Previously: While on a secret mission, Trip is captured by Orions who then destroy his ship and sell him to the Romulans as a slave. Together with new friends and the help of a group lead by a man called Kirak, Trip escapes, only to learn that Kirak is T'Pol's long lost father.
Brown. - As Kirak stepped into the room, he suppressed his upcoming anxiety. Finally he would hear what had become of his wife and his daughter, little T'Pol.
He looked around in the room, filled with soft, yellow light from candles. Pillows in browns colors were on the floor. Nitala, the housekeeper, had made sure the room met his requests. Bright light hurt his eyes, but the candlelight was soothing. In the beginning of his imprisonment, the Romulans had tortured him for days on end - so long that he had lost all sense of time - and had used new experiments, designed to break the Vulcan mind, on him. As a result, he now had difficulty maintaining a balanced state, and experienced physical problems - like the fact that bright light caused terrible headaches.
Vertek, his old friend who had escaped prison with him, followed behind. "The Human will be here any minute," he said. "Tilen is bringing him. I have heard this Human is an excellent engineer, who developed new systems for The Coalition. It will be interesting to talk to him."
Kirak was also interested in talking to this Tucker, but for far more personal reasons. He tried to hid it, but deep down he felt an almost overwhelming desire to learn more about what had happened to his wife T'Les and their child T'Pol. He hoped Tucker would be able to tell him.
During his captivity, the Romulans had used telepatic suppressors that blocked his bond with T'Les. The pain of that emptiness and loneliness from the missing bond had haunted him in the first months of being a prisoner. He had hoped with all his heart to feel her again after his escape four years ago. But when he had torn the suppressor device off his neck, there was nothing. Only a cold silence. His heart had been filled with sadness. T'Les had to be deceased. This Human, this Tucker, could confirm his suspicion.
And why had T'Pol married this Human? What happened to the man he had betrothed her to, Linan? Had his wife agreed to T'Pol's marriage to this Human, and if so, was she still alive?
In his mind he could still see T'Pol, a little girl that he had left behind to go on that last fatal mission. But he knew she wasn't a child any more; she was a married woman. Kirak still had trouble with that idea, however logical marriage – at least marriage to a Vulcan man – would be.
Which brought his thoughts back to Tucker. Had his presence in this dangerous part of Romulan space anything to do with his own enemies? Enemies who wanted Kirak dead, and preferably in the most painful and violent way possible? His thoughts were interrupted when the door opened and the Human entered. He was tall and his hair was in an unusual yellow color.
"You must be Tucker," Vertek said in what Kirak assumed was Tucker's native tongue. "I am Vertek."
Kirak's English wasn't as good as Vertek, but he still remembered some from decades ago. "I am Kirak," he managed to say as introduction.
"I am Charles Tucker," the Human replied. Kirak was struck by Tucker's eyes. They were blue as the oceans of Earth he had seen in pictures. "It's a honor to meet you, sir," the Human continued. He put his hand forward, and Kirak knew it meant some kind of greeting, so he nodded in response.
"I will get you a pillow, engineer Tucker," Vertek said, walking to a corner of the room. He picked two brown pillows and one orange one, handed them to Kirak and Tucker and then lay one down for himself.
"These are thicker and more comfortable for sitting than those floor covering pillows on the floor," Vertek explained. "Would you like some tea?"
Tucker's reply was an odd expression – how expressive the faces of Humans were! – as if he was taken by surprise by this question. But his words were more neutral.
"Yes, thank you." Tucker sat down on the pillow.
Kirak had heard about the habit of Humans to thank someone for actions on their behalf. He always thought it was an unnecessary, but a nice gesture. Tucker sat down at the pillow.
Vertek gave Tucker a cup, steam rising from it, and starting asking him about his stay in the mines and his travels since then. Soon the subject changed to engineering, as Vertek told the Human he had a degree in engineering. Apparently Tucker was an especially talented engineer, and had used some of Vertek's technology in his own design work. Kirak noticed that Tucker was careful in what he did share with Vertek. A logical reaction, having just met him and not knowing if he could be trusted.
In the midst of their conversation, Vertek took his cup, smelled his tea intensely and took a sip. This gave Tucker a change to change the subject. "I'd like to thank Mister Kirak, and you, for freeing my friends and I. Your people took a big risk and we're very thankful. But it raises the question of why you choose to liberate our group. Except for Mita, we aren't Kirakites."
"Neither are we," Vertek replied, causing the Human in front of him to frown slightly. "But Mister Kirak can answer your questions. I will leave you two, so you can have a more private conversation."
