Dear Readers,

First of all, I just want to thank all of you who have travelled with me through this story, but, as things inevitably do, this fan fiction had to change. Due to the fact that I can no longer write for certain characters because of disinterest in them and also time restraints, I had to change the format of this story. Although I have many storylines I still want to explore, this will from now on be in a novel format and mainly Ryan and Marissa in a bubble. The other characters will still occasionally appear and affect storyline, but we will see everything mainly through Ryan and Marissa's eyes. I hope you all keep reading and that this won't push you away, but I know that people read my story for various reasons, and this change may erradicate some of those. To those of you who keep reading, thank you and I hope you enjoy!

Charlynn

The Private Celebration

It was late one Saturday afternoon in early May. Marissa was alone in the hotel room which had become Ryan's home for the past five months as he had been working for an architectural firm in San Francisco with an internship for his final credits to graduate from UCLA, and instead of finding him a temporary apartment, the firm had insisted he stay in a hotel. His life consisted of room service and continental breakfasts, a one room living space with only cable and wireless internet to distract him from his wandering thoughts, his longing thoughts, long, daily visits to the complementary gym, and the occasional dip in the hotel pool. His only true escapes from his loneliness were his nightly calls to Marissa and their constant messaging online. To make matters worse, because of their schedules and money restraints, it had been over a month since they had last seen each other.

Like Ryan, Marissa had continued to intern at Fox for credits towards graduation even after the show she and Summer had worked on was cancelled almost immediately. While Summer had been left jobless and fighting with the thousands of other hopeful actors in and around the Los Angeles area, Marissa had retained her position with the network and they had shifted her and put her on a developing team for another new show. This one, like the last, would debut in the fall, but it was smarter, chic, visually appealing; Marissa knew it would be a hit. However, despite the internship, she still had had to take a few courses that semester, but she had taken her last final the previous Friday before flying up to San Francisco to see Ryan.

No one understood why it was so necessary for her to see him that day. To everyone else but Marissa it had seemed like an extravagance, a crazy whim, especially when she had to juggle her work schedule in order to do it. While in San Francisco with Ryan, she would work during the day while he was at work and email and fax things back to the studio. Then, the next weekend, she would return with Ryan for graduation, his internship over, and then she would help him look for a full time job in the Los Angeles area in order to accommodate her job which would become full time after graduation. No one else, however, knew the secret they had kept for a year, and that secret was the very reason Marissa was there to surprise him.

Everything was ready; the room was set up. Curtains drawn, she had gone against hotel policy and had placed candles throughout the entire room, letting their gentle glow provide the only illumination in the room as they created the perfect ambiance for the night ahead. Sporadically around the room, she had placed flowers hand chosen for their aromatic beauty. Their meal had been ordered hours before and when they were ready….much later, if Marissa had her way, it would be brought up to them when she called and asked for it. Even she was ready.

The previous Christmas had been a hectic, confusing, painful one for many reasons, but for Ryan and Marissa, privately, it had been magical. Although Caitlyn did not come home, Jane, James Sr, and Jimmy had surprised her with a trip to the Caribbean for the holidays as a family, and she had sent Ryan a very special package in the mail before she left. She had kept the special piece of jewelry for months, unsure of how to give it back to Marissa or how to explain how she had worn it as her own for weeks. In the end though, she had decided that words were not necessary, that it would be enough for Marissa and Ryan just to have it back, so she had sent it to Ryan with just a simple apology for waiting so long.

In the middle of the chaos surrounding the Cohen family that holiday season, Ryan and Marissa had been able to escape into their own little world in the poolhouse, drawing the blinds to the outside drama and focusing upon each other and their love. Their worries about Hayley's health, deteriorating quicker than anyone had hoped with the added stress of all of Newport society knowing of the disease after Julie had made the public announcement at a Newport Group AIDS awareness benefit a month before, melted away. The secret fears they held in their heart for Summer, depressed and gone from all those who love her after she ran away a few days before the holidays to go in search of the Mother who had abandoned her in favor of starting a new family far away from the pressure and constraints of the Southern California community her first husband lived and worked in, that she would just be disappointed in her Mother all over again. They were even able to forget about their strained relationship with Seth, who, after feeling rejected by Summer had out of his confusion and desperation to feel cared for, had turned to Marissa and tried to kiss her the night before. There in the middle of the poolhouse as Ryan slid Marissa's rose necklace onto her slender, regal neck again, the necklace that meant so much to their relationship, everything fell into place for the lovers and all their fears, worries, and annoyance with the world and others slipped away to be replaced by bliss and contentment only the other could provide.

