it over his head, making Katniss laugh again and cover her mouth. He yanked off his pants and threw them, and then got down and raised her shirt a bit, not breaking eye contact with her as he kissed her stomach and then pulled her pants down and threw the pants as well.

And then he did something a little different. Peeta crawled back up to her and put his hands under her back and moved them up, causing her shirt to raise slightly. His hands were on her bra, and he unsnapped them. He sat back up and straddled her and wiggled his eyebrows.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"Taking your bra off without taking your shirt off," he informed her, and helped pull the straps out of her sleeves. Then he reached under her shirt and yanked the bra out and threw her bra over his head. They stared at each other then. This was a different position to be in. Peeta had never straddled her before. She didn't know what to do with her hands, and she ended up resting them on his thighs.

"Remember before we left 12, I said I couldn't wait to get here, because then we'd be exploring all the things about our relationship, especially this part?" he whispered. She nodded her head, and then smiled. He leaned down and kissed her again. He kissed his way to her ear. "I love exploring with you," he lightly bit her ear, causing her to shiver.

"Why…why did you…want my bra off?" she stuttered through him biting at her neck. He sat up and smiled down at her.

"I'm glad you asked," he said, and got off of her and moved them so they were on their sides, and he pulled her to him and laid back a little. "You really wanna know?" he asked. She nodded her head. He hugged her tighter.

"Most of the time you wear a bra. Only once or twice you haven't…I love to feel your breasts against my chest," he said huskily. She felt a throbbing between her legs suddenly. Her breathing became heavy. But she gulped though.

He smiled and cradled the side of her head. "Don't worry Katniss. I know you're not quite ready for me to touch your breasts. I'm not gonna rush you. I just want to feel them like this," he told her.

"How do you do that? How do you always know when I'm ready for more?" she asked, astonished that he was always right. He chuckled.

"I know you very well now. It's a feeling I get. I can just tell. And I can't explain it," Peeta told her. Which was true. But her body most of the time told him. Speeding up her actions, making a desperate attempt for something more. The noises she made. And the biggest tell of all…biting her lip. It's one of the biggest signs for him. And he'd never tell her about it because she'd stop doing it. She'll overthink it, and purposely stop herself from doing it. He'd lose that advantage!

"Thank you," she whispered to him. "Thank you for always knowing, even when I don't know myself," she whispered, and he kissed her.

They spent their days being with their friends and family. It was this nice lull until the Capitol would sadly bomb District 13.

He started noticing more and more things about their little, but noticeably big group. Like his father looked happy.

It was sad to say, but his dad did look at peace without his mother. They had separated the night that they got to District 13. His father let his mother know that he didn't want to be married to her anymore. She was stunned, but then just turned on her heel and walked away from him. Wheet said that she hadn't even hesitated. She didn't even look at the boys. Just walked away.

Peeta felt sad for his father, having to be with someone that you didn't love, just because you loved your children.

He and his brothers had never been closer, and they, meaning Ryee mostly, had wound themselves around the people he also called family. Wheet was quieter and found himself with Beetee most of the time. Or any of the quiet Victors really. Annie or Mags. He and Gale seemed to get along.

Ryee of course was more outgoing, so whereas he did get along with Gale a lot, he found Ryee with Finnick and Haymitch a lot.

Peeta liked that he and Katniss really got to know Thresh and Rue's families. And he and Katniss both considered Thresh officially their friend. And he had grown closer to the other Tributes. Of course, a couple of them making a surprise appearance.

"I'm sorry," someone said as they bumped right into Katniss. It was Glimmer. He watched Glimmer as she gulped. The three of them stared at each other for a moment. "My parents…my mother really feels awful…for the way she treated you when you stayed at our house," Glimmer rushed out. Well, Peeta hadn't expected that. Cato and Marvel came up short when they realized who Glimmer was talking to.

"Your parents had every right to be upset. They thought their daughter had been murdered. And that we had done it. So, they don't need to feel bad," Peeta told her.

"Yeah, I don't think any of our parents were nice to you guys though," Marvel said. He felt Katniss tense slightly just from hearing his voice.

"Not particularly," Katniss said dryly.

"District 2 trains us for the Hunger Games our whole life," Cato said. He felt a small tremor run through Katniss, and he subtly put his hand on her back. "It's all any of us know. It's an honor to be in the Games…and it's an honor if you win, or lose," Cato said cryptically and walked away.

Peeta never did manage to figure out what Cato meant. But he always made sure to give the Careers a wide birth. He never knew what was going on in their heads.

Peeta enjoyed watching the friendships that were emerging from their group, but he was starting to notice a few friendships, that may start being more than just friends.

He had been watching Gale and Madge get closer. He could see that Madge would look at him when she thought no one was looking. And if he wasn't mistaken, Gale was looking at her as well.

He finally saw what Ryee was talking about. Wheet did have a crush on Thresh's sister, Theresa. And he thought Theresa might have a crush on him as well. But Wheet was shy. He wouldn't be the one to talk to her first.

And then he noticed Prim and Rory. That was something that Katniss had pointed out to Peeta one day at lunch.

"It think it's sweet…Well, I guess it was meant to be that a Hawthorne would marry and Everdeen," Peeta said. Katniss snapped her head to look at him.

"Don't say that!" she snapped quietly at him. He was stunned by that. She rarely snapped at him. "Don't talk about her future," she hissed. She put her face in her hands. He understood. She was too afraid to think of Prim's future. She couldn't until the war was over, and he knew she wouldn't be able to think about her future for a long time. He pulled her to his chest and wrapped his arms around her shoulders, with her still covering her face.

"Baby it's ok. I get it," he told her.

"I can't do it. I can't think that far ahead," she whispered.

"I know…we just gotta get through this war. And then I promise you Katniss, I'm gonna make sure that you start to dream about a future," he told her.

He was careful after that before he mentioned things to Katniss. But he still noticed Rue and Justin. Justin was the Tribute from District 4 from their Games. He was a little kid, just like Rue, that had curly hair. They would both blush anytime they saw each other.

He also noticed how close Portia and Cinna had become. He wondered if there was something going on there.

Peeta was laying in his bed waiting for Katniss, while Johanna was putting on her makeup. "A different guy tonight?" Peeta asked. Johanna laughed.

"Not a different guy," Johanna said. Peeta leaned up on his elbows, and Katniss poked her head out of the bathroom. Not a different one? Johanna had been talking nonstop about going out with a different guy each night. She never went out with the same guy.

"I thought you didn't do repeats?" Peeta joked, making her laugh. Katniss shut off the bathroom light and leaned her shoulder into the doorway.

"Are you smiling?" Katniss asked. Johanna rolled her eyes. Peeta and Katniss looked at each other, and Peeta sat up.

"You like him," Peeta said. Johanna glared at him, and Peeta and Katniss laughed. Peeta suddenly felt bad for his brother. But then he remembered a short conversation with Ryee just the other day.

"Wow. Johanna just walked by you, and you didn't stand there and drool," Peeta joked. Ryee shrugged.

"The Goddess just doesn't give me the time of day. I'm not willing to wait 11 years before I talk to her," Ryee said.

Maybe Ryee knew she was seeing somebody. Maybe that's why he was so bummed out. It explained why he stopped talking about Johanna every time he saw Peeta.

"So, you have a boyfriend now?" Katniss asked as she went over and sat on the bed next to Peeta, who was still just leaning on his elbows. "What's he like?" Katniss asked in a girly voice. Peeta laughed and sat up. It did something to his hurt to hear Katniss making a joke. To he hear her laugh. To see her smile.

"Is he just the dreamiest?" Peeta asked.

"Oh, does he open doors for you, and pull out your chair?" she asked.

"And is he respectable?" Peeta asked. She stood up and glared at them.

"Are you two done yet?" she asked. They both sat there laughing. Johanna grabbed her shoes.

"You make sure he brings you back here by midnight. Or I'm taking my shotgun out and I'll go roaming every hall screaming your name until I find you and that boy," Peeta said. She grabbed her pillow and smacked Peeta hard in the face. He was sure that Johanna could still hear them laughing from down the hall even after she slammed the door.

Peeta fell back against the bed, and Katniss doubled over laughing, onto his stomach. It took a few minutes for their laughter to die down, but eventually they were able to catch their breath. Katniss chuckled and wiped at her eyes.

"God her face was so funny," Katniss chuckled. Peeta leaned up on his elbows again.

"You know what this means don't you?" he asked. She smiled at him and stood up, pulling her pants down. He laughed and started yanking off his shirt along with his pants. When he was done, he looked up to see Katniss with her hands up the front of her shirt and started pulling down her bra to toss it on the floor as well. He smiled up at her.

He took her hands and pulled her down so she could lay on the bed closest to the wall. He looked down at her and smiled, and put his hand on her stomach, moving his hand underneath her shirt. He moved down and then around to her back. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pushed herself against him. She had been doing that every time they were in bed together, ever since he told her that he liked feeling her breasts. She even stopped wearing a bra to bed.

Things started heating up as they usually do…but it was different. Peeta always knew when something was different, and Katniss wanted more. Sometimes she knew what she wanted, and sometimes she didn't know. He knew what it was. She kept pressing her chest against him. He pulled back and looked down at her. She was biting her lip. So that meant she was afraid to say it.

"Katniss…" he whispered. He leaned down and started kissed her jaw up to her ear. "Can I take off your shirt and touch your breasts?" he whispered in her ear and kissed it, blowing on it and sending shivers through her whole body. She moaned and nodded. He moaned himself and sat up. He pulled her to sit up as well and put his hand on the hem of her shirt and looked up at her.

"Are you sure. You can say no. We don't have to go further," Peeta asked her.

"It's ok," she whispered. He nodded his head and he slowly started pulling her shirt up. She raised her arms to let him pull it off all the way and toss it to the floor. He started down at her.

