Questioned of Self

Chapter 5: Lucifer Knows the Truth

"Did the day give you time to rethink your answer?" Lucifer got up from his sitting place.

"Yes. It wasn't easy but I think you will be satisfied with my analysis."

"Perfect. Well then, begin: who was Kira?" He folded his arms and listened inattentively. Setsuna stared into the fountain's water, searching for words to float by to begin his sentence.

"Kira was a mystery ad secretive. After living so many life times he was a wise one too. You can picture him in a 100 year old grandfather in an 18 year old's body. He was gentle and patient; perfect listener and teacher to all. Other then Sara he was my guardian angel. He sacrificed for much his friends' well being and because of that people respected him. I never remember a time when he didn't lose his cool; he always waltzed through life with a charming smile he hid. To others he was distant and sometimes cold. There's a lot that I don't know about. You can tell by looking in his eyes there were volumes full of sadness and grief."

"Sadness, grief?" Lucifer repeated.

"He may have loved Alexial just as he may have hated her but I know he loved me as a brother..." Setsuna could feel his throat dry and stretch as tears welled up in his eyes. "He was a good guy. He meant a lot to me, and now he's dead." Setsuna wiped the tears from his eyes and looked at Lucifer. His face was turned away from him so he couldn't see the angel's expression.

"It was a mistake that I came here." Setsuna couldn't' understand what Lucifer meant by that. "It's only brought the pain on more."

"What pain? Is Kira's body hurting you?" Setsuna asked.

"Intensely…I keep on feeling this ache in my chest but I don't understand where and why it comes and goes. I…I thought knowing who he was would make it go away." Setsuna rounded the fountain slowly to see Lucifer's face. When he peered into the eyes of the damned angel he was taken back.

That face couldn't have been Lucifer's. Those miserable eyes that looked up to him so, his pouting lips that seem so heartbreaking along with a heavy stare which could move a person to tears. Only Kira could possess such a face, but Kira was dead. It's only rational that this was Lucifer's looking at Setsuna from below on the ground.

"Do you know why I hurt?" Lucifer whispered. Setsuna shook his head.

"No. I cannot feel what you're feeling. You must know."

"But I told you I can't!" He shut his eyes in pain. "I thought knowing who he was could lead me to knowing how to stop it."

"Is this Kira's pain you are feeling or your own?" Setsuna asked with worry. Lucifer was at a loss.

"I don't know. How can I tell?" He looked up at Setsuna as if he was a small boy. Patience ran out and Lucifer decided for Setsuna. He fell into Setsuna and buried his head in his embrace. Sheltered and protected, he wrapped his arms around the mortal boy and found sanctuary. During all this Setsuna gasped and couldn't calculate why Lucifer was acting like this. Could he really be at a loss with all these emotions? Whatever the case, Setsuna didn't mind at all. He held the angel with a gentle affection and breathed in his heavenly scent.

Lucifer closed his eyes while savoring this comforting moment in such warm arms. He tightened his grip so that the moment wouldn't slip through his hands. Tears formed behind Setsuna's eyes until they broke their barrier and fell down his cheek. He kept on singing in his head that his was not Kira, this was not Kira. But lying to himself seemed so right.

"Your safe now Kira." He whispered gently as he stroked his black hair. It seemed that a giant blanket of sadness released Setsuna from despair and as he breathed in he could finally once again smell the world as wonderful as it was. Lying with Kira came so natural to Setsuna and he fell asleep with the body cradling beneath him.

The next morning Setsuna felt a cricket hop off his face, waking him up. His eyes burned when they saw the brightness of the new born day. As his body ached while getting up, his min rewound itself of the previous night. Kira was in my arms! Where's Kira? Where did he go? But then reality came back to his mind?

Kira's dead. Lucifer lives and it was Lucifer that I fell asleep with last night. But it wasn't nearly as bad as it sounds. I hope he finds the release he was looking for.

That was a pretty chapter. So Lucifer does have feelings! But will he accept them? As servitude to be too much for the ambitious angel, Lucifer makes it a regular routine to see Setsuna. What will become of this?