And now, here she was, lying across his bed, flower petals sprinkled across the surface with her, with only that very rose necklace adorning her golden, toned, desirable body, the epitome of perfection waiting for the man she loved to arrive home from work to surprise him. Hearing a key slide into the door, she couldn't help but let a smile erupt on her face, her eyes shimmering with the love and anticipation she felt for him.

The shock and awe over his face when he stepped into the room almost made Marissa giggle out loud. As his briefcase dropped to the floor, his mouth did the same before a wide, ecstatic grin took the replace of the surprise on his handsome face. His tie and jacket already off, cuffs unbuttoned and sleeves rolled up to his elbows, letting her glimpse the forearms she craved so much, his collar undone as well, revealing a peak of his chest, just enough to tease her, all of this combined made it impossible for Marissa to remain in her seductive pose as she sprang off the bed and practically ran into his arms, burying her face into his neck and inhaling his essence. As she felt his arms wrap securely around her, one dipping low on her waist to graze her bare derrière and the other wound around her shoulders so his hand could loosely curl itself in her long, now brunette, locks, she finally felt safe for the first time in over a month.

"Hey," she whispered softly in his ear, letting her lips punctuate her greeting with a gentle kiss on his neck.

He pulled back from her slightly, pulling his arms away from her body to cup her face in his hands and brought her mouth to his. Their lips met in a gentle, caring, protective embrace as if they were trying to express how much they had missed each other in a soft, delicate way before letting their desire for the other take them to levels of passion they had only been able to imagine or remember since the last time they had seen each other.

Eyes locked on the others, Ryan finally spoke up, his voice a low, husky plea of need and want. "Hey."

As they let their foreheads lean against the others, nose grazing softly in an intimate gesture, they both, simultaneously, let their minds go back to that fateful morning a year before.

She walked down to the beach, sand massaging her bare feet, the warmth soothing her, the sea air blowing her hair in every direction, tickling her face, neck, and shoulders, the dress Ryan had left behind for her to wear covering her excited and slightly nervous body. What was awaiting her at the end of her walk, she did not know, but she knew it was important, that it would be, perhaps, the most important, monumental day of her life. Today her life was changing forever; she could feel the electric anticipation in the air.

As soon as she saw Ryan, he approached her, taking her in his arms, mingling their lips together in a fiery, desperate kiss before whispering in her ear.

"I have a surprise for you," his loving voice rang out for only her to hear.

They walked down the beach, hand in hand, until they approached an area he had prepared for them. It was like their own personal oasis with no one in sight. A small table with two chairs sat to the side of a hammock and bed of pillows, a place where they could share a meal later whenever they were ready to break their intimate embraces and dine on the fresh, sea delicacies the chef prepared at the hotel daily. He even had brought sand toys to build sandcastles with. All in all, together, he had created for her their own little paradise.

She thought that had been it, that the beach oasis had been her surprise, but as they stood in the midst of the fairy land he had created, she suddenly saw someone walking towards them, dressed in a suit and carrying a book. He looked like a figure of authority, someone of importance, and as she turned back to Ryan, questions lining her delicate face, he pulled out a small, velvet box from his pocket and held it in his hand for her to take. Opening it slowly, the tears of joy already casting a gleam to her sapphire eye, she saw two unadorned, traditional gold wedding bands secured on two simplistic, gold chains. Looking up at Ryan, she knew, without a word shared between them what it meant, who the mystery man was, and why they were there that weekend.