At that, Vertek rose, adjusted his robes, and left the room. A silence fell. Kirak saw Tucker shifted slightly on the cushion, reminding him once again the person in front of him wasn't Vulcan. Was this man really worthy of being the husband of his daughter? Then to his surprise, the Human reached in his shirt and took out a triangle-shaped pendant, a da ek'zurah. It dangled in front of him and Kirak recognized it at once. "My wife gave this to me as a wedding present. She said it was from her father, her last memory of him."
Kirak took it and looked at the markings at the back. Four lines had stopped: of him, of T'Les and two children belonging to T'Pol and this man in front of him. A feeling of loss cut through him like a lipra. "It's mine," he managed to say. He searched Tucker's face. "My wife, T'Les... Her line has stopped. Does that mean...?" He couldn't utter the words and that weakness embarrassed him.
Tucker nodded softly. "I am sorry," he said. A cold hand caught Kirak's katra. T'Les, his wife, was dead.
Brown. Trip stared at the stern face of his father-in-law. His surroundings, the soft light of candles, the brown pillows, reminded him vividly of that first time he had visited T'Pol's cabin. He had read the Koss's private letter to T'Pol and she had invited him to her quarters. To his surprise, she had asked him for advice. He remembered how nervous he had been and also how much he'd wanted to impress the woman in front of him, even though he hadn't realized the latter at the time. At that moment he had no clue what thoughts and emotions had been hidden under that closed face and he had been sure that the glimpse of emotion he had seen in those brown-greenish eyes of hers had been in his own imagination.
Kirak had the same eyes as T'Pol. And being married to a Vulcan woman for so long, or, more accurately, being bonded to her, had taught him a lot about observing people, especially Vulcans. First of all, there was no doubt in Trip's mind that the man in front of him was sick. Kirak's face had a pale, almost gray, unhealthy color. His expression was stern and the lines in his face were the same as T'Pol's when she was suffering a terrible headache. Trip had also noticed small, but deep scars on his face and hands, that had been there for a long time and suggested that his father-in-law had been tortured in the past.
Kirak spoke in a detached, almost cold way. But it was Kirak's eyes, the same as T'Pol's, that gave him away. When Trip had told him that T'Les, his wife, had died, he had seen Kirak's eyes filled with pain. He'd controlled that emotion quickly, but the glimpse had been enough to convince Trip that the man had deeply loved his wife and was deeply hurt by her passing.
Kirak's rasping voice penetrated Trip's thoughts. "How did she die?" he asked.
Trip explained, as well as he could, the circumstances in which T'Les had died, fighting against corruption in the government. He didn't like to think about that time when T'Les had died and T'Pol had locked him out of her life. It had also been the time that she had ended her marriage with Koss, a memory that filled him with depression and anger, even after all this time.
"Corruption is like the blowing desert wind, it infiltrates through the fabric of your clothes like it did the fabric of own government and by time, it tears down everything." Kirak replied bitterly after hearing how his wife had died. He closed his eyes and for a minute he seemed lost in his own world. "There are so many questions I'd like to ask you, mister Tucker," he continued after a pause. "My wife was very dedicated to her science work and she always wanted T'Pol to follow her in this field. Did my wife still work in science and did T'Pol study that as well?" Trip nodded, and explained about T'Pol's service as Science Officer aboard Enterprise. Trip noticed that the more they spoke about T'Les, the warmer Kirak's voice became. The difference from the cold and detached man in the beginning became even greater when he started to speak about T'Pol. "I remember T'Pol liked to read every book she could put her hands on, especially science books," Kirak said. "She liked to read them in my study room, in a corner where she could sit on the pillows and cushions. She also liked to do small science experiments in our living room, and I liked to help with those. We had a medium size telescope on the roof of our house and T'Pol and I would watch the stars together."
Kirak told Trip this story about T'Pol with so many hints of affection in his voice, that it reminded Trip how much he had loved his own daughter. In his mind he saw her again, her lovely smile, her bright eyes, those cute pointy ears of her... Deep inside, love, mixed with grief and pain, welled up.
His emotional response hadn't gone unnoticed. "What's wrong, mister Tucker?" Kirak said. "You seemed to be… distracted."
"I was thinking about my own daughter, sir. T'Pol's and mine," he said honestly.
"I see. I noticed on my da ek'zurah that two lines have been cut off. That's two children of you and T'Pol? It must be hard, maybe scientifically impossible, to create a child from two different species," Kirak replied in a neutral voice.
