Previously on Not Another Albus Giant Squid parody.

Read the last chapter again you forgetful mongtard.

Ahem.

Chapter 4. Err...Right. What to put.

What has happened so far?

Goes back and Reads. Err…

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Harry Potter, the Harlem Globetrotters, Cesc Fabregas sigh, My computer or this piece of work.

Sorry about this chapter, the last one and any future ones I write on this fic. This will not be spell checked or read through again. If you don't like it. Take a carrot and shove it.

Not Another Albus Giant Squid Parody.

Chapter 5

Back on the Train

Hermione froze, before, slowly, tortuously, looking upwards. In front of was her, the one, the only, INCARNATION OF ALL THINGS EVIL, TERROR OF WIZARDKIND, LOOOOOORD VOLDERMORRRRRRT…holding a box of tissues.

Dun dun DUUUUUUN!

You could hear a pin drop.

"Dammit," Muttered Voldermort as he peered down at his feet. "They're 20 per knut as well."

Hermione's other problems having been somewhat overshadowed by the appearance of the worlds most feared wizard of all time slunk off muttering. Observe the power of the Ostrich. Muahahaha.

"So," Hermione began.

"Yeah."

More silence.

"Well?" Added Hermione.

"Well what?"

Yet more silence.

"Why are you here?" Sighed Hermione, irritation winning over bladder trembling terror…finally.

"Why am I where?"

"FOR FUCKS SAKE." Screamed Hermione. "Why are you, Lord Voldermort, on the Hogwarts Express? IN MY FUCKING COMPARTMENT!"

"I didn't know Lord Voldermort was on the train," Came the distant voice of Ron.

Due consideration followed this statement.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!"

Thud.

"Ron?" Harry's voice, rusty by disuse, croaked.

Nothing followed this Hermione frowned. Then she noticed voldermort smirking. He had his wand out. Tee hee.

"I'd rather not have any more interruptions." He announced coldly, before pressing the tissue into her hand. "Wipe your face, you look frightful. Not at all satisfactory for the bride of Voldermort."

Thud.

Voldermort shook her limp body slightly. Grinning his hands, as if of their own accord reached for her top.

Fin.

For now.