Lost Your Touch

I pulled my head back from Harry's and looked at his confused eyes. I stood up, let out a sob and ran rushing from the room. The first door I came upon led to the bathroom. Ducking inside; I shut and locked the door. I head footsteps on the other side and held my breath.

"Helen?" Harry's warm voice was concerned, that just made me cry more. The thought that he was concerned about some woman he had only just met and hadn't mentioned his estranged best friend all evening drove me absolutely wild.

"Helen, what's wrong?" The tears dropped silently from my face to the floor, splashing into little puddles against the linoleum.

"Nothing Harry, just…umm…had to brush my teeth that's all."

"You're sure? It wasn't something I did. I'm not going to fast for you or anything?" He sounded like he genuinely cared for Helen Garret. My heart wrenched.

"Honest, I'm fine. Go sit by the fire. There's beer or wine in the fridge if you want some. I think I'm going to have a shower, be out soon." I turned the tap before I could hear his reply and walked over to the mirror.

"You're such an idiot. Why are you so afraid of him. You're the one wrong who screwed it up you fucking cad. Jesus how can you even look at yourself? You're a complete mess. Stupid fucking tears make your eyes blow up like a blowfish you ugly little…" I trailed off and looked down at the sink. "I'm just making excuses, aren't I?"I looked back up at the mirror and nodded. "Yes…you are."

I stepped out of my jeans and pulled my t-shirt over my head. Although I was being stupid (a self-admitted comment) the idea of a shower was probably the best idea I'd had all night. So I stepped under the hot water and let it run over my body. I picked up a washcloth and scrubbed my face free of tears.

I felt better when I emerged from the bathroom. Striding quickly to my room I dressed again, and put my wet hair up in to a ponytail. Walking back into the living room I slipped on a pair of large wool socks, I was definitely not going for sexy.

"I'm sorry about that." I said when she walked in, but stopped when I saw Harry sitting on the ground with an old textbook.

"Hogwarts a History?" He asked quietly.

"Something a friend from London gave me when I moved there." My quick tongue was not going to fail me now. Truth be told I was a little disappointed in his deductive skills. He used to be good at it…Aurors have to be. Maybe he had lost his touch.

"So Harry…what are you doing now?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well I heard that after Hogwarts you became an Auror. It's not common for an Auror to come across my path way out here in the French countryside."

"I suppose not." He stood up and walked over to the couch and took a seat facing me. His eyes didn't leave my face for a second, I blushed slightly. "Right now I'm taking some time off, coaching some Jr. Quidditch in my spare time. There are some things I'm trying to get explained before I go back to being an Auror."

"Such as?"

"I'm not sure…"

"Oh come on, what harm could it do?" I sat down at the other end of the couch from him and smiled. He groaned.

"Alright. Well…before I locked myself in a cave in Thailand, as you so eloquently put it, I was living in London with my partner, fantastic gal. Anyways, I went away for a little bit and she disappeared. Nobody could find her, so I tried to. That's why I was in Thailand, and China, and Russia and all over the world. I was unsuccessful. At this point it's presumed she's dead."

"Why would you presume that?" I ask a little shocked about the story, my story.

"She hasn't been in touch with anyone since then. That was almost 5 years ago." I didn't say anything. I turned my face to the fire but could feel his gaze still on me. He moved closer.

"Harry…"

"Helen, I'm sorry for before. Something came over me." He moved a little bit closer. "You just, remind me so much of someone." His leg was touching mine now. I felt his arm snake around my back but I held my gaze to the fire. He lifted a finger to my chin and brought my face to meet his. My eyes were brimming with fear and love and so many emotions I'm sure he was confused.

"Please try to understand…" He leaned in and kissed me again. This time I was not going to back away. I kissed him back as hard as I could, putting in all my love, all my emotions, everything I'd felt for him since we were schoolmates. His lips left mine and he pulled me tightly against his body.

"It's alright Hermione." My mouth dropped open for a second before I regained my composure. "You don't give me a lot of credit." He pulled away from me and looked me in the eyes, keeping his hands securely around my waist.

"But."

"But you suck at this acting game. I knew it was you the second I walked in that door. I decided to play your way because it was obvious you weren't ready to speak to me as you."

"That doesn't make any sense."

"Sure it does, it makes lots of sense. I hurt you very badly." He looked down now, obviously ashamed of his actions, as well he should be in my opinion. "I was a womanizer and didn't realize what was sitting there, right in front of my nose!"

"No kidding, fucker." He laughed and hugged me again. I sat there still in shock, replaying everything since he'd arrived.

"Am I really that bad of an actress?" I asked quietly. He laughed.

"You didn't used to be. I think you might have lost your touch."

A/N I KNOW this took forever. Please don't kill me. I don't have a ton of time right now with school, homework, two jobs and trying to have some sort of a social life (hence the shortness) the reason it took me so long is because I was at a loss for what to happy. I had a couple ideas and couldn't decide. So I finally did and I hope it's to your liking. I'm sorry guys, thanks a lot for reviewing and for loving this story. I post on here because I know how nice it is to read a truly great story. Again I apologize for the length – I'll try and make it longer next chapter. If you want anything particular to happen…let me know.

Kaccee