"There's nothing wrong with my children, sir," Trip said, hardly containing the anger he was feeling. "They were lovely. They deserved to live. Our first baby died a useless death that could have been prevented. The second child was a miscarriage. It's difficult for T'Pol and I to have children, but not impossible." He heard his own voice go down as he spoke, to end in only a whisper.
But Kirak understood him. "I grieve with you, Mister Tucker," he answered. He was quiet for a moment. "I don't know how it is with Humans, but Vulcans have a special..." Kirak squeezed his eyes, as if he had to think for the right word, "…connection with their children. The loss of a child can be devastating for a Vulcan parent."
"I know," Trip answered, very surprised that the Vulcan in front of him spoke so frankly about things that were taboo in Vulcan society. "It was heartbreaking, painful, and almost tore T'Pol apart. Me too. Her emotions were so overwhelming, like being pulled into a dark pit by a monster." He swallowed hard. Then, out of need of a different subject, he asked the question that had been on his mind the moment he had heard T'Pol's father was alive. "I know T'Pol's life was greatly effected by your disappearing. She thought - everyone thought – that you were dead. Did you ever try to contact her, to let her know that you're alive?"
The face in front of him turned to stone. In a clipped tone Kirak replied. "I have been a captive for decades, without any means to contact my family. When I escaped, I did try to contact T'Pol, but without success."
"And what about those Kirakites that you lead? How did that happen?" Trip pushed further.
"I am not the leader of the Kirakites. I have only expressed my opinion and they used that for the own political goals," Kirak interrupted him.
"But it has something to do with bringing Vulcans and Romulans together," Trip tried again.
"You know nothing, Human," Kirak responded sharply. "You express your emotions so freely." He stopped abruptly. Then with a small almost inaudible sigh he said, "I am only saying this because you are family. For a Vulcan, a Romulan's and a Heterian emotions are like the fire within a mountain. When it bursts out, it consumes everything in its path. Emotions lead to war, to hate, to destruction. We must control our emotions or they will eat us alive and destroy everything that we love. Vulcans choose logic to contain the fire of emotions. Romulans, an ancient military tribe of Vulcan, use military order, oppression, and dictatorship to control themselves. But Heterians, descended from the ancient farmer's tribes of Vulcan, use the way of slow growth into balance: they let the emotion go in an orderly way, so the fire can cool quickly. Just as the fire of the mountain cools when exposed. Once it has cooled the ground can once again become fruitful. A combination of all three forms - that will bring order into chaos. That is what my thinking was. The Kirakites use this in their goal to bring the lost tribes of Vulcan, the Romulans, the Heterians, and the modern Vulcans together."
Kirak spoke so quickly and his accent had deepened as he spoke that Trip had trouble following him. But the passion in his words had been clear.
Apparently ashamed that he had let himself go in such a matter, Kirak turned to Trip and said "You would never understand. It's a Vulcan thing. Why did T'Pol marry a Human like you?"
"According to her," Trip answered, who had expecting this question and had had time to think about his answer, "Our katras are connected."
Kirak frowned as if he had hard time believing his words. The man was as annoying as Trip had once found T'Pol, yet Trip felt a kind of sympathy for his father in law. Or was it that he really wanted the man to like him?
"T'Pol was betrothed to Linan. I made sure I picked a right husband for her," Kirak continued. "He must be dead, otherwise T'Pol would have married him."
Trip thought that his life would be very different it that had happened. He silently thanked T'Pol that she had told him about Linan, his death, and how her mother had found a new betrothal in Koss. "Linan was on a space station during a school trip when that station was attacked by unknown forces. He died during the raid."
"That is odd," Kirak answered slowly, like he was thinking aloud. He stood up, took a notebook from the table and wrote something down. With his back to Trip, Kirak continued talking "So T'Les didn't choose another mate for T'Pol after Linan's death and she later met you?"
Trip shifted on his pillow. He didn't like to talk about Koss. "That's not what happened. T'Les choose a man called Koss to be..."
"Koss?" The distaste in Kirak's voice was clear. Trip felt a strange kind of relief that his father in law seemed to dislike Koss as much as he did. "The widower? Son of Hiran and T'Pok of the clan of M'tek?"
Trip nodded and Kirak continued. "I told T'Les not to get T'Pol involved with them. You see, Mister Tucker, my family is wealthy and has political power. Or did. I don't know if that's still the case, but we were politically influential. Koss's family is poor and his father wanted to gain more political power. I never would have allowed that union. I am glad she didn't marry Koss."
As much as he hated to say it, he had to tell the man the truth. "T'Pol did marry him, sir," he replied. "She divorced him shortly after the wedding." He really, really hated to bring up this old pain.