"I thought we could wear them on the necklaces, close to our hearts," he explained, "at least until we decide that it's okay to tell others. I know that realistically this is not the best time to get married. We're still in school, our future is uncertain, and if the family found out about it we could hurt their feelings, but putting all that aside, us…together, as husband and wife, well," Ryan confessed, an adorable blush moving up his neck to turn his ears a bright red, "it just makes sense. I want this, I want you to be with me forever, and I think," he grinned at her sheepishly, "that you want the same thing."

Just as he finished expressing his love for her, the stranger approached them, speaking up almost immediately.

"Will there be a wedding today," he asked and then followed Ryan's gaze towards Marissa as they both waited for her answer.

Her voice filled the air, sure and decisive in its volume as she turned towards Ryan. "Yes," she answered both men, rejoining her hands with those of the man beside her, turning to fully face him, already ready to say her vows.

The ceremony was simple, non-religious, and solely about two people who were in love with each other. When the justice of the peace pronounced them man and wife, he slipped away soundlessly, leaving the newlyweds to enjoy their afternoon together, frolicking and making love on the beach long after the sun departed from the sky and the stars took over its vestige to watch over those below.

As both Ryan and Marissa let their memories fade back into their subconscious, they became fully aware of their present situation, she was naked in his arms, and it was exactly a year later after their wedding.

"Happy Anniversary," their voices melted together to form one harmonious melody as their bodies came together once again. Picking his wife up in his arms, Ryan carried her over to his bed, laying her down gently, letting his hands trail down her body as he stood back to watch her in awe. Although she blushed at his attention, she did not say a word, used to his loving gazes after being married to him for a year, and she returned the favor as she watched him desperately tear his own clothes off of his body.

Joining her on the bed, he pulled her into his arms, both of them lying side by side, staring intently into the others eyes while they let their hands explore, become reacquainted with their hungry bodies. It was sensual and delicious, caring yet greedy at the same time. As their passion increased, their mouths found their way to each other as their fingers continued to tantalize and tease the others body to the brink of no return, sending sensations up their spine that neither had felt in over a month.

Their need was voracious, and it did not take long for their foreplay to become painful. Reaching to his nightstand, Ryan went to grab a condom, but her gentle, soft voice stopped him immediately.

"I'm ready," Marissa whispered into his ear before pulling his hands back to her body, letting them rest on her breasts as she moved their hips closer together. "We're ready….to try again, for a baby," she continued, expanding her previous thought. Biting her lip, she looked down suddenly unsure of what she was saying, nervous around him after all this time, completely endearing her all over again in Ryan's heart.

"I'm ready, too," he assured her, leaning in and kissing her nose softly, making her giggle and look back up with tears in her eyes.

Changing their positions he moved on top of her, joining their bodies together soundlessly, feeling, once again, how perfect they fit with each other, as if their bodies were made to be united as one. As they made love, their skin glistening with the mingled gloss of their sweet sweat, celebrating their anniversary, Ryan and Marissa sealed their fate as a family forever.

Hours later as they lounged together on the bed, a dinner of their favorite foods spread out before them, naked bodies cuddled, keeping each other warm, they couldn't help but wonder if perhaps they had finally after months of pain and feeling unsure because of the drama surrounding their families, conceived the child they wanted so desperately.

Letting his hands fall to well below her belly button, Ryan caressed Marissa's lower abdomen, loving the feeling of her taunt, smooth skin against his fingers, savoring her nearness while he had her with him.

"What do you think," he asked her softly, his lips moving against her neck, nibbling tenderly, "do you think we made a baby tonight?"

Giggling, Marissa covered his hands with her own and let their fingers entwine, bringing them to her lips to gently kiss his hands before settling them back on her stomach and falling even deeper into his comforting arms. "I don't know," she said honestly, the sound of mischief evident in her tone, "but the night is still young, you know, so if we haven't yet, there are still many other opportunities to do so."

Ryan chuckled at her flirtatious manner before she continued talking, the seductive quality leaving her voice to be replaced by a reflective, whimsical one.

