Feel like I need to warn you that in 3 chapters time the story takes a bit of a dark turn. There will be trigger warnings at the beginning of the chapter(s), but I want to give you a heads up so that you're not blindsided by it after all this light and fluffy stuff.

But I also promise that there is light and beauty just beyond the darkness.

Stick with me x

Chapter 33 - Sweet

Out as usual tending to the animals, Carl and Tahlia were nearly done and were just tipping the last of the scraps into the pig trough.

"I love these piglets." Tahlia said as she leaned over the pig enclosure. "I promise I'm never gonna eat you guys. Even if you smell super delicious on a plate."

Carl snorted at that, then also turned to address the pigs. "I'm not promising anything."

Tahlia fixed Carl with a reproachful look as she shook her head, then broke into a grin and gave him a nudge.

"Hey. Update me on the Elise situation."

He shrugged. "There's nothing to update. She's just a friend."

"But I thought you were kinda into her?"

Carl sighed. "Yeah. Maybe I am. Was. A little. But, it doesn't matter because she's in love with someone else."

"Oh no! Buddy, that sucks!" exclaimed Tahlia, then she thought for a moment about the lack of teenage boys around, and a puzzled look settled on her face. "Wait, who with?"

Carl looked up at her gloomily. "Daryl."

It took a second for Tahlia to register that and she raised her brows. "Oh. Shit. Really?"

"Yeah. Goes on about him all the time. Gets all jealous of you."

"Me?!"

"Coz you get to go on his bike. And you guys are always out there together. She reckons that... that you two just go out there to... you know." he said awkwardly, then narrowed his eyes curiously. "Do you?"

Tahlia laughed. "No. We don't. We're just friends too."

"Oh. Ok." He thought for a moment more. "You should hear her and Irina when they get together. Can't shut them up about him. Always going on about how 'he's so hot, so dreamy'." he said that last bit in a mocking falsetto, then looked at Tahlia again. "Is he?" he asked her hesitantly. "Is that... what girls like?"

Tahlia sucked in a slow breath and considered her answer carefully. "You know, the beautiful thing about people is that we're all so different and all have very different tastes. There really is someone for everyone. Someones. And it's one thing to look at a person and say they're hot, and another thing entirely to get to know them and really like them, love them, for who they are. So yeah, maybe Daryl is it for some girls, but you will also be it for plenty of other girls – or boys -" she added quickly, not wanting to make assumptions, "-and don't doubt for a second the fact that you are totally gorgeous."

She tucked an arm around his shoulders and gave him a squeeze.

Carl blushed, but looked pleased at her comment, then the rumble of an engine had them both glancing up at Daryl pulling up on the Triumph.

"Hey! Pain in the ass! Come get on the damn bike, let's go!" he shouted across the garden.

Carl let out a little sigh. "He is pretty badass though."

Tahlia tipped Carl's hat up a little, and dropped her face level to his. "Don't underestimate the power of a good-ass. Play to your strengths and you'll have them flocking to you." With a little tap on his cheek, she jogged over to Daryl, leaving Carl glowing.

They had barely dismounted from the bike when Daryl spoke up.

"Here."

Tahlia turned around, wondering what he was talking about, then saw the pen held out to her, along with a clean forearm. She grinned, and he tried not to flush, rolling his eyes instead. He wasn't sure why he wanted to know the rest of The Highwayman, but maybe it had something to do with the way her face had lit up when she'd first told him about it. And maybe a little to do with finding out what this grand notion of love that she dreamed of was like.

"Just gimme the next bit."

"Ain't into love stories! Ain't into poetry!" she mocked, imitating his drawl, and he aimed a swift kick at her ass.

Laughing, she motioned for him to sit against a nearby tree. "Wondered why you were so keen to get out here today!"

They took up their stance from the previous day, Tahlia's back snuggled in against Daryl's chest as she curled his arm around her, pen to skin for the second verse of the poem.

Firstly, he told himself that he'd forgotten it would mean her sitting against him like this. Then, he assured himself he was only letting this happen because it was good practice for keeping his shit under control when she was this close to him. Lastly, he accused himself of being a damn liar.

When she was done, he lifted his arm and quickly scanned what she'd written.

