Chapter 65 - The wheels on the bus

"A horde?!"

In an instant, Rick was running for the ladder and climbing onto the roof to see for himself. Sure enough, through the gaps in the trees he could make out the mass of undead bodies lurching through the woods and he was shocked to see how close they were - the first of the horde only minutes away, the bulk of it an uncomfortably short distance behind. And only then he realised that the wind was carrying their rasping noise in the other direction, which was why they hadn't heard them sooner.

"Shall we reinforce the windows and doors?" called Maggie from the ground, lifting a hand to shield her eyes.

Rick puffed out a sharp breath before shaking his head decisively. "They're too close! There's no time for that and there's too many of them! They'll breach this place. We've got to leave!"

"Leave?" repeated Carol, two empty water containers dangling at her side.

"Leave!" Rick yelled, already halfway down the ladder. "Is everyone here? Is everyone back?"

Maggie glanced around, then her hand flew to her mouth. "Beth! Beth's not here, she went for a walk a little while ago…" She suddenly shot her gaze to Rick's, apologetically. "…with Carl and Judith."

Rick's eyes widened in panic. "Glenn! Can you spot them from up there?!"

"Trying to!" Glenn called back, making his way around the rooftop.

"Which way?! Which way did they go?"

Maggie shrugged helplessly, but Carol pointed straight ahead, in the direction of the horde. "There's really only that one clear path into the woods. I don't think they would've gone off the path or gone too far if they had Judith with them."

Rick cursed loudly and then three walkers stumbled out of the trees, Rosita and Abraham immediately raising their guns and taking them down.

"The first of them are already here!" cried Rick. "Right. Daryl! Get that bus started and take it out onto the road! Glenn! Stay up there for now and be our eyes!"

"I'll go help him." said Sasha, jogging for the ladder.

"We'll head out onto the road, keep it clear." declared Abraham, and then he and Rosita were on their way.

Rick gave a brusque nod. "I'm going to find Carl. Get ready to go!"

Michonne was hot on his tail as he ran down the path. "I'm coming with you."

Heading for the bus, Daryl pointed at Eugene who was still holding the bloodied cloth to his nose.

"You. Come with me and get your ass on the bus." Then he glanced at the others. "Grab what ya need and head for the bus soon as I get it onto the road! No fuckin' around!"

Tahlia was certain that last comment was directed at her, and she stifled a giggle as she headed back inside.

"Ok! What do we need?" She shouldered her katana and grabbed a couple of packs belonging to the others that were lying at the far side of the church, then she spotted Gabriel on his knees in front of the altar.

"Gabriel! There's a horde coming! We've got to go!"

He ignored her and kept his head bowed in prayer.

Carol came running in. "No time to fill the water containers. What have we got left?" Her eyes alighted on one and a half filled containers at the door. "This it?" she muttered to herself. "It'll have to do." Then she flicked her attention up. "Tahlia! Grab those candles and matches!"

"Gabriel!" Tahlia shouted again as she reached under a pew for the small cuddly bear from the church toybox that Judith had claimed as her own. "Come on!"

Up on the roof, Sasha pointed to the road.

"Shit! They're spreading out!"

The horde was concentrated in the thick of the trees, but were slowly spreading out as they advanced. There was only one drivable road away from the church to the left of the woods, and if the walkers kept spreading, they'd soon end up blocking the road and safe exit.

"How can we stop them?"

Glenn glanced around. "The bell!" he said suddenly. "We need to ring the bell!"

Sasha looked at him like he was insane.

"They'll be drawn to the noise and cluster up again! We need to give them something to head for!" He spotted Tyreese just emerging from the church below. "Ty! Go back inside and ring that bell!"

After three failed attempts to start the bus, Daryl exhaled in relief at the welcome sound of the engine sputtering to life.

"Fourth time lucky." Eugene commented from a seat halfway down, his nose still stuffy with dried blood. "Hardly conventional given that the number three is widely hailed as the charm, but-" He quickly clamped his mouth shut at the dark look Daryl threw over his shoulder.

"Ain't the time for that shit, man."