He forgot how to breathe. No fantasy could ever compare to the real thing. He just stared lustfully at her. He watched as the flush on her face went all the way down to her breasts, and her arms moved to cover herself. He took her wrists to stop her.

"Please don't do that. You're beautiful. I could look at you forever," he told her. She blushed even more. He reached his hand up slowly and softly cupped her breast in his hand, squeezing her softly. She closed her eyes and let out a deep breath. He took his thumb and brushed it across her nipple, watching the little pebble harden, making her gasp.

She threw her eyes opened, and he could see they were clouded over with lust.

Peeta put his hand on her shoulder and softly pushed her back to the bed. He licked his lips as he looked at her. He cupped her again and rubbed her nipples again, causing her to sigh.

"Does that feel good?" he asked her. She nodded her head. The brush of his thumb caused an electrical charge past her stomach to throb down there. He cupped her breast again, weighing it in his hand and felt him pinch her nipple, causing her to whimper and arch her back.

"Oh God Peeta," she moaned. She then felt like she was gonna die. On her other breast she suddenly felt his mouth on her nipple, lightly sucking on it. She picked her head up and looked at him. He was staring up at her as she watched him sucking just a little harder now, his eyes looked dangerous with lust, and she loved it.

She couldn't watch though. The pleasure he was giving her was too much for her to hold her head up. She threw her head back and grabbed his head, holding him there. He started lightly biting her. The throbbing was starting to get more intense. She wanted him to touch her down there, but she didn't want to feel him move. The pleasure she got from her breasts right now was delicious. She just never knew that she could feel this way.

He switched breasts to give the other attention with his mouth, while he put his hand on the other one. Pinching and pulling at her nipples. He kissed all around her breasts. She felt the throbbing intensify, and she pushed herself into Peeta, holding him tightly in place. He was an artist with his hands. They were magical, she was constantly saying it.

Her breasts were on fire. She didn't know how long Peeta was going back and forth, sucking, and biting on her nipples, squeezing and pinching them, but the throbbing was intensifying even more. She was aching. It was building.

"Peeta," she moaned loudly. She felt it getting stronger. "Peeta," she moaned louder. Her voice getting higher, almost sounding panicked.

"Peeta…Peeta…" she was griping the sheets so hard. "PEETA," she practically yelled as her body exploded into the most intense orgasm she ever had. She tried to grind herself against Peeta for relief. He must have caught on because he pushed his hand between her legs and rubbed the bundle of nerves has fast as he could, intensifying her orgasm, and she felt herself burst again into another one even stronger than the one she just had. That first orgasm hadn't even finished before her body exploded again. He kept on sucking hard on her nipples as she moved her hips against his hand. All she could see was stars as her body convulsed due to Peeta's mouth and hands. She couldn't stop her body from rocking roughly into him.

This lasted a minute, before she roughly pushed his hand away from being too sensitive. She panted heavily and Peeta crawled up her body, laying half on her. His hand on her stomach.

"Did you…have an orgasm?" he asked her. She opened her eyes and nodded her head. "Just from me touching your breasts?" he asked her. She blushed and covered her face.

"You had two orgasms?" he asked her. She couldn't even look at him. "That is the hottest thing ever,"

She moved her hand and opened her eyes. "My brothers talked about something like that. That no guy is capable of getting a girl to do that," Peeta said and then smiled proudly.

"Can you not talk about your brothers right now?" she asked. He smiled and leaned back down and kissed her.

A couple of orgasms later, they were sated and laid there on their sides. She pushed herself against him.

"How does this feel now?" she asked him. He pulled her closer to him. Her breasts against his chest. He leaned down and kissed her.

"It feels perfect,"

Peeta loved the new turn that they took that night. It wasn't just because Katniss took off her shirt. It was Katniss baring herself to him. Trusting Peeta enough to look at her undressed. It was a huge step for Katniss. No one, besides Cinna and her Prep team, which didn't count, had ever seen this much of Katniss before. She wasn't just taking her shirt of for pleasure, she was trusting him. Trusting that they loved each other. Letting him in. And he couldn't be happier.

Johanna had gotten up early one morning, and he had his arm wrapped around Katniss, facing Johanna's bed. As soon as she left, he leaned down and started kissing her neck. His arm that was under her body, reached up and softly cupped her breast through her shirt. She had stopped wearing a bra to bed.

His other hand he put on her hip and slowly moved it to the top of her pants, slowly inside her pajama pants, and inside her panties. He lightly started rubbing her clit, and she sighed softly. He did this for a minute before he moved his finger down between her lips. She was already getting wet. He used some of the moisture to rub her clit with, circling it.

He felt her slowly start to stir, and moan softly. "Peeta," she whispered, not awake yet.

He reached down and stuck his hand under her shirt. He used his thumb to graze her nipple, and then started pinching it. She pushed her head back and moaned a little louder. He started kissing and sucking on her neck.

"Good morning love," Peeta whispered into her ear.

"What are you doing?" she whispered, starting to wake up more. He hummed as he licked the spot under her ear and then blew on it, causing shivers down her body.

"I thought I'd wake you up with an orgasm," he put a little more pressure on her clit as he softly bit her ear. "Doesn't that sound nice?" he asked her, making her softly chuckle.

"Very much," she whispered. It was fun being in a new position. Since the moment they came back, he wanted to be with Katniss. He wanted to explore every aspect of their relationship. When it came to being intimate, after the first time, all he could think of sometimes was exploring this part. Taking it a bit further each time. He wanted to know every inch of her body.

He sped up his movements and sucked on the spot below her ear. She put one hand over his that was squeezing her nipple and reached back to grab his leg or hip. He wasn't sure. But she ended up a bit further back and squeezed his butt as she started coming undone in his hands.

"So, what's on your arm today?" Peeta asked nonchalantly. Johanna turned her back and rolled her eyes.

"I have laundry duty for about two hours. I have lunch at 12:00. I have Training at 1:00 to 4:00. I'm coming back around 4:15ish to take a shower, and then I have a meeting which I'm ignoring and going to play with weapons for an hour, before I go see Cenia, and then dinner at 7:00," Johanna said and smiled. "See ya guys later," Johanna.

Later that day, Johanna sat at the lunch table with Finnick, Haymitch, Annie, Blight and Thresh.

"I was gonna see if Katniss wanted to play with weapons again. I think I'm getting better with the bow," Finnick said and pretended to be shooting an arrow.

"Oh, I wouldn't do that right now," Johanna told him. Finnick looked at her and tilted his head.

"Why not?" Finnick asked. Johanna laughed.

"They're fooling around," Johanna informed them. Thresh put his hand over his face and chuckled.

"Damn horndogs," Haymitch grumbled.

"How do you even know that's what they're doing?" Finnick asked her. Johanna snorted.

"They think they're flying under the radar with me. They ask me every single day where I'm gonna be, so they can plan times to fool around," Johanna said. Finnick, Haymitch and Blight looked at each other and burst out laughing. Annie lightly slapped his arm.

"Oh, Finnick don't laugh at them. I think it's sweet," Annie said.

"It's not sweet, it's annoying. I finally just tell them hour by hour where I'm gonna be. I walk in and figure it out. They throw their clothes around the room and think I don't see them on the floor when I come in. Her bra was literally hanging off a picture frame on the wall," Johanna said. All four boys were laughing now.

"So first it was just her pajama pants, and then his pants and shirt. Then I start finding her bra. And now, her shirt," Johanna said, shaking her head. Finnick was laughing so hard he couldn't breathe.

"They're growing up," Finnick laughed.

"Oh, you'll like this. So, even without the clothes, I can tell what's been going on just by the way they're in bed," Johanna said. Blight waved his hand for her to continue.

"Alright. Lay it on me," Blight joked.

"Ok. So, when Katniss is facing me, and Peeta's behind her, wrapped around her. They're just sleeping. Those are the peaceful nights. When she's having a nightmare, he sleeps on his back, and she sleeps on his chest. And vice versa if Peeta has the nightmare,"

"That doesn't sound bad," Thresh said.

"When he sleeps with his back towards me, WITHhis shirt on, they're still sleeping but have their pants off, and they're having some moment. THEN, when he's sleeping with his back towards me and he has his shirt off, that means he's covering her, so I don't see her. But they have their pants off, and now she has her bra and shirt off. They're so fucking obvious, but they have no clue that they're obvious," Johanna said, shaking her head. The others were laughing too hard.

"They're both so…innocent," Finnick said.

"I think it's absolutely sweet. And I'm so happy they're stealing moments to have some peace," Annie said, all dreamy like.

"They're stealing moments to rub one out," Johanna said. Annie laughed and rolled her eyes.

"I can always hear when they go at it, dry humping the hell out of each other. God knows what I'll hear when they finally get it on," Haymitch said, rubbing his forehead. They just kept laughing.

Later that afternoon, Johanna was coming back to her compartment and opened the door.

"Hey Johanna. When do you have dinner?" Madge asked as she was walking by.

"At 7:00," Madge smiled.

"Me to. I'll see you later," Madge said as she walked away. Johanna went into the compartment and heard something strange.

She walked in and saw Peeta and Katniss sitting on their bed under the covers. Their shirts were messed up. Peeta's was inside out and backwards. Katniss' shirt wasn't covering all of her stomach. Their hair was a mess, and their lips were swollen, and they were both flushed.

"Hey. I thought you were coming back around 4:15," Peeta said. God they were so obvious.

"It's 4:17," Johanna said. Katniss and Peeta looked at the clock and then at each other. Peeta scratched the back on his head, chuckling uncomfortably.

"Oh yeah. We just lost track of time. We went back to sleep. We just woke up," Peeta said. Katniss smiled and nodded her head.

Johanna didn't look directly at their pants. She pretended she didn't notice them. They didn't even have enough time to grab their pants. And she already saw Katniss' bra on the couch. She really couldn't stand it anymore. She had to do it. She bent over and picked up both of their pajama pants and held them up. The two of them just sat there wide eyed. Both of their faces turning red.