Kirak frowned. "I don't understand. My daughter divorced? She ended her marriage to marry you? How long did she lived with Koss?" There was agitation in his voice.
"She didn't live with him, sir," Trip answered, remembering T'Pol's emphasis on this when ever this subject came up. He had never understood why she wanted to stress this so much. She had chosen Koss at that moment and not him and that had hurt as hell. It still did.
"No?" Kirak was surprised. "But you said she married Koss."
"She did. In a ceremony. Then she went to meditate for two weeks on mount Seleya and came back to Enterprise. That's the starship she and I were serving on." Trip quickly threw out the details, without really caring. He hated to think about that time.
Kirak made a sound Trip couldn't interpret. Then, surprisingly, Kirak sounded almost cheerful for the first time as he answered, "That's my daughter. Showing real courage and intelligence, she finds way to block the marriage." He leaned closer to Trip, amusement in his eyes. "You probably know this, Mister Tucker, but nobody mediates for two weeks on mount Seleya after their wedding ceremony. Only really devout Vulcans, or a woman who doesn't want to have intimate relationship with her husband. It's like throwing ice water over you on a cold desert night instead of putting coal on the fire."
Trip got the picture. Apparently, T'Pol had made it clear by her actions that she didn't wanted her marriage. Clear, at least, to other Vulcans, not so much to her Human lover.
"Which makes me conclude, with no surprise, that my daughter was blackmailed into this wedding ceremony," Kirak continued on a far more serious tone. "Why didn't you stop the ceremony?" he asked, pinning Trip down with a look.
In the years after T'Pol's marriage to Koss, Trip had pondered that very question, knowing that, at that time, he had thought of doing the right thing. "It's complicated, sir," he answered, "too complicated to explain."
"I don't see what's so complicated," Kirak started.
But Trip could sense that it was only the beginning of many questions that he didn't want to answer and he got angry. "'You act as if that wedding ceremony didn't mean a thing. But she did marry him."
Kirak looked openly surprised. "Mister Tucker, a Vulcan marriage contains of three things: living together, an intimate relationship, and the ceremony. But it's truly the first two things that make a marriage, not the last. By withholding intimacy with Koss and secluding herself on Mount Selelya to meditate, only to return to living near you… my daughter wanted you, not Koss. I am surprised that she didn't communicate that to you more clearly."
"I think she had a hard time accepting that herself, sir," Trip said softly. Kirak nodded as if he understood.
Trip's head was spinning. Kirak's reaction was a surprise, but now he understood that, from a Vulcan point of view, T'Pol had acted within the boundaries of her culture. She had chosen him. He knew that of course, but Kirak's reaction had made him see that it really was true: T'Pol had chosen him. Not Koss, him.
It made him very happy. He looked at his father-in-law and wished Kirak had been there to guide T'Pol. Trip also really wanted to fill in the blanks Kirak must have had about his daughter.
"Would you like to know you we met, sir?" he asked. "And what a great person she has grown to be?"
"That would be very satisfying," Kirak responded.
And so Trip told him. About that first moment T'Pol had entered his life. About their friendship. About T'Pol's wit, intelligence, her courage. And as he told Kirak about a rescue mission in the Romulan war when T'Pol had showed her bravery, about the time she had encouraged him and picked him up when he was down, about the support she had given him during their time of grief, he realized how much he loved this complicated, complex woman with her great heart.
I love you, T'Pol, he thought. I just didn't realize how much.
Brown. That night Trip met T'Pol in their white space. She wore a brownish sweatshirt and pants that looked awful on her, but he didn't really care. All he wanted was to tell her how he had met her father and how much he loved her. But he could feel her mixed emotions when he told of his conversation with her father.
"How was he?" she asked.
"He is a very unique Vulcan," he said to her. "Passionate, and full of love for you and your mother."
T'Pol went quiet. "He hasn't change much than," she replied.
Trip could sense the turmoil of emotions she was feeling. "And he made me realize how much I love you, darling," he continued, "and how happy I am with you in my life. And the baby to come."
T'Pol had looked down and tired in their white space, but his words seemed to have the effect of energizing her. Her brown-greenish eyes sparked.
"I miss you," he said.
She kissed him hungrily, showing him she missed him too. It was odd in the white space, he couldn't smell T'Pol, nor feel the heat of her body. But she was still there, whispering in Vulcan in his ear, how much she missed him and wanted him to come home. He kissed her back and the white world around them disappeared and there was only the two of them. Later, as both of them lay on a black floor, surrounded by candles, shining their soft light, he knew it was all in their mind. Even so, he enjoyed being with her, and as her head lay on his chest he simply stroked her hair.