Driving the rickety bus past the church and out onto the road, Daryl beeped the horn impatiently before hanging out the door and hollering for everyone to get their damn asses on the damn bus.

Now Tara was at Gabriel's side. "Get up!"

He barely glanced at her in acknowledgement. "No. I can't leave. This is my home."

"You have to! You're dead if you stay here!"

"I'll pray." he told her, even though his voice was shaking with fear. "I can't leave my church."

Tara grabbed his arm. "Get your butt up and do something for once! We're leaving!"

Gabriel opened his mouth to protest but was cut off by the sudden rusty clang of the church bell, and before he could stop her, Tara had dragged him to his feet and propelled him to the front door.

Out in the woods, it wasn't hard for Rick and Michonne to figure out which direction to head in because they could hear Judith wailing like a banshee. His heart in his mouth, Rick pushed on and refused to let himself imagine the possible scenarios of what they might find. They soon spotted Beth, clutching a distraught Judith to her chest as Carl bravely fought off a handful off walkers that had closed in on them.

"Carl!" yelled Rick as he raised his gun, firing at two of the undead advancing on his son. "This way!"

Michonne shot down three more and shouted for Beth to run, covering her as she stumbled through the trees. When Beth and Carl were safely behind them, Rick and Michonne took down a few more of the nearest walkers before turning on their heel and shepherding the others back towards the sound of the church bell.

"Glenn says it got their attention, but it's not enough!" Maggie told Tahlia worriedly as Carol approached and grabbed everything from Tahlia's arms and ran it to the bus. "What else can we do?"

"Fire's usually good." replied Tahlia. "That's my motto. If in trouble, light a fire!"

Tara laughed. "There are so many things wrong with that sentence."

But Maggie nodded seriously. "Let's do it. Glenn! Sasha! Get down from there now!"

Then they started dragging the pile of wood they'd cut up the previous day, and anything else that was flammable nearby, and piled it up just inside the church entrance.

"I've got a can of gas here." Tyreese offered. "Won't we need it for the bus, though?"

"Won't be no need for it if we can't get out of here." replied Maggie gravely.

Hesitating for only a second, Tyreese then started sloshing the fuel messily around the pile and beyond.

"Stop!" shrieked Gabriel, horrified. "You can't do that! You can't set this church on fire! This is a house of God!"

"House of God?" scoffed Maggie. "It's just four walls and a roof. Get him out of here."

Tara and Tyreese each caught one of Gabriel's arms and marched him to the bus, while Maggie nodded at Tahlia with a wry smile.

"Go for it, firebug."

With a grin, Tahlia whipped the box of matches from the altar out of her back pocket and struck one, the little orange flame whooshing to life in her hand.

"Glenn and Sash down?"

"We're here!" called Glenn as he jogged past, reaching a hand out for Maggie. "Let's go!"

Tahlia threw her match at the gassed-up pile of wood, a little flame of satisfaction catching inside her at the same time. Then she struck and tossed another two matches in, just to be sure.

Waiting for her at the bus door, Daryl threw a pointed look at the steadily rising church fire, then a disapproving one at Tahlia - which quickly turned into an affectionate grin at her guilty smile. Shaking his head, he pulled her up the steps, then pinched her ass as she squeezed past him.

Turning his attention back to the woods, he chewed his lip. Where the hell was Rick?

All of a sudden, Carl emerged from the cover of the trees, soon followed by the others, Rick now cradling a whimpering Judith in his arms as they all ran for the bus, undead bodies popping out from the tree line behind them.

Daryl dove back behind the wheel and started the vehicle crawling forward until the last of them had launched safely inside.

"Go!" panted Rick, "Let's go!"

Trundling down the road, Daryl cursed the old heap of junk, urging it to go faster as walkers started lurching out onto the tarmac. Swerving slightly, he heard the thunk of one or two against the hood, but managed to evade the growing press of undead bodies.

"Goddamn that was close." remarked Sasha with her nose pressed up against the window, the sound of hands slapping the side of the vehicle as they grunted on past, just skirting around the edge of the horde.

Forehead dripping with sweat, Rick clenched his jaw and rubbed at his temples. Another close call. And they had been forced to run. Again. His nerves were frayed.

