Snippet 3
Genre: Humor/Angst
Pairs: Implied Animal Abuse (Blake/Adam)
Parody: Family Guy
AU-Type: Canon-eqsue
Tag: Drunk!Blake, Promiscuous!Blake
How Blake Quit the White Fang
Simply put, Blake Belladonna had enough of Adam. His methods turned the White Flag is a savage version of what it once was. Seeing the massacres, they did nearly drove her to drink, but Adam giving her a black eye for questioning him on killing all those innocent people was the catalyst. She packed her things before downing a lot of scotch whiskey. Nice and drunk, she got herself a baseball bat. She found Adam in their shared bedroom with him sitting in bed reading a book with his reading glasses on. Blake stumbled a bit whistling a tune aiming her bat.
"Oh, Adam, honey. I want to apologize for questioning you." Blake said in a singsong voice.
Adam put the book down to get a grand slam to the face shattering the glasses on his eyes. Blood spurted out his corneas as he gripped his eyes.
"Oh Oum!" Adam screamed falling out of bed.
"By the way, I've seen fucking the panther faunus who delivers our food! He's twice as big as you and isn't a quickshot like you." Blake said putting her foot down on his balls getting him to squeal. "I've also fucked Sienna too!"
After a few more strikes, Blake drunkenly cracked the bat over his head rendering him unconscious.
"Lastly, I quit." Blake said slurring her speech as she left.
Adam would awake in a hospital to which the doctors told him that Blake's attack blinded one of his eyes and she had a threeway in his car leaving him a mess to clean up.
(A/N: Short, but anyone who gets the reference to Family Guy knows why. Edited and Finalized – 3/16/18)