"That it?!" he remarked, annoyed. "That ain't enough! What happens next?"

Tahlia arched a brow at him as she made to stand up. "One verse a day. That's all that fits on your arm."

"Got two arms!" he said, as he dragged her back down.

She laughed as she pulled his other arm in front of her. "Alright, I'll give you another."

"How many verses are there?" he asked as she wrote.

Pausing, she muttered to herself as she counted, then said, "Seventeen."

"Seventeen?!" he cried out as he snatched his arm away. "Ain't waitin' that damn long! Just tell me all of it now."

"Patience, grasshopper."

"Tahly! This is stupid! Just tell me the whole lot and be done with it!"

"No." she refused, leaning her head back on his chest and gazing up at him, a twinkle in her eyes.

He surveyed her for a long moment, then looped one arm around her chest and leaned his head towards hers conspiratorially.

"Take ya straight to the foxes if ya do. Get a couple squirrels for 'em on the way too."

Tahlia gasped. "Bribery!"

Daryl released her and leaned back against the tree. "And ain't gonna take ya back there 'gain if ya don't." he said loftily.

"You monster!" she exclaimed dramatically, but that was enough to do it, so she scooted away from him and flopped onto her back on the ground at his feet, folding her hands across her stomach.

"Ok. Get comfortable. It's a long one."

"Start from the beginnin'." he instructed quietly, tucking his arms around his bent knees and gazing down at her while she kept her eyes on the sky above.

So, she did.

In a voice low and smooth and mystical, she recited the whole poem for him.

Whether it was the beautiful way she spoke, the open, dreamy look on her face, the stray tears that slipped from the corner of her eyes as she channeled her mother's passion, or the story itself, he was sucked right in and unable to look away.

"Wait, what?!" exclaimed Daryl when she was finished. "She killed herself to warn him not to come?"

Tahlia nodded. "She loved him so much she was willing to take her own life in the hope of keeping him safe."

"And then he went back and got himself killed anyway coz he found out 'bout her?!" Daryl felt more shaken that he should have at that.

"Yeah." Tahlia said softly. "Isn't it beautiful? That's true love. Love so big, so strong that they sacrificed themselves for each other without hesitation."

"Naw, it's just stupid!" Daryl jumped to his feet and kicked at a fallen branch. "Stupidest fuckin' thing I ever heard!" he flared as he stalked off into the trees.

From her prone position in the grass, Tahlia just rolled her eyes.

Typical response from Daryl. Big feelings that culminate in anger.

She tucked her hands behind her head and waited patiently for him to return.

"Why ya still lyin' there like walker bait?!" he snapped accusingly when he eventually reappeared, standing over her.

"Waiting for you to finish having a tantrum." she teased, and he gave her a hard nudge with his foot, unsure why he'd felt so affected by that poem.

Then, he heaved a sigh and held out a hand to pull her up.

"Didn't mean it. Sayin' it was stupid. Know it means a lot to ya. So, like that ya shared it." he muttered, not meeting her eyes, but also not letting go of her hand.

Tahlia nodded. "You're welcome!" she said brightly. "Got plenty more I can share with you if you like?"

"Naw!" he said immediately, dropping her hand now. "No more damn poetry. C'mon. Owe y'a couple of squirrels."

They started off through the trees, and he gazed down at her. "Gotta admit that poem is kinda stupid though, right? They're dumb and reckless." Then his brows shot up. "Kinda like you!"

She laughed and elbowed him, then tipped her head back and heaved a wistful sigh. "No, you've gotta admit it's kind of beautiful! That engulfing, breathless, crushing love, the kind that you live and die for."

He would never admit that.

Instead, even though he couldn't tell if she was serious or not, he threw his arm around her shoulders and squeezed her against him.

"You're just a damn dreamer, ain't ya girl? A dumb, reckless, hopeful, romantic dreamer." And he said it with such affection that she smiled and smiled and squeezed him back.

"Yeah I am." sighed Tahlia. "That's all it is though, dreaming."

"Huh?"

"The love thing. Has only and will only ever be a dream."

"What? Y'ain't never been in love before?" The question just popped out. Daryl didn't even want to know the answer to that. Felt like it was probably going to hurt.