Next to him, Michonne squeezed his thigh soothingly, but was soon leaning forward in her seat, craning her neck to look at Gabriel who was on his knees in the aisle at the front of the bus, head bowed and palms on the floor as he repeated something unintelligible.

"What's he saying?" she whispered to Sasha.

Sasha watched him for a moment more then turned back to Michonne. "Sounds like, 'second chance' or something?"

Standing just behind Daryl, Tahlia observed Gabriel with concern, then ventured a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"Gabriel. Come and take a seat."

Gabriel looked up, almost startled to see all the faces looking back at him and stared blankly around at them. "It's you. You people. You've done terrible things. But you need someone to show you the way. That's what God has intended for me. He's given me a second chance so that I can show you the way."

"Don't need you to show us the way." snapped Abraham. "Got a goddamned map."

"And to be fair, it was us that showed you the way." added Maggie. "Onto this bus and away from that horde back there that woulda torn you to pieces."

Gabriel squeezed his eyes shut, a pained look on his face, then started murmuring something again.

"What is it, Gabe?" Tahlia pressed her hand back onto his shoulder.

This time when he looked up at her, his expression was glittering with anguish and shame.

"My confession. It's time for my confession." He took a deep shaky breath and resigned himself to finally let it out. "Back when this all… began, I was in my church. My parishioners came looking for refuge, banging on the doors, the windows, begging me to let them in. The undead were outside, everywhere… I was so afraid… if I opened the door then that evil surely would have followed them in. So… I… I didn't."

"You didn't let them in?!" exclaimed Maggie in shock.

Gabriel shook his head regretfully. "I prayed. But I didn't let them in."

"You just left your people to die?!"

"Maggie!" hissed Glenn, nudging her and pointing at the tears now streaming down Gabriel's face. Whatever he had done, he was certainly still carrying the cross of it now.

Gabriel sniffed loudly. "I thought I was damned. But then God sent you people to save me in the woods. He has given me a path to follow now. He has shown me what I must do."

Daryl threw a glance over his shoulder. "This guy is fuckin' nuts." he muttered, prompting a smack in the arm from Tahlia.

"Maybe you should stop looking to the heavens for help and just start paying attention to the world around you." remarked Tara as she helped him off the floor and into the nearest seat.

Gabriel shot her an aggrieved look, then set his gaze firmly out the window, his lips moving in whispered prayer. The others exchanged a wary glance, silence hanging heavily for a few long moments before quiet conversation stirred up again.

Halfway down the bus, Carol beckoned to Tahlia, so she made her way down the aisle towards her.

"Let's have a look at that wound. Come lie on the back seat."

"You don't have to keep checking it for me. I can do it."

"Can we have this spot for a minute?" Carol asked Beth and Carl who were lounging at the back of the bus, and they obligingly moved. Carol turned back to Tahlia with a flat stare. "Lie down. And I do have to keep checking because if it were left up to you, you'd never let on how you're really doing."

Tahlia lay down despite her half-hearted protest. "You know how I'm really doing. Fine. Just like I keep telling you."

"Exactly my point." countered Carol, motioning to Tahlia to lift up her top as she knelt next to her and peeled back the dressing.

"God, Tahly, this is infected! It's not holding together! It's not getting better at all!"

Tahlia directed her gaze out the window and away from Carol's dismay. "I know. But there's not much I can do about it."

"Got any of that antiseptic cream left?"

"Nope, all used up a couple days back."

"How about that herbal paste thing you made at the church?"

Shaking her head again, Tahlia looked up at Carol. "We were in such a hurry to get out of there that I left it. Along with the first aid kit and the cloths we cut up for dressings."

"Right." Carol bit her lip in concern. "Ok. Well, hopefully we're only a couple of days out from D.C. You need to take it easy. No collecting firewood, lifting anything – including Judith – nothing that will aggravate this, keep opening it up."

"Yes boss."

"Tahly, I mean it!" flared Carol, distress sparking across her face that was disproportionate to the situation, then she quickly caught herself and turned her head to the side as she pressed the back of her hand to her mouth.