"We weren't doing anything," Peeta rushed out. He cleared his throat. "We just went back to sleep after you left," Peeta told her. Johanna tried not to laugh.

"So, you took your pants off and slept in your underwear?" Johanna asked. Katniss covered her face.

"Hey did you find Katniss and ask her-"Finnick stopped when he saw Johanna holding pants up. He looked over and saw Peeta and Katniss in bed. Finnick crossed his arms and covered his mouth to keep from laughing. "Hi friends. Whatcha doing?" he asked.

"We were sleeping," Peeta asked. Johanna snorted. Finnick looked at the pants, and then back at them.

"You slept in your underwear?"

"If I have to sit through that fucking meeting with Plutarch, I'm not doing it by myself with no booze," Haymitch said. He also stopped in the room and looked around. Katniss groaned and Peeta scoffed and rolled his eyes.

"What are you doing?" Haymitch asked.

"I found their pajama pants all over the floor," Johanna said.

"We were sleeping," Peeta and Katniss forced out.

"In your underwear?" Haymitch asked. Johanna and Finnick couldn't hold it in and started laughing.

"GET OUT!" Katniss yelled.

"Haymitch, I think it's time that we sat them down and gave them the safe sex talk. And the regular sex talk. You know, how it all works," Finnick joked, moving his hands around. They didn't ever realize Peeta had stood up and yanked his pants out of Johanna's hands and he tossed them to Katniss.

"I mean really, did you two think I never noticed your clothes just thrown around the room? Her bra was just hanging out on my bed one day," Johanna laughed. Katniss had pulled the pants up under the blanket and jerked herself out of the bed and stomped past all of them into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

"Hey, I need to get in there! That's why I'm back so I can take a shower," Johanna called out.

"FUCK OFF!" Katniss snapped. Peeta's eyes widened, and the three of them burst out laughing.

"She cussed at me! I love when she cusses at me," Johanna laughed.

"Can you please just leave her alone, and get out of here," Peeta said, mortified. Finnick pulled on Johanna's arms.

"Alright leave them alone. You can take a shower in my compartment," Finnick said as he yanked her out.

Luckily, the three of them didn't acknowledge what happened after that. Peeta was thankful for that because Katniss was mortified. But luckily, they just kept Katniss and Peeta's humiliation to themselves.

"Isn't Peeta's birthday in a few days?" Johanna asked. Katniss looked up at her from the floor. She was sitting down there and folding all their clothes that Johanna had washed from the whole week before.

"Peeta told me, "she said as she was making the beds from just washing the sheets. "What are you gonna do for him?" she asked. Katniss scoffed.

"There's nothing to do for him. We're stuck in here," Katniss said bitterly.

"What'd you do last year?" Johanna asked. Katniss blushed as she remembered.

That night was special to Katniss. They took a totally unexpected, but completely satisfying turn in their relationship. That was the first night that her and Peeta were intimate with each other. It was the first time she ever experienced an orgasm. It was the first night that they had taken off their pajama pants, and he had seen her panties. It was a big step for them. But she was happy about it. Despite having to hide the fact that they were near each other, it was the first time she got to experience being a couple. In a relationship with Peeta. And she loved it.

Had that really been an entire year ago?

"Earth to Katniss," Johanna said, knocking Katniss out of her thoughts. She shook her head and cleared her throat.

"We tried to have dinner at the Bakery. Which was a total disaster. But then we went back to his house. And I gave him sheet music paper. He had been writing some songs in a notebook," Katniss told her.

"Well, if you can't think of anything else, you can always try and new sex position," Johann told her, smiling widely. Katniss glared at her.

"We aren't having sex," she gritted through her teeth. Joanna just chuckled and nodded her head and walked over to where she was sitting.

"That's right. You aren't having sex. But I know you've been fooling around. I saw it in your eyes at the Training center. You're no virgin when it comes to at least experiencing an orgasm. So, tell me what you've done so far, and I'll tell you what else you can do," Johanna said. Katniss knocked over a pile of Peeta's clothes when she suddenly stood up.

"I'm leaving," Katniss snapped. She took a step to leave, but Johanna grabbed her arm.

"Oh, come on. Stop it. Just sit down and talk to me. It's normal for girls to talk about sex. I promise to be gentle," she took her over to the couch and made her sit down. Johanna sat sideways and curled her feet under her.

"Ok. Let's start off easy. Has he rubbed you down there?" Johanna said, trying to be gentle with her words. She didn't want to scare Katniss off or make her clam up.

Katniss nodded her head. "Over or under your panties?" she asked. Katniss was blushing and couldn't even look at Johanna.

"Both," she admitted.

"Ok then. That's a start. Has he fingered you?" Katniss looked over, confused. "Ok, no. Trust me. You would know if he fingered you. Have you used your hand on him?" Katniss nodded. "Alright. I'm gonna guess you haven't used your mouth on him yet.

Johanna tried so hard not to laugh when Katniss turned her face. She looked disgusted. "Down there? That's gross," she said. Johanna chuckled softly.

"Well, no need to go further with the mouth questions. So let me guess now. You guys basically have been dry humping the hell out of each other," Katniss didn't know what she was talking about again. "Rub up against each other to get an orgasm," she clarified. Katniss nodded her head.

"Ok, I think we're getting somewhere. Is he always the one on top?" she nodded her head. Johanna's eyes widened with excitement and threw her hands up in the air.

"BINGO! Alright, I know what you're doing. You're gonna be the one on top this time. You'll just straddle him, sit on his lap, and you'll be the one to rub up against him. He can lay down or sit up. If you sit up, sit on the couch here because you can grab onto the back of it for leverage. But all you have to do is move your hips back and forth and grind right into him and BOOM. Happy birthday Peeta!"

Peeta was the first one to wake up on the morning of his birthday. He honestly hadn't slept all that well. He was thinking of being in the Capitol last time on his 18th birthday. It was one of the worst days. He was able to hold Johanna's hand through a hole in the wall in the corner of the floor. They just cried together. They told stories of if he was in 13 with Katniss, how he would be spending his day.

He had held onto Katniss pretty tight that night. He just needed the reassurance that she was still there. That he was with her. That he was safe in District 13. He wanted a second chance for his 18th birthday. And he wanted to enjoy every second, being with her.

He looked over and was surprised to see Johanna. He must have fallen asleep a few hours ago, and didn't even hear her come in. She snuck out most nights to be with her mystery guy, whoever that was. He tried to pull Katniss even closer to him, and his movements must have disturbed her. He felt her stretch and then started turning slightly. She saw that he was awake and turned completely in his arms. She smiled softly, her eyes still drooping.

"Hi," she whispered. He smiled.

"Hi," he said as she pulled in closer.

"Happy birthday," she said. Hearing those words from her did something to him in that moment. It was healing. It was loving. He ached for her on his birthday. All he wanted to hear her say was Happy Birthday.

He buried his neck in her neck and stayed there for a moment. He tried to squeeze his eyes shut and will himself not to cry. He was with Katniss. He was with Katniss. He had to keep reminding himself of that. He felt her pulling back to look at him. Her eyes were more opened now, and she was looking at him worriedly. She cupped his face.

"What's wrong?" she whispered. He shook his head. "Peeta you're shaking. What's wrong? Tell me,"

"All I wanted," he swallowed down a tiny sob. "Was to be with you," he softly choked out. Her face said everything. She knew exactly what he meant. She grabbed him tighter and held him. She squeezed him so tight that he slightly felt her cutting off his air way. But he could still breathe. He didn't care. He just needed to hold her. He just needed to feel her body. Make it feel real.

"I'll spend the whole day with you," she said. He nodded his head. "Just don't think about it. You're ok now," she whispered. She made some noise in her throat that was some obnoxious sound. But she was trying not to cry, and totally failing.

"I'm so sorry Peeta. Please don't think about that," she whispered.

"I just wanted to be with you," he whispered again.

"What am I? Chopped liver?" Johanna griped. They both gasped and then broke apart and looked at her, stunned. But then Katniss burst out laughing and Peeta broke out into a smile. That's why he loved Johanna. He knew she was adamant on not letting him dwell on their time in the Capitol. Even though she sometimes did. She was hypocritical in that sense, but he knew she loved him enough, that she didn't want to see him hurt.

He completely changed. He felt good in just an instant. He wiped at his face and then he couldn't help it. He jumped over Katniss and practically fell on Johanna, making her grunt to hug her. Both the girls laughed.

"Thank you," Peeta said. Johanna looked over at Katniss.

"Get your damn boyfriend off of me. Doesn't this make you mad that he's laying on top of me like this?" she demanded. Katniss smiled.

"I think you're the only one that I wouldn't get mad about," she admitted. Johanna rolled her eyes.

"The least these assholes could do is give someone better meals on their birthday. More food at least," Johanna complained as she dropped her tray loudly on the table and then plopped herself down.

"Why are you complaining? It's my birthday?" Peeta chuckled.

"Because you were going to share some food with me," she snapped as she picked her spoon up and tilted it, watching the oatmeal fall back into the bowl.

"Oh, I was? Sorry," Peeta told her as more of their friends and family started joining them. Wheet moved over, smiling so Ryee could sit next to Johanna.

"I still think I need to get knocked up so I could get more food," she said, rolling her eyes and made Ryee choke a little on his apple. A few of them chuckled, and Wheet pounded his back.

"Yeah, well we all know who could do the knocking up," Finnick murmured to Katniss and Peeta, making them laugh as well.

Peeta wondered if Johanna really didn't know how much Ryee liked her. He was in love with her. She was a Goddess to him. Johanna was always with this mystery guy, sneaking out practically every night to see him. Ryee must have figured it out. Peeta knew how Ryee felt. He had been in love with Katniss for so long, but she didn't even know he was alive at first. And then she kept him at arm's length. He understood exactly how Ryee felt like right now.