Suddenly he felt her body stiffen. Great unrest emanated from her.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"The baby…" she told him, her body streaming panic now. "I can't feel her. There's something wrong. I must go to doctor Cutler." She stood up. "I must go. I will inform you."
He grabbed both of her arms, pulled her towards him and held her in an embrace. "Please let me know what's going on with the baby."
T'Pol placed her fingers near his face and kissed him. "I will," she said, and then she was gone.
Earth – San Francisco – Liz Cutler's and Amanda Cole's apartment
Brown. T'Pol felt like she was suffocating. Something was terribly wrong with the baby. She opened her eyes. She lay in bed, with a brown blanket on top of her. With a jerk she threw the blanket off and jumped out of bed. T'Pol rushed to doctor Cutler, who was asleep in the near by room.
"Doctor!" she called out before she suddenly she felt dizzy.
And then there was only darkness.
When she opened her eyes, Doctor Cutler was leaning near. T'Pol lay on the cold floor, it was cold. Her head hurts, it felt like she had a wound.
"Doctor, the baby..." she whispered. "I can't feel the baby."
"Maybe she is sleeping, T'Pol," doctor Cutler said, already scanning her stomach.
"No, I can't feel her. Something is wrong," T'Pol urged, trying to get up. "I think I also lost some blood." Faintly she pointed with her finger down her body to mark the spot.
Liz Culter gently pushed her down. "Don't worry. I will make arrangements for transport to the hospital." Doctor Cutler reached for her communicator on her bed stand. She contacted her colleagues, discussed T'Pol's condition and ordered an ambulance for a pregnant Vulcan woman with a hybrid baby.
Vaguely the thought crossed T'Pol's mind that if someone in Starfleet Intelligence was looking for her, they might pick up doctor Cutlers communication and know exactly where to find her. But she couldn't care less, as long as her baby was safe.
Doctor Cutler came back and took care of the wound of her forehead. Liz spoke softly to her, saying everything was going to be fine and other things, but T'Pol hardly heard her. Instead, she focused her mind on Trip, trying to communicate to him by the bond that she was being taken to the hospital.
Then everything happened very quickly. The ambulance arrived, they placed her on a stretcher, shoved her in the ambulance, Doctor Cutler stepped in, the door closed with a big bang and off they went. Doctor Cutler checked mother and baby's vital signs again. In the hospital T'Pol was place on a bed, and a lot of scanners and tubes were attached to her. Three doctors came by to check and finally Doctor Cutler brought the news.
"Look, T'Pol, the baby seems fine. But we've learned to trust a mother when she says something is wrong, especially a Vulcan mother with a telepathic connection to a child. And you did lose some blood." she said. "As you know, the baby would be transported to the artificial womb in a few days. We're going to do this now, for her safety."
T'Pol nodded, feeling more powerless than ever before in her life. The doctors and nurses quickly set up everything for the procedure. A nurse gave her medication and an artificial womb in a large tank filled with blue liquid was placed next to her. Another device she recognized as a type of transporter, but a third was unfamiliar.
T'Pol had heard of this transport procedure many times, but still she had a hard time containing her emotions when Doctor Cutler explained that the third machine was an internal laser device, designed to slit the naval cord, just before transportation. Cutler asked if she wanted a sedative, but T'Pol refused. She wanted to focus with all her mind and she knew several Vulcan techniques to subdue to pain.
And it was painful. An overwhelming, horrible pain. But it was nothing compared to that moment of transport. "Now," Doctor Cutler said and then T'Pol fell into a horrible dark pit, a stormy, black sea of loneliness and emptiness that pulled her down and drowned her. She had never felt so alone and so empty inside.
But then... the baby was there again and she was lifted into the light again. The baby's presence brushed against her mind, like a gentle whisper. T'Pol opened her eyes and in the artificial womb, surrounded by water, was the most beautiful little girl she had ever seen. She was very small, almost half the size of an average baby, but everything was there: head, body, arms and legs. In her tiny face T'Pol saw her closed eyes, they had the shape of her mother's eyes when she was sleeping. The baby had a cute little nose and on her mouth, that reminded T'Pol of the shape of Trip's, she wore a smile. T'Pol felt something wet on her cheek and she realized she was crying. The pregnancy hormones have that effect on you, she thought.
"We have a baby, Trip," she said in her mind, trying to reach out to him. And she felt Trip had heard her.
An overwhelming desire came in her to take the baby out of this machine and take it in her arms, close to her. But she suppressed this illogical wish and instead focused on her bond with the child to send her all the love in her heart. "Welcome, T'Lessa," she whispered to the child.