Tahlia shook her head. "Nope."

Not the answer he'd expected.

He scoffed. "Don't believe that. You and your 'people person' shit – has 'em comin' to ya like moths to a flame. Musta had plenty of guys trippin' over themselves for ya."

"I mean, I've had my fair share of boyfriends, I guess."

Ouch. Daryl bristled.

"But love... I mean, it's something that I want – I am a total romantic – but I just can't. In the past whenever it felt things were going that way, I just get to a point where I freak out and run for the hills. Like I go into things with my heart wide open then it just snaps shut and I'm done, it's over."

"Why?" Daryl couldn't understand that, and it didn't reconcile with the heart on her sleeve, open girl that he knew.

"You know." she muttered, shrugging.

"I don't." He caught her arm and stopped her.

Looking embarrassed, Tahlia squirmed a little, then dropped her eyes to the ground.

"Ugh, I know it's stupid... but I think maybe coz the two people who were meant to love me more than anyone in the world, and whom I loved unconditionally, ended up not even being able to stand the sight of me. So, I love the idea of being in love, but when it comes down to it, I can't put myself on the line to be rejected like that again. It's too scary. So I run. Can't help it. Happens every time."

"Giiiiiiirl." Daryl said sadly, reaching down to grab hold of her wrists, always surprised at how far he could wrap his big hands around her. Slowly he raised her hands and laid them against his chest, laying his own firmly over top.

She looked up at him, surprised at the gesture and the warmth and the strength of his heart beating steadily beneath.

"Can't shut yourself down coz of your damn parents. Fuck do parents know anyways? They ain't never perfect, get it wrong all the time. Look at mine. Weren't a potful of love floatin' round in my whole damn house. Can't let what happened with yours keep ya from lettin' out all that love inside ya, from gettin' all that love ya deserve."

Sometimes he came out with the most unexpectedly beautiful comments that Tahlia just wanted to cry. And kiss him. But neither of those things were appropriate, so she deflected.

"Have you been in love, then?" she asked mildly, and Daryl instantly coloured.

"Well... naw... s'different though."

"You know you deserve all that too, right? More than anyone." she told him softly, and he dropped her hands, quickly turning to keep walking.

She sighed. Another thing about himself that he didn't believe. But this felt like one to just let go of for the time being.

"Ugh, who needs love anyway! It doesn't last forever." she declared blithely as she followed after him. "Even happily ever afters have to come to an end sometime, right?"

He stopped suddenly then slowly turned to face her, a slightly wounded expression on his face, his voice low and serious. "Don't do that."

"Do what?" she asked, surprised.

"Be all cynical. That ain't you. You're all rainbows and fuckin' unicorns."

"I am?!" replied Tahlia, with a laugh.

"Yeah." he said softly. "So stay in ya damn lane." Then, almost as an afterthought, he ran his thumb down the inside of her left bicep. "Permanently hopeful. Doncha dare lose that, girl."

Silence stretched comfortably between them as they trekked on to the den, but as they neared, Daryl's skin prickled, and he slowed his pace knowing that something was off. Then a fetid smell carried down towards them on the wind, followed by that telltale rasping and groaning, and they both stiffened as they peered through the trees.

"Goddammit!" cursed Daryl, as they saw two bloody-faced walkers tearing the fox babies to pieces, the vixen howling and snapping at them, one of which soon turned to her and ripped her belly open, spilling her insides to the grass.

Raising his crossbow, Daryl fired two bolts in quick succession, putting the bloodthirsty corpses down. At his side, Tahlia stood stock still, her fingers pressed to her lips, silent tears spilling down her cheeks, Daryl's heart cracking a little at the sight.

"Wait here. Don't look." he instructed firmly.

The vixen was struggling weakly as she lay on her side panting, her intestines stringing from her torn belly. Unable to look away, Tahlia watched as Daryl quickly strode over to the dying fox and sank to his knees next to her. Gently he stroked her head and murmured something to her before standing up and quickly firing a bolt into her head, killing her instantly. He was surprised at the tug of sorrow in his chest he felt for her and the babies and kicked angrily at the nearest walker body on his way back to Tahlia. She had her arms folded across her chest, an anguished look shining in her green eyes.