He was pulled out of his thoughts by someone kissing his cheek. He looked up and saw Prim. "Happy Birthday Peete," she said as she leaned down and hugged him.

"Thanks Prim," Peeta said. Posy shot between them and shoved something into Peeta's face.

"I made you a pink cookie. Like what you make me," Posy told him. He looked down at a pink circle with drawings all over it. "And those are the icings," she said, pointing to her drawings. It touched him that she made this for him.

"Does it look like the cookies you make me?" she asked. He leaned down and kissed her cheek.

"These look even better than my cookies. You might just put me out of a job," she jumped up and down excitedly.

"Happy birthday Peeta," Posy said.

"Thank you for making this for me. It's beautiful," he said and hugged her.

Katniss was surprised by how Peeta woke up. She didn't think that he would feel so strongly about what happened last time. Not that he didn't feel anything, it was just…she didn't see that coming about his birthday. She thought he would just be happy…but she was an idiot.

She remembered what it was like that day…

"Katniss, are you coming down for breakfast?" Prim asked. Katniss shook her head and turned towards the wall. She waited until her mom and Prim left to start sobbing.

It was his birthday. His birthday! And Coin still hadn't sent her soldiers into the Capitol to rescue him. What were they doing to him? Were they hurting him more because it was his birthday? Were they making his torture worse?

She just wanted to talk to him. She just wanted to see him. She wished more than anything she could hug him. Just hold him. She wanted to kiss him, like they kissed on the beach. It was his birthday, and he should be here! He should be with her!

She didn't know how much time went by. Enough for Prim to come back and leave again, only to have Haymitch come in. He sat down on her and put his hand on her shoulder.

"It's his birthday," she sobbed.

"I know sweetheart…I know," was all he could say.

"Are you ok?" Peeta asked as they were walking to dinner.

"What?" she asked.

"I was talking to you and you just kinda zoned out. Are you ok?" he asked, worried about her. She smiled at him.

"Yeah. Sorry," she said and kissed his cheek. That was what worried him. He didn't like when she zoned out like that.

"So why are we going to dinner so late tonight?" Peeta asked as he looked at his arm. "Do they even serve dinner this late?" Peeta asked. Katniss shrugged.

"I didn't think so," she said. They walked into the cafeteria and Peeta and Katniss jumped a mile high.

"SURPRISE!" Ryee yelled. Everyone was standing there, staring at Ryee.

"Why would you do that?" Katniss demanded. Ryee looked around at everyone, confused.

"What do you mean? It's a surprise party. You're supposed to yell SURPRISE when they walk in the door," Ryee defended himself.

"Not at a Victor!" Everyone said. Ryee looked around and then crossed his arms.

"I swear to God you all make up these stupid rules about Victors! Happy freaken birthday!" Ryee said, waving his hand and he went and sat down. Peeta looked over at Katniss.

"Did you know about this?" Peeta asked.

"Not about the idiot yelling surprise at me when I walk in," Katniss grumbled. Peeta just smiled and looked around.

"So, you guys are throwing me a birthday party?" Peeta said as he walked further into the cafeteria.

"WITH FOOD!" Johanna said as she had a plate filled. She moaned in happiness.

"Where did we get actual good food?" Peeta asked. Effie jumped up excitedly, clapping her hands.

"Oh, that one was all me. I got it from the Capitol," Peeta just stared at her. "The Capitol was sending some food and drinks to the Peacekeepers on a job well done. And I intercepted it and had it all sent here for us to gorge ourselves on, and let Johanna take all the leftovers back to your compartment," Effie said, eyeing Johanna.

"It'll at least stop her from bitching for a week. She'll be too full to run her mouth," Chaff said, making him and Haymitch laughed loudly.

Peeta watched the two of them for a moment. He had never seen Haymitch in such a good mood. Him and Chaff had been spending so much time together lately. Haymitch had lived a really lonely life since he won his Games. Once his family was murdered, he was all alone. He met all the other Victors on the Victory Tour. He got to go back once a year to the Capitol and be with the other Victors, and then when the Victory Tour rolled through District 12, he got to be with the Victors of whoever won that year.

Haymitch had been living for those moments to be with them again, every six months. And now, Haymitch was getting to be with everyone, all the time. Never having to watch what they say and do. He had unlimited time with everyone. It made Peeta happy, to see Haymitch having so much fun.

He shook his head and cleared his throat as he started walking towards the table with food.

"So why are you guys making such a big deal about my birthday? Wasn't Finnick's just last week? And Librae's the week before. And wasn't it Seeder's before that?" Peeta asked.

He realized that the room got awfully quiet all of a sudden, and he looked up. It swiftly dawned on him why they were making such a big deal. Because on his last birthday, he was being tortured in the Capitol.

It started becoming a little harder to breathe, and his heart started beating fast. They were celebrating that he wasn't in the Capitol this time. He gulped and looked away, digging his fingers into his eyeballs. They were celebrating for him.

He didn't even know what to say to that. He just felt…loved by all of them. Haymitch had said so many times, how so many of them felt guilty for what happened to Peeta. They felt guilty in their part for not being able to save him. They wanted to do something for him. And he was touched. He felt kinda stupid for getting emotional about it. But it was normal to feel like that right?

He had been feeling on the verge of a breakdown all day. If it wasn't for Katniss constantly being by his side all day. She was constantly touching him in some way. Even if they were just sitting next to each other, like they were at lunch. Their bodies were still touching. He could physically feel her. He needed to constantly remind himself that he was with her.

"You ok?" Finnick asked, squeezing his shoulder. Peeta nodded his head. He waited a minute and then cleared his throat to turn around. He smiled at everyone.

"Thank you…this means…so much to me. Thank you," He saw his dad and brothers on the other side, looking a little…defeated? Ryee knew a lot of what happened to Peeta. He and Haymitch were forced to tell him after he had heard Katniss yelling at Peeta how she left him in District 13 and wrote him off. They didn't tell Ryee everything, but they told him enough. And who knows, Ryee had probably already found out the full story. Peeta was sure he had told Wheet everything he knew. But he figured he didn't tell his father a lot of it. They worried about telling Peeta's dad. Why should he have to carry that burden and have that knowledge? His father already felt guilty enough for how Peeta and his brothers had been raised. And he felt guilty enough about how he had been treated after he won the Games. How they didn't even move in with him. How at 16 years old, he was left to live by himself.

No. No one would tell Peeta's father about the hijacking.

He and Katniss sat down, and he felt her eyes on him. He looked up and she blushed for openly staring at him. "What is it?" he asked her softly. She looked back up at him and she pushed some hair off his face.

"I'm glad I get to spend your birthday with you," she whispered. Then she leaned in and kissed him. Katniss wasn't one to give affection in public if it was her choice. But it touched him that she was now. It showed how far they had come. How far she had come. This kiss was for them, and it didn't matter who saw it.

She pulled back and she took his hand in hers and squeezed. "I just have to touch you to make sure it's real. I have to do that a lot with you now," she admitted. She was whispering, but he had hoped no one could hear her.

It made him sad though that she felt like that since they got to 13. He already knew that she went back and forth so much, between what happened, and what was happening. He pulled her hand up to his mouth and kissed her hand.

"I know. Me to,"

"Happy birthday," she said. She had said that a few times that day.

A little while later they came out with a cake for him. "I just want to thank you guys for doing this…" He kinda moved his mouth around because he felt emotional. He tried to keep it together. "This was perfect. And I don't think any of you will ever know how much this means to me," he smiled at them and nodded his head, looking at the floor.

"This made up for a lot for me. And I'm lucky to have all you guys in my life," he said, sticking his fingers in his eyes.

"Will someone please cut the damn cake already?" Haymitch grumbled, making everyone laugh.

Later that night, Peeta had just gotten out of the shower. Johanna wasn't coming back that night, so it was just him and Katniss. And that meant…it was just him in his boxer shorts. He opened the door, and Katniss was tidying up a little and looked up at him and smiled. He walked over and kissed her, resting his hands on her hips.

"Mrs. Everdeen. You are wearing entirely too much clothing," he said, making her burst out laughing. He hooked his fingers around the top of her pants. "I'll just get rid of these," he said as he pushed them down her legs. He smiled and looked up at her.

"Orange panties. My favorite color," he whispered and kissed her softly. He went to the hem of her shirt and went to pull the shirt up when her hands stopped him. He pulled back in confusion. "What's the matter?" he asked. She bit her lip again. She was nervous.

"Um…just sit on the couch," she told him, biting on her thumb. He raised an eyebrow, but then did as she said.

"Ok," she looked at him sitting there, trying to decide what to do. She pulled her shirt over her head, and he instantly felt himself harden. She was beautiful. Her breasts were perfect, and he was dying to wrap his mouth around one of her nipples.

Before he could ponder further, she did something unexpectedly and straddled him, sitting in his lap facing him. His eyes widened a little.

"What are you doing?" he asked, smiling. Excided by where this was going. She leaned down and kissed him, pushed her tongue into his mouth. He wrapped his arms around her neck, and then felt her moving in his lap. He broke the kiss and looked down. She was purposely moving her hips back and forth. He threw his head back and moaned.

"Does that feel good?" she asked. He picked his head up and nodded quickly.

"God yes!" he gripped her hips as she rubbed against him. He was so turned on. She had never taken control like this before. She had never gotten on top of him. He thought he was going to burst at any moment just from the sheer fact that she was taking control.

He couldn't help it, he leaned forward and captured one of her nipples in his mouth, and pinched the other one, while wrapping his arm around her back. She moaned loudly as she pushed harder into him.

He pulled back and watched her for a moment before he attacked her neck. He attacked any spot he could. The sensation of her rubbing across his erection was driving him insane.

After who knows how long he pulled back to get some air. He looked at her face and saw the concentration. He watched her hips in his lap. It was a whole new experience for Katniss. She was controlling her own orgasm. And he loved it.