"Wouldn't it just be….poetic," she stopped speaking to look up at her husband and shoot him a warning glare to curb any jokes he might make about her word choice and was pleasantly surprised to see an interested, patient look on his face free of any mocking or sarcasm, "if we conceived our first child on our first anniversary?"

"I like the sound of that," he admitted while standing up and removing the food from the bed. While he worked, Marissa merely watched his body move, enjoying the vision he created for her. When he was finished, he crawled back into the bed with her and pulled the covers over them, positioning their bodies so that she was nestled into his, his arms wrapped around her holding her tightly.

"So, boy or girl," he quizzed her, bewildering Marissa at first. "And do not say the copout that all you want is a healthy child," he teased her, "like all women do. I know you have to have a preference. I do."

Twisting her head to look at him, her eyes wide with shock, she confronted him playfully. "You have a preference! How long have you been thinking about this?"

"Marissa," he teased her, "we've been discussing the idea of kids for well over a year now, and there was a time when we were trying before."

"That's true," she admitted thoughtfully before she turned her eyes back up at him with another question on her lips. "So, what is your preference?"

"If I answer this, you have to, too," he said giving her a condition.

Laughing, she sealed their bargain with a kiss. "Deal."

"Okay," he spoke hesitantly, letting his free hand that was not underneath her body softly caress her face, "I want a miniature you, a little girl with all your innocence, enthusiasm for life, and ability to love so that, in a way," he stopped speaking long enough for her to notice the blush he was unaware he sometimes had creep back onto his ears, "I can erase all the pain and suffering you went through as a little girl."

Leaning into him, her own hand found his face as she tenderly stroked his brow, joining their gazes together once again. "You already have erased all that pain from my life," she confided in him, the tears his confession had stirred in her eyes falling freely, "the day you told me you loved me, none of those memories could ever touch me again."

They stayed locked together like that for several minutes as the others declaration sifted into their hearts to make a permanent home and to create an everlasting memory of the moment. Breaking through the silence, Ryan leaned into Marissa, capturing her mouth in his and kissed her softly before resting his forehead against hers.

"I do believe you owe me your preference now," he said with a light tone, the meaning of the day too important to remain somber and quiet.

"You can't laugh," she chided.

"Hey, what do you take me for," he played with her. "If you didn't laugh at me, I won't laugh at you."

Smiling at him, she finally confessed. "Okay, so I really don't prefer if it is a boy or a girl, but," she continued when he went to protest, "I want him or her to have your eyes."

"My eyes," Ryan asked incredulously, "why my eyes? Yours are gorgeous."

"Thank you," she replied to his compliment after kissing his shoulder before answering his question, "but I want our baby to have your eyes because, to me, your eyes mean peace and comfort, and if our baby has your eyes, maybe that feeling will be….I don't know, somehow transferred to them, like a constant sense of protection."

"You don't have to worry about that," Ryan promised solemnly. "I will always keep you and our children safe, always."

Sliding her body out from underneath his arms, Marissa went to cloak his form with her own, letting their faces come within millimeters of each other, kissing his jaw line delicately.

"What are you doing," he quizzed her, a smile breaking onto his face.

"Making a baby," she cooed out, her voice soft and childlike in an adorable manner, completely driving him wild.

Laughing he let his hands roam up and down her back as she continued to kiss his face. "That's a good idea," he agreed with her. "We definitely need to take full advantage of the rest of the night and tomorrow afternoon before you have to go back."

"I don't have to go back," she laughed at his shocked expression. "I worked some things out with the studio. I'm yours for the week."

"Damn," he mockingly cursed. "I'm going to have to cancel with my mistress. We had plans for this week when my pesky wife was back in LA."

Playing along, Marissa got up out of the bed, leaving his body exposed and aroused. "Well, in that case," she teased, "let me get out of your hair now. I already got what I came here for."

Ryan sprang out of the bed and wrapped his arms around her, picking her up and making he squeal giddily as he carried her back to the bed. "And what's that? What did you get out of me?"

With hope shining in her eyes, she let him put her back in the bed, blanketing her body with her own and joining their hands together. "A baby."