"Aww, shit Tahls, I'm so sorry."

He dropped his crossbow and quickly scooped her into his arms. Burying her face into his chest, her shoulders shook under his embrace, and he just held her tighter, leaning his cheek against her head. Eventually he felt her take a big breath, and slowly she pulled back from him. Swiping his thumbs across her cheeks, he gazed at her, genuinely upset too.

"Y'ok?" he asked gently.

She gave a small nod. "I'm sorry. Sorry I'm such an idiot about all this. You were right, of course you were right, and I didn't listen."

"S'alright, Tahly. Ya can't help it, it's just you and your big heart and big hope. Ya damn big softie. And ya turnin' me into one too. C'mon."

He looped his arm around her shoulders to lead her away, and she leaned into him.

"Maybe I shouldn't have left any food out for them. Maybe that's what drew the walkers. Or maybe if we got here sooner we could have-"

"Uh-uh. Can't think like that. Played out the way it played out, girl. Drive ya'self 'round the bend if ya keep thinkin' of what mighta been. If this, if that. Fuckin' walkers."

Leading her far from the scene, they came across a brook, and Daryl dropped his pack to the ground.

"Here, let's stop for a bit. Ya want somethin' to eat?"

Tahlia shook her head, but took a drink from the bottle he passed to her.

"C'mere, girl."

Obediently, she sat next to him and began tossing twigs into the water as he took her other arm and started to draw.

"Ya love animals. So can't be easy for ya out here with me huntin'. Why d'ya keep comin' out?" he asked, concentrating on his pen strokes.

Staring into the water, Tahlia shrugged one shoulder, keeping the one he was drawing on still. "I just like being with you."

His pen strokes slowed as he snuck a glance up her face – was there something more in that? She had a faraway look in her eye and her expression wasn't giving much away. Surely there was nothing more in that – anyway, it wasn't like her to drop hints, she'd just make a damn announcement if there was something she wanted to say. He was reading too much into that for sure.

"And it's not so bad if I don't have to do the hunting." she added lightly. "As long as I can just leave all the dirty work to you."

Daryl chuckled at that. "Fine by me." He shifted a little closer to her. "So... ya musta had pets growin' up then?" Because he had his hand tucked under her arm, against her ribcage, he felt her breath hitch at the question, and realised that he'd just touched a nerve. "Ya don't have to -"

"Yeah." she cut him off, then gave a little sigh as she dropped her gaze to the ground and started pulling up blades of grass. "Yeah, I had pets. Me and Charlotte got a dog each from the same litter when we were 4. Mac and Cheese. English Springer Spaniels named after our favourite food. Hers was Cheese, she was cheese mad. Would take bites straight out of the block. Anyway." She shook her head to get herself back on track. "Those dogs were awesome, we played with them all the time, took them everywhere we went. Not long after momma died, our front gate was left open. Maybe by me, maybe by daddy, maybe by someone else. None of us could remember. Cheese ran out onto the road and got hit by a car. She was pretty badly injured and we had to take her to the vet to get her put down. Then after that, daddy had Mac rehomed. Said he couldn't take any more deaths in the family."

"What?!" Daryl stopped drawing, shocked. "Your daddy gave your dog away?! When you'd just lost everyone else?!"

Tahlia nodded, her eyes on her hands now as she picked at her nails. "I got it, you know, it was really traumatic seeing Cheese so hurt then having to put her down. He just didn't want to risk having to go through all that again, so-"

"Naw, that's just a copout." Daryl said bluntly. "That dog was the only thing ya had left, and ya daddy took that away from ya. That's bullshit!"

"Well, I mean, looking back, he was going through a lot and wasn't handling it well at all. I was just a kid, so I didn't fully understand what he was going through, and-"

"Naw, Tahly! Stop makin' excuses for him. You went through all the same as him, and instead of pullin' ya close and lovin' ya and keepin' ya safe like a daddy's meant to do, he sent your dog away then did the same thing to you! He ain't done right by ya, not one bit!"