He wanted to grab her hips and grind her down harder. But he forced his hands down and let her do it. He was mesmerized. "You have no idea how beautiful you look like right now," he whispered. She opened her eyes and moaned and as she squeezed his shoulders.

"I want you to make yourself have an orgasm. I want you to get it yourself. I want you to grind down on me and make yourself cum," he told her. He loved how she always reacted to his words. Just from the sound of his voice. She squeezed him tighter, and her head fell down, pushing against his forehead. He squeezed the couch harder to distract his hands. He wanted to help her reach her-their orgasms together. But he wanted her to do it herself.

He felt her start to grind harder. He knew her body so well. "Katniss you're so close. Harder," he whispered. Just the mere sight of her was making him lose control. He was trying so hard to hold off.

"Move faster baby," he told her. She whimpered in his ear. He felt it. He knew she was right there. "Let it go," he told her, as he too started letting go.

She practically was crying as her orgasm ripped through her body. He finally put his hands on her and wrapped his arms around her body to hold her as they both came together.

She collapsed against him, breathing heavily into his shoulder. After a few minutes he picked her up, making her yelp in surprise, and forcing her to wrap her legs around him to hold on. He walked over to the bed and laid down on top of her.

"That was the single most hottest thing that have ever done," he told her, causing her to laugh and blush, and then making her cover her face. He chuckled and kissed her ear, and she pulled her hands back. "You can take control any time you'd like to," he told her.

"Thank you," she joked.

"Remember when I said last year was the best birthday I ever had?" he asked her. She nodded her head. "This is now the best birthday I've ever had,"

Peeta and Katniss fooled around a few more times before eventually falling asleep. Peeta couldn't help but love when they were able to sleep alone, and they could only be in their underwear. He was deliriously happy. He couldn't help but be happy and this. It sounded stupid, but Peeta Mellark FINALLY had a sex life.

It's something that his brothers would always talking about growing up. Even quiet Wheet. Ryee would exaggerate and always talked about having a sex life. And the two of them would tease Peeta about not having one because he was obsessed with Katniss.

But now things were different. He and Katniss had a sex life. Not that they were having sex…yet. But every time they tried something knew, they were closer and closer to that day. But that would not happen until they were out of District 13.

If his brothers could hear his ridiculous thoughts right now. They would never stop harassing him!

Peeta was rudely interrupted with his morning thoughts when he heard someone knocking on the door. Katniss slept through it. He carefully pulled himself away from her and out of bed, and covered her with the blanket, so it didn't expose her.

He opened the door, and it was Haymitch. He looked down at Peeta's state of undress and gave him a knowing look. Peeta rolled his eyes.

"Get your head out of the gutter. What's up?" Peeta whispered.

"A meeting in Command bright and early. Katniss has to come," Haymitch said. Peeta crossed his arms.

"She won't come though," Haymitch smiled.

"I'm fully aware of that. But I promised to pass along the message. I'll meet you there," Haymitch joked and left. Peeta went back into the compartment and got dressed. He brought Katniss a shirt and pants, and lightly shook her. She opened her eyes drowsily.

"Hey, I'm sorry to wake you. But they called in some early morning meeting. I'm gonna go for a little while," he told her. She yawned and closed her eyes and he chuckled. "Let's just put your shirt back on. I'll leave your pants next to you," he said and pulled her up. Her eyes still closed.

He pulled the shirt over her, and she laid back down. She was already asleep again and he kissed her temple and left.

Katniss woke up a few hours later and got ready for the day. She didn't like that their morning was ruined by some stupid Command meeting. As she was getting dressed, Johanna and Prim walked in to meet her for breakfast.

"Hey," she said and pulled on her tank top.

"Hey, are you ready for breakfast?" Prim asked. Both the girls stopped and just looked at her. The girls looked at each other and Prim covered her mouth, and Johanna just started laughing.

"What?" Katniss asked.

"Nothing. Let's go," Johanna said. Prim gasped and shook her head.

"No, she can't leave," Prim said and tried not to laugh.

"What is the problem?" Katniss demanded. Johanna laughed again.

"You have…hickey's…all over," Prim said, moving her hand in a circle in front of her own body. Katniss goes over to the mirror and gasps. She did have hickeys. She could see them on her neck, her shoulders, and her chest. She pulled her tank top open slightly to look down and could see them on her chest.

"Oh my God," she groaned. Peeta left hickeys all over her. Visible hickeys! She had never been so embarrassed in her life. And Johanna was just laughing.

"Shut up Johanna," she snapped.

"I think it's sweet," Prim said. Katniss turned around and glared at her little sister. A look that she had never given Prim before. "Well, you're in love," she said, smiling at her.

"Could we get her some makeup?" Prim asks Johanna.

"I'm sure Effie has plenty," Johanna told her as Peeta came in and stopped.

"What are you two laughing at?" he asked. He looked over at Katniss, and then his eyes widened as he saw the bright, dark hickeys. "Oh," Johanna laughed louder.

"Oh, he says," she laughs.

"I'll go get Effie's makeup," Prim said, going to move. But Johanna stopped her and ran out to do it. Prim looked uncomfortable in the room. "I'm gonna head down to breakfast,"

"I am so sorry," Peeta said as soon as Prim left.

"I didn't even see these this morning," she complained.

"I'm so sorry Katniss. I just got carried away," before he could say anything, he thought Johanna came back. But it was Finnick, already laughing.

"What the hell are you doing?" she demanded.

"I came in to see all the hickeys. Dang Peeta," Finnick said, slapping Peeta's shoulders. Before either of them could say anything, Haymitch walked in and stopped, and then burst out laughing.

"How many people did Johanna tell?" Peeta demanded. This was not good. Katniss doesn't do well with embarrassment. They had never been in a fight before. But he was sure that he was going to experience their first fight as a couple.

"Well, we know what Katniss gave Peeta for his birthday," Finnick laughed.

"Does he have any hickeys anywhere to?" Haymitch asked, pulling on Peeta's neckline to look down his shirt. Peeta shoved him away. Johanna came back in then laughing, with Effie behind her, makeup in hand. Effie gasps at Katniss and then turns on him.

"PEETA!" Effie gasped. "She is a lady. You don't give a girl hickeys-"Effie scolded, but was interrupted.

"Alright Haymitch, I think it's time to finally sit them down and give them the safe sex talk. No more talk about it, we need to put this into action. They're growing up and starting to leave hickeys everywhere. Clothes are coming off-"Johanna was interrupted. He knew that was what was gonna break Katniss.

She screamed and yanked the makeup out of Effie's hands and ran into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her. Effie ran after and tried to get in, but Katniss locked it. So, she knocked.

"Wait Katniss, you have to prime your face and use concealer and then cover it was foundation. And then you have to set it. Otherwise, there will be splotches and noticeable that you covered up. And you need to blend it with a beauty blender," Effie said, knocking on the door again. Johanna, Haymitch and Finnick couldn't stop laughing.

"Yeah, Katniss knows nothing about makeup," Johanna laughed.

"Alright that's it! Get out!" Peeta said as he started pushing them out of the compartment. He stood there just staring at the door.

"I'm going to get more makeup. I have to blend it on her skin, so no one knows. I'll be right back dear," Effie said as she excused herself. He looked at the door. This was bad. This was so bad. He knocked softly on the door.

"Can I come in?" he asked softly. She tore the door open, and he cringed.

"We're finding out who this guy is that she's sneaking around with!" Katniss sneered. His eyes widened. That's what she was focusing on?

"Baby I'm so sorry. I should have controlled myself better. I shouldn't have done all that where anyone could see," he said. She stared at the floor, crossing her arms, and shuffling around.

"I'm not…I'm not mad at you," she whispered. She wasn't mad? He let out a sigh of relief. "I'm just mad that she told everyone. So, I wanna get her back. We're gonna figure out who she's sleeping with. And her secret won't be a secret anymore," Katniss said, smiling devilishly, that he couldn't help but to laugh. He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I just got carried away last night," he whispered. She wrapped her arms around his neck. Before they could say anything else, Effie came back and clapped at them.

"None of that. You've done enough damage," Effie said and pulled at Peeta's arm and made him step away. She pushed Katniss into a chair and sat down in front of her. "Let me take care of these," Effie said and started working on Katniss.

"What was the early morning meeting about?" Katniss asked. Effie faltered and then cleared her throat, going back to work. Katniss looked at Peeta, but he wouldn't meet her gaze. She knew something bad had happened. And they just didn't want to tell her. She knew why of course. She was a complete mental case now a days.

"Just tell me," Katniss said. Peeta hung his head and then scrubbed his face.

"Snow had the fake me, and Johanna on another video last night…The fake me was…he looked terrible. Both of them did," Peeta said sadly. Katniss knew that he was imagining himself and what they were doing to him last time.

"He was upset. And he told you to stop…and that you had hurt him by everything you were doing. And that you were wrong. And he was disappointed," Peeta said, finally meeting her eyes.

She wasn't surprised. Haymitch already told her. This time around, Snow had different advisors around him. They were telling him to do different things. It terrified her though. What if they royally screwed everything up for them.

The makeup had done its job, and they didn't tease Katniss. Peeta was eternally grateful, but that didn't stop them from harassing him. It had gotten out with all their group. Johanna made sure of that one.

Johanna went down to the loading dock out of boredom. She knew they were taking supplies to District 1. She hopped up on one of the crates. "What's shaking Hawthorne?" she asked, getting Gale's attention. He smiled at her.

"Just packing up some supplies," he told her.

"Really. I couldn't tell," she said sarcastically. He rolled his eyes, and then Madge appeared.

"Hey Johanna," Madge said as she walked over with a small box and put it down. "Are you coming with us?" she asked. Johanna snorted.

"Please. I don't do manual labor,"

"Yeah, no kidding," Gale said as he stacked another box.

"How come you're going?" she asked Madge. She jumped a little on her feet.