Tahlia's brow creased as she studied the older woman and tried to work out what was going on with her, then she mentally kicked herself as she realized why Carol had been so invested in her wellbeing.

God, she was an idiot! She should have been more sensitive as to what Carol was still working through, checked in with her sooner.

Sucking in a slow breath, Tahlia then said softly, "You can't keep beating yourself up about it."

Carol looked taken aback for a moment but did her best to pretend that she didn't know what Tahlia was referring to - even though she knew exactly what Tahlia was referring to, because one dark night on the road to Terminus, they'd done watch together and she'd confided in Tahlia about what she'd done and cried on her shoulder. With a hard swallow, Carol made to stand up, but Tahlia caught her hand and she dropped back to her knees.

"You couldn't have changed her. You did the only thing that you could."

The image of Lizzie kneeling over her little sister after stabbing her to death flashed painfully in Carol's mind, quickly followed by the wrenching memory of holding a gun to Lizzie's head as they both sobbed.

Look at the flowers, Lizzie.

"Was that the only thing I could have done?"

"Judith wasn't safe around her. No one would be safe around her. You made a choice for the sake of others. I'm just sorry that it had to be your choice to make."

Carol nodded, tears freely spilling down her face. "You said to me back at the prison that nothing was right or wrong anymore, that we just have to be able to live with ourselves after the choices we make. And that one…" Her voice cracked a little. "That one is really testing me."

Tahlia pushed herself up to sit and squeezed Carol's hand tighter. "The hardest choices always will. They shape us, change us. Sometimes they take pieces of us."

Squeezing her eyes shut for a second, Carol sniffed. "Three little girls." she said quietly. "Three little girls I've lost."

"You're looking at that the wrong way round, you know. You carried them. Cared for them. Loved them. Gave them longer than they would have had without you. Don't let that pain close you off, shut you down – you still have so much more to give. And it hurts, to give it again after loss, but it frees you, too. Feels even better in the end."

With a half-sob, half-choked laugh, Carol nodded again and smacked Tahlia on the knee. "You talk a lot of crap, you know? But somehow it always makes me feel better." She wiped at her face with her forearm and gave a watery smile. "Second person to cry on this damn bus already! What's going on?!"

"Everythin' all right back here?" came Daryl's voice as he approached behind Carol.

Carol stood quickly, dashing the remaining streaks from her face with the back of her hand.

"No. It's not." she said decidedly turning to Daryl, then pointed a finger at Tahlia. "Her wound is infected and it's getting worse. She's in a bad way."

Tahlia shot her a look of mock outrage, because she knew Carol was appealing to Daryl's concern for Tahlia as a surefire way of distracting him from her own upset.

And it worked like a charm, as Daryl dropped straight to his knees in front of Tahlia, his hands grasping at her shirt.

"How bad is it? Lemme see, Tahly!"

Shoving him away, Tahlia gave Carol a reproachful glare.

Traitor. She mouthed, suppressing a smile.

Thank you. Carol mouthed back, her own smile wide and warm despite her glistening eyes. Then as a parting gesture, she tapped Daryl's shoulder. "She needs to take it easy. Don't let her do anything. Not a single thing."

And then she laughed as Tahlia heaved a tortured sigh and briefly gave her the finger before both her hands were needed again to fend off a fussing Daryl as she earnestly tried to assure him she was just fine.

Abraham had taken over at the wheel and had his eyes firmly fixed on the road and a frown firmly fixed on his face.

He'd put everything into trying to protect Eugene. Put the mission first. And it had all been a lie. If he had anywhere else in this godforsaken world to go, he would have damn well up and left, but he didn't. So, he was still here, with these people, with that damned liar, and he was dark as hell about it.

A hand on his shoulder was so unexpected that he almost jumped.

"How're you doing, driver?"

With a brief backwards glance, he saw that it was Sasha.

"Been better." he replied gruffly, and then almost as an afterthought, "Been worse."

Sasha moved forward so she could perch on the handrail by the steps and peer out the dusty front window. "You took Eugene's confession pretty hard."

"No shit." growled Abraham, his grip tightening around the wheel. "Been protecting his sorry ass all this time for nothing! People damn well died for him!"