That all came out fiercer than Daryl intended, but he couldn't help it. After hearing about Tahlia's fear of love and rejection because of her parents, then finding out that her dad got rid of her damned dog when she needed it the most, he was seriously riled up at her father, glad as hell that he would never cross paths with the guy.

Tahlia sighed. "Lots of people have crappy parents and shitty lots in life, mine was hardly bad, all things considered. He was really depressed, I can see that now. Sure, he could have done things different, but he did what he thought he had to do at the time." She frowned at Daryl. "Not like your daddy was winning any Father of the Year awards either."

"Yeah, but least I know it!" Daryl jumped to his feet irritably. "Ain't under no illusion that my daddy was anything but an asshole, while you sit here makin' excuses for yours, pretendin' that after all that crap he pulled he was still deservin' of a girl like you! And here y'are 20 years later still draggin' it all 'round, scared of love coz of your parents; tryna be buddies with everyone just to prove to ya'self that people still like ya even though your daddy didn't. You spread yourself 'round other people so much that sometimes there ain't barely nothin' left of ya for yourself! He was a selfish asshole, Tahly, and ya don't need to prove shit for him. And sooner y'admit that, sooner you can stop carin' 'bout what other people think so much and start livin' life just for you!"

His voice had risen along with his outrage, and he was breathing heavily by the end of that rant, standing over a stunned Tahlia who sat motionless in the grass. Not sure where to go from there, Daryl spun around and stalked off into the cover of the trees.

Daryl's outburst had taken Tahlia completely by surprise, and for a few long moments she just sat staring at the trees he'd disappeared into. She wondered why he always got so touchy when she talked about her dad, her parents, her childhood, when his own experiences had been so much worse. The things he'd said hadn't surprised her though, she'd heard all that before. Dr. Goode had spent a lot of time trying to work through her daddy issues and point out all the things she did that were a direct result of his rejection. She was actually impressed by the fact that Daryl had been right on the money. Again. And had summarised it in less than 30 seconds. Damn, he was so perceptive. She wished she'd met him way back then and not wasted so much time with her useless therapist.

Just remembering that he had been drawing on her, she glanced down at her arm, and gave a sad chuckle. He'd been drawing foxes – he'd made it through two and a half of them before losing focus.

Daryl felt terrible for what he'd said, for having a go at her. Already primed from an intense emotional morning, it hadn't been a far leap for him to rise to anger just now. But it shouldn't have been directed at her. His temper had disappeared just as quickly as it had flared, and now he just felt guilty. She didn't need him, of all people, to attack her character, but sometimes his fierce desire to go to bat for her came out as very misdirected anger.

Her openness, friendliness, hopefulness were the things that he had grown to love the most about her because it set her so far apart from anyone he'd ever met, and he marveled at the way that she could always see the good in things, so opposite to his own view of the world. He just wanted to protect those qualities of hers, wanted to protect her so fiercely that the thought of anything bad happening to her, however small, was enough send him into a tailspin.

It took a while before he could bring himself to go back, and even then he wasn't sure of what he would say.

Hell, he wasn't sure she'd even still be there waiting for him after that.

Shit. That thought got him moving. What if she'd disappeared again?

When he arrived back through the trees, Tahlia was packing their things away, getting ready to leave. She stopped what she was doing when she saw him and just stood and watched him with a neutral expression as he walked nervously towards her. Awkwardly, he kicked at the dirt, unable to meet her eyes yet.

"That better be the last time you storm away from me today, Dixon." she scolded, placing her hands on her hips.

Daryl let out a tiny sigh and squeezed his eyes shut for a brief moment. She wasn't mad. He took another step closer and chanced a glance up at her.

"Tahly..." he mumbled. "M'sorry. I didn't mean..."

"It's ok, it's ok. You were right. You're always goddamned right."

He shook his head as his hands worried one another. "Ain't never right to speak to ya like that. Say all that shit. Ain't never you I'm mad at, just comes out that way and... m'sorry."

She pushed her hair back from her face and studied him for a second. "I don't understand why you get so worked up by some of the stuff I tell you. My life has been a breeze compared to yours. You've been through so damn much and had it so rough, but I tell you about my daddy giving my dog away and you fly off the handle?" She gave a little incredulous huff. "Why?"