"Because I really see District 1. Gale told me how beautiful it is there. I don't even care if it's ugly. I just wanna see another District. I'm kinda excited," she smiled. Johanna looked over Gale.

"She's like, completely adorable. You better hold onto this one," Johanna said, making both of them blush. "I need you to get me something while you're there Hawthorne," Johanna told him. He sighed and put his hands on his hips.

"I'm not getting you Morphling or shoes or some electronic toy," Gale griped.

"Oh, stop it. It's nothing like that. I need you to go to one of the hospitals or infirmaries or whatever they have and get me a birth control shot," Johanna said. Gale and Madge just stared at her in shock. "13 don't have them," they still just stared at her.

"What? I like to have sex. And I don't want a District 13 baby. I don't want a baby period. So, I need you to be a doll and get me a birth control shot," she said and smiled at him. Madge covered her mouth, smiling.

"You're seriously asking me to get you birth control?" he demanded.

"Yes. I'm asking you to get me some," she snapped at him. He just glared at her. "I would do it for you," she told him. He glared at her and then kissed his cheek.

"And while you're at it. Get some Morphling for Marlah. The one from 11 who won the year before Peeta and Katniss. She's still trying to sleep since the first 74th Games, and she lost Thresh and Rue. The first mentoring Games are always the hardest,"

"It's so nice just to breathe the fresh air," Rue said with her arms out wide and just spun in a circle.

"Those trees look good to jump from," Thresh said as he pointed up. Rue stopped and then smiled brightly, and then took off running, and jumping onto the tree to climb. The three of them laughed as Rue disappeared into the trees.

"I always wanted to watch her do that. She's so light on her feet," Peeta said as he plopped down on the little hill, leaning back on his elbows as he looked down at the stream.

"She's always been like that," Thresh said as he laid down, spreading out his arms and legs and closing his eyes, enjoying the sun on his face.

"'I've had so many dreams of her doing just that," Katniss said as she sat next to Peeta. He smiled up at her. He knew she had dreams like that. Katniss sometimes talked in her sleep, and she'd talked about Rue in the trees a few times.

"Well, now you get to see it up close," Thresh said as he laughed at Rue.

"What's the first thing you're gonna do when we get out of here Thresh?" Rue called up from the trees. The three of them laughed at her.

"I'm gonna take my grandmother to the beach, and let her sink her toes in the sand," he said without hesitation.

"I think that's the first thing everyone wants to do," Peeta chuckled. He looked up at the trees at Rue, who was hanging upside down from a branch. "What about you?" Peeta asked.

"I already told my mom and dad. We're going to District 7 first. I wanna get lost in the trees," she said as she swung her body around, so she was holding on by her hands, just to swing to another branch.

"What about you, Girl on Fire?" Thresh asked.

"I'm going back to 12, and I'm sleeping for the next five years," Katniss said. Peeta leaned down and kissed her cheek.

"Soon enough,"

"Can you make this tighter? Oh, how about you make my boobs look bigger," Johanna told Cinna as he worked on her uniform to leave for the Capitol in. "Maybe some high heeled boots," she said as she posed in front of the mirror. Cinna laughed.

"You realize you'll be storming the Capitol, right?" Cinna asked her.

"Running through the sewer. Running from that black goo," Finnick told her.

"Just how do you plan to run from all that in heels?" Portia asked as she was fitting Finnick.

"I'm part of the Star Squad. I'm supposed to be the hottest one out there," she said. They just laughed at her. "Could you make it so my butt looks bigger then?" they were laughing and looked at the door as Gale and Madge came in. Gale stomped up to her and held out a box. Johanna clapped her hand.

"Thanks peaches," she said and pinched his cheek. "Alright Cinna, I have places to go. People to- "

"Do?" Finnick asked. She whipped her head around and wiggled her eyebrows.

"You know it," Johanna said as she stepped out of her uniform and left and went back to her compartment. Katniss was the only one there and was just laying down, staring at the wall.

Johanna hated when she did that. Peeta hated when she did that. This was like the calm before the storm with Katniss. Something was brewing in her head that always led her to have some type of mental episode. Johanna knew what she was thinking. It was getting closer and closer to the moment that Snow bombs District 13.

She shook her head and plopped down on her bed and pulled her arm up.

"Sit up. I have something for you," Johanna said. Katniss yawned and sat against the wall.

"What is it?" she asked, as Johanna opened the box and pulled out a needle with a cap on it. "I don't need any morphling right now, thanks," Katniss said and rolled her eyes Johanna laughed.

"It's not morphling. It's a birth control shot," Katniss shook her head to get the sleepiness out of her.

"Is it that serious with mystery man?" she asked.

"I already got mine in the Capitol during the Quell. This one's for you," Johanna said. Katniss' heart stopped. Joanna was putting birth control into her body? Birth control was to stop you from getting pregnant. But that meant that her and Peeta were having sex. She just wasn't ready for that. She shook her head.

"No, I'm not taking that. Me and Peeta aren't even there yet. We're not having sex," she said as she went to get up, but Johanna pulled her back and rolled her eyes.

"Yes, you are. You need it,"

"Me and Peeta aren't having sex Johanna!" she said sternly. Was this girl crazy?

"Not yet. But I saw the hickeys. And you guys fool around, around my schedule, making sure I won't be here. And when I don't sleep here," but Katniss shook her head.

She wasn't ready-they weren't ready for that next step. Oh, who was Katniss kidding. Peeta was ready to be that intimate with Katniss. He had been ready for years. She was sure that Peeta thought when they got back from their first Games that they would be shortly taking that next step. She knew that Peeta was taking it slow because she wasn't ready. Because she wasn't mentally stable enough.

"Katniss it's not like this means you HAVE to take that next step. No one's forcing you to,"

"We're not ready," Katniss whispered.

"And that's fine. This shot doesn't mean you have to rush into anything. It's not like if you're hungry, now you have to eat! Just because you're on birth control, it doesn't mean you have to have sex," she told her. Katniss still didn't believe her.

"It's your first time. You should wait for the right moment to have sex. That moment could be a year from now, or that right moment might be a month from now," Katniss just looked at her. "You don't know when you're gonna change your mind. Look how far you and Peeta have taken it already. And you don't know when your right moment is right now. And if you decide, two months from now, that it's the right time…now you're protected. That's all this is Katniss. It's security so you have the freedom to choose when the right time is, and the freedom for the right to bring a baby into this world," Johanna told her.

She hadn't even thought of that. Birth control was just protecting her from having a baby. She didn't ever want babies. She knew that for the rest of her life, as long as she was with Peeta, she'd never have children. This was going to be her protection for the rest of her life. Johanna was absolutely right.

She pulled up her shirt sleeve and Johanna smiled. She gave her the shot and pulled her sleeve down.

"There. Now you're free to fuck each other's brains out," she said, and wiggled her eyebrows, making Katniss laugh.

When would Katniss be ready to do that with Peeta? Could it happen while they're in 13? Or after the war? What if Katniss was never ready to be with Peeta in that way. What if she could never handle it? Mentally? What if it was too much for her to handle? Would he wait so long for her? Would he wait forever for her? She couldn't do that to him. She never could. Why was he even with her?

"Will you stop freaking out! Get out of your head. This wasn't to push you. This is just a security blanket. If it runs out without you ever doing it. Good. You weren't ready. You had the freedom to choose. Go get it again. You might have to get a few rounds of 6-month shots before you're ever ready. It doesn't matter. Stop over thinking this," Johanna told her. Katniss nodded her head. A thought suddenly struck her.

"Does it…does it hurt?... The first time?" she asked softly, totally embarrassed. Johanna let out a deep breath.

"Well…there are a lot of factors that go into that. Yes, it'll hurt, but then it might not. If Peeta goes slow, which we all know he will because he doesn't want to hurt you, and he lives and breathes for your happiness," she said, making Katniss smile. "Then eventually it starts to go away, and then it feels good,"

"What are…the other factors?"

"Do you really want me to answer that? Because I'm going to be honest," Johanna laughed. Katniss appreciated how gentle she was being with this conversation.

"Yeah, just tell me,"

"Well, for your body, it depends on how…how much your body can fit inside you," she said, chuckling just slightly at her face.

"For the guy, it depends on the size. How long, how wide," she said. Katniss blushed at that. She had held Peeta's erection in her hand. But she had no idea if it was big or small.

"What's…what's normal?"

"Well, for width this usually is," Johanna held up her hand and showed her fingers curling to make a circle. "That's average. But a guy could be bigger," she said and spread out her fingers slightly. She never paid attention to that when she had her hand on him. Then she held both her hands apart.

"This is average for how long. But you're lucky if it's bigger," she said as she slowly made her two fingers move further away from each other. So was Peeta big, or average? She wasn't sure.

"If he's careful, then it'll hurt a lot less. And don't get frustrated if you don't have an orgasm, and he does. Even if it takes more times do get there. It's easier for guys. You just have to figure sex out. You have to figure out your bodies, and how to handle them, and what feels good," she told her. Katniss blushed again.

"You've had some time to figure some things out. So, you know more then you did a year ago. Just don't get frustrated,"

"So, what did bring you back from District 2 for Johanna?" Finnick asked as he, Gale, Peeta, Ryee and Thresh walked down the hall towards the cafeteria for dinner. Gale rolled his eyes.

"Johanna wanted a birth control shot," Gale said. Peeta chanced a look at his brother. He was sure that hurt Ryee to know she was sleeping with someone. It was a pretty hot topic around the group.

"So, who's the lucky guy she's sleeping with that she needed to get that all of a sudden?" Gale chuckled.

"Johanna doesn't need birth control. She's gotten a shot in the Capitol the past few years when we have to mentor. That wasn't for her," Finnick said. They all looked at Finnick strangely.

"Then why did she ask for it?" Peeta asked. Finnick looked at him, giving him an amused smile. Gale shifted around uncomfortably. He looked over at Ryee and Thresh who were trying to hold in their laughs.