"People have died for a lot less." said Sasha matter-of-factly, and Abraham just glared at her.

They were silent for a mile longer as Abraham staunchly navigated the pot-holed road, then Sasha spoke up again.

"So, are you pissed because he lied, or because now you feel like you don't have a purpose?"

Abraham opened his mouth to retort, but shut it again as his frown softened.

Back at the beginning of all this, his only focus had been to protect his family – but they'd ended up pushing him away out of fear when he'd killed for them, and he'd ended up at his lowest point, filled with anger and resentment and hurt. Then Eugene had appeared and had given him a new focus, a new reason to push forward.

What would have happened to him if they hadn't crossed paths? His would have probably been a very short story.

Abraham shot a sideways glance at Sasha, wondering how she'd managed to grab him by the balls with that question, then wondering a little more about her.

Sasha just smiled. "And what else would you have been doing anyway? Got you to here, didn't it? Now we just look for the next thing to live for." She clapped a hand on his shoulder. "Right, I'll leave you to it, let you focus on the road."

"Why don't you stay a while longer?" suggested Abraham, the offer and the warmth in his voice surprising them both. "Could use the company."

The journey was slow – the main highways were often blocked with walkers and abandoned cars so they kept having to backtrack and navigate their way through winding backroads. Stopping often to check cars for fuel and to scavenge from the houses that were few and far between, they still didn't come up with much for all their efforts.

As darkness fell, the decision was made to pull over and stop for the night – visibility and road quality were poor on these narrow routes so they didn't want to risk driving in the dark and damaging the bus. Parking up on a winding hill afforded them a decent view of their surroundings, and they hunkered down for the night, sharing out a little of their meagre food supplies.

When they'd had something to eat, Daryl and Tahlia headed out to take over on watch. The righthand roadside bank was steep and as they started up the uneven terrain, Daryl put a hand out to stop her.

"Maybe you should stay in the bus."

"What?!"

"Carol said y'ain't meant to be doin' a thing. Maybe best if ya stay in the bus."

"I'm not an invalid!" protested Tahlia. "I can walk!"

Daryl frowned. "Don't want ya to get any worse."

"Doing watch with you is not going to make me worse. And I'm fine! Can you please stop worrying?"

Daryl tucked his hands under his armpits as he dropped his gaze to the ground. "Always gonna worry 'bout ya. Been worryin' 'bout ya since 'fore I even liked ya, so I sure ain't gonna stop now."

Tahlia's stomach gave a flutter because his little moments of vulnerability were so infrequent but so telling, and it always made her melt. His closed-off stance betrayed his true level of distress though, so she opted for lightness and gave him a little shove.

"I don't believe that. There was a time when you didn't like me?! Impossible!"

A smile tugged on his lips as he drew his gaze up to hers through his lashes. It did seem impossible from this side of things. "Pain in the ass." He unfolded his arms and tucked one through hers. "C'mon then. Just take it slow."

They climbed up a little way to find a place to sit that gave them an elevated vantage point over the bus and the woods beyond. Daryl was checking his crossbow and bolts while shooting sideways glances at Tahlia, her eyes focused far out into the indigo expanse ahead of them.

"Quiet tonight. What's up?"

"Just thinking."

"Ya normally think out loud."

Tahlia raised her eyebrows and laughed a little. "You wish I wouldn't talk so much?"

Rolling his eyes, Daryl nudged her. "Don't try change the subject. Just tell me."

"Nothing."

He nudged her again.

Tahlia sighed as she dropped her gaze to study her hands. "Well, you remember I told you that I used to go stay at my uncle and aunt's vineyard in Charlottesville?"

Daryl nodded, the pieces quickly sliding together in his head. "And… it's between here and D.C. Ya wanna go there?"

Worrying her bottom lip between her teeth, Tahlia stared out into the darkness again for a long moment.

"I don't know… there's probably no point. I called them, right at the start of all this. They told me that they were going to try and get to the coast, see if they could get out of the country somehow. Then the phones went down, so that was the last I heard. I hadn't thought about going there since, but now that we're kind of going right past…"

"'Kay, so we'll go." replied Daryl easily. Because it was easy to him. She wanted it, so he'd make it happen.

"No." Tahlia suddenly said firmly. "No. It's stupid. I don't want to make everyone detour just to go check out a place for nostalgia's sake. It's not like they'll be there. There's no way they'll still be there."

Daryl knew her well enough to hear the part left unsaid.

But, what if…

He jumped to his feet. "Stay here a minute."

"Daryl, where are you-"

"Just gonna talk to Rick. Stay here, keep watch."

"Wait!" Then Tahlia cursed under her breath because he was already skidding down the side of the hill back towards the bus.

Only a handful of minutes had passed before he was back by her side, although it felt like longer.

"Sorted. Gonna go there. It's on the route they planned out anyway, so we ain't even detourin'."

"Really? But what about what everyone-"

Daryl cut her off. "Ain't gotta worry 'bout no one else. They're all happy to do it."

He was well aware that Tahlia, a people pleaser, would always defer to giving up what she wanted just to avoid treading on anyone's toes – so he was happy to take it upon himself to toe-stomp for her if the situation called for it.

Tahlia knew this and it fizzed and filled her up to bursting.

"You'd tell me that even if they were all cursing me."

Daryl smiled. Yes, he would. But it happened to be the truth on this occasion. "Gives us somewhere to aim for. Stop off and rest for a bit."

"Ok!" she said, a little breathily. "Thank you."

But in the wake of that, Daryl could practically see the shimmer of apprehension descending on her. "Hey. Maybe they won't be there. But least then you'll know. Maybe we'll get some supplies too. Ain't gonna be for nothin', so don't let it worry ya."

Tahlia leaned into him gratefully, and he pressed a kiss to her temple, then thought of something as he pulled away.

"Gotta ask..."

"Shoot."

Daryl squinted across at her. "It a coincidence that your uncle lived in Charlottesville and your sister's name was Charlotte?"

Laughing at that, Tahlia shook her head. "Nope. Not a coincidence. When my mom found out she was having twins, my Uncle Jack – he was her younger brother and she absolutely doted on him – begged her to let him name one of us, and she agreed. But Jack was this big joker, could never take anything too seriously-"

"Huh, kinda sounds like someone else I know…" mused Daryl with a fond smile.

Tahlia grinned. "Maybe that's why me and him always got on so well. Anyway, turned out that he never thought she'd actually let him pick a name, so when we were born he hadn't put any thought into it at all. So, mom calls him when she gets home with us and asks him for a name, and he'd just come inside with the mail and looked down at the address on the envelope and was like, uh… Charlotte? And mom was all, what the hell were you gonna say if they were boys?! And dad was just like, could've been worse, least he wasn't living in Pflugerville. Anyway! They went with it."

Daryl chuckled at that story, then gave her thigh a little shove. "And what 'bout your name?"

"Mom just liked it." replied Tahlia apathetically. "No good stories with mine. How about yours?"

"Dunno." Daryl shrugged. "We never talked 'bout that kinda stuff."

"Got a middle name?"

"Yep. Don't use it though."

Tahlia could tell by his clipped tone what it must be. A name after the man who had tortured and tainted him.

"Was Merle's middle name too." Daryl carried on quietly. "Fuckin' arrogant asshole that our dad was." Then he gave himself a quick shake. "'Nuff 'bout that."

He didn't like to waste time thinking about his dad. Although it didn't hurt as much as it used to, because he now knew what family really felt like, and he draped an arm around Tahlia, the cornerstone of his family now. "So, might even get there by tomorrow. Maybe it'll be clear enough for us to camp out a couple days, rest, get you healed."

Tahlia smiled at that. That sounded good.

Except, they didn't make it to Charlottesville the next day.

Forced to take an especially long detour, they ran out of gas somewhere on the rural backroads south of their destination, and with no other vehicles or properties in sight, they abandoned the bus and started walking.

And only Tahlia laughed when Tara said, "Well, looks like the wheels on the bus aren't going round and round anymore."

She didn't have as much to laugh about the next day, however, when things took a turn for the worse.