Daryl flushed a little. It sounded pretty stupid when she put it like that. For a second he thought that she might be teasing him, but when he looked at her, he saw that her question was deadly serious. She really wanted to understand.

He shrugged. "Dunno. Just hate that shit stuff happened to ya."

"Shit stuff happens to everyone." she replied gently.

"Yeah, but..." he jammed his hands in his pockets and focused on her boot laces. "...but look at how I turned out-"

"-incredible-" she interrupted.

Daryl rolled his eyes before carrying on. "Look at most people. Then look at you. Maybe if you were a real hard-ass or a fuckin' jerk then all that stuff wouldn't bother me so much. But you ain't, Tahly."

Slowly he fixed his gaze on hers, and she could see an ember of anguish smoldering in the blue, wrenching her heart in her chest, making her want to cry, making her want to lighten the conversation before she actually did.

Daryl continued, "'Spite all that stuff ya been through, you're still the... the nicest, sunniest damn girl I ever met, and-"

"You forgot 'pain in the ass'."

"Trust me." Daryl said flatly as he stared at her. "I ain't never gonna forget that. Now would ya shut up? Don't ask me damn questions if you ain't even gonna be quiet long enough to hear the answer."

Tahlia struggled to keep the smile from her lips now, but there was nothing she could do about the amusement shining in her eyes. "I'm listening." she almost managed evenly.

"Naw. Ain't sayin' nothin' more now." he said petulantly, frowning at her.

"Ok." Tahlia lost the battle with her smile as she moved to close the gap between them. "You don't even need to. I'll talk."

"Nothin' new there, then." Daryl muttered. "And don't even think 'bout huggin' me."

"I'm always thinking about that." she laughed as she tugged his hands out of his pockets. "You, Dixon-" she kissed the knuckles of one hand, "-are the sweetest fucking guy-" the other hand, "-I've ever met, even though you'd deny it 'til the world ends, and even though you pretend to be grouchy with me most of the time."

"That ain't pretend." he grumbled, his knuckles still tingling from the touch of her lips, but she already had her arms around his neck by then, and he sighed as he pulled her close and wondered why it always felt so damned right when she was in his arms. "Anyway. Ya don't even know what I was gonna say."

"I know it would've been something sweet." she replied into his shoulder.

"Stop callin' me goddamn sweet!" he objected, attempting to keep his tone stern. He was silent for a couple of breaths, then he moved his mouth closer to her ear and said lowly, "Ya got me now, girl. Gonna look out for ya. Keep shit stuff from happenin' to y'ever again."

He felt her sharp exhale of amazement just as much as he heard it as she tightened her arms around him.

"See?" she exclaimed in delight. "What did I goddamn tell you? You are so-"

"Just you try sayin' it one more fuckin' time." Daryl warned, as he slid his hands, which were already wrapped right around her, high up under her arms and started to tickle her.

Tahlia squealed instead and tried to extricate herself from him, but he kept his arms firmly around her, his fingers still running up and down her sides.

"Whatchu gonna say, girl? I'm so what?"

"You're... you're so..." she gasped, squirming and giggling. "You're so mean! A mean, nasty sonofabitch!"

"Yeah. That's more like it." he chuckled and released her, grinning down at her as she shook her head at him.

They held each other's gaze for a moment, then with a flick of her brows, Tahlia mouthed 'sweet', and Daryl gave a playful growl, chucking one arm around her shoulders and pulling her into him again for a brief second as he dropped a quick kiss on the top of her head.

"Hey." he said, serious now, leaving his arm around her. "Y'all good? After everythin' today?"

"Yeah." replied Tahlia truthfully, because he made everything ok. Then she gave him a wry smile. "But, Daryl? I think you might need to find me some more animals."

"Girl, I'd find anythin' in the whole damn world for ya. C'mon, let's go."

As they headed back to the bike, Daryl realised that the happenings of the day had afforded him some perspective on everything that had been storming inside him. When it came down to it, all that mattered to him was her.

Keeping her safe, shielded, happy.

What he felt, what he wanted, none of that mattered. Not really. That was all just background noise.

And with that realisation, the storm calmed a little. Everything seemed easier after that.

I apologise for all the traumatic animal deaths!