"That was pretty clever. I guess my big mouth ruined that one," Finnick joked. Peeta realized why Johanna got it. She got it for Katniss. Because he gave her so many hickeys. And Johanna knew they had been fooling around constantly. He gulped.

He had never thought about their relationship taking that turn. And by that he meant using birth control. He had been dumb and only thought of the making love part.

"Can you guys not mention that you know. Or tell anyone else? Please?" It was a long shot. But they actually kept their mouths shut.

Peeta had a migraine the next morning. He was sitting in Command again. With the Star Squad, and all their helpers behind the scenes. He hated these stupid meetings, with Plutarch coming up with some new propo idea to torture them all with.

It wasn't just some of the Star Squad though. She had called a lot of Victors in for this one. And a lot of the Tributes from his Games.

"What I would like to know, is why Mrs. Everdeen is never in these meetings?" Coin asked. Everyone stayed silent. "She's the Mockingjay. The face of the Rebellion. And she never comes to meetings," Coin said. How could Coin not know why Katniss wasn't here?

"Katniss isn't mentally stable enough to sit through these meetings. They take too much out of her. She trusts all of us to make the right decisions. And she'll do whatever she needs to as the Mockingjay. But she trusts me enough, that I-we all have her best interests at heart. She's gonna go with whatever the group thinks is good," Peeta told her kindly.

"So, what you're telling me is that you basically dictate Katniss' life now," Coin said. Everyone looked at him. He could bite her head off. He should bite her head off. But he couldn't do that yet. They still had a long way to go before this ended. And taking Coin down now would cause all kinds of problems. So, he smiled.

"She trusts me with her life. I never tell that woman what to do. Believe me, I've tried a few times. She's ignored anything I've ever told her. She's ignored anything anyone has told her. When anyone tried to tell her to do something, she'll always do the complete opposite," Peeta said, remembering moments here and there. Like when Gale was being whipped, he told her to go home. But she didn't listen.

"Even when she knows I'm right," Haymitch said indignantly. Peeta gave Haymitch a half smile, and he heard a couple of soft chuckles. He turned back to Coin.

"When I go back home to her, I tell her about what's coming next, and I leave the decision up to her. If she doesn't want to do something, she won't do it. And no one in this room is going to fight her on it. If she wants something changed, then we change it. But I ask her. I never tell Katniss what to do. Why do you think she's not here? Because you told her she had to be here," Peeta said. It was the truth. Katniss knew Coin and Plutarch wanted Katniss in these meetings. And that's when she always hid out somewhere else.

"I want her in the next Command meetings," Coin told him. Johanna laughed.

"So, basically what you're saying is that you don't want Katniss here," Johanna said. Coin whipped around to glare at her. "He just told you, if you tell her what to do, she won't do it. If you want her to show up, start telling her that you don't want her anywhere near Command during a meeting. Then she'll show up just to piss everyone off," Johanna snarked at her.

"I think we're getting off track here. I have an amazing idea for a propo. It's why I've asked all the Tributes from the 74th Games. I wanna get all 24 of you together in one video. Hugging and laughing. Showing unity," Plutarch said, linking his hands together. Peeta dug his fingers into his eyes.

"What is this man smoking?" Johanna asked.

"Cleary some shit that they cooked up in some bathtub down here," Haymitch said.

"I know I'm a little bit…mental sometimes, switching back and forth between my Games, but even I know that's a crazy idea. And I'm considered crazy," Librae said, sitting back and crossing his arms. Finnick and Cinna were on either side of him and laughed, each patting his back.

"Listen, I know that we're going to have to let all of Panem know that they're alive real soon. But you're not gonna film Katniss laughing and hugging everyone, like their best friends. She's close to Rue and Thresh. But she hasn't spent a lot of time with the others. She can't sit there and fake it with them," Peeta said. Then he looked across the table.

"And Clove is getting nowhere near Katniss," Peeta said seriously. Clove smiled.

"Do you seriously have to fight all her battles? This coming from the boy who laid in a river calling out for the girl he had a crush on. You're pathetic and so is-"Peeta scared everyone, including himself when he slammed his hand on the table.

"You sit there and mouth of to us. You have NO idea what it takes to be a Victor. You have no idea the life that she's lived. The life that any Victor has lived. We went into the Games to win. There's a reason why we're called Victors, and not winners. You think you go into the Games to win, and when you come home, you're the winner…but there are no winners in the Hunger Games. No one has ever won the Hunger Games," Peeta said. Staring intensely at her. Everyone nodded their heads. He looked over to the District 1 and 2 Victors.

"She's sits there and runs her mouth about Katniss. And I'm sick of it. You're the Careers. It's time you tell Clove what it's like being a District 1 and District 2 Victor," Peeta told them. Enobaria put her hand up.

"No," she said. Everyone was silent, but then she looked across the table. "Get all the young one's out of here," she said, pointing to all the kids from his Games. "It's bad enough they were in the arena. Keep them innocent…whatever innocence they have left, as long as possible," Enobaria said. Cinna stood up and started walking them all out. Cashmere stood up.

"I've heard you run your mouth plenty of times how you should have won. And how you would have handled it as a Victor. And I'm fucking sick and tired of your mouth," Cashmere said.

"Someone go get the other Victors that aren't here," Axel said. He was from District 6, the 72nd Victor. "If she's gonna sit there and run her mouth, she's going to here everyone's story. Even about the dead Victor's," Axel said. Cinna and Portia were the ones to stand up and leave.

"I'm liking this. I'll be more than happy to tell you how Snow wanted to use my body. And I said no, and he killed all my family. Like my 8-year-old brother," Johanna said dangerously. She leaned forward in her chair. "There are 60 Victors that are still alive. Besides Snow, you're the only one to piss off all 60 of us," Johanna told her.

He couldn't listen to these stories. They were too hard for him to hear. And besides. He knew what was happening the next day. And he had to mentally prepare himself, so Katniss could somehow mentally get through it.

"We have 32 hours before the Capitol is sending in their fleet to bomb us. We need to make arrangements. Have everyone secure their units. Get everything moved and sealed. Anyone who doesn't have a job needs to go down in the lowest bunker, so we don't have mass chaos tomorrow," Coin ordered. She walked out of the room, with Boggs following her. Peeta and Johanna started walking back to their compartment, just as the announcements started.

"That's completely fucking dumb. I'm not going down there for 24 hours just because I don't have job to do. She can kiss my ass. I'm sleeping in my own bed," Johanna complained. Peeta laughed.

"You're not going to hang out with your mystery man tonight?" Peeta asked. Peeta couldn't help that he wanted to know who this guy was that she was sneaking around with. Finnick had even questioned it. But she hadn't even revealed the answer to him.

"Not tonight. Maybe we'll sneak around down in the bunkers where everyone's watching," she joked. They walked into the compartment to see Katniss drying her hair, having just come out of the shower.

"Coin wants us all to go down in the bunkers now to avoid the rush tomorrow, since we don't have jobs to do," Johanna said. Katniss rolled her eyes.

"I've already said it. She can kiss my ass. I'm sleeping here tonight," Katniss said. Johanna looked over at Peeta and smiled. He just shook his head. They were spending way too much time together. "What?"

"I feel like sometimes you two are morphing into the same person," Peeta chuckled as he started taking off his shoes. Katniss and Johanna looked at each other and smiled. Johanna telling everyone about the hickey's didn't get in the way of their friendship.

He really thought the two of them were good for each other. They had a connection that no one else understood. No one else that could connect on that level with either of them. Johanna was the only other person that could break through to her, just long enough for Katniss to finish what she started.

"I'm sleeping in my own bed tonight. I'll go down there tomorrow. I'm not spending extra days down there," Katniss told them. "And make sure to tell Prim to get the damn cat beforehand. I'm not going through that again," Katniss said as she shivered. Peeta rubbed her back. That was a sore spot.

Later that night, when it was just the three of them, they were all lying in bed. Awake. All lost in their own thoughts. Peeta was afraid to fall asleep because of the nightmares he would have. This was the last night before he was injected with trackerjacker venom. Tomorrow was the night that he risked his life to warn Katniss. His heart was racing just thinking about that.

He started feeling Katniss shaking. He pulled her tighter to his chest. "Hey it's ok," he whispered. He knew what she was thinking about. It was the same thing. Except she could only imagine what was happening. He knew what was happening to him. And so did Johanna.

Katniss started breathing heavier and Peeta sat up, turning on the light. "Hey, it's ok," he told her, trying to calm her before her panic attack started. Johanna sat up in bed, her face matching theirs.

"Get up. Get dressed. We're not staying in this compartment tonight," Johanna told them as she stood up and started pulling on clothes.

"They…they hurt you," she breathed.

"Katniss it doesn't matter what happened last time," he tried soothing her. Johanna yanked Katniss by the arm and made her stand up.

"I want you to breathe. You're not going to think about what happened last time, because it's not happening now. Baker boy is completely fine. So get a hold of yourself," Johanna told her sternly and slowly her breath started turning back. "Good. Now get dressed and go down to Finnick's apartment. I'll meet you there," she said and walked out.

"What is she doing?" she asked.

"I have no idea. I've stopped trying to figure her out," he chuckled and the kissed her cheek. "I know this is hard for you," he said and chuckled again.

"It's hard for me to. Just thinking about that time. But I'm so thankful…that it's not like that this time. We're together. And we're safe. That's all that matters. The things that happened to us…they're just memories," Peeta said. She buried her face in his chest and he just held her.

When they got to Finnick's compartment they knocked, but no one answered. So, they sat down and waited for Johanna. "When is this gonna be all over?" Katniss whispered. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

"I wish it would happen soon. I hate what it's doing to you," he said as he pushed some hair back. She took a shaky breath.

"I just keep thinking about them beating you right in front of me. Right in front of the camera. They hurt you so badly," she cried. He pulled her to his chest. This was going to be a long couple of days. These were going to be some of the toughest days for her.

How does he just send her into the fire, knowing she's going to get burned? She was literally going to have a mental breakdown from the next few days. She has to get through the bombing, then get through talking to Snow again, pleading for Peeta's life. He knew she was gonna break down. And he was just letting it happen. It was sickening. He was disgusted with himself.

"Hey what's going on?" Ryee asked as he walked up to them. "Are you ok?" Ryee asked Katniss. She pulled back and nodded.

"She'll be ok," Peeta said and kissed her cheek. He looked back at Ryee. "I thought you already went down to the bottom," Peeta said. Ryee sat against the wall opposite of them.

"Dad and Wheet did. It's so claustrophobic in here. Being down there just makes it feel so much worse. I'm only going down there when I absolutely have to," Ryee said.

"Alrighty then. The party's here," Finnick called as he walked up to them. Katniss covered her mouth when she saw him. Finnick was only in his underwear.

"Finnick…where are your pants?" Peeta asked. Ryee just sat there and laughed.

"I was sleeping down in the bunkers. Johanna woke me up. So, I figured if I'm coming up here, I can just grab some clothes in my compartment. Come on in kiddos," Finnick said and walked in. The other three followed. Katniss started laughing, and Peeta couldn't help but smile. Her laughter happened so rarely down here.

"So, what's Johanna getting us into?" Katniss asked. Peeta looked over at Ryee.

"Wait. Did Johanna get you?" Peeta asked his brother. He shook his head.

"I was just walking by," Ryee said as Finnick grabbed some clothes and went into the bathroom.

"So, you're ok with hanging out with Johanna," Peeta asked him. He just rolled his eyes and shrugged his shoulders.

"I'm over her,"

"Said no Mellark boy ever," Katniss joked. Johanna came back in at the same time that Finnick came out of the bathroom.

"Come baring gifts. And by that, I mean food. Everyone's so distracted that they didn't even see me go into the kitchen and steal us something," she laughed.

"I told you to be careful doing that," Katniss said as she pulled out a sandwich and bit into it. Savoring it. She hated being so limited on food.

"So, tell us what you got planned," Johanna said to Finnick. She pulled out two decks of cars and tossed them at him.

"This, ladies and gentlemen, is a little game I like to call, Ratslap!" Finnick said. Peeta knew exactly what Finnick was doing. This is what he did at the Tribute Center in the Quarter Quell. He did all these crazy games to keep Katniss distracted for two weeks. And it worked. Now, he was going to distract not only Katniss, but himself.

The card game kept them all laughing. The goal was to get all the cards in the deck. They had to put their cards into the pile and see who slapped the pile first. There was major fights that went on during the night. Everyone wanted to prove that their own hand was on more of the pile.

They didn't even realize that it was time for breakfast when they were still playing the game.

"I'm pretty sure Peeta won the most times," Finnick said as he yawned.

"That's because I let you all duke it out. Then I'd sneak in there and grab the piles for myself," Peeta said, proud of himself.

He and Katniss went back to their compartment for a few hours to sleep, but announcements kept going off that no one should still be upstairs if there wasn't a reason to be. Finally, Peeta just gave up and convinced Katniss to go down there. At least they didn't have to hear the announcements anymore once they were there.

As they took their time getting down there, he watched her carefully. He was watching her slowly start to fall down that spiral. He felt like he was just walking Katniss to her death. This just wasn't fair. Katniss startled Peeta as she gasped, and she grabbed at his neck and started crying.

"Katniss what's wrong?" he asked.

"Your blood was…splattered…all over the camera," she sobbed. Oh God, he hadn't even gotten her down there yet. She was already losing it.

"Katniss it's not real ok. I'm right here. I'm not in the Capitol," he hugged her tightly to him. Another loud announcement and she screamed in his ear.

"They're going to kill him," she sobbed. He looked around for anyone. People just stared at them. He saw none of their family. None of their friends. The bombing hadn't even started, and she was already mentally slipping out of what was real and what was happening last time. He pulled her away to look at him, holding her face in her hands.

"Katniss, look at me. I'm right in front of you. I'm in District 13 with you. Just concentrate on me," but she wouldn't stop sobbing. She started shaking and was starting to thrash around. He needed to get her out of here. He knew Cenia was downstairs. He just needed to get to her.

Suddenly someone was standing right there with him, grabbing Katniss' other arm. He was completely stunned. One of the last people he thought would help him. Cato!

"Come on. I'll help you get her down there," Cato said seriously. Glimmer and Marvel were standing with him, and he gulped. He needed help to get her down there. She was grabbing at her hair, sobbing for him. He had no choice but to accept their help. He looked over at the other two.

"I need Cenia. It's Cinna's sis- "

"We know. We talk to her to," Glimmer said. He shook his head. He didn't even realize that they would talk to Cenia as well.

"Please go get her. I don't know if we can get her all the way down there," Peeta said. They nodded and sprinted off. He looked back at Cato. "I just have to get her downstairs," Cato nodded and held onto her arm, and he helped Peeta start walking her towards the stairs.

"Please save him. They're going to kill him," Katniss sobbed. She pulled against them, but they held on tightly. She was fighting moving forward, but they kept pulling her. They only made it down the stairs, maybe three floors before we couldn't get her to move anymore.

"Katniss please. We have to keep moving," he pleaded. But she sat down and covered her face, rocking back and forth and started muttering to herself.

"My name is Katniss Everdeen. I'm seventeen years old. My home is District 12. I was in the Hunger Games. I escaped. The Capitol hates me. Peeta," she sobbed out. "Peeta was left behind. Peeta was taken prisoner. I think Peeta's dead. He's most likely dead. It's probably best if he's dead. They're beating Peeta to death," she muttered.

Peeta didn't know what to do. He swayed on his feet, covering his face. He couldn't take her down all these flights of stairs like this.

"DAMNIT!" Peeta yelled. He wasn't one for using profanity. Not that damnit was much of profanity. But it was just enough. He started looking around. Where was Cenia?

"He's dead. They're killing him right now. I'm so sorry Peeta," she sobbed. Peeta crouched down in front of her and grabbed her hands.

"Peeta, they hurt you because of me. It's all my fault. They hurt you because it's all my fault. I'm so sorry Peeta." she sobbed.

"Shh Katniss. I'm so sorry you had to see that. But it was my fault Katniss. I was willing to get beaten because I wanted to warn you. I knew they were coming after you with bombs. They said they would kill me if I told you they were gonna attack you. I was ready to die Katniss. I would, knowing that the final thing I ever did with my life was protect you. That wasn't your fault. Snow always makes you think that these things were your fault. But they never were Katniss. Please stop believing that they are." he said.

"Plutarch told me to be brave. People are watching me. He didn't even care that they were beating you. I didn't know if you were dead. My heart was beating out of my chest. I needed you. I needed to feel your arms around me. I was just spinning." she cried.

He hated hearing that. She was stuck between this time, and last time. He hated this. He moved up a step and hugged her tightly, trying to soothe her. What was wrong with Plutarch? Why did he have to tell her to be brave?

"But then Prim was missing. We were all ordered down in the bunkers, and she went back for that stupid cat. She went back to save him. She said she couldn't leave him behind because she couldn't live with herself. And I left you behind," she screamed. She pulled back from him.

"Prim's missing. Where is she?" she screamed, searching around.

"Prim's downstairs. Please Katniss get up. We need to go," Peeta pleaded.

"PEETA!" He looked down and could see Cenia running up.

"She keeps going back and forth. I can't calm her down," Peeta told her. He waited a moment before she stood next to them. She squatted down next to Peeta.

"Katniss. I need you to focus on me," Cenia said. Katniss looked at her and started crying.

"He's going to kill him. He's beating him to death," she sobbed. Cenia grabbed her hands.

"Snow doesn't have Peeta, Katniss. Peeta's sitting right here. I need you to focus on me. Listen to the sound of my voice," Cenia told her. Katniss tried to focus on her.

"I want you to tell me what you see,"

"Prim ran back for the cat," she cried. But Cenia held her ground.

"That's not what I asked you. I want you to tell me what you see. Where are you Katniss?" Cenia asked. Katniss shook and looked.

"I'm on the stairs,"

"That's right. You're on the stairs. What else do you see?" she asked. Katniss looked around.

"The stairs…they make a triangle," she said. Cenia nodded her head. Peeta was stunned that she was getting Katniss to focus like this.

"That's right. They form a triangle going down. Tell me what else,"

"The doors…to different floors. And the walls…they're gray," she was starting to slowly clam down. He rubbed his face. Thank God.

"You're right. Now, who's standing with you?" she asked. Katniss looked at Peeta, and her chin quivered.

"Peeta," she whispered. Like she just realized he was there. She was relieved. He nodded her head and took her hands.

"I'm right here Katniss. I'm with you in District 13," he told her. He brought her hands to his lips and kissed them. When would her pain ever stop? They were killing her. It was sucking the life out of her. And it scared him to death.

"They were hurting you," she whispered. He nodded his head.

"I know they were. They did that to me last time. But I'm safe now. I'm right here with you," he told her and cupped her cheek. She closed her eyes and her shoulders started shaking. He leaned over and pulled her to him, and she wrapped her arms around him.

"Please just make this stop. I can't keep doing this. I don't know what's really happening anymore," she sobbed. He couldn't help his own tears that sprung from his eyes. He just needed this all to be over for her.

He was letting everyone torture her. Sending her back into the Hunger Games a third and fourth time was torturing her. Sending her on the Victory Tour a second time was torturing her. Having her go back through this war, putting her on t.v. They were torturing her. And he was just standing by and letting it happen. How could they keep doing this to her? How could he just feed her to the wolves over and over again?

"I'm so sorry Katniss," he told her. He was always so good with words. But words failed him now. She was suffering so badly. And it was